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S06.E17: After The Decisions


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Sometimes I think the ONLY way this show will ever have any chance of improving is for TPTB to actually LISTEN to what prior 'contestants' (cuz this is WAY too much like a game show!) have actually listed as a criteria and eliminate any who can't pass a lie detector test....especially total asshats like Ryan and Molly....Back in the dark ages, when my great-great-grandparents in the 'old country' reached 'marriageable' age and their respective parents decided who would be married to whom...like it or not...there was at least some logic to the selection process (family status, procreative records, etc).

I guess what I'm trying to say is....'.give me a reason to want to marry you, and I'll consider it, BUT I still get to have the final say-so' Which would, of course, mean that each possible bride/groom would have to be given some (albeit non-identifiable) information about their prospective spouse - which would most likely not happen as it would blow the whole nasty hit and run premise to shreds. Oh well.

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I am so impressed with Jephte on this show.  I think he is very self-aware, knows what he can and can't deal with and at what pace he has to do things.  He has a quiet wisdom, and I think the beginning of this marriage could have been easier had he been able to better express that wisdom.  I would love to know what his Myers-Briggs type is.  I had a sense early on with his whole "stranger" thing is about taking things slowly and let them happen organically and that's something this show is not designed to do.  I think this whole thing was excruciating for him, and he's so reserved that he was unable to effectively communicate with Shawniece.  I do think that these are two very bright people who, as they say, love in different ways.  I do think, though, that Shawniece is going to have to do ALL the emotional heavy lifting in this relationship, and as someone who's been there, I know that can be difficult.  I'm really rooting for this couple to succeed long-term because they both seem to be really good people.

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(edited)

Definitely no love lost between Jon and Ryan.

Anybody else think that Jon and Mollie had better body language on the couch than Jackie and Ryan?  

Edited by Koalagirl
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Molly getting pissed and shooting daggers at everyone, while refusing to give evidence of Jon starting the fight or being mean to her, is classic Molly.  And it's giving me life.  I'm getting popcorn and waiting for her head to explode. 

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21 minutes ago, Stinamaia said:

Jon finally said it: I don’t want to be in an abusive relationship.

The End

And you notice that after Jon said that, everybody got real quiet and they quickly moved on to Jephte and Shawnice.

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Truth is, Molly was the real child in that marriage, NOT Jon! She is one of the most self centered, self absorbed, uncaring people ever on this show. I truly believe she only wanted on MAFS for TV exposure and stardom. She has no idea her inward ugliness takes away any of her possible physical beauty. Molly, YOU are the one who is unattractive. Definitely not Jon!  

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34 minutes ago, psychoticstate said:

I see that time has not given Molly any perspective.  She still can't accept any responsibility.

The reunion was filmed 3 weeks after decision day.   It was filmed on Nov 20.   So the season hadn't aired yet

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Molly was trying to make herself sound better with the "if he wanted to keep trying, I would," but she was lying and Jon knew it. Good for him for calling it out and for straight up calling the relationship abusive. Molly was PISSED. She gets mad when she can't control the narrative, and she couldn't do that at all here.

Shawniece's makeup was too much. Her eye and lip colors clashed. Her wig was cute though. I howled when Shawniece was talking about how she goes all in with love and Jephte said simply "I think that's so dumb." I literally laughed out loud. One thing I like about Jephte is that he's always seemed genuine - I think who he is on this show is who he is IRL, and I appreciate that about him. Actually, I think that's true for both of them but they're just different personalities. Shawniece is way more outgoing, and Jephte is reserved. I like that they both know themselves really well, which will help them.

Dr. Pepper: "Our third couple, Ryan and Jacklyn, seemed to have the most passion." Me: "Ew, are they gonna talk about sex?" Because yet and still, Ryan is so unsexy to me.

Why'd they drag Jon's friend into this when ain't nobody seen her since the wedding? 

I think this would have been better if they'd waited a while before filming. @Northerner says it was filmed three weeks later and it was pretty obvious that not a lot of time had elapsed. I think some more distance would have made for a more interesting reunion (that was pretty dull and definitely didn't need to be 90 minutes long). Maybe they wanted to film it quickly so they could log a more successful season.

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Jackie and Ryan don’t look or sound like a couple that is still together, or at least planning on being together in the future... there was a whole lotta awkwardness and tense body language going on. 

