S09.E14: The Forever Decision

[Jeanne222]

54 minutes ago, OnTime said:

He has said it would leave scars that would be worse.  He does look better with a beard.

I don't know about that.  It seems these new plastic surgeons do really good work!  Look at Carrie Underwood.  You'd never know how many stitches she had in her face from her fall!

I think those moles were a huge turnoff for Jamie at the alter.

[Neurochick]

1 hour ago, watchingtvaddict said:

But, he did humiliate her on TV with his lies. Iris thought they were doing good, compatible and on the same re: their marriage. Now. She looks like a fool who doesn’t know how to read the signs because Keith was honest in talking heads about his feelings but didn’t talk about any of the issues face to face 

I don't know.  I knew that Keith liked Iris like an older brother likes his little sister.  Iris friend zoned herself IMO.

I don't think Matt is a psychopath/sociopath or anything diagnosable.  I think Matt came on this show because he thought it was another bullshit dating show like The Bachelor/Flava of Love/Rock of Love/Are you the one?/Temptation Island, shows where people go on to promote themselves, not find love.  The problem was that many who do this show take is seriously, and Amber took it very seriously.  

I would never go on a reality show to find love, and most people I know feel the same way,  I don't think most folks on this board would go on a show like Married at First Sight either.  Matt was probably like, "why the fuck are any of you taking this nonsense seriously?"

I don't think Matt is scum because he didn't take this shit show seriously, I think Matt is scum because when he realized Amber was taking it seriously, he didn't take her aside and tell her that HE didn't take the show seriously and wanted out.  Amber would have been hurt, but she probably would have felt better that Matt was honest. 

Instead Matt was an asshole and didn't promote himself well at all.🤢

[humbleopinion]

Living dead

Bittersweet

Jumbo shrimp

Divorced Virgin

[Alexander Pope]

1 minute ago, humbleopinion said:

Living dead

Bittersweet

Jumbo shrimp

Divorced Virgin

You need to tell George Carlin about that  last one!

[humbleopinion]

Betcha only 2 out of 10 readers of this forum know who George Carlin was.....

[luckylou]

8 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Someone in another thread said that Iris required emergency surgery because the quarter got lodged, which makes sense, since she said only her mother and the doctors know about it.  Until I knew that, it seemed like a REALLY stupid "secret"--hey, as an adult I swallowed a pinball because I was rolling it around in my mouth while lying on my back, and I would never consider that a secret.  But if the consequences of her swallowing the quarter were as severe as they sound, then she might be ashamed or embarrassed that her stupidity led to such a big deal, and she could understandably not want other people to know, and it's therefore a secret.  She's so uptight I could see that happening. 

In that case, seems as though Iris may have been the victim of the film editor...surely she would have talked about the surgery to Keith, since that is a major part of the story, which seems to me to change the impact of the story completely.  I wonder how much of our commentary is based on misleading edits.

Maybe she did not go on and on about her virginity...maybe the show was edited so that she seems to be harping on it.  

And what about the other couples?  Maybe all of our judgments have been influenced by unfair editing,

i have been defending Keith, but it does seem he might have given Iris a heads up before the final show ...

Edited September 14, 2019 by luckylou

[Crazy Bird Lady]

1 hour ago, humbleopinion said:

Betcha only 2 out of 10 readers of this forum know who George Carlin was.....

I dunno. That comic routine in which he used the word "fuck" as adjective, adverb, noun, and verb... I don't see how that could ever fade into obscurity. 

But then again... maybe Beth and/or Jamie could find even more creative ways to use the "f word" (lol). 

Edited September 14, 2019 by Crazy Bird Lady

[Kdawg82]

4 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

like Doug but have always wondered why he doesn't get those three ugly moles on his face  removed.  Surely everybody, along with me, see them and wonder???

I understand he calls one of them Jamie?

[luckylou]

@Crazy Bird Lady 

I know who George Carlin is...

[MajorNelson]

6 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Your comment reminded me that I had a friend who was a vice-president at a bank years ago.  Her dad was proudly telling everyone that this daughter was vice-president, and she would just roll her eyes because everybody at the bank was a vice-president.

So I did some searching to see if my memory was correct, and I found an interesting article called "Your Charlotte bank VP title doesn’t really mean much." 

https://www.charlotteagenda.com/26103/your-charlotte-bank-vp-title-doesnt-really-mean-much/

I'll check that out, and I too have seen fairly meaningless VP titles.  I'll give him credit, that he had done some real handson work before he made VP.

