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S09.E02: Groomzilla


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(edited)
14 minutes ago, MrsPatrickBateman said:

However then I also think if they had modeled healthy relationships to her and she had a healthy relationship with both parents maybe FT wouldn't have been a factor. 

Well, at one point Mykelti DID say she was marrying her father. Both Kody and Tony are obnoxious, egomaniacs, paternalistic, determined to have things their way (whether that actually happens is to be seen), and have no regard for the feelings of the women who love them.

23 minutes ago, Punkadoo said:

I also think Cody HATES FT. If you watch closesly, especially in the cake shop, the wives run interference.

Two little men, competing for top dog over cake. Kody's mocha and FT's tres leches. They both got what they wanted but they were both being such little dicks about it.

ETA: The online People article from last January said an estimated 400 people attended. So, did they NOT send out RSVPs and not know how many people attended their own wedding? Did the venue not do a headcount? I'm calling bullshit; they just want a "party" number out there in the media.

Edited by Galloway Cave
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It’s weird to bring the groom along to look at wedding dresses. It is not weird to share your husband with three other women. 

They control what the girls wear while they are living at home. Their standards include coverage to the wrist. Their daughters wear tank tops. 

My head hurts. Am just starting to watch this episode and I am already going insane. 

Tony is a creep. 

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1 minute ago, Galloway Cave said:

Well, at one point Mykelti DID say she was marrying her father. Both Kody and Tony are obnoxious, egomaniacs, paternalistic, determined to have things their way (whether that actually happens is to be seen), and have no regard for the feelings of the women who love them.

Two little men, competing for top dog over cake. Kody's mocha and FT's tres leches. They both got what they wanted but they were both being such little dicks about it.

The way Kodouche was talking about the cake sounded to me about someone having great sex. Just his breathing.

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4 hours ago, cereality said:

Damn the truth comes out as Meri directly says -- they have kids at home, I don't, and I am not going into THEIR homes to raise THEIR kids, that's not happening.

So what happened to the sister wives BS of -- EACH of the kids is MY kid, there's no difference between my kids and the others' kids. Sounds like there is a difference . . .

SOOOO much this! ^ ^ ^ ^

They've said over and over again how having all these moms help raise their kids is a perk of "the lifestyle"...and then, just when I kind of want to be happy that Meri has perhaps found something that will make her happy, she says this! A totally selfish attitude, IMO. It's pretty much "I'm not helping you raise your kids, but please sink family money into a really shaky business idea for me, because, you know, I am poor poor victim Meri." I want to like her, I really do, but I just can't. She keeps coming up with these stupid, selfish things! Arghhh!

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3 hours ago, Christi said:

Articles about the wedding say there were over 400 people...I now DESPERATELY need to know if they ran out of food...burp

Christine tweeted out yes - they did run out. Along with the gratuitous compliment to the douchy son in law - they did 4 tacos per person when he said 10 and they should’ve listened to him.

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2 hours ago, Desert Rat said:

FT was so obnoxious at the dress shop, commenting on the dresses and her hair style.  After the wedding, will she have to get his approval on her clothes, hair and makeup?

UGH. I don't have near the distaste for him that many others do, but I'm sorry, Tony did not need to be there. Not his concern not his business how Mykelti wears her hair, or what kind of dress she picks. That is overstepping your bounds, and it has nothing to do with "bad luck". It has to do with it not being your business how the bride chooses to dress. Did I hear someone say CONTROL FREAK?

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35 minutes ago, Sasha888 said:

SOOOO much this! ^ ^ ^ ^

They've said over and over again how having all these moms help raise their kids is a perk of "the lifestyle"...and then, just when I kind of want to be happy that Meri has perhaps found something that will make her happy, she says this! A totally selfish attitude, IMO. It's pretty much "I'm not helping you raise your kids, but please sink family money into a really shaky business idea for me, because, you know, I am poor poor victim Meri." I want to like her, I really do, but I just can't. She keeps coming up with these stupid, selfish things! Arghhh!

To be fair to Meri, there was more to her statement about not going over to help with the other children than just "I'm not doing that". I don't think she meant it in that way. She said she didn't want to overstep her bounds, and that they all raised all the kids in the beginning but that it isn't that way anymore. She also said the kids do come over to her house occasionally, but that the other wives don't need her to help take care of them. It doesn't sound like it's a case of say, Christine asking Meri to watch Truely and Meri just turning her down. Meri feels the other families don't need her anymore.

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4 hours ago, SuzyLee said:

Holy shit, this dance.  I usually find her to be a bit of a sad sack Eeyore type of person, but I’m with Janelle.  There’s no way on God’s green earth I’d participate in that, regardless of whether or not I had a properly-fitting costume (because wow, do they not fit a single one of them).

I would totally get up and do that dance, costume and all. While I admit (as did the wives) that the clothes were ill-fitting, they were still hilariously fabulous and I would've rocked the heck out of that whole shebang. Nothing wrong with having a bit of corny fun every once in a while.

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1 hour ago, Punkadoo said:

 

The things that surprised me- Janelle being the one to stick up Mykelti about the cake and then Meri coming in for the tag team. Lord I dislike everything about Toni. I have the sneaky suspicion there is an agreement to let Jenelle, Meri and Robyn do the dirty work in trying to check Toni when he is an unadulterated ass. It keeps peace between Mykelti and Christine and allows things that cannot be ignored to be addressed. Except Robyn probably has ulterior motives and needs to be the favorite HBIC. I wonder if Robyn is thinking she needs a new cookie tossing speech or whatever the heck it was cause Mykelti is sure giving away her purity for an ass. I also think Cody HATES FT. If you watch closesly, especially in the cake shop, the wives run interference. Some of Cody's body language is fairly hostile and rightly so. 

You're right. Kody acts very differently around Caleb, the favorite SIL.  I hate saying this, but FT makes Kody look good.  

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5 hours ago, Cherrio said:

There is nothing about FT that is likable.  I even find it difficult to look at him.

Back when I was a kid we had an expression for guys like FT:

Ten pounds of shit in a five pound bag.

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I ? FT. I hope Kody gets his planet and FT is on it for eternity.

Mykelti could do so much better but she’s in the bottom barrel kid batch and doesn’t realize it. She grew up without her father’s attention and love. 

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3 hours ago, Ravenna said:

Also, when they flashed a picture of Meri a few years ago, I had forgotten how normal she use to look. Back in the day when she wasn’t orange with sharpie eyebrows.

I went back and checked some Season 1 photos and they all looked more happy and normal before Sobyn.  Really the douchbag should have stuck to the original 3.

What's happened to the kids??  None of the kids are interviewed anymore except for Mykelti, Meriah and Madison.  Truley and Solomon were on for 10 seconds.  But the other kids? Sobyn's before Koduche kids?

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The online People article from last January said an estimated 400 people attended. So, did they NOT send out RSVPs and not know how many people attended their own wedding? Did the venue not do a headcount? I'm calling bullshit; they just want a "party" number out there in the media.

I doubt they even sent a reporter much less one that can count to 400. The venue probably threw up their hands at this circus and hid somewhere during the gross proceedings.  I agree, it's a BS number provided by the family. 

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10 hours ago, Chicklet said:

Ok I can't help it. How is that song appropriate for a wedding shower? Anyone?

LOL, why did I not even think about that??? You're so right. Another passive aggressive message from Christine?

 

10 hours ago, Galloway Cave said:

I'm all for Christine going out of her comfort zone and singing a song for Mykelti. But that teacher is doing her no favors by letting her sing in a key that is WAY too high for her.

YES. WAY too high. And she was very flat as well. I can't sing for shit, but I come from a family of singers, so I know bad when I hear it. And that was bad. 

 

10 hours ago, WhatsUpDummy said:

Thank you Janelle for being the voice of reason! Chips and dip, 3 full size tacos, and a bunch of desserts is PLENTY! Tony, of course, is only concerned with stuffing his fat face. Janelle was spot on. You’re still hungry after all that? Hit up McDonalds on the way home. 

Right? It's a wedding, not Thanksgiving dinner. You don't come to stuff yourself. 

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6 hours ago, Gothish520 said:

I would totally get up and do that dance, costume and all. While I admit (as did the wives) that the clothes were ill-fitting, they were still hilariously fabulous and I would've rocked the heck out of that whole shebang. Nothing wrong with having a bit of corny fun every once in a while.

It's the kind of thing I wish I could do.  I think it's hilarious, and while their kids roll their eyes and laugh at them, they also seem to get a kick out of it and join in.  

I can be hard on Janelle, but doing something this difficult for Mykelti is a very sweet gesture.  She defended Mykelti over and over this episode, and it would be easy for her to sit back and just thank God that other than camouflage, Maddie runs the show in her marriage.