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Just now, EctoGammat said:

Jackie and Ryan don’t look or sound like a couple that is still together, or at least planning on being together in the future... there was a whole lotta awkwardness and tense body language going on. 

I agree. I don't follow anyone on social media so I'm in the dark about what has transpired IRL. Also, I thought I heard Ryan using past tense when referring to something that he liked about Jackie (or something like that) and then caught himself a bit and said, "...and I still do." I think she dumped him within an hour of filming the final decision.

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I honestly thought that we were going to be updated at the reunion with the news that Jackie and Ryan had split after decision day based on the way they were sitting on the couch.

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That was kind of a waste of 90 minutes. Besides a little bonus footage, we learned so little. My husband felt like the experts or the show were highlighting so much of the negative (all of which we have seen many times).

I was waiting for Ryan or Jackie to say they were over. She looked so sad. When they were watching all the footage she looked like she was going to cry multiple times, her eyes were watery and red. 

I wish they could have taped the reunion within the last month. The experts did not have to be there.  I assume the experts schedule dictates all taping times. I would take Jamie hosting the reunion if it could have been taped in March or April instead of last year. 

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Who does Molly think she's kidding that she would have decided to stay married if Jon wanted to.?  She was just saying that to (once again) make herself look good and him bad.  This is part of the abuse that he was talking about.  And she keeps referring to some supposedly childish behavior that turned her off when she first met him, but she has never articulated what exactly that was.  I don't buy that she was being vague to protect him when she has no problem trying to make him look bad in other ways.  So why is it such a big secret?  I don't buy that it was really a thing but just her excuse because she wasn't in this show for the right reasons.  The experts were asking both Molly and Jon to discuss what turned them off to each other and Jon said he wasn't the one turned off initially, it was Molly.  And that's the point here, he was all in it but it takes two to tango and she just wasn't going to dance at all.  Once again, from Shawniece's remarks I got the feeling that she really likes Jon.

And yes to thinking that any minute there was going to be a revelation from Jackie that she and Ryan were splitting up.  She still looks like part of her soul is tied up in the basement with a ball gag and a sign that says "help"!  I also felt like both of them were giving a very "past tense" feeling to their comments about the relationship.

So I thought we were supposed to be expecting a twist.  Shawniece's pregnancy was not a surprise to some people so I thought there was going to be some other bombshell dropped.  Instead we got Jon's and Jepthe's friends showing up with their perspective, but that was just a big nothingburger.  It was just confirmation of stuff we already knew.

I'll do @SuzyLee one better - I have a girl AND guy crush on Jephte and Shawniece.  They impress me both separately and together more than any couple that's ever appeared on this show.  While other couples bore me I could actually watch a series about them and their newly married life and baby to come.  They don't seem the type to want the fame and attention, though, which is to their credit.

3 hours ago, brilliantbreakfast said:

I am so impressed with Jephte on this show.  I think he is very self-aware, knows what he can and can't deal with and at what pace he has to do things.  He has a quiet wisdom, and I think the beginning of this marriage could have been easier had he been able to better express that wisdom.  I would love to know what his Myers-Briggs type is.  

I was very into the MBTI for a long time.  I think Jephte's an introvert, either an ISFJ  or ISFP, especially given that he's a school teacher.  I myself am an INFJ.

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The cap makes me think Jephte and Shawniece are not going to happen. I know the pregnancy reveal was staged but Jephte looked at her in a way he has never had and Shawniece looked like she was halfway out the door.

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(edited)

Jon and Molly may have been sitting near each other,  but Jon had his legs crossed facing away from her.  ?

And did you see the camera pan to Molly's reaction when Jackie told Ryan he has charisma? Heh. ? 

Ryan has dead eyes.  No light in or behind them. Jackie,  for all her talk,  was just that: all talk. She made no demands,  gave no ultimatums. I have no doubt that, if this couple is still married, every night is still Boys' Night Out. ???

Alas, I was semi-spoiled about Shawniece's pregnancy, because of the wink,  wink,  nudge,  nudge factor. That said, I thought Jephte's nothingness when seeing the little sneaker was sad.  And even if he already knew the news,  could he not have faked SOME enthusiasm, SOME joy? No; instead he let Shawniece cry and express fear. ? ?

