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S08.E03: The Biggest Boob


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I just remembered something I thought was really odd...when Dorinda made mention of the fact that Ramona was in the fourth row at Richard's funeral.  WTF???  How is that significant?  Is there a hierarchy for guests at a funeral? 

Edited by ichbin
  • Love 13
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Only if he was a super nice, very cool funny guy, first name begins with T, and very handsome (looked like Kris Kristofferson at his prime and best.)  I'd say a baby carrot described it well, did Bethenny come up with that, or did Ramona?

 

Yuppers - to all of it.  Also gave the most amazing back massages (with baby powder!).  Ring any bells yet???   ;-)

 

Really old joke about the morning after the wedding night:

 

she: "My dear, I didn't know your organ was so small"

he: "My dear, I didn't know I was playing in a cathedral"

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I know it's been covered already, but I really feel it bears repeating: Jules, the elderly comments are NOT a good look! Among the many reasons why, there's the reality that calling attention to the fact that some of these castmembers are old enough to be her mom has actually the EXACT OPPOSITE than what she intends.  She looks as old if not older than many of them - so pointing out how much older they are just forces us all to (re)confront the fact that she is 33-going-on-55!

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OK, I start every day with a cigarette & coffee, occasionally chased with a Bloody Caesar or other alcoholic libation, but I digress.  Is it possible we fucked the same needledick in college???  :-)

 

Apparently I didn't do enough drugs or alcohol to erase any of my early unsavory encounters from my memory ...  should've done harder shit than pot & hash, eh!

 

With all of that small penis talk, I was reminded of Sex and the City, when Samantha was in love with her boyfriend du jour (James - ?) and she described him as less than a Vienna sausage - more like a gherkin!    ;-)

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Mmmmmmmm Kris Kristofferson ...

 

 

Yeah, I thought so too.

 

OMG...Kris Kristofferson, circa mid-70's - and "A Star is Born" was probably the sexiest man on the planet!!!  I still get a tingle thinking about him looking like that!!  ;-)

Samantha gave it more time than I did, props to her.

 

OMG if Walnut Queen and I actually knew (in a biblical sense) the same guy.

 

You would be just like the RHNY - they all seem to have known (in a biblical sense) the same guys, too!    :-)

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Samantha gave it more time than I did, props to her.

 

OMG if Walnut Queen and I actually knew (in a biblical sense) the same guy.

 

That would be poetic, and WAY fuckin' cooler than Six Degrees from Kevin Bacon. 

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I'm willing to cut Jules some slack on the "elderly" comment. If she keeps making reference to them being old, then I'll revisit, but one exaggerated comment/low blow about the other women being older doesn't bother me too much... yet. It's such low-hanging fruit, it's barely an insult.

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OMG...Kris Kristofferson, circa mid-70's - and "A Star is Born" was probably the sexiest man on the planet!!!  I still get a tingle thinking about him looking like that!!  ;-)

 

You would be just like the RHNY - they all seem to have known (in a biblical sense) the same guys, too!    :-)

 

We could've shared the same Herpes as the girls who fucked Harry!  But we didn't.  :-(  ... :-)

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This was a sexier movie of his (not actually the movie, but a few scenes from it.  The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With The Sea.  Man there was a lot of gossip about that movie.  Ha.  There is a small shot of one of the sex scenes here.

 

He looked exactly like this, well, not the beard, same voice too. 

 

Anyway, for all you that wonder, NOT the same first name, unless Walnut Queen misheard her guy's.  Ha.

Edited by Umbelina
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I'm actually willing to cut Jules some slack, because she doesn't seem to be the quickest on her feet verbally - she may have meant "middle-aged" but blurted out "elderly' instead.

I wonder if Dorinda feels some misguided sense of loyalty to John. She often says that he stood by her when she was mourning Peter, mentioning him, missing him.

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Samantha gave it more time than I did, props to her.

OMG if Walnut Queen and I actually knew (in a biblical sense) the same guy.

You better let us know! :)

Oh, never mind -- just saw Umbelina's post. Darn! That would hve been some real PTV drama!

Edited by Thumper
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You better let us know! :)

Oh, never mind -- just saw Umbelina's post. Darn! That would hve been some real PTV drama!

