S01.E08: Confessions

[Tara Ariano]

Tori reflects on the most explosive moments from the season and reveals exclusive new footage shot behind closed doors.

[Miss February]

Inexplicably, I know I'll watch this.  I just hope that the "exclusive new footage shot behind closed doors" will not involve a naked Tori or Dean.  (I have no doubt that they both would have seriously considered showing us their first night of make-up-sex-after-Tori-finally-forgives, if only the network could allow it.)

[tabloidlover]

So true, Miss February, so true.  And yet, I will also be watching with wine glass in hand...

[Patssy Stoned]

I will NOT watch this. I've reached the point of "who gives a shit?"  Also,  I'm scared Dean may sing again.

[tabloidlover]

That was the absolute WORST.  She is such a sucky ball of narcissistic neediness that I was exhausted just listening to her.  No wonder Dean drinks.  He's earning that inheritance...

[suomi]

Somewhere in there she said something like when they were starting their relationship a part of why he was the whole package was that he understood/accepted how life would be with someone (her) who had a big career. Oh dear god in delusional heaven I'd love to see someone force her to view the results of a poll with this question: name a female in entertainment with a big career. Bwaa-fuckin'-ha ha ha.

 

So, Dr Wexler is the therapist who told first husband Charlie that he was out of the picture.

 

Loved the "but my kids eat healthy" while she was scarfing the tacos.

 

Tori, honey, you are not a girl. You are 41. You are soooo far from being a girl.

 

Still no clarification re the sex-acts-that-must-not-be-named: "doing things that no 7-years married couples with 4 kids are doing." Then why include that reference to begin with? "Let's just say Donna Martin has graduated" = chickenshit tactic.

 

It seems obvious to me that her peeps cruised blogs/forums and decisions were made re which issues she needed to (pretend to) address.

[LuckyBitch]

I'm not even halfway through this mess because I can only take it in ten minute increments. So far, two things bug me, although I'm sure there will be many more.

 

In the beginning, they showed some previously unaired footage of the screaming, crying breakdown in the bedroom (after scrapbooking with the kids). In that scene, Tori said to Dean that he always used the old Paul Newman quote about not being tempted to cheat, "Why fool around with hamburger when you have filet mignon at home?" (Tori said filet mignon, but Google says steak). She said he always told her that and she always believed him. She always believed that's why he wouldn't cheat on her.

 

Maybe it's me, but I think that's just sad and pathetic. It's essentially saying he wouldn't cheat on her because he finds her more attractive than other women. Personally, I'd be pissed if my  husband ever used that line on me. It puts the marriage on pretty shaky ground if you ask me. I'd prefer something along the lines of knowing he wouldn't cheat because he's an honorable, trustworthy person who loves and respects me and appreciates what we've built together as a couple and a family, and who would never do anything to hurt or betray me. Not, hey I think you're the hottest babe I can find so why look elsewhere?

 

The fact that Tori said that Dean always used that quote and she always believed that's why he wouldn't cheat on her illustrates just how superficial their relationship really is. Then again, "fairytales" are usually superficial.

 

The other part that irked was when she again LIED by claiming that Dean went straight into "treatment" after that session in Dr. Wexler's office where he talked about wanting to jump out the window. She said they didn't even have a chance to have a conversation about the infidelity because he went right into "treatment". Again, her timeline does not add up. I distinctly remember seeing an article around New Year's about how Tori had posted a Happy New year pic of her and Dean and the kids. He clearly was at home on New Year's Eve and she was acting like all was fine. Yet, on the show, Dean was already in rehab by then and didn't go back home for months, sometime after the show began airing this spring.

 

So, how does she explain this:

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2532193/Tori-Spelling-puts-wedding-ring-two-days-removing-amid-reports-husband-Dean-McDermott-cheated-28-year-old.html

 

Also, as I said when that episode aired, I find it extremely hard to believe that Dr. Wexler had to call an ambulance to take Dean to rehab yet that was never known until they revealed it in that episode. The episodes showed that this was at the height of the cheating scandal and they were being followed everywhere by paparazzi. Yet, somehow no one noticed an ambulance coming to take Dean to rehab. I'm not buying it.

