The Duggalos: Jinger and the Holy Goalie

[BunnyBlueBrown]

1 hour ago, Jeeves said:

In that post, I said that not only did Jeremy fill out JB's 50-page "permission to court" questionnaire, he turned in 100 pages.

Now I'm wondering if I got that wrong. I know one of the sons-in-law did the 100 page reply, but now I think it might have been Ben, not Jeremy. Apologies if I goofed about that point.

No you were right...it was Jeremy 

[GeeGolly]

Other than a picture or two when Jessa and Jinger were toddlers and then Jinger's speech, we only know the two were close because Michelle and Jessa keep telling us they are. But like @Churchhoney pointed out, their definition of best friends may not be our definition. When Jinger said how Jessa has been there to help her out, it could have been that when Jinger expressed her desire to experience life outside of a rural area, Jessa prayed with her to be content with NWA. Out of all the kids Jessa seems the least able to form a deep connection, so I'm guessing that their best friend status had more to do with having only a year between them and being told they were close, and they latched onto it.

[ginger90]

6 hours ago, Jeeves said:

Earlier today, I posted my opinion that in getting JB's permission to court and marry Jinger, Jeremy beat JB at his own game, in JB's home court.

In that post, I said that not only did Jeremy fill out JB's 50-page "permission to court" questionnaire, he turned in 100 pages.

Now I'm wondering if I got that wrong. I know one of the sons-in-law did the 100 page reply, but now I think it might have been Ben, not Jeremy. Apologies if I goofed about that point.

It was Jeremy , and it was 105 pages.

[Churchhoney]

23 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

It was Jeremy , and it was 105 pages.

The best part, and it wouldn't surprise me if this were true, would be if the last 90 pages just said Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah. 

[lascuba]

8 hours ago, Kokapetl said:

Jessa's been on her very best behaviour since Josh's scandals. The way she suddenly started  smiling all the time reminds me of Hillary Clinton. 

I think Jinger really was fortunate being child #6 and sister mom #4. Anyone younger and lower ranked than Jill could rope in Jill and Jana, (the supervisors) to crack the whip or make any decisions, and Jinger could also maybe consult the dissenting opinions of Jessa. Jana was and is figuratively fucked over by this arrangement. Jackson and Jana are attached to each other in a parent/child way. She won't leave. Not Without Her Son. 

The change was immediate, too. She was all angry defiance during the Megyn Kelly interview, and when she got flack for that, she became all smiles and sweet voiced in the sex-abuse special, because she's a Duggar and thought the hate was over her attitude and not primarily over the shit she said. I want angry Jessa back.

2 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Other than a picture or two when Jessa and Jinger were toddlers and then Jinger's speech, we only know the two were close because Michelle and Jessa keep telling us they are. But like @Churchhoney pointed out, their definition of best friends may not be our definition. When Jinger said how Jessa has been there to help her out, it could have been that when Jinger expressed her desire to experience life outside of a rural area, Jessa prayed with her to be content with NWA. Out of all the kids Jessa seems the least able to form a deep connection, so I'm guessing that their best friend status had more to do with having only a year between them and being told they were close, and they latched onto it.

That's Jill's m.o., since she was the one so rigid that she couldn't let Jinger say, "city please!" without comment. I know Jessa is perceived as being an unfeeling and uncaring bitch, but she's demonstrated, more than any of her sisters, that she knows her siblings well. When they all met Derick via Skype and he asked them to describe Jill, Jessa was the only one who said things specific to Jill, not some generic fundie description. When talking about the type of man Jana wants, Jessa was the only one who seemed to have any clue. I can see Jessa being supportive of Jinger when Jill scolded her on camera, and the fact that she introduced Jeremy--who, while not currently living in a city, grew up in cities and has lived in other parts of the world--to Jinger says a lot.

Jessa not being affectionate and having an attitude doesn't mean she's incapable of feelings. Jill cries at the drop of a hat and yet she couldn't even form any type of closeness with the siblings closest to her in age.

[Annb67]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

It was Jeremy , and it was 105 pages.

This is why I tend to like him. Sure our belief system doesn't really match up but with this he simply told JB f*** you. And there is the drinking, no babies yet and subtle smacks at the Dullards. Simply put this was a pi**ing contest and Jeremy won. Go Jeremy.

[Nysha]

11 hours ago, Kokapetl said:

Jackson and Jana are attached to each other in a parent/child way. She won't leave. Not Without Her Son. 