 

I will now make it my mission in life to find a PTVer who DID.  Because I just KNOW that they're out there!!!  :-D

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Though I had to laugh when she lamented possibly not being able to use the dry cleaning gift certificate; no matter how much cash she has, she still wants shit for free.

It's how the rich say rich.

 

That 9k apartment Lu looked at was so damn tiny. Of course she'll be paying for the location, but damn. She'd never move to Brooklyn, but you really do get more for your money when you move to the outer boroughs.

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It's how the rich say rich.

 

That 9k apartment Lu looked at was so damn tiny. Of course she'll be paying for the location, but damn. She'd never move to Brooklyn, but you really do get more for your money when you move to the outer boroughs.

She is most likely living at her fiancé's apartment. The house hunting is so clearly away to shoehorn the two holdouts into episodes. Since at least Lu shows up at an actual event next week maybe the nonsense will end.

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You would be just like the RHNY - they all seem to have known (in a biblical sense) the same guys, too!    :-)

Sonja was on WWHL on Tuesday night.  Anyone else see it?  I think she said that both she and Ramona had previously dated Luanne's new guy. 

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I know I'm probably one of the few people left who actually like Bethenny (not that I like everything she does, she is certainly flawed), but she just cracks me up. I love how she stayed fairly calm with John and pointed out - "SkinnyCOW, Skinny Girl. You're a cow. And I'm a girl". Bahahaha!

 

But yea, I can totally see why there is frustration with Dorinda over the John situation. She was livid, LIVID. She told him what an embarrassment he was, how they were done. And then she shows up in the Hamptoms with him like everything's peachy and is all, "If you can't be nice to John, I've got nothing for ya!" What about John being nice to others??? Just a few nights ago she is sobbing in Bethenny's arms over him. I'm sure this is a situation that has played out several times, and it would get real old for me. She just can't have it both ways. 

 

 

Other random thoughts:

 

Jules needs to stop with the age shaming. Calling the women "the elderly". Get the fuck out of here with that. Bethenny is only one year older than her husband! And Carole, Lu, and Ramona are only about 5 years older than him. Is your husband "elderly"? 

 

My reaction to her dumb elderly comment?  I chuckled slightly -- but only because I thought it was directed solely at Moaner, who is almost 60.  Anytime someone insults Moaner, I can enjoy it.  After all, she has pretty much insulted everyone in her path, so I say she deserves any/every zinger possible.  But this ONLY goes for Moaner.  I can't stand age-shaming comments.  Calling the others, who are 45 to around 50, "elderly" is pretty fuckin' ridiculous -- even from a teenager, and Jules is hardly a teen.  Eh, so far, I'm not thinkin' much of Jules.

 

OK, I was totally lost with the Skinny Girl vs. Skinny Cow crapola.  Gotta say, I found nothing funny about any of this.  It was intense in an ugly way.  Yeah, I know, that's Bethenny.  God, she makes me nervous & anxious just watching her.  Not digging her at all this season.  Seemed to me like Bethenny went into this sparring match (with John) seething & looking for blood.  We know about Bethenny & the grudges she holds forever.  

 

There is certainly much more to the Bethenny/John rumble we don't know about.  My hunch is Bethenny wanted to settle some score.  Hey look, I get it.  John was absolutely no innocent in his behavior .  He was slamming her pretty good.  But I strongly suspect the edit monkeys were at work here to make John look horrible & Bethenny look like a sweet angel being bullied by the sloppy sweaty fat guy.  Um, no.  Sorry, edit monkeys, I don't believe that for one second.  We do know you work for Bethenny, edit monkeys.  There are pieces missing -- that I'm 100% certain of.  I am surprised Bethenny didn't order John's dead-on comments about her to be edited out.

 

I'm completely lost with Dorinda.  I'm just not gettin' her at all.  One second she's defending John, and the next, she's caving & throwing him under the bus with Bethenny (& Moaner).  Is she merely saying what she has to -- to appease Bethenny for the moment, because she knows that's what she has to do, so Bethenny will allow her to stay on the show?    Well, they all work for Bethenny now.  And oh what a truly horrible thing to have to endure.  Because if you don't lick Bethenny's toes or live in her asshole (as Carole does), who knows what kind awful/unbearable wrath she will set upon you.

