S04.E12: Sean's Story

[HalcyonDays]

Episode synopsis: Sean has a massive growth protruding from his side and skin so stretched it's tearing apart, forcing his mother to change both of their lifestyles before he can be approved for surgery.

 

[Brooklynista]

And here we have Billy Bobbins Part Deux. Oh Mother...look at what you have done to this man.

[CouchTater]

Is this our first truly unlikeable person this season? 

I know Sean is partly a victim to his mother's poor parenting, but he is a baby man!

[greekmom]

This has to be the saddest episode to date. Holy crap. 919 pounds!  I agree with Dr Now this is very unhealthy dynamics.   After Dr. Now sent him home the first time and I saw him eating the burger and fries I seriously face palmed. No Sean with cutting back you are not showing the doctor you can do this. You really are not fooling anyone. And mom is still being an enabler. Not just an enabler but I think deep down she encourages it as compensation for the crappy life Sean has had. Which was due to his parent’s divorce and him being a latch key kid? Please you want some low fat cheese with that whine Sean? How many kids are home alone? How many parents split?  Mom just felt guilty about it and let Sean do whatever Sean wanted. What kills me is the fact they all think that the surgery is the “magic cure” and that there is no hard work or change in their lifestyle.  Too bad Sean is so whiny. Up there with Pauline whiny. And mom is such a liar liar pants on fire when she was discussing how the diet was going when Sean went back to Dr. Now.  She needs the surgery as much as he does.  This one is one of the episodes I wish that it was more than 1 hour.  I would have loved to see if the kid actually was able to accomplish the weight loss.

[CouchTater]

When Sean had his "accident" while in the wheelchair at the hospital, and showed his mom his poop-covered hand like a child, and his mom wiped him....oh, man.  How sad and sick was that???!!!

I noticed at the end of the ep his mom was still talking to him like a baby with the "good job!" when he struggled onto their patio for some fresh air.  God, the last scene of him on the patio, standing hunched over and out of breath, was so, so sad.

[petalfrog]

Dr. Now kills me with his late-entry psychology services. Can someone correct me... I thought a psychological assessment was a requirement before bariatric surgery? Also, this guy rolls in the door and Dr. Now says "what an unhealthy dynamic between him and mom" and waits over 4 months to see a psychologist? Can someone explain the logic here to me? Why are we not having immediate and/or early intervention to give psychoeducation, teach coping skills to patient and caregiver, and to address distorted thought patterns? Also, why is a homebound patient on oxygen not getting home health services? I feel this show gives the impression that Dr. Now often fails his patients with clear psychological patterns that set them up for failure. It doesn't make Dr. Now look good. When Sean said "maybe I can get a friend" my heart broke. When I heard he hadn't been outside in 8 years it broke harder. When I heard he hadn't completed high school because of this injury I could've cried. What does he have to start his life? I hope studying for a GED was on his palm-future board!

[Brooklynista]

Who was the wheelchair in the apartment for? It looked too small for Sean and mom was mobile. She was using it as a desk chair which seemed odd.

[crazycatlady58]

This is going to sound mean and I do not mean it that way, but could it be that Sean is a little slow ? The entire time he just seemed a little chidish, even at the end cutting out the hand shapes for his goals just did not seem like something someone in their mid 20th would do. Hopefully his mom starts eating better and the both lose weight.

[junemeatcleaver]

Did I hear Dr. Now correctly when he said Sean weighed 1003 pounds?

 

This is going to sound mean and I do not mean it that way, but could it be that Sean is a little slow ?

 

I noticed he was reading what looked like one of those beginner reader books when the dietician visited the apartment.  Who knows if he was truly slow or just another way he manipulates people.

[CousinOliver]

He could be slow. I saw him as a man child, with the stupid Gameboy with him at all times (even trips to the doctor), but maybe it's beyond his control?

[Pepperminty]

I saw that book, apparently a kid's book, and was like, I hope that's in another language. Otherwise I couldn't make sense of it.

How much food is 30K calories? I'm guessing a lot and it would get expensive really quickly.

[Lightning]

They lived in Cameron Park, CA., which is about 30 miles east of Sacramento, where I live.   That apartment complex looked like a lot of Section 8 complexes in this area.   Sean probably gets disability, and mom gets something for taking care of him.   When he first rolled into the hospital driveway and everyone came out to meet him, talk to him, and get him out of the van, and he just kept playing his Game Boy (or whatever it was), I just wanted to slap him.  I agree, I think he might be a little slow or has some mental problems that limits his interaction with people.  Mom was no help, either.  Nice of the people from their church to come help them move, and even drive down to Houston with them.  And, eeewwww to the scene in the chair.  

[Paddywagon]

Whenever I watch this show I get sad but this episode was really sad. Sean's sores looked so painful! And I was absolutely cringing when he first got to the hospital and while being pushed in the wheelchair the side of his foot was dragging on the cement. Omg that must've hurt like crazy! How could someone not notice that? And the camera guy just followed filming it. *cringe*

I agree with the poster upthread that counseling started way late. He went to emergency because he thought he was having a heart attack. I think he was having a panic attack. Food is his comfort and it was being taken away so of course he'll get very anxious over that! Then Dr Now gave him a tough love talk but it seemed mis-timed. If Sean had been in counseling instead it might have helped with the anxiety and avoided a trip to the ER, and also might have helped him stay on track.

I think Sean has some kind of learning disability but also has a strong will once he sets his mind to do something. He's also a very gentle, sheltered person and he will probably need a lot of help once he ventures out into the real world.

I hope we get to see a follow-up show with him. I truly hope he has success.

[Muffyn]

In Sean’s early talking heads he said he started putting on weight because his father was mean to him.  When he spoke to the psychiatrist, he claimed it was because of his parents’ divorce.   I felt like he chose to blame the divorce because his mother was there and it was another way to try to make her feel guilty and manipulate her.  They really do have a twisted relationship.  He’s not the first person we’ve seen act like a toddler.  I hate to mention her name for fear she’ll return; the ever heinous Penny talked like a small child and threw fits much like Sean. 

 

He may be intellectually challenged.  He may also be accustomed to acting like a small child as part of his weird codependency with his mother.  If he’s a baby, she needs to take care of him.  He was similar to Penny in his absolute lack of shame.  They never discussed whether he was using his bed as a toilet or if he used the bathroom.  Wiping his ass with his hand and holding it out in the doctor’s waiting room was so disgusting.  Given how his mother wasn’t fazed at all by this, I wonder how often he does that at home. 

 

It is hard to imagine him really being successful in the long run.  It is also hard to imagine someone wanting to be his friend unless he changes dramatically.  He has a very strange way of interacting with people.  I did feel for him when his foot was dragging in the wheelchair.  They should have put something under it to keep it lifted up.  Otherwise, when people were speaking to him he would either respond by whining or would be rolling his eyes and sneering.  He really needs to mature rapidly.

Edited March 17, 2016 by Muffyn

[ChristmasJones]

I found myself wondering, near the end of the episode, if his mom really wanted him to become healthy and independent. This sounds horrible, but its just a theory- she is overweight and alone... so keeping her son housebound and eating fast food with her might be something she enjoys on some level- he provides companionship, she feels needed, she gets to have some control, she doesn't have to risk dating and being rejected by a man (or woman)...  Its all probably on a subconscious level if its even true.

 

It could also be that she just has been conditioned for so many years in this role of caretaker, that its just hard for her to break out. She needs her own therapy as much as he does.

[non sequitur]

This was horrible.  Sean and his mother need an intervention.  Why didn't Sean have physical rehab after his injury in high school?  It doesn't make sense to let someone just stay in a bed forever.

 

When Sean went to the hospital for his fake heart attack, in the next scene after the commercial his hair was much shorter than when he arrived.

Edited March 17, 2016 by non sequitur

[OhioMom]

I really didn't think  he would pull it off. But he did.  He did  have a look about him that one could decipher as him be slow, but he also spoke quite well at times -- as though he had a good command of English, and he even knitted. I can't even do that, so I'm still out on his mental capacity.

 

Why was his mom rolling around in that chair? That was bizarre. Maybe she felt she could cover more ground, faster, in it.  It was still odd.  His mom had the patience of Job with him. 

 

Watching him eat some of that food was just nauseating.  It's not wonder he never felt full -- he couldn't possibly even be tasting it, much less enjoying it.

Edited March 17, 2016 by OhioMom

[poeticlicensed]

I was cringing during the entire episode. Talk about codependency. I am always intrigued when the person providing the food claims that it's the only thing that gives the obese person pleasure so now they are stuck. Well OK but that thing is also killing them. I think mom was subconsciously trying to keep him home until it got out of control then she threw up her hands. My guess is that mom taught him to knit. She is lucky Sean isn't a minor because that situation warranted cps intervention.

Oh the whining and crying. And mom saying that when your child asks for food you give it to him. Wtf? Hes 26 not 6!!

Mom knew damn well what she was supposed to be feeding Sean but he whined. So she gave in. Ugh so frustrating.

The psychologist was laughable. Of the Stewart Smalley variety. "I'm good enough smart enough and gosh darn it people like me".

I suspect that hygiene was a big issue. I can't even imagine the smell. I did notice lots of dandruff perpetually on his shirt. And he was in dire need of dental work.

When they were doing the goal board at the end, the two things they wanted when he reached his goal weight were to go to a big amusement park (I.e. Disney) or a cruise. Ack! Do not take Sean on a cruise. It's 24 hour a day food. At least at Disney you are forced to walk around and the entire day doesn't revolve around eating. I'm not dissing cruises, I cruise a lot but there is a heavy focus on food and drink.

Edited March 17, 2016 by poeticlicensed

[cynicat]

And this is why I could never be a health care worker--I honestly didn't care if Sean made it.  When he kept crying and complaining about how it was so unfair of everyone to make him cut calories, and that he should be allowed to enjoy his food, all I thought was "go ahead, keep eating all that shit".  I was almost hoping Dr. Now would stop trying and let this whiny manipulative jerk eat himself into oblivion.

Save the surgery for someone who really wants to change.  My reservation in hell now confirmed.

[Granny58]

Although I don't think it applies in every situation, I wondered in this family if there is an actual serotonin deficiency.  Sean IMMEDIATELY felt better (he said, when young) after eating and so kept it up.  If I understand Internet University at all, some foods cause a release of serotonin, which is the anti-depression/anxiety hormone.  Instead of turning to food, I wonder if Sean and those like him would be better off taking 5-HTP.  I wouldn't recommend an antidepressant since they often pack on the pounds, but 5-HTP does not.  Please note - if anyone reading this is on an antidepressant or other serotonin-increasing agent (which includes some meds other than antidepressants) please do NOT take 5-HTP as it could lead to serotonin syndrome (uncomfortable at least, deadly at worst).  I would like this series to have longer episodes....I want to find out how things go.   

[Pepper Mostly]

I found myself wondering, near the end of the episode, if his mom really wanted him to become healthy and independent. This sounds horrible, but its just a theory- she is overweight and alone... so keeping her son housebound and eating fast food with her might be something she enjoys on some level- he provides companionship, she feels needed, she gets to have some control, she doesn't have to risk dating and being rejected by a man (or woman)...  Its all probably on a subconscious level if its even true.

 

It could also be that she just has been conditioned for so many years in this role of caretaker, that its just hard for her to break out. She needs her own therapy as much as he does.

This was my response also. Mama was just dying to "help" Sean by "letting him have a treat". They were co-conspirators and their stories fit together seamlessly. She didn't want to lose weight or give up her "treats", which she'd have to do if Sean did. They gave me the creeps. The way kept whining about wanting his "own home and his own bed"! He didn't want to put in the work, and seemed not to understand that your body doesn't care if you don't think its fair that you can't have ice cream and pizza and cheeseburgers! Its going to lay in that fat if you keep pounding down that food!

 

And yes, he was like like a child in every way. That reward chart with the handprints? I cringed.

[OSM Mom]

He kept whining that he wanted the surgery. It was like he thought that if he had the surgery, he could keep shoveling in 30,000 a day, and somehow, miraculously, he would get down to 150. Yeah.. Whiney little snot. That's not how it works.

[Barb23]

And this is why I could never be a health care worker--I honestly didn't care if Sean made it.  When he kept crying and complaining about how it was so unfair of everyone to make him cut calories, and that he should be allowed to enjoy his food, all I thought was "go ahead, keep eating all that shit".  I was almost hoping Dr. Now would stop trying and let this whiny manipulative jerk eat himself into oblivion.

Save the surgery for someone who really wants to change.  My reservation in hell now confirmed.

Make that two reservations. I was thinking same thing - give the surgery to someone who realizes what surgery & weight loss entails. I don't see him succeeding. As soon as he sees a pizza, he'll be doomed. No way does he or Mom have willpower to Just Say No.

Some observations: I agree with their apartment had to be one smelly place. He had to use the bed as a bathroom when he weighed so much. I don't think a toilet or bedside commode would hold him plus there's the logistics of getting his huge frame in a bathroom. They showed him scooting to end of bed & peeing in a plastic wash basin on the floor (& then calling for his mother like a 5 yr old.) I can't imagine how they handled his bowel movements (which had to be ginormous considering how much food went in.) If they needed two persons to move him around to give him a sponge bath, how did Mom attempt to clean him by herself after a bowel movement? Sorry, don't mean to be so gross, but these are daily issues & wonder how they are dealt with with a person that size.

Dr Now should have ordered a psychiatric evaluation as soon as he saw Sean playing on his Game boy & not paying a bit of attention to Dr Now. I laughed when Sean stopped & said he couldn't go further & Dr Now announced that was fine, he would examine him in the hallway waiting room.

Like we always wonder, how do they get the money to live? Fast food isn't cheap, especially the quantities they were inhaling daily. Did we ever see Mom cooking anything? I'm on disability & my monthly amount is based on how long I worked & what kind of job I did. Hence the phrase You have to give something to get something in return. I don't see Sean getting disability since he never worked & if he did, he wouldn't get much, if any, cuz he would have only worked for a few years. Mom may be a different story since she had worked but still don't know how they could live on that alone.

I questioned Sean's health issues too.. Why didn't he get the proper care so his foot injury healed properly? I'm almost positive you need a doctor's orders & follow up care with the oxygen. I say this each week but it amazes me he wasn't covered with bed sores from constantly laying in one position in bed for that long of a time (not to mention how clean that area is kept.) Same thing goes with blood clots from him barely moving. Last year I developed a pulmonary embolism from being ridden for about two weeks with the stomach flu. I did get up to go to bathroom & get things. These people barely move for years & nothing happens to them. Life isn't fair sometimes.

I seem to be more interested in Sean's story than others cuz he is the same age as my son. My son (who was also a latch key kid) has gotten so far in his life & wonder what Sean's life would have been like without the weight issue & codependency of Mom.. Not being mean but Sean & his Mom would be a great psychology thesis for someone. This episode definitely needs a follow-up. Like the others, I hope he succeeds but don't see it happening.

[operalover]

Who knows? Yes to Barb 23- I agree with all of these things you mention in your post. Millions of kids parents get divorced and they are FINE! talk about a weak backstory. I do feel for those that were sexually or physically abused and then get fat. To get SSI you have to fill out a lot of paper work and send in doctor reports. So why didn't anyone fix the foot? I agree the mom enjoyed having him there in bed, and secretly like him getting worse and worse and more dependent on her. And he enjoyed lying in his bed and eating so much that he didn't care that he had sores, couldn't breathe and had to have people wipe his ass. He kept saying "I want to get back to my bed"- I had the flu last month and I did secretly kind of enjoy taking a vacation from my life, lying on the couch, eating snacks and watching TV. It was so nice that I didn't want to get better! I think that is how it started, he was sick, the mom took care of him, brought him snacks and he was "This is the Life!" and she never attempted to help him cause she enjoyed it too- co-dependence in a nutshell. My son is also the same age- my son is mentally disabled and gets SSI. It was not easy to get, you have to prove a disability. I just wonder that due to his attitude that all the professionals just said "Oh screw you" and that his mom blocked any real help. It's the only explanation.

 

1000 pounds and still in denial! We really need a follow up. I didn't see that Mom had lost one pound. I was stunned that he gained weight when he was sent home. I think they eat 30,000 calories a day and they think going to 20,000 is "trying". I did find the 800 calorie diet to be ridiculous though. dont they normally put them on 1200? I can lose weight on 1800 a day and I weigh 140 so even if he was allowed 2500 a day he would lose- his basal metabolic rate uses more than that per day. I think 800 was going to cause constant hunger. I didn't understand that - it is starvation mode. 

Edited March 17, 2016 by operalover

[islandgal140]

Wow.. that was just .... Wow!

 

I don't think I will be eating pizza for a while. I can't believe he ate the whole thing and then ate his mom's too. 

 

I questioned Sean's health issues too.. Why didn't he get the proper care so his foot injury healed properly? 

 

That was driving me nuts!! According to him, he injured his foot during a fall in HS 8 years ago and has been bed bound every since. That foot looked horrific! I felt bad but I really wanted them to cover it with the blanket because it was just so disturbing to look at. I was surprised he could put any weight on that foot at all. Did he not get any medical attention for it at all? Now that would be negligent! 

 

What a sad lonely life. He really was just existing, not living! 

 

Those were some truly good church friends! 

[poeticlicensed]

1000 pounds and still in denial! We really need a follow up. I didn't see that Mom had lost one pound. I was stunned that he gained weight when he was sent home. I think they eat 30,000 calories a day and they think going to 20,000 is "trying". I did find the 800 calorie diet to be ridiculous though. dont they normally put them on 1200? I can lose weight on 1800 a day and I weigh 140 so even if he was allowed 2500 a day he would lose- his basal metabolic rate uses more than that per day. I think 800 was going to cause constant hunger. I didn't understand that - it is starvation mode.

 

Mr Poetic, who BTW, is horrified by the show and more horrified by the fact that I watched it, asked me what an 800 calorie diet looked like, while watching him inhale an entire pizza and ask for more. I said an 800 calorie diet is likely one egg for breakfast along with a bit of grain (toast or cereal). Lunch would be a salad with a bit of protein and tiny bit of dressing, plus fruit. Dinner would be a boneless skinless chicken breast baked with no oils, fresh veggies with no butter or fat and a little bit of fruit or a sugar free jello. Period. So yeah, I'm sure Sean was freaking out over how little food he was getting

 

I thought it was very telling that when the nutritionist came over and looked in the fridge,Mom pulled out a huge container of cut apples, the kind you buy for little kids. Just another thing to treat Sean like a baby, buy him kids stuff. Also, fruit is full of sugar. Sugar is sugar whether you get it from a bag or a from an apple. And apples are full of carbs too. There are much healthier fruit choices to be made. Again, Dr. Now said he gave her the diet, yet she claims ignorance of what he should be eating. Twisted. 

[junemeatcleaver]

 

I don't see Sean getting disability since he never worked

 

Sean is most likely on SSI not Social Security Disability people get if they worked for X amount of years.  And he probably would  be on SSI even if he wasn't 900 plus pounds.  What type of work would he get that he's qualified to do (manual labor) with that leg and his, real or not, intellectual disability?

[poeticlicensed]

 

Sean is most likely on SSI not Social Security Disability people get if they worked for X amount of years.  And he probably would  be on SSI even if he wasn't 900 plus pounds.  What type of work would he get that he's qualified to do (manual labor) with that leg and his, real or not, intellectual disability?

If he is on SSI, plus the oxygen tank, that must mean he is  under a doctor's care. In order to claim SSI, the claim has to be substantiated with regular doctor's reports. I know lots of docs don't want to take on weight related stuff, other than to say you need to lose a few pounds, but in this case I have a hard time believing any doctor wouldn't be pitching a fit over Sean and his weight and just continue to sign off on reports. 

Edited March 17, 2016 by poeticlicensed

[petalfrog]

 

Wiping his ass with his hand and holding it out in the doctor’s waiting room was so disgusting.

I didn't see any fecal matter on his hand. I thought he actually touched the pad below him and it was wet with urine. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he did not have much sensation to tell if he's gone to the bathroom without touching a pad.

 

 

I said an 800 calorie diet is likely one egg for breakfast along with a bit of grain (toast or cereal). Lunch would be a salad with a bit of protein and tiny bit of dressing, plus fruit. Dinner would be a boneless skinless chicken breast baked with no oils, fresh veggies with no butter or fat and a little bit of fruit or a sugar free jello.

Yeh,... when he was eating that burger and fries after getting the 800 calories diet and he said "I don't even know what 800 calories looks like" I thought... what you're putting in your mouth right now is 800 calories or more so that's all you get today (even though obviously they don't want the 800 calories to be loaded with cholesterol and sodium). I also don't see why he can't just eat carrots and celery all day if he feels the urge to put food in his mouth. I agree 800 calories is a starvation diet and surely at some point in the timeline the body then starts hoarding weight before you drop it? Also, was there any mention of health issues? Diabetes? Hypertension? Etc.? Everything about how Dr. Now runs his practice frustrates me so I don't know why I watch this show!

Edited March 17, 2016 by petalfrog

[Ocean Chick]

Wow - that mom was just something else, without even talking about her son.  Her excuse - when a child says they're hungry, you feed him if you love him - was rank.  My mom loved me enough to tell me "you have to wait until meal time to eat" when I whined that I was hungry between meals.  We had 3 well regulated meals that were home made and contained fruits and vegetables in proper proportions.  That's love, not greasy, salty fast food and junk food.  And yes, I think part of what was going on in mom's mind was to keep him fat enough to keep him separated from the world that might make fun of his emotional, if not intellectual, disability.  And probably ensure that she had company until she died.

 

I don't think Sean will ever "get" it.  I'm not seeing him hit goal weight or staying there any time soon.  But maybe he'll at least get rid of enough weight to take care of himself once mom passes.

[flappa1016]

 did find the 800 calorie diet to be ridiculous though. dont they normally put them on 1200? I can lose weight on 1800 a day and I weigh 140 so even if he was allowed 2500 a day he would lose- his basal metabolic rate uses more than that per day. I think 800 was going to cause constant hunger. I didn't understand that - it is starvation mode. 

This.  The amount of calories he needs just to fuel basic bodily functions like respiration, heart rate and the like would be a fairly high number, even if he doesn't move from the bed much.  At my highest weight (320), I was eating 2500 calories per day and losing weight - my BMR was something like 3500 calories per day.  And that was a sedentary lifestyle (desk job and no exercise other than daily walking) I was able to lose 80 lbs.

And thumbs up to the nutritionist that called him out on the pasta and apples - people mistakenly think that fruit is a good choice for people losing weight.  They don't call fruit "nature's candy" for no reason.  Does it confer some health benefits?  Sure.  Does it help with weight loss - not for someone of that weight - the sugar in the fruit/starch is keeping his insulin levels constantly elevated (insulin being the fat storage hormone) and screwing with his leptin/grehlin (sp?) levels - those are the hormones that control hunger and satiety.  Carrots were a sketchy alternative to the apples, as they are starchy.  I would have gone with some low sugar fruits, like strawberries/raspberries/blackberries, if one insists on eating fruits.  I live with two T2 diabetics (and I was pre-diabetic before my weight loss) and low sugar fruits (as a once in a while treat) are the only fruits that we can tolerate without jacking our glucose levels.  And we always restrict it to no more than half a cup, and always with a fat to blunt the sugar impact.  Heavy cream poured over berries is divine!!!  Or mixed into plain, unsweetened full fat greek yogurt.

He would feel a lot more satiated if he ate some fat with those foods.  Nothing wrong with having some butter on those vegetables or cooking an egg or two in some bacon grease or coconut oil.

And lastly, his assertion that he had no idea what foods constituted what number of calories??  BS, BS, BS!!  I'm sure he and his mom were given written instructions on the types and amounts of food to eat (and Dr. Now confirmed this during one of his repeat hospitalizations).  They had internet access, and there are multiple calorie counting apps out there:  LoseIt!, My Fitness Pal, Fat Secret, etc.  No excuse for that kind of denial.

Anyone else notice the eczema/psoriasis he had going on all over his face at one point.  Completely gone by the time he was discharged from the hospital.  I'm thinking that taking away his access to processed foods and grains made a world of difference to his improved skin condition.

[junemeatcleaver]

If he is on SSI, plus the oxygen tank, that must mean he is  under a doctor's care. In order to claim SSI, the claim has to be substantiated with regular doctor's reports. I know lots of docs don't want to take on weight related stuff, other than to say you need to lose a few pounds, but in this case I have a hard time believing any doctor wouldn't be pitching a fit over Sean and his weight and just continue to sign off on reports. 

 

Or he could be on SSI for his intellectual disability.  I don't know, and I don't want to speculate further.

 

I'm beginning to believe that Sean really is slow.  We've seen the patients on this show who live with their parents, and even had kind of creepy co-dependent relationships with them, who seemed to function on a higher level than Sean even if they were immature and childish.  Sean just wasn't immature, he used his tablet and kiddie book to disconnect from the world like a lot of kids do when they don't want to hear something.

 

In any case, he needs serious mental help and time away from dear old mom.

Edited March 17, 2016 by junemeatcleaver

[ClareWalks]

I saw that book, apparently a kid's book, and was like, I hope that's in another language. Otherwise I couldn't make sense of it.

How much food is 30K calories? I'm guessing a lot and it would get expensive really quickly.

 

30,000 calories is 20 Big Mac value meals with Coke a day. At least. It is an ASTONISHING amount of food.

 

I hated this guy so much. What a whiny little shit. His mother was no better either, with her smirking during Dr. Now's "come to Jesus" talk. It blows my mind how people can be so ignorant of nutrition that they think 30,000 calories is actually 1,500. It's TWENTY TIMES MORE.

[poeticlicensed]

30,000 calories is 20 Big Mac value meals with Coke a day. At least. It is an ASTONISHING amount of food

 

I did a little math. Burger and fires of that size is an easy 2500 calories, an entire large pizza is about 4000, a liter of soda is 800-1000 calories. They never talked about soda, but I'm guessing he was putting a half dozen 2 liters away daily. And remember that he said that he ate 2-3 burgers at a sitting, so triple the 2500. He also ate a whole pizza but I'm speculating her probably eats 2, so all that alone would be around 20,000. He had bags of junk next to his bed, and he was eating a bag of cheese ruffles. He probably eats a few bags  a day. Add in a few donuts in the morning and you are at 30,000. Crazy, just crazy

[MrsChappy]

I truly hope Dr Now doesn't run his practice the way it is portrayed on the show. I have to think there is much more counseling vs. these brief visits we see. I've known a few people IRL who've had bypass and had to go through a variety of physical testing and psychological evaluation. One family member was denied surgery based on her psych evaluation. She later moved to another state and received the surgery there. It didn't work for her.

[rab01]

This is the first time I've ever watched this show and it will also be the last but ... I could not turn away for a moment while watching it. It was seriously compelling.

 

Sean's diction and vocabulary sounded highly functioning but his self-awareness and sense of responsibility seemed child-like so I think mentally disturbed more than mentally delayed.  And, obviously, anyone who overeats to the point of becoming bed-ridden has serious mental issues.

 

I feel a bit of sympathy for the mom. Yes, all us parents are responsible to some degree for what happens to our kids but we can't control all of it. Maybe she could have found a way to prevent Sean from spiraling down so far but we have no idea how they got to this place. By the time we see them, she's been dealing with him on bed rest for over 6 years and is at the end of her rope.  I don't think there was much left of her.

 

The diet was actually the strangest part of the episode. I liked the doctor except for his pretended insistence on an 800-calorie diet. At 1,000 (or "even" 700) pounds, wouldn't Sean lose weight rapidly on a 5,000 calorie diet?  Also, given his size, eating some apple slices aren't really going to hurt him, eating a couple of bags of apple slices would be the problem. Apples' glycemic index is very similar to carrots actually. Speaking from personal experience, I dieted a year ago and lost a bunch of weight (from obese to normal on the BMI scale) while eating a couple apples a day.

 

Yeesh, now to get some brain bleach to get the visuals of Sean out of my head.

[Brooklynista]

I did a little math. Burger and fires of that size is an easy 2500 calories, an entire large pizza is about 4000, a liter of soda is 800-1000 calories. They never talked about soda, but I'm guessing he was putting a half dozen 2 liters away daily. And remember that he said that he ate 2-3 burgers at a sitting, so triple the 2500. He also ate a whole pizza but I'm speculating her probably eats 2, so all that alone would be around 20,000. He had bags of junk next to his bed, and he was eating a bag of cheese ruffles. He probably eats a few bags  a day. Add in a few donuts in the morning and you are at 30,000. Crazy, just crazy

 

 

I want to vomit just reading that!  Ugh!

 

The one thing that gets me is...he's a 20 something year old man!  Don't you want to drive across country?  Hang out and get beers w the fellas??  Chase some tail??  Is life really that room, a bag (or 6) of Cheetos, and Old Mother Hubbard???

 

Where's the want to get out there??  Or has mom suppressed all of that with Live with Me Forever Burgers?

 

 

Also, didn't Sean say he started packing on weight at 10?  Even before the divorce or accident?  To me that says that mom was overfeeding him all along.  Perhaps as she saw her marriage ending, she started to cripple Sean so she would have someone to always love her.

Edited March 17, 2016 by Brooklynista

[jcbrown]

Save the surgery for someone who really wants to change.  My reservation in hell now confirmed.

Make that two reservations. I was thinking same thing - give the surgery to someone who realizes what surgery & weight loss entails. I don't see him succeeding. As soon as he sees a pizza, he'll be doomed. No way does he or Mom have willpower to Just Say No.

Save me a seat, too. I watched him eat with disgusted fascination. I have never seen anyone shove a piece of pizza into their face in just two bites. Agreed there is something seriously off with this kid but that did nothing to keep me from wanting to slap him. Repeatedly.

Edited March 17, 2016 by jcbrown

[mmecorday]

I think the mother intentionally kept Sean fat so he couldn't kill her and and wear her clothes. Seriously, there was such a Norman-Norma Bates thing going on with these two.

[ethalfrida]

Why do they lie when asked how many calories they've been eating? Most people know 2500 calories a day will not get you to a ton in weight.

 

And, as a parent, his mom had an obligation to say "no, you have had enough" and shoo him off to go and play somewhere. That is in general speaking. Poor guy did not ever get a chance to bond and interact with people his age. But the sad part, which made me not even want to criticize him any more was watching him eat. It looked like if he could he would shovel food into his mouth 24/7. That's what he was doing, just shoving it in and then he asked for some of his mom's. Two or three pieces, he said. That's when it became evident that he was indeed suffering from some type of disorder. I am not sure the operation was right for him. I am still just too sad for that young man. And... his mom is slow too.

Edited March 17, 2016 by ethalfrida

[islandgal140]

I did a little math. Burger and fires of that size is an easy 2500 calories, an entire large pizza is about 4000, a liter of soda is 800-1000 calories. They never talked about soda, but I'm guessing he was putting a half dozen 2 liters away daily. And remember that he said that he ate 2-3 burgers at a sitting, so triple the 2500. He also ate a whole pizza but I'm speculating her probably eats 2, so all that alone would be around 20,000. He had bags of junk next to his bed, and he was eating a bag of cheese ruffles. He probably eats a few bags  a day. Add in a few donuts in the morning and you are at 30,000. Crazy, just crazy

 

Thank you for this. This also made me think of how little we know about the participants daily food intake, which I just find fascinating and mind boggling. Watching Sean inhale 2 pizzas was just too damn much! Frankly, I would rather the show skip the mandatory 'let's see a morbidly obese naked person' shower of shame and just show me their typical food day complete with calorie count. Dr. Now's you must be consuming 30k calories to maintain this weight just doesn't cut it. Show, don't tell. Food bