S05.E05: Cold Feet

[OnceSane]

Quote

While scouting out a wedding venue, Schwartz shows signs of cold feet, and Katie hits him below the belt; Tom takes Ariana on a date but discovers that he wants marriage and children more than she does; Scheana learns a rumor about Lala.

[JenE4]

Lala says, "I'm not dating a married human being!" and "I'm not dating that married man they're saying I'm dating!" which can only mean that LaLa is dating a married alien or a married vampire or some other type of married non-human entity...or maybe just a different married guy than the one they think.

Ok, these girls ARE a bit thirsty--for screen time (not for DJ Jazzy James)--if they're not only sleeping with him but compiling evidence and then waiting until filming to confront him about it on camera. 

Gotta hand it to Kristin. Her "defense" for punching three people (nice montage) was that she'd hit James "hardcore." I don't think she got the point that physical violence isn't positive behavior: I'd punch him hardest of all!

I don't say this lightly, because all these Bravolebrities are screwed up, but what the hell is wrong with this Ellie woman that she would continue having sex with James WHILE he's berating her, spend the night, then realize that he will destroy her, so she's going to take a secret selfie as ammunition for the inevitable?! 

Katie and Schwartz should not be getting married. She goes from zero to jugular in a split second. Not that Schwartz is innocent with his passive aggressiveness, but her aggressive aggressiveness is just off the charts. 

Why can't James's "swag wagon" be one of those hover boards that spontaneous combusts--while he's on it?

[tinaw]

I am sooo waiting for tom to tell Katie off

Edited December 6, 2016 by tinaw
I think I mixed up Schwartz and sandoval

[ivygirl]

I loved Jax's impression of DJ James doing his thing at Applebee's. 

[whydoievencare]

While Katie is a horrible, horrible human being - never wrong, it's always someone else's fault  she is vile, can't ever actually talk about a problem without becoming defensive and doing the loud talk over so the other person can't actually be heard - but - I would want to slap Schwartz silly for the constant whining about how he doesn't really want to get married right now and doesn't really have a say and doesn't really want to spend much money, etc.....  

Edited December 6, 2016 by whydoievencare

[nexxie]

Tom's feet should've been frozen solid.

[movingtargetgal]

Scheana's faux outrage over LaLa's alleged affair with a married man is beyond hypocritical.  Scheana had an affair with Brandi Glanville's husband while Brandi was pregnant.  When Eddie's affair with Leanne Rimes was exposed in the tabloids, a crying Scheana went on a media tour complaining that he had been cheating on her as well as Brandi.  She then makes sure she shows up on Brandi's tv show and puts Brandi in the position of having to film scenes with her.  I love how she ran back to the coven to report what she had found out during her lunch with James' one night stand. Scheana is just a vile human being.  

[chick binewski]

Is "giving dome" code for blowing married dudes?

[snarts]

Scheana looks very pretty without all that makeup.  Lala should give that look a try. What is that weird lip pursing thing she kept doing during her convo with James?  

Damn, get some self-respect, Ellie.  Gigi too!

[WhosThatGirl]

Why are all these girls hooking up with James? Are they that desperate to get on Vanderpump Rules?!?  That's the reason, right?!?! Because otherwise.. I can't. I mean they're already giving us women a bad name for hooking up with him and then continuity doing it while he talks bad about them and doing it for camera time isn't a good look either but it's the only reason I can come up with.

[bichonblitz]

1 hour ago, movingtargetgal said:

Scheana's faux outrage over LaLa's alleged affair with a married man is beyond hypocritical.  Scheana had an affair with Brandi Glanville's husband while Brandi was pregnant.  When Eddie's affair with Leanne Rimes was exposed in the tabloids, a crying Scheana went on a media tour complaining that he had been cheating on her as well as Brandi.  She then makes sure she shows up on Brandi's tv show and puts Brandi in the position of having to film scenes with her.  I love how she ran back to the coven to report what she had found out during her lunch with James' one night stand. Scheana is just a vile human being.  

This is the reason I never liked Scheana and never will. Now she's acting all self righteous about screwing married men? Of course she denied that she knew Eddie Cibrian was married. Bullshit, Scheana! Wasn't it Stassi that hated Scheana during the first season because she had an affair with a married man and that was unacceptable to Queen Stassi? They're all such hypocrites!