I thought this about Jill and Jenni, but Jill managed to break those ties pretty damn quick. I do think part of the reason that Jana is willingly single is that she is emotionally attached to her younger siblings in a parental way and wants to continue raising them until they can fend for themselves. God knows JB & Michelle don't give a squat about them.

[BunnyBlueBrown]

5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Other than a picture or two when Jessa and Jinger were toddlers and then Jinger's speech, we only know the two were close because Michelle and Jessa keep telling us they are. But like @Churchhoney pointed out, their definition of best friends may not be our definition. When Jinger said how Jessa has been there to help her out, it could have been that when Jinger expressed her desire to experience life outside of a rural area, Jessa prayed with her to be content with NWA. Out of all the kids Jessa seems the least able to form a deep connection, so I'm guessing that their best friend status had more to do with having only a year between them and being told they were close, and they latched onto it.

Jinger showed their closeness when Jessa was getting married....Jinger was a wreck

[Marigold]

2 hours ago, lascuba said:

The change was immediate, too. She was all angry defiance during the Megyn Kelly interview, and when she got flack for that, she became all smiles and sweet voiced in the sex-abuse special, because she's a Duggar and thought the hate was over her attitude and not primarily over the shit she said. I want angry Jessa back.

That's Jill's m.o., since she was the one so rigid that she couldn't let Jinger say, "city please!" without comment. I know Jessa is perceived as being an unfeeling and uncaring bitch, but she's demonstrated, more than any of her sisters, that she knows her siblings well. When they all met Derick via Skype and he asked them to describe Jill, Jessa was the only one who said things specific to Jill, not some generic fundie description. When talking about the type of man Jana wants, Jessa was the only one who seemed to have any clue. I can see Jessa being supportive of Jinger when Jill scolded her on camera, and the fact that she introduced Jeremy--who, while not currently living in a city, grew up in cities and has lived in other parts of the world--to Jinger says a lot.

Jessa not being affectionate and having an attitude doesn't mean she's incapable of feelings. Jill cries at the drop of a hat and yet she couldn't even form any type of closeness with the siblings closest to her in age.

Totally agree.  

I also think that Jinger and Jessa have difficulty regulating their behavior and emotions.  Both girls are either too bitchy, too meek, too bossy, too much eye roll, too smiley, too giggly, too much crying, too angry...

I feel like their true personalities never really developed.  They are in a canoe, trying not to tip...sometimes they rock too far in one direction, self correct and then rock too far in the other direction. 

I do realize that they "perform" for the cameras but over the years, you can see them shift around, trying to find balance.  May be a good sign that they are trying to actually find themselves. 

[BitterApple]

4 minutes ago, Marigold said:

Totally agree.  

I also think that Jinger and Jessa have difficulty regulating their behavior and emotions.  Both girls are either too bitchy, too meek, too bossy, too much eye roll, too smiley, too giggly, too much crying, too angry...

I feel like their true personalities never really developed.  They are in a canoe, trying not to tip...sometimes they rock too far in one direction, self correct and then rock too far in the other direction. 

Well said. For the first 20 years of their lives, the girls knew nothing but "keep sweet or you're off to Reprogramming Camp." They've never been allowed to express opinions, desires, frustrations or disappointments. It's no wonder that, as adults, they're stunted emotionally.

[xwordfanatik]

14 hours ago, floridamom said:

Jinger isn't going to miss hanging out with her sisters much and playing with them; Jeremy's got something much more interesting to play with and no one or nothing will be better than that for these suppressed women. No competition, Jeremy wins, hands down. Jinger isn't thinking about the TTH; she's too busy having sex with Baaaaaaabe, admiring Baaabe working out, etc.

LOL, so true.  So far, Jing has shown to be the horniest daughter!  She's got a new toy, and doesn't want to let it go! hahahaha

[Churchhoney]

4 hours ago, DOBABYR said:

Jinger showed their closeness when Jessa was getting married....Jinger was a wreck

It still doesn't mean they were close, though, necessarily. I speak from experience. You still can have strong emotions when you don't have any idea what "close" actually means. You might actually have an even stronger reaction before you've ever had an actual close relationship, because you're reacting to losses you're suffering without even realizing what they are. I did that. 

 Jinger's upset wasn't proof one way or another of the actual nature of their relationship. 

[floridamom]

Since Jessa's 'change in personality' was immediate, I believe she's acting for the camera. Jessa was never known to be the one who had a smile on her face, etc., she was the bossy one, if I remember correctly. She had a hard edge to her as her brothers and sisters described her. I think Jessa, for the most part, is insincere on camera and we'll never know who she really is.