 

I cringed at Bethenny saying Dorinda "drank the Kool-aid" (another tired/lame/overused Housewives expression I'd luv for them to stop saying) -- referring to Dorinda wanting to stay in the relationship with John.  It was insulting, offensive & condescending.  Seriously, where the fuck does she get off making this kind of judgement about Dorinda -- a woman she barely knows?  If someone (anyone) made this kind of comment about my relationship, I'd be furious.  Idk, it's gotten to a point for me, I can't understand how anyone could stand to be near anywhere Bethenny, let alone like her.  Oh, I have found her entertaining (in SMALL DOSES, thank you) in the past.  Idk, maybe it's the Bethenny overload we're getting that I just can't get with.

Edited by ScoobieDoobs
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Luann swanning around pretending to be able to afford 22 grand a month in rent is really laughable. Sad but laughable.

 

Seriously, who the fuck does Lu think she's kidding?  Oh my goodness, Lu, you've tried this lying shit on us sooooo many times before, hun.  We know you're a sex addict & we know you can't afford a 3 thou a month studio, let alone one of those over-priced joints you were looking at for 9 thou plus a month.  Honestly, this little segment really bugged the piss outta me.  Why?  Not because of Lu's dopey lies.  We expect that of Ms. Deluded Lu.  It's been ingrained in her since the show started.  

 

Fredrik said rather quickly (on WWHL) how these places were not good choices, just as he quickly (and no doubt, very much on target) said Sonja's crumbling townhouse was worth 7 mil (and that was being somewhat generous).  I am definitely NOT a Fredrik fan.  I think he's a smug/annoying queen, but he does know his shit.  Those were crummy choices.  This was an opportunity to show some really yummy Manhattan real estate porn.  We didn't get it.  OK Lu, if you're gonna lie to us, lie big.  I mean really, really big.  Entertain us, sweetie.  Go over to the Walker Tower in Chelsea & show us some of the $50 mil joints there.  Make yourself useful, Lu, will ya?

 

Sheesh, I'm sick to death of looking at Bethenny's meh SoHo place.  I wanna see amazing & gigantic places --  like the one Noah & Alison moved into in The Affair.  That's what I wanna see.  At least it would be a welcome & nice break from Bethenny's never-ending nasty-ass bullshit.

 

Oh hey, passed by Sonja's townhouse on my way home.  Guess what?  Windows were wide open & fraying curtains flying out.  Poor Sonja.  I think she shoulda asked Moaner to give her the grandma drapes she got rid of.  Or not.

Edited by ScoobieDoobs
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Seriously, who the fuck does Lu think she's kidding?  Oh my goodness, Lu, you've tried this lying shit on us sooooo many times before, hun.  We know you're a sex addict & we know you can't afford a 3 thou a month studio, let alone one of those over-priced joints you were looking at for 9 thou plus a month.  Honestly, this little segment really bugged the piss outta me.  Why?  Not because of Lu's dopey lies.  We expect that of Ms. Deluded Lu.  It's been ingrained in her since the show started.  

 

Fredrik said rather quickly (on WWHL) how these places were not good choices, just as he quickly (and no doubt, very much on target) said Sonja's crumbling townhouse was worth 7 mil (and that was being somewhat generous).  I am definitely NOT a Fredrik fan.  I think he's a smug/annoying queen, but he does know his shit.  Those were crummy choices.  This was an opportunity to show some really yummy Manhattan real estate porn.  We didn't get it.  OK Lu, if you're gonna lie to us, lie big.  I mean really, really big.  Entertain us, sweetie.  Go over to the Walker Tower in Chelsea & show us some of the $50 mil joints there.  Make yourself useful, Lu, will ya?

 

Sheesh, I'm sick to death of looking at Bethenny's meh SoHo place.  I wanna see amazing & gigantic places --  like the one Noah & Alison moved into in The Affair.  That's what I wanna see.  At least it would be a welcome & nice break from Bethenny's never-ending nasty-ass bullshit.

 

Oh hey, passed by Sonja's townhouse on my way home.  Guess what?  Windows were wide open & fraying curtains flying out.  Poor Sonja.  I think she shoulda asked Moaner to give her the grandma drapes she got rid of.  Or not.