  My favorite Schwartz really showed his ass at the wedding venue. You could see how uncomfortable the wedding planner was but he kept on embarrassing Katie in front of her. They both push each other's buttons. Oh, and Schwartzies package was a bit underwhelming but I did get a chuckle when the photographer made him stuff a peach down his pants.

Kristin, Ariana is right, your veneers don't look any different that your original skank teeth. 

Edited December 6, 2016 by bichonblitz

[ninjago]

Kristin is not crazy because she is a violent, drunk stalker.  She is crazy because she is so hypocritical she has crossed over to delusional.

[ScoobieDoobs]

Wait, was that actually a modeling gig Schwartzie was shooting?  Cuz that photographer seemed awfully into him.

Lala, lie all ya want to the chucklefucks.  But hun, don't dare lie to us!  Didn't she say before she got the Rover from her mother?  Now she says this human being who supposedly isn't married likes to give her stuff.  Mmmm, kay.

Another ep, and I'm still thinkin' . . . WTF is Stassi doing on this show?

Uh, has Peter taken some ugly/hot pill?  His face looked kinda hideous -- and yet he looked smokin' hot.  I'm confused.

Lemme get this straight.  This Ellie person is 34?  Cuz she looked 40-ish to me.  And she takes a pic of being in James' teensy-weensy twin bed in the corner of someone else's apartment?  And that's after he demeaned & disrespected her -- by telling her to her face while they're having sex that she means nothing to him?  This is the same James who was working out with FI, with that twiggish weakling body, right?  Ugh, the stench of desperation to be on this show is heavy & stanky for LA actress wannabe's, eh?

[itsadryheat]

Was Katie always this dark, rude, obnoxious, bitchy, negative, dismissive, __________, _________, _________, ___________, _________?

[ivygirl]

23 minutes ago, itsadryheat said:

Was Katie always this dark, rude, obnoxious, bitchy, negative, dismissive, __________, _________, _________, ___________, _________?

Some may say so--I've seen criticism about her basically since the show started. I didn't really become as bothered by it until this season (she paled in comparison to the others!), but now she seems to get worse each episode, and the wedding is bringing it into relief.

Schwartz's attitude about the wedding is totally tiresome and annoying, but I don't think the particular incidence of him saying "let's get a Porsche and skip the wedding" was a slam worthy of Katie's dramatic reaction. I mean, you'll have the Porsche for years--a wedding is an (expensive, if you're buying personalized tea towels) one-day deal. Don't get me wrong; I personally find weddings very important, so I'm not devaluing them. But even I might joke about the cost of a wedding being comparable to a Porsche so hey, let's buy this car and drive it to Napa by ourselves and just elope. 

Edited December 6, 2016 by ivygirl

[WhosThatGirl]

Katie never bothered me until this season either. I don't know. It has to be because she is now because of the wedding, the central piece of the season and she is now Top Girl in the group. 

I don't know what Stassi is doing here anymore either. I miss old Stassi. Like fun Stassi, she's so boring now because her stupid boyfriend at the time wouldn't film so we don't get to see anything about that, we only get to hear about them breaking up and not see it. I doubt that the scenes would have been fun but at least she would be doing something with her time here. 

[HunterHunted]

@bichonblitz Stassi only claimed to dislike Scheana because of Scheana's affair with Eddie Cibrian. Stassi would later reveal in the behind the scenes season 1 special that the real issue they had with Scheana is that she was cast on the show and they wanted Schwartz instead. To illustrate the height of their hypocrisies during season 1, Jax was cheating on Stassi, Stassi was cheating on Jax with Frank,  Kristen was cheating on Sandoval with other dudes and Jax, and Sandoval was cheating on Kristen.

I'm also not going to throw a ton of shade at Scheana for appearing on RHoBH because that was a straight up Pinky Vanderpump stunt. When producers suggested it, Lisa could have said nope that's too trashy for me. But she didn't. Lisa was more than happy to set that shit up. Both Scheana and Brandi are famewhores, but Lisa likes to act like she's better than this circus.