Edited June 11, 2014 by LuckyBitch

[Lablover27]

Ugh, she's just so fucking exhausting.  Soul mate...again.  Dean, I too would spoon someone else who just shut the fuck up at night after boinking too.  Really?  She was more worried about spooning then the actual fucking?    

 

Liam will be Rob Kardashian in 5 years.  

 

I want to cheat on her too.  Just to enjoy one night.  I would go for the bottle too.  Coke - no.  But the bottle maybe.  Jeez.  Is she for real?  TORture,  don't try to act like you are not buying #3 supreme every fucking night.  "In moderation".  TORtured is so screwed up her moderation level is all screwed up.

 

I couldn't imagine my marriage hinged on knocking boots more than ONE time a week to keep my man happy.  

 

Oh, the simple life of once a month and the surprise afternoon delights in between (my personal favorites;)  I couldn't imagine "we always are intimate the night before I leave" like it's her fault and so he cheated.  Oh, and the simple life of not sleeping with a cheater.  Stella, Hattie, it's not suppose to be this way honey bunnys. 

 

TORTured will be her next show.

Edited June 11, 2014 by Lablover27

[tvallthetime]

Her narration is the worst acting she's done in years. She's playing the poor betrayed "single mom" angle for sympathy, yet all I can feel is pity and mild disgust toward her for her childlike delusions and narcissism. She and Dean deserve each other.

I still don't understand how it's fair to Dean that they see TORI'S longtime therapist, especially the one who ended Tori's first marriage.

[GaT]

I'm surprised Tori doesn't get "it's all about me!" tattooed on her forehead, that was just pathetic. Did anyone else notice how they never showed her talking straight on? She was shot from the side during every TH, you could see her looking to the right, I guess that's her good side. 

 

 

Loved the "but my kids eat healthy" while she was scarfing the tacos.

Tori must be keeping a list of everything people say about her & come up with "answers" to disprove the things she doesn't like. People think she has an eating disorder & that she's too skinny? No problem, watch Tori eat tacos, people mention that her kids only seem to eat junk? no problem, mention how they eat healthy.

 

Why didn't Dean get to talk?

[cooksdelight]

I'm convinced that the sex she never talks about is something simple like doing it doggie style. Something tells me that Tori has only ever had missionary position sex, and she thinks that's what everyone does and doing anything different is bizarre. OMG, I'm typing like she talks, I'm ready for Tori rehab.

WHAT is her obsession with knowing the details of Dean's sexcapades? That is sick. Really.

I am going to save this episode for those times when I am feeling queasy but can't quite get sick and throw up. This show will do it.

[RealityCowgirl]

What the hell did I just watch? I'm speechless. I'm also completely convinced that most to all of her life has been (in her head) some version of an Aaron Spelling TV show, where she's a (lead!!!!) character and the ultimate heroine the world exists to cheer on. The lack of self-awareness, or grip on reality (not TV "reality," actual reality), demonstrated here was stunning.

We've left "fairy tale." We're not even in "fantasy" territory. We're talking about science fiction here. Not *good* science fiction. She's a Spelling, after all...

:)

Edited June 11, 2014 by RealityCowgirl

[tabloidlover]

The other part that irked was when she again LIED by claiming that Dean went straight into "treatment" after that session in Dr. Wexler's office where he talked about wanting to jump out the window. She said they didn't even have a chance to have a conversation about the infidelity because he went right into "treatment". Again, her timeline does not add up.

 

She can't even keep her lies straight, for fuck's sake.  Earlier in this same episode, she said as soon as she found out about the  "affair"  they went  "immediately into counseling".  So which is it, Tori?  Immediately into counseling or straight into treatment?  If you are gonna supposedly be real and lay it out for everyone, at least have the courtesy to get your sTori straight. 

[Angeltoes]

The reference to Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward made me smirk since they also started their fairy tale as an affair.

[tabloidlover]

My opinion of  "Dr"  Wexler dropped even further tonight.  Every time Dean would say "I feel like I can't win"  she completely ignored him and went back to Tori's neediness.  This is why she shouldn't be both Tori's therapist and their marriage counselor.  Conflict of interest.  Dean had valid points at times, but they were just ignored so that we could re-focus our attention on the narcissistic needs of Tori. 

