Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality

[Mabinogia]

18 minutes ago, Danielg342 said:

My heists are always accompanied by operatic symphonic metal music. Makes them seem more grand than they actually are. 😀

Nice. Next time you're having one, call me. I'd love to do some slow-mo walking away from an explosion while some Nightwish plays triumphantly in the background. 

[Anduin]

21 hours ago, possibilities said:

Heists on TV are always accompanied by jaunty music.

As a cybercriminal, my crimes are done in darkened rooms with bad EDM playing far too loud. There may be some flashing lights to accompany typing on the keyboard really fast.

[Danielg342]

4 minutes ago, Mabinogia said:

Nice. Next time you're having one, call me. I'd love to do some slow-mo walking away from an explosion while some Nightwish plays triumphantly in the background. 

Sounds good. Tarja is always the sound to my greatest moments. :)

This can play at the beginning:

...and this can play at the end:

[Mabinogia]

21 hours ago, Danielg342 said:

This can play at the beginning:

I like it. If you're ever looking for a job and I ever win the lottery, I'd love to hire you to score my daily life. Wish I Had an Angel would be the perfect wake up in the morning and get pumped before the big heist motivational music. :)

[andromeda331]

Reminds me in the Emperor's New Groove Kronk humming is own theme music as he carried off Kuzco to get rid of him and Kuzco saying how happy he was to be unconscious at the time. 

[Blergh]

1 hour ago, andromeda331 said:

Reminds me in the Emperor's New Groove Kronk humming is own theme music as he carried off Kuzco to get rid of him and Kuzco saying how happy he was to be unconscious at the time. 

Even factoring in the show being a cartoon, I think it would be a safe bet that virtually NOTHING depicted on The Emperor's New Groove remotely resembled reality! LOL

[Shannon L.]

I've never worked at a fancy, high paying job in a large building, but can someone tell me if it's common for the boss, or someone else high on the ladder, to come down to the lobby to greet you on your first day?

[Lugal]

On 8/22/2022 at 8:33 PM, possibilities said:

Heists on TV are always accompanied by jaunty music.

So?  Next thing you're going to tell me your getaway music isn't a fast banjo track.

[Mabinogia]

3 hours ago, Shannon L. said:

I've never worked at a fancy, high paying job in a large building, but can someone tell me if it's common for the boss, or someone else high on the ladder, to come down to the lobby to greet you on your first day?

I've been an administrative assistant in many a large building in various industries and not once have I seen that happen. I think one boss had me, his assistant, go down and fetch the new employee but usually they are shown up by HR whom they visit with first to get their paperwork out of the way and get their badge photo taken.

Usually my boss would schedule some one on one time with the new hire after their HR meeting but the newbie would have to find their way to bosses office. 

At my current office the Big Wigs don't even use the same lobby as us peons (and by peons I mean VPs and below).

[DoctorAtomic]

All of the bosses have come down to give me the key to the executive bathroom and introduce me to my girl.

[Danielg342]

9 hours ago, Shannon L. said:

I've never worked at a fancy, high paying job in a large building, but can someone tell me if it's common for the boss, or someone else high on the ladder, to come down to the lobby to greet you on your first day?

I think it depends on the person. I worked as a janitor at a window factory where both the production unit and the corporate unit were on the same complex. The first President I worked for never stepped out of his office. The second one didn't directly introduce himself to me but he was a bit more affable.

One VP- who later became part-owner after a restructuring- actually did come to me on his first day and introduce himself, but that's just who he was. He was more of a "hands on" kind of guy so he made it a point to be approachable and known to everyone in the company. Other managers and VPs were a mixture of "hands on" and "hands off", including those that worked in production. Some you hardly ever saw, while others you saw all the time.

Now, I didn't work at a Fortune 500 company, so who knows if my experience would be different if I was working at Fiat or Nintendo. I highly doubt, even if their CEOs were personable guys who are very "hands on", that on my first day there I'd be shaking their hand and they'd seek me out to introduce themselves.

...but, you never know. I'm sure there are some CEOs that will actually try to get to know all of their employees, at least as best as they can. Others may just want to be in their office and let others handle the smaller issues. Depends on the person.

[JustHereForFood]

On 8/26/2022 at 9:25 PM, Shannon L. said:

I've never worked at a fancy, high paying job in a large building, but can someone tell me if it's common for the boss, or someone else high on the ladder, to come down to the lobby to greet you on your first day?

I know from TV that it is common to bumb into your single, attractive boss and spill coffee all over them on your first day, before you are introduced. Or, to have an angry argument with them on your way to your new place of work, sometimes because they almost hit you with their car.

[Hiyo]

You will also experience some form of verbal diarrhea before being properly introduced to them.

[Anduin]

This is a tricky one. But whenever I see Native Americans in TV or movies, they always have a slightly stilted way of speaking. Maybe a little slow, with an odd rhythm. I'm not claiming to have a vast knowledge of appearances or anything, it's just common to what I have seen.

Yet, I recently watched an interview with the Prey cast, and just listened to an interview with a Native American musician. In unsurprising news, they had both pace and rhythm common to people who speak English as a first language the world over.

I wonder. Was the first Native American actor uncomfortable, and subsequent actors followed their lead? Are they all told to put it on?

[Zella]

1 hour ago, Anduin said:

they had both pace and rhythm common to people who speak English as a first language the world over.

Just an FYI, but not all Native American actors are actually speaking English as their first language. Wes Studi didn't learn it until he was 5, and there is a distinctive dialect of English called American Indian English (or "Rez English") that is noted for its melodious and deliberate intonations. It's been noted as occurring even in folks who never spoke their native language, and it's believed it may have been reinforced in those really awful boarding/residential schools that many Native people were shipped off to for decades. 

Not saying that there's not exaggeration in how Native American characters talk in some movies, but I've seen people complain about Adam Beach as being stilted when he talks, but it is legitimately how he talks. And from what I have heard and read, it's not at all unusual for other Indigenous Canadians to have a similar manner of speaking. (And one of the biggest exceptions I can think of is Eric Schweig, who has been very vocal about the trauma he experienced in being forcibly removed from his mom and adopted by abusive white parents who never raised him in his culture.) I've actually been watching a 90s show called North of 60, about a Dene town in the Northwest Territories, that has a cast that's mostly First Nations (including a very young Adam Beach), not all of whom are even actors, and a lot of them do have a distinctive cadence and manner of speaking. 

So, I would be reluctant to conclude that every single Native American or First Nations actor is exaggerating the way they speak, especially since, as with a lot of dialects, there's a complicated cultural and historical legacy that goes along with it. 

https://inthesetimes.com/article/talk-on-the-rez-english-prosody-and-the-native-american-accent

This article talks a bit about the accent and also why some people lose the accent or code switch away from it when they're speaking with people who aren't from their same background because they don't want to be stereotyped. 

Edited September 3, 2022 by Zella

[possibilities]

Reservation Dogs has a mostly Native cast and writing staff, and I've seen some of them do interviews and they sound like they sound-- I don't think the show is exaggerating or faking it. 

There have been some BS things done in representation of indigenous people, though, for sure. I think that authenticity is getting more of a chance these days, but historically, representation has been truly abysmal.

[Lugal]

American Indian English hasn't really been studied all that well until recently, but from what I've read, a slower speech pattern is a feature of the language, which some people (Native and non-Native) attribute to being more deliberate in the words they speak.

1 hour ago, Zella said:

It's been noted as occurring even in folks who never spoke their native language, and it's believed it may have been reinforced in those really awful boarding/residential schools that many Native people were shipped off to for decades.

I've heard that theory as well, and it was reinforced during the Termination policies of the Fifties when many Native people moved to the cities and settled with other Natives who may have been from different nations.

But there is good news, Native nations are working to revitalize their languages.  The Navajo have produced dubs of Star Wars and Finding Nemo in Navajo.

[Anduin]

Thanks! Yes, I get it. Partly fact, partly fiction.

[Fool to cry]

My first exposure to Native Americans was Spirit from the GI JOE cartoon. Besides thinking that all indigenous people have pet eagles the show gave my childhood self the false impression of the extensive military use of hang gliding in combat!

