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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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This is less of a pet peeve than an outright complaint, but I am in the third day of a piriformis muscle spasm.  That means that the left side of my butt hurts, and has done so for going on three days now.  I want evolution to catch up to the sedentary human lifestyle and make the piriformis, which does not like to be sat on, less important.

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One pet peeve of mine is when you say just my opinion and someone quotes you that you are wrong.  

Work pet peeve when a customer asked you to check back room for product because the one the found was damage. You walk to the back room to search.  Find the item.  Bring it to costumer only for them to say "can you just mark this one down".  Just ask for the discount. 

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(edited)
9 hours ago, Popples said:

This used to enrage me on the now defunct IMDb boards. I kind of let it slide if they asked about someone who was in an episode of a TV show, because there can be loads of episodes and not everyone memorizes the episode names of shows. But, when people would go to the board of a film and say "who played so-and-so?" I would just sit stunned. Unless it was a tiny, un-credited role, it would be so much faster to just click on the "Full Cast" link and scroll until you see the character's name than it takes to type the question.

God damn, I miss the IMDb boards.  Yes, there were some idiots on there, but not all that many in discussions about foreign (non-U.S.) or independent movies.  The caliber of discussions on those was often incredibly high.

It got to where every time I'd come home from the show, the first thing I'd do was look up to see what people were saying about the movie.  I can't count the number of times I read something that enhanced what I'd just seen, or made me understand it better.

It was also great for filtering before ponying up for a ticket--you could ask if the Irish accents would be impenetrable, or exactly what kind of violence is depicted (I like mayhem, even involving gunplay, but not involving knives, and I can't stand to see torture of any kind).  I'm not averse to spoilers and it was a great place to be completely spoiled if you wanted.

Or you'd get people from whatever country a movie was made, and they'd explain some things that someone who's not from there wouldn't have any way of knowing.

It was the internet at its best, and it's gone.

Edited by StatisticalOutlier
the plural of "some thing" is not "somethings"
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23 minutes ago, stewedsquash said:

Then the poster does a complete turn around to make it seem like the suggestions are irrational or out of line. 

Heh. Fortunately that doesn't happen often enough for the good people to give up trying to help. But yes, that's awfully frustrating. Not everyone out here is rational. 

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18 hours ago, tribeca said:

One pet peeve of mine is when you say just my opinion and someone quotes you that you are wrong.  

That would bother me too, because you are clearly stating that what you are saying is your opinion, how you see it, and then you're judged wrong, even though what you said was clearly an opinion. If you had not so stated, I could possibly see them saying you're wrong, but to be judged that way for a clearly stated opinion (meaning that you say "this is my opinion" or words to that effect)-- that's way out of line. 

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1 hour ago, bmasters9 said:

That would bother me too, because you are clearly stating that what you are saying is your opinion, how you see it, and then you're judged wrong, even though what you said was clearly an opinion. If you had not so stated, I could possibly see them saying you're wrong, but to be judged that way for a clearly stated opinion (meaning that you say "this is my opinion" or words to that effect)-- that's way out of line. 

I agree. I used to post on a Missing Persons; forum. I'd say something was my opinion and I'd get a response like, "Do you have a link to that?" (to "prove " it?) Um.. no... :-) Peeve

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I'm peeved when someone on Facebook can't just offer sympathy for a loss, a crappy day, an illness - no, they have to outdo the poster by claiming their loss is more, their sickness is more severe or has lasted longer, or they're having the mother of all crappy days... IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. Just express your sympathies, commiseration or whatever and don't try to insert yourself into someone else's situation.

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Not just me - this same person stepped all over a friend's lamenting of the loss of 2 people close to her in the past weeks by noting that she lost her dog. I wanted to reach through the monitor and bitchslap her good.

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1 hour ago, riley702 said:

I'm peeved when someone on Facebook can't just offer sympathy for a loss, a crappy day, an illness - no, they have to outdo the poster by claiming their loss is more, their sickness is more severe or has lasted longer, or they're having the mother of all crappy days... IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. Just express your sympathies, commiseration or whatever and don't try to insert yourself into someone else's situation.

