S01.E01: Approachable Dreams

[2727]

Debra Newell has a seemingly perfect life: she’s successful, beautiful and lives in one of California’s most desirable coastal cities, Newport Beach. The only thing missing is love. So when Debra finally meets charming and handsome doctor John Meehan, she’s quickly swept into a whirlwind romance, much to her daughters’ dismay.

[Duke2801]

Oh hell yea, I’m all in for this. Loved it. Eric/John is super creepy. Her daughter (the Juno Temple one) is grating, but I like that she saw John’s smarm right away. 

I’m excited/scared (in a Jessie Spano way) for what happens next (I didn’t listen to the podcast and purposely didn’t google the real life story).

Edited November 26, 2018 by Duke2801

[Sun-Bun]

Really enjoyed this far more than I thought I would too—-I’ve been a sucker for Connie Britton after her time on “Nashville” and she’s playing this role just as naturally. She’s plays her character as so sweetly naive, yet desperate enough for the romantic dream in her head to overcome her good sense.

HATE the older daughter...I think the actress playing her needs to dial it down a notch or 12 and not come off as such a hateful snob from the start. Obviously the show wants the character/actress to overdo her initial disdain so that John’s character seems a bit more likable and sympathetic in the beginning, but I still don’t think this actress has enough charisma to pull off her doubtful nature without coming off like a spoiled bitch. Time will tell, I suppose.

Loved all the great scenery and home decor porn...Connie’s wardrobe is perfectly Cali-girl chic.

Really digging this creepy turn from Eric Bana so far! I’m shocked over how skinny he’s gotten in recent years, but I think he’s still pretty damned handsome otherwise. Not hard to believe that an older broad would fall for his slick charms.

I already know the true story so none of this is a surprise so far, but I can’t wait to see how it all unravels eventually.

[biakbiak]

Connie was so fabulous in the entire episode but particularly the dating scenes and the bedroom scene when she kicks him out. 

[njbchlover]

I'm in, too!  I didn't listen to the podcast, and didn't know the story, so I'm excited to see where this goes.  At first, I thought the music and filming reminded me of a Lifetime suspense movie, but the more I watched, the more I got into it.  Love, love, love Connie Britton (loved her since her Tammy Tyler role on "Friday Night Lights").  Eric Bana is playing the heck out of the John Meehan role - I got all kinds of chills when he was in the hospital room with that patient. 

Agree that the actress playing Veronica is really coming off as a spoiled, entitled brat - interested to see if she can change that.   

Looking forward to next week.

[Mint Julep]

The comparison to Vicki and Brooks of RHOC is pretty spot on.  Vicki even sees herself as Debra, the naive, successful business woman with several failed marriages and so desperate for love she ignores all red flags. Now waiting to see if John fakes cancer.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Loved that the opening scene featured a shot of Tami Taylor's glorious hair.

The montage of Debra's first dates was a good reminder of how shitty it is out there, as was the brief discussion with Veronica about meeting a new date in public, getting into a car with a stranger, etc. Debra is braver than I am though. I wouldn't want a new guy to know where I work and live before going on my first official date with him. Girl, don't make it easier for people to stalk you!

John walking out without a word after she asked him to GET OUT OF HER BEDROOM reminded me of Mickey Rourke in 9 1/2 Weeks. And just like Mickey Rourke in 9 1/2 Weeks, John is a master manipulator. He knows just what to say and do to get Debra to do what he wants. You know, like getting her to rent his dream place after only five weeks of dating.

I think it's wonderful that Debra still believes in love after four failed marriages. I just think she needs to slow her fucking roll. You already live together so what is the rush to get married to someone so quickly? Maybe wait until one of those dating milestones like, I don't know, your four month anniversary before getting married?

[teddysmom]

I've listened to the podcast (no spoilers) and the daughter is being depicted exactly as she behaved the first time she saw John.  The LA Times story goes into even more detail. 

Also, Dateline did an episode on this just a few weeks ago, and we get to see interviews with Debra and her family, and others.

She was delusional from the get go. 

Who wants to start a pool on how long it is before she's on Real Housewives of Orange County?  You know this is Cohen's little scheme. 

[2727]

This is my first exposure to the story and I don't want to look it up because of spoilers, but are we to assume that Debra's Maserati level wealth is from her own business? Or family money? Divorces?