I still don't care for Jephte.  Briscoe,  table of one! ?

Edited by LennieBriscoe
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8 hours ago, Northerner said:

The reunion was filmed 3 weeks after decision day.   It was filmed on Nov 20.   So the season hadn't aired yet

So that is why they never asked, "Are you still together"?

I thought this show to be six months later. That is what they have done in the past.

Is there another show for six months?

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Jackie knew they were filming that day, right?  She doesn't own any hairstyling tools?  I keep waiting for her to show up with her hair styled into something resembling a style.  And I want to buy her a warehouse store sized box of oil control strips.  

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Jackie's taken steps to help her oily skin...wink, wink...

The twist was... Megan hulking on the set and confirming Jon's reports of his miserable marriage the whole 8 weeks.

Molly hates when she can't lie with impunity and without detection...

Antonio...The Jephte Whisperer...get off the panel Dr. Pepper...Antonio's got the answers...

So they sent a camera crew and a production crew over to Jephte's and Shawniece's new place, set designed a place to film with a couch for Jephte to lay on with a nice picture behind him and then Shawniece gives him a gift....what else would it be for all of this production set up...another puppy?

Baby kicks...better than a pee stick..

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I am   hesitant to bash Molly because I thought Ashley, Sheila and Vanessa and Heather were the problem in their marriage. Molly was attracted at first and lost the attraction once she got to know Jon. Not saying jon is some horrible guy but something happened. Interesting that Jon and Molly looked more comfortable and sat closer together than Ryan and  Jackie. Jackie looks shell shocked. I think it shows jons immaturity and possible cruel side that he joked about Ryan's future wife having a 7.5 size ring finger. His best female friend is heavyset and if she's truly his friend he wouldn't be making fat jokes. Ryan looked like a dork with his creepy bow tie. 

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11 hours ago, SuzyLee said:

Just 25 minutes in and all I can think is, Molly, you’re full of shit.  At this point, Jon and the experts should simply laugh in her duplicitous face and move the hell on to the other couples.  He should have taken off that wedding band and made her eat it right there on the couch.

Shawniece is just downright adorable.  From her joyful smile to her attitude toward life and marriage, she is quite the catch.  I have a total girl-crush on her.  I hope Jephte realizes how lucky he is to have been matched with her.  That discussion during their segment probably contained the most honest self-reflection and substance that we’ve ever seen in any season of this show.

I too love Shawniece-I agree that she is utterly adorable and I love her happy, sunny personality. She's such fun and so sweet. My dream is to see her in town some day and fangirl like mad. And I've come around on Jephte, whom I cordially detested at first. He does seem to be a kind person. I have high hopes for these two.

Pepper: "Jon, why are you still wearing your wedding ring?"

Jon: "Contractual obligation." Jesus, Pepper, don't be disingenuous. I hate it when they pull shit like this. We're not idiots.

Jon comported himself like a gentleman throughout. Kudos to him.

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(edited)

Molly kept scooching nearer to Jon, he  had to manspread to keep her from encroaching his personal space.

Jon could have done and done something flippant when removing his wedding ring... like shove it down Pepper's pie hole when she asked why he was still wearing it... but he didn't...

Wonder if the other couples saw the Orlando video before the reunion show...probably heard about and seen the raw footage...not the heavily produced version that made it on the show.

Feel bad for the producer/sound editor who had to listen and edit Ryan's rambling and word scrambles to make any sense of what he was saying all season...

Boy makes no damn sense when he opens his mouth,  he talks in circles until it collapses into incomprehensible word salad...

Think Ryan and Jackie's fights were louder...longer and more confrontational then what we saw on the screen...Jackie admits to walking away rather than continuing to engage in  the battles..that wasn't a good enough reason to get a divorce...what?

Edited by humbleopinion
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(edited)

So Jephte's emotional baby steps have morphed to actual baby steps. I wish them the best, but oof.

At this point I seriously wonder if Molly is deliberately lying or is truly that deluded about herself. I'm leaning towards the latter, tbh.

Edited by 2727
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57 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

I too love Shawniece-I agree that she is utterly adorable and I love her happy, sunny personality. She's such fun and so sweet. My dream is to see her in town some day and fangirl like mad. And I've come around on Jephte, whom I cordially detested at first. He does seem to be a kind person. I have high hopes for these two.