I have a friend who posts, on average, 9 memes per day, all of which vaguely and in some passive-aggressive way is supposed to tell you what's going on with her life and the trouble she's having with <insert noun(s)>. And all of this is without giving detail of any kind. I had to start clicking the option to block all posts from the pages she gets her memes in order to improve the signal:noise ratio. Now that I've done that, I see almost nothing she posts. So, I might as well have saved myself the trouble and just unfollowed her. The reason I didn't is because that feels like being friends with her on Facebook is pointless - and the main reason I'm on Facebook is to keep in touch with far-flung friends.

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(edited)

TV news shows who cut off/over-talk their guest's end-of-segment "You're welcome."  So rude.  Another one is when the host says "Do you mind sticking around for the next segment?" and the answer is yes, I always hear "Yes, I do mind," i.e. I have to go now.  

Edited by navelgazer
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On 3/23/2017 at 11:51 AM, MrSmith said:

OK. I don't know why, but this just reminded me of something that happened to a friend of mine when I was in 8th grade. His last name was Nigh. His father's name was Hugh. One night, his father got a call from an associate of his boss or possibly the guy was doing business with the company his father worked for. So, his dad gets on the phone and the caller asks who is speaking. The response was "Hugh Nigh". The caller heard it as "you and I" and repeated the question. This went on a few more times until the caller got fed up and ended up hanging up. I've never understood why his father didn't simply make a clarifying statement, but perhaps this occurred frequently enough that his father was sick of having to do that and just let the guy assume whatever he wanted.

Anyway, back to snarking about our pet peeves. I just had to share that funny story.

When my brother married his first wife she had a daughter named Nakoma (RIP Naki) and my brother was on her school contact list.  She got sick at school one day and they called my brother's work and left a message that his daughter Nakoma was sick and needed to be picked up.  The secretary called my brother and told him his daughter was in a coma and he had to get to the hospital right away. 

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(edited)
13 hours ago, riley702 said:

I'm peeved when someone on Facebook can't just offer sympathy for a loss, a crappy day, an illness - no, they have to outdo the poster by claiming their loss is more, their sickness is more severe or has lasted longer, or they're having the mother of all crappy days... IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. Just express your sympathies, commiseration or whatever and don't try to insert yourself into someone else's situation.

I couldn't agree more with this. It reads like a game of one-up when it is so not a game. It is someone's life. "I'm so sorry to hear that" or "How can I help?" seem to be better responses. (imo, too) 

Also, there's the insensitive person who says (upon hearing terrible news about someone,) "Welp, you're not the first to have it, you won't be the last. " Um... thanks.. for diminishing the pain.  Those words almost feel like mocking. There are so many other things that could be said that are comforting and kind. Otherwise, I agree,  those folks should not  say anything and give everyone a break.

Edited by ari333
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When my parents moved to Florida I posted on Facebook that I missed them. A bunch of my friends posted in comments my moms dead.  I deleted that post. 

     Although there are just people you get along with better or have more in common with favoritism at work is a pet peeve of mine.  A few of my coworkers and myself were upset that the college girls were getting a lot hours while we were fighting to keep our hours up to survive along with not losing our benefit s. The assistant manager in charge of the schedule also bought those girls and only them lunch almost every day.   When some of vented to other coworker we were told he likes the young pretty girls.  Thank you for not only calling me old but also ugly 

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I discovered yesterday that my air conditioning has apparently gone out in my car. First-world problem, I know, but when I had the last fender-bender (my fault), the body shop replaced the condenser. It was behind the grill and bracer bar behind the bumper. Let's hope this repair is under warranty.

My Honda Civic is a 2004 model, so she's feeling some age, but I love her, dammit. I've had to do relatively little work on her.

I have had only two cars (of four in 27 years) with air conditioning and have lived in NC my whole life. Hundred-degree humid days in non-AC cars are just no good.

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Why do I try to reason with trolls on feminist and liberal Instagram accounts that I follow? I cannot for the life of me fathom why a super-right winger would follow a feminist account. Boredom? Loneliness? And them my dumb ass is trying to educate them. Just stop! Ignore the trolls!