[Empress1]

2 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

The montage of Debra's first dates was a good reminder of how shitty it is out there, as was the brief discussion with Veronica about meeting a new date in public, getting into a car with a stranger, etc. Debra is braver than I am though. I wouldn't want a new guy to know where I work and live before going on my first official date with him. Girl, don't make it easier for people to stalk you!

Braver, or dumber? Although I was having a conversation with someone about how "back in the day" (like, probably when Debra started dating - Debra met John when she was 59) a man WOULD come to your house to pick you up and it was seen as chivalrous. But I'm like, absolutely not, I don't know you like that, we will meet at the spot.

You really do have to sift through a lot of junk when online dating. I've met some great men online and I do have friends who have met their spouses, but I've also met some duds. I'd have been through at cargo shorts and a polo shirt and I'd really be through at sneakers on my bed (cool, you want to storm out on me? Stay gone. Defend myself, for what? Setting boundaries? Boy bye).

I read the LA Times story so I know how this ends. But even without knowing how it ends, I'm over here like "You did WHAT after five weeks?" I mean, listen. I get that loneliness is a bitch (when she said she'd been married four times and felt like she'd used up all her chances, I was sad for her), but have some sense!

Veronica is horrible. 

Quote

This is my first exposure to the story and I don't want to look it up because of spoilers, but are we to assume that Debra's Maserati level wealth is from her own business? Or family money? Divorces?

I believe it's from her business. The LA Times story talks about how she built a thriving design business over 30 years.

Edited November 26, 2018 by Empress1

[Ohwell]

35 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

I'd have been through at cargo shorts and a polo shirt and I'd really be through at sneakers on my bed (cool, you want to storm out on me? Stay gone. Defend myself, for what? Setting boundaries? Boy bye).

Yeah, I'd have been done with him when he showed up dressed like he was going to play basketball.

I'm settled in and booed up, and hope to stay that way, but if I were ever out in the dating scene again, I would never do online dating.  I'm old school and it's just not my thing at all.    

[teddysmom]

17 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

dressed like he was going to play basketball.

I thought "he looks like he's going to mow the lawn". 

[Ohwell]

Just wanted to add that I have no sympathy at all for Debra.  She's too old to be that dumb.

[itsadryheat]

Very accurate first episode. Connie has Debra's "airy" speech down to a tee. I suggested the podcast to a younger work associate, and she couldn't get past Debra's voice. 

Great casting. Chilling story. Listened to podcast, read LA Times article, watched Dateline episode and it still gave me the creeps.

First date drama queen departure. Smack talking to kids.  Arriving late in scrubs at a formal event.  Oh Debra.

[Ohwell]

And both of the daughters had vocal fry which drove me nuts.

[teddysmom]

22 minutes ago, itsadryheat said:

Very accurate first episode. Connie has Debra's "airy" speech down to a tee. I suggested the podcast to a younger work associate, and she couldn't get past Debra's voice. 

Great casting. Chilling story. Listened to podcast, read LA Times article, watched Dateline episode and it still gave me the creeps.

First date drama queen departure. Smack talking to kids.  Arriving late in scrubs at a formal event.  Oh Debra.

ITA on all points.  

 

19 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

And both of the daughters had vocal fry which drove me nuts.

IIRC from the podcasts, the girls do speak like that.  

24 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

ust wanted to add that I have no sympathy at all for Debra.  She's too old to be that dumb.

Amen!! 

[Empress1]

25 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Just wanted to add that I have no sympathy at all for Debra.  She's too old to be that dumb.

And does she have to marry everyone she dates?

[biakbiak]

30 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Just wanted to add that I have no sympathy at all for Debra.  She's too old to be that dumb.

While I agree to a certain extent, I had no sympathy for the real life Debra, thanks to Connie’s performance particularly in the bedroom scene where she kicks him out I thought she conveyed how a woman who lacked self esteem in romantic relationships would be vulnerable to this sort of con man asshole. 

 

27 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

And both of the daughters had vocal fry which drove me nuts.

Unfortunately it’s extremely accurate to their actual speeking voices! 