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6 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

LOL, why did I not even think about that??? You're so right. Another passive aggressive message from Christine?

 

YES. WAY too high. And she was very flat as well. I can't sing for shit, but I come from a family of singers, so I know bad when I hear it. And that was bad. 

 

Right? It's a wedding, not Thanksgiving dinner. You don't come to stuff yourself. 

Every meal is Thanksgiving if you just glance at FT.

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5 hours ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I cannot imagine what she sees in FT. 

He was the first guy to pay attention to her, I imagine. We've seen that Kody didn't pay as much attention to his girls growing up; other than Mariah, he tended to favor the boys. And, we also know from Christine's gym mat discussion, that HER kids were especially overlooked (she only had one son). So I think with Mykelti it's probably a combination of missing out on a father much of the time and also just having that sort of insecure personality. She absolutely sought out the love of Kody via Tony; they're so much alike. And I think she was just jumping at the chance to lock someone down, AND get some attention from her family. 

 

41 minutes ago, greekmom said:

went back and checked some Season 1 photos and they all looked more happy and normal before Sobyn.  Really the douchbag should have stuck to the original 3.

I agree. It wasn't just adding a fourth, but waiting SO long to do it. Meri, Jenelle, and Christine were all added within years of each other. Boom, boom, boom. They had their oldest 3 kids all around the same time. Then they were like that for YEARS. Bringing Robyn in, what? Fifteeen years later? Horrible idea. It totally fucked up the dynamic and left a lot of confused, hurt feelings in the wake. I also think that multi-function house was the best thing that ever happened to them, as a family. They were together so much more often. Robyn's addition would have necessitated a separation, even without the moves. She's NEVER lived with them in that way. 

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19 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

So I think with Mykelti it's probably a combination of missing out on a father much of the time and also just having that sort of insecure personality. She absolutely sought out the love of Kody via Tony; they're so much alike. And I think she was just jumping at the chance to lock someone down, AND get some attention from her family. 

Good analysis.  Too bad FT was the first one who showed up.  What a loser.

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Plural marriage set the daughters up for relationship failures unless they somehow come out of their family with some self-respect, are self-motivated, and clearly see what a losing proposition plural marriage is for woman. I can see Mykelti either accepting sister wives or getting a divorce in the next 10 years. Or then there's her just being miserable in her marriage and staying because that's been her model. Really sad for those girls.

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Mykelti could do so much better but she’s in the bottom barrel kid batch and doesn’t realize it. She grew up without her father’s attention and love. 

Mykelti is Christine, who also could have done much better for herself and doesn't realize it. And Tony is Kody. Its all really rather sad. I think Mykelti was also jealous of Madison, who seems to be a favored child among all the parents because she married someone they already knew and liked. In reality, both Madison and Mykelti are college dropouts with no job skills getting married young and likely depending on reality television to keep their finances healthy.

Janelle seems incredibly checked out of the entire situation, almost like she's in a coma when she has to be with the other wives.

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In Meri's talking head she said Christine never comes to her house and she never goes to Christine's. We already know Meri and Janelle don't get along and Robyn has become besties with Christine. We also know she and Kody are just tolerating each other and Mariah, her only child, can barely stand being in the same room with her.  The result of all that is a very lonely existence for Meri, whether she brought most of that on herself or not.  I would run for Utah as well! 

53 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I wonder if SHE went and picked out his tux???

What TUX? Tony wore dirty jeans and a jacket that didn't fit. But that was ok with Mykelti because Tony is so edgy . That and she wouldn't dare contradict him. So Tony was right about needing 10 taco's per person? Praise Lord Tony, he is such a genius!
 

Edited by bichonblitz
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What was unsaid was that no formalwear shop had a tux anywhere near the size FT needed. So therefore the need for the dirty jeans and jacket. Tre' edgy by necessity.

Ok I almost feel bad about fat-shaming him but dear dog does the boy not own a mirror? Does he not watch the show and realize his issue? And then there's the fact that men lose weight faster and easier than women (grumble).

Edited by Chicklet
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My thoughts (in no particular order):

  • The country club is 3.4 miles from the nearest Burger King.  I agree with Janelle.  Go buy yourself a Whopper if you're still hungry after 3-4 tacos.
  • The country club is "members only."  Who belongs to the CC so they could have their wedding there?  Their standards are obviously low.
  • I suspect that after Kody sees that Tony made fun of his hair, FT will NEVER "go there" again on camera.
  • @ghoulina:  Janelle WAS wearing a shirt under the "costume."  And I don't blame her.  There would have been major boobage showing otherwise.
  • Smashing cake into the face of your new bride/groom as one of your first moments together is NEVER funny.  JMO.
  • I don't think this "marriage" is going to last.  
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11 hours ago, mscav said:

I'm sure the main reason the wives are cool with letting Meri have this is so they don't have to deal with her at the cult de sac.