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(edited)
21 hours ago, MrSmith said:

I have a friend who posts, on average, 9 memes per day, all of which vaguely and in some passive-aggressive way is supposed to tell you what's going on with her life and the trouble she's having with <insert noun(s)>. And all of this is without giving detail of any kind. I had to start clicking the option to block all posts from the pages she gets her memes in order to improve the signal:noise ratio. Now that I've done that, I see almost nothing she posts. So, I might as well have saved myself the trouble and just unfollowed her. The reason I didn't is because that feels like being friends with her on Facebook is pointless - and the main reason I'm on Facebook is to keep in touch with far-flung friends.

You've heard of "vogue-posting"? That's posting selfies hoping people will tell you how good you look. This is the similar "vague-posting", where someone tosses out something like the above hoping people will beg them to tell them what it's about. They get attention and also self-righteously claim they didn't include personal details about their beef with (fill in the blank) until people just begged them to spill.

Edited by riley702
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'Vague-posting'.  Thanks for putting a name with the action, riley702!  I have friends on  FB that do that and it drives me crazy.  They won't post memes, but will just post a sentence like 'Sometimes I wonder if it's all worth it' or 'This was the worst day ever.  What more can happen to me?'  (I think the worst is when they just post one or two words-- 'wow!'  'Oh no!'  I always ignore them, because I know they are just posting so that people will bombard them with 'oh, no', 'what happened', 'you've got friends here', blah blah blah.  Blechh!

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Speaking of FB, I'm quite a bit annoyed with a friend. She lost her pet cat due to the negligent care of a local animal hospital. I lost my pet cat due to negligent care of the same animal hospital 10 years ago. She keeps posting about it and is basically on a witchhunt against the hospital too.  And I get it---I would have brought that place to its knees if 2007 social media even marginally resembled today's social media.

When I tried to reach out to her with my condolences and to let her know she isn't the only one this happened to, she fired back with a snotty "Well, if you had gone after them back then like I am now, they would have been shut down years ago. I can't believe you would be so emotional about a cat you lost 10 years ago anyway".

First off, my cat died 2 days after my uncle died, so I was dealing with 2 unexpected losses in 1 week. 2nd, I had no money and wasn't yet working in the animal-related field and had no rescue connections then like she has now. 3rd, as I mentioned, technology wasn't exactly the same as it is now.

I have worked with 1000s of cats since then and I have adopted 3 over the years. Not a single cat has ever come close to him in personality. He used to wait at the door when I got in and stood on his hind legs to be picked up everyday. His favorite thing was to play fetch with a tennis ball, like a dog. He only wanted to be by my side always. It was hurtful to lose him to negligent care at only 2 years old, but the biggest blow was losing him not 48 hrs after finding out my uncle had passed.

And so while I sympathize with this woman's similar situation, and while I watch her raise money to sue the hospital through GoFundMe and think its great that she has friends donating to her cause, FUCK HER for her snotty reply. I know she's going through an emotional time, but that doesn't give you a license to be a total asshole. It was her 2nd line that bugged because who are you to tell me how to feel and when to feel it. SMH

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32 minutes ago, BooksRule said:

'Vague-posting'.  Thanks for putting a name with the action, riley702!  I have friends on  FB that do that and it drives me crazy.  They won't post memes, but will just post a sentence like 'Sometimes I wonder if it's all worth it' or 'This was the worst day ever.  What more can happen to me?'  (I think the worst is when they just post one or two words-- 'wow!'  'Oh no!'  I always ignore them, because I know they are just posting so that people will bombard them with 'oh, no', 'what happened', 'you've got friends here', blah blah blah.  Blechh!

We call this vague-booking. I'm a bitch and call people out for it.

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(edited)

I joined a couple of grief groups on Facebook after my Mom died a little over a year ago. I still visit one of them at least once a week. I am always semi-shocked (would be completely if I hadn't come across so many asshats in life) at what people's family, friends and etc. tell them when it comes to getting through the grief process. My Mom would still cry if she talked about her Dad toomuch even 30yrs after he died. I still miss a cat I had in 2nd grade that died after getting hit by a car and he was just under 2 too. @AgentRXS I'm sorry your friend said that to you. Does she always say things like that to people or could the grief over her cat be making her moody? (That question kinda reads weird so I hope it came across right.)

I have a pet peeve regarding FB too. People who repost stuff like "Pray for so and so who's kid shot themselves with a nail gun..." like it happened to someone they know personally. Only to find out by looking on Snopes that it's something that was reposted into oblivion because it happened in 2010.