Edited November 26, 2018 by biakbiak

[Empress1]

2 minutes ago, biakbiak said:

While I agree to a certain extent, I had no sympathy for the real life Debra, thanks to Connie’s performance particularly in the bedroom scene where she kicks him out I thought she conveyed how a woman who lacked self esteem in romantic relationships would be vulnerable to this sort of con man asshole. 

 

Unfortunately it’s extremely accurate to their actual speeking voices! 

I believe it - two young SoCal women would definitely speak like that. 

When Debra said Veronica's behavior is embarrassing, I thought "Yeah, you SHOULD be embarrassed. You raised children who, as young adults, break things when they don't get their way - things that you paid for, by the way." I wish the fuck I would. 

Spoiler

Knowing that Terra is the hero of this story and that John is a con man doesn't make her or Veronica any less bratty.

[teddysmom]

3 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

Spoiler

Knowing that Terra is the hero of this story and that John is a con man doesn't make her or Veronica any less bratty.

 

Spoiler

Agree.  I thought it was rather strange that she was obsessed with the Walking Dead and always being up on surviving an apocalypse. But I guess in the end it paid off. 

[Barb23]

I really enjoyed the first episode.  I came across it on  Dateline so I, too, know the ending.

I agree with the other posters about John's choice of dress.  Showing up at the gala in scrubs that I guess he had worn all day - yuck.  My niece is an RN & can't wait to change out of her work scrubs & shoes as soon as she walks in the door.  The only time I saw my surgeon in scrubs was the day he operated on me.  Even when he came out to tell my husband & son how I did, he had already changed into street clothes.  I'm sure this is what most, if not all doctors do - leave dirty, bloody, germy scrubs at the hospital.  I know John was wearing  scrubs to impress, but you think Debra would have picked up on the constant wearing of them right away, especially at the gala.

[teddysmom]

32 minutes ago, Barb23 said:

but you think Debra would have picked up on the constant wearing of them right away, especially at the gala.

If you ever get a chance to see the Dateline episode, which I would imagine they'd rerun to promote this series, you'd understand how Debra may be able to pick out fabric swatches, but she is not the brightest bulb in the drawer. 

[Neurochick]

For some reason vocal fry never bothered me.  It's just the way someone speaks; it's like why accents and speech patterns don't bother me, speak and let speak I guess.

But John...

Spoiler

he wasn't even that good a gigolo, if he had been, he would have had it made in the shade. But his real issue was that he was a dope fiend.

Edited November 26, 2018 by Neurochick

[teddysmom]

33 minutes ago, Neurochick said:

 

Spoiler

he wasn't even that good a gigolo, if he had been, he would have had it made in the shade. But his real issue was that he was a dope fiend.

 

Spoiler

And all the other women he scammed!  I think he worked here in Indiana somewhere and maybe dated/married a woman. I seem to recall Fort Wayne being mentioned in Dateline show.  Wasn't he from Ohio? 

[Ohwell]

Debra would have been better off just having a gigolo, who at least dresses the part and knows how to act around people.  Just give him an allowance and let him go when/if she got tired of him.  At least she would have known what she was getting into. 

[Pickles]

Did he wear the dirty scrubs to be more convincing? Why did he show up in those hideous shorts and tennis shoes for the first date? Was that intentional or he just didn't have any nicer clothes? I also watched this on Dateline. It was fascinating in a horrific way. Cannot even imagine being married four times! It is hard enough finding one person that you love. Four failed marriages and then she is back out there searching again. Omg. She needs intensive therapy on how to enjoy her own company and be happy alone! 

[Empress1]

4 hours ago, itsadryheat said:

I can't get past she was married 4 times, actively dating  and learned nothing about red flags.

She's so lucky the ending of this story ended the way it did. 

And has young adult children who are ostensibly dating in the age of apps and social media. None of them taught her to Google a dude? 

[AmandaPanda]

I would have been done when he showed up in scrubs to the gala. Did he take time to change into clean scrubs at least? And if you're already going to be late to the gala, take the time to put on at least nice pants and a dress shirt. It's fine if you don't have enough time to stop and pick up your "tux." 

I binged the podcast, so I know how it ends. Doesn't make Veronica any less irritating. Anyone who cares that much about purses is a hard no from me. 

[itsadryheat]

5 minutes ago, AmandaPanda said:

And if you're already going to be late to the gala

and ya can't text or call. Loser.