[theredhead77]

2 hours ago, Fool to cry said:

Besides thinking that all indigenous people have pet eagles the show gave my childhood self the false impression of the extensive military use of hang gliding in combat!

Same!

I also had to overcome the reality of how little quicksand I would encounter (variety of sources) and realize that cars don't instantly explode when they are hit (thanks, CHiPs).

[Fool to cry]

1 hour ago, theredhead77 said:

Same!

I also had to overcome the reality of how little quicksand I would encounter (variety of sources) and realize that cars don't instantly explode when they are hit (thanks, CHiPs).

According to CHiPs, motorcycle cops DO hangglide on their time off as well as go disco dancing and various water sports!

[DoctorAtomic]

Why was quicksand such a thing in the 70s? Is there an equivalent now?

[Trini]

3 hours ago, theredhead77 said:

and realize that cars don't instantly explode when they are hit (thanks, CHiPs).

I don't know about CHiPs, but I've been annoyed by this enough times on shows/movies in the past few decades. Like, is the entire car made of jet fuel?? LOL

[meep.meep]

1 hour ago, DoctorAtomic said:

Why was quicksand such a thing in the 70s? Is there an equivalent now?

It wasn't really in the 70s, it was earlier in the 60s when there were lots of Westerns.  Quicksand is the hazard you can't see coming.  Just as our heroes had escaped the Injuns and the cattle stampede and the flash flood, they were always wandering into quicksand.

[DoctorAtomic]

Still though. There's not really quicksand in the West either. 

Actually, quicksand was a major plot point in Prey.

Edited September 16, 2022 by DoctorAtomic

[DrSpaceman73]

[janie jones]

Yeah, I was going to say, I feel like it was in every cartoon I ever saw when I was a kid.

[Browncoat]

And we can't forget the lightning sand in the fire swamp in "The Princess Bride".

[DoctorAtomic]

Who has breakfast in bed? And those trays. I've never seen them in any store.

[Mabinogia]

19 minutes ago, DoctorAtomic said:

Who has breakfast in bed?

If you count being so lazy that I leave a snack by my bed to eat in the morning because I don't want to get up on weekends breakfast in bed, then I do.

If you mean a gourmet omelet, side of bacon, with a glass of fresh squeezed OJ two buttered toast triangles and a single flower in a small glass vase, then I can't say that has ever happened, or that I'd want it to. I don't think I'd enjoy eating a full meal like that in bed to be honest. 

[DoctorAtomic]

Of course the flower. I totally forgot. 

[Domestic Assassin]

1 hour ago, DoctorAtomic said:

Who has breakfast in bed? And those trays. I've never seen them in any store.

Must be a generational thing. My parents had a pair of them. I always associated them with being sick, because that's when they were used in my childhood. Surprised to see they're still making them. https://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/store/s/breakfast-in-bed-tray

Edited September 18, 2022 by Domestic Assassin

[Shannon L.]

I had them, but only used them a few times.  Breakfast in bed isn't all it's cracked up to be, imo.

[DoctorAtomic]

Who is buying them? 

[Bastet]

35 minutes ago, Domestic Assassin said:

I always associated them with being sick, because that's when they were used in my childhood.

Same here.

[paulvdb]

I'm not American, so maybe it's more common than I think. But I recently watched several shows and movies that make it seem like every American high school has at least one British student. Either an exchange student or someone whose family moved to the US.

[Anduin]

In the movie 3,000 years of Longing, Alithea has a two-story house with basement. She lives on her own. There's no need for such a large place if it's just you. I speak from experience. Not only is there no need, you have to keep it all clean! Smaller is far better. Bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, lounge room, storeroom. Much easier.

[meep.meep]

22 hours ago, DoctorAtomic said:

Who has breakfast in bed? And those trays. I've never seen them in any store.

My kids used to serve me breakfast in bed on Mother's Day.  It was terrifying because their ideas of how to cook were primitive at best.

I don't think there's a lot of breakfasting in bed on TV.  There was at least one Top Chef quickfire that involved serving breakfast in bed to Padma L. and Nigella Lawson.

[Hiyo]

Quote

My kids used to serve me breakfast in bed on Mother's Day.  It was terrifying because their ideas of how to cook were primitive at best.