Back to Jinger... I think Jinger has always been herself on screen and off. I think she really and truly tried to hold a positive attitude and just wanted to 'ok' with everyone in her family. She may have had a few passing doubtful thoughts about all that Gothard/parent crap over the years, and dismissed them for fear of rocking the TTH boat. Now that she's with Jeremy, who's not severe in his lifestyle, she's having a great time out there. To Jinger, her life right now compares to going off to college and attending those all night 'keggers'. She can perhaps dabble in who she would like to grow up and be. Jeremy would welcome growth out of her and that's good too.

[Marigold]

56 minutes ago, floridamom said:

Since Jessa's 'change in personality' was immediate, I believe she's acting for the camera. Jessa was never known to be the one who had a smile on her face, etc., she was the bossy one, if I remember correctly. She had a hard edge to her as her brothers and sisters described her. I think Jessa, for the most part, is insincere on camera and we'll never know who she really is.

Back to Jinger... I think Jinger has always been herself on screen and off. I think she really and truly tried to hold a positive attitude and just wanted to 'ok' with everyone in her family. She may have had a few passing doubtful thoughts about all that Gothard/parent crap over the years, and dismissed them for fear of rocking the TTH boat. Now that she's with Jeremy, who's not severe in his lifestyle, she's having a great time out there. To Jinger, her life right now compares to going off to college and attending those all night 'keggers'. She can perhaps dabble in who she would like to grow up and be. Jeremy would welcome growth out of her and that's good too.

I think that is Jessa trying to "right herself" in a rocky canoe.  Too far one way and she over corrects the other way.  

Jessa needed to be tough at home with 18 siblings and kooky parents so she was.  Now that she is really carrying Counting On, she has to be smiley and warm and so she is.  She is trying out that personality and now that looks fake.

I don't know what to say about Jinger...she was supposed to be meek and she was.  Not sure who she is now...neither is she. 

Jinger and Jessa will get it together at some point.  I hope. 

[BunnyBlueBrown]

1 hour ago, Churchhoney said:

It still doesn't mean they were close, though, necessarily. I speak from experience. You still can have strong emotions when you don't have any idea what "close" actually means. You might actually have an even stronger reaction before you've ever had an actual close relationship, because you're reacting to losses you're suffering without even realizing what they are. I did that. 

 Jinger's upset wasn't proof one way or another of the actual nature of their relationship. 

Nah, Jinger explicitly stated it was Jessa and their friendship

[Churchhoney]

7 minutes ago, DOBABYR said:

Nah, Jinger explicitly stated it was Jessa and their friendship

Yeah, I know. But here's my point (and I get that nobody who hasn't lived something like this is likely to understand what I mean, but here it is anyway:)  if Jinger didn't actually know what friendship is -- and in that family she wouldn't, if my similar experience is a guide (and of course it may not be) -- then her saying that means little or nothing about whether they were actually "close" the way most people would think of "closeness" or "BFFs" or whatever. When I was a kid, I thought I knew what those things were, too, because my parents told me that I did and told me what they were. Jinger's parents have told her that, too. But if the Duggar parents are doing what I expect they're doing -- completely squelching all honesty, all privacy, all honest feeling, all intimacy, all opportunity for actual trust -- then they had only the very shallowest of "friendships" even though it was the biggest thing in Jinger's life, nevertheless. 

It's the way everybody always complains about the girls gushing over how they've "married my best friend" when it's somebody they barely know. But if I'm right, then their concepts of what "best friend" means are so shallow and pitiful that in fact they're not lying at all. It's the way they envision friendship. Because they've never been allowed to know what it mean.s 

So that's what's going on if the Duggar parents are the way I think they are. On the other hand, of the Duggar parents are different from the way I believe they are, then you may well be right in thinking that Jinger and Jessa had a real, deep friendship of the kind that most people envision. That's all I'm saying. 

[RedheadZombie]

12 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Other than a picture or two when Jessa and Jinger were toddlers and then Jinger's speech, we only know the two were close because Michelle and Jessa keep telling us they are. But like @Churchhoney pointed out, their definition of best friends may not be our definition. When Jinger said how Jessa has been there to help her out, it could have been that when Jinger expressed her desire to experience life outside of a rural area, Jessa prayed with her to be content with NWA. Out of all the kids Jessa seems the least able to form a deep connection, so I'm guessing that their best friend status had more to do with having only a year between them and being told they were close, and they latched onto it.