The issue with Katie is that she goes from 0 to blackout rage in 3 seconds flat and she's not particularly introspective. When Schwartz is busy cracking all of his marriage jokes, her response should have been the mirror of his comments when he came back from the therapist "We've been together for 6 years. I had to give you an ultimatum to get this ring. I worry that some part of you doesn't want to do this."

Solid argument Ariana about the relative awfulness of both James and Kristen. Though, I'd argue one of the chief differences between the two of them is that Kristen has no impulse control and feels deeply about everything she does in the moment. Kristen does things because it feels like the most natural and correct choice to make in that moment. While James is quite often dispassionately nasty, bored, and casually cruel. Like when he showed up at work with that tank top on to flaunt his sex scratches. He stayed silent about who he slept with until it caused the most damage and basically let that bomb explode. He's like James Spader's character in Pretty in Pink. 

Edited December 6, 2016 by HunterHunted

[ticklemepink]

Katie is awful, just terrible. However, I've not really bought into the whole "Schwartzie" schtick - remember this is an individual who purposefully poured beer over his girlfriends head which was one of the most disrespectful things I have seen done on this show which features James Kennedy. I have always side eyed him since that moment - he definitely has a nasty side as well. This marriage is going nowhere fast.

[ScoobieDoobs]

Soooo, just why are these 2 getting married?  Cuz Bravo is paying & it's giving them more cam time?  Neither one is exactly a prize in a box of Cracker Jacks.

Not buying that preview where Ari calls FI a bitch.  That had to be a role play, right?  Lame attempt to fake us out, producers.  Previews also show Pete lookin' kinda ugly & yet really smokin' hot -- again.  Stassi?  Zzzzzz.  More shots of Pete, please.

Why is Cigarette Sally so invested in James getting fired, that she feels the need to give a double-fisted bird-flipping in such a forceful manner to the cam?  

[bosawks]

I did love Jax's sincere joy over James' plight especially when compared to the fake compassion of Tom.

[zoeysmom]

4 hours ago, ScoobieDoobs said:

Soooo, just why are these 2 getting married?  Cuz Bravo is paying & it's giving them more cam time?  Neither one is exactly a prize in a box of Cracker Jacks.

Not buying that preview where Ari calls FI a bitch.  That had to be a role play, right?  Lame attempt to fake us out, producers.  Previews also show Pete lookin' kinda ugly & yet really smokin' hot -- again.  Stassi?  Zzzzzz.  More shots of Pete, please.

Why is Cigarette Sally so invested in James getting fired, that she feels the need to give a double-fisted bird-flipping in such a forceful manner to the cam?  

Much like Scheana Shay, these chicks seem to be more into the wedding than the marriage.  Weddings score big ratings, the problem is with this group of perpetual teenagers the conflict goes away once they marry.  I am curious what Tom and Katie's plans for employment are once they are written off the show or it wraps. 

Watching Katie go on and on about Tom not listening-Tom listens he just doesn't agree with her.  Katie has the two terms confused.  Nice walking away comment about the broken dick.  Either they are putting out a lot contrived drama for the show, or Katie is just the worst bride to be in a very long time. 

Why did they need 150 wedding invitations if they only expect 100 people?  Did they invite 300 people and only a third decided to attend?  At $18.00 a pop it seems like a big waste.

[ghoulina]

I, for one, LOVE the idea of Jax walking all the girls he's banged down the aisle at once. Someone please make that happen. 

That peach - spent more time in Schwartz's pants than Katie has. 

Sandoval prefers window units? In California? What is wrong with him? 

How does James get all these women to sleep with him? I am truly baffled. Ellie seems like a totally pathetic headcase. And it was even more pathetic seeing Scheana get so excited, because SHE has the newest juicy gossip to offer up on a platter to the Coven. Like a child sacrifice to her gods. 

I normally am not a huge Arianna fan, but I did like her pointing out the hypocrisy of Kristen's pearl clutching over people being friends with James. Kristen has done her fair share of deplorable things. And she really needs to stop calling other women skanks when she cheated on her boyfriend with his best friend, who also happened to be HER best friend's boyfriend. Wow. 

The veneer shade was pretty great as well. 

I'm so over Katie being nasty to Schwartz. How many men have been overwhelmed by wedding planning and made jokes about just running off to Vegas? My guess is a good portion of fiances have said similar things. NO reason to shame his penis on national TV. She's gross. 

[Ubiquitous]

9 hours ago, WhosThatGirl said:

Why are all these girls hooking up with James? Are they that desperate to get on Vanderpump Rules?!?  That's the reason, right?!?! Because otherwise.. I can't. I mean they're already giving us women a bad name for hooking up with him and then continuity doing it while he talks bad about them and doing it for camera time isn't a good look either but it's the only reason I can come up with.

I hesitate to mention that trope about women liking men who treat them like crap, but that's all I can offer.

Is there a storyline about Peter dieing and becoming a ghost that haunts SUR? I keep hearing his voice but I don't see him.

Is it just me or could the selfie that girl claimed she took of her and DJ Muppet Baby in bed be anyone? All I saw was the corner of a blond chick and the back of some guy's head. Speaking of which, do they expect us to believe DJMB works out with FI Tom and "Too cool" Arianna at the same gym?

[TattleTeeny]

If that's really Tom & Katie's typical back-and-forth, they somehow are simultaneously too good for each other and don't deserve each other. Seriously, if my BF ever did that tired and hackneyed old "Yikes, marriage = death!" / "She's the boss" routine in front of strangers, I'd gladly call the whole shit-show off. On the other hand, if I were Tom and basically not allowed to have a damn say in what is supposed to be a milestone event in my life, I'd be bitter too. I mean, she wants him to be excited about this...yet at best, barely lets him participate and, at worst, ignores his completely sensible requests not to put them in the poorhouse (and I say the latter simply in keeping with the narrative here; I assume Bravo's paying anyway).

Quote

Is it just me or could the selfie that girl claimed she took of her and DJ Muppet Baby in bed be anyone? All I saw was the corner of a blond chick and the back of some guy's head. 

You could see his room-divider screen and maybe part of the wall above them.

Edited December 6, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[Primetimer]

Meanwhile, the soon-to-be married couple turns off cruise control and heads for disaster.

View the full article

[bichonblitz]

Tom and Ariana must hate the fact that they were instructed by the producers that their "acting" role this season is to be friends with James. And Stassi must hate the fact that she has practically zero camera time and no storyline. How long is she gonna put up with that? Oh, that's right, as long as she is back to being besties with Katie the rest of the world can suck it, cause that's all she ever really wanted. Sure. Same with Jax, no story. These "veterans" of the show must be really pissed!  

Why aren't we seeing Kristin's boyfriend Carter? 

Scheana is already being portrayed as single, she attends everything alone and never mentions Shay. 

All we have this season is the wedding planning, LaLa's mystery boyfriend and James drunken drama. Not feeling any of it so far. 

Edited December 6, 2016 by bichonblitz

[ghoulina]

1 hour ago, Ubiquitous said:

Is there a storyline about Peter dieing and becoming a ghost that haunts SUR? I keep hearing his voice but I don't see him.

He was there! He just has really, REALLY short hair now and is pretty unrecognizable. 

 

1 hour ago, Ubiquitous said:

Is it just me or could the selfie that girl claimed she took of her and DJ Muppet Baby in bed be anyone? All I saw was the corner of a blond chick and the back of some guy's head

It really could have been. But I believed it. James was acting sketchy too me, protesting too much. He wasn't contesting the girl herself, but the time and date. No one photoshopped that, dude. Stop lying. 

 

35 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Scheana is already being portrayed as single, she attends everything alone and never mentions Shay. 

Shay wasn't seen that much even when he was there. He has always been super quiet. Blink and you'd miss him. But if he's really trying to stay sober, it makes sense that he'd opt out on going to clubs and bars. I wish his wife would be more supportive, but I guess other things come first. I'm not saying she needs to stay in every night. But she made it pretty clear last season that she LIKES when her addict husband drinks "a bit" because he's more "fun" that way. 

[jaync]

Dee jay fu-fu-fu-fu-fu-fuckface....hahaha!

Quote

If that's really Tom & Katie's typical back-and-forth, they somehow are simultaneously too good for each other and don't deserve each other.

Right? She can be a bitch for sure, but he should've never proposed if he's going to be such a pissy weenieboy about it all.

Quote

Why are all these girls hooking up with James?