[LennieBriscoe]

16 hours ago, Lindz said:

Uhhhhhhhh. How about, "I've been faking & misleading you since ______. Sorry. Not sorry. I'm TRASH." To start. NOT vague, bs statements. I CAN'T STAND THAT SH*T! It's unacceptable, EXPLAIN what you're saying. Cite events, support what you're saying so we're CRYSTAL CLEAR. 😂

Keith isn't in love with Iris, period.

And if he WERE in love, THAT would be equally difficult to "cite events, support" for. 

If emotions were debate material, we wouldn't have poetry or song. 

Edited September 14, 2019 by LennieBriscoe

[LennieBriscoe]

4 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Betcha only 2 out of 10 readers of this forum know who George Carlin was.....

I imagine the number is closer to 9 out of 10. We're a funny bunch ourselves, and much wit comes from experience (aka "age")!

[LennieBriscoe]

14 hours ago, Crazy Bird Lady said:

1) It's the "Forever Decision" (or Decision Day, or "D-Day") because the so-called "experts," the shared wedding day and the paid-for 'group' honeymoon, the production crew and cameras, the obligatory shared ('free') block of temporary-living apartments, and the shared "mini-moon" (all in the same 'vacation' house rented by MAFS), etc. --finally go away.

It's each spouse's chance to finally choose to be married --or not. After that, the remaining couples are (at least theoretically) like other newly-married couples, handling their own finances and making their own decisions [almost] privately in an real marriage. 

2) With Greg and Deonna, I think that's possible --but if they do stay married, Deonna will continue to be the boss of everything in their relationship.

3) Jamie and Elizabeth: I hope not!!  I seriously think it's likely that one of them will physically abuse and/or try to kill the other one (probably Jamie, because Beth won't "put out" when he demands it).

You quoted me as asking the question "Why do they call it 'Forever Decision'...?" But I RESPONDED to that query posted by Ontime.

[moonxyz]

Going against the grain here. I don't like Keith. He's not the consumate gentleman beyond reproach.

He's very wishy washy. Overly concerned about creating a gentleman narrative rather than being honest.

No kuddos from me. Tell her you dislike her. Tell the experts you don't like her. Be real dude.

Also, I don't hate Iris as much as you guys do. She's entitled to follow her religion. She's entitled to not want to have sex. Even married women are not obliged to have sex.

Sex positive culture is all the rage but virgins shouldn't be burned to the stake. Tolerance goes both ways.

And just how horrible and terrible she is as a person?

- Won't share lemonade with his friends

-Won't do the sex dice game. But did the edibles and soca dance

-Swallowed a quarter story.

Is that it? Seems pretty tame to me.

[trimthatfat]

I am so glad Keith opted for divorce. Whether Keith sucks or Iris is too immature, they were not compatible. Period. It doesn’t make either of them bad people. Too many people stay in hopeless relationships because they don’t want to hurt another person or because they don’t want to admit the relationship isn’t working. Could Keith have told Iris that he isn’t attracted to her and doesn’t like her off-camera...sure? But it would have been incredibly rude. He wanted a divorce and that’s that.

Iris can take this time to now find the right man for her. I think it’s ridiculous she chose to do this kind of show in the first place. Her mom implied that Iris’s relationships tend not to end well and I think it because Iris has many emotional issues to figure out. I am a big supporter of therapy and think she would have been better off seeing a therapist, not signing up for this show. She seems like a sweet person with a quirky personality who just needs to work through some emotional issues.

Keith clearly checked out a while ago. I think the condom situation was the beginning of the end. Also, if this show is going to pair a virgin with someone with experience, they need to ask the individuals in the relationship if they are okay with that before pairing them. If asked during the interview process, I’m sure Keith would have said early on that he would prefer a non-virgin or at the very least, someone who is more open-minded. I recall Jamie Otis didn’t want to have sex with Doug Hefner on their season, but she slowly opened herself up to him. They cuddled, they kissed, etc. Iris wasn’t ready for that. When Keith said he liked doggy style during sex, Iris had a very immature reaction. I also think that influenced Keith’s decision and made him realize the situation was going to require way more patience than he has. Greg is a sweetheart and I think even he would have struggled tremendously in this area as well.

[Hangin Out]

18 hours ago, OnTime said:

I think it is time to cancel "Couples Couch".

What does anyone else think?

I think YES.  There’s too many things.  The show, couples couch, after the show,Unfiltered, etc.  I still can’t find Big Red’s new brown hair.  Where is it?  Under what title ?  Is it attached after one of the episodes?

[sasha206]

11 hours ago, Neurochick said:

I don't know.  I knew that Keith liked Iris like an older brother likes his little sister.  Iris friend zoned herself IMO.

