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Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage


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I don't care to hear Marie Osmond talk about being 50 pounds over weight, and it being the worst day of her life.  She has had worse days.  With a personal chef, personal trainer etc... losing 50 pounds for her is pretty easy.

Most annoying ad ever.

Yeah, I always thought finding out her son committed suicide would have been a worse day.

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Yeah, the commercials are weirdly written... I mean, she gained the weight during the period of her life when horrible things were happening to her. But that time wasn't horrible because of the weight. It sort of went the other way 'round I think.

 

It sort of reflects how she's basically...always been a professional personality her whole life. Like, if I were a famous person spokespersoning something, I would object to them having me say that sort of line knowing that the public knows some of the major horrible things that had happened to me in the past. But maybe she had no say in the text, and didn't put up much of or enough of a fight to change it and just went with it cuz a gig's a gig. Their family always struck me that way, a bit. One-take Osmonds and all. She's just...saying a line because it's her job to do so.

Edited by theatremouse
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So basically, a woman who doesn't know you will have random sex with you if you would only use just for men on your beard!  Now you know men, now you know.  Women don't really want a sense of humor, rock hard abs, or intelligent conversation....what we really want is a guy with a non gray beard!  And I mean, we really, really want that....its a necessary and sufficient condition to having sex with us.

 

Actually...

 

 

NSFW, so use your headphones.

 

 

a sexy push to spread congealed oil on my muffin

I can't believe nobody commented on this! Yes, I'm 12.

 

I didn't even notice it until you pointed it out, fourmfish. Now I can't stop snickering. Because I am also twelve.

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I can't believe nobody commented on this! Yes, I'm 12.

 

Revisiting the online dating ads from upthread, the ones for Christian Mingle irritate me -- not only are they telling me (as a Christian single woman) that I have to meet "God's match" for me, but they go so far as to speak for God? I'm thinking that doesn't please Him too much.

 

This has bothered me for so long.  I'm glad it annoys someone else.  "God is telling you", indeed!

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With the pig, the "well did you know...", Flo, the State Farm "school" etc. insurance companies sure don't know when to move on with their campaign themes, imo.  Do they really think yet another increasingly creepy "Flo" ad is going to push enough customers to switching that otherwise wouldn't?  "Oh my gawd Henry its a new Flo ad, call already!"

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Am I the only one who gets irritated by the implication that being in the Army Reserves is so kick-ass awesome that it runs rings around any of your boring 9-to-5 jobs?*

 

And as an aside, I see that they've resumed using the "One weekend a month, two weeks a year" tagline.

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Am I the only one who gets irritated by the implication that being in the Army Reserves is so kick-ass awesome that it runs rings around any of your boring 9-to-5 jobs?*

 

And as an aside, I see that they've resumed using the "One weekend a month, two weeks a year" tagline.

Well, it would certainly run rings around mine! lol

I thought the National Guard was the "one weekend a month, two weeks a year" people. Shows how closely I watch these things.

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You guys read the story behind the creepy Trivago guy, right? Apparently he plays an American rock star on a German soap opera. He's supposedly considered super sexy in Germany, and the people that run Trivago (can't remember if they're German or from a nearby country) sought him out. They were really surprised that American audiences didn't swoon over him.

So once they realized, they took advantage of a bad situation and had a contest to make him over. I read an interview with the actor, who said he thought he was just fine but who wouldn't love a free makeover? That he seemed so laid-back and cool about it made me like him.

They just recently announced the makeover contest winner, so I'm guessing we'll see ads with the new and improved Trivago guy soon.

I have to admit, the way that the company handled the negative reaction, kind of made it into a joke on themselves we were all in on, has made the company seem far more attractive to me.

Hey, I liked Trivago guy, scruffy and/or cleaned up/made over. I think he's Canadian, eh???? Sad, sexy eyes.

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Am I the only one who gets irritated by the implication that being in the Army Reserves is so kick-ass awesome that it runs rings around any of your boring 9-to-5 jobs?*

 

And as an aside, I see that they've resumed using the "One weekend a month, two weeks a year" tagline.

