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Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage


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I finally saw one of the marionette commercials on television tonight. So creepy, and I don't even remember what they were advertising.

 

DirecTV, and during a recent visit to my parents' house I learned that my mother has a nearly violent reaction to those commercials.  I'm usually the one ranting while she humors me, so it was a switch (I think the commercials are dumb, too - and in the case of the wife doing a striptease, gross - but I don't get particularly riled up over them).

DirecTV, and during a recent visit to my parents' house I learned that my mother has a nearly violent reaction to those commercials.  I'm usually the one ranting while she humors me, so it was a switch (I think the commercials are dumb, too - and in the case of the wife doing a striptease, gross - but I don't get particularly riled up over them).

The one with the marionette lady always flummoxes me, because I wonder how the hell she takes her robe off with those 'wires' protruding from her shoulders.

 

This commercial & the song are getting on my last nerve. MAKE IT STOP

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmTpgSMJ96c

The commercial is kind of cute, but the 'song', and I'm using that word loosely, is legit terrible.

Am I late with this?

 

The mom looks ridiculous, but I'm so happy to see Vanilla Ice doing well, and not taking himself too seriously.  I think he went through some rough times, so I'm happy to see him get a little of that sweet Kraft Mac n' Cheese money.  I also like that they didn't feature some snotty, entitled child intended to be "precocious" 

THIS. When did reciting words in a flat, timid monotone become confused for singing?

I tried to watch the commercial, but only made it 5 seconds in because I knew that song wasn't going to work for me.

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Direct Insurance commercials are preposterous in general, but I just can't hate on "JJ Hightail" because the actor was hilarious on the late, great Reno 911.

Oh, I wondered why I recognized him!

I noticed the ad campaign for some TV football package is back which features fans with douchey super powers is back.

It doesn't help that I hate how everyone now makes those poses Henry Cavil made as Superman, but these guys are such dickwads.

This commercial & the song are getting on my last nerve. MAKE IT STOP

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmTpgSMJ96c

All this commercial did for me, Apple, is reassure me (once again) that I made the right choice on proactively having my tubes tied at age 29 and never having any kids. Jesus, the anxiety that commercial gave me!

I liked the dog, though.

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THIS. When did reciting words in a flat, timid monotone become confused for singing?

Since that Truvia/ Belvita bitch came on the scene voicing like 100 commercials so far. I'd rater watch strudel boy for 10 hrs straight.

And that stupid commercial makes it look like we can't do anything-including brush our teeth-without one of those phuking phones!

Edited by xls
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I would like the manufacturers of Charmin to know that I went to the supermarket yesterday to buy toilet paper. I picked up a package of Charmin on the shelf, spied one of those fucking bears on the front, put down the package, and bought four rolls of Cottonelle instead.

Fuck you, Charmin Bears.

Have you caught the latest? The youngest boy bears are voyeurs - complete with binoculars trained at the neighbor's bathroom. Of course it's soooo cute, because they're actually staring at the toilet paper. Mama Bear comes in, asks them what they're looking at, and Glasses (ya know, the smart one) replies, "My main squeeze!" So charming. Except not, because Peeping Toms rarely are.

I'm so glad I've always gone with Scott.

Edited by Aquarius
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I would like the manufacturers of Charmin to know that I went to the supermarket yesterday to buy toilet paper. I picked up a package of Charmin on the shelf, spied one of those fucking bears on the front, put down the package, and bought four rolls of Cottonelle instead.

 

Fuck you, Charmin Bears.

Isn't Cottonelle the brand that uses The Sparkle Fairy as their spokes...elf, whatever? I hate her almost as much as the Charmin Bears, with her weird obsession about how much people spend on toilet paper.

Isn't Cottonelle the brand that uses The Sparkle Fairy as their spokes...elf, whatever? I hate her almost as much as the Charmin Bears, with her weird obsession about how much people spend on toilet paper.

I thought the Sparkle Fairy was for paper towels - Sparkle Paper Towels, I thought. But yes, she's annoying as hell with that little screech when she asks if you really need a paper towel that can hold a bowling ball. I go right past the fact that she has a point - just stop with the "cutesy" screech, already! (Actually, I think they've edited it out now, so I guess I'm not the only one yelling "Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!") 

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The one with the marionette lady always flummoxes me, because I wonder how the hell she takes her robe off with those 'wires' protruding from her shoulders.

 

The commercial is kind of cute, but the 'song', and I'm using that word loosely, is legit terrible.

 

I'm having to watch that commercial with the mute button hit because the signer seems to be the same off-key woman from the Prius for Everyone ads last year.

 

 

Vanilla Ice on HGTV!?!??  Good for him!  I'm glad to hear that, thanks for that!

 

He's actually been flipping homes in South Florida between tours for quite a number of years before the tv show came along. Not like he's got Davie Bowie money or anything, but he's comfortably well off.

Oh, my. That man's haircut is the worst thing about that commercial, and that commercial is pretty damn bad.

I guess they know their client base and aren't afraid to say it. "Is your car parked behind Big Momma's house?" P.S. State Bar of Alabama, no lawyer can help you if you haven't paid your car loan.

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How did it take me so long to find the most entertaining forum on the site??