I don't think Matt is a psychopath/sociopath or anything diagnosable.  I think Matt came on this show because he thought it was another bullshit dating show like The Bachelor/Flava of Love/Rock of Love/Are you the one?/Temptation Island, shows where people go on to promote themselves, not find love.  The problem was that many who do this show take is seriously, and Amber took it very seriously.  

I would never go on a reality show to find love, and most people I know feel the same way,  I don't think most folks on this board would go on a show like Married at First Sight either.  Matt was probably like, "why the fuck are any of you taking this nonsense seriously?"

I don't think Matt is scum because he didn't take this shit show seriously, I think Matt is scum because when he realized Amber was taking it seriously, he didn't take her aside and tell her that HE didn't take the show seriously and wanted out.  Amber would have been hurt, but she probably would have felt better that Matt was honest. 

Instead Matt was an asshole and didn't promote himself well at all.🤢

Matt is an asshole, but wow, I just can't get too angry over him. This is a show where strangers, set up by a production team to create drama, get married to someone they don't know.  Someone not taking a marriage seriously doesn't bother me because it's a fucking sham to begin with.  I'm almost more concerned with these idiots that go on a reality show to find love -- esp. with this premise!  

Unless Amber is a different person than what we've seen on the show, I couldn't last five minutes in her presence I find her so child-like, irritating, needy.  If the person some "experts" set me up with couldn't let me have a few minutes of peace while I'm out with a friend w/o calling me 4 times before 10:30, I would have wanted to call it quits right then.  i suspect the producers loved the drama of Matt and Amber and didn't mind his shenanigans.  They'd rather the couples do whatever versus quitting the show before the finale.  I don't think she was ever led on to believe that there was a chance they could fall in love.  

Amber is so childish that I think the only attraction she had to Matt was him playing basketball and watching basketball with him.

I don't like Matt at all but I would bet if they set him up with someone he clicked with, this would've gone a whole 'nuther way.   

Of course, I liked Amber at all, I probably would have stronger feelings of dislike for Matt!

[qtpye]

3 hours ago, trimthatfat said:

I am so glad Keith opted for divorce. Whether Keith sucks or Iris is too immature, they were not compatible. Period. It doesn’t make either of them bad people. Too many people stay in hopeless relationships because they don’t want to hurt another person or because they don’t want to admit the relationship isn’t working. Could Keith have told Iris that he isn’t attracted to her and doesn’t like her off-camera...sure? But it would have been incredibly rude. He wanted a divorce and that’s that.

Iris can take this time to now find the right man for her. I think it’s ridiculous she chose to do this kind of show in the first place. Her mom implied that Iris’s relationships tend not to end well and I think it because Iris has many emotional issues to figure out. I am a big supporter of therapy and think she would have been better off seeing a therapist, not signing up for this show. She seems like a sweet person with a quirky personality who just needs to work through some emotional issues.

Keith clearly checked out a while ago. I think the condom situation was the beginning of the end. Also, if this show is going to pair a virgin with someone with experience, they need to ask the individuals in the relationship if they are okay with that before pairing them. If asked during the interview process, I’m sure Keith would have said early on that he would prefer a non-virgin or at the very least, someone who is more open-minded. I recall Jamie Otis didn’t want to have sex with Doug Hefner on their season, but she slowly opened herself up to him. They cuddled, they kissed, etc. Iris wasn’t ready for that. When Keith said he liked doggy style during sex, Iris had a very immature reaction. I also think that influenced Keith’s decision and made him realize the situation was going to require way more patience than he has. Greg is a sweetheart and I think even he would have struggled tremendously in this area as well.

This. I remember Ricky Bobby being asked if he minded an amazing older woman and then the experts also asked Matt if he wanted a shortie before they paired them up.

The reason they did not ask is that no one in their right mind would say yes. They were probably desperate to have handsome Keith on the show.

1. Keith, stop dating Iris. You don’t have to be mean but it is high time you told that girl that she is not the one. Your efforts to be gentlemanly are just giving her false hope which is cruel.

2. Iris, this man does not want you and probably never will. It hurts, but he is not the one God wants you to be with. You yelling at him to state the obvious just makes you seem desperate and crazy.

We all wanted this couple to work because they looked so damn good together. Heck, I am a woman of color and Iris and Keith could be my cake toppers.

However, the truth is they did not bring out the best in each other.

[sometimesjennifer]

4 hours ago, moonxyz said:

Also, I don't hate Iris as much as you guys do. She's entitled to follow her religion. She's entitled to not want to have sex. Even married women are not obliged to have sex.