.....right up until its not

 

 

a sexy push to spread congealed oil on my muffin

 

FORUMFISH, ON 23 NOV 2014 - 7:42 PM, SAID:

I can't believe nobody commented on this! Yes, I'm 12.

 

I didn't even notice it until you pointed it out, fourmfish. Now I can't stop snickering. Because I am also twelve.

 

heh, I'm 12 too!

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OMG! The "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" guy is Christian Grey?!? *fans herself* And I haven't even made it to books 2 and 3 yet.

 

No.  There was an online "movement" by his fans to get him to play Christian Grey.  But that role went to Charlie Hunnam.   And then to Jamie Dornan when Charlie backed out. 

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So glad at least the Army got rid of the "Army of one" tagline.   That was just stupid.    An army by definition means more than 1.    WHY they decided to drop their most popular tagline "Be all you can be ... in the Army" is as baffling as new coke or the Sprint Framily where the dad was a hamster.

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So glad at least the Army got rid of the "Army of one" tagline.   That was just stupid.    An army by definition means more than 1.    WHY they decided to drop their most popular tagline "Be all you can be ... in the Army" is as baffling as new coke or the Sprint Framily where the dad was a hamster.

I was driving a month ago,and saw a billboard "The US Marines.....Respecting (or Representing) Hispanic Values"  with a picture of a marine in dress uniform. I kid you not.  I was so confused.  I get that they were trying to recruit, but it wasn't even inspirational, and it read pretty racist to me.  All Hispanics don't have the same values any more than all white or black people have the same values.  I wish I could have taken a picture because I found it so odd, but I was on a freeway, and it just didn't seem worth it.

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as baffling as new coke

Years ago, I read that New Coke came along just after Robert Woodruff (the main guy) had died.  The story was he had the secret formula & it died with him, so they came up with Joke Coke while they tried to figure out the classic formula.  I never believed it, but I'm more than willing to believe Joke Coke was to distract us while they replaced the cane sugar with corn syrup in the Classic version.

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Years ago, I read that New Coke came along just after Robert Woodruff (the main guy) had died.  The story was he had the secret formula & it died with him, so they came up with Joke Coke while they tried to figure out the classic formula.  I never believed it, but I'm more than willing to believe Joke Coke was to distract us while they replaced the cane sugar with corn syrup in the Classic version.

My mother took one taste of "Classic" Coke and swore it wasn't the same. It later came out that it wasn't the same sugar and Mom could taste the difference.

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Hey, I liked Trivago guy, scruffy and/or cleaned up/made over. I think he's Canadian, eh???? Sad, sexy eyes.

He's German.

I was driving a month ago,and saw a billboard "The US Marines.....Respecting (or Representing) Hispanic Values"  with a picture of a marine in dress uniform. I kid you not.  I was so confused.  I get that they were trying to recruit, but it wasn't even inspirational, and it read pretty racist to me.  All Hispanics don't have the same values any more than all white or black people have the same values.  I wish I could have taken a picture because I found it so odd, but I was on a freeway, and it just didn't seem worth it.

I had the same reaction to the US Navy slogan: "A force for good"

What, do people think America is Evil?

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I think the best matchmaking ad was actually that one for a phone company where a clueless single dad's daughters were fixing him up. The ones for dating sites always leave me cold.

 

I can't stand the Honeybaked Ham commercial. The guy at the end says "It's better than the ham your momma made." It just annoys me because 1) the tastiness of the Honeybaked ham has dIminished in recent years, and 2) he's a traiterous arse to all Black cooks in America. He's let down the legacy. And he draws it out as if he's saying the dopest thing ever. 

Yeah, I'm gonna go with not damn likely unless Honeybaked Ham has a woman in her 70s lovingly braising those hams for six hours in the back. They'd have better luck selling to me if they just said they're not undercooked and you can actually tell the meat originated from an animal at some point instead of being slices of compressed meat by-product like ham in the deli section of most grocery stores.

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My mother took one taste of "Classic" Coke and swore it wasn't the same. It later came out that it wasn't the same sugar and Mom could taste the difference.