 

Having said that, I had a whole different take on the Yoplait fridge ad. Mind you, I've only seen the one where the wife is on the phone. I assumed the husband was taking so long staring inside the fridge because he was trying to find actual Boston Cream Pie, etc. And the wife was up in his face in case he might eat any of her precious Yoplait (because we're supposed to believe it's that delicious, that someone would get all territorial about it). So for me, the premise that Yoplait is like a delicious dessert is silly, but I didn't pick up on any terrible vibe between the couple.

 

While I'm confessing, I don't get the Duke ads. I just don't understand what a talking dog has to do with baked beans, and it strikes me as weird every time I see one. Since this is the first year I ever saw that ad campaign, I was especially nonplussed by the ad where they had action figures. Like it was a thing. Now that I know the campaign's been on for 30 years, at least that part of it makes a little more sense.

 

Also confessing: I don't understand the Geico cowboy ad. Can someone kindly explain like I'm 5 (tm Reddit)?

 

I doubt anyone will ever top the "I've got Sam in my pants" ad for sheer cringeworthiness. And I don't know the product name they're hawking, so they failed. On the plus side, I haven't seen ugly American Cadillac owner or moneygrubbing babysitter Chevy Tahoe ads since the Olympics.

Edited by peggy06

While I'm confessing, I don't get the Duke ads. I just don't understand what a talking dog has to do with baked beans, and it strikes me as weird every time I see one. Since this is the first year I ever saw that ad campaign, I was especially nonplussed by the ad where they had action figures. Like it was a thing. Now that I know the campaign's been on for 30 years, at least that part of it makes a little more sense.

I totally agree. This whole campaign makes no sense and is way past it's prime. And it somehow makes me absolutely stabby that they feel the need to say 'roll that beautiful bean footage' in every single commercial. We get it - it's a commercial for baked beans. No one is surprised that there are pictures of said beans in a baked bean commercial, and hence that concept doesn't necessarily need an introduction every. single. fucking. time.

While I'm confessing, I don't get the Duke ads. I just don't understand what a talking dog has to do with baked beans, and it strikes me as weird every time I see one.

The original premise was this: owner of company says something to the effect of "our secret recipe is super awesome and super secret; I haven't told anyone but the dog, and he's not talking". (implied: dogs cannot speak) Cut to: the dog speaks. So the running gag is, the only living being who knows the "secret" besides him is the dog, and the dog, to his surprise, is not only capable of speaking, but wants to give away the family secret. Hence it evolved from there: the dog talks; the human tries to get him not to.

 

The ads that basically amounted to "and he's not talking" (dog starts to talk) were on for what seemed like decades. I want to say the newer ones where the dog is clearly trying to tell, and they assume familiarity with the original premise has only been the last handful of years or so. But I might have my dates wrong.

Edited by theatremouse

 

 

The ads that basically amounted to "and he's not talking" (dog starts to talk) were on for what seemed like decades. I want to say the newer ones where the dog is clearly trying to tell, and they assume familiarity with the original premise has only been the last handful of years or so. But I might have my dates wrong.

Yeah, Duke has turned into a bit of an asshole over the years

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After seeing that gem of a commercial from Alabama upthread, I've been thinking maybe we need a "Local Commercials" thread, in which we regale each other with horrifyingly bad examples of homespun marketing gone wrong.

I can think of at least one series of local auto dealer commercials that fill me with unbridled rage because of how annoyingly stupid they are.

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After seeing that gem of a commercial from Alabama upthread, I've been thinking maybe we need a "Local Commercials" thread, in which we regale each other with horrifyingly bad examples of homespun marketing gone wrong.

I can think of at least one series of local auto dealer commercials that fill me with unbridled rage because of how annoyingly stupid they are.

I like the idea. Make it happen, Capt'n.
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Me too - there's seemingly no end to the annoying local commercials around here in northern Florida. Right now the prime contenders for stabbiness are the local pizzeria that made up its own lyrics to "It's only rock and roll" ("oh no, it's not just cheese and dough...") to the annoying ambulance chaser who mispronounces his own profession as "law-(full stop)-yer"). Apparently he passed the hooked-on-phonics bar exam... 

 

Edited because you guys really need the link for the first one (and apparently it's sauce and dough): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ehs03yTXtIY

Edited by Stella MD
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theatremouse, thanks for explaining the history of the "Duke" ad campaign for Busch's baked beans. Somehow I have missed this until the last 6 months or so. Now it makes sense. I do think it's taking a risk to run that long with an ad campaign that presupposes your audience saw the originals. Maybe this is how younger people feel when they see the Starkist commercial with Charlie the Tuna. Back in the day, Charlie was a household name, and the tagline "Sorry, Charlie," was instantly recognizable. Nowadays, it probably seems completely random.

theatremouse, thanks for explaining the history of the "Duke" ad campaign for Busch's baked beans. Somehow I have missed this until the last 6 months or so. Now it makes sense. I do think it's taking a risk to run that long with an ad campaign that presupposes your audience saw the originals. Maybe this is how younger people feel when they see the Starkist commercial with Charlie the Tuna. Back in the day, Charlie was a household name, and the tagline "Sorry, Charlie," was instantly recognizable. Nowadays, it probably seems completely random.

I had no idea that phrase was linked to charlie the tuna!  Were people saying sorry because charlie got caught and turned into a high sodium canned snack?

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