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Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage


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Key rules:  Stay on topic; go to Small Talk with things not about commercials; be civil; no politics. 

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39 minutes ago, Brattinella said:

Is that another Chevy ad?  I won't even peek.

Yeah, it's the guy who Gumps himself in to mock them. The door he mocks is even stupider than it looks from the screenshot - yes, that's a "door" and not just a wall with a cutout in it.

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1 hour ago, HighMaintenance said:

Am I the only one that thought she was Eileen Brennan?  'Cept Brennan died in 2013.  

You are right!  In her iconic Private Benjamin role.  Maybe we can locate some blue dye and secretly install it in Pretzel Woman's shower.

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11 hours ago, Jamoche said:

"My god, you guys and your doors."

"Good choice on the color.  What's that?  Burnt rust?"

"Makes me think someone's gonna overpay for a piece of shit."  HA!

Mahk is awesome.  Thanks.  I needed that today.

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You guyz.  Those ASPCA and St. Jude ads have me diving for the remote.  Must change the channel or at the very least put it on mute.  Can't handle them. But guess who now is giving a recurring monthly donation to the ASPCA and gave a year-end donation to St. Jude?  Yeah, this girl.  And I work in direct marketing and am hip to their techniques---hell, I USE those techniques when writing copy for my own clients.  But while my head is hip, the heart is not so much.

On ‎3‎/‎27‎/‎2017 at 2:44 PM, peacheslatour said:

"Is that ice cream?" What if it is you little shit? Get your ass back to bed! Jesus those parents are about as wimpy as they come. 

LOL.  So true!   Sadly, many kids today are "the boss" in their households.  I see it with Mr. Duke's sister and her daughter.  An her daughter just turned 6.  Scary stuff. 

On ‎3‎/‎28‎/‎2017 at 7:53 PM, Ryan Chamberlain said:

That Haribo ad where the adults are talking like kids makes me want to jump off a bridge.

Wanna jump together?? AFTER smacking the ad exec who approved that shitty commercial, obviously. I didn't think there could be a commercial that made my skin crawl more than those insipid Panera commercials.  But congrats Haribo, you've done the job. 

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On 3/30/2017 at 1:33 PM, peacheslatour said:

Amazon has a feature where a portion of your order payment goes to the charity of your choice. I chose St. Jude's, since we already give to the local no kill cat shelter. homeless shelter and women's health clinic.

Mine is Vet Ranch.

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6 minutes ago, riley702 said:

Mine is Vet Ranch.

I adore Vet Ranch.  If people don't know what that is, it's a YouTube channel with over a million subscribers, where veterinarians help rescued animals who are in need of medical procedures and help to find them forever homes.  I cannot endorse the channel highly enough.

https://www.youtube.com/user/VetRanch

The guy who runs Vet Ranch also runs Demolition Ranch, where he likes to blow things up and shoot them up with heavy guns (he's from Texas), and another channel called Off The Ranch, where he vlogs his and his family's daily lives.

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And his Dad, also a vet, has a channel called Out On The Ranch with Dr. Lee. He has done a series on signs of cancer in your pets, and also has talks where his uncle Floyd reminisces about the old days.

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20 hours ago, Muffyn said:

So you're hanging around your messy house wearing your short-shorts when your boyfriend calls to say he's on his way over with his mom.  Your choice?  Run around the house hiding things while shaving your legs.  Because the thing you want to do on the fly is shave your legs  Sure it's a razor you can use without lathering up your legs but they would still be wet and sticky.  And if your boyfriend's mother is so damn obsessed with your leg hair, put on some pants, dammit.  Put on some pants!  

Thank you! I hate this ad so much!!!  The cutesy little outfit she puts on is more for a 14 year old girl. How about she puts on a nice dress? Ugh.  Cutesy crap pisses me off. 

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On March 31, 2017 at 0:09 PM, HighMaintenance said:

Eyeglass World keeps running a commercial featuring "Smug Justin".  Just his facial tics, make me wanna smack the glasses from his face.  Those pursed lips and those roaming eyebrows!
Gah! Smug Justin!

I like that ad...and Justin...nothing smug about him.  Better than the one with smug Hayley, who instead of booking a hotel, books a cabin off the grid for half the price...idiot...I'll take a hotel any day.

