Barbara Evans

[Mkay]

I thought the show was funny. To me it seemed like Barbara was thrilled to have an adult in the house with her. She is looking for companionship, maybe she gets very excited and talkative when she finally has adult conversation.  I tend to do that sometimes, myself. 

[GreatKazu]

Quote

However, even Jenelle appears lucid and sane

I must have missed those episodes.

I think most people are pointing out how Ashleigh is at least aware of what Barb does as a parent and grandparent, and she points out the fact Jenelle is not capable of having Jace in her care. This is in contrast to the assumptions being made that Barb's kids are all fuck ups who are likely just like Jenelle.  Ashleigh has a conscience, something Jenelle does not have. There is something scary about people who don't have a soul or conscience. Does this make Ashleigh a perfect person? Of course not. She may have her own issues. But she is not dead behind the eyes and seems to have feelings. The only feelings Jenelle has is when she is crying, "Why are you sooooo meeeeeean to ME?!!" Self-centered bitch. Ashleigh gives credit to her mother. That is something Jenelle cannot do.

[gunderda]

Any time Janelle or anyone else makes a comment about Janelle getting custody I wish Barb would just say "THEN GO TO COURT AND TRY TO GET IT!" 

[ghoulina]

I'm probably the lone dissenter, but I'm not ready to jump on the Ashleigh train. We only saw a few minutes of her, so there's no way to know what she is really like. She could be just as bad as Jenelle and held herself together for the special. Once you've been filming for awhile, it's easy to get used to the cameras and let the real you come out more. 

Is she Gabriel's mother? The one Barb is/was raising along with Jace? It's quite likely she's another loser, just like Jenelle. I can see that toxic family going through cycles - where various people are on good terms with one another and then it switches. Sure, Ashleigh says it like it is with Jenelle, but that doesn't mean she's honest about who SHE is. That entire family is a mess. 

Barb is funny and I enjoyed her special, but I think there's a good chance she royally screwed up when raising her kids. She has still done some pretty questionable things with Jace (telling him he's going to have to live somewhere else if he doesn't behave, engaging in screaming matches in front of him). I do think she's maybe learned from mistakes she mad as a young, single mom and is doing a better job with Jace than she did with Jenelle, but I just can't give her a pass on a lot of her crap just because she's a hilarious foil to psychotic Jenelle. 

[SPLAIN]

1 hour ago, ghoulina said:

I'm probably the lone dissenter, but I'm not ready to jump on the Ashleigh train. We only saw a few minutes of her, so there's no way to know what she is really like. She could be just as bad as Jenelle and held herself together for the special. Once you've been filming for awhile, it's easy to get used to the cameras and let the real you come out more. 

Is she Gabriel's mother? The one Barb is/was raising along with Jace? It's quite likely she's another loser, just like Jenelle. I can see that toxic family going through cycles - where various people are on good terms with one another and then it switches. Sure, Ashleigh says it like it is with Jenelle, but that doesn't mean she's honest about who SHE is. That entire family is a mess. 

Barb is funny and I enjoyed her special, but I think there's a good chance she royally screwed up when raising her kids. She has still done some pretty questionable things with Jace (telling him he's going to have to live somewhere else if he doesn't behave, engaging in screaming matches in front of him). I do think she's maybe learned from mistakes she mad as a young, single mom and is doing a better job with Jace than she did with Jenelle, but I just can't give her a pass on a lot of her crap just because she's a hilarious foil to psychotic Jenelle. 

Barb is a good and funny person and she has also screwed up as a human being. She is like a lot of parents.

I have never given Barbara any passes for her questionable behavior. I have given her major stink eye. I have seen some of the most wonderful parents falter at times and say things to their kids out of pure frustration. Jenelle is a fuck up 100 percent of the time and is not capable of raising children. Barbara has done a hell of a job in assuring Jace has stability. Does she suck at it when she gets caught up arguing with Jenelle? You bet. Does she let her anger get the best of her in front of Jace and to Jace? For sure. Does she love that little boy while putting her own needs on the backburner? Hell yes. 

Allow me to add that I don't view Barbara the way I do because I compare her to Jenelle. I remove the psychotic Jenelle aspect from it and view Barbara as the person she is and as the caretaker of Jace. It is too easy to side with Barbara by comparing her to Jenelle. Anyone looks great compared to Jenelle. Barbara, for the most part, has true love and concern for Jace's overall well-being. She is holding on to him and not wanting to release him back to Jenelle because she knows his life will be screwed once that happens. I have to give major props to the lady for being there to give Jace stability, attention and love.

Edited July 13, 2016 by SPLAIN

[ghoulina]

Barb definitely loves Jace, which is more than his narcissistic mother can say. But love isn't always enough. As a parent, it's your duty to provide a safe, stable environment as well. Sure, Jace has lived in that same house his entire life, but other than that - I don't see a lot of stability. He has never had a set visitation schedule with Jenelle. Sometimes he would see her every weekend, then he months would go by without him seeing her. Granted, no one can help Jenelle's behavior, but a lot of those choices were made by Barb. They get in a big fight, and Jenelle can't see Jace for awhile. Again, there's often a good reason, but stop with the back and forth. It's confusing and scary to a little kid. If Barb was really 100% concerned with Jace's well being she would never engage with Jenelle. But she continues to do so.

And I just can't get passed telling the kid he'll have to find somewhere else to live if he doesn't shape up. Kids take things like that very literally. I bet he is constantly afraid he's going to be sent to live with Jenelle and whatever asshole is using her that month. I do think Barb tries. But I also see her as the type of parent who yells a lot, but never follows through. I think it's quite likely all 3 of her kids were raised in a very similarly toxic environment and I just don't want to see this cycle continue. I don't hate Barb. I think she has had it hard in her life as well. But I'd respect her a lot more if she put herself and Jace in therapy and learned some better ways to communicate, and didn't allow these rifts with Jenelle to wreck havoc on this little boy's mind. 

[Chicken Wing]

Quote

 

I'm probably the lone dissenter, but I'm not ready to jump on the Ashleigh train. We only saw a few minutes of her, so there's no way to know what she is really like. She could be just as bad as Jenelle and held herself together for the special. Once you've been filming for awhile, it's easy to get used to the cameras and let the real you come out more. 

Is she Gabriel's mother? The one Barb is/was raising along with Jace? It's quite likely she's another loser, just like Jenelle. I can see that toxic family going through cycles - where various people are on good terms with one another and then it switches. Sure, Ashleigh says it like it is with Jenelle, but that doesn't mean she's honest about who SHE is. That entire family is a mess. 

 

I agree about Ashleigh. It's nice to see Barbara have a normal human conversation with one of her children, but we only saw Ashleigh for a few minutes. We don't know anything about what she's typically like or how they carry on on the regular. It was just a couple of conversations. And really, even Jenelle can have a normal conversation with her mother for five minutes. We've seen it happen from time to time. And I too think Ashleigh was being very aware of the cameras and being very deliberate about what she said and how she acted. Barbara, you can tell, is long used to this nonsense and so is much more relaxed and off the cuff as she usually is.

[TexasGal]

I loved seeing Jace with that crew member.  It made me happy to see him interact with a normal non-trashy man.

[toodywoody]

I loved this. 

I loved how she was looking for someone with a boat. The talk about shaving balls was funny. And them laughing about having a big mouth. 