"but he's cute and so much fun"!!!!!!

[Barb23]

I guess this  shows some people lose all their sense of reality when falling for a person quickly & marrying on a whim.

My mother has a good widowed 80 something friend who shocked her family & friends by getting married to a man who lived in her retirement community after not knowing him for long.  He was in bad health & think he died not long after they married.  Her friend could never give a good answer to why she remarried at her age. The only thing she could come up with it was cheaper for them to live in one apartment than two. I guessed they believed in marriage  vs living together even at their age. It was a shame,  she moved into his apartment which wasn't nearly as nice as hers.

[sadie]

I think Connie really pegged a weak easily pliable woman who also happened to be competent in her work. It’s an interesting duality. The fact that she let him back in after their first date was unbelievable, red flags were a flying. The daughters, while irritating as hell, were spot on in their mistrust of him. And if that “therapist” is in any way an accurate depiction she should have lost her license and just shows how she coddled this woman to her own detriment. It is totally relevant that she was married FOUR FRIGGIN TIMES and to not have that be part of her therapy in terms of “hey lady you got a real bad picker, maybe listen to the people who love you and what they’re seeing”, just criminal IMO. 

[mythoughtis]

I didn’t listen to  the podcast. I did watch the Dateline or 48 hours, whichever had it some months back.  First, her daughters seemed older and saner on the network true crime episode than this portrayal. 

I dont remember the real Debra. But anyone who’s been married 4 times and doesn’t do some investigation before moving in/ marrying number 5 is a really desperate woman.  The  psychologist in this episode needs some re-training - she okayed Debra's actions and ignored  the daughters concerns. This happened after 2014, googling the guy would have brought a lot to light.    I know background checking a romantic interest seems cold/ but she knew nothing about this guy when she married him. My mom and step-dad got married after 3 months, and that was rough for years. They lived in the same small rural area and had friends in common, but still it was rough. 

 

Oh, they changed the older daughters name for this tv series, and the real daughter wasn’t involved with the series. Kind of says something about the portrayal to me. 

Edited November 27, 2018 by mythoughtis

[Valny]

Quote

And both of the daughters had vocal fry which drove me nuts.

Quote

Unfortunately it’s extremely accurate to their actual speeking voices! 

That's what I figured or else why would they even choose to speak like that! Just talk in your normal voice. I appreciate trying to be accurate, despite the not so pleasant sound of the voices.   Now I can't wait to watch that Dateline episode to listen to the real daughters. Aren't they on the podcast too?  I just started listening to the first ep, but will listen only after I see each ep on Bravo.

I like it so far,even though in that one scene, Britton's character was making me go COME ON,don't be so wimpy,side with your kid! not this guy you know for such a short time. I know it's based on a true story and all, but I guess I don't like seeing Britton like that. Of course the audience know that Bana is going to be a rat ahead of time,so that colors my opinions already on why she should be smarter.

It's a good cast. I was trying to get an idea on the younger daughter, is she going to a school for pet grooming and about how old is she around? I also like her in Ozark (Julie Garner,she's very good in that) and it's such an 180 from her foul mouthed character there. I remember her also as the granddaughter in that Lily Tomlin film, Grandma. I also like Juno Temple,she always plays interesting, wide range characters. She does a great American accent too, I know she's British so I'm not fooled this time you Brit actors you!

[Empress1]

2 minutes ago, Valny said:

I also like her in Ozark (Julie Garner,she's very good in that) and it's such an 180 from her foul mouthed character there. I remember her also as the granddaughter in that Lily Tomlin film, Grandma.

Holy shit, that IS her! I didn't recognize her with straight hair! She has such a glorious signature curly mane. (I tried with one season of Ozark but it didn't quite take. Grandma is great though.)

[Chaos Theory]

Between this and Escape from Dannemora I am watching some pretty good true crime drama reinactments.  Unfortunately they are both on the same night at the same time which royally sucks for me.   

I think I will enjoy this a lot because although the daughters seem to be very bitch in retrospect they are not wrong and the dude from the start is sketchy as all hell.   Mom just doesn’t see it and just allows herself to get swept away in a whirlwind love affair.  What is this her sixth? Marriage so she is obviously an easy mark for this kind of conman.  