My siblings and I did that for my mom one year for Mother's Day. Two of us in middle school, the other in elementary school. My mom was a great mom because she smiled and said how yummy it all was so grateful etc etc, but in hindsight, I am sure she was thinking "I love you guys for this, but please don't do it again till you are all a bit older and know what you are doing".

[Cinnabon]

39 minutes ago, meep.meep said:

My kids used to serve me breakfast in bed on Mother's Day.  It was terrifying because their ideas of how to cook were primitive at best.

I don't think there's a lot of breakfasting in bed on TV.  There was at least one Top Chef quickfire that involved serving breakfast in bed to Padma L. and Nigella Lawson.

My brother and I used to make my parents breakfast in bed from time to time when we were kids. I’m sure the actual food wasn’t great, but they pretended to be thrilled. 🙂

[DoctorAtomic]

I would totally serve breakfast in bed to Nigella. With the flower. 

[janie jones]

I've gotten my cereal and gotten back into bed to eat it. If it were something I cooked, it would be too much effort to get situated in bed again, but if someone made it for me, I'd happily eat it in bed.

[GaT]

I don't understand how anybody can wake up & immediately eat breakfast. Without even getting out of bed. Don't these people have to pee? Are they actually so hungry when they first wake up that they can eat a meal? It takes me two cups of coffee before I even get to the point where I can eat.

[DoctorAtomic]

Not to mention they're always decent so people can just walk in with the food.

[Zella]

1 hour ago, GaT said:

I don't understand how anybody can wake up & immediately eat breakfast. Without even getting out of bed. Don't these people have to pee? Are they actually so hungry when they first wake up that they can eat a meal? It takes me two cups of coffee before I even get to the point where I can eat.

I do! My brother has to wait for hours though. I'm not a coffee drinker and have always been able to eat as soon as I wake up, even when I was a kid. 

Edited September 19, 2022 by Zella

[Bastet]

If someone shoved food under my nose right when I woke up, I would be so nauseated I'd probably puke all over their nicely-arranged breakfast tray.

[meep.meep]

But then you'd knock over the bud vase with the carefully chosen flower and dampen your sheets!  TV breakfast in bed is very ritsy.

Having been a recipient of this, they do wait until you have done whatever you must do before dining.  

[Bastet]

11 minutes ago, meep.meep said:

Having been a recipient of this, they do wait until you have done whatever you must do before dining.  

What I must do before dining is be up for a couple of hours, so no way I'd be getting back into bed to eat on a tray while trying to keep the pillows arranged comfortably to sit up and keeping my cat's face out of my plate until I was ready to share.

[Cloud9Shopper]

7 hours ago, GaT said:

I don't understand how anybody can wake up & immediately eat breakfast. Without even getting out of bed. Don't these people have to pee? Are they actually so hungry when they first wake up that they can eat a meal? It takes me two cups of coffee before I even get to the point where I can eat.

I do usually have to use the bathroom when I get up, but I’m the weirdo who works full time from home but still likes to get up early to have breakfast and coffee. (Off topic but I never understood people who can just roll out of bed and go to work at home because the transition is too fast for me.) 

I am sometimes hungry enough to want to get breakfast right after I feed the cat but sometimes I take a shower after feeding her and then eat my own breakfast. 

[Cobalt Stargazer]

On 8/23/2022 at 6:26 PM, Danielg342 said:

Sounds good. Tarja is always the sound to my greatest moments. :)

This can play at the beginning:

Wildly off-topic: Nightwish was never the same after Tarja left.

On 9/3/2022 at 7:27 AM, Anduin said:

This is a tricky one. But whenever I see Native Americans in TV or movies, they always have a slightly stilted way of speaking. Maybe a little slow, with an odd rhythm. I'm not claiming to have a vast knowledge of appearances or anything, it's just common to what I have seen.

Craig Johnson, who writes the Longmire books, also incorporates this into his work with the character of Henry Standing Bear, which was carried over into the TV show. Henry is Cheyenne, and he doesn't use contractions and speaks relatively slowly in comparison to his white counterparts, which is something Johnson has experienced in real life.