I loved seeing Barbara being normal and laughing and having fun. Sure she fucked as a parent, we all have. She has messed up as a grand parent but I see a change from the Teen Mom first episode with Jenelle. She tries not to fight with Jenelle but there is no reasoning with Jenelle. Just like the phone call and Jenwlle starts screaming at her. Enough Jenelle, just enough already. Barbara is right, grow up.

[ArizonaGrown]

5 hours ago, SPLAIN said:

Barb is a good and funny person and she has also screwed up as a human being. She is like a lot of parents.

I have never given Barbara any passes for her questionable behavior. I have given her major stink eye. I have seen some of the most wonderful parents falter at times and say things to their kids out of pure frustration. Jenelle is a fuck up 100 percent of the time and is not capable of raising children. Barbara has done a hell of a job in assuring Jace has stability. Does she suck at it when she gets caught up arguing with Jenelle? You bet. Does she let her anger get the best of her in front of Jace and to Jace? For sure. Does she love that little boy while putting her own needs on the backburner? Hell yes. 

Allow me to add that I don't view Barbara the way I do because I compare her to Jenelle. I remove the psychotic Jenelle aspect from it and view Barbara as the person she is and as the caretaker of Jace. It is too easy to side with Barbara by comparing her to Jenelle. Anyone looks great compared to Jenelle. Barbara, for the most part, has true love and concern for Jace's overall well-being. She is holding on to him and not wanting to release him back to Jenelle because she knows his life will be screwed once that happens. I sve to give major props to the lady for being there to give Jace stability, attention and love.

Okay so I have watched this show from day one and I have not seen Barb put Jace before her own needs on many many occasions. If she did she would not engage with Jenelle in all the screaming matches we have seen and also everyone forgets that Jace is a normal little boy who wants to be "normal" or more like children his age MOST of whom live with their MOTHERS. Not the Grandparents - other children will make fun of him and if they dont he will still feel like something is wrong with him because he doesnt live with his MOM. Here is another thing that is not ever considered here is that reality tv doesnt show the reality of a lot of situations and for Jenelle to open up or show emotions is probably something she tries not to do with the cameras rolling because when she did as a teen she was criticized and judged for that to this day and so I would try not to let the camera see that side of me too if I had to live through the judgement of my behavior at such a young age  for the rest of my life. I made a lot of mistakes when I was a teen but am so grateful that I do not have to defend my bad behavior for the rest of my life. She is still very young and considering the stability of her home life I am sure she is struggling to make healthy choices for herself - obviously she doesnt have any guidance from her mother who is just like a fan and only gets mad and judges her. 

We can see the track record of Barb when it comes to raising children - her daughter Ashleigh is not well adjusted and here are some examples that prove this - http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2192478/Teen-Mom-2-star-Jenelle-Evans-hits-big-sister-Ashleigh-sells-story.html  

http://cafemom2014.blogspot.com/2015/01/sibling-rivalry-at-its-best-teen-mom-2s.html

[CofCinci]

1 hour ago, TexasGal said:

I loved seeing Jace with that crew member.  It made me happy to see him interact with a normal non-trashy man.

I wonder if that guy is sweet on Babs. 

[ArizonaGrown]

Also if Barb thinks that the show ruined Jenelles life somehow why didnt she take her off the show and not allow it to continue when Jenelle was 16?  I have never seen Barb playing with Jace only yelling at him or giving him the run down on what happened when with his mom. She also drinks a lot and I dont think that is putting him first or at all only herself. I think Jenelle mirrors what she learned as a child and that is erratic Barbara - and while she seems to get a pass on the ground that she learned from her mistakes she clearly hasnt because she continues to disregard her daughter which is her track record blazing for all to see - and by doing so is not putting Jace first at all. All children love their mothers regardless of how bad they are and just talking bad about her does not do him any good. Examples this season - "Jace do you think your mommy has lots of boyfriends" - "Do you think mommy gets boyfriends too fast" - "What did you do at mommies house? You didnt go anywhere this weekend" well thats boring. No Barb life is not always a circus. Going in the house with the children and banging on the door with Jace and Gabriel in tow - then acting like a immature teen out of control of all emotions in front of them is not putting anyone but herself first and her feelings like she does a lot - am not surprised when Jenelle does the same I think she only knows this from her mother. If we are going to hold Jenelle accountable for the past lets hold Barb as well who has not done the work to get herself better either. 

Edited July 14, 2016 by ArizonaGrown

[GreatKazu]

Quote

 I have never seen Barb playing with Jace

Go back and watch the show again. There have been episodes where she was shown playing with Jace, and excuse me but, a person who is almost in their 60s and takes care of their grandchild on a daily while working full-time at Walmart and provides everything for that child, is obviously working her ass off and is putting that child's needs first before her own. Barb is not a young lady like Kail or Chelsea but yet, she is doing her duty just like them and likely more. 

Anyways...

Jenelle's reaction to the special: http://radaronline.com/celebrity-news/jenelle-evans-slams-mtv-being-barbara-special-threatens-quit-teen-mom-2/

Quote

Jenelle Evans urged fans to check out her mother’s special Being Barbara, but little did she know her mom used the spotlight to trash her daughter! The Teen Mom 2 star fired at MTV over the shocking special.

“Never promoting for another show unless I’ve saw the episode first,” Evans, 24, wrote in now-deleted tweets. “@MTV makes me look so f**king stupid all time.”

The mother-of-two continued her rant, “Honestly haven’t saw the #BeingBarbara special but to promote a show that mainly talked s**t about me with my own blood? Wow. Disappointed.”

But of course! It is MTV's fault, not Jenelle's. Ever! 

How  many times over the seasons have you bad-mouthed your own blood, Jenelle? How many times did you tell your mother you hated her? How many times did you tell your dick of the season how much you hate your mother and what a bitch she is to you? Girrrrrrl, you talked soooo much shit about Barb there isn't enough toilet paper to wipe that dirty mouth of yours. 

 

Ashleigh has something going on because she wears wigs. I seem to remember an article from long ago where it mentioned she lost her hair. I don't remember if she suffered from Alopecia or something else, but it was clear in this special that she must still suffer from hair loss because the wig was obvious. I also remember an article where Jenelle and Keefuh were both bashing Ashleigh on Twitter and calling her out for being bald. So typical of Jenelle. There was that link posted here several weeks back where certain Jenelle tweets were put together. Those photos showed her tweets where she is calling out people for being ugly, fat, and several other demeaning and derogatory names. No shocker that she and Keefuh would resort to putting down her own sister. And of course there are all the times Jenelle has said some vicious and horrible things to Barb such as what was shown in the beginning of this special. 

Edited July 14, 2016 by GreatKazu

[DangerousMinds]

Unless I've saw the episode first? She is one dumb bitch.

[WhosThatGirl]

I've seen many moments where Barb has played with Jace and interacted with him. And yes, Barb has also done some questionable things, such as saying 'find another place to live' to him, but no one is perfect. She gives him a much more stable environment that Janelle ever could. 