[Empress1]

41 minutes ago, itsadryheat said:

Who doesn't. But she did nothing to check this out. Only believed his words and the fairytale in her head.  

And he TOLD HER he didn't have money! Child support and tax woes, he said. And she was like "Cool cool cool, let me just write a check for $84K for this waterfront property." GIRL.

1 hour ago, Sterling said:

Yes, he wore the scrubs to be more convincing.  In the first episode, it was revealed that he never was an anesthesiologist, but a nurse anesthetist.  

The fact that they were the same scrubs all the time, and that they were dirty, were because he didn't have any other scrubs.  Spoilers, so I won't say more.

He showed up to the Gala late, and in scrubs, to appear too important to even make it to the gala on time.  Busy doctor, taking care of so much, poor guy.

Shorts and tennis shoes for the first date were because he literally didn't have any other clothes.   Not going to say any more than that, as it could be considered a spoiler.

Spoiler

When it was revealed that he met Debra TWO DAYS after getting out of prison, I like to died.

Edited November 27, 2018 by Empress1

[absolutelyido]

5 hours ago, sadie said:

I think Connie really pegged a weak easily pliable woman who also happened to be competent in her work. It’s an interesting duality. The fact that she let him back in after their first date was unbelievable, red flags were a flying. The daughters, while irritating as hell, were spot on in their mistrust of him. And if that “therapist” is in any way an accurate depiction she should have lost her license and just shows how she coddled this woman to her own detriment. It is totally relevant that she was married FOUR FRIGGIN TIMES and to not have that be part of her therapy in terms of “hey lady you got a real bad picker, maybe listen to the people who love you and what they’re seeing”, just criminal IMO. 

I think part of Debra's therapy should have been to spend one year not even thinking about dating anyone, but instead spending that time figuring out how to be happy just with herself. To get married for the fifth time after knowing the guy only 8.5 weeks seems to me to show that Debra was desperately afraid to be alone. She needed to figure out why that was before even thinking about being in a relationship. 

[ninjago]

It really pisses me off that Debra would bring a man she barely knows into her home while her daughter is living there, let him spend the night without telling her daughter he'd be there, and let him roam around the house, including into her daughter's room.  I don't care how lonely she was, and even if he wasn't a total creep, that's so grossly irresponsible.

[DangerousMinds]

13 hours ago, Ohwell said:

And both of the daughters had vocal fry which drove me nuts.

Me too!

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Whenever people start lying or trying to hide aspects of their relationship, it's because they KNOW it's wrong so when Debra suggested to Veronica that they not live together anymore, I just rolled my eyes. That was the moment when Debra went from sympathetic to pathetic. She was so desperate for love that she was willing to look her daughter in the eye and lie so that she could shack up with her new boyfriend. Even worse, she framed it as something that would help their relationship when she knew that what she was doing (lying and sneaking around) was going to undermine their relationship even further. Then she lied to Terra about John living in the new place when his stuff was sitting there on the bathroom counter right in front of them. Did she really think that her two adult daughters would not figure out that she and John were living together?

12 hours ago, yourmomiseasy said:

I think the actresses playing the daughters are doing a great job.  When listening to the podcast one of my take-aways was that the daughters were annoying assholes.  They almost make you root for John.

I haven't listened to the podcast so I knew nothing about any of these people before watching this episode, but one thing I appreciated was that it showed you can be an annoying entitled asshole (Veronica) but still be right about certain things. TV and movies tend to perpetuate the myth that nice people are the ones who are right about everything which oversimplifies human nature and people in general. Veronica is a spoiled brat, but that doesn't mean she's wrong about John.

9 hours ago, sadie said:

I think Connie really pegged a weak easily pliable woman who also happened to be competent in her work. It’s an interesting duality. The fact that she let him back in after their first date was unbelievable, red flags were a flying. The daughters, while irritating as hell, were spot on in their mistrust of him. And if that “therapist” is in any way an accurate depiction she should have lost her license and just shows how she coddled this woman to her own detriment. It is totally relevant that she was married FOUR FRIGGIN TIMES and to not have that be part of her therapy in terms of “hey lady you got a real bad picker, maybe listen to the people who love you and what they’re seeing”, just criminal IMO. 