 

Tori needs to get a clue about communication as well.  When she was being dramatic about her dad's death and Dean making it all about him, I completely understood where Dean was going with that.  He was being empathetic and relating his own story of losing a  parent.  But Tori's head is so far up her own ass, she doesn't get it.  She just wants sympathy and pity, not empathy.

[jennylauren123]

Looking at Tori, I'm wondering what could be done to improve her looks. Tone down the lip color, lighten up the eye color, darken and thicken the eyebrows, lowlights and maybe some layers in the hair? I'm definitely not an expert, but her look is very strange, and I don't just mean the plastic surgery. 

[helloagain]

WHAT is her obsession with knowing the details of Dean's sexcapades? That is sick. Really.

 

Personally, I get why she wants to know the details.  I would obsess over shit like, did they do this? did they do that? like she seemingly is.  I would rather just know the truth because I feel like the truth is easier for me to deal with in the long run.  I wouldn't have to wonder, I would know.

 

I consider myself a monogamous person, but I also don't believe in long term monogamy.  For me it would be different if my SO cheated because he wanted to get his dick wet with some strange, or if he cheated and then they cuddled afterwards.  Cuddling to me is emotional, so I can understand her wanting to know.  An emotional affair would definitely hurt me more than a physical affair.

 

Anyway, I did not watch this crap but of course was curious to see what everyone was saying about it.

 

"Let's just say Donna Martin graduated."  Huh?  So she put on some sexy lingerie for Dean and laid on the bed and waited for Dean to enter the room to surprise him, because that's how she graduated with David Silver. 

[kacesq]

I just can't with Tori. Everytime I watch this show, I'm struck by how completely lacking in self-awareness she is, how needy she is, and how narcisstic she is. I laughed when she was whining to Dean that he had "made a commitment" to this family. Yes, Tori, he had. He also made a commitment to Mary Jo and Jack and we all know how that turned out. I'm just gobsmacked that she really truly believes she deserves this completely charmed fairy tale life as if she's the most special princess ever.

 

I do think they're angling for a second season; all of Tori's quasi-dramatic pronouncements of "I don't know what will happen" during her talking heads screamed "Renew us for a 2nd season and we'll string this crap out for ya, Lifetime!" I also hated those talking heads. Is that supposed to be serious, deeply hurt yet brave, courageous Tori? Because to me, it was still more whiny me, me, me Tori.

 

And for all of Dean's "babe I love you!" "Babe you're the best thing that ever happendd to me!" pronouncements, I don't believe him. I do not get this feeling of overwhelming love from Dean to Tori. I wonder if Tori picks up on that and that's why she's such a needy insecure mess. Although I suspect she'd still be one even if he was madly, passionately in love with her.

[cooksdelight]

Nobody's ever going to be enough of a mate for Tori unless they have themselves attached to her, ala Siamese twins, so she knows where they are 24/7 and can control their every movement.

I think the only reason Dean is still around is because he loves those four adorable kids. He realizes how much he fucked up with Mary Jo and leaving that family, and he's trying to stick around so his kids with Tori don't get the same treatment. At least, I hope that's why. Otherwise, he's as nutty as a fruitcake.

[Mckinnonsgirl]

Tori was doing her worst Donna Martin giggle when she was eating tacos... oh, you poor delusional fool Tori, life is not a walking soap opera unless you let it be!

 

I stand by my earlier assessment, I truly believe she needs to be in front of the camera to define her as a person, without them she has no idea what to do with herself and my heart breaks for those children because they are going to turn out just as messed up as her.

 

edited: because I can't use the excuse that it's auto-corrects fault. :)

Edited June 11, 2014 by Mckinnonsgirl

[chlban]

The reference to Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward made me smirk since they also started their fairy tale as an affair.

Yes, but their fairy tale lasted over 50 years until his death. No easy feat for anyone and I am just old enough to remember when every mom in the neighorhood thought Paul was the hottest guy in the world (alhtough I'm sure they probably didn't describe him as hot).  George Clooney and Brad Pitt have nothing on him in his heyday.  

 

I wouldn't take any bets on Sleaze bag and his cray cray wife making it another five years. 