[Darknight]

2 hours ago, ArizonaGrown said:

Also if Barb thinks that the show ruined Jenelles life somehow why didnt she take her off the show and not allow it to continue when Jenelle was 16?  I have never seen Barb playing with Jace only yelling at him or giving him the run down on what happened when with his mom. She also drinks a lot and I dont think that is putting him first or at all only herself. I think Jenelle mirrors what she learned as a child and that is erratic Barbara - and while she seems to get a pass on the ground that she learned from her mistakes she clearly hasnt because she continues to disregard her daughter which is her track record blazing for all to see - and by doing so is not putting Jace first at all. All children love their mothers regardless of how bad they are and just talking bad about her does not do him any good. Examples this season - "Jace do you think your mommy has lots of boyfriends" - "Do you think mommy gets boyfriends too fast" - "What did you do at mommies house? You didnt go anywhere this weekend" well thats boring. No Barb life is not always a circus. Going in the house with the children and banging on the door with Jace and Gabriel in tow - then acting like a immature teen out of control of all emotions in front of them is not putting anyone but herself first and her feelings like she does a lot - am not surprised when Jenelle does the same I think she only knows this from her mother. If we are going to hold Jenelle accountable for the past lets hold Barb as well who has not done the work to get herself better either. 

Babs could've let Jace go into foster care. She's didn't. She begged Jenelle to place Jace up for adoption. She wanted Jenelle off drugs. Babs works a min wage job is 60 and is raising her grandson. So what she drinks a little. I don't blame her. She doesn't have bf coming in and out. She helps Jace with home work. She puts him to bed. She could use so parenting classes but she does care about Jace and put him first. 

[GreatKazu]

28 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

Unless I've saw the episode first? She is one dumb bitch.

This.

I have a headache reading her words.

[SophiaPehawkins]

What is Jenelle looking for? Sympathy? Pity? Congratulations? She is so delusional. And the hypocrisy of it all. Barb and her sister were talking about the things she's done and is doing wrong that's affecting her ability to parent successfully. That's not "talking shit." Maybe it would be better if they called you a bitch and said they didn't care if you died.

Barb was right about how this little amount of fame Jenelle has is seriously fucking her up. I don't think she'd be doing so great without it, but while there are similarities between mother and daughter, Barb is much more granted. Jenelle is going to have a difficult if not impossible time adjusting once all of this goes away. Not to mention, having her little minions on social media constantly reaffirming to her what a good mother she is and how awful Barb is for keeping Jace away, means she takes zero responsibility for why things are the way they are.

[ArizonaGrown]

I think it speaks volumes that the producer was not on just Barbs side but seemed to be on the side of Jenelle - I really think that is an indication that maybe we arent shown the whole picture?

[HeySandyStrange]

9 minutes ago, ArizonaGrown said:

I think it speaks volumes that the producer was not on just Barbs side but seemed to be on the side of Jenelle - I really think that is an indication that maybe we arent shown the whole picture?

Haven't seen Barb's special yet, but I'd assume the producer's of Teen Mom want to stay on the Moms' good sides, especially the resident trainwrecks Leah and Jenelle. Their antics, after all, make the show the ratings grabber it is and Jenelle is a big part of that. If memory serves me, Jenelle wanted to storm out of the reunion before the last and she had the whole MTV crew following her, kissing her ass. At the end of the day, these producers and crew members are in it for the buck, so I don't tend to believe that they care about the best interests of anyone involved, and they certainly don't benefit from pissing off Jenelle. So they try to kiss her ass to make them (producers) look like the good guys and Barb and Ashleigh the bad guys, thus ensuring more possible storylines in the future.

[SPLAIN]

52 minutes ago, ArizonaGrown said:

I think it speaks volumes that the producer was not on just Barbs side but seemed to be on the side of Jenelle - I really think that is an indication that maybe we arent shown the whole picture?

Don't think so at all.

The producers are always on the side of the girls because without the girls there is no show and without the show, the producers' cash flow is gone.

It is not about what we haven't seen as much as what has been shown of Jenelle.

I am not interested in poor, misunderstood Jenelle and Barb is an ass, just like the whole Adam is misunderstood and Chelsea is an ass.

9 hours ago, ghoulina said:

Barb definitely loves Jace, which is more than his narcissistic mother can say. But love isn't always enough. As a parent, it's your duty to provide a safe, stable environment as well. Sure, Jace has lived in that same house his entire life, but other than that - I don't see a lot of stability. He has never had a set visitation schedule with Jenelle. Sometimes he would see her every weekend, then he months would go by without him seeing her. Granted, no one can help Jenelle's behavior, but a lot of those choices were made by Barb. They get in a big fight, and Jenelle can't see Jace for awhile. Again, there's often a good reason, but stop with the back and forth. It's confusing and scary to a little kid. If Barb was really 100% concerned with Jace's well being she would never engage with Jenelle. But she continues to do so.

And I just can't get passed telling the kid he'll have to find somewhere else to live if he doesn't shape up. Kids take things like that very literally. I bet he is constantly afraid he's going to be sent to live with Jenelle and whatever asshole is using her that month. I do think Barb tries. But I also see her as the type of parent who yells a lot, but never follows through. I think it's quite likely all 3 of her kids were raised in a very similarly toxic environment and I just don't want to see this cycle continue. I don't hate Barb. I think she has had it hard in her life as well. But I'd respect her a lot more if she put herself and Jace in therapy and learned some better ways to communicate, and didn't allow these rifts with Jenelle to wreck havoc on this little boy's mind. 

Fully agree about love isn't always enough. I made my own rant about this in the  Leah thread as I responded to the idea that she is a mother who loves her children. No, Leah doesn't love her children the way she should. It is not enough to say "I love you". I also pointed out just because we don't see Leah screaming and yelling on camera to her kids like Jenelle, that doesn't make her the world's greatest mom who loves her kids. There are many ways to be abusive to children. Jenelle and Leah show two different examples of doing just that. 

There is more to just giving birth to children and telling them you love them. Barb is not an addict. Barb makes sure Jace is in his car seat. Barb has ensured Jace has a roof over his head. She has put him in activities such as karate and boy scouts. She has nurtured him, tended to him, and has not dumped him off with countless relatives. She has not had different men around Jace or even had a steady man in her life since Mike was kicked to the curb. She even made sure to get Jace properly diagnosed and on medication for his ADHD. She is not denying him the medical help he needs. I don't follow these people on social media, but I haven't seen anyone post any social media page of Barb where she is showing photos of herself as she comments how she has cleaned her house while proclaiming how much she loves Jace. I have not see a photo of her as she shows off her latest tattoo while bragging about going on vacation for the 20th time, nor have I seen any photos where she is proclaiming what a perfect grandmother she is and how life is grand. Barb has a life caring for Jace. I think she does a hell of a job and shows how  much she loves Jace in countless ways.

[eskimo]

I did wonder, as I was watching, what kind of hell was unfolding at the Evans' households at that moment. 

[ChocolateAddict]

10 hours ago, ArizonaGrown said:

Okay so I have watched this show from day one and I have not seen Barb put Jace before her own needs on many many occasions. If she did she would not engage with Jenelle in all the screaming matches we have seen and also everyone forgets that Jace is a normal little boy who wants to be "normal" or more like children his age MOST of whom live with their MOTHERS. Not the Grandparents - other children will make fun of him and if they dont he will still feel like something is wrong with him because he doesnt live with his MOM. Here is another thing that is not ever considered here is that reality tv doesnt show the reality of a lot of situations and for Jenelle to open up or show emotions is probably something she tries not to do with the cameras rolling because when she did as a teen she was criticized and judged for that to this day and so I would try not to let the camera see that side of me too if I had to live through the judgement of my behavior at such a young age  for the rest of my life. I made a lot of mistakes when I was a teen but am so grateful that I do not have to defend my bad behavior for the rest of my life. She is still very young and considering the stability of her home life I am sure she is struggling to make healthy choices for herself - obviously she doesnt have any guidance from her mother who is just like a fan and only gets mad and judges her. 

