Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

[LoneHaranguer]

 

I was at a red light behind an SUV with one of those back-seat DVD players.  There weren't kids in the back seat.  Full grown adults, riding through town, watching porn (clearly visible through the rear window and my windshield).

Hopefully that's all they were doing. Just watching.

That's where scotch-guarding would come in.

[riley702]

Too little, too late. A killer whale (actually the largest species of dolphin) with a partially collapsed dorsal fin is not "thriving".

Umm, survival in the wild is comparable to survival in captivity? That's not a good thing. Animals in captivity usually have significantly longer life spans because they aren't exposed to predators, are treated for illnesses and don't have to scrounge for food. If the stresses from captivity are equal to or exceeding stresses in the wild, you're not doing a good job. And yes, I hate those droopy dorsals, too. I know they've speculated it's caused by not enough room (which is bad enough), but I always think the animal has given up on life. I've noticed that recently, Sea World has gone out of their way to avoid showing those fins in ads and promo spots.

Edited April 23, 2015 by riley702

[iMonrey]

 

Oh, but I can't help but crack up when the kid says, "Does your dad know about my hamster having babies in the back seat?" and little Mitch says, "That's just normal wear-and-tear, dude."  Something about the way he says it just makes me laugh.

 

This commercial raises all kinds of questions. First of all, the dad overhears this conversation and is like "Huh?" clearly indicating this happened without his knowledge. So - the kids were just playing around in the back seat of the car, in the driveway or something? What if they'd hit the parking brake and rolled out into the street? What the heck were they doing with their pregnant hamster back there? 

[Brattinella]

Umm, survival in the wild is comparable to survival in captivity? That's not a good thing. Animals in captivity usually have significantly longer life spans because they aren't exposed to predators, are treated for illnesses and don't have to scrounge for food. If the stresses from captivity are equal to or exceeding stresses in the wild, you're not doing a good job. And yes, I hate those droopy dorsals, too. I know they've speculated it's caused by not enough room (which is bad enough), but I always think the animal has given up on life. I've noticed that recently, Sea World has gone out of their way to avoid showing those fins in ads and promo spots.

 

 

I saw an article that said the Orcas are in WAY too small pools; half their bodies are exposed to the sun, the water is so shallow, AND they get sunburned, and SeaWorld then PAINTS their injured parts to fool the public. :(

 

My attitude toward captive animals has changed dramatically over the years.  I just can't bear it anymore.

[xls]

I saw an article that said the Orcas are in WAY too small pools; half their bodies are exposed to the sun, the water is so shallow, AND they get sunburned, and SeaWorld then PAINTS their injured parts to fool the public. :(

 

My attitude toward captive animals has changed dramatically over the years.  I just can't bear it anymore.

Mine too. As a child I enjoyed the zoo (Cleveland) which had, at the time, more spacious enclosures, but still its a life sentence in prison with crowds of noisy people staring at you all day. Animals like orcas and elephants need an area of hundreds or thousands of square miles, no wonder they go insane and kill trainers.

Seaworld is never going to recover from Blackfish. 

[Archery]

Those Kevin Spacey E Trade commercials are nonsensical and make me want to push him and his smug pseudo-House of Cards drawl in front of a subway train.

[Sandman87]

Seaworld is never going to recover from Blackfish.

(Insert obligatory joke about the Game of Thrones character here.)

[Moose135]

YES, and this is how I feel about foglights. This is Charlotte, FFS, not the West Virginia Appalachians. I can't see with your lights in my eyes!!

Hey, I live in Charlotte, and I always use the fog lights on my Hummer...

 

No, not really - I do live in Charlotte, but I have a Durango, and I've only use the fog lights up on the Blue Ridge Parkway, when it wasn't so much foggy, more like the mountains were in the clouds.  I hate people that run with on them all the time.

[Prevailing Wind]

My Honda Fit has fog lights that are very low and mostly point off to the sides.  Fog lights aren't supposed to annoy other drivers, are they?

[bubbls]

I've yet to catch it visually, but there is some annoying commercial with a woman wailing "I just wanna make love to you!!!!!!" at the top of her lungs. Since I can reasonably assume this isn't a commercial for porn or some matchmaking service...wait, it might be a matchmaking service.....my next assumption is she's singing it to an inanimate object in which case it is......gross. My guess is it's a chocolate bar. 