[Frisco]

Where do I begin....all this talk of soul mates, true love, Tori's constant crying/hysterics.  Even Liam and Stella pretty much ignore Tori when she's crying, I'm sure they are used to it.  You met him while you were both married to others and then lived in fear that Dean would cheat?  More children will not keep Dean from cheating.  If they want to stay together they need to work out their problems privately, not on tv.  Ahh, who am I kidding, that will never happen.  LOL

[Neurochick]

Should I bother to watch this mess "on demand?"

 

What is "self awareness" really?  Does it mean caring about how you come off to others?  Should people always worry about how they come off to others?   Not being nasty, just asking.  I think I'll wait until Sunday to watch this mess, so I can FF past most of it.  Oh, did Dean sing again?

[cooksdelight]

To me personally, self awareness is not saying "fuck you" to the old lady in front of you at the grocery store who's taking an hour to write a check.

It's being sure you don't come off as a raving lunatic to the general public. I think.

[RealityCowgirl]

To me personally, self awareness is not saying "fuck you" to the old lady in front of you at the grocery store who's taking an hour to write a check.

It's being sure you don't come off as a raving lunatic to the general public. I think.

That. I honestly believe the fantasy is very, very real to her - despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary (which she seems to discard with ease). Edited June 11, 2014 by RealityCowgirl

[cooksdelight]

She belongs in Disneyland, in Cinderella's castle, behind a glass case/window, so people can watch her twirl and live a wonderful life.

[JustAlison]

Well, at the end of this mess of a show, I came away with this.

 

Dean is a sociopath. Not a murderous psychotic type, just your garden variety low level sociopath who skates through life guessing at real emotion and getting pissy when the ruse gets boring or he's not getting the results he wants. The most honest Deano was the entirety of the show run was when he told Tori's horrified friend he cheated because 'I didn't think I'd get caught'. See, the thing with socios is, they want to fit in, They want to be like other people. So they do try, at times, to do what they think others want. Dean was told to be honest, so he tried that. He really did cheat because he thought he wouldn't get caught. Unfortunately, the results of Dean's attempts at honesty were shit. No one wanted to hear the truth. Everyone who is not a sociopath wants there to be another answer, a better answer. Dean recognized that folks like Tori's friend don't really want honesty, unless it's an answer they can understand and accept. ' I didn't think I'd get caught' is a perfectly reasonable answer to the question, if you're sociopathic. But if you're not, you look for something deeper...a more meaningful reason. Sociopaths don't have deeper places. Dean knew his attempt at actual honesty was pointless, by Tori's friend's reaction.  So he flipped that script back real quick, and went back to 'I cheated because of addiction/low self esteem/not enough sex/whatever you want to hear'.  There's no hope for Dean, because we don't know how to treat sociopathy. He will spend his whole life manipulating people and mimicking feelings he doesn't actually have.  And he will continue to be successful at it, because the world is full of Toris and Mary Jos. Most people don't recognize sociopaths in their own lives, let alone ones coming with roses and empty promises.

 

The saddest of all are the five children mixed in this mess. They will forever wonder why they never got what they needed from their Dad, even though he often says the right things and takes them places. I really hope someone someday tells them what's up with Dean, so they don't spend their lives longing for what he can never give.

Edited June 11, 2014 by JustAlison

[sandyskyblue]

Sorry, having issues trying to delete a post!!  Looking for how to do it, but no luck, can someone help, please!!

I wanted to comment on one of cook's delight posts, the one about how Tori wanted to know the details of Dean's affair....I'm somewhat familiar with this sort of situation, and I believe it might be quite common that the cheated on spouse wants to know the gory details because otherwise, the cheated on spouse makes up scenarios in their mind as to what happened, and those ideas are probably worse than the actual details....I think it helps to know what happened (if the cheater can be truthful about it all) so that the cheated on spouse can work through it...I believe Tori might have said something similar during this show, and that is probably the only time I will ever agree with her about anything!!

Edited June 11, 2014 by sandyskyblue

[cooksdelight]

 

I believe it might be quite common that the cheated on spouse wants to know the gory details

 

Not in my case. My ex cheated on me the entire time we were married. At no point did I want to hear details. Or know their names, or where they lived, etc. I wanted to put it behind me and move on with my life. Which is what I did. Tori can't do that, because she'd rather wallow in self-pity.