Sex positive culture is all the rage but virgins shouldn't be burned to the stake. Tolerance goes both ways.

And just how horrible and terrible she is as a person?

The mere fact that she was a virgin and was staying true to her values was not what turned me off about her. I've got zero judgement there. It was that her entire personality was wrapped up in it. It gave her an intense air of superiority. It started with her hunt for the most blindingly white wedding dress so she could put on display what a perfect, pristine woman she was. She wanted EVERYONE to know at a glance that she was pure as the driven snow. She wielded that virginity like an amazing, incredible prize that she would grant only to the man who proved himself worthy. She accused Keith of possibly being a nymphomaniac because he had sex before she met him. She was disgusted by the fact that he enjoys doggy style (a pretty basic, Caucasian sexual position). She was very, very judgemental, which had to make him feel uncomfortable with her.

And for those of you who say Keith should have tried harder to seduce her: she refused to even DISCUSS the ways in which she'd like sex initiated with her. That probably scared him off completely. The experts handed her the opportunity to tell him exactly how she'd want to be sexually wooed on a silver platter and she shut the fuck down. She acted as tho they were asking her to describe the sexual act in first person in excruciating detail. Nope. That little slip of paper just asked how she'd like her partner to initiate. Nothing scandalous there. She could gave taken that moment to say something like, "Well, obviously I don't know for sure yet, but I really enjoy being kissed on the neck with a hand gently caressing my belly..." Instead she got that annoyed look on her face and mumbled, "Do other stuff first?? Ugh, I don't know!!!"

Just because you're not sexually active, that doesn't mean you're not a sexual person (unless you're asexual, which she very well could be, and that's a whole other issue). Most virgins on the cusp of becoming active think about sex A LOT. What they want to try, what they imagine it will be like, what stuff turns them on. She acted like she wasn't even allowed to entertain sexual thoughts until the almighty SEXUAL INTERCOURSE took place. Penetration does not equal sex. There's a whole lot of other stuff built in and she was not interested in exploration, through words or actions.

And that's why I don't like Iris. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[Crazy Bird Lady]

7 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

You quoted me as asking the question "Why do they call it 'Forever Decision'...?" But I RESPONDED to that query posted by Ontime.

Sorry. 😲

I was trying to use "select-text quote"... and you're right, it came up as quoting you. I didn't notice, my apologies. 

I usually just hunt down the original source, and quote directly from it. 

[sasha206]

42 minutes ago, sometimesjennifer said:

The mere fact that she was a virgin and was staying true to her values was not what turned me off about her. I've got zero judgement there. It was that her entire personality was wrapped up in it. It gave her an intense air of superiority. It started with her hunt for the most blindingly white wedding dress so she could put on display what a perfect, pristine woman she was. She wanted EVERYONE to know at a glance that she was pure as the driven snow. She wielded that virginity like an amazing, incredible prize that she would grant only to the man who proved himself worthy. She accused Keith of possibly being a nymphomaniac because he had sex before she met him. She was disgusted by the fact that he enjoys doggy style (a pretty basic, Caucasian sexual position). She was very, very judgemental, which had to make him feel uncomfortable with her.

And for those of you who say Keith should have tried harder to seduce her: she refused to even DISCUSS the ways in which she'd like sex initiated with her. That probably scared him off completely. The experts handed her the opportunity to tell him exactly how she'd want to be sexually wooed on a silver platter and she shut the fuck down. She acted as tho they were asking her to describe the sexual act in first person in excruciating detail. Nope. That little slip of paper just asked how she'd like her partner to initiate. Nothing scandalous there. She could gave taken that moment to say something like, "Well, obviously I don't know for sure yet, but I really enjoy being kissed on the neck with a hand gently caressing my belly..." Instead she got that annoyed look on her face and mumbled, "Do other stuff first?? Ugh, I don't know!!!"

Just because you're not sexually active, that doesn't mean you're not a sexual person (unless you're asexual, which she very well could be, and that's a whole other issue). Most virgins on the cusp of becoming active think about sex A LOT. What they want to try, what they imagine it will be like, what stuff turns them on. She acted like she wasn't even allowed to entertain sexual thoughts until the almighty SEXUAL INTERCOURSE took place. Penetration does not equal sex. There's a whole lot of other stuff built in and she was not interested in exploration, through words or actions.

And that's why I don't like Iris. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

I agree so much with this.  However, I do believe that the producers had her play up the virgin talk constantly.  I suspect the whitest of white dresses = producer manipulation just like Keith's mom asking her about the white dress = producer manipulation.  I've been to many many weddings where the bride wore the whitest of white dresses.  None of them were pure as the driven snow!  So the white wedding dress has not been a symbol of virginity since the dark ages.