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We we talked about this Match.com commercial?  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQpyZRcTt3s

The woman featured in it comes across like she legit has brain damage. "My sister! met her... husband! on Match." The pause on "husband" makes it sound like she's trying to remember who it was that her sister met. "And they have a baby!" And then she mouths "that's true" as the host guy says that the sister is living happily ever after, she seriously seems like she has some brain cells missing.

It's not the worst commercial of all time, but for some reason the way she speaks just drives me crazy, and it's currently one of the 5 commercials that Hulu is playing at every commercial break so I've seen it about 37 times and it just gets more and more annoying each time. "My sister! met her... husband!"

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On 3/29/2017 at 6:32 PM, chessiegal said:

Sara McLachlan. I was watching comedian Kathleen Madigan's special "Bothering Jesus" on Netflix yesterday, and she was taking pokes at those ads.

Best stand up show I have seen in a long time! "A Beagel puppy in one hand and a gun in the other". 

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I suspect I don't like scat singing, ok, I'm pretty darn sure I don't like scat. I'm not sure if the Hershey's ad that is back in rotation is scat, but what ever it is, annoys the crap out of me. "sing, sing, baby, baby, I love you, woo-hoo, every little thing-ah, yeah!" that's not the whole thing and it's from memory, but it just annoys m.

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(edited)

Carl's Jr/Hardees is running a brain destroying three minute commercial now. I hope that everyone who had anything to do with that commercial finds themselves being convicted of tax fraud and necrophilia.

In other news, my 18-year boycott of both franchises will continue.

Edited by Sandman87
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I am curious Sandman87:  Why are you boycotting Carl's Jr/Hardees?  I've only gone a couple of times and it has been a long time since I've returned.  The little restaurant close to my home makes better burgers and it's a bit cheaper.

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Since a Super Star with cheese is one of the few fast-food offerings I like, I used to treat myself to it about once a year, but then the blatant sexism of the ads meant I couldn't justify adding even $6+/year to the Carl's Jr. coffers and went cold turkey quite a few years back.  This "oh, we're knocking that shit off" campaign isn't enough to bring me back, even with the loathsome Puzder having retired.  In an alternate universe, I might find that commercial semi-amusing.  In reality, no.

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So, toilet paper bears. 

We'll skip over the part where they're blue and live in a house, because that's not new. Inexplicable, but not new. 

But now gramma bear is apparently just hanging out in the bathroom while junior takes a dump. One might think she's there to help potty train, and she is showing him how to take a length and wad it up. Except that the kid (cub?) is old enough to speak articulately and even explain to her why Brand Whatever is so superior that she is laboring under a misapprehension and it requires no wadding. Now maybe it's just that I am not around children much, but isn't there something rather bizarre and disquieting about this scenario? 

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On March 31, 2017 at 4:12 PM, Duke2801 said:

Wanna jump together?? AFTER smacking the ad exec who approved that shitty commercial, obviously. I didn't think there could be a commercial that made my skin crawl more than those insipid Panera commercials.  But congrats Haribo, you've done the job. 

LOVE that Haribo ad....love, love, love!

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(edited)

Regarding the commercial with the kid with the belt that screams, "Mom! We have a situation!" Is that kid not old enough to operate that belt? If not, why put that belt on the kid at all? Won't mom have to help him every time he has to go to the bathroom? 

PS: The Haribo commercial makes me crazy. I want to hit the ass that says "Gooder" with a hammer. 

Edited by configdotsys
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3 hours ago, mojoween said:

I love the music in the Haribo ad because it makes me think of cartoons I watched in the eighties.  Gives me the warm fuzzies.

As I pointed put in another thread, it's exactly the same music as the "Nyah-nyah, nyah-nyah-nyah" that I remember kids using to taunt each other.

15 hours ago, themajormotoko said:

I am curious Sandman87:  Why are you boycotting Carl's Jr/Hardees?

Because of the commercials. Their "Don't bother me, I'm eating" ad campaign was the first time that commercials enraged me (as opposed to being merely annoying), and ever since then they have persisted in portraying their customers as narcissistic moronic scumbags.

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1 hour ago, Sandman87 said:

Because of the commercials. Their "Don't bother me, I'm eating" ad campaign was the first time that commercials enraged me (as opposed to being merely annoying), and ever since then they have persisted in portraying their customers as narcissistic moronic scumbags.