Edited by Jaded
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19 minutes ago, AgentRXS said:

When I tried to reach out to her with my condolences and to let her know she isn't the only one this happened to, she fired back with a snotty "Well, if you had gone after them back then like I am now, they would have been shut down years ago. I can't believe you would be so emotional about a cat you lost 10 years ago anyway".

That's revolting, particularly the second part.  People lash out when grieving, but this is beyond the pale.  Especially because this was written correspondence rather than a verbal conversation; she had time to think about what she was saying.

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(edited)
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@AgentRXS I'm sorry your friend said that to you. Does she always say things like that to people or could the grief over her cat be making her moody? (That question kinda reads weird so I hope it came across right.)

I have a pet peeve regarding FB too. People who repost stuff like "Pray for so and so who's kid shot themselves with a nail gun..." like it happened to someone they know personally. Only to find out by looking on Snopes that it's something that was reposted into oblivion because it happened in 2010.

She's one of those people who love to brag constantly on FB what a "bossy bitch" she is. Always telling stories about her co-workers living in fear of her.  I'm only friends with her because she does a lot of good work in cat rescue. I wasn't entirely shocked by her reply, just saddened that she couldn't respond decently to someone giving their condolences.

I can be a nasty bitch if provoked, but I tend to have social graces during a loss or when someone is trying to console me even if I'm not in the mood for it. Call me crazy.

 

Also, I hate those prayer chain copy-and-paste posts too. Or "I bet only my real friends will read this!! Copy-and-paste posts.

And don't get me started on the animal rescue posts: "Shared w/prayers". "Don't let him die please!!!1!" and my favorite: "I would take him if only I didn't live 30 states away, and have 30 cats/dog on my own". Or "I just need to hit the lottery and I'll take all these babies"! Yeah, I've never seen a rich person with 1000s of dogs/cats unless they were mentally ill hoarders......

Edited by AgentRXS
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I didn't know if this should go in the home improvement thread but I'm peeved about it so I'll put it here. 

We're having some work done on our kitchen and have had 7 companies come out in the past week to give us estimates.  Every single person walked into my kitchen and the first thing they all said was "we have to knock down this wall" that separates my kitchen from the living room.  We only use the back door to my house, its just easier to get there from the driveway and garage, if anybody ever knocks in the front door I know it's somebody wanting to sell me something or save my soul so I never answer it.  Anyway, the back door leads directly into my kitchen. Every contractor said that if I take the kitchen wall down I can see the entire house when I walk in the door. Why would I want that?  They say my view is beautiful and wouldn't I like to see it when I first walk in? No, no I wouldn't.  I like walls and distinct rooms and separation, why do people think removing walls so their whole house is one big room a good thing?  To each their own I guess but I hate this trend. I was just shocked that every damn one of them said the same thing then was surprised when I said no. 

Another thing that they all did was try to get me to choose white cabinets. I hate white kitchens.  On the phone I told them all that I wanted dark wood shaker cabinets but instead of bringing samples in those areas, they brought one wood sample and 5 white ones.  I love warm colors and natural wood, brick and stone, to me that's nice and cozy. I will never ever redo my beautiful natural brick fireplace but every contractor that's been in my house has wanted to tile it for me.  

Why don't these people get it that everyone has their own taste and preferences and not everyone follows trends?   It just seemed like they bought a bunch of materials that fit the trends and wanted to sell them to me. 

I blame all of these house flipping shows that have the same design in every single house. 

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2 hours ago, AgentRXS said:

She's one of those people who love to brag constantly on FB what a "bossy bitch" she is. Always telling stories about her co-workers living in fear of her.  I'm only friends with her because she does a lot of good work in cat rescue. I wasn't entirely shocked by her reply, just saddened that she couldn't respond decently to someone giving their condolences.

I can be a nasty bitch if provoked, but I tend to have social graces during a loss or when someone is trying to console me even if I'm not in the mood for it. Call me crazy.

Now is a good time to move her into the category of acquaintance.  

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your amazing cat so soon upon the passing of your uncle.  You had a cat that wanted to be picked up and played fetch.  What a joy to have in your life!

