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Michelle and JimBob aka J'Chelle and Boob


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Closure Notice: This Thread is now closed due to the name (and much of the posting within it). Please be mindful going forward by naming topics in a way that invites a healthy community conversation. If you name something for a cheap laugh, this thread may be closed later because it encourages discrimination and harm. 

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I think Michelle was using her weird preschool teacher voice so the 911 operator wouldn't have any trouble understanding what she was saying over the phone. It's the voice she uses when she wants to make it unambiguously clear to Josie or Jackson "it's not your turn to play with the toy" etc.

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Michelle is a nut. I totally agree that she had a breakdown at some point and this is as good as she can get. The baby voice is the result of her breakdown.

But for Michelle, who really is crazy, she was fine on the 911 call because she got the job done. Got/gave info and got her daughter an ambulance.

Better than when the J boy fell down the orchestra pit.

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Michelle is a nut. I totally agree that she had a breakdown at some point and this is as good as she can get. The baby voice is the result of her breakdown.

But for Michelle, who really is crazy, she was fine on the 911 call because she got the job done. Got/gave info and got her daughter an ambulance.

Better than when the J boy fell down the orchestra pit.

I agree. Michelle was weird but effective on the 911 call. She clearly conveyed the key words "mother is bleeding after birth" to the 911 operator ASAP.

As an Internet armchair psychiatrist, I still say she's clinically fucked in the head.

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I think Michelle had that breakdown with the laundry and that was the first wave of her problems.

I think loosing Jubilee and not having another child has really ramped up whatever mental health problems she already had. Now she has really lost it.

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Michelle is a nut. I totally agree that she had a breakdown at some point and this is as good as she can get. The baby voice is the result of her breakdown.

But for Michelle, who really is crazy, she was fine on the 911 call because she got the job done. Got/gave info and got her daughter an ambulance.

Better than when the J boy fell down the orchestra pit.

 

I agree... I kinda hate to defend Michelle but I've had to make an emergency call recently for my Mom and my gut wanted to scream "my Mommy can't breathe help us!!!!" but something else prevailed and I was able to freakishly calmly tell them about her status, address, whether or not she was turning blue (?!?) etc. Michelle was probably pretty concerned about Jessa and/or on some things to deal with Josh-gate. I still think she's completely nuts, but I thought she did a fairly ok job on that call.

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I think Michelle was using her weird preschool teacher voice so the 911 operator wouldn't have any trouble understanding what she was saying over the phone. It's the voice she uses when she wants to make it unambiguously clear to Josie or Jackson "it's not your turn to play with the toy" etc.

Maybe that is the voice she uses when she is being filmed/recorded. She probably thinks it is an improvement over her real voice. 

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All I can think of is JB and Michelle steal another one of the babies.  He is getting attention after all- so they want in. For now. While 'counting on is being filmed'. And how is that kid supposed to nurse if Jessa is at the hospital and baby is at the compound?

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All I can think of is JB and Michelle steal another one of the babies.  He is getting attention after all- so they want in. For now. While 'counting on is being filmed'. And how is that kid supposed to nurse if Jessa is at the hospital and baby is at the compound?

 

I'm thinking that the baby is at the hospital as well, as a visitor.  He'll most likely stay there when Jessa is well enough, along with a constant rotating group of visitors.

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I woke up this morning and realized I had been dreaming, for some time, "Mooooooooother..............Is................Bleeeeeeeeeeeeding......................Affffffffffffter........Birth".

Wouldn't it be more common, or normal, to just say my daughter has just had a baby, at home, and is bleeding excessively.

Edited by louannems
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I'm thinking she pulled out those words to show off her extensive knowledge re: birthin' the babies.

Kind of a HailMary, We do too know what we're doing!

But agree that most 911ers would stick with your, My daughter just had a baby etc. etc.

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I think the midwife told Michelle to say those particular words.

Still, the way the pitch of Michelle's voice spiraled/glissando'd octaves higher on the "ing" in "bleeding" is bizarre.

Edited by Kokapetl
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My MIL taught kindergarden for 35 years and did tend to over explain and speak slowly in a calm, quiet almost babyish voice.  Drove me nuts.  But when she attempted to explain autism as "more than r*******" to me, a Psych grad student, I kinda cracked.

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So menopause. Menopause is an appropriate form of birth control because it occurs naturally? Aren't our brains natural too? Why don't the Duggars see thinking as a gift from God too?

Your comment leads me to an interesting question - one that I don't think the Duggars have ever addressed, nor has Gothard, and, because of the implications, will probably never be answered...

 

If Michelle is really done with the "season of life" where she's fertile, and menopause has finally put an end to her days of popping out blessings, does that mean that sex is no longer on the table ? Because sex is for procreation only, or however they say it ? 

 

Not that this is MY point of view, of course ! I'm all for the sexy time regardless of age or views on procreation ! I'm the one with the boyfriend that's 12 years younger than me, so...  ;)

 

But seriously...is the bump-and-grind over because there won't be any more babies ? 

 

I really can't see JimBoob ever, ever adhering to that kind of rule. I'm positive that there is some kind of special Gothard dispensation that allows the headship to "avail" himself of the helpmeet because, men. They have needs, y'all. Just like, uh...Jesus said. Or something. 

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I'm sure that wives must continue to submit as long as their headship has a sex drive. Boob will suck down Viagara by the bottlefull to put on the "virile man" front for many years to come. Mechelle's hooha has to be so stretched out that neither of them will notice when she inevitably dries up down there. 