Maybe Jessa tutored her on providing the bare minimum to your buddy, and getting out of the hard work while doubling the older J's responsibilities. Jessa is almost brilliant in this group of minimally educated people.  I'm sure she figured out many ways to get out of doing what she didn't like. What she did like - controlling what was packed for everyone, and holding down small children who break rules, she did magnificently.  If I didn't dislike her so much I could respect how clever she is. 

[lascuba]

Going by  an "objective" (if there is such a thing) definition of friendship and closeness, I agree with @Churchhoney that Jinger and Jessa likely weren't truly close. But going by how the Duggars define it--going by the parameters of their stunted emotions--they absolutely were close. It's not something that Michelle, Jim Bob and Jessa exaggerated about and Jinger didn't feel that way because Jessa was so mean to her. Jinger has always been consistent with her comments about her relationship with Jessa.  It's not like that fake, forced closeness between Jana and Jill.

Edited July 10, 2017 by lascuba

[Spencer Hastings]

"Close" is really in the eye of the beholder.  There are people in my own life who would probably think we are close, while I would describe us as acquaintances (and vice versa). Your own worldview and experiences with people in general define what a "close" relationship is. Anyone who hasn't lived in that compound is going to have a different perspective than Jessa and Jinger would, and their perspectives would vary as well.

Edited July 10, 2017 by Spencer Hastings

[BitterApple]

33 minutes ago, RedheadZombie said:

Maybe Jessa tutored her on providing the bare minimum to your buddy, and getting out of the hard work while doubling the older J's responsibilities. Jessa is almost brilliant in this group of minimally educated people.  I'm sure she figured out many ways to get out of doing what she didn't like. What she did like - controlling what was packed for everyone, and holding down small children who break rules, she did magnificently.  If I didn't dislike her so much I could respect how clever she is. 

IIRC, Jessa was the packer and Jinger did the laundry, correct? So that right there gave them an opportunity to hide out in other rooms of the house and not have to deal with the cooking, cleaning, crying toddlers and overall tedium of endless childcare. They did the bare minimum for their buddy group and ignored everyone else. Smart move on their part, but that must have sucked for Jill and Jana. 

I do believe Jessa and Jinger were genuinely close, even by 'normal people" standards. However now that Jinger is stepping out of her comfort zone, I wonder if that will continue. Speaking personally, I've had friends that I was really tight with in high school and college, but sort of outgrew as the years passed and I matured and developed new interests. It wouldn't surprise me if that happened with these two. 

Edited July 10, 2017 by BitterApple

[mythoughtis]

Jinger and Jessa were accountability partners for each other- and therefore, possibly got off the ranch to run errands, volunteer at a coffee shop etc. they were close. But different life experiences change that,even for siblings. Jessa has two kids, lives under Mom and Dads shadow, owing them her paycheck and adhering to the party line. Jinger is out of state, kidless, enjoying 7 nights a week of date night, wearing pants, and probably running errands on her own. Think about it. You went off to college, your best friend got married and had kids. Are you still close at your 5 year reunion? 

[Scarlett45]

2 hours ago, mythoughtis said:

Jinger and Jessa were accountability partners for each other- and therefore, possibly got off the ranch to run errands, volunteer at a coffee shop etc. they were close. But different life experiences change that,even for siblings. Jessa has two kids, lives under Mom and Dads shadow, owing them her paycheck and adhering to the party line. Jinger is out of state, kidless, enjoying 7 nights a week of date night, wearing pants, and probably running errands on her own. Think about it. You went off to college, your best friend got married and had kids. Are you still close at your 5 year reunion? 

If you genuinely love each other yes you can be close. Perhaps I'm a statistical outlier because at 31 I'm still very close with my first friend from kindergarten and have had the same BFF for 17 years, but I don't have any siblings I can have a peer relationships with, and they are only children- I hear only children keep friends like that because they don't have siblings  

I think Jinger and Jessa love each other in a genuine way and will probably be close until old age. When your love for someone is long lasting like that, there may be periods where you have more or less in common but the love and emotional intimacy doesn't go away (even if you have different socialization companions/life style habits). Jinger is basking her her post wedding glow and all that hot sex with Jeremy- she knows her sister will always be there for her (and Jessa gets that too). 

 

Yes the Duggar kids have been sheltered and brainwashed by their parents BUT they are still people with emotional needs and preferences. I'm sure there are genuine friendships and deep connections among at least a few of the siblings by sheer probability!