I thought it was amusing (and alarming) how they were all afraid she was plotting an escape.  

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9 hours ago, MrsPatrickBateman said:

This. This is all I could see. I would not be surprised if they had an affair.

Much as I dislike Robyn, I don't think lust is what predicates her flirting with Tony.  Robyn wants to be idolized by every member of the family as the great Goddess She-Ra.  She feels her tawdry flirting with Tony is a means to establish rapport with him.

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9 hours ago, camom said:

The thing FT likes the most about Mykelti is her selflessness?  In other words, he's a control freak.  

I think Mariah looks a lot like Meri's sister Elaine.

Yes!  Spare me that type of "worship".

Is Elaine the tall sister?  I did a double take because I thought it was Mariah at first.

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42 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

What TUX? Tony wore dirty jeans and a jacket that didn't fit. But that was ok with Mykelti because Tony is so edgy . That and she wouldn't dare contradict him. So Tony was right about needing 10 taco's per person? Praise Lord Tony, he is such a genius!

You're right! I forgot about that atrocity. But yea, I'm sure he didn't even consult her on HIS outfit of choice. 

 

13 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

ghoulina:  Janelle WAS wearing a shirt under the "costume."  And I don't blame her.  There would have been major boobage showing otherwise.

No, she wasn't. She was saying she was going to NEED to put a shirt underneath, for the actual performance. I saw no cleavage, so I wasn't sure why. 

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4 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

You're right! I forgot about that atrocity. But yea, I'm sure he didn't even consult her on HIS outfit of choice. 

 

No, she wasn't. She was saying she was going to NEED to put a shirt underneath, for the actual performance. I saw no cleavage, so I wasn't sure why. 

They're repeating it on Thursday.  I'll DVR it; now I'm curious!

ETA:  Mr. AZC agrees with you.

Edited by AZChristian
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12 hours ago, peaceknit said:

FT (I like it) shoves Mykelti and says I'm sitting here *rolls eyes* 

Wait, what??  Imma need more details.

 

2 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Also, his repeated "It's a white people thing" is getting on my nerves. Does he think he's above everyone else because he's from a different culture and the Brown's are low life because they are common "white people" that don't understand what street taco's are? I can't stand his pompous ass. Yeah, I know, the Browns really are low life but it's not because they are white, Tony!   

LOLOZ - all you have to do in this paragraph is flip "FT" for "Kody" and flip "white people" for "polygamists" and there you have it.  FT = Kody.  Not only that, but FT is out-Kodying Kody himself.  He's even got the dirty clothes and stupid hair thing down to a science.

That said, @LilWharveyGal, I believe, took one for the team last episode and created an amazing recap for those of us (ME) who can't watch.  And while I do understand the sacrifice of both time and brain cells that it takes to describe this circus-freak trainwreck, I am going to need someone to crank up the snark machine and give me my 4000 tacos recap!

Edited by laurakaye
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3 hours ago, CofCinci said:

I ? FT. I hope Kody gets his planet and FT is on it for eternity.

Mykelti could do so much better but she’s in the bottom barrel kid batch and doesn’t realize it. She grew up without her father’s attention and love. 

Oh I think Christine's children are fully aware they are Kody's least favorites.  Paedon was probably luckier because he was usually at Janelle's house, and inadvertently received attention while with his athletic brothers.

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I cannot stand Tony!! I wish FT would quit ascribing his wishes and desires to his being Mexican. As a Mexican-American, I'm offended by FT. Between the Trump comments about Mexicans, and now Tony, we just don't need this...

I do believe Mykelti is right when she says she married her father. Tony is a total attention-seeking famewhore. He's selfish and entitled and he thinks he's the funniest, most clever guy in the room.  If my daughter ever brought some guy like that home, I'd join the Peace Corp. and move away, so that I'd conveniently have to be away at holidays, and not have to see my daughter with him. 

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1 minute ago, zenme said:

If my daughter ever brought some guy like that home, I'd join the Peace Corp. and move away, so that I'd conveniently have to be away at holidays, and not have to see my daughter with him. 