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37 minutes ago, forumfish said:

I hear ya, @Maharincess -- like I told people when we were doing some remodeling -- "we're doing this for us, not to sell the house." If I ask for design advice, fine. Otherwise, any company that doesn't respect that I want what I want doesn't get my money. Stand your ground!

Yes!  They kept talking about resale value and the next buyers.  I plan on staying right here until I die so I couldn't care less about what the next buyers will like. When we go, we're leaving the property to our kids, they already have it worked out that my son will buy out my daughter and he will live here. Even after telling them that they still talked about resale value. 

@riley702 it was so irritating. I'm usually nice to people who come to my home like that, I offer drinks and even food if its lunch time but I hate to say that I was rude to a couple of them because they just wouldn't listen to what I wanted. It was like they had an idea of what I should want and they weren't going to stop until I agreed. 

Needless to say, I won't be using any of those places to redo my kitchen. I have a week of estimates still ahead of me. 

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12 hours ago, bilgistic said:

Why do I try to reason with trolls on feminist and liberal Instagram accounts that I follow? I cannot for the life of me fathom why a super-right winger would follow a feminist account. Boredom? Loneliness? And them my dumb ass is trying to educate them. Just stop! Ignore the trolls!

They follow those threads for the same reason so many liberal minded people watch FOX News. To get themselves riled up, and to give themselves ammunition to use when they make their case that people with the opposite views are crazy. 

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11 hours ago, AgentRXS said:

"I can't believe you would be so emotional about a cat you lost 10 years ago anyway".

How fucking rude! As if grief has an expiration date. My dog died almost twenty years ago and I still tear up just thinking about him.

I guess we'll see how upset this rude woman is about her cat's death in ten years.

For the record, it is not your fault or responsibility for not suing the pants off that animal hospital so don't let her try to guilt trip you over her cat's death!

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@Maharincess I hope you showed them the door right after they revealed they didn't bring anything in the style you'd requested. What's the point of coming to your home only to waste your time with stuff you've (implicitly) stated from the outset you're not interested in? I know I would have unceremoniously thrown them out, but then I can be brutal like that.

@AgentRXS I'm sorry to hear about your cat passing away. I know how that can be. I still miss the dog I had to put to sleep back in 2002. Some animals just become part of you. What kind of cat was he? He sounds like he might have been either Pixie Bob or part Pixie Bob. Some of the personality traits sound similar to that breed. And I'm sorry your acquaintance was such a rude, unfeeling bitch.

When we lived in Kasson, MN there was a local veterinarian who had a bad reputation. (We never used them because friends in Rochester, who didn't even own pets, had warned me to stay away.) A friend we had made in Kasson lost a couple of her cats to their poor vet care and ended up reporting them to the state. When she went to get her cats' cremains from the vet, it took them almost an hour to find them. That's how many cremains they had! The state eventually shut them down and, unfortunately for our friend, she lost several friends in Kasson over it. (Not us because we didn't have any interest in taking sides. Though, she was clearly right to file a complaint.) It later turned out that several other customers had filed complaints, as well. So, the hammer was going to come down on that vet whether our friend got involved or not. Anyway, the point is not to feel bad about not filing a complaint. You're not obligated and, clearly, even with the vet in Kasson there were many people who didn't file complaints.

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What kind of cat was he? He sounds like he might have been either Pixie Bob or part Pixie Bob.

He was just a standard Domestic Shorthair, white/with black tabby markings.  I was working at Blockbuster at the time, and one of my co-workers found him in the alleyway right before my shift started.

LOL thinking about him reminds me of what he used to do when my then-boyfriend would come over. He was cool with him until we started making out, which at that point, EVERY TIME, my cat would jump up and attempt to curl up on my lap, as if to say to him "Not tonight,buddy". That guy ended up being a total douche so I should have followed my cat's instincts.

This particular place has a great reputation for dog care, but their negligent cat care seems tends get swept under the rug. They are one of the oldest animal hospital in the area, dating back to the 1960s. I doubt that even if this lawsuit becomes high-profile for them, that it will have negative impact on their business, much less get shut down. They will probably settle with her out of court and keep it moving.