[mojoween]

So Caroline from eharmony has a little buddy named Chase who is also unintelligible. I still don't understand why CHILDREN are being used to hawk a dating site.

Anyways that's not why I'm here. It's yet another disclaimer that drives me batshit. Two little kids decide to get dinner for mom and dad. So they hook a wagon up to a trike or bike or whatever and head down to the KFC drive-thru. Mom and dad come home and voila! Dinner is served.

When the kids are heading off down the road and get to the drive-thru the disclaimer says "Do not attempt."

Well for fuck's sake, KFC. Why the hell are you showing this heart-warming little tale if you don't want anyone to actually DO it? I mean, the only way it can be done is if the kids get the food themselves, and it's not like they can DRIVE to do it.

Stupid ad that makes me hate you and your copywriters.

Edited April 27, 2015 by mojoween

[bubbls]

So Caroline from eharmony has a little buddy named Chase who is also unintelligible. I still don't understand why CHILDREN are being used to hawk a dating site.

 

 

 

Eww, that one squicks me out. 

[DeLurker]

Xfinity's commercial about how no one will help you move, makes me bonkers.

 

If I wait to the day I am packing up my household to call my friends to help me move that day, I deserve to be turned down, lied to or sent to voicemail.  IRL my friends would call be a dumb ass for waiting until the last minute in hopes that someone would be available.

[90PercentGravity]

I wish Jeep would quit putting that "hey, hey, hey" song in my head. I can't even understand the damn words. "Living a life to relegate," what does that have to do with Jeep?

Edited April 27, 2015 by 90PercentGravity

[Moose135]

I wish Jeep would quit putting that "hey, hey, hey" song in my head. I can't even understand the damn words. "Living a life to relegate," what does that have to do with Jeep?

 

"Living like we're renegades" - it's a commercial for the Jeep Renegade...

[SmithW6079]

So Caroline from eharmony has a little buddy named Chase who is also unintelligible. I still don't understand why CHILDREN are being used to hawk a dating site.

 

"Will you be my new daddy/mommy?"

 

I could see WiFi in the car, in this circumstance: I use the GPS on my phone (no Garmin or Tom Tom), so having WiFi would be useful instead of having to use data from my data plan.

[6 MeowMeowBeenz]

"Living a life to relegate,"

 

Bwah! Sounds like a 'kissthisguy" kind of posting!

 

I think the Renegade will sell pretty well but despite, instead of because of, those commercials. When you are trying to convince people something's cool, then by definition it isn't. Hipster backlash gonna backlash. 

[DeLurker]

Anyways that's not why I'm here. It's yet another disclaimer that drives me batshit. Two little kids decide to get dinner for mom and dad. So they hook a wagon up to a trike or bike or whatever and head down to the KFC drive-thru. Mom and dad come home and voila! Dinner is served.

When the kids are heading off down the road and get to the drive-thru the disclaimer says "Do not attempt."

Well for fuck's sake, KFC. Why the hell are you showing this heart-warming little tale if you don't want anyone to actually DO it? I mean, the only way it can be done is if the kids get the food themselves, and it's not like they can DRIVE to do it.

Stupid ad that makes me hate you and your copywriters.

I'll join you in your hate.  I just saw that this morning.  The "Do Not Attempt" disclaimer is barely noticeable.

 

If my children did this, they would not see grateful Mom.  They'd be thisclose to getting a tanning even though I've never spanked my kids and in for a lecture/rant/rave of epic proportions.

[proserpina65]

I could see WiFi in the car, in this circumstance: I use the GPS on my phone (no Garmin or Tom Tom), so having WiFi would be useful instead of having to use data from my data plan.

 

Sure, but would you describe it as "The Dream"?

[Jamoche]

I could see WiFi in the car, in this circumstance: I use the GPS on my phone (no Garmin or Tom Tom), so having WiFi would be useful instead of having to use data from my data plan.

But the car Wifi needs its own separate data plan that costs about as much as a cheap home one.