Better yet, sign your daughter up for the Peace Corps to get her away from him.

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1 hour ago, Chicklet said:

Plural marriage set the daughters up for relationship failures unless they somehow come out of their family with some self-respect, are self-motivated, and clearly see what a losing proposition plural marriage is for woman. I can see Mykelti either accepting sister wives or getting a divorce in the next 10 years. Or then there's her just being miserable in her marriage and staying because that's been her model. Really sad for those girls.

Where in the world could Tony land a second wife?  I wish the Brown parents would stop indulging this fool.

35 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

My thoughts (in no particular order):

  • The country club is 3.4 miles from the nearest Burger King.  I agree with Janelle.  Go buy yourself a Whopper if you're still hungry after 3-4 tacos.
  • The country club is "members only."  Who belongs to the CC so they could have their wedding there?  Their standards are obviously low.
  • I suspect that after Kody sees that Tony made fun of his hair, FT will NEVER "go there" again on camera.
  • @ghoulina:  Janelle WAS wearing a shirt under the "costume."  And I don't blame her.  There would have been major boobage showing otherwise.
  • Smashing cake into the face of your new bride/groom as one of your first moments together is NEVER funny.  JMO.
  • I don't think this "marriage" is going to last.  

I think the "members only" was waived for the publicity of the show.

I despise the cake smashing, especially when the bride is unwilling.  I would not simper and laugh if this happened to me, and I'm sure wedding photos would capture me scowling with a threatening look on my face.  Even the basest moron must realize the amount of time and effort that goes into a woman's hair/makeup on their wedding day, and while he just laughs and wipes his face off with a napkin, the bride is left looking like she rolled out of the gutter for the rest of the night - with pictures to memorialize it.

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8 hours ago, cereality said:

Christine tweeted out yes - they did run out. Along with the gratuitous compliment to the douchy son in law - they did 4 tacos per person when he said 10 and they should’ve listened to him.

But did does "they ran out" mean some folks didn't get any food even though everyone took 3 or 4 ? Or does it mean some folks didn't get to gorge themselves on 10 tacos? Or does it mean the first two hundred people took 20 and then the rest didn't get any? Because those are different scenarios. 

And basically my view is that Mykelti and Tony are a perfect couple. Both are insufferable asses. 

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Is no one watching Seeking Sister Wives (SSW)?  Episode one, and wives number one and two are drawing battle lines.  It was super snark worthy, and I will definitely stick with it.

3 minutes ago, Chicklet said:

I'm sure FT could find a woman just as damaged as his first wife somewhere. I mean who thought Kody could have found a 4th?

Kody is a dreamboat when compared to Tony, IMO.  I would be amazed if Tony could convince another woman he's not a reeking pile of refuse.  But having just watched a whispering effeminate man with three very attractive wives on SSW, I guess nothing would shock me.  I'd take the whisperer and his hostile wives before Tony.

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23 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

I thought it was amusing (and alarming) how they were all afraid she was plotting an escape.  

None of them want another wife to do better than them. If Meri's B&B became a hot destination, the others would try and find a way to sabotage her progress before trying to improve their own lives. Their jealousy is suffocating to watch; I can't imagine living in it. Well, I guess they really don't "live" in it, since they pretend the others don't exist and their marriages are monogamous until the cameras show up. 

Fortunately for me, they all turned out to be crappy people who are hateful and disrespectful to everyone, so I don't have to waste any energy sympathizing for them. Even though all but Janelle and Kody were raised that way, their ignorance has crossed from sad to downright assholish. They sold out for a few bucks so they didn't have to work like the rest of us non-polygamist suckers, and showcased their hypocrisy. The first few seasons, I could hate watch and point and laugh at them, but the show just became too boring and TLC decided to make each episode two hours. WAAAAYY too much of the Browns. This was the first episode I watched since a few of the catfishing ones, and it was literally because I didn't see anything else on. I've since decided to rewatch The Wire so this shouldn't be a recurring problem for a few episodes.

4 minutes ago, RedheadZombie said:

Where in the world could Tony land a second wife?  

If the cameras are still following them, it won't be hard. It will probably be a wife just like Tony will be a husband, so he'll deserve her. Unfortunately, I'm sure that if she has anything over Mykelti, like being thinner or having more social media followers, both Tony and the new wife will lord it over her. He's vile and a wife who is attracted to the cameras, like Robyn, will be every bit as nasty.

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