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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

Chris Knight

By Chris Knight
in Counting On

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Minivanessa

Minivanessa

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(edited)

It will be interesting to see what light the book sheds on the Kelly interview. I also believe she didn't want to do it, and that she was devastated (still is) by the release of the police report. If she worked with JB's PR guy to prepare for the interview, then we know she was able to prepare for it. Not wanting to do something doesn't rule out preparing for it. Maybe she's a brilliant actress and was faking those tears during the interview, or maybe they were genuine expressions of how distraught she was about the situation. (As she sat next to her smug sister Jessa  telling the world how "sly" their brother was.)

2 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Maybe the book will reveal the reasons behind it, but if JB withholding the kids' money is their biggest and/or only problem with JB, then IMO, this book might end up revealing how much Derick is very much like his FIL. If that is true, then the Dillards missed the mark of learning any lessons during this feud and it makes me feel bad for Jill and her boys.

It's possible that Jill and Derick each have their own problems and issues with JB, and those two sets aren't identical although I'm sure they overlap.

Jill made some comments in SHP about how her family environment was controlling, no room was given for a person's individual thoughts, wishes, etc, and that not just obedience but complete agreement was required, while disagreement on anything at all was equivalent to disrespect (and from the context, rebellion although I don't think that word was said). Except for a comment by Jill that the IBLP's beliefs about control appealed to her dad, or men like her dad, she didn't call out JB specifically in those comments. From the context it was clear she (and Derick who chimed in at one point) was referring to how her parents ran the family. Both Jill and Derick also said that they had definitely not wanted her labor and delivery filmed for the show, nor had they wanted to interrupt their assigned stay in Central America to fly home for show tapings, but in both cases were overruled. I didn't get the idea their problem with that was lack of payment, but was lack of control over important aspects of their lives.  (ETA the issue of payment came up when she said they asked for reimbursement for their out of pocket costs for Izzy's birth afterwards. From the context it seemed it was a matter of "we hadn't wanted it on the show but went along when told we had to do it, so we asked for that reimbursement of our costs.")

I cringed and then cracked up over the breast milk post. Jill's being Jill. 

Hey, she's out of the cult. Probably because JB made a HUGE mistake in shoving a potential spouse at her who wasn't in IBLP or Vision Forum or the IFB in general. She's married to a lawyer working a job as an entry-level deputy DA in a small Oklahoma town, living in a subdivision and not a compound. I wish she weren't homeschooling her kids and I hope Derick sees to it the kids get better educations than that. Some people loathe him. Some loathe her. Some hate them both.

Life is messy and complicated, and I think the Dillards may be the prime example of that among the Duggar kidults. Except for Jinger the rest have remained solidly in JB's orbit, probably including financial control for many of them, as far as I can tell from available information. Although the one who married Hilary Claire Spivey is over in Texas. Jill made a passing reference in SHP to problems (strains?) developing within the family at some point and I believe reports that some of the kidults weren't in lockstep with JB as to J'inmate's trial. 

If the absolutely main or ONLY reason that Jill and Derick went up against JB was for the money? They hit the sonovabitch - HARD - right where it hurt him the most. So even if you hate them as human beings, I hope they get some respect for that. A thought to savor for the weekend, and I hope everyone has a good one.

 

Edited by Jeeves
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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

28 minutes ago, Jeeves said:

If the absolutely main or ONLY reason that Jill and Derick went up against JB was for the money? They hit the sonovabitch - HARD - right where it hurt him the most. So even if you hate them as human beings, why criticize them for that? A thought to savor for the weekend, and I hope everyone has a good one.

For me personally I don't hate Jill, at all. Also for me personally, I've never criticized the Dillards for getting Jill's overdue pay.

What I have criticized is Derick's countless lies, Derick's hate filled SM posts and the way the Dillards went about making this money feud public.

And my biggest criticism of all is the way, IMO, Derick is manipulating Jill to keep his unearned heroism going strong.

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Minivanessa

Minivanessa

Sorry about my original wording in the last para of my post. I was editing it simultaneously as you were responding. I wasn't directing my comment at you personally. I respect your contributions and opinions, and apologize if anything I posted appeared targeted at you in any unfavorable way. 

I don't think we see eye to eye about Derick, but these differences make life, and online discussions, interesting. Thanks for being civil and thoughtful and articulate!

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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

3 minutes ago, Jeeves said:

Sorry about my original wording in the last para of my post. I was editing it simultaneously as you were responding. I wasn't directing my comment at you personally. I respect your contributions and opinions, and apologize if anything I posted appeared targeted at you in any unfavorable way. 

I don't think we see eye to eye about Derick, but these differences make life, and online discussions, interesting. Thanks for being civil and thoughtful and articulate!

Back atcha.