I know several people (both male and female) who have very successful careers but make terrible choices in their romantic relationships. It's so frustrating to see people who are clearly smart enough to make good decisions about everything else in life except their relationships, so for me Debra is frustratingly real. One woman I know was 32 and on her third marriage when I met her. They had a very nice house in the suburbs and two dogs. She had a great job and she had several very fulfilling artistic hobbies that paid well. She ended up divorcing her third husband and getting into a long term relationship with an abusive alcoholic. In public he was very lovey dovey with her (to the point where it was sometimes embarrassing to see him acting like a high school boy with his first boner) but he was possessive, jealous, and controlling. He started cutting her off from her friends one by one. They moved in together pretty quickly but before that happened, an old friend of hers was visiting from out of town. This friend knew her ex-husband and it was not yet public knowledge to everyone that she was dating the alcoholic, so she suggested that her new boyfriend not come with them. He agreed but then proceeded to call her all night. Then he drove to her place, broke in, and smashed a bunch of her stuff. AND SHE STILL MOVED IN WITH HIM. I was like girl, you are so smart and funny and talented and you are letting this guy control your life - why?!! After they moved in together, she was supporting both of them (he had an artsy job so his work was sporadic but paid well when he got hired). She was bending and shifting everything in her life to accommodate his every need and it drove me crazy to watch it happen. When they finally broke up four years later, she moved to another state. I was relieved that she'd finally gotten away from him. Less than a year later, they started talking again and she came out to visit him. Then she moved back here and they moved into a new place together. I was like fuuuuuuuck, AGAIN? I thought the madness was finally over! It took two more years before they finally broke up for good.

7 hours ago, Valny said:

I was trying to get an idea on the younger daughter, is she going to a school for pet grooming and about how old is she around? I also like her in Ozark (Julie Garner,she's very good in that) and it's such an 180 from her foul mouthed character there. I remember her also as the granddaughter in that Lily Tomlin film, Grandma.

 

7 hours ago, Empress1 said:

Holy shit, that IS her! I didn't recognize her with straight hair! She has such a glorious signature curly mane. (I tried with one season of Ozark but it didn't quite take. Grandma is great though.)

I know her as Kimmie on The Americans, but she was also on Maniac recently (on Netflix). It's great to see she's working so much!

3 hours ago, ninjago said:

It really pisses me off that Debra would bring a man she barely knows into her home while her daughter is living there, let him spend the night without telling her daughter he'd be there, and let him roam around the house, including into her daughter's room.  I don't care how lonely she was, and even if he wasn't a total creep, that's so grossly irresponsible.

ITA - when we initially saw John in the kitchen in the morning, it wasn't clear how much time had passed (I couldn't tell if it was the next morning or a month later), but it's definitely not cool to have some guy spend the night without telling whoever you live with (whether it's your kids or roommates). That's just common courtesy. But the fact that he walked into Veronica's bedroom and into her closet? That's really fucking inappropriate. When Mr. EB lived in a house with two roommates, I NEVER went into the other two people's rooms even if the door was wide open. As a guest, I felt it was fine for me to be in the common areas (the kitchen, the living room) but I would never go into someone else's room. That's just rude. The fact that Debra was more interested in having her boyfriend spend the night than her daughter's safety/comfort in her own home tells you where her priorities were.

[Chaos Theory]

I can already see both daughters are going to get hate posted on this board.   I honestly thought that they were genuinely worried about their mom but just acted like  kids do when confronted with their parents sex life.  Plus Debra was lying to them and being manipulated.  I am betting they are going to be treated like worse villians on boards like this because they are bitchy then the guy who is a con man.

Edited November 27, 2018 by Chaos Theory

[Neurochick]

I thought her daughters were great.  They realized their mom wasn't thinking with her brain.  Just because someone is "annoying" and has "vocal fry" doesn't make them wrong.

Also, I don't think it's strange that someone can be smart in business and bad in relationships, those are two very different parts of life.  I think what happens in this society is that people are shown on movies and TV shows that a "normal" relationship is boring, and believe they want to have excitement in their lives.  So you can be serious about business and money and that's "boring" and "normal" but you want excitement in your love life.  Hollywood makes dysfunctional relationships look interesting and sane ones look boring.