[Sarah D. Bunting]

If/when the shteez got real on the "Confessions" episode!

[Sims Addict]

Not in my case. My ex cheated on me the entire time we were married. At no point did I want to hear details. Or know their names, or where they lived, etc. I wanted to put it behind me and move on with my life. Which is what I did. Tori can't do that, because she'd rather wallow in self-pity.

 

And not only that, but she'd have to admit that, despite both of their protestations to the contrary, she is no better than his first wife. She probably thought she was the exception to the rule. Popping out babies right and left, maintaining a scary double-digit weight, and bleaching her hair to high hell made not one difference in the end.

[psychoticstate]

She was more worried about spooning then the actual fucking?

 

 

helloagain said it very well but as someone whose spouse cheated on her, I totally get this.   Sex can be nothing but a physical act with no emotional connection whatsoever.  The thought that Dean may have spooned this girl or held her or really opened up and talked to her indicates this wasn't just an instance of getting some strange because he could.  And it may also remind Tori of what may have happened with herself and Dean the first day they met.  Tori has constantly said in her other reality shows that she worries that Dean will do the same to her that he's done to Mary Jo.  Makes perfect sense.

 

Very clear to me that this "lost footage" or whatever was nothing more than a way for Tori to say "See?  This is why I stayed with Dean.  The show was his grand gesture to me."   I actually think that statement is 100% true.  I had posted several times over on TWOP that I didn't understand what Dean was getting out of this show - - if anything, the first few episodes made him look even WORSE.  I had speculated that maybe Tori demanded he do this show as a penance and in order to keep the marriage going.  I have no doubt of it now. 

 

And because it can't be said enough - - Dr. Wexler is a quack.  I think Dean is a huge piece of shit but the therapy sessions were obviously to help Tori, not to help their marriage.  Big difference. 

[jenh526]

 

Dean is a sociopath.

 

Yeah, I second this. In some ways, I do feel some empathy for Tori, given that sociopaths can be very charming and are extremely good at telling you exactly what you want to hear. Given her past history with emotionally abusive men, he must have seemed like her salvation. I get it, but I think if Dr. Wexler was really worth her salt, then she'd be telling Tori to move on... fast.

[4leafclover]

Interesting theory--but I see Dean as more of a "not the sharpest knife in the drawer" type.  He implied in a therapy session that his "affair" was not emotional, just physical.  I think he felt the same way when he jumped into bed with Tori a few hours after they met but then she ran with the "fairy tale, soul mate" idea and he (seemed to have) stupidly got caught up in it as well (maybe for the Spelling name?  Who knows?).  You can look at him and see blank space between the ears---and he has followed all of her ideas (the B&B, the antique shop, living on a "farm" for 10 minutes then moving back to LA, etc....)  HE seems to be the one without a "voice!"

[GaT]

 

I'm convinced that the sex she never talks about is something simple like doing it doggie style.

I can't tell you how much I didn't need an image of Dean & Tori doing it doggy style in my head. 

 

 

Sorry, having issues trying to delete a post!!  Looking for how to do it, but no luck, can someone help, please!!

You can't do it yourself, click on the report button on the post & ask the mod to delete it & they'll take care of it.

[TheRealT]

 

Dean is a sociopath.

I agree. The thing is, Tori is just as fucked up, just in a slightly different way. She brings self-absorption to a whole new level, she's endlessly needy and whiny, she has an eating disorder, she's delusional and childish, etc., etc., etc. I'm sure that she's a NIGHTMARE to live with (not that I have any sympathy for Dean). The most interesting thing about the "therapy" sessions was watching the two of them jockey to keep the spotlight on themselves while avoiding taking any responsibility for anything. I was actually impressed by Dean's ability to bogard most of the sessions from Tori, who is clearly a master at keeping the focus on her and her myriad issues, particularly with her bought and paid for enabler, Dr. Wexler.

 

I don't think that Tori is any more capable of being in a healthy relationship than Dean is, particularly since she seems to have zero self-awareness and her idea of "working on herself" is apparently to do "treatment" with Dr. Enabling Famewhore for the better part of a decade (if not longer). Tori can't even take her head out of her ass long enough to give the slightest consideration to how her kids feel or how her choices affect them; everything is ME ME ME. I actually think Dean would be easier to deal with (though he's a shitty person too).