 

My grandfather still swears they changed the formula when they "brought it back".  His grandfather was some muckity muck at the company though right before he retired so maybe he is on to something.  Then again this is the same man who voted for Ross Perot.  Twice. 

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This commercial doesn't annoy, irritate or enrage me but at first I thought it was a joke. When I realized it was real, I couldn't stop laughing.

OMG, this commercial is a gem!  So many wonderful things:

 

1. Why is he suddenly using "farmer tinder" when his friends start talking about a fish?  That seems kind of rude.  The fish debate seemed compelling.

 

2. How big was this fish?

 

3. Why is someone taking a picture of this womans ass while she is fishing?

 

4. Dating sites are normally show the "ideal" mate, Mom shorts and a pulled up tee shirt are the ideal woman?

 

5. Is there anything to do in this town but fish?  Everyone is fishing or talking about fish.

 

6. Dude's friend seems super confused about a smart phone, but then pulls out a laptop, seemingly from nowhere, say what?

 

7. What is that chick doing with the fishing pole, I don't even fish, but I know she isn't holding it right.

 

8. They do realize there is an intermediate step between looking at a girl online and actually running off to date her, right?  Or is he going to kidnap her?  Or are all country girls this fast?

 

9. I love that the dog is the smartest one in the conversation.

 

10.  I also love that they leave us with at least one cliffhanger.....how is the guy in the suspenders ever going to find his nice country girl?

 

11.  And finally, I must say I love the wrap up line "City Folk Just Don't Get It!"  Nope, we sure don't!

My grandfather still swears they changed the formula when they "brought it back".  His grandfather was some muckity muck at the company though right before he retired so maybe he is on to something.  Then again this is the same man who voted for Ross Perot.  Twice. 

Well, he clearly watched those infomercials.  They had graphs and everything!

Edited by RealityGal
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At least with the eharmony dude, it is set up so that these single people are approaching him in most commercials. Match.com guy is just seeking out the poor lonely singles (heavy sarcasm here people)on the f'ing STREET and badgering them into joining.

 

I can't be the only one who saw this commercial for the first time and thought, "Are these two guys going to hook up  . . . with each other???" I mean, some random dude sits down on a park bench and starts asking another dude he doesn't even know about his dating habits? If I were that dude I'd think this guy was hitting on me.

 

Revisiting the online dating ads from upthread, the ones for Christian Mingle irritate me -- not only are they telling me (as a Christian single woman) that I have to meet "God's match" for me, but they go so far as to speak for God? I'm thinking that doesn't please Him too much.

 

The thing that cracks me up about these ads is their audacity to imply their website somehow divines God's perfect match for you, yet at the same time, their tagline is something along the lines of "Because sometimes, God just wants you to get up off your ass and find your own damn mate."

 

I just saw the Honda Stretch Armstrong ad. Why is he sniffing his arrmpits at the end?

 

He's not, he's kissing his biceps. Which some bodybuilders actually do.

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I had the same reaction to the US Navy slogan: "A force for good"

What, do people think America is Evil?

There are multiple terrorist organizations, foreign governments (like Russia), and (depending on your political persuasions) Americans, that would say "yes, America is evil."

 

The thing that cracks me up about these ads is their audacity to imply their website somehow divines God's perfect match for you, yet at the same time, their tagline is something along the lines of "Because sometimes, God just wants you to get up off your ass and find your own damn mate."

 

No, I think it's just that there is a dating site for Christians who want to meet other Christians, and "God helps those who help themselves." Are JDate or "Black People Meet" any different for those who want to meet someone for the same religious or ethnic heritage?

Edited by SmithW6079
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My grandfather still swears they changed the formula when they "brought it back". His grandfather was some muckity muck at the company though right before he retired so maybe he is on to something. Then again this is the same man who voted for Ross Perot. Twice.

They did change the formula. They switched the sweetener from sugar to high fructose corn syrup.

Edited by BrokenRemote
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There are multiple terrorist organizations, foreign governments (like Russia), and (depending on your political persuasions) Americans, that would say "yes, America is evil."