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58 minutes ago, AgentRXS said:

He was just a standard Domestic Shorthair, white/with black tabby markings.  I was working at Blockbuster at the time, and one of my co-workers found him in the alleyway right before my shift started.

LOL thinking about him reminds me of what he used to do when my then-boyfriend would come over. He was cool with him until we started making out, which at that point, EVERY TIME, my cat would jump up and attempt to curl up on my lap, as if to say to him "Not tonight,buddy". That guy ended up being a total douche so I should have followed my cat's instincts.

LOL. That's cute that he would do that. When you're thinking of adding another cat to your home, perhaps check with a Pixie Bob rescue and try to get one of them. Or, if you're not against buying from a breeder, you can check with one of them if the rescues don't turn up any. (We used to breed Pixie Bobs.)

Quote

This particular place has a great reputation for dog care, but their negligent cat care seems tends get swept under the rug. They are one of the oldest animal hospital in the area, dating back to the 1960s. I doubt that even if this lawsuit becomes high-profile for them, that it will have negative impact on their business, much less get shut down. They will probably settle with her out of court and keep it moving.

Well, it also depends on whether the state veterinary board gets involved or not. The lady in Kasson (and others) made complaints to the MN veterinary board and they launched an investigation. Their investigation fined the head vet, revoked the license of one of the lead vets that worked for him, and forced the closure of that office. Apparently, he had two offices and would spend most of his time at the other one, leaving the one in Kasson to be managed by the lady vet whose license was revoked.

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Probably the only other people who are going to understand this peeve are people who write software. But here goes because it's just really pissing me off today...

I'm working with Node.js and React (and React Toolbox). Just starting to learn React and React Toolbox, and they've got some documentation of their framework on their site. I'm thinking "This is great. I can go through their documentation and do some stuff and learn it." Then I get to the point where I want to create an html table with some data (still following their documentation and instructions) and I keep getting errors. More Googling reveals that their documentation is completely out of date! I'm using v2.0.0, and their documentation is for v1.X (1.3 I think). Seriously, WTF?

So, now I'm left to try to figure out how to do this "the right way" (as opposed to "the wrong way", which amounts to writing a ton of html by hand - which is a pain in the ass) by looking through their damn code to see how to write this. And I'm not even sure their code will tell me what I really need to know!

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(edited)
15 hours ago, Maharincess said:

No, no I wouldn't.  I like walls and distinct rooms and separation, why do people think removing walls so their whole house is one big room a good thing?  To each their own I guess but I hate this trend. I was just shocked that every damn one of them said the same thing then was surprised when I said no. 

Another thing that they all did was try to get me to choose white cabinets. I hate white kitchens.  On the phone I told them all that I wanted dark wood shaker cabinets but instead of bringing samples in those areas, they brought one wood sample and 5 white ones.  I love warm colors and natural wood, brick and stone, to me that's nice and cozy. I will never ever redo my beautiful natural brick fireplace but every contractor that's been in my house has wanted to tile it for me.  

Why don't these people get it that everyone has their own taste and preferences and not everyone follows trends?   It just seemed like they bought a bunch of materials that fit the trends and wanted to sell them to me. 

I blame all of these house flipping shows that have the same design in every single house. 

I redid my kitchen (kind of, just refaced the cabinets) a few years back.  I also like walls, and darker cabinets.  Luckily no one tried to sway me to something I didn't like, because I would've shown them the door. I don't get the open concept thing at all.  Why would I want to see what's in my kitchen when I'm sitting in my living room?  So I can be reminded of the dishes I forgot to do?  White cabinets are another solid no.  I got a nice, warm cherry-ish color that really made the existing granite pop.  I hated the granite counter tops before I changed the cabinet color from 90s blonde.  Just like that blonde color dates a kitchen immediately to the 90s, white cabinets and grey counters will immediately place a kitchen in this decade 20 years from now.    

Edited by janestclair
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Mine was the exact opposite, lol! I have a very small kitchen (house was built in the 1940's) so white cabinets brighten up the space and make it feel larger. I was having contractors in a few years ago to give me bids on redoing it and one contractor was insistent that he would get me to change my mind on doing cherry wood cabinets, even though I told him I was in no way interested in that at all. Needless to say, he didn't get the job and only got about 15 minutes before I showed him the door.