[babykin]

Dean is a sociopath.

 

 

So much yes to this. And Tori is a narcissist. So I guess this is what happens when those psychopathies meet?

 

@JustAlison I dated a narc/socio for 5 years. Broke up 3 months before our wedding. Your description is so scary dead on, it made me shudder. These monsters don't change and there is no cure. They just ruin your life.

 

So I guess they will just stay together, he will cheat, and she will cry. Just a big pile of crazy.

Edited June 11, 2014 by babykin

[sandyskyblue]

I can't tell you how much I didn't need an image of Dean & Tori doing it doggy style in my head. 

 

You can't do it yourself, click on the report button on the post & ask the mod to delete it & they'll take care of it.

Thanks, GaT!!  

[iwasish]

I don't get Tori's interest in who Dean fucked, how he fucked her, when, or why or even where. The fact is he cheated. If it was Hilary Clinton would it make a difference? To me those details are a distraction and a deflection from the issue.

Dean was looking for a reason to get his dick wet. He stockpiled a bunch of stuff, no sex the night before he left, Tori is boring in bed, he's an alcoholic etc, that he could use to justify/explain/excuse his behavior and make her think it was at least partially her fault. That's what cheaters do. I'll bet almost everyone who has been cheated on has gotten the same type of excuses from their partner. In the end it's 100 % on the cheater.

[psychoticstate]

@JustAlison I dated a narc/socio for 5 years. Broke up 3 months before our wedding. Your description is so scary dead on, it made me shudder. These monsters don't change and there is no cure. They just ruin your life.

 

 

@babykin, I'm in the process of divorcing one now.  They truly do not see and do not CARE about what they inflict on others and the effect that has.  The only need sociopaths have with others is what others can do for them.  Once you are no longer "valuable" to them or provide them with what they need, you are expendable and they move on to the next victim. 

 

Worst mistake I ever made and divorcing him is no easier than living with him and dealing with the many dysfunctions and issues.  I wish I had seen them earlier and gotten out as you did.

[DangerousMinds]

Interesting theory--but I see Dean as more of a "not the sharpest knife in the drawer" type.  He implied in a therapy session that his "affair" was not emotional, just physical.  I think he felt the same way when he jumped into bed with Tori a few hours after they met but then she ran with the "fairy tale, soul mate" idea and he (seemed to have) stupidly got caught up in it as well (maybe for the Spelling name?  Who knows?).  You can look at him and see blank space between the ears---and he has followed all of her ideas (the B&B, the antique shop, living on a "farm" for 10 minutes then moving back to LA, etc....)  HE seems to be the one without a "voice!"

I agree with you. I definitely don't think all cheating spouses are sociopaths. Dean may well be, but I also think he has sexual needs and preferences that perhaps aren't easily met in a conventional monogamous marriage and although he wants to be faithful, he keeps finding that he can't. And yes, i think he did it because he thought he could get away with it and it was just a weekend fling. Tori can't possibly understand this, so there they are. Dean ends up having to try and find "rational" explanations for the cheating other than the plain old truth. I don't really think they will be compatible for a long-term marriage.

 

ETA: Thanks to all who bit the bullet and watched this! After reading here I think I'll just delete the show without watching. It's fun reading the comments here, but watching can be painful.

Edited June 12, 2014 by DangerousMinds

[car54]

Someone needs to explain the whole reality show rules to them.   After the "reunion" you are supposed to STAHP talking and go home.

[Lablover27]

The reference to Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward made me smirk since they also started their fairy tale as an affair.

 

Really?  I never knew that!

If/when the shteez got real on the "Confessions" episode!

 

Thanks for the link!  "The Truman Show.  Heh.    I never noticed there were recaps here.  Do I go to "shows?"

 

ETA:  Oh, I found it.  Click on "Features"  'The Truman Show'   Still finding my way around here.

Edited June 12, 2014 by Lablover27

[realityplease]

Tori's likely writing her next book - should be titled "Ignoring HisTORI." 