Is it me or when they show Sonja's house the exterior looks different then last year??

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Reading about Bethenny's disdain for John's short stature and unconventional looks confuses me.

BF's most famous FWB is billionaire Warren Lichtenstein, not exactly a Pitt or a Clooney. And in the past year, she was photographed with Eric Stonestreet, a big guy, and Marcus Lemonis, not a hunk, and did nothing to dispel rumors she was dating them (obviously not though, in retrospect; just looking for more deep pockets, I'm sure). I also doubt her yacht "friends" last summer were way above the Troll category, in the looks dept.

The first guy she dated seriously after filing for divorce WAS a good-looking, cut guy who looked great playing with her on beaches. However, he had allegations of date-rape against him from his frat boy days, and if I were the single mother of a small child, I'd chew my foot off before getting involved with a man like that (whether or not denials or dropped charges attached). Looks don't mean a thing.

Sounds to me that Ramona and BF belong to the Misery Loves Company Club. I sure don't buy that they have Dorinda's interests at heart. That's a laughable idea to me.

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biakbiak, on 21 Apr 2016 - 9:58 PM, said:biakbiak, on 21 Apr 2016 - 9:58 PM, said:

The thing about the small penis talk was that it all started because Bethanny couldn't stop bitching about how the small olives in her drink. It probably threw off her entire meal plan for the day!

 

For real. She probably had an unaccounted for 30 calories to play with! Hot damn, that's like found money for a gal with orthorexic tendencies!  

Edited by Duke2801
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I'm not a fan of Bethenny, but she made me laugh many times this episode.  I actually paused and rewound just to listen again. All in all, I found most of them amusing with the exception of Drunk Dorinda, Vito Spatafore (John), and Carole.  Whoops, and Jules.

Laughing Out Loud.....so funny!!!  

Edited by TV Diva Queen
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Sheesh, I'm sick to death of looking at Bethenny's meh SoHo place.  I wanna see amazing & gigantic places --  like the one Noah & Alison moved into in The Affair.  That's what I wanna see.  At least it would be a welcome & nice break from Bethenny's never-ending nasty-ass bullshit.

 

 

Was that an actual apartment or just a set? 

 

I think Bethenny's been around and seen a lot of dysfunctional relationships, and that's what she probably sees with Dorinda and John, a big steaming pile of dysfunction.  Just because a woman has a man doesn't make her better than a woman who doesn't have a man.  I mean any woman can get into a relationship with an active alcoholic, just keep the booze flowing and pretend everything's fine.

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My guess is that John and Dorinda are one of those couples who get sloppy nasty drunk and say awful things to each other and the next day it's all forgotten. So when the camera catches her drunkenly saying that she never wants to see John again, it means nothing cuz it happens every day. Beth has one huge ego to think because he gets into a fight with her that Dorinda is going to dump him. Them getting drunk and sloppy and nasty is part of their dynamic.

Dorinda and John are Martha and George from Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf.
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Dorinda strikes me as a woman so desperately afraid of being without a man that she'll cling to John even though she clearly doesn't love him and doesn't much like him, either. And what a shame and a waste that is, too. Jules is obviously a moron and, quite frankly, a terrible homemaker and an indifferent mother. What the hell does this woman do all day? Spend hours trying to think of new ways to allude to Judaism in casual conversation? And she apparently thinks that she's younger than the other woman on the show through her own cleverness and hard work.

Did anyone else get this headline? "Your Weekly Does of SuAnn"

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I must've attended fast slut high in the early 70s, then.   :-)

Seriously. Don't know where the other person grew up but those were the days when "nice girls did" and got on the pill to avoid getting pregnant. We were the generation of girls who said yes to boys who said no to war.The 70s the sexual revolution and fun! Not everyone had sex with more than one boy you weren't serious with before graduation, but a ton did it with at least one. No herpes, no HIV/AIDS, no whatever that thing is teens get a shot now for,

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Dorinda strikes me as a woman so desperately afraid of being without a man that she'll cling to John even though she clearly doesn't love him and doesn't much like him, either. And what a shame and a waste that is, too. Jules is obviously a moron and, quite frankly, a terrible homemaker and an indifferent mother. What the hell does this woman do all day? Spend hours trying to think of new ways to allude to Judaism in casual conversation? And she apparently thinks that she's younger than the other woman on the show through her own cleverness and hard work.Did anyone else get this headline? "Your Weekly Does of SuAnn"

Andy has lumped Sonja and Lu Ann = Sue Ann. Since they have not filmed with the other howives. He does a weekly GrHeeey Gardens on them.