Spoiler

I saw the movie "A Star Is Born" and that was a HUGE takeaway for me, from that movie.  The relationship was all kinds of fucked up and the movie ends with Gaga's character singing this sad song, "I'll Never Love Again."  I thought it would have been a better movie if you saw her years later, successful and married to someone who loved her and was sane. 

[itsadryheat]

The daughters annoying, bratty behavior, is nothing compared to Debra's horrible judgement and choices.  Loved the podcast, but had a real problem with Debra. Guess I need therapy, because as vile as John was, she irked me the most.  I related to the kids frustration more than Debra's desperation

[Chaos Theory]

I related to both which is why this show is going to really work for me.  I understand the deep bottomless pit of loneliness that will allow you to overlook obvious warning signs buuuuuut I also understand the frustration of those around you who see every single one of those warning signs but still manage to come off as the bad guy getting In the way of true love.

Edited November 27, 2018 by Chaos Theory

[Aethera]

Folks - please remember that not everyone watching may have listened to the podcast. Posters may not know how things end or how things progress with this story. It's totally fine to mention the podcast here, and to compare what's happening on the show to what happened on the podcast, but please try hard not to get AHEAD of events on the show - the show may choose to reveal things in a different order, etc. Thanks!

[Kdawg82]

I was unfamiliar with the story prior to this. I thought the show has been well acted so far and actors are doing great in it. I catch some tongue in cheek with the way the daughters are and even Jean Smart as the mother/grandmother. I agree with the lack of sympathy bringing in this stranger so soon into your children's lives.  Especially two somewhat failed-to-launch daughters who may as well be young teenagers. What we need to realize is that the lifestyle of wealthy folks in that area is not like a middle class family from the midwest or northeast. They kind of remind me of Lynne Curtin and her daughters from the O.C. housewives. Mom is focused on keeping the peace within the family and the kids just sh** on anything they can. But there is definitely love there between parents and children.  

I'm a fan of "the walking dead" so for me I can't come down on Terra for the inspiration to fight for her life. I'd like to think I'd be the same in that situation . 

Thanksully I'm settled in life now but this is why I wouldn't date again. Just all of it. In my younger years, I would've given John a pass on the shorts and tee for the first date but after storming out I wouldn't ever answer his calls again. Even back then in my 20s. And I've had a lot of losers.

[Pickles]

In the few weeks before they married, did she EVER say--show me where you live, let's go to your apartment, etc?  All kinds of red flags there that she obviously did not even know where he was living. And where WAS he living? In a trailer in the desert somewhere? I thought I read that. Did he have a car? So many questions. Lol.

[teddysmom]

3 minutes ago, Pickles said:

In a trailer in the desert somewhere? I

I thought he had a storage space somewhere.  

[bichonblitz]

1 minute ago, Pickles said:

In the few weeks before they married, did she EVER say--show me where you live, let's go to your apartment, etc?  All kinds of red flags there that she obviously did not even know where he was living. And where WAS he living? In a trailer in the desert somewhere? I thought I read that. Did he have a car? So many questions. Lol.

No, he did not have a car. I can't get past this. How are you ready to move in with someone and not know/have seen where they live? Or ask the good Dr.  why he doesn't have a car? He casually mentions he has child support and tax liens and she brushed that off and was ready to pull out her checkbook for the entire year's rent!  The tax liens would have been a huge red flag for me right there! Just because you're lonely doesn't mean you have to be stupid. 

[walnutqueen]

15 hours ago, Chaos Theory said:

Between this and Escape from Dannemora I am watching some pretty good true crime drama reinactments.  Unfortunately they are both on the same night at the same time which royally sucks for me.   

I think I will enjoy this a lot because although the daughters seem to be very bitch in retrospect they are not wrong and the dude from the start is sketchy as all hell.   Mom just doesn’t see it and just allows herself to get swept away in a whirlwind love affair.  What is this her sixth? Marriage so she is obviously an easy mark for this kind of conman.  

I'm watching both shows, too, and am really enjoying them.

 

32 minutes ago, Kdawg82 said:

I'm a fan of "the walking dead" so for me I can't come down on Terra for the inspiration to fight for her life. I'd like to think I'd be the same in that situation . 

Another fan of The Walking Dead here.  Between it and all the true crime shows I watch, let's just say that I've have a lot of "dual purpose" self defense weapons stashed in strategic places.  ;-)