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Meow Mix

Meow Mix

My feeling about the back and forth emails between Jill and JB's PR guy is that once she agreed to do the interview, she corresponded with him to prepare.  That is not the same as bringing him in or seeking to do the interview in the first place.  Jill could have done it reluctantly, but once she agreed, she figured she had better be prepared.  I think she was humiliated by the whole thing because she believed the purity junk she had been fed her whole life.  I don't think at the time she understood that what the felon did was not her fault and that she wasn't a used Kleenex or already chewed gum like she had been told.

As for her breast milk post, I agree that this is Jill.  It's also a lot of others in her generation who share all sorts of odd minutia about themselves on social media.  Maybe when she looks back on this in a few years she will cringe.  

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lascuba

lascuba

I think Jill might have felt some moral obligation to do the Kelly interview but I don't think she was forced. She wasn't just trying to prepare...she kept going back and forth with the crisis manager, insisting that they should accuse someone of taking a bribe. She regrets the interview due to the backlash, and maybe more now due to whatever she's learned since then, but I genuinely do not believe that she was coerced in any way to do that interview.  But I willingly admit to never liking Jill and Derick, so I'll never take what they say at face value without a whole lot of hard evidence.

I'll just never forget her behavior in that sexual abuse special they did to try to mitigate the backlash from the Kelly interview. She was pissed about being there....THAT is where she was coerced, I think.

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andromeda331

andromeda331

8 hours ago, Absolom said:

Perhaps I'm glad Israel probably isn't going to public school.  He can avoid being taunted over the posting of teddy bear pjs.  I think grandson, who is 11, last wore teddy bears by around 12 or 13 months.  

If he was going to school I'd feel bad for him that his mom posted a picture of him in teddy bear pjs. It's okay to be 11 years old and still loving teddy bears but that's not something you'd want your classmate to know.

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Salacious Kitty

Salacious Kitty

(edited)
9 minutes ago, andromeda331 said:

If he was going to school I'd feel bad for him that his mom posted a picture of him in teddy bear pjs. It's okay to be 11 years old and still loving teddy bears but that's not something you'd want your classmate to know.

How many 8 year olds are on Instagram following Jill? I think Izzy's modeling career is geared towards their mommies. 

Edited by Salacious Kitty
Autocorrect didn't want to make Izzy a possessive
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Salacious Kitty

Salacious Kitty

3 minutes ago, andromeda331 said:

Yeah but their mommies might show their kids. "Look at Israel? Isn't he so cute in his teddy pjs?"

I hope the mommies keep that to themselves and buy or don't buy based on their son's own likes/dislikes. Besides, other than close friends, how would the kids even know it was really Isreal? 

Bottom line: leave the kids out of it and off Instagram for a few more years. 😃

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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

I think showing young kids pictures and videos of their friends and relatives on FB and IG is a thing now. I see it on FB all the time. The moms will comment - JJ misses KK, CC thinks that looks like fun, DD says you guys look silly. I guess its part of "momming it" these days.

I don't think the pj pic will be a problem for Izzy right now because he isn't in school and they've just recently moved. But I suppose this is a good example of why mommy influencers shouldn't use their kids to shill products to the masses, even if the pics are headless or faceless.

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SnapHappy

SnapHappy

(edited)

Such lucky tykes to have a bored mom that pimps out their photos for pocket change. 

But when you have no skills, no education and no actual job, you just use what you find laying around the house: your kids....

And yes, I'm aware this goes for all the women born Duggar, not just Jill. 

Edited by SnapHappy
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crazy8s

crazy8s

2 hours ago, SnapHappy said:

Such lucky tykes to have a bored mom that pimps out their photos for pocket change. 

But when you have no skills, no education and no actual job, you just use what you find laying around the house: your kids....

And yes, I'm aware this goes for all the women born Duggar, not just Jill. 

It isn't even just the people making money.

I have had the joy of going to many of our grandchildren's sporting events and things this summer. I have witnessed many kids, all elementary, middle school age, in outright rebellion over posing for the perfect sm media post their parents want.

My own oldest grand, age 11, outright declared two years ago she would no longer pose or reenact things just for her mom to post on fb. Mom has honored that. She actually started posted less of all of them.

But god I am sick of #boymom, #girlmom and all family pics in a field

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Salacious Kitty

Salacious Kitty

(edited)
8 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Wasn't Jinger's tour publisher driven? I'm thinking Jill will have one closer to September.

They sent her out a month or so in advance. So, if this is similar, Jill would be doing interviews in the coming weeks. I believe release date is mid September.

Jinger also hard sold her book on IG, so no real difference there. 

Edited by Salacious Kitty
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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

3 minutes ago, Salacious Kitty said:

They sent her out a month or so in advance. So, if this is similar, Jill would be doing interviews in the coming weeks. I believe release date is mid September.

Jinger also hard sold her book on IG, so no real difference there. 

Except I think Jinger was a little late in the game pushing her book, and not quite so aggressively as Jill.

They're Duggars so I expect Jinger to push her book a little bit in the coming months to push up the numbers. I don't think it will help though because I'm guessing Jill will outsell Jinger.