Edited July 11, 2017 by Scarlett45
No need to say "emotional needs" twice.

[TigerLily20]

14 hours ago, ginger90 said:

It was Jeremy , and it was 105 pages.

ok so wait, is this true, is there actually a 5 page questionnaire the guys have to fill out?  Is there any proof of this and Jeremy's 105 page paper?  It's both sad and awesome.....

[floridamom]

It's a 50 page questionnaire that Boob hands the courting male applicants...

[Marigold]

Someone posted a link to a questionnaire that we think was Jim Bob's.  I didn't save it...anyone have the link? 

[Sew Sumi]

14 minutes ago, floridamom said:

It's a 50 page questionnaire that Boob hands the courting male applicants...

It's more like 50 questions with space for the applicant to write his responses. 

@Marigold I remember seeing that questionnaire, but have no clue who posted it or where they found it! I just remember my eyes rolling way back into my head after pretty much every question. 

[floridamom]

Yes, they showed Jinger shopping ALONE in Laredo, but they could have made it interesting and sat her down and asked her what it felt  like to go out by herself for the first times in her life....but they didn't take advantage of a good opportunity. TLC is the worst.

[ginger90]

36 minutes ago, TigerLily20 said:

ok so wait, is this true, is there actually a 5 page questionnaire the guys have to fill out?  Is there any proof of this and Jeremy's 105 page paper?  It's both sad and awesome.....

Here's a clip

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_PZjCPtJnNQ

[DangerousMinds]

She wasn't even shopping alone if the cameras were there.

[lookeyloo]

9 hours ago, floridamom said:

Yes, they showed Jinger shopping ALONE in Laredo, but they could have made it interesting and sat her down and asked her what it felt  like to go out by herself for the first times in her life....but they didn't take advantage of a good opportunity. TLC is the worst.

Or jinger and/or Jeremy said they weren't going to address that issue. I wish they would just have cameras following them. To me the show seems semi scripted - they pick and choose what will be asked and answered and have multiple "takes" till it comes out right. 

[Natalie68]

22 hours ago, Marigold said:

I think that is Jessa trying to "right herself" in a rocky canoe.  Too far one way and she over corrects the other way.  

Jessa needed to be tough at home with 18 siblings and kooky parents so she was.  Now that she is really carrying Counting On, she has to be smiley and warm and so she is.  She is trying out that personality and now that looks fake.

I don't know what to say about Jinger...she was supposed to be meek and she was.  Not sure who she is now...neither is she. 

Jinger and Jessa will get it together at some point.  I hope. 

What is FANTASTIC about this is she may just get to find out.  Before becoming a mom she may be able to become Jinger.  Honestly I would be interested in her having her own show with Babe.  She, so far, has shown the most hope at becoming mainstream.  

[TigerLily20]

23 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Here's a clip

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_PZjCPtJnNQ

oh my word....I seriously thought it wasn't true.......

[babyhouseman]

I'm a female and was 9 pounds, 1 ounce at birth in 1972. I was breech, and my mother had me naturally. Why the doctor didn't do a c-section, I don't know. It was hard on me and my mother, but we got through it. My father said after that, they were having no more children.  I'm an only child and 5 feet 9 inches and a half.  

[Marigold]

I FOUND IT!

Jim Bob's Questionnaire?

Churchhoney posted this in the Counting On After Show episode last season.  It's the possible questionnaire that the guys filled out.   It looks on target to me.  It's the right length and the questions look like Gothard nonsense. You know Jim Bob didn't write up 50 pages. He got it from somewhere. 

[McManda]

Holy crap, that's ridiculous. I skimmed to question #100 and then noped out of the rest.

It reminds me of all the internet surveys that were popular in the late 90s/early 00s. You know, the ones you'd chain email to friends to "learn more about them" but really no one read the whole thing. There's no way JB reads the whole thing.

To be fair, I'm not surprised Jeremy returned 100 pages. Just answering each question with a line or two would get you that many pages.

Edited July 12, 2017 by McManda

[mythoughtis]

I read the first 13 questions, cringing. If I were a guy, I wouldn't  answer them just so I could be in the chaperoned presence of a girl. They are pretty invasive.   look, my spouse has told me some of his life history, and vice versa- but he didn't tell me most  of it before our first date. 

 

This is is one reason why Jana is single- very few men over 25 are going to deal with this stuff. 

[kokapetl]

Over 400 questions!