Ok I'm going to go through this point by point. 

1. Barb could have let Jace live with Jenelle in some drug den with no proper care or let him go into the system.  She did neither.  Instead she put aside her plans for living peacefully in her 60s and has continued to work at her minimum wage job while caring for a baby/toddler/kindergartner.   Yeah she has made some mistakes but Jenelle can't even put aside her *Spring Break* to go to Jace's go-kart event. 

2. I beyond hate this argument.  By that logic I guess we should give all the kids in out-of-home care back and get rid of same-sex parenting because those aren't "normal" families by your definition.  Jenelle has done nothing to prove herself as a fit parent yet apparently the thinking of 5 year olds in the playground should dictate what happens?  More to the point Jenelle has never actually tried to get Jace back!  She has never done more than speak to a lawyer let along actually draft up a potential custody transfer plan.  

2.5. "Normal" for Jace sailed a long, long time ago.  Basically the minute that Jenelle signed that bottom line.  I really think that being raised by Barb is the least of his "mommy" woes considering that Jenelle has been on TV high, drunk and being arrested. 

3. Jenelle doesn't have a problem showing emotion, we have seen plenty of anger, annoyance and hatred.  She wasn't judged for not showing emotion, she was judged for leaving her month old son to go out and party, for getting high, for being arrested on drug charges, for screaming at her mother and for making consistently bad choices.  She has no problem crying about herself and how hard her life is.  Or showing happiness when her soul-mate was telling her what a fantastic mother she is.  

4.  Jenelle isn't "struggling to make healthy choices".  She has had access to the best therapists (she saw several of them in previous seasons), has money to burn and no real responsibilities.  Barb has provided guidance, Jenelle just doesn't want to hear it. 

 

I'm not trying to sound like Barb's super-fan.  Heaven knows that she has made mistakes and is by no means a model parent.  But this whole "Jenelle is a victim of Barb's evilness" song and dance is getting old.  Jenelle has had 6 years to get custody back from her child-stealing-brainwashing witch of her mother but she hasn't.  Which I think says it all about her lack of effort and constant whinging e.g. it means f*ck all. 

[ghoulina]

7 hours ago, SPLAIN said:

There is more to just giving birth to children and telling them you love them. Barb is not an addict. Barb makes sure Jace is in his car seat. Barb has ensured Jace has a roof over his head. She has put him in activities such as karate and boy scouts. She has nurtured him, tended to him, and has not dumped him off with countless relatives. She has not had different men around Jace or even had a steady man in her life since Mike was kicked to the curb. She even made sure to get Jace properly diagnosed and on medication for his ADHD. She is not denying him the medical help he needs. I don't follow these people on social media, but I haven't seen anyone post any social media page of Barb where she is showing photos of herself as she comments how she has cleaned her house while proclaiming how much she loves Jace. I have not see a photo of her as she shows off her latest tattoo while bragging about going on vacation for the 20th time, nor have I seen any photos where she is proclaiming what a perfect grandmother she is and how life is grand. Barb has a life caring for Jace. I think she does a hell of a job and shows how  much she loves Jace in countless ways.

And I commend her for all of that. Again, I don't hate Barb. I don't think she is a horrible person. I do think she loves Jace and she tries to do right by him. But I also think she is a very toxic person in her own right. I think she is probably raising him better than she did her own kids, but I just really wish she wouldn't engage with her daughter the way she does. I wish she wouldn't let Jace be a pawn. He is going to have a lot of issues as an adult because of this constant fighting and back-and-forth with his mother. Barb allows all that. She is definitely better than Jenelle, but that's not saying much. I go back and forth on Barb a lot. She is very funny, and she sometimes will do things exactly right and time goes by and I forget. But then they'll have these fights and I get an idea of what it must have been like growing up with her. And while it doesn't excuse Jenelle, she's an adult and should have fixed herself by now, I do fear Jace is going to grow up learning the same harmful communication habits. I worry for him when HE gets to be a teenager and she really can just send him out of the house. 

[ArizonaGrown]

Okay i am going to somewhat defend Jenelle but definitely say what I see which is obviously very different from most others about Barb -  then I will leave it alone until the next time I probably have to watch Barb on any show about her - and her other daughter Ashleigh. The only reason I fell for this one was that my dvr recorded it and labeled it Teen Mom 2 or I would not have watched it. 

First of all I think Barb does not want to lose her spot on the show and realizes without Jace she would not be on the show anymore or very little and so would be her check from MTV. She also seems to get some sort of pleasure out of punishing Jenelle by holding him over her head and probably knows without Jace she may never see Jenelle which she seems to be addicted to the negative emotionally abusive relationship she has with her daughter. I often wonder how one can love the grandchild but loathe the child ? Barb does not show any concern or love for Jenelle who is her daughter by just once saying Jenelle I love you and am concerned about you what can I do to help you get through this? Or I am worried that you are maybe displaying behavior that makes me think you might be doing drugs again or that this new boyfriend is abusing you so open the door please to just let me know you are okay? And telling him that she loves her daughter and is worried so she wants to see her? Not yelling and calling names - or threatening to not let Jace come over again and last but not least saying he is the worst boyfriend ever. As a mom and a big sister I know I would not react like this woman unless I did not care for the person in the room and was just mad at them for not watching the children. When and where is her concern for her daughter - concern NOT anger. She should want to help Jenelle to be a better person and mother and want to help her do that instead of acting like she is in competition with her. 

Where is her love for Kaiser? Or even a bit of worry? No where to be seen - again not normal. If she thinks Jenelle is so unfit what about him? Her main problem with her boyfriends is that they are living off Jenelle and when they take too much of Jenelles attention from listening to Barb and start to give her negative input about Barb. Her words not mine. Not once have I heard her say I am worried that he will hurt her and or I want her to have someone wonderful and secure because she deserves it - like most moms would. 

How does she have the time to be looking for a companion ? Looks like she is spending an awful lot of time looking - hmmm hope Jace is at school and not with a friend or family member being babysat or that would mean that she is like Jenelle and leaving him with other people. 

Love the comments about Barb having been drinking that she said Jenelle was going to make when going to pick up Jace - making fun of the fact Jenelle would be mad at  her mom that had been drinking and was going to drive with Jace. Geez that is funny Barb - you are right you have it all under control and should be allowed to drink and drive with a 5 yr old cause youre wonderful and no way capable of making a mistake that will cause an accident while your grandson is in the car. What a way to put him first and protect him - and be stable and secure. Wine seems to be her constant companion maybe that is why she doesnt have a boyfriend herself or even a girlfriend that she can go anywhere with ? Strange that the producers and daughter Ashleigh are the only people they could drum up to go with Barb to the bars she was so happily scouting for her perfect companion in. Give me a break Pleasssseee the bar is the place to meet positive caring people to have around Jace - Barbs words from show verbatim. And her list of what she wants in a man is another sign that she is aiming high - has to have a job cause she doesnt want to pay for anything- have teeth and not be fat and dumpy probably cause she is in such good shape herself. This woman has no class and not a clue and will attract just that - anyone who does has some intelligence and will run from this annoying woman with so much baggage that she is like a anchor faster than they would consider saying hello to her. If you dont want to be judged dont put all your business and self out for others to judge - like she seems to love to do about everyone else. 

