Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[DangerousMinds]

For someone who claims that she isn't "worldly" and claims she's naive, and focusing on purity, sure has started wearing tight and bust enhancing shirts and short skirts! Then throw in the rock groupie make-up look, tousled hair and porn star lip poses and Jessa Duggar is sure throwing her all on the altar of trying to look seductive.

Right, but ask her to walk down just one city block dressed and made up that way without family, film crew, or bodyguards and the poor thing would be scared shitless at the kind of attention she'd get.

[mythoughtis]

I think Jessa and Ben's courtship will begin moving along now that Jill has married.  I do not think that is because they 'have let Jill have her day in the limelight'.  I do think they have been taking it slower because they are younger, Ben is still in school, and they don't have money. (again, Jim Bob and Michelle have money, the offspring don't).  However, once these two see the freedom that Derick and Jill have since they got married, they are going to be lusting after that for themselves.   If Derick can resist the Duggar-Gothard cult worship, Jill has a chance to a lot more freedom.  Jessa wants that for herself.   

 

To me, the only things that might slow this down are 1. If Ben and Jessa are smart enough to realize Derick's education makes a big difference, or 2.  Ben or Jessa's parental units refuse to give permission for engagement until some goal is met.

Edited June 26, 2014 by mythoughtis

[PinkSprinkles]

3. Jessa realizes what a dud Bin is and tells him to get lost. 

[DangerousMinds]

I believe Ben just recently started college work. I assume the degree is a ways away.

[Absolom]

Ben should have put a year in at community college in Hot Springs.  I'm not sure he finished the spring semester.

[DangerousMinds]

I don't think he was attending college full time though.

[bigskygirl]

I thought he was attending a community college. Of course, he may struggle because he is traveling along with the rest of the Duggar dog and pony show at times.

[Sew Sumi]

During the school year, he only traveled with them on weekends. However, as @Absolom noted, there are some rumors floating around that he wasn't seen at school after spring break and that he was working construction for a "Mr. Jim" (maybe the sound guy, the poster didn't differentiate) "up north" and that he was going to transfer to the Univ. of Arkansas.The Duggars are north of Hot Springs, so make of that what you will. The info came from the tumblr, so I don't count it as a reliable source. Also, don't most 4 year schools require CC transfers to have completed gen ed courses and lower division courses in one's intended major? He hasn't finished 2 years of college; he just graduated high school a year ago. So yeah, I take the rumors with a ton of salt.

 

Bin posted another selfie today, so I have a feeling that they're separated at the moment. Their collective narcissism is going to be their undoing; even their fans are going to burn out on this stuff sooner or later.

[Fuzzysox]

Hopefully Bin is a goner. Did everyone see the cute guys that were at the TTH after the wedding? Anyone of those guys are a huge step up from Bin. Even Jinger was hanging out with Skyler (I can't remember his last name) because he is HOT! Go Jinger go attach yourself to someone that is going to take you places.

Was Bin even at the wedding?? Haven't seen any pictures of him being there.

[PinkSprinkles]

Is is possible to have multiple courtships? If so, that's one way to meet more guys. 

[Vincom]

Is is possible to have multiple courtships? If so, that's one way to meet more guys. 

Yes, if you're a man and FLDS.

[McKay]

Skyler Weiss is pretty cute and there have been rumors about him and Jinger for a while.  Time will tell!

[starfire]

I don't understand why Jessa goes by @JessaSeewald on Twitter. Does this mean they are "secretly" engaged? She can't hug him or hold hands but she can use his last name? Weird.  I know Jill started going by @JillDillard on Twitter after she got engaged to Derrick. She changed her last name the same day she got engaged from what I have read.  I am not sure how long Jessa has been using that handle, but if Boob and Mullet have not officially approved of an engagement, I am surprised they would allow her to start using his last name already.

[lottiedottie]

I don't understand why Jessa goes by @JessaSeewald on Twitter. Does this mean they are "secretly" engaged? She can't hug him or hold hands but she can use his last name? Weird.  I know Jill started going by @JillDillard on Twitter after she got engaged to Derrick. She changed her last name the same day she got engaged from what I have read.  I am not sure how long Jessa has been using that handle, but if Boob and Mullet have not officially approved of an engagement, I am surprised they would allow her to start using his last name already.

Maybe Jessa thinks its a foregone conclusion that she is going to marry this guy. Do these people ever not marry the person they are courting? Seems like the Duggars wouldn't allow them to court unless they were very sure a marriage was going to happen. Wouldn't it be whore-y of a girl to court different guys?

[MrMattyMatt]

. Do these people ever not marry the person they are courting?

 

Yes, there was at least one Bates failed courtship.

 

It all makes me wonder how much of a setup these Duggar courtships are.  The whole Jill situation just all seemed like perfect timing for TLC and filming.

[PinkSprinkles]

Yes, there was at least one Bates failed courtship.

 

It all makes me wonder how much of a setup these Duggar courtships are.  The whole Jill situation just all seemed like perfect timing for TLC and filming.

 

Could you imagine if Derrick turned Jill down? She would have been inconsolable. I think JB gets to know a guy for a year before hoisting them on his daughters to prevent a failed courtship. 