Big dick? That's all I got.

[WhosThatGirl]

I just can't believe anyone would hook up with James. He's not funny or attractive at all. His voice is so whiny. He clearly has a drinking problem (possibly harder stuff as well) and he's awful to people. I don't get it.

[JenE4]

2 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Tom and Ariana must hate the fact that they were instructed by the producers that their "acting" role this season is to be friends with James. And Stassi must hate the fact that she has practically zero camera time and no storyline. How long is she gonna put up with that? Oh, that's right, as long as she is back to being besties with Katie the rest of the world can suck it, cause that's all she ever really wanted. Sure. Same with Jax, no story. These "veterans" of the show must be really pissed!  

Seriously. It's like VDPR: The New Class or VDPR: The Next Generation up in here with Lala and James suddenly the stars and this expansive new staff (Gigi, Ellie, and that other friend on the hike) coming out of nowhere with storylines. The OGs are going to be relegated to just wiping down the bar in the background and offering sage (hahaha) advice, like when the old star of a show suddenly becomes the parent or the teacher of the new stars. Maybe that's how Sandoval and Ariana will solve their kids/no kids dilemma. They'll adopt James since his daddy abandoned him.

but, hey, good news for anyone who wants to get on TV. All you need to do is get a job in any one of Lisa's restaurants, sleep with a cast member, be sure to get some evidence, then humiliate yourself on TV. Pretty solid plan. Who's going to go for it and report back?

Edited December 6, 2016 by JenE4

[ghoulina]

47 minutes ago, jaync said:

Big dick? That's all I got.

According to Lala it's quite the opposite. Not that I take everything she says as gospel, but....

[ScoobieDoobs]

Stassi's presence on the show is so annoying now.  But not because of Stassi.  She's still the same Stassi.  But the producers have squelched her -- in a desperate effort to tie her into the show.  It's not really working.

Clearly, Stassi has a life now way beyond the chucklefucks, but are we ever gonna hear about it?  Nope.  I can believe the storyline of Cigarette Sally being obsessed with James' downfall & various other trivial nonsense happenings at SUR & with the "skank" of Lala.  But we're supposed to believe Stassi cares about any of this crap?  Uh, no.  The wedding stuff?  Maybe.  But the other stupidity?  Seems like a stretch.

[ivygirl]

1 hour ago, JenE4 said:

Seriously. It's like VDPR: The New Class or VDPR: The Next Generation up in here

So, in this scenario, is James Screech?

[WhosThatGirl]

I think Stassi cares about Lala in terms of how she affects Katie. Katie is her friend so it makes sense she would care about who's bothering her. But her real life is more interesting. The podcast gets plenty of good episodes, she interviews legit celebrities.

[HunterHunted]

16 minutes ago, ivygirl said:

So, in this scenario, is James Screech?

Unfortunately, James thinks that the newbies are more like Degrassi: The Next Generation, making James the Drake of his delusional scenario.

[ivygirl]

47 minutes ago, HunterHunted said:

Unfortunately, James thinks that the newbies are more like Degrassi: The Next Generation, making James the Drake of his delusional scenario.

Oh, that's right: Degrassi had a next generation too. For some reason Star Trek TNG popped to mind.

So then, yeah. 

I guess FI is Snake... once the wonderful guitarist of Zit Remedy... now babysitting/humoring the goofballs that run the halls of SUR.

[Ubiquitous]

2 hours ago, JenE4 said:

Seriously. It's like VDPR: The New Class or VDPR: The Next Generation up in here with Lala and James suddenly the stars and this expansive new staff (Gigi, Ellie, and that other friend on the hike) coming out of nowhere with storylines. The OGs are going to be relegated to just wiping down the bar in the background and offering sage (hahaha) advice, like when the old star of a show suddenly becomes the parent or the teacher of the new stars. Maybe that's how Sandoval and Ariana will solve their kids/no kids dilemma. They'll adopt James since his daddy abandoned him.

What is it with all these new people we've never seen before? Is someone paying attention to our complaints about the cast getting too old to be acting this way?