Everything I saw on the this show and have seen on TM2 has convinced me that Barb is for sure putting Jace first and will be able to provide a stable and secure home for him to thrive in - yea right I would have to be blind and deaf to buy this - for those who say Jenelle should have a plan for how she is to get him back or to give her mom - I ask what is Barbs plan after this show ends because she will NOT be able to support herself let alone 2 people on her walmart pay so what then? Maybe that is why she is so desperately putting so much effort into finding a "companion that has job and can pay so she doesnt have to" ? Like mother like daughter - I can not say this enough. 

Finally - a 16 yr old is not an adult - the parent is still suppose to "parent" them and I watched Barb do a bang up job with her daughter actually I never saw her doing anything other than yelling and putting on the poor me act - I would feel like a loser if my son acted like Jenelle at 16. Barb does not deserve the fame and adoration she receives in my opinion none of the other mothers on show act like her - i refuse to act like she is anything other than what I see. 

About Jace feeling embarrassed by this and the schoolyard remarks - he will resent the fact that his grandma kept him from his mom and that he had to be raised by a person that will be out of touch because she is so much older than the other parents (but tries to act like she is a hip 20yr old at 65yrs old) and has no clue. 

[alexa]

I feel differently about the Barbara/Jace thing than a lot of the recent posts.  I don't think she is perfect, but I think Jace can clearly see the difference between what he has with Barbara and what he has with Janelle.  I think he sees that Barbara provides him with a fairly stable and normal life, and I think it is clear when we see Barbara and Jace together on a normal occasion and Janelle isn't around.  They seem to live fairly peacefully and normally.  I don't agree that he will have issues with Barbara keeping him from Janelle on occasion because I think he feels glad to have someone to do that for him.  He might say things to please Janelle that he wants to be with his mom, but I don't have any doubts he would be just fine without her, and he knows it...he knows his stability comes from his real home.  Not the one that Janelle and Dave provide for him.  

[DangerousMinds]

Why can't Barb take some time to look for a companion when Jenelle has done nothing but??? Many kids live with grandparents or other relatives, and certainly many kids have older parents (many, many older dads). This is irrelevent, IMO. He knows he is loved and has a stable home with Barb. He will always be able to watch this show to confirm that and see what a psycho his mother was/is.

[ghoulina]

13 minutes ago, alexa said:

I don't agree that he will have issues with Barbara keeping him from Janelle on occasion because I think he feels glad to have someone to do that for him.  He might say things to please Janelle that he wants to be with his mom, but I don't have any doubts he would be just fine without her, and he knows it...he knows his stability comes from his real home.  Not the one that Janelle and Dave provide for him.  

I don't think Jace is going to have issues about being kept from Jenelle. If I were Barb, I would have cut off all ties. I don't think Jenelle has contributed one positive thing to that boy's life. Quite the opposite. Where I think the issues will arise is from the back and forth and confusion. They have not set custody schedule in place. If they do, they don't adhere to it. Jace will see Jenelle on weekends for months on end. Then Barb and Jenelle have a big fight, and Barb tells Jenelle - "you'll never see Jace again!" Then the child is held hostage until things are smoothed over. Then it's back over there, with whatever Neanderthal she has stomping around that weekend. And they constantly talk about the custody issue in front of Jace, so he's probably always nervous that the day will come when he has to live with her permanently. It's a totally fucked up situation and I just worry that Jace is going to develop a lot of anxiety and insecurity because of it. 

[Tatum]

1 hour ago, ArizonaGrown said:

 

About Jace feeling embarrassed by this and the schoolyard remarks - he will resent the fact that his grandma kept him from his mom

This comment does not make sense based on what we've seen. Barb does not keep him away from Jenelle. Jenelle cancels visits with him so she can go on vacation. Jenelle starts court proceedings to get him back and then doesn't follow through. Jenelle intentionally gets pregnant with another guy and Jace falls to the wayside. If Jenelle truly wanted Jace back, she would have him by now. She wants the credit for being his mom without doing any of the work of raising him. 

Edited July 14, 2016 by Tatum

[DangerousMinds]

1 hour ago, ArizonaGrown said:

 I often wonder how one can love the grandchild but loathe the child ?

Everything I saw on the this show and have seen on TM2 has convinced me that Barb is for sure putting Jace first and will be able to provide a stable and secure home for him to thrive in - yea right I would have to be blind and deaf to buy this - for those who say Jenelle should have a plan for how she is to get him back or to give her mom - I ask what is Barbs plan after this show ends because she will NOT be able to support herself let alone 2 people on her walmart pay so what then? Maybe that is why she is so desperately putting so much effort into finding a "companion that has job and can pay so she doesnt have to" ? Like mother like daughter - I can not say this enough. 

 

1. Loathe the child? Well, it's sociopathic Jenelle. In any case, I do think Barbara loves her daughter or she would have given up on her long ago.

2. Barbara supported her kids before this show, by working full-time. Something Jenelle has never done nor do I see her being capable of doing. I also assume she has been smart enough to have saved some of her teen mom money over these past years. She recently bought a new house, so she is stable there.

[Chicken Wing]

Quote

If Jenelle truly wanted Jace back, she would have him by now.

This. Personally, I don't think Jenelle is the better option for Jace. Like most, I don't think Barbara is the greatest parental figure for him and goodness knows she screwed up badly enough with her own kids, but when push comes to shove Jace has had and will have a more stable life with her than he would in Jenelle's custody. BUT, in the eyes of the court, Jenelle probably wouldn't be seen as such a mess, such an unfit parent that she ought to be denied having custody reverted back if she requested. I do believe that if Jenelle actually took Barbara to court and petitioned to have custody of Jace back, she would probably win. The only reason she doesn't have custody is because she still, all these years later, has not bothered to go to court and actually get this done. For all her ranting and raving and threatening Barbara to take her court, she never follows through, never bothers to petition her case, never actually tries to get her damn kid back. Because she doesn't really want custody. I have always believed that. She doesn't want full custody of Jace. I think she loves him, deep down I believe she does love her son and wants to be in his life and get to see him, but I think she rather prefers the arrangement they've had all these years where Barbara is ultimately responsible and Jenelle steps in as needed or, as is more often the case, as is convenient for her. So why rock that boat? Why go to the trouble when things are fine and cozy for Jenelle the way they are, where she can spend time with Jace on weekends and have the rest of her days mostly free? (And how many days a week does Kaiser spend with someone else?) No, if Jenelle really wanted Jace back, if this was important to her, she would do it. No excuses, no hemming and hawing, no "things are busy right now so I'm going to put off the custody thing for now" bullshit. Just get your child back. But she doesn't. And now it might even be too late. Because now, the only reason she might be denied is because we're at the point where Jace is so old, and has lived in the one household for so long, that it might be more disruptive to his well-being to switch him now. Now, they might be better off waiting until Jace is 12 or 13 and can make an informed, personal choice on his own about who he wants to live with.

Quote

Maybe that is why she is so desperately putting so much effort into finding a "companion that has job and can pay so she doesnt have to" ? 

I think it's more that she, like any rational-minded woman of a mature age, is not interested in hooking up with a grown-ass man who has no job and will exist only to loaf on her couch all day and siphon her money like a deadbeat. Really, I can't think of very many 60-something women (or 30-something like me, for that matter) who are in the market for unemployed leeches for boyfriends. "Stable job" or otherwise "having his own income" is kind of a prerequisite.

Edited July 14, 2016 by Chicken Wing

[DangerousMinds]

I don't think Jenelle is capable of loving anyone other than herself.