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 ***

If Michelle is really done with the "season of life" where she's fertile, and menopause has finally put an end to her days of popping out blessings, does that mean that sex is no longer on the table ? Because sex is for procreation only, or however they say it ? 

 ***

No, I think there's a clear loophole here: You just have to promise to have as many babies as you can. After a certain age, that number is zero, hence the loophole. :-)

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Gothardites don't believe that sex is for procreation only actually. Sex is great and wonderful as long as it's heterosexual and married sex. Any other kind of sex is dirtybadwrong of course but as long as the family patriarch gets his, it's all good.

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Gothardites don't believe that sex is for procreation only actually. Sex is great and wonderful as long as it's heterosexual and married sex. Any other kind of sex is dirtybadwrong of course but as long as the family patriarch gets his, it's all good.

Why am I not surprised?

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I'm not sure where the right place is to ask this question so since its about the parents I'll ask here.

Sorry if this is a morbid question but what would happen within the family if Jim Bob died tomorrow?

What is the Gothard protocol for that? We know that in their minds a woman can't be the head if the household so what happens?

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I would assume that Josh would be the family headship as he is the oldest son. And the whole family would fall apart even faster than is happening now, not because Josh was in charge, but because I'm sure that while JB has taught the boys enough to get by while he's there still taking point, I'd bet he hasn't taught any of the boys everything they would need to know to run his business ventures and handle the finances without him, because as soon as another person knows all your methods and tricks you start to feel replaceable, and he's not ever going to let his boys feel like they can take his place.

Edited by kalamac
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And I'd be willing to bet that he doesn't have a stitch of life insurance - he's too cheap to pay the premiums. So Michelle would be left with nothing but their assets to provide for herself and however many children are dependent on her.

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Come 'n listen to my story 'bout a man named Jim Bob poor husband, barely kept his family fed And then one day, he was grifting for some food And around the bend come a television channel, TLC that is, reality gold, Arkansas dreams. Well, the first thing you know, old Jim Bob is a millionaire Kin folk said, Jim Bob, move away from there Said, Tontitown is the place you oughta be So they loaded up the Van and they moved to Tontitown that is, swimmin' holes, aluminum homes Well, now it's time to say goodbye to Jim Bob and all his kin They would like to thank you folks for kindly droppin' in You're all invited back again to this locality To have a heapin' helpin' of their hospitality Hillbilly, that is, set a spell, take your shoes off Y'all come back now, hear?

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And I'd be willing to bet that he doesn't have a stitch of life insurance - he's too cheap to pay the premiums. So Michelle would be left with nothing but their assets to provide for herself and however many children are dependent on her.

"Neddy doesn't believe in insurance.  He considers it a form of gambling." -- Maude Flanders

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I'll have that tune playing in my head for weeks, and never think of the Beverly Hillbillies without thinking of the idiot Duggars.

Bur the Hillbillies were good folks, unlike the Duggars who are all fire and brimstone.

I did one for Kris Jenner also, it's in the Keeping Up With The Kardashians - Kris: Pimp Momager

Edited by BrianJ62
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And I'd be willing to bet that he doesn't have a stitch of life insurance - he's too cheap to pay the premiums. So Michelle would be left with nothing but their assets to provide for herself and however many children are dependent on her.

I think they pretty much rely on that already.
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Here's a story, Of a lonely lady named Ruark, Who was not bringing up any children of her own. She had hair of red'ish. Here's a story, Of a lonely man named Duggar, Who had no children of his own (at least none that he knew of). They were two lonely people Living all alone,Till the one day when the lady met this fellow, And they knew it was much more tha n a hunch,That they might somehow form a giant 19+ children family.That's the way we all became the Duggar Bunch! The Duggar Bunch...The Duggar Bunch...That's the way we became the Duggar Bunch!

Edited by BrianJ62
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https://m.facebook.com/duggarfamilyofficial/photos/pb.510067475793573.-2207520000.1447389715./734017910065194/?type=3&source=54&refid=17

This breakfast really bothers me. Where are the wedding registry plates? And the fresh fruit? And the strange placement of the forks is just weird! Especially if your going to take a picture of breakfast and post it to all!

In some episode Michelle talks about writing the kid's names on the disposable plates. She inferred that it was to see who ate what, cleaned their plate and cleaned up etc. It was odd because we usually see them grazing.

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There are much nicer paper plates available.  They may cost a little more but you don't have to use 3 of them to keep the food from falling off the plate.  Nicer to look at too.

there ya go Micks, making sense again!  Not for the Duggars though.

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Plain omelette on a paper plate with a fork lying on top of it. Um. I'm not sure this meal is something I'd brag about making, especially not in public. Couldn't they have made just a little bit of effort if they were going to show off? Some colourful vegetables in the omelette, a couple of bacon slices, some juice, a nice napkin? If this is the extent of the tender loving care Jessa's recieving post-birth I pity the girl.

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For someone that claims to love the domestic life, Michelle is clueless. Try not to get any marker residue in your eggs, Jessa. Gross.

Michelle was never into being a "Betty Crocker."  You can just look at the recipes on her blog and see that.  She was never into home decorating or craft projects, either.  Before TLC, there wasn't room in their old house to even turn around let alone to think about decorating.

 

For 12 years she focused on the TLC gig.  Now that all of her speaking engagements are cancelled and the performances where all the kids had to line up, play their violins and sing, she's back to being a full-time mom.  I'll bet she is cracking up.

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