[LazyToaster]

I'm not sure I understand their whole approach, but I hope they don't try to strong arm these couples to stick with a courtship followed by engagement then marriage IF the courtship isn't working out.

It seems to me that the whole courtship thing is a trial offer of sorts to see if you are compatible etc. so, if the spark isn't there or you don't get along you can stop. Wait, is that too much like dating? Confusing!

[PinkSprinkles]

Their "courtship" model is dating. It just comes with ridiculous restrictions. Courtships don't always "fail" because the kids aren't allowed to figure what they like and don't like in a person. Not being "quick to anger" is a nice requirement on paper, but what if you find a guy like that and after the wedding find that he won't step up and defend you? (in a situation that calls for it)

[BitterApple]

I don't think Bin will ever finish college. He's too enamored with the fame already. My prediction is he'll marry Jessa and angle for some cushy FRC job like Smuggar did. He's pimping the anti-abortion message pretty hard these days.

[Fuzzysox]

While the Bates had one failed courtship Zach went on to marry up from the girl he was courting. I think Whitney is lovely and lively unlike Sarah was.

 

As for the Duggars it's been swept under the table but I think Josh was almost engaged to a girl from a political family. Boob had a falling out with the dad then the courtship/engagement fell through. Does anyone else remember this?

[Almost 3000]

While the Bates had one failed courtship Zach went on to marry up from the girl he was courting. I think Whitney is lovely and lively unlike Sarah was.

 

As for the Duggars it's been swept under the table but I think Josh was almost engaged to a girl from a political family. Boob had a falling out with the dad then the courtship/engagement fell through. Does anyone else remember this?

That was quoted a long time ago as fact on the old TWOP thread from the same poster that started the "sin in the camp" rumor. It has been repeated many times as true but its been pretty much proven elsewhere that the poster was a phony that dropped tid bits here and there as a Duggar family acquaintance.

[PinkSprinkles]

Josh was engaged/in a courtship before, though. I believe Cousin Amy confirmed that. 

Edited June 28, 2014 by PinkSprinkles

[Absolom]

I think that's become part of the mythology. 

[Literata]

 

That was quoted a long time ago as fact on the old TWOP thread from the same poster that started the "sin in the camp" rumor.

I do wonder, though, if there was some truth to that, based on the fact that Smuggar asked Bin, "How many girls have you courted?" It seemed like an odd question, but not so odd if you're a guy who courted more than one person.

[Absolom]

Josh would have had to have been near to unbelievably young to have courted before Anna.  It was all based of an anonymous posting on the internet with absolutely no verification.  I went looking for copies I made when I saw those old stories and it says Josh was 16 or 17 at the alleged betrothal.  Then someone says it was "Ruth" who made that allegation and she's been established to have been a fraud. 

[Almost 3000]

Thanx @Absolom that's exactly what I was referring to but didn't want to give anymore weight to "Ruth" or any other of her phony personas.

[Micks Picks]

In my opinion Ben is beyond weird with his FB postings on abortion.  What a ghoul.

 

He states he works for some hours for some gal in insurance, and is going to a college.  He could be taking as little as one class (probably is, and in something insurance related or maybe in basic English grammar).  He loves to say me and Jessa and so on.  I'd love to see his personalized part of the insurance policies.  "So her and Al want to get $1000 if one dies, double if both die..."  

[Lillybee]

Yes, there was at least one Bates failed courtship.

 

It all makes me wonder how much of a setup these Duggar courtships are.  The whole Jill situation just all seemed like perfect timing for TLC and filming.

 

The Maxwells have also had failed courtships. One of the reversal boys, I believe it was Joseph, got engaged to a girl from the Munck family. The girl broke off the engagement just days before the wedding was scheduled. She was from a fundie family that sometimes had fun so I am glad that she never wound up in Maxhell.

[roamyn]

《I'd love to see his personalized part of the insurance policies.  "So her and Al want to get $1000 if one dies, double if both die..." 》

He can't sell insurance w/o a bunch of licenses. It's against federal law. And I doubt at this stage he has all those licenses. The testing is very hard.

[Ljohnson1987]

It irked me when Smuggar asked Derick how many girls he had courted. We know that Smuggar got around before he met Anna. Why does it matter? Derick should be allowed to date, and see what he likes before settling down. The Dill courtship seemed lightening fast. 

[MrMattyMatt]

And really, what answer was Smuggar looking for?  Didn't Bin say Jessa was his first courtship?  I can't believe he didn't have at least one "unoffical" girlfriend before Jessa...

[cereality]

I don't understand how suitors wouldn't lie to the "how many courtships have you had" question from dads and brothers. There's always ways to finagle the truth -- i.e. well I was talking to that girl but I didn't actually say "will you court me" so it's not a courtship. And even if you were in an official courtship, is there that much fear that the other family would find out you lied and drop you? Say Chad had another courtship, lied, and later Gil found out -- by this time Erin has given away her heart, could Gil really have forced a break-up?