 

Hardee's may be the worst for me with all the slurping and chomping and ewww.

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1 hour ago, Sandman87 said:

Because of the commercials. Their "Don't bother me, I'm eating" ad campaign was the first time that commercials enraged me (as opposed to being merely annoying), and ever since then they have persisted in portraying their customers as narcissistic moronic scumbags.

Speaking of commercials you hate, I and my wife are personally especially hating the VW commercial that shows the couple having sex in the bug, then they have a kid, then they trade up to a four-door compact, then they have sex in the compact car, have another kid, then trade up to a sedan, then have sex in the sedan, have a third kid, and finally trade up to a VW SUV. We aren't prudes, but there's something about all of that that just really grinds our gears.

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On 4/1/2017 at 2:30 PM, forumfish said:

I looked to see if we had a "Commercials that creep you out" topic, but didn't see one. This is not only irritating as all get-out, but the poorly-done mouths give me the heebie-jeebies.

Progressive has done it again.

This reminds me of the creepy old Clutch Cargo cartoons, for those of you who are over 100 years old.  Immovable cartoon faces with realistic mouths moving during dialogue.  Stuff of nightmares.

(Goes to get brain bleach)

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2 minutes ago, spiderpig said:

This reminds me of the creepy old Clutch Cargo cartoons, for those of you who are over 100 years old.  Immovable cartoon faces with realistic mouths moving during dialogue.  Stuff of nightmares.

(Goes to get brain bleach)

OMG, that was some creepy shit!  I couldn't bear to watch Clutch Cargo!  You young'ns get yourself a treat and find some of those online.

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(edited)
42 minutes ago, Brattinella said:

OMG, that was some creepy shit!  I couldn't bear to watch Clutch Cargo!  You young'ns get yourself a treat and find some of those online.

Speaking of creepy, remember those. Quiznos commercials with the freaky looking hamster creatures with human mouths?

Edited by peacheslatour
Because proof reading is for losers
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5 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Speaking of creepy, remember those. Quiznos commercials with the freaky looking hamster creatures with human mouths?

Those things were nightmare inducing.

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On 3/18/2017 at 6:16 AM, spiderpig said:

Fellow Night Owls -

One of my default channels that will remain nameless (sounds like "Prude Letjerk") runs horrible, awful spots with animals behind bars or chain-link fences, while Sarah McLaughlin wails mournfully on the soundtrack.

That they're on late at night and seem to run for at least two minutes straight makes it all the worse.  I can't grab the remote fast enough.

BTW, every animal I've had in my lifetime was a rescue, and I work for a vet - but these spots are sheer torture.

 

On 3/18/2017 at 11:56 AM, peacheslatour said:

Don't feel alone. Literally everyone hates those. Completely ruined In the Arms of an Angel for me.

 

On 3/18/2017 at 0:01 PM, spiderpig said:

Thank you, Peaches.  We need to form a support group.

 

On 3/18/2017 at 0:03 PM, Brattinella said:

The Winter series of these ads are particularly horrible, chained out in the snow, etc. :(

I think there may be a connection between the time of the calendar year and the frequency. Fiscal quarters or whatever and airtime donations by the networks. It has been pretty rugged this past week.

All of our pets have been rescues also and we donate what we can, but it still creates an overwhelming sense of guilt. Also, since our TV is on almost all of the time, there is a pretty even chance that we could be snacking or having a meal, so that kind of survivors guilt kicks in too, eating while animals and children in desperate need.

Even now, I am feeling guilty - poor me, those mean commercials are making me sad - what a first world problem. Having a conscience is tough. Doesn't seem to bother the politicians though.

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1 hour ago, peacheslatour said:

Speaking of creepy, remember those. Quiznos commercials with the freaky looking hamster creatures with human mouths?

 

1 hour ago, Popples said:

Those things were nightmare inducing.

LOL. My wife and I were just talking about those yesterday. The reason we were thinking about that is because we watched Groundhog Day, and the guy in the hall that greets Bill Murray every day did the voice for Baby Bob, who was featured in Quiznos' commercials before the "spongmonkey"/rat things.

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(edited)
29 minutes ago, SoSueMe said:

I think there may be a connection between the time of the calendar year and the frequency. Fiscal quarters or whatever and airtime donations by the networks. It has been pretty rugged this past week.