Well, I wasn't going to go there... ;-)

I noticed they're running those ads for oranges with bratty kids again.

Edited by Ubiquitous
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While the two douchenozzles in the Sonic ads continue to annoy to no end....

 

Checkers has a new ad campaign out featuring a talking paper sack hawking their disgusting, mass-produced garbage and ending its spiel with the new slogan, "It's in the BAG!!".  

 

I have a hunch that the stupid thing is a relative of the obnoxious talking box from the Progressive commercials as it has the same overbearing, self-important attitude.  Hell, their voices are even similar.

 

******

 

I haven't seen this one on TV, but when I'm streaming live television on my computer, several of the stations are running a new ad for Old Navy featuring Amy Poehler.  In it she's (badly) doing a parody of Katy Perry/Lady GaGa/Beyonce rehearsing a stage performance, complete with annoying-as-fuck-all electronica.

 

The fucking thing sends me into fits of rage as I cannot stand Amy Poehler - she works my last nerve as I don't find her to be funny or entertaining in the least, and her numerous Old Navy ads are painful to watch.  Also, Comcast runs this ad during every. single. commercial. break., and for some ungodly reason, the volume for it is twice as loud as the shows being streamed, forcing me to stop whatever I'm reading or typing and turn the volume down to almost nothing.  If I'm wearing my earbuds, it's even worse because the THUMP-THUMP-THUMP of the drum machine and synthesizer that occurs at the very start of the thing damn near busts my eardrums.

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I finally saw a FarmersOnly commercial yesterday or today when I was at my sister's in Georgia. The "lonely single" woman in the ad was wandering through a field of dead corn (symbolic?). I don't remember what the lonely single man was doing, but he may have been fishing. The graphics were straight out of Windows 95 and Microsoft Powerpoint with the cursed Comic Sans font. I laughed and laughed, thinking of this thread, and my family just looked at me kind of quizzically.

The ad upthread is quite a step up from the one I saw.

Edited by bilgistic
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I finally saw a FarmersOnly commercial yesterday or today when I was at my sister's in Georgia. The "lonely single" woman in the ad was wandering through a field of dead corn (symbolic?). I don't remember what the lonely single man was doing, but he may have been fishing. The graphics were straight out of Windows 95 and Microsoft Powerpoint with the cursed Comic Sans font.

 

He was out feeding his talking cows...

 

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This commercial for Ally Bank, implying that a customer who questions their bank's policies are just dimwitted.  This one says Hidden fees?  Why are you afraid of that? (not in those exact words, but implied) There is another one that says "Why are you afraid of trying new things?" 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPWfgsESlG4

I usually like Ally's ads.  The hidden fees one, cracks me up when that animal (what is it, a red panda?) lands on the guy's face.  But the message makes no sense.  Ally is trying to get over that they have no hidden fees so why would the rep grill the guy on it?

 

You guys read the story behind the creepy Trivago guy, right? Apparently he plays an American rock star on a German soap opera. He's supposedly considered super sexy in Germany, and the people that run Trivago (can't remember if they're German or from a nearby country) sought him out. They were really surprised that American audiences didn't swoon over him.

So once they realized, they took advantage of a bad situation and had a contest to make him over. I read an interview with the actor, who said he thought he was just fine but who wouldn't love a free makeover? That he seemed so laid-back and cool about it made me like him.

They just recently announced the makeover contest winner, so I'm guessing we'll see ads with the new and improved Trivago guy soon.

I have to admit, the way that the company handled the negative reaction, kind of made it into a joke on themselves we were all in on, has made the company seem far more attractive to me.

His torso is unusually long for his height.  And he's weird looking.  He looks more like a Viagra or Ciallis candidate.  I remember seeing a new ad and thinking, this make-over isn't working.  Too funny that it was intentional due to viewer reaction.

 

I hate the drambuie commercial with the blonde at the drums. Hate. I just do not get it.

They're kinda late to the Mad Men party, aren't they?  Her bad posture annoys me.  I get more of a AbFab vibe than I do Nancy Sinatra.