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19 hours ago, Maharincess said:

Another thing that they all did was try to get me to choose white cabinets. I hate white kitchens.  On the phone I told them all that I wanted dark wood shaker cabinets but instead of bringing samples in those areas, they brought one wood sample and 5 white ones.  I love warm colors and natural wood, brick and stone, to me that's nice and cozy. I will never ever redo my beautiful natural brick fireplace but every contractor that's been in my house has wanted to tile it for me.  

Why don't these people get it that everyone has their own taste and preferences and not everyone follows trends?   It just seemed like they bought a bunch of materials that fit the trends and wanted to sell them to me. 

I blame all of these house flipping shows that have the same design in every single house. 

II think its pointless to follow trends because they change often enough that you are doomed to be off -trend almost as soon as you finish the job.  Trends exist to stimulate a subset of people to re-do their home design/décor more often than is needed. 

I think open design concept is an invention that lets home builders cram more rooms into the same space without it seeming cramped.  Inevitably if your house wasn't built as an open concept then you are going to lose a wall that needs to be there because 1) its load bearing and expensive or 2) it has stuff on it that you need like cabinets.

I'm a believer in redecorating to your own preference with a caveat that you should be willing to personalize only so much that you are willing to deal with the consequences (such as a negotiated escrow payment to a buyer so they can de-personalize) or won't get sick of it. 

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(edited)

I think I found my contractor today. I'm still going to have the other estimates done this week but I think I'm going with this guy. He listened to what I wanted, brought the appropriate samples and he hates open concept as much as I do. He was on the expensive side but it will be worth it.   He brought his dog with him and the dog was a border collie so I took that as a good sign. He left the dog in the truck but I insisted he bring him in and told him if I hired him, I would require the dog to come every day.  

ETA:  Sorry, I know this isn't a peeve but it was a continuation of a peeve so I hope its ok. 

Edited by Maharincess
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I went (back) to the neurologist today to try to figure out a new/better treatment plan for my frequent migraines. The doc and I agreed upon an additional preventive med and a different med to take when I get a migraine, and he's going to try to get my insurance to approve Botox (Really! It's injected all over the head for migraines, not just in the forehead/face as in cosmetic use).

I just filled my former migraine med Rx about two weeks ago. I get only 12 at a time because of insurance. I'm already out because of nearly daily migraines. The med doesn't even work that well, but it's better than nothing.

I went to pick up the new meds after work, and OF COURSE, Cigna won't pay for the new migraine pain med. So I'm completely out of migraine meds until hopefully the "pre-authorization" comes through from the doc (pharmacy sent to doc). The pills are $50 each, so I can't exactly pay out of pocket. I had a three-day debilitating migraine (had to be in bed in the dark) two weeks ago. Those since have been relatively manageable (I worked through them). Let's hope the new preventive med works.

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An open floor plan is one of my variations of hell, because I don't want to see the kitchen while in the living room or dining room, and I prefer a floor plan that creates some private spaces. I'm okay with white cabinets or other colors, but those home design decorator shows that try to convince people that they absolutely must have the cabinet color of the month drive me nuts. My mother used to watch all those shows, and it is an incredible relief not to have to sit through those while resisting the impulse to hurl things at the television and/or yell at it, "This client knows what he/she wants, and it isn't what you're trying to shove down his/her throat." By the same token, I made it through roughly half of an episode of What Not to Wear (or whatever the fuck that show is called) before realizing that I would murder anyone who took that condescending tone about my wardrobe and told me I had to throw out all my old clothes. Not everyone likes the same styles, whether it's floor plans or clothes; stop trying to make people buy crap they neither need nor want by making them feel they're not trendy enough.  I pretty much hate shows or people IRL who seem to enjoy making others feel that they're not entitled to their own personal preferences and instead need to be told what they "should" like.  

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On ‎4‎/‎2‎/‎2017 at 11:01 PM, Maharincess said:

. Every contractor said that if I take the kitchen wall down I can see the entire house when I walk in the door. Why would I want that?  They say my view is beautiful and wouldn't I like to see it when I first walk in? No, no I wouldn't.  I like walls and distinct rooms and separation, why do people think removing walls so their whole house is one big room a good thing?  To each their own I guess but I hate this trend. I was just shocked that every damn one of them said the same thing then was surprised when I said no. 