All of our pets have been rescues also and we donate what we can, but it still creates an overwhelming sense of guilt. Also, since our TV is on almost all of the time, there is a pretty even chance that we could be snacking or having a meal, so that kind of survivors guilt kicks in too, eating while animals and children in desperate need.

Even now, I am feeling guilty - poor me, those mean commercials are making me sad - what a first world problem. Having a conscience is tough. Doesn't seem to bother the politicians though.

I had to stop watching digital stations because I'd be inundated with those commercials. I posted somewhere (maybe in this thread?) that apparently I can no longer watch ION or USA Network online during the day, during the week either.

I tell myself the poor animals in the commercials were rescued and helped.

Edited by theredhead77
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6 hours ago, MrSmith said:

Speaking of commercials you hate, I and my wife are personally especially hating the VW commercial that shows the couple having sex in the bug, then they have a kid, then they trade up to a four-door compact, then they have sex in the compact car, have another kid, then trade up to a sedan, then have sex in the sedan, have a third kid, and finally trade up to a VW SUV. We aren't prudes, but there's something about all of that that just really grinds our gears.

So to speak. LOL

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I know it has been much-discussed, but I just saw for the first time the Haribo commercial where all the people in a business meeting talk like children.  Put me firmly on Team Hate.  I've always hated the Haribo jingle, but with this commercial the preceding dialogue is actually far worse.  Oh my god; I'm still cringing.

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10 hours ago, Bastet said:

I know it has been much-discussed, but I just saw for the first time the Haribo commercial where all the people in a business meeting talk like children.  Put me firmly on Team Hate.  I've always hated the Haribo jingle, but with this commercial the preceding dialogue is actually far worse.  Oh my god; I'm still cringing.

Wow. I just went and looked that commercial up on YouTube. That commercial was nothing short of ... amazing. As in, amazing that there's actually a worse commercial than the VW one I posted about. I don't know how any of the people in that commercial are able to show their faces in public. I would be too ashamed of lip-syncing and acting that out to ever go out again without a bag on my head.

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1 hour ago, MrSmith said:

Wow. I just went and looked that commercial up on YouTube. That commercial was nothing short of ... amazing. As in, amazing that there's actually a worse commercial than the VW one I posted about. I don't know how any of the people in that commercial are able to show their faces in public. I would be too ashamed of lip-syncing and acting that out to ever go out again without a bag on my head.

Really? Wow, I found that commercial kinda cute.  Seeing adults in business suits with these cute little kid voices is rather sweet.

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On 4/2/2017 at 0:55 PM, configdotsys said:

Regarding the commercial with the kid with the belt that screams, "Mom! We have a situation!" Is that kid not old enough to operate that belt? If not, why put that belt on the kid at all? Won't mom have to help him every time he has to go to the bathroom? 

Awwww...I love that kid.  And speaking from someone who learned the hard way:

When my son was about that age, several of the outfits I bought him came with a matching belt.  Cute, right?  Well, not if you have a kid who waits until the very last minute to go to the bathroom.  That's probably why I like that ad---I can relate.

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(edited)
2 hours ago, Dirtybubble said:

Really? Wow, I found that commercial kinda cute.  Seeing adults in business suits with these cute little kid voices is rather sweet.

Ah, well that's definitely the difference for me -- "cute" is pretty much the exact opposite of how I'd describe the voices.  More like "nails on a chalkboard annoying."  They'd be bad enough coming out of children, so hearing them from adults (especially that guy who says "gooder") is only worse.  It seems like the commercial has been around for a while and I was lucky to never encounter it until last night, so hopefully I won't happen upon it again, but if I do I will be lunging for the remote to protect my ears.

When I read a lot of comments about a commercial in this thread before seeing it, it usually sounds so bad that when I finally see it, it never quite matches up to what I had in my mind; I wind up thinking, "Oh, it's not that bad."  This one I found almost stunningly annoying, and said out loud, "Wow, it's even worse than they made it seem."

Edited by Bastet
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9 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Ah, well that's definitely the difference for me -- "cute" is pretty much the exact opposite of how I'd describe the voices.  More like "nails on a chalkboard annoying."  They'd be bad enough coming out of children, so hearing them from adults (especially that guy who says "gooder") is only worse.  It seems like the commercial has been around for a while and I was lucky to never encounter it until last night, so hopefully I won't happen upon it again, but if I do I will be lunging for the remote to protect my ears.