Pepper: "Jon, why are you still wearing your wedding ring?"

Jon: "Contractual obligation." Jesus, Pepper, don't be disingenuous. I hate it when they pull shit like this. We're not idiots.

Jon comported himself like a gentleman throughout. Kudos to him.

That made me laugh. "I never wear it, I'm just wearing it for the show." He probably took it off in Florida. I find it refreshing that Jon remains clear about the fact that the experience was a net negative for him - "take the L [loss]," he said outright that he regretted doing it, etc. Sometimes we just choose wrong. (Also, I know it pisses Molly off that he thinks that because she thinks so highly of herself. It probably stings a lot that someone could spend 8 weeks with her and not think themselves better for it.) I don't think he'll be sitting around wallowing about his decision to do the show for long, particularly since he has a new job now so at least the "I lost my job over this" portion is over, but I do think when he's asked about it his answer will consistently be "Yeah, I shouldn't have done that." I can think of personal and professional instances in my own life that are just straight up mistakes - I made what I thought was the best decision at the time, I was wrong, and the experiences were not positive. (In the professional instance, it added value in the sense that I got paid for the work, but overall I'd have been better off if I hadn't taken that particular job.)

It's a trip to me that Molly kept (she probably has it off now since the show has aired; the jig is up) her ring on because she didn't want to have to explain it to people at work. She just lies.

3 minutes ago, 2727 said:

So Jephte's emotional baby steps have morphed to actual baby steps. I wish them the best, but oof.

Yeah. As I might have said, my friend's sister is in the middle of splitting with her kid's father. She found out she was pregnant two months into the relationship (they may not even have been in an official relationship), figured it was her last chance, and decided to keep the baby. The baby is a year old now and the relationship is ending, and the things they've realized they don't like about each other are things they'd have discovered without a baby - they're just not compatible. I wish Jephte and Shawniece the best too, and I hope they don't grow apart as they get to know each other. It's much harder with a baby. Babies test even long-standing relationships.

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1 hour ago, kira28 said:

I am   hesitant to bash Molly because I thought Ashley, Sheila and Vanessa and Heather were the problem in their marriage. Molly was attracted at first and lost the attraction once she got to know Jon. Not saying jon is some horrible guy but something happened. Interesting that Jon and Molly looked more comfortable and sat closer together than Ryan and  Jackie. Jackie looks shell shocked. I think it shows jons immaturity and possible cruel side that he joked about Ryan's future wife having a 7.5 size ring finger. His best female friend is heavyset and if she's truly his friend he wouldn't be making fat jokes. Ryan looked like a dork with his creepy bow tie. 

Relationships are the responsibility of two people. And whether they fail is on both people. Given the shop's history of blaming the women only for it to come out later that there was way more going  on than what was on screen, I'm not inclined to believe the narrative that this is all on Molly. Especially since Jon has been doing immature things such as liking  every hateful comment about her on social media and seems a little too keen to be seen as the wronged party.

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1 hour ago, kira28 said:

I am   hesitant to bash Molly because I thought Ashley, Sheila and Vanessa and Heather were the problem in their marriage. Molly was attracted at first and lost the attraction once she got to know Jon. Not saying jon is some horrible guy but something happened. Interesting that Jon and Molly looked more comfortable and sat closer together than Ryan and  Jackie. Jackie looks shell shocked. I think it shows jons immaturity and possible cruel side that he joked about Ryan's future wife having a 7.5 size ring finger. His best female friend is heavyset and if she's truly his friend he wouldn't be making fat jokes. Ryan looked like a dork with his creepy bow tie. 

I think Jon was just engaging in some typical guy-to-guy teasing, which I guess somehow is now seen as sign of a cruel side?  Wow, reading that into his behavior seems like a huge stretch to me.  I think he has a good sense of humor, not disrespectful.  He even said he would never say that knowing the woman involved.  He probably knows that 7.5 is not a large ring size but was just joking because by comparison the other women had such small sizes.    I think one has to reach long and hard to find anything to bash Jon.  He may not be everyone's ideal guy but I don't see how he can be seen as the major source of the problems in that relationship.  Molly has even been caught on his cell phone being a total abusive bitch and that's still not enough to know that she is the major source of the toxicity in that relationship?