[Tatum]

15 minutes ago, Chicken Wing said:

 I do believe that if Jenelle actually took Barbara to court and petitioned to have custody of Jace back, she would probably win. The only reason she doesn't have custody is because she still, all these years later, has not bothered to go to court and actually get this done.

Not only do I think this is true, I think Barb wants Jenelle to clean up her life and take Jace back. I think Barb would much rather be the grandma than the mom. Remember in an early season when Jenelle stole from Barb, and Barb was discussing her options with a lawyer. The lawyer said that Barb could press charges against Jenelle for stealing, and then she wouldn't be responsible for any charges Jenelle racked up on Barb's stolen card, but if Jenelle had that on her record she might have trouble getting a job. If she couldn't get a job, she couldn't support Jace (this was before the TM checks were in the 6 figures). If Barb's hope was that Jenelle would end up raising her own son, Barb's best bet was to not press charges and just pay off the cards herself. Obviously, that was a gamble that did not work out.

 

You know what would have really convinced me that Jenelle gave a shit about her kid? If she had stayed home to feed him instead of going out drinking and trawling for guys when Jace was a week old. Jace would have starved and sat in his own filth if not for Barb, because his selfish, despicable mother couldn't bother to even meet his basic needs if it meant giving up her party time.

[Uncle JUICE]

2 hours ago, ArizonaGrown said:

Barb does not show any concern or love for Jenelle who is her daughter by just once saying Jenelle I love you and am concerned about you what can I do to help you get through this? Or I am worried that you are maybe displaying behavior that makes me think you might be doing drugs again or that this new boyfriend is abusing you so open the door please to just let me know you are okay? And telling him that she loves her daughter and is worried so she wants to see her? Not yelling and calling names - or threatening to not let Jace come over again and last but not least saying he is the worst boyfriend ever. As a mom and a big sister I know I would not react like this woman unless I did not care for the person in the room and was just mad at them for not watching the children. When and where is her concern for her daughter - concern NOT anger. She should want to help Jenelle to be a better person and mother and want to help her do that instead of acting like she is in competition with her. 

Where is her love for Kaiser? Or even a bit of worry? No where to be seen - again not normal. If she thinks Jenelle is so unfit what about him? Her main problem with her boyfriends is that they are living off Jenelle and when they take too much of Jenelles attention from listening to Barb and start to give her negative input about Barb. Her words not mine. Not once have I heard her say I am worried that he will hurt her and or I want her to have someone wonderful and secure because she deserves it - like most moms would. 

 

As to the first paragraph, didn't EXACTLY that scene happen during the Keifer season? Right before she and Mike had to basically storm the shithole house they were staying at in order to make sure they hadn't OD'd? And she's not really threatening not to let Jace go see his mom, she's got to say that because she's the custodian and it's her legal obligation to do what's in the best interest of the child in her care. If Jenelle feels like that's NOT what Barb's doing, then she's free to pursue legal remedy (it's not like she doesn't have the money or the time). ETA: I loved that they were in that house arguing that it's a totally great place for Jace, while there's a drill press and tool kit set on the kitchen counter for the manufacture of drug paraphenelia. Which as I recall was made out of treated wood and got people sick. I hope Keifer's on Etsy. Seriously

As far as Kaiser's concerned, Jenelle and Nathan were pretty explicit, they didn't want Kaiser having very much to do with Barb, so her relationship with Kaiser is nowhere near the relationship she has with the six year old she's raised since he was born. That's by design. And she's absolutely said she's afraid someone will hurt Jenelle, both with Nathan and with the other guy who almost ran her over, I don't remember if it was Gary or Courtland. Barb's got a lot of precedent for being jumpy about Jenelle's boyfriends, and can hardly be blamed if she's too frustrated to keep trying the nice-lady approach after boyfriend number 22, baby daddy #3 exhibits some early behaviors that would point toward abuse, and rather says "I KEEP TELLING YOU."

I'm not on the St. Barbara train, but to couch it as you did seems strange to me. Of course she wants the MTV money, but at least her MTV money is going directly to raising Jace (Walmart isn't doing that). Jenelle's is going to further her party lifestyle. 

Edited July 14, 2016 by Uncle JUICE

[Mkay]

My 57 year old mother wants companionship because she is lonely.  I'd want my significant other to have all his teeth , too. Personal preference. I think, like others have mentioned, she doesn't want some bum who lays around and expects Barbra to pay for it all (like Jenelle). She didn't say she wanted marriage. Same with my mom. She just wants someone now that her kids are grown and doing things with their own kids. Barbara can't even finish a sentence to be able to tell Jenelle "I'm concerned about you" before Jenelle starts screaming bloody murder and telling Barbara  to shut up. I'd move heaven and earth to get my child back. Jenelle only screams about it instead of  actually doing something.  If it was all about the fame and show for Barbara, I don't think she would still be working at Wal-Mart. 

 

I believe eve this was filmed in March or end of February. Jenelle mentions her spring break trip coming up. This would also coincide with Barbara's scheduled trip to go see Ashley and the big fight where Jenelle screams about nurturing. Hahaha

Edited July 14, 2016 by Mkay

[NannyBails]

So my parents got divorced when I was 13.  My mother hated my father (still does 40 years later) and constantly badmouthed him.  She even did the "I'm going to send you back to him!" whenever I did something she didn't like.   I attribute her behavior to several things, including a lack of emotional intelligence.   And I'm wondering if that's part of the problem for most of the moms on these shows.

Maybe I'm not using the term "emotional intelligence" correctly, so here's what I mean:  the ability to have interpersonal interactions with people you don't like while also maintaining control of your words and emotions; the ability to interact with people whom you can't stand but not show that you can't stand them;  the ability to disagree while not making the other person wrong.

I don't see Barb as perfect by any means.  I don't see her as evil, either.  I see her in a situation that's beyond her skill level.  This type of behavior was probably modeled for her by her own parents, who knows?   I can only share my family history and the fact that my mother's mother was also very passive aggressive and also used inappropriate threats when she was angry.  My mother had to learn it from somewhere.

Life would have been better for me if my mom had gone to therapy.  Life would be better for Jace if Barb would go to therapy.  It does seem like she is trying a bit ... I saw that in the scene when she was on the phone and didn't want to engage, then got drawn into it, then got herself out of it.  

I really don't like how any of these moms (and Barb) put the kids in the middle with their stupid questioning of the kids.  Since almost all of them do this, I'm wondering if it's producer-driven?

And on another note:  I was unimpressed by Barb's producer.  I found her to be inappropriately giggly and just a little off somehow, but I can't put my finger on how.

[Darknight]

3 hours ago, ArizonaGrown said:

Okay i am going to somewhat defend Jenelle but definitely say what I see which is obviously very different from most others about Barb -  then I will leave it alone until the next time I probably have to watch Barb on any show about her - and her other daughter Ashleigh. The only reason I fell for this one was that my dvr recorded it and labeled it Teen Mom 2 or I would not have watched it. 