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Dorinda strikes me as a woman so desperately afraid of being without a man that she'll cling to John even though she clearly doesn't love him and doesn't much like him, either. And what a shame and a waste that is, too. Jules is obviously a moron and, quite frankly, a terrible homemaker and an indifferent mother. What the hell does this woman do all day? Spend hours trying to think of new ways to allude to Judaism in casual conversation? And she apparently thinks that she's younger than the other woman on the show through her own cleverness and hard work.

Did anyone else get this headline? "Your Weekly Does of SuAnn"

 

Wait, shouldn't that be, "your weekly dose of SuAnn?"

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Just look at the RHONY home page on Bravo TV website.  Look at Jules' arms next to Bethenny's arms.  And Bethenny is super stick thin already - whaaa?  WTF is Jules?  I mean what IS she?

Ok, so I went to go look and Eeeww!!

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Wait, shouldn't that be, "your weekly dose of SuAnn?"

 

That's what I was wondering, but I wasn't ruling out that maybe I was just repeatedly misreading something that made total sense to others, as written.

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Just look at the RHONY home page on Bravo TV website.  Look at Jules' arms next to Bethenny's arms.  And Bethenny is super stick thin already - whaaa?  WTF is Jules?  I mean what IS she?

 

I don't find Bethenny to be either stick thin or skinny, as folks seem to like to say of her.  We see her in a bikini often enough that it's plain that she's nothing more or less than super fit.  She doesn't look like she's starving or wasting away; she doesn't have bones protruding more than they should be; her skin and hair look healthy, and she's full of energy.  She's a small person, and she doesn't have an extra ounce of fat she doesn't need, but there's nothing about her that suggests an eating disorder.  Carol, too, is in pretty much the same shape she's been in for all of her adult life, with nothing to suggest she's anything other than naturally (luckily) slender and quite fit.  Jules, on the other hand...

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Just look at the RHONY home page on Bravo TV website. Look at Jules' arms next to Bethenny's arms. And Bethenny is super stick thin already - whaaa? WTF is Jules? I mean what IS she?

Bravo's Odd Mom Out lead actress has similar arms to Jules.

http://www.bravotv.com/odd-mom-out/season/videos/working-moms-always-find-a-way

Jules is very tall; that does make a difference in the distribution of her weight. She looks fine to me. And I agree that Bethenny's body is fit and toned and looks fabulous. I'm sure she's not happy though with that photo of herself sitting next to Jules!

Edited by sleekandchic
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Just look at the RHONY home page on Bravo TV website.  Look at Jules' arms next to Bethenny's arms.  And Bethenny is super stick thin already - whaaa?  WTF is Jules?  I mean what IS she?

 

Hungry.......

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Jukes appears to be on the show to be friends with Dorinda. Since Sonya and Luann were holding out at the beginning of the season it is obvious that they were setting the season storyline of Bethenny vs Dorinda. Dorinda really being the only one who could possibly hold her own against Bethenny for even a minute.

Dorinda is sort of conflicted because she knows if she goes against Bethenny she is fired like Kristen. But she still can't swallow her crap so she attacks. Then she takes it back. Very similar to her behavior with John. Satan Andy sees that and exploits by getting Dorinda and John wasted and then pointing them at Bethenny. Not that it takes much to get them wasted but Bethenny knows just how to light the fuse. This seems to be the dynamic.

Housewives shows have devolved to being all about teams. This years lineup so far is Bethenny, Carole and Ramona vs. Dorinda and the very weak Jules. I see Luann joining Dorinda and very possibly Sonja as well. It remains to be seen as Suann is integrated back into the mix.

Edited by Trooper York
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I'm sure she's not happy though with that photo of herself sitting next to Jules!

 

 

I don't know why she wouldn't, she looks great - her arms look fantastic.  I am no BF Superfan but this season is the best I have ever seen her look.