I filled out an online survey for last night's ep and for a show I am not paying attention to, I got about 16 out of 17 right (I missed a question about what Cigarette Sally was drinking when she and StASSi were talking about DJ Muppet Baby) but a question about successful businesswoman Lisa Vanderbucks accusing LaLa of "going pink" AKA, having an affair with a married man, reminded me that they were both wearing a terrible shade of lipstick that made them look like baboons in heat.

[WhosThatGirl]

Even though our old cast members are too old for this and they are, I want them on my screen! Not James and all these idiot girls looking for fame. Like what fresh hell is this?

[HunterHunted]

3 hours ago, WhosThatGirl said:

I just can't believe anyone would hook up with James. He's not funny or attractive at all. His voice is so whiny. He clearly has a drinking problem (possibly harder stuff as well) and he's awful to people. I don't get it.

It seems like he must be a phenomenal fuck because who in their right mind would let him say "If you tell anyone about this, I'll ruin you" in the middle of sex, continue to have sex with him, stay the night, and hold on to this information for months.

If someone had said that shit to me during sex, my vagine would have been as dry as California during this drought.

Seriously, you are a grown ass lady fucking a 23 year old busboy/DJ on a mattress on the floor in the living room of some random dude. The only privacy you are afforded is a Pier One folding screen. And you let him say disrespectful shit to you. The fuq is wrong with you?!?!

[JenE4]

1 hour ago, HunterHunted said:

It seems like he must be a phenomenal fuck because who in their right mind would let him say "If you tell anyone about this, I'll ruin you" in the middle of sex, continue to have sex with him, stay the night, and hold on to this information for months.

If someone had said that shit to me during sex, my vagine would have been as dry as California during this drought.

Seriously, you are a grown ass lady fucking a 23 year old busboy/DJ on a mattress on the floor in the living room of some random dude. The only privacy you are afforded is a Pier One folding screen. And you let him say disrespectful shit to you. The fuq is wrong with you?!?!

I think we have ample evidence that James is NOT good in the sack by the fact that all four hostesses who slept with him (Lala, Ellie, GiGi, and that one from last season who was hiding out in the kitchen when confronted about it) all slept with him ONCE and never came back for more. The only repeat customer was Kristin because no one else in the cast would have anything to do with her, and even she said he was terrible and freaky with all of that scratching business. And he only has a girlfriend now because she lives in another state and thus doesn't have to actually spend any time with him.

Agreed on your other points.

[ScoobieDoobs]

4 hours ago, WhosThatGirl said:

I think Stassi cares about Lala in terms of how she affects Katie. Katie is her friend so it makes sense she would care about who's bothering her. But her real life is more interesting. The podcast gets plenty of good episodes, she interviews legit celebrities.

If she was giving us her usual fun snarky take on the chucklefucks, I'd say -- great, keep her around.  But her comments have been mostly forgettable.  The stuff about the wedding & whatever about Katie must actually be only a tiny part of her life.  She doesn't really seem invested in any of it.  She's giving us almost nothing.  And she can only comment on Lala as far as it concerns Katie -- because otherwise she has no connection to Lala & clearly couldn't care less about her.

Every time Stass shows up on cam, I so want her to talk about HER life.  But nope, the producers ONLY want her to comment on the chucklefucks -- and that's all, folks.  Meh, what a waste.

[panthergirl13]

I don't hate Ariana, but I did find it amusing to hear her talk about how marriage is just "buying into some societal thing" (paraphrasing) while sporting a pair of breast implants.

I'm just sayin'.

[bethster2000]

22 hours ago, ivygirl said:

I loved Jax's impression of DJ James doing his thing at Applebee's.

That was the highlight of the episode, I think.

[Roxy]

I avoided watching this show until last year. My niece made me watch it with her at my house and now, I can't stop. They are all pretty hideous, IMO, but they are also outrageously immature. I keep saying, aloud to no one, "how old are these people?" They are acting as if they're in high school or college and they seem to be mostly in their thirties. It's really disgusting. Being a partier at 22 is okay. At 26, it's getting problematic. After 30, it's having a problem. I think there are a number of them who need to look at their relationship with booze.

This Katie is nauseating. But I think she has a a real drinking problem. She is a mean drunk but also a spoiled child. She isn't even close to mature enough to be married. She's a brat. And, I'd hate to say it but she deserves it. She is too chunky for this show. In real life, I'm sure she's fine. But she looks fat on TV. I wouldn't even mention it but she's such an asshole to everyone else, it seems okay.