 

She knows he cheated, she eked out the details (though she didn't seem to believe him anyway) and even suspects he cheated other times.  But because he made a grand gesture in letting this series be aired and swears it won't happen again, she's ok with that?? Because they were "soul mates" in a "fairy tale" after he accepted that he was getting Tori Spelling (the Star and all that implies!) when he married her??? What?????!!!!  That was 8 years ago. Things change. Stuff happens.  Forgive him if you want, but don't justify it with more delusion.

 

They both have their heads so far up their own butts that neither can see (or ignores) what the other one needs. Their friction isn't new.  They were butting heads even when there were only two kids.  If they stay together, he's gonna be paying for his indiscretion for the rest of his life so long as she's stubbornly holding on to her her fairy tale and exercising her "voice" to rub his nose in it.  Doesn't have to be that way, but they'd have to face reality (events as they ARE, not as they want them to be) and move forward together day by day -- sans fairy tale. 

 

And those poor kids? No wrist tattoo in the world is going to reverse the sight of seeing Mom wallowing in misery and crying a river of "happy" tears. It's only ink - not fairy dust.  Nor will outlandish and expensive birthday parties make up for crazy dysfunction the whole rest of the year.

[drdawnffl]

So I'm more interested in what Dean's tattoos will look like after the divorce...I'm thinking a few new bars/designs to cover the "tori" on the cross (should be easy fix).

But the one with her face--I'm thinking he buries it in a giant octopus arm sleeve. I would actually watch him on one of those shows where they redo bad tats.

[GaT]

 

Tori Spelling spends '$6K on daughter Stella's birthday party' with luxurious pampering session at high end spa

Sushi, every 6 years old childs favorite food. Tori really has no concept of reality, I can see doing this for a 16 years old kid, but not a 6 years old kid.

 

I'm not trying to be mean, but what is wrong with the skin on Tori's nose & cheeks? It looks lumpy, I wonder if she had some bad plastic surgery.

[babykin]

@babykin, I'm in the process of divorcing one now.  They truly do not see and do not CARE about what they inflict on others and the effect that has.  The only need sociopaths have with others is what others can do for them.  Once you are no longer "valuable" to them or provide them with what they need, you are expendable and they move on to the next victim.

Worst mistake I ever made and divorcing him is no easier than living with him and dealing with the many dysfunctions and issues.  I wish I had seen them earlier and gotten out as you did.

 

 

@psychoticstate I am sending you the biggest internet hugs I have. I am so sorry. By the time I moved out, I was in a pretty bad state. The good news is, you are out now. And you know what he is.

 

Sorry ... I don't think everyone that cheats is a sociopath either. With Dean, it is the consistent cheating, the lack of any true understanding of emotions or the real pain of someone else other than himself. Maybe he's a narcissist only. They are both disordered and it's crazy f-ed up to see it fully laid out. 

 

The poor poor kids. 

Edited June 12, 2014 by babykin

[EmeraldGirl]

I actually kind of get Tori's morbid curiosity about the girl. I didn't get cheated on, but I too wanted every detail (but not sexual!) of who an ex boyfriend ended up with. What she looked like, acted like, did, family. But yeah, not bedroom stuff! Probably because I was onto someone else and not with him.

I think these two are on the same level - crazy, insecure, probable addicts (Tori is a total love addict in addition to drama and probably pills). She and Dean seem to thrive on the drama they create. They are the worst pairing and so toxic for kids. But I don't think either one of them would be happy without an equally unstable dramatic partner. They're not young people anymore either - the time to grow out of that was in their 20s. Now they're stuck and having sex in clown cars (thanks Tori for making my mind think the worst)!

[GreyBunny]

My exposure to this show has been via The Soup and from what I could glean:

Dean is a creepy, self-absorbed sleazebag.

Tori is a needy, self-absorbed whiner.

They both must be terrible in bed.

The kids would be better off raised by wolves.

[Lablover27]

My exposure to this show has been via The Soup and from what I could glean:

Dean is a creepy, self-absorbed sleazebag.

Tori is a needy, self-absorbed whiner.

They both must be terrible in bed.

The kids would be better off raised by wolves.

 

Yup.  The only thing you left out is... please tip the waitresses on your way out.  Thank you and good night.

Edited June 12, 2014 by Lablover27