 

Jules looks like she needs to get hooked up to an IV.

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Seriously. Don't know where the other person grew up but those were the days when "nice girls did" and got on the pill to avoid getting pregnant. We were the generation of girls who said yes to boys who said no to war.The 70s the sexual revolution and fun! Not everyone had sex with more than one boy you weren't serious with before graduation, but a ton did it with at least one. No herpes, no HIV/AIDS, no whatever that thing is teens get a shot now for,

 

Oh, those good ole days when VD meant crabs, or an occasional (rumored) dose of the clap - twice removed, of course!  The Pill was handed out like TicTacs to Virgins, just in case. The Summer of Love (Winter, Spring & Fall, too!!!).  Kids these days are fuckin' Puritans.  :-)

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Sonja was on WWHL on Tuesday night.  Anyone else see it?  I think she said that both she and Ramona had previously dated Luanne's new guy. 

I cringe at Sonja's version of 'dating.'  Moaner?  It must have been a blip on the horizon, or is another of her "I dated him years ago" stories.

 

On Jules and Shabbat dinner - I grew up with Reform Jews, so no one did Shabbat dinners.  But I always thought this was a serious thing, not a "let's get a breadstick and speed talk through the prayers while standing in the kitchen" and then not even eating dinner?!  Did she even light a candle, or was she just holding a lit match?  Also, if they are Orthodox, wouldn't they not drive after sundown on Friday?  I can't recall right now when they arrived at the Hamptons house. 

 

I thought Luann's "house hunting" was just to give the realtor some tv time.  That first place looked so much worse than the apt. she had with the former boyfriend.  The second was nice, but no way, as others have said, she could afford that.

 

And I must have gone to a slow/boring high school, because in 1974 girls having sex in high school was not the norm.  College, yeah, lots more happening.  But part of my point about Ramona was how she always acts so holier than thou.

 

[edited to add]  I grew up in the suburbs of NYC, actually not far from where Carole grew up.  Thinking more of Moaner in high school (I'm taking one for the team here, you can all thank me later!), I think she grew up in a more rural area, around Albany?.  I went to one of the many SUNY colleges, one of the many rural ones.  I can remember learning that in those small towns, there wasn't much else to do in high school!  Maybe that's Moaner.

Edited by Mrs peel
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I'm willing to cut Jules some slack on the "elderly" comment. If she keeps making reference to them being old, then I'll revisit, but one exaggerated comment/low blow about the other women being older doesn't bother me too much... yet. It's such low-hanging fruit, it's barely an insult.

 

It wasn't a one time thing, though. She also made some comment about menopause last episode, I believe. 

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Just look at the RHONY home page on Bravo TV website.  Look at Jules' arms next to Bethenny's arms.  And Bethenny is super stick thin already - whaaa?  WTF is Jules?  I mean what IS she?

 

I just looked. Yeah, she makes Bethenny look stocky.

Edited by Pepperminty
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I don't know why she wouldn't, she looks great - her arms look fantastic.  I am no BF Superfan but this season is the best I have ever seen her look.

 

Jules looks like she needs to get hooked up to an IV.

I said that tongue in cheek because BF's identity revolves around being THE Skinny Girl. Seated next to Jules, Bethenny is not the skinniest girl in the room. I personally think that matters a lot to her. B's ongoing remarks about Jules' alleged anorexia are uncalled for, imo, and I don't believe B is commenting on weight because B is concerned about J's mental or physical health. I think B's motivation is much more personal than that.

That's just my read on the issue, and I always respect all differing opinions. :)

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I just remembered something I thought was really odd...when Dorinda made mention of the fact that Ramona was in the fourth row at Richard's funeral.  WTF???  How is that significant?  Is there a hierarchy for guests at a funeral? 

To me it was as opposed to someone who came and stood at the back and left.  It also meant she might have had eye contact with Dorinda.  The number of times Ramona has either nodded off or gotten up and left the couch during the Reunions, I was impressed Ramona wasn't sitting by the back door at the ready to bolt if she became disinterested in the service.  Chances are the service was about the departed and not Ramona.

 

Here they rope off this first couple of rows for family so I guess if you are sitting immediately behind family it is a showing of respect?

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