I also side eye anyone who is a virgin but signs up for a reality show and would even consider the possibility of giving up their v-card for a stranger.  She didn't, obviously, but it was on the table and that's rather odd to me.  Equally odd to me are the women who give it up on their wedding day to a stranger for a TV show (I expect the men to never say no so I'm not slut shaming).

And I'm I the only one who thinks that in about 5 years, Iris will come out of the closet?

[Koalagirl]

2 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

I think YES.  There’s too many things.  The show, couples couch, after the show,Unfiltered, etc.  I still can’t find Big Red’s new brown hair.  Where is it?  Under what title ?  Is it attached after one of the episodes?

Her brown hair was shown in the preview for next week’s episode.

[moonxyz]

1 hour ago, sometimesjennifer said:

The mere fact that she was a virgin and was staying true to her values was not what turned me off about her. I've got zero judgement there. It was that her entire personality was wrapped up in it. It gave her an intense air of superiority. It started with her hunt for the most blindingly white wedding dress so she could put on display what a perfect, pristine woman she was. She wanted EVERYONE to know at a glance that she was pure as the driven snow. She wielded that virginity like an amazing, incredible prize that she would grant only to the man who proved himself worthy. She accused Keith of possibly being a nymphomaniac because he had sex before she met him. She was disgusted by the fact that he enjoys doggy style (a pretty basic, Caucasian sexual position). She was very, very judgemental, which had to make him feel uncomfortable with her.

And for those of you who say Keith should have tried harder to seduce her: she refused to even DISCUSS the ways in which she'd like sex initiated with her. That probably scared him off completely. The experts handed her the opportunity to tell him exactly how she'd want to be sexually wooed on a silver platter and she shut the fuck down. She acted as tho they were asking her to describe the sexual act in first person in excruciating detail. Nope. That little slip of paper just asked how she'd like her partner to initiate. Nothing scandalous there. She could gave taken that moment to say something like, "Well, obviously I don't know for sure yet, but I really enjoy being kissed on the neck with a hand gently caressing my belly..." Instead she got that annoyed look on her face and mumbled, "Do other stuff first?? Ugh, I don't know!!!"

Just because you're not sexually active, that doesn't mean you're not a sexual person (unless you're asexual, which she very well could be, and that's a whole other issue). Most virgins on the cusp of becoming active think about sex A LOT. What they want to try, what they imagine it will be like, what stuff turns them on. She acted like she wasn't even allowed to entertain sexual thoughts until the almighty SEXUAL INTERCOURSE took place. Penetration does not equal sex. There's a whole lot of other stuff built in and she was not interested in exploration, through words or actions.

And that's why I don't like Iris. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

Producers did that. They show what they want to and put people into boxes to fit a certain narratives and create drama.

In the real world, Iris says only a few  were privy to that information. Then she goes on a show where sex is brought up constantly. What is she supposed to do?

She works with kids, probably uncomfortable talking about certain things and self conscious also. She needs hand holding with the right person (not Keith who values sex. A lot). Doesn't mean she's damaged goods.

Iris ain't standing at the corner handing out flyers about purity. She simply doesn't have sexual experience and sees sex as sacred. Others don't. Big deal.

Edited September 14, 2019 by moonxyz

[sasha206]

6 minutes ago, moonxyz said:

Producers did that. They show what they want to and put people into boxes to fit a certain narratives and create drama.

In the real world, Iris says only a few  were privy to that information. Then she goes on a show where sex is brought up constantly. What is she supposed to do?

She works with kids, probably uncomfortable talking about certain things and self conscious also. She needs hand holding with the right person (not Keith who values sex. A lot). Doesn't mean she's damaged goods.

Iris ain't standing at the corner handing out flyers about purity. She simply doesn't have sexual experience and sees sex as sacred. Others don't. Big deal.

I agree that the V-card was played up by production. I also doubt that Keith was as concerned about it either.   I just think he wasn't that into her.  

[sometimesjennifer]

6 minutes ago, moonxyz said:

In the real world, Iris says only a few  were privy to that information. Then she goes on a show where sex is brought up constantly. What is she supposed to do?

Not go on a show where sex is brought up constantly, maybe? No one forced her to participate.

[Crazy Bird Lady]

6 minutes ago, moonxyz said:

Producers did that [making Iris all about her virginity]. They show what they want to and put people into boxes to fit a certain narratives and create drama.

Iris ain't standing at the corner handing out flyers about purity. She simply doesn't have sexual experience and sees sex as sacred. Others don't. Big deal.

Agree 100% about the producer-driven story-lines for these 'spouses'.

But Iris did choose to be part of a TV show all about showing the drama involved when you marry a total stranger chosen for you by other strangers. Did Iris just want to become famous, or was she actually oblivious to what any of that could mean?!

...Either way, a virgin choosing to be on a show like MAFS just doesn't pass my "smell test".

[sasha206]

15 minutes ago, Crazy Bird Lady said:

Agree 100% about the producer-driven story-lines for these 'spouses'.

But Iris did choose to be part of a TV show all about showing the drama involved when you marry a total stranger chosen for you by other strangers. Did Iris just want to become famous, or was she actually oblivious to what any of that could mean?!

...Either way, a virgin choosing to be on a show like MAFS just doesn't pass my "smell test".

This is where I am.  I have to side-eye someone whose virginity is something she values but would actually consider giving up to a stranger from a reality show.  

I don't know why but it also wouldn't surprise me if she eventually realizes she's a lesbian.

[princelina]

On 9/12/2019 at 3:29 PM, Lily247 said:

Looking at the final couples' get togethet, I was embarrassed at how the ladies attacked Matt like a bunch of vultures. Regardless of how bad of a husband he was. I thought him saying nothing or his noncommital responses followed by leaving with his beer was a classier approach than duking it out with them. 

I was happy that Amber told the "experts" about him and she seemed like she had grown a little when she opted for divorce, but she was ready to blow it out at the cookout - continuing to harangue him just was going to make her pathetic again.  When she said "I don't deserve this" and he told her he hopes she finds what she is looking for - what did she want him to say?  (That question is rhetorical - I know what she wanted him to say 😄). So I thought Elizabeth helped her out by asking the question that they all should have been asking - you signed up for this "experiment" and couldn't stop dating for the 8 weeks it took?  WTF?

On 9/12/2019 at 6:46 PM, Neurochick said:

I think Deonna is more into Greg than she lets on.  She knows he's into her, but maybe she has seen (as I have) what happens when you let a man know how you feel a little too early, i.e Matt and Amber.  Also there's the issue of the camera and these folks being produced.  When Greg and Deonna were making their decision, Greg looked like he was about to start laughing and when I looked at Deonna, she too looked like something was funny.  Probably the producers told them to drag it out for the show and they felt silly doing it.  I think Deonna will stay with Greg because deep down she knows she might never find a better man than Greg.  She may not be as into him as he's into her but I think she's grown enough to realize, "damn, I'm lucky to have this man."

Here's how it goes:  first person says his/her decision, second person is not allowed to react with a facial expression, just sit there and stare and say "um. . . um" in case we want to break for commercial.  You'd think they could mix it up a little - I felt it was pretty obvious that those 2 were staying together, so why not let the audience enjoy watching Deonna's face light up as she agreed with him?  They had 3 other couples who were all train wrecks in some fashion for building up suspense. But Greg was having a hard time not smiling while she said "um . . .um" so I was pretty sure they had an agreement beforehand  😀

58 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

I agree so much with this.  However, I do believe that the producers had her play up the virgin talk constantly.  I suspect the whitest of white dresses = producer manipulation just like Keith's mom asking her about the white dress = producer manipulation.  I've been to many many weddings where the bride wore the whitest of white dresses.  None of them were pure as the driven snow!  So the white wedding dress has not been a symbol of virginity since the dark ages.

Every MAFS bride in every season has worn a white dress!  I agree it was total producer manipulation, but I believe Iris was the one who informed her MIL about the significance of her white dress.  MIL then ran and told Keith.  Without Iris' instruction I don't think they thought anything more about the dress than "Doesn't she look pretty?"

Edited September 14, 2019 by princelina

[Hangin Out]

11 hours ago, Kdawg82 said:

I understand he calls one of them Jamie?

I wasn’t watching the show when Jamie married Doug.  I did read that she was very disappointed when she saw him.  Apparently, she still doesn’t care for him.  Wonder why she stood with him.  He doesn’t have a steady job, etc.  she’s very attractive and eventually would have found someone else in due time.  I don’t get it.

[princelina]

3 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:

I wasn’t watching the show when Jamie married Doug.  I did read that she was very disappointed when she saw him.  Apparently, she still doesn’t care for him.  Wonder why she stood with him.  He doesn’t have a steady job, etc.  she’s very attractive and eventually would have found someone else in due time.  I don’t get it.