When I read a lot of comments about a commercial in this thread before seeing it, it usually sounds so bad that when I finally see it, it never quite matches up to what I had in my mind; I wind up thinking, "Oh, it's not that bad."  This one I found almost stunningly annoying, and said out loud, "Wow, it's even worse than they made it seem."

Really?  "More gooder" just sounds like a phrase a small child would use to me so seeing it come out of an adult's mouth just adds to the fun & silliness.  But tomato potato everyone sees/hears things diferrrently :)

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6 minutes ago, Dirtybubble said:

Really?  "More gooder" just sounds like a phrase a small child would use to me so seeing it come out of an adult's mouth just adds to the fun & silliness.  But tomato potato everyone sees/hears things diferrrently :)

I'm with you DB, I think it's cute as all get out. I like seeing corporate types reveal they were not always money grubbing cynics.

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(edited)

Yep, really.  As I said, I think we've illustrated the fundamental difference in our reactions to the commercial -- I don't think those child voices or phrases are cute in the first place, so having them come out of adult mouths only makes them even more annoying.

Shifting gears, I also saw the razor commercial where a woman (played by either Piper Perabo or a look-alike) gets a text that her boyfriend is on his way, and bringing his mom, so she jumps out of bed to frantically put the place in order (well, sort of), all while shaving her legs.  That one is stupid on so many levels.  The text reads as if bringing his mom with him is news, which is a total dick move; she should text him back that it's not a good time and go back to sleep.  But, okay, she decides to play host.  Just put on some pants.  Yeah, that razor has shaving "gel" built in, but you still need to get it wet, so she's flinging soapy water drops - not to mention little leg hairs - all over the apartment as she multi-tasks.  And, lastly, as someone else commented, that dress she puts on is a really juvenile style, plus she does this "cutesy" little move when she opens the door.  Ugh.

Edited by Bastet
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19 minutes ago, Silver Raven said:

Are we supposed to believe that that little kid in the Cottonelle ad came up with feeling like a "sparkly mermaid" all by himself?

Well, being gay isn't a choice you know. He's probably very self aware. NTTAWWI

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7 hours ago, MrSmith said:

I would be too ashamed of lip-syncing and acting that out to ever go out again without a bag on my head.

It's more likely that the voicing is done to match the actors, rather than have the actors lip-syncing; it's also possible they're just abusing auto-tune technology to make the actors' voices all sound like that.

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(edited)
5 hours ago, LoneHaranguer said:

it's also possible they're just abusing auto-tune technology to make the actors' voices all sound like that.

Something like that is my guess; all the voices sound similarly manufacture.

Edited by Bastet
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(edited)

While I loathe the commercial, there's a special place in hell for the guy with the red one. I swear he says he likes the "lemon" one cause it tastes "like berries."  (I'm assuming he says the "red one" but it seems there're too many syllables for that. But I'm not gonna waste any <more> time pondering this nonsense.)

If you fuck around with the voices, expect people to mis-hear what they're saying. More gooder, indeed. And while you're at it, get off my lawn.

Edited by Prevailing Wind
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4 minutes ago, Prevailing Wind said:

While I loathe the commercial, there's a special place in hell for the guy with the red one. I swear he says he likes the "lemon" one cause it tastes "like berries."  (I'm assuming he says the "red one" but it seems there're too many syllables for that. But I'm not gonna waste any <more> time pondering this nonsense.)

If you fuck around with the voices, expect people to mis-hear what they're saying. More gooder, indeed. And while you're at it, get off my lawn.

I think he says the "red" one.

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19 hours ago, Jamoche said:

Funny thing about that "Carl's Sr" ad - there's still hardly any women in it who aren't being sexual objects.

I hope this doesn't surprise anyone. We're talking about the same folks who had an ad featuring Paris Hilton molesting a car while eating one of their burgers.

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1 minute ago, Sandman87 said:

I hope this doesn't surprise anyone. We're talking about the same folks who had an ad featuring Paris Hilton molesting a car while eating one of their burgers.

A year from now the all-male marketing department will be surprised that the new campaign isn't bringing in any new customers. Other than that, no.

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