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I'm up too late again watching tv, and there have been several sex ads on that really do offend me. Not offended by sex, just the ads, especially for phone sex. The ads show a hot, sexy babe, clad in scanty lingerie, writhing all over the furniture. Do guys really think this is who they are going to talk dirty with? Years ago, don't even remember where I saw it, there was a phone sex worker talking dirty while she was ironing. That's what I think of when I see the ads. Also saw something with women in office cubicles. 

 

On the other hand, I crack up with the first Dyson vacuum guy says "suction".

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I had a friend that did phone sex when she was a single mom with a new baby.  She said the hardest part of the job was keeping the crying baby from being heard by the customers.  She also said it was, by far, the sleaziest thing she'd ever done, but she needed to pay the rent.  She also said she had a lot of repeat customers because "I give good phone." She was very glad when she could get a real job.

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Years ago, don't even remember where I saw it, there was a phone sex worker talking dirty while she was ironing. That's what I think of when I see the ads.

I wanna say that was Sisters, although I'm not sure why anyone on Sisters would have been doing phone sex.  Anyway, that's exactly what I think of when I see phone sex ads also.

Edited by janie jones
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So, the online Dominos order mascot is a version of Clippy? Hi, I'm Dom! Six pizzas? Sounds like a party!

No, Dom, I'm a compulsive overeater and am going on a binge while watching Lifetime movies in my basement. A little less commentary, a little less character, please. Just take my order and die.

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I'm up too late again watching tv, and there have been several sex ads on that really do offend me. Not offended by sex, just the ads, especially for phone sex. The ads show a hot, sexy babe, clad in scanty lingerie, writhing all over the furniture. Do guys really think this is who they are going to talk dirty with? Years ago, don't even remember where I saw it, there was a phone sex worker talking dirty while she was ironing. That's what I think of when I see the ads. Also saw something with women in office cubicles. 

 

On the other hand, I crack up with the first Dyson vacuum guy says "suction".

Sounds like the Aerosmith Sweet Emotion video

 

 

Go to 4:25 of the video.

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My first thought was also of the Sweet Emotion video. I think there have been multiple other television references to the hot phone sex babe turning out to be an overweight, unattractive woman in curlers and a mumu. Fairly certain the Simpsons had something similar, although I'm drawing a blank off the top of my head and don't really want to start googling phone sex references on my work laptop.

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One of the ads was from JetDoll and the other had sex or sexy in the title. I wasn't watching adult movies - I was watching Mythbusters, which is about the most unsexy show on television. But I do think Jamie Hineman is just about as sexy as a man can be, he doesn't throw it out in front of our faces, it's his intelligence, humor and soft spoken manner, things that get my attention every time. Well...there was one show where they were exploring sex related myths.

 

Edited to add, ff through the video, and laughed, just what I pictured.

Edited by friendperidot
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So, the online Dominos order mascot is a version of Clippy? Hi, I'm Dom! Six pizzas? Sounds like a party!

No, Dom, I'm a compulsive overeater and am going on a binge while watching Lifetime movies in my basement. A little less commentary, a little less character, please. Just take my order and die.

I hate that ad. It truly is like Clippy, except it also listens in on you as part of obtrusively interrupting you with unwanted pizza-related advice.

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So, the online Dominos order mascot is a version of Clippy? Hi, I'm Dom! Six pizzas? Sounds like a party!

No, Dom, I'm a compulsive overeater and am going on a binge while watching Lifetime movies in my basement. A little less commentary, a little less character, please. Just take my order and die.

Where does the Noid fit into all of this?

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Please go away Smokey the Bear and stop hugging people in the forest.  There's too many of your ads and they play constantly over and over and over.  I want to set you on fire just so I never see you again.

 

/end rant

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The Hardees/Carl Jr's "mile high burger" commercial offends me on several levels - it celebrates rampant gluttony, features a porn starlet version of a stewardess popping out of her barely there uniform as she eats a burger, and uses that awful "Like a G6" song that I'd hoped had been lost forever to oblivion. Any one of the three on its own would be enough to make me change channels, but combined they're a perfect storm of offensiveness memorable enough that I feel certain I'll never eat at one of those restaurants.

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