[mojoween]

I'm wondering if you would just log in with your home wifi and password info? Kinda like when you use your phone hot spot?

[Ubiquitous]

Those Kevin Spacey E Trade commercials are nonsensical and make me want to push him and his smug pseudo-House of Cards drawl in front of a subway train.

Thank you for saving me the time and effort of submitting multiple complaints about those ads!

[xaxat]

Those Kevin Spacey E Trade commercials are nonsensical and make me want to push him and his smug pseudo-House of Cards drawl in front of a subway train.

 

Any brokerage ad that touts the "tools" or software that they provide to their customers annoys me.

 

Investment bankers and mutual/ hedge fund managers with supercomputers supported by PhD economists, mathematicians and computer scientists suck at beating the market, so there is no chance software that runs on a Windows 7 box can provide you with a real advantage.

Edited April 27, 2015 by xaxat

[Actionmage]

The TV was on and I wasn't paying much attention when I heard the phrase " for the inevitable mess."

 

No.

 

There may be messes. You may have small children, animals of various types, or adults that are klutzy. You are aware of those factors and plan how to minimize "mess." Not chiseled in stone. Not set on a whiteboard in the kitchen or wherever. Just, 'if X happens, then... ."

 

I have a slightly klutzy husband, as am I. We have two small pets. We have messes, from time to time. They are not "inevitable".

[amass]

Xfinity's commercial about how no one will help you move, makes me bonkers.

 

If I wait to the day I am packing up my household to call my friends to help me move that day, I deserve to be turned down, lied to or sent to voicemail.  IRL my friends would call be a dumb ass for waiting until the last minute in hopes that someone would be available.

I hate that one too. It bugs me more because xfinity isn't helping you move, they're just hooking up your cable and internet. If the commercial was for a moving company then I'd get it...but as it stands now asking your friends to help you move and calling the cable company because you're moving are two different things.

[Rick Kitchen]

There's an ad for some college where a professor says, "I know for a fact that all of my students are going to have problems in the future."  Fuck you, you don't know that for a fact.  You just assume it, and what you're assuming is that everybody who ever went through your class is a failure of some kind.

Edited April 28, 2015 by Rick Kitchen

[potatoradio]

I think the Renegade will sell pretty well but despite, instead of because of, those commercials. When you are trying to convince people something's cool, then by definition it isn't. Hipster backlash gonna backlash

I absolutely hate how Jeep commercials (and some other Amurrrcan car models) always have to show their car driving over/tearing up what looks like a lovely forest or park just because they can. Hey, you f*ckwit, are you driving to a medical emergency? Are you passed out at the wheel? If not, stay on the g*damned road/path. It's good enough for the rest of us, it's good enough for you and far better for the planet, mmmkay? You are not a freedom-loving renegade. You're an idiot and I hate sharing this planet with you and I ain't buying what you're selling.

[LoneHaranguer]

 

Investment bankers and mutual/ hedge fund managers with supercomputers supported by PhD economists, mathematicians and computer scientists suck at beating the market, so there is no chance software that runs on a Windows 7 box can provide you with a real advantage.

Sure it can; you're not trying to buy or sell millions of shares at a time. But, all the brokers are adding over what's available on other web sites is an easy way to place an order before you've thought it through, so you're better off with the other sites.

 

 

There's an ad for some college where a professor says, "I know for a fact that all of my students are going to have problems in the future."  Fuck, you don't know that for a fact.

He might if he knows he sucks at teaching and his class is important to the careers of his students.

[90PercentGravity]

Maybe he is talking about math problems.

[mojoween]

I hate the word vaping. It sounds ridiculous and when I hear the deep-voiced VO guy say it, it sounds like an entirely less pleasant word.

Edited April 28, 2015 by mojoween

[Rick Kitchen]

I hate the word vaping. It sounds ridiculous and when I hear the deep-voiced VO guy say it, it sounds like an entirely less pleasant word.

Vaping is the word of the year as chosen last year by the editors of the Oxford English Dictionary.  It's a valid term.

[mojoween]

No.

Well now I'm disappointed in the OED. It's shorthand, is it not? Regardless, it's a horrible word, IMO.