Well the reason the "experts" gave was that Jamie had a hard upbringing/bad family and really wanted a close, nice family, which is what Doug had.  And he spent their whole "experiment" really wooing her.  (At the time I was annoyed that we were supposed to take this show seriously when one of the participants was a Bachelor/Bachelor in Paradise reject.). That season they had one couple who were obviously divorcing, one who were obviously staying together, and Jamie and Doug were the Mystery Couple - did he win her over or not?  I remember being happy that she chose him 😁

One last thing - now that they have to move out of the MAFS housing - will Jamie and Elizabeth keep 2 apartments so that he and his cat have somewhere to go every time he walks out?  🤣

[moonxyz]

Iris signed up to get matched with someone that's ok with marrying a virgin. Not for sex therapy.

I recall her telling Dr Pepper that this was important to her.

Instead she got matched with Keith and purposely put into situations that highlighted her inadequacies. Like the stupid dice game that no one else was made to do. That I wouldn't do either.

I bet you if experts knew their shit and Iris was paired with someone willing to build emotional intimacy, slowly, things what have been different.

And Keith isn't the most emotionally available guy. He's no Greg.

At least Iris was great support in his time of grief but I don't know what Keith brought to the table except not pushing her for sex.

[LennieBriscoe]

sometimesjennifer: "She was disgusted by the fact that he enjoys doggy style (a pretty basic, Caucasian sexual position)."

Leaving the "Caucasian" aside (Ahem! Yes, I know the source!), maybe, just maybe, model-like Iris didn't have enough junk in her trunk for Keith!

[For Cereals]

14 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Betcha only 2 out of 10 readers of this forum know who George Carlin was.....

Armpits, ahole, crotch and teeth.  Use the same rag for all...

[pdlinda]

23 hours ago, OnTime said:

Greg is the most educated person to be on this show.   He has earned that nice big house!!

https://www.linkedin.com/in/gregoryokotie

Oh, WOWWWW!!  Thanks so much for sharing that info.  I kind of got the impression he owned a student "tutoring" type operation but understand he's training high-level engineer/systems/operations personnel in very sophisticated areas.  He also worked for Cisco Engineering which as very selective employer.

It's fascinating that this highly accomplished gentleman chose to put himself in an emotionally (not professionally) vulnerable situation going on national TV to find a bride.  I would think that through professional contacts/connections Greg would have been "off-the-market" marriage-wise many years ago.  He really seems like a great guy!!!

[OnTime]

1 hour ago, princelina said:

Here's how it goes:  first person says his/her decision, second person is not allowed to react with a facial expression, just sit there and stare and say "um. . . um" in case we want to break for commercial.

I think they should each have a card with their decision, "Stay Married" or " Get Divorced".

This card will be face down on the table and the "experts" will see it for this first time on camera. No deciding after the other person goes first.

I know it makes it more of a "game show" but at the end of the day, isn't it?

[sasha206]

21 minutes ago, OnTime said:

I think they should each have a card with their decision, "Stay Married" or " Get Divorced".

This card will be face down on the table and the "experts" will see it for this first time on camera. No deciding after the other person goes first.

I know it makes it more of a "game show" but at the end of the day, isn't it?

This is such a great idea!  

[Purplelady25]

I thought Iris had a very understated, tame reaction to Keith’s announcing he wanted a “Divorce”.  Gasp!!! I was really surprised with his decision. Why did he go on and on saying such nice things about Iris during the decision day? Why did he say “he was 100% attracted to her” if he was going to Divorce her? Wasn’t that sort of contradictory???                                                                                             How come she didn’t seem Shocked, Upset, Devastated??? All she did was cry a little, big deal.  I think she Knew his decision beforehand........

[Lindz]

11 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

And if he WERE in love, THAT would be equally difficult to "cite events, support" for. 

It's NOT though, it's easy to explain why you feel the way you feel & what caused you to feel that way. 😂😂

[Crazy Bird Lady]

37 minutes ago, OnTime said:

I think they should each have a card with their decision, "Stay Married" or " Get Divorced".

This card will be face down on the table and the "experts" will see it for this first time on camera. No deciding after the other person goes first.

I know it makes it more of a "game show" but at the end of the day, isn't it?

YES!! 

MAFS workers, if any of you scanning social media sees this, do it!!

[Lindz]

9 hours ago, trimthatfat said:

Could Keith have told Iris that he isn’t attracted to her and doesn’t like her off-camera...sure? But it would have been incredibly rude.

It would've been incredibly HELPFUL, APPRECIATED, HONEST. Rude? Nah. Information a person NEEDS TO KNOW is NOT rude. What's rude is faking the funk til Decision Day! 😂 COME. ON!