[Ivy26]

I've been trying to follow the timing of everything.  Do you think maybe Jill and Derrick were a couple way before Ben and Jessa?  The courtship of Jill was way fast and Jessa's has seemed to have lingered for a while (in their world, obviously not ours).  So it makes me wonder if Jessa's courtship was kind of thrown together for the viewers.  They just seem so incompatible, and she is snarky as hell

[cmr2014]

If Bin is actually going to attend the U of AR this year, I think his courtship with Jessa will end pretty quickly. There are lots of pretty girls there who would be happy to hold hands, and kiss, and possibly more. If he and Jessa can't marry until he is financially stable, then that won't be for another 3-4 years. Jessa may be fine with holding off on holding hands for another 3-4 years, but I don't think Bin will be able to hold out.

 

He may like being on TV, and may like having a pretty girlfriend, but he's a teenage boy, and I think the temptation will just be too great.

[DangerousMinds]

Now all I can think of is "The Courtship of Eddie's Father!!"

[Hpmec]

Bin may want to have his cake and eat it too. He's enough of a famewhore to want to remain in the courtship with Jessa, which means getting his face on tv. However, I can easily see him seeking out a little action on the side.

[BitterApple]

Yeah, if Bin is going to U of A, he'll definitely fall into temptation. Any big D-1 school that revolves around football is always a huge party school. Jessa is pretty, but so are a million other girls who don't have sticks up their asses. Maybe Jessa is hoping Bin screws up so she has an excuse to get rid of him.

[Bean421]

I don't know how tied Bin is to his family, but they seem pretty invested in this relationship. They've been pretty active on Instagram. I'm sure they are strongly encouraging him to stick with Jessa.

[Ivy26]

 Maybe Jessa is hoping Bin screws up so she has an excuse to get rid of him.

 

THIS!  She accepted the courtship, and is the only one who can end it.  Sending his young horny butt to college (and a secular one at that!) will change the Fundie view point, and then she can get out of all of this with her smugness intact

[BitterApple]

Ivy26, regarding the courtship timing, I swear I saw Jill wearing that heart-shaped necklace in the first or second episode of the season. I remember noticing it because I didn't like it, I thought the pendant was too big.

It could just be wonky editing where footage from later in the season was used as filler for earlier episodes, but I'm totally confused by the timeline as well.

[trimthatfat]

But she keeps saying "I love you" to Ben.  I don't get that.  It seems like giving away too many pieces of the heart for the courting stage.  You'd think if they were going to bag this romance, they would have done so a long time ago.

 

I cringe every time they say 'I love you'. You can say 'I love you', but you can't hold hands? That makes no sense.

[Skittl1321]

 

She accepted the courtship, and is the only one who can end it.

 

Where are people getting this from? Courtship isn't any sort of binding agreement, so a man could end it just as much as a woman could.  I'm guessing it is more socially acceptable/traditional for the woman to end it though.

Edited June 30, 2014 by Skittl1321

[Ivy26]

From what I understand of this culture, the guy asks the girl to court because he's almost 100% positive this is the girl he will marry. That "God laid it on his heart" that this is the girl for him.  So in effect he's already committed to this, and the courtship, for him, is really a formality. 

 

I can totally seeing Gothardites being okay with arranged marriages.  "I want that one!"  "Well, let's set up the 'courtship', make her think she has a choice, wink wink!"

[Literata]

"God laid it on his heart"

 

How wonderfully handy to be able to use that as a reason for anything one wants to do. :/

[Skittl1321]

Both the Duggar's and the Bates's talk about courtship as a "getting to know you" period. (You know, like dating.)  They've never said anything about it being unbreakable for the boy, and both have had boys courting.

 

God laid it on the boy's heart that he wants to get to know the girl better. Since he doesn't ask her to marry him right away, I don't think God has yet laid it on his heart to want to marry her.

 

Otherwise they'd just propose and the girl could break off the proposal.

 

I guess I just think this is like "sin in the camp"- if it is repeated enough times, it must be true. I'm just wondering if anyone has a clip or a blog post from the Duggars, Maxwells, Bateses, ATI or something that says that.

Edited June 30, 2014 by Skittl1321

[alt0233]

A few years ago there was an episode of True Life on MTV that had a couple who met/went to school at Mississippi State who were waiting for their wedding day for their first kiss. There's more temptation at a large school, but it's still possible.

[lottiedottie]

A few years ago there was an episode of True Life on MTV that had a couple who met/went to school at Mississippi State who were waiting for their wedding day for their first kiss. There's more temptation at a large school, but it's still possible.

Possible when both parties are at the same school, but much harder when one is away and the other is 'back home', don't you think?

 

At any rate, Ben seems like a douchey famewhore. But I also think those two want to get it on something fierce, whether they get married or not! I think they both wish they could sin for just one day.

[DangerousMinds]

It would wonderful if Jessa could sign on and take some college courses too, but of course that will never happen. What is she planning on doing while Bin is going to college, hanging around the compound curling her hair?

[beagletime]

I would love to see Jessa go to cosmetology school.  She sure seems to like doing hair and makeup. We've seen her doing her sister's hair and makeup. I would think that would be an approved female activity. 

[DangerousMinds]

But could she do anything but some kind of variation on the same long, wavy hairstyle?