First of all I think Barb does not want to lose her spot on the show and realizes without Jace she would not be on the show anymore or very little and so would be her check from MTV. She also seems to get some sort of pleasure out of punishing Jenelle by holding him over her head and probably knows without Jace she may never see Jenelle which she seems to be addicted to the negative emotionally abusive relationship she has with her daughter. I often wonder how one can love the grandchild but loathe the child ? Barb does not show any concern or love for Jenelle who is her daughter by just once saying Jenelle I love you and am concerned about you what can I do to help you get through this? Or I am worried that you are maybe displaying behavior that makes me think you might be doing drugs again or that this new boyfriend is abusing you so open the door please to just let me know you are okay? And telling him that she loves her daughter and is worried so she wants to see her? Not yelling and calling names - or threatening to not let Jace come over again and last but not least saying he is the worst boyfriend ever. As a mom and a big sister I know I would not react like this woman unless I did not care for the person in the room and was just mad at them for not watching the children. When and where is her concern for her daughter - concern NOT anger. She should want to help Jenelle to be a better person and mother and want to help her do that instead of acting like she is in competition with her. 

Where is her love for Kaiser? Or even a bit of worry? No where to be seen - again not normal. If she thinks Jenelle is so unfit what about him? Her main problem with her boyfriends is that they are living off Jenelle and when they take too much of Jenelles attention from listening to Barb and start to give her negative input about Barb. Her words not mine. Not once have I heard her say I am worried that he will hurt her and or I want her to have someone wonderful and secure because she deserves it - like most moms would. 

How does she have the time to be looking for a companion ? Looks like she is spending an awful lot of time looking - hmmm hope Jace is at school and not with a friend or family member being babysat or that would mean that she is like Jenelle and leaving him with other people. 

Love the comments about Barb having been drinking that she said Jenelle was going to make when going to pick up Jace - making fun of the fact Jenelle would be mad at  her mom that had been drinking and was going to drive with Jace. Geez that is funny Barb - you are right you have it all under control and should be allowed to drink and drive with a 5 yr old cause youre wonderful and no way capable of making a mistake that will cause an accident while your grandson is in the car. What a way to put him first and protect him - and be stable and secure. Wine seems to be her constant companion maybe that is why she doesnt have a boyfriend herself or even a girlfriend that she can go anywhere with ? Strange that the producers and daughter Ashleigh are the only people they could drum up to go with Barb to the bars she was so happily scouting for her perfect companion in. Give me a break Pleasssseee the bar is the place to meet positive caring people to have around Jace - Barbs words from show verbatim. And her list of what she wants in a man is another sign that she is aiming high - has to have a job cause she doesnt want to pay for anything- have teeth and not be fat and dumpy probably cause she is in such good shape herself. This woman has no class and not a clue and will attract just that - anyone who does has some intelligence and will run from this annoying woman with so much baggage that she is like a anchor faster than they would consider saying hello to her. If you dont want to be judged dont put all your business and self out for others to judge - like she seems to love to do about everyone else. 

Everything I saw on the this show and have seen on TM2 has convinced me that Barb is for sure putting Jace first and will be able to provide a stable and secure home for him to thrive in - yea right I would have to be blind and deaf to buy this - for those who say Jenelle should have a plan for how she is to get him back or to give her mom - I ask what is Barbs plan after this show ends because she will NOT be able to support herself let alone 2 people on her walmart pay so what then? Maybe that is why she is so desperately putting so much effort into finding a "companion that has job and can pay so she doesnt have to" ? Like mother like daughter - I can not say this enough. 

Finally - a 16 yr old is not an adult - the parent is still suppose to "parent" them and I watched Barb do a bang up job with her daughter actually I never saw her doing anything other than yelling and putting on the poor me act - I would feel like a loser if my son acted like Jenelle at 16. Barb does not deserve the fame and adoration she receives in my opinion none of the other mothers on show act like her - i refuse to act like she is anything other than what I see. 

About Jace feeling embarrassed by this and the schoolyard remarks - he will resent the fact that his grandma kept him from his mom and that he had to be raised by a person that will be out of touch because she is so much older than the other parents (but tries to act like she is a hip 20yr old at 65yrs old) and has no clue. 

What if Jace resents Babs for not keeping Jenelle away? I like that Babs won't settle for anyone. I've seen on more than one occasion Babs bending over backwards for Jenelle. When she was addicted to drugs, trying to force her to get a job and be there for Jace. Told her to put Jace up for adoption. As for Kaiser. Nathan said he didn't want Babs around him. And what if she gets attached to the roll and now she's 60 raising two of her grand kids without help. The roll was born because Nathan and Jenelle are two idiots. He should've been placed for adoption. I waited Jenelle's 16 and pregnant episode. That girl is a bitch. Babs threw her a baby shower she still bitches. Babs told her she had to work and needed her to watch Jace. She said she doesn't have time. She even said Jace doesn't need her because he has Babs. 

[Dopeydwarf]

 Upthread, I read where someone felt the need to defend Jennelle, and said that Barb may be trying to keep Jace because of the money.  Wow.  That sounds like something Jenelle would say. Barb has had the little guy for years, and I'm sure she loves him, and he is an integral part of her life.  

  

I think Barb is doing the best she can .   But i think if she loses Jace to Jenelle ( that Jennelle really decides to take care of him), she is gong to be heartbroken. They are closely bonded.  As far as I'm concerned, Barb is his mom.

[Chicken Wing]

Quote

I don't see Barb as perfect by any means.  I don't see her as evil, either.  I see her in a situation that's beyond her skill level.  

I feel the same way. I think she tries and she does the best she can with what she knows. It's just that her best isn't all that great -- it's pretty poor sometimes, actually -- but if that's all she knows or all she was taught from her life and personal experiences I can't blame her for it. She can do better, but I think she's at an "old dog, new tricks" place in her life at this point. :)

[SPLAIN]

Peeps, I think we should remember the stirring of the pot that happened with the "Adam is a victim" topic. JMO.

Quote

 I think it's quite likely all 3 of her kids were raised in a very similarly toxic environment and I just don't want to see this cycle continue.

Considering Barb made it clear there was domestic violence going on, it is a safe bet to assume the environment was toxic. I know you don't hate Barb. I dislike the things you mentioned as well. Overall, Barb is not a bad parent or caretaker. She is a parent and caretaker who falters to some of her defense mechanisms that she surely learned from her DV days. Many people who are victims of DV don't always realize how they resort to old behaviors and patterns. It comes to them as they become defensive, scared, hurt or angry. I see this in Jenelle. I watch Jenelle and wonder how many of the things she has said or yelled at Barb or any one of her various boyfriends were actually things that were said to her mother by her father or vice-versa. It doesn't give her a pass, just like I don't give Barb a pass, but one can certainly believe that growing up in a home where DV occurred on a constant basis, has affected the entire family.  

Quote

I'm not on the St. Barbara train

I didn't realize there was one. 

Barb is no saint. No one is by any means. Barb loves Jace and cares dearly for him. If I could, I'd go buy Barb lunch and have a good time sharing some wine with her. There is more to that woman than being this imperfect person who engages in battles with Jenelle. 

Something Jenelle and Barb have in common is that they both seem to seek each other's love. They have both said it and yelled at each other  how each of them feels about how the other is hurting them. Moreso, it is Jenelle who has hurt Barb, but in her mind she feels Barb doesn't care for her. She has screamed at her beloved mother how much she wishes she was dead and how much she hates her. Barb has cried asking why Jenelle is mean to her. The very words we hear Jenelle say to all of her boyfriends. Barb surely needs help and therapy. For all we know, she may be receiving help. I also have the mindset to know that therapy is not a miracle cure. It can take years to work through years of dysfunction and toxicity. 