Games:
413. Do you play games?
414. Do you have any problems with the following:
415. Board Games?
416. Dice? 
417. Playing Cards? (not gambling) 

These are the things that matter. 

[crazycatlady58]

Has anyone  read the comments ?   So funny.

[Marigold]

You can see how self involved JereME could write over 100 pages.  He loves to pontificate. 

[Annb67]

4 hours ago, Kokapetl said:

Over 400 questions!

Games:
413. Do you play games?
414. Do you have any problems with the following:
415. Board Games?
416. Dice? 
417. Playing Cards? (not gambling) 

These are the things that matter. 

Funny answers..

Board games? Yes..ouji is my favorite.

Dice...Yes but only in dark alleys.

Playing cards..No gambling for money that would be wrong. Strictly strip poker.

[Natalie68]

4 hours ago, Kokapetl said:

Over 400 questions!

Games:
413. Do you play games?
414. Do you have any problems with the following:
415. Board Games?
416. Dice? 
417. Playing Cards? (not gambling) 

These are the things that matter. 

Yes of course.  We play Old Jana (instead of Old Maid).

[twinkietwin94]

4 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Has anyone  read the comments ?   So funny.

Couldn't force myself to read all of the questions but I read the comments and laughed a lot

[JoanArc]

Quote

310. Can I see your last 4 months worth of bank statements?

377. How often do you go to the altar?

384. Do you suffer from any chronic disease or condition?
385. Are you willing to take a physical exam by a physician before marriage?
386. What is your understanding of proper health and nutrition?
387. How do you support your own health and nutrition?406. How do you respond when you see a girl that isn’t dressed right?
407. Would you describe for me what you think is wrong or what bothers you about a lewdly dressed woman.
408. Would you have a Curse Free Unit?

421. What happens when someone talks to you or comes in the room while you are watching a movie or playing a video game?

 

[Churchhoney]

6 hours ago, Kokapetl said:

Over 400 questions!

Games:
413. Do you play games?
414. Do you have any problems with the following:
415. Board Games?
416. Dice? 
417. Playing Cards? (not gambling) 

These are the things that matter. 

How do you "have problems" with "board games"? Binge eating after playing Candyland? Murderous impulses after an intense round of Clue? What?

Edited July 12, 2017 by Churchhoney

[JoanArc]

1 minute ago, Churchhoney said:

How do you "have problems" with "board games"? Binge eating after playing Candyland? Murderous impulses after an intense round of Clue? What?

Dice imply gambling?

[Churchhoney]

7 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

Dice imply gambling?

Probably . Plus, I was forgetting that this is a family that thinks Hide and Seek is a leading cause of sexual assault. .... Who knows what Gothard said about board games when he got through talking about Cabbage Patch dolls? 

[Sew Sumi]

They play board and card games all the time. I don't think this is Boob's survey, although he likely sampled it 

[Churchhoney]

4 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

They play board and card games all the time. I don't think this is Boob's survey, although he likely sampled it 

Don't they usually play with bible-type cards or the like, though? I agree that this is not Boob's questionnaire and may not be Gothard-related either -- be just made up or come from some other crazy group with some similar notions.

But I was thinking that they do have -- or at least have had in the past -- some rules about only playing the holy games ... ?

[lascuba]

Are those questions meant to be asked by the daughter or her father? Like, "Can I see your last four back statements?" Is the wannabe courter showing them to his potential future father-in-law or to the girl he wants to court. 

14 hours ago, mythoughtis said:

I read the first 13 questions, cringing. If I were a guy, I wouldn't  answer them just so I could be in the chaperoned presence of a girl. They are pretty invasive.   look, my spouse has told me some of his life history, and vice versa- but he didn't tell me most  of it before our first date. 

 

This is is one reason why Jana is single- very few men over 25 are going to deal with this stuff. 

Which begs the question, would you (general you) have continued dating him if he did tell you his life history before your first date? I'm thinking of my long term relationships, and while none of them had any scandalous histories, there's some stuff on paper that would have given me pause if I knew of them before getting to know them.  That's one reason such a detailed questionnaire is so weird (and probably why Jana is still single, assuming she wants to be married)--yes, it's important to know things about a potential partner and one should lay their dealbreakers on the table from the start, but knowing all the minutiae of a person's life without context is going to turn most people off from the start. Which is why any "wordly" man filling out that questionnaire probably lies. 

[kaleidoscope]

Too bad Josh didn't have to fill out that questionnaire for Anna's father!