I loved the way WWHL went for these two. Even Andy's mom thinks they're boring. And that poll- well, their faces said it all. This Tom guy seems like a nice, wimpy person. He should run. She's abusing him.

Edited December 7, 2016 by Roxy

[ScoobieDoobs]

6 minutes ago, bethster2000 said:

That was the highlight of the episode, I think.

Dare I say it?  Jax was kinda funny in this ep.  Oh, fuck off, FI & Ari, for trying to defend James' idiot behavior.  You 2 are just boring the hell outta me.  Sure, Jax was baiting dopey Muppet.  So the fuck what?  Moron James fell for it.  That's on stupid-ass him.  Hey, even that commercial (for I don't remember what) with Jax was kinda funny.

Despite Ken's befuddled, senile old-man-carrying-a-dog routine, it's a BIG mistake to underestimate him.  He has quite a nasty temper when pushed -- or when he sees Lisa being mistreated.  I couldn't believe my ears on how disrespectfully Muppet was speaking to Lisa.  If she didn't fire him, then it's on her if she tolerates an employee speaking to her in such a disrespectful manner.

OK, Stassi's warning to all gals out there to NOT make a sex tape was sorta funny.  But unfortunately . . . not that funny.  Still disappointed by Stass.  She just ain't bringin' it.

Sheesh, FI's hair is bugging the absolute piss outta me.

[Adultosaurus]

3 hours ago, Roxy said:

She is too chunky for this show. In real life, I'm sure she's fine. But she looks fat on TV. I wouldn't even mention it but she's such an asshole to everyone else, it seems okay.

I don't like Katie, either - but side-eyeing the hell out of this statement.

[Rebecca]

2 hours ago, Adultosaurus said:

I don't like Katie, either - but side-eyeing the hell out of this statement.

Realistically though, few women look like her on reality tv. I, personally, an not saying I agree that it should be that way but it is seemingly true that she is "too fat for tv" when she would be a perfectly average "in real life" based on how most other women look on these types of shows. Apparently average sized women are not what people want to see on their tvs or we would be seeing more cast. 

Unrelated but true, Katie sucks. I can't believe they actually wed. Whoever said they both simultaneously each deserve better and worse than each other is totally right.

[Ubiquitous]

17 hours ago, ScoobieDoobs said:

Despite Ken's befuddled, senile old-man-carrying-a-dog routine, it's a BIG mistake to underestimate him.  He has quite a nasty temper when pushed -- or when he sees Lisa being mistreated.  I couldn't believe my ears on how disrespectfully Muppet was speaking to Lisa.  If she didn't fire him, then it's on her if she tolerates an employee speaking to her in such a disrespectful manner.

Are you questioning multimillionairess LisaVanderbucks's business acumen? ;-)

[eurekagirl mOo]

I alternated between laughing my ass off (wish that really worked) and yelling at the tv. Schena Shay who was Eddie Chibrans mistress for over a year is talking about how "awful" "terrible" "untrustworthy" Lala is because she...MIGHT be some guys mistress! GTFOH!

[syzygy]

19 hours ago, Adultosaurus said:

I don't like Katie, either - but side-eyeing the hell out of this statement.

It's interesting, because during this episode I was actually thinking about how Katie is quite pretty even if she could afford to be skinnier. And I said this a couple episodes ago, if anyone should not be on TV it's Kristen - she's ugly inside and has way too high of an opinion of herself considering how she, well, looks. And if anyone is overweight it would be Brittany this season, who has gained a lot of weight, but hasn't had much showtime and generally comes off like a nice person so it doesn't feel as acceptable to make snide comments about it.

I said this before as well but it's hard not to be petty when watching such petty people. But there is plenty to comment on aside from their bodies/looks, which are typically much harder to change than, say, fashion. I thought Katie's get-up at the Porsche dealer was doing her absolutely no favors, and I don't understand that nose ring at all. To me it looks ridiculous. (A side piercing would look better if she wanted to do one...) I also thought Lala's asymmetric dress in her talking head just looked... bad. On the flipside, I like how one of Stassi's recent talking heads matched her shirt color to her eyes.