4 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

Why can't Barb take some time to look for a companion when Jenelle has done nothing but??? Many kids live with grandparents or other relatives, and certainly many kids have older parents (many, many older dads). This is irrelevent, IMO. He knows he is loved and has a stable home with Barb. He will always be able to watch this show to confirm that and see what a psycho his mother was/is.

Preach!!

It is extremely offensive to imply Jace will be embarrassed because Barb is his grandmother considering there are many grandparents who are raising children for many reasons. I wouldn't doubt Jace has school mates who may come from a home where there is only one parent or where grandparents are involved. We also live in a world where parents are not always the traditional mother and father. Any grandparent who raises a child is not, and should not be seen as an embarrassment and I hope to God people don't really believe such a thing and if there are, that is ignorant.

What should be an embarrassment, is the so-called parent who had one child (Jace), couldn't bother raising him and signed him over to her mother to care for, and has gone off and had another child (Kaiser) with another loser.  

Edited July 14, 2016 by SPLAIN

[Christina87]

Regarding Kaiser, I think Barbara consciously avoids him as a defense mechanism. Remember when Jenelle and Nathan announced their plans to get pregnant and she immediately said, "I'm not taking care of another one"? I'm sure she believes Jenelle is an unfit mother, and her heart breaks for Kaiser, but realistically she has no custody rights to him. It must be a tough situation for her. 

[ghoulina]

14 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

Regarding Kaiser, I think Barbara consciously avoids him as a defense mechanism. Remember when Jenelle and Nathan announced their plans to get pregnant and she immediately said, "I'm not taking care of another one"? I'm sure she believes Jenelle is an unfit mother, and her heart breaks for Kaiser, but realistically she has no custody rights to him. It must be a tough situation for her. 

I agree with this. And I do recognize the hard position grandparents are put in when their own kids are crap parents. Tough love is great and all, but it can't be easy to to shut out the innocent baby. While I think Barb has done a lot of toxic things in the raising of Jace, I know she loves that kid and her fear and sadness over losing him is very very real. There's no way in hell she wants to go through that again. 

You know, it's a really messed up situation. I know Jenelle is the bio mother, but at this point, I feel like even if she HAD gotten herself really and truly together, it's almost too late. The kid has been living with Barb for 6+ years. If Jenelle did get custody, can you imagine the upheaval that would cause him? At what point do we say - he has lived too long with this woman to take him from her? Will he get any say in the matter? 

Just a mess. 

[teapot]

12 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I agree with this. And I do recognize the hard position grandparents are put in when their own kids are crap parents. Tough love is great and all, but it can't be easy to to shut out the innocent baby. While I think Barb has done a lot of toxic things in the raising of Jace, I know she loves that kid and her fear and sadness over losing him is very very real. There's no way in hell she wants to go through that again. 

You know, it's a really messed up situation. I know Jenelle is the bio mother, but at this point, I feel like even if she HAD gotten herself really and truly together, it's almost too late. The kid has been living with Barb for 6+ years. If Jenelle did get custody, can you imagine the upheaval that would cause him? At what point do we say - he has lived too long with this woman to take him from her? Will he get any say in the matter? 

Just a mess. 

I bet he plays them off one another when he's older (if Barb is still in good health, that is...)

I can't see him having a good relationship w/his Mom and boyfriend of the year living w/them full-time.

[sunsheyen]

Has Jenelle's Twitter fanbase found Previously.tv?

[BitterApple]

11 minutes ago, sunsheyen said:

Has Jenelle's Twitter fanbase found Previously.tv?

I don't think so. When you start seeing posts rife with spelling errors, poor grammar and an absence of logic, then you'll know Jenelle's minions are on the scene. 

[HeySandyStrange]

Granted Barb is no saint, but I'm just not seeing the accusations being brought against her. She's only in it for the money? Well, on that token, all the moms, dads, and grandparents that appear on this show are in it for the money, but it hasn't stopped most of them from loving and caring for the children involved. In fact, Jenelle is the only one who hasn't even attempted to raise the child that landed her the TM2 lottery in the first place. And as far as I know, she pays little to no child support, thus none of her share is going to Jace, while Barb has made sure to use her TM2 money to insure Jace has food, shelter, and what have you. And it has been Jenelle, on several occasions, that has threatened to rip Jace away from Barb and keep her from seeing him, not the other way around. I agree with others who've said if anything Jace would've benefited from Jenelle being cut out of their lives.

And so what if Barb wants a friends with benefits? Until she moves every other internet hookup in with Jace and her, she can do damn well what she pleases within reason. I doubt she wants a live in, anyway, or she'd probably have done it by now.

[Blissfool]

5 hours ago, SPLAIN said:

 

It is extremely offensive to imply Jace will be embarrassed because Barb is his grandmother considering there are many grandparents who are raising children for many reasons. I wouldn't doubt Jace has school mates who may come from a home where there is only one parent or where grandparents are involved. We also live in a world where parents are not always the traditional mother and father. Any grandparent who raises a child is not, and should not be seen as an embarrassment and I hope to God people don't really believe such a thing and if there are, that is ignorant.

 

Being an elementary school teacher, i can attest to this fact. Every year i have a few students who live with only mom and grandma. I also have students that live with grandma only. This year i had two students like this and, no, mom was not dead OR in jail. These students are not embarrassed or ashamed. They actually speak highly of their "other mom" and the love is evident. 

[luvly]

On 7/13/2016 at 8:06 PM, ArizonaGrown said:

Also if Barb thinks that the show ruined Jenelles life somehow why didnt she take her off the show and not allow it to continue when Jenelle was 16? 

Because not everyone who was on 16 & Pregnant was actually 16 at the time? Jenelle was already 18 by the time her 16&P episode aired and 19 when TM2 started taping. Barbara lost her legal ability to take Jenelle off the show before Jenelle even got her first taste of D-list fame.

[Christina87]

Plus most of them who got pregnant at 16 had their child at 17, and then MTV and ordered and taped a first season...then it aired several months later. They would definitely have been 18 by the time it aired. 

[Scarlett45]

I have a cousin that was raised similarly as Jace, as in "raised by her paternal grandparents because her bio parents (still together) were such a mess". Her paternal grandparents took her when she was about 2, raised her, educated her etc, when my Mom first started dating my father, she though that she was her grandparents' "menopause baby" as she lived with them and was with them 24/7, not realizing the situation. When she was about 9 her parents said they were having another baby, and her grandparents said they were absolutely NOT raising that one too. Thankfully both cousins turned out okay, but I think she thanks her lucky stars her grandparents raised her and not her Mom/Dad as she had a much easier life than her younger sister having to deal with that household. Her parents did "mellow" with age, and minimally got their shit together, but her baby sister didn't have the benefit of the stable upbringing she had. (The sisters are close, and the grandparents have a relationship with both girls, a "grandparent" relationship with the younger as they didnt raise her.)

 

There is a lot of variables that determine how someone turns out, but I do think there is a strong chance Jace will thank his lucky stars Barb took him and gave him love and stability, compared to how Kaiser will grow up. I do not doubt those that grow up surrounded by DV can lead fulfilling productive lives, but I am glad Jace won't have to witness that the way Jenelle did. IMO Barb is so scared for Jenelle because she WAS a victim of DV and can see the signs a mile away. She doesn't want to get the call that one of those men killed her child or Kaiser. I know thats probably her worst fear, and she feels tremendous amounts of guilt because her kids had to see her in that type of situation growing up, and if something like that happened to Jenelle she would never forgive herself. 

Edited July 15, 2016 by Scarlett45