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Trillium

Trillium

2 hours ago, crazy8s said:

It isn't even just the people making money.

I have had the joy of going to many of our grandchildren's sporting events and things this summer. I have witnessed many kids, all elementary, middle school age, in outright rebellion over posing for the perfect sm media post their parents want.

My own oldest grand, age 11, outright declared two years ago she would no longer pose or reenact things just for her mom to post on fb. Mom has honored that. She actually started posted less of all of them.

But god I am sick of #boymom, #girlmom and all family pics in a field

I was going to say Jill isn’t posting about her kids any differently than a lot of people her age. 
 

I have a classmate that would post about a dozen perfectly lighted shots of her son laying “sooooo sick” in bed while he was sleeping. That kid is 12 now and other than a rare family picture, he’s not in many pictures anymore. I get the feeling he got tired of everything in his life being content for his mom to get likes. 
 

Jill is just some people BEC (we all have them), but I’ve seen a lot worse IRL than what she shares.

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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

It'll be interesting to see how the IG generation will navigate SM when they have kids. I guess everyone will do their own thing pretty much like folks are doing now, but will the overexposed kids never post a pic of their kids? Will the kids whose parents kept them off their SM post pics of their kids?

Jinger stopped posting SM pics of her kids after her and Jeremy's book came out (the first one). In the book Jinger said she felt her privacy was violated when she was on the show as a child. Of course her kids were also on the show and she had been posting 'frontal' pics of her girls long after they wrote the book and only stopped when it was published.

Jill has never said she felt the show violated her privacy as a kid - as of yet anyway (and not directly). It seems now, Jill usually posts pics of the boys when she's shilling products.

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Minivanessa

Minivanessa

6 hours ago, Salacious Kitty said:

I don't recall the timeline when Jinger started selling her book online, but like Jill, there was an announcement months from publication. I don't remember if she was as relentless as Jill selling day after day. I do recall it got annoying about 6 weeks out, about the time her publicity tour started. 

I'm not at all expert in these matters, but I believe that these days a publisher expects an author to be actively involved in promoting their book. I can't slam Jinger or Jill for diligently - or relentlessly - promoting their books. They're basically just doing their job. 

In the "old days," authors tried to get as many bookstore appearances as they could, when they had a new book out. The better-selling authors were taken around on multi-city tours to make those appearances. I have a few fond memories from the 90's of attending appearances at indie bookstores by authors whose novels I really liked. 

The internet and social media have changed the world in so many ways. Including putting more of the promotional work in the authors' hands.

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Meow Mix

Meow Mix

On 7/21/2023 at 4:53 PM, GeeGolly said:

Jinger stopped posting SM pics of her kids after her and Jeremy's book came out (the first one). In the book Jinger said she felt her privacy was violated when she was on the show as a child. Of course her kids were also on the show and she had been posting 'frontal' pics of her girls long after they wrote the book and only stopped when it was published.

Jill has never said she felt the show violated her privacy as a kid - as of yet anyway (and not directly). It seems now, Jill usually posts pics of the boys when she's shilling products.

Neither Jinger nor Jill stopped posting pictures of their kids.  They just started posting pictures of the backs of their kids heads instead.  It's the same to me and is still exploiting their kids because they have nothing else interesting going on.  Their kids aren't that interesting either because they seem to be just regular kids.

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LilJen

LilJen

On 7/21/2023 at 8:29 PM, Jeeves said:

I'm not at all expert in these matters, but I believe that these days a publisher expects an author to be actively involved in promoting their book. I can't slam Jinger or Jill for diligently - or relentlessly - promoting their books. They're basically just doing their job. 

In the "old days," authors tried to get as many bookstore appearances as they could, when they had a new book out. The better-selling authors were taken around on multi-city tours to make those appearances. I have a few fond memories from the 90's of attending appearances at indie bookstores by authors whose novels I really liked. 

The internet and social media have changed the world in so many ways. Including putting more of the promotional work in the authors' hands.

Years ago, publishers cut way back on advertising/marketing. This why there are so many celebrity “writers.” (Not that the Duggars really are; low on the list.) When Madonna or [pick a big name] puts out a children’s book,  the books sell themselves. I remember being pretty let down when my husband began publishing kids’ books… ZERO marketing. Publishers are lazy as heck with 99% of book sales. So… yeah, Jill and Jinger must do their own marketing.

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Zella

Zella

(edited)

Some of that shift is also simply a reflection of how much book sales have shifted online. Traditional publisher methods of marketing books that centered on bookstores don't work as well versus author promotion online in that situation. A lot of publishers want known entities to write nonfiction books and won't even consider someone without an established platform because they want that built-in market an author can tap into. It's a narrow-minded approach that excludes people with worthy books and not one I agree with for that reason, but I understand the impetus behind it. A lot of publishers who didn't shift went out of business. 

Edited by Zella
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