I get the Open spaces concept, and it's great - in theory.  But, it wouldn't work for me either.   I don't want to see my entire house from one room.   I would like to cook in the kitchen and not be "on display" to the rest of the house.  And if i'm chatting in the living room, I don't have to be looking at the kitchen.  I like separate rooms for separate things.   I like being able to forget the mess in the kitchen while I sit down and watch a movie after dinner. 

I see tv shows all the time where they call a perfectly nice, functional kitchen "dated".  It's like women's fashion - this season, light and airy kitchens are in.  Before too long, we'll  find a negative word for "light and airy" and say that dark woods and bright colors are in.  Think about appliance colors - white was out, everyone has to have beige,  then black, then stainless steel.  Now, stainless steel is out, but I can't remember what is "in".  It doesn't matter, because  my kitchen is dated - and so am I.

It's the home remodeling industry trying to convince us that you HAVE to completely re-do your kitchen at least every 8 years or so. 

So - do it your way, and be glad that it's not what's in style right now.  

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(edited)
12 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I went (back) to the neurologist today to try to figure out a new/better treatment plan for my frequent migraines. The doc and I agreed upon an additional preventive med and a different med to take when I get a migraine, and he's going to try to get my insurance to approve Botox (Really! It's injected all over the head for migraines, not just in the forehead/face as in cosmetic use).

I just filled my former migraine med Rx about two weeks ago. I get only 12 at a time because of insurance. I'm already out because of nearly daily migraines. The med doesn't even work that well, but it's better than nothing.

I went to pick up the new meds after work, and OF COURSE, Cigna won't pay for the new migraine pain med. So I'm completely out of migraine meds until hopefully the "pre-authorization" comes through from the doc (pharmacy sent to doc). The pills are $50 each, so I can't exactly pay out of pocket. I had a three-day debilitating migraine (had to be in bed in the dark) two weeks ago. Those since have been relatively manageable (I worked through them). Let's hope the new preventive med works.

I can really empathize with what you are going through.  I also suffer from migraines since the age of 13, and some months get more than 15 headache days a month, and my insurance also only gives me 12 pills per month(which my doctor had to get an override for from 9 per month).   I've been getting Botox for migraine since 2005.  I have to say that I still get as many as 8-15 headache days per month and sometimes I question why I still get the Botox or if it does anything at all.  I do think it helps a little with the severity of my headaches though, sometimes now my pills actually work and the headache goes away.  Before Botox I always knew that once I got a headache no matter what time in the day it was I would have a headache until I went to sleep and might wake up with it in the morning.  I hope whatever your doctor decides upon works for you.

Edited by partofme
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Last night, I started a beta blocker (nadolol) that the doc prescribed and the insurance did pay for,  and woke up this morning without a headache, for once! Hope springs eternal!

I also called the doc's office to light a fire under them to get that Rx insurance pre-authorization with a quickness.

The doc said that Botox works in about two out of three patients. :\

I don't know why I can't spell out "doctor".

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(edited)
Quote

And I fear that if I fill out the evaluation form saying there were typos in the presentation, my comment will be disregarded as either wrong or nit-picky.

It is my ACTUAL JOB to correct that kind of stuff and I get called nitpicky.

Quote

Although there are just people you get along with better or have more in common with favoritism at work is a pet peeve of mine.  A few of my coworkers and myself were upset that the college girls were getting a lot hours while we were fighting to keep our hours up to survive along with not losing our benefit s. The assistant manager in charge of the schedule also bought those girls and only them lunch almost every day.   When some of vented to other coworker we were told he likes the young pretty girls.  Thank you for not only calling me old but also ugly 

We have that here and while I don't really care about favoritism itself(I'm just here to do my job--well!--and go home), I get annoyed when it is obvious (and not because I am not one of the favored ones). It's just gross.

Edited by TattleTeeny
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Just once, I want someone on one of the home renovation shows to say no when the designer says, "First, we're going to tear down all the walls." I wonder if they are allowed to say no or if they have to go along with whatever the designer says even if they are going to be the ones who live there.  I wish they'd do follow-up shows to find out if anyone ever put a wall back up.

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