[pandora spocks]

Seriously, Botox, don't you make enough money from aging starlets? Now Botox is being promoted for leaky bladders and migraines. Shame on them for being the whores of the pharmaceutical world!

[Brattinella]

There is a local ad here that has a guy vaping, and he is blowing the most obnoxiously huge clouds of vapor.  Come on, man, the point of this vaping thing is that you can do it in public and NOT be offensive.

[Lola16]

There's an ad for some college where a professor says, "I know for a fact that all of my students are going to have problems in the future."  Fuck you, you don't know that for a fact.  You just assume it, and what you're assuming is that everybody who ever went through your class is a failure of some kind.

Is it the prof from Texas A&M? 

[Rick Kitchen]

No, it's Azusa Pacific University.

[bilgistic]

I hate "vaping". In a shopping center I frequent, there's a store named "Mad Vapes". So much hate.

[DeLurker]

Is it the prof from Texas A&M? 

Sadly that guy is real.

[Tunia]

Seriously, Botox, don't you make enough money from aging starlets? Now Botox is being promoted for leaky bladders and migraines. Shame on them for being the whores of the pharmaceutical world!

 

It's really the other way around...Botox was originally intended for medical purposes (calming bladder spasms, blocking nerve pain, muscle difficulties, etc.), but was later highjacked for cosmetic use.  Its medical usage is considered to be very effective for many disorders.

Edited April 28, 2015 by Tunia

[CoderLady]

It's really the other way around...Botox was originally intended for medical purposes (calming bladder spasms, blocking nerve pain, muscle difficulties, etc.), but was later highjacked for cosmetic use.

 

Wow - I was typing a response that was almost word-for-word just what you said. Years ago I needed an injection to fix an eye muscle problem and it worked. Amazing stuff, trivialized by being used to freeze perfectly healthy face muscles.

[Ubiquitous]

I hate the word vaping. It sounds ridiculous and when I hear the deep-voiced VO guy say it, it sounds like an entirely less pleasant word.

What tehell is "vaping"?

[Rick Kitchen]

What tehell is "vaping"?

 

The word for smoking an e-cigarette.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

I hate the word vaping. It sounds ridiculous and when I hear the deep-voiced VO guy say it, it sounds like an entirely less pleasant word.

 

I had to Google that, and wow, really? WTF impression are they trying to make?

[merylinkid]

Vaping is a stupid word.   Just because the OED chose it does not make it a good word.   I love the OED, but here they were freaking wrong.

[Brattinella]

Well, what word would you suggest as an alternative?  A word meaning "using a e-cigarette".  Certainly not SMOKING.  How about "e-cigging"?

[Watcher0363]

Vaping is probably the most appropriate term. In the west we would say you are inhaling vapor. However most of the world would say it as the vapor for inhaling. Or vapor inhaling. So vaping sounds about right. At least I think I have my noun verb adjective thing right for the Romance languages.

[Aquarius]

I hate "vaping". In a shopping center I frequent, there's a store named "Mad Vapes". So much hate.

 

Yeah, in my downtown a shop opened called "Mama Vapes."  HAATE!

[Prevailing Wind]

"Vapor inhaling" sounds like you've been using Vicks Vap-O-Rub on your chest.

[proserpina65]

There's an ad for some college where a professor says, "I know for a fact that all of my students are going to have problems in the future."  Fuck you, you don't know that for a fact.  You just assume it, and what you're assuming is that everybody who ever went through your class is a failure of some kind.

I haven't seen the ad, so I don't know if it's refering to something college-specific (or maybe it's implying that they'll have problems getting jobs after college), but it's pretty much guaranteed that everyone will have some sort of problem at some point in their adult lives, probably many, many times before they die.

Vaping is the word of the year as chosen last year by the editors of the Oxford English Dictionary.  It's a valid term.

Doesn't mean it isn't a stupid word, though.

[xls]

I haven't seen the ad, so I don't know if it's refering to something college-specific (or maybe it's implying that they'll have problems getting jobs after college), but it's pretty much guaranteed that everyone will have some sort of problem at some point in their adult lives, probably many, many times before they die.

Doesn't mean it isn't a stupid word, though.

I hate the word "bliss". Every time I hear it I think of Ann the alien from V.