Edited September 14, 2019 by Lindz

[Hangin Out]

3 hours ago, Koalagirl said:

Her brown hair was shown in the preview for next week’s episode.

Oh good.  Thanks.

[Lindz]

Maybe Jamie broke Elizabeth down more & got more control. She's dressing from a whole nother culture! Coverered up to her neck!! Guess she wouldn't wear the burka...yet. 😂 The exit sign is above her head!! Wow.. A literal sign!! 😂

Edited September 14, 2019 by Lindz

[Lindz]

On 9/13/2019 at 9:20 AM, Shatex said:

According to the reunion previews - the may have gotten back together...she should be so lucky

Editing trick. There's NO EFFIN WAY. Lucky NOT knowing what's going on, thinking everything's fine when it's not. Nah.

[MajorNelson]

3 hours ago, sasha206 said:

I don't know why but it also wouldn't surprise me if she eventually realizes she's a lesbian.

Funny question I guess: but do lesbians who commit 100% to feminine partners ever lose their "virginity"?  I'd never thought of that.

Maybe, kinda of a super tehcnicality, but being a 100% lesbian maybe Iris could therefore keep her vaunted virginity.  On the other hand, maybe her religion wouldn't quite favor going this  direction either.  😮

[cinsays]

1 hour ago, Purplelady25 said:

I thought Iris had a very understated, tame reaction to Keith’s announcing he wanted a “Divorce”.  Gasp!!! I was really surprised with his decision. Why did he go on and on saying such nice things about Iris during the decision day? Why did he say “he was 100% attracted to her” if he was going to Divorce her? Wasn’t that sort of contradictory???                                                                                             How come she 

I think most people who want to be kind would want to spare their mate's feelings by telling them what they like about them and then just saying that person was not right for them.  This is what I feel Keith was doing.  

[trimthatfat]

1 hour ago, Lindz said:

It would've been incredibly HELPFUL, APPRECIATED, HONEST. Rude? Nah. Information a person NEEDS TO KNOW is NOT rude. What's rude is faking the funk til Decision Day is rude! 😂 COME. ON!

It's clear you feel very, very strongly about this so I'll just agree to to disagree. I am glad that Iris can now find the right man for her.

[trimthatfat]

4 hours ago, sasha206 said:

I also side eye anyone who is a virgin but signs up for a reality show and would even consider the possibility of giving up their v-card for a stranger.  She didn't, obviously, but it was on the table and that's rather odd to me.  Equally odd to me are the women who give it up on their wedding day to a stranger for a TV show (I expect the men to never say no so I'm not slut shaming).

It is very odd. Someone who has waited this long to have sex and who is specifically waiting to have sex with her husband would likely want to make sure she knows her partner well before having sex. I'd love to know what her expectations were for her partner when she was cast. Did she think 8 weeks was enough to know if her partner was right for her in that regard? What if it wasn't? Did she expect that her partner would feel strongly enough for her that sex didn't have to be in the picture? I'm curious.

[Liberty]

13 minutes ago, trimthatfat said:

I'd love to know what her expectations were for her partner when she was cast. Did she think 8 weeks was enough to know if her partner was right for her in that regard?

The answer may be revealed in the reunion show.

[Retired at last]

I think that if the only issue Keith had with Iris was her virginity, he would have been fine waiting until after Decision Day. He made that very clear that he was not going to be "that guy" until he was very sure they would stay together, so no matter how much she thinks she gave him the green light, he wasn't going to take it.

However, since there were other factors with Iris, such as her bizarre rules for sinks and lemonade, he determined that she did not have the emotional and experiential maturity that he needed his partner to have, so it was an easy decision. I DO believe he found her attractive and they did seem to have fun together, but she was not ready for a serious relationship with him. As her mother pointed out, she has not been successful in relationships, so Keith made the right decision for him. As I mentioned earlier, I think he is a good man for not taking advantage of the situation.

[lids]

I just want Keith’s mom and Iris’ mom to show up at the reunion. Something tells me they would have a much better explanation for what really went down than their kids do.

Did anyone else notice that Keith was saying he still didn’t know what his decision was going to be AS he was entering the car to go to the decision room. I call shenanigans on that. When it came time for him to make his decision, he took a deep breath and gave a very prepared speech. He knew his decision. He was just keeping it to himself because he didn’t want tptb to throw some curveball and make him go first or something. I must give him kudos on that.

Because of the actions of Luke and now Matt, I would like to suggest that Married at First Sight institute a lie detector test. We don’t need eight weeks of out and out fakery. And at least if we have to know the cast member is out there living a double life, can producers install a hidden camera in their rings or something?