3 minutes ago, aphroditewitch said:

Relationships are the responsibility of two people. And whether they fail is on both people. Given the shop's history of blaming the women only for it to come out later that there was way more going  on than what was on screen, I'm not inclined to believe the narrative that this is all on Molly. Especially since Jon has been doing immature things such as liking  every hateful comment about her on social media and seems a little too keen to be seen as the wronged party.

I don't see liking every hateful comment about her as some sign of a character defect.  The guy risked just about EVERYTHING for this show and got matched with a total narcissistic bitch.  I'd like every hateful comment too if I were him.  That's only natural, not immature in my opinion.  He has a right to express his opinion on this after being royally screwed over.

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(edited)
1 hour ago, kira28 said:

I think it shows jons immaturity and possible cruel side that he joked about Ryan's future wife having a 7.5 size ring finger.

Why were they told the ring size? I thought they knew NOTHING about each other until the alter.

The jewelry store could have gotten the ring size from the producers. The show is paying for the rings.

Edited by OnTime
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(edited)
1 hour ago, kira28 said:

I am   hesitant to bash Molly because I thought Ashley, Sheila and Vanessa and Heather were the problem in their marriage. Molly was attracted at first and lost the attraction once she got to know Jon. Not saying jon is some horrible guy but something happened. Interesting that Jon and Molly looked more comfortable and sat closer together than Ryan and  Jackie. Jackie looks shell shocked. I think it shows jons immaturity and possible cruel side that he joked about Ryan's future wife having a 7.5 size ring finger. His best female friend is heavyset and if she's truly his friend he wouldn't be making fat jokes. Ryan looked like a dork with his creepy bow tie. 

He didn't make a fat joke; he made a her-hands-are-the-biggest joke. You can be overweight and have small hands. I'm not overweight and I have big hands (I'm tall). I don't even know what ring size I am (I have a ring that I wear constantly on my right hand; it was a gift but fuck if I know what size it is), and saying someone wears a 7.5 ring tells me literally nothing, because I just don't know about ring sizes. I doubt Jon does either - he just knows that it's bigger than the other two women's sizes, so he made a joke. Jephte did too - actually, the whole thing started with Jephte. And as Jon pointed out, he hasn't teased Jackie in any other way since he met her because you can't make fun of someone else's wife like that.

Jon is not perfect (as I've said, I understand intellectually that he is attractive but he doesn't do anything for me) but IMO he comes off as the most mature of the three men despite his sarcastic sense of humor. He's had the most life experience (the military, travel, serious relationships) and it shows. Jackie even describes Ryan as childlike, which IMO is not a compliment for a 29-year-old man, WTF? 

Edited by Empress1
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Relationships aren't a zero sum game. Molly being in the wrong doesn't necessarily mean Jon was in the right.

Molly joins the company of such luminaries as Ashley, Samantha, Heather, and Sean who to different degrees all shut down and refused to be open to any overtures from their spouses. That doesn't mean their spouses were perfect, but I would still place the majority of the blame on them for being unwilling to try.

All of them should be forced to watch a repeat reel of their casting interviews where they proclaim there's NOTHING THEY WANT MORE in life than to be married.
 

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(edited)
52 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

I think Jon was just engaging in some typical guy-to-guy teasing, which I guess somehow is now seen as sign of a cruel side?  Wow, reading that into his behavior seems like a huge stretch to me.  I think he has a good sense of humor, not disrespectful.  He even said he would never say that knowing the woman involved.  He probably knows that 7.5 is not a large ring size but was just joking because by comparison the other women had such small sizes.    I think one has to reach long and hard to find anything to bash Jon.  He may not be everyone's ideal guy but I don't see how he can be seen as the major source of the problems in that relationship.  Molly has even been caught on his cell phone being a total abusive bitch and that's still not enough to know that she is the major source of the toxicity in that relationship?

I don't see liking every hateful comment about her as some sign of a character defect.  The guy risked just about EVERYTHING for this show and got matched with a total narcissistic bitch.  I'd like every hateful comment too if I were him.  That's only natural, not immature in my opinion.  He has a right to express his opinion on this after being royally screwed over.

I disagree. People who are mature  don't engage in petty nonsense like that. And considering he was teasing some twist during the reunion that was a big nothing and also didn't involve him, I find myself concluding that he is an attention seeking loser. Molly might be a bitch, but Jon is a jackass. They both engaged in emotional abuse, and he should be called out for it too. 

Edited by aphroditewitch
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8 hours ago, biakbiak said:

The cap makes me think Jephte and Shawniece are not going to happen. I know the pregnancy reveal was staged but Jephte looked at her in a way he has never had and Shawniece looked like she was halfway out the door.

I really hope you're wrong --especially now that there's a child involved. 

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Quote

he'll be sitting around wallowing about his decision to do the show for long, particularly since he has a new job now so at least the "I lost my job over this" portion is over, but I do think when he's asked about it his answer will consistently be "Yeah, I shouldn't have done that." I can think of personal and professional instances in my own life that are just straight up mistakes - I made what I thought was the best decision at the time, I was wrong, and the experiences were not positive. (In the professional instance, it added value in the sense that I got paid for the work, but overall I'd have been better off if I hadn't taken that particular job.

He didn't make a wrong decision to be married at first sight. he just got hooked up with the wrong person. I still can't come to a certain conclusion whether what transpired would have occurred no matter who was picked for Molly (I pray they don't ask her to do the second chances show, I'd hate to see her emasculate one man after another). It seemed like the chair they put Jon and Molly in had less room than the other seats but it didn't appear Molly skin was crawling. Shawniece cut through the bull and said (primarily to Molly) you forgot how much you desired to be married. I can't believe she's still clinging to this 99% it was just the little tiny one percent that made her find him disgusting and her skin crawl at his touch and caused her to be abusive. 

I loved Molly's reaction to Ryan's suggestion Jon charge in the room naked and demand his woman. I think the idea had appeal to her...I still imagine her finding a rough and tumble tattooed biker type that won't put up with Molly's baggage...

I believe Jephte and Shawnice are in for the long haul.

Ryan and Jacklyn are doomed. She needs to get rid of him and take some time at the beauty salon. Shawniece can take her...

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It's funny that they had friends show up for jephte and  Jon but no one wants to claim on national TV that they associate with Ryan lol. Not that I blame them 

If he and Jackie were still together at this taping it's only because the show offered them a bonus. They looked so incredibly uncomfortable and awkward and even they way they talked sounded like it was over. Jackie mentioned something about how she learned you shouldn't say hurtful things in an argument. The first few months of getting to know someone is the best. Of all she and Ryan did was fight and  argue they are a terrible match. 

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5 hours ago, kira28 said:

I am   hesitant to bash Molly because I thought Ashley, Sheila and Vanessa and Heather were the problem in their marriage. Molly was attracted at first and lost the attraction once she got to know Jon. Not saying jon is some horrible guy but something happened. 

While I really think Molly shoulders the blame for the marriage not even getting a shot I have gone over all the reasons why the show might edit Jon better or hide something Jon did or said. My only guess would be something do do with PTSD or military related. I'm not saying Jon has PTSD, he seems fine, but it was the only thing I could come up with that Molly would be afraid to say. I just thought about last big brother season and what  happened when Cody (who was a 32? year old Veteran)  had some fellow contestants try to push his buttons about his service and the backlash those people got and the show got . In fact Cody left the show pretty early on which usually means earlyto leave,  less popularity/after show oppurtunites but Cody was voted America's favorite and got to go on Amazing Race. There was a firm stand from America do not pick on a vet for any reason. If Molly who went to acting college is looking for some future on TV from MAFS maybe she would be too scared to bring up if she thought he had any post military issues. Or Molly could have seen Jon get mad once over something normal and label it something it was not. Again I do not think he had any signs of PTSD but since we now the show edits crazy , and big brother was on my mind I thought of it. 

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I guess the death threats on SM really got to Molly as she tried her hardest to act like a good person.  Nobody fell for it.   Looks aren't everything.

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17 hours ago, Neurochick said:

And you notice that after Jon said that, everybody got real quiet and they quickly moved on to Jephte and Shawnice.

I did notice that!  This show wasn't meant for people to just be honest and blunt - they want the vague blatherings of Jackie and Ryan and Molly, so that the "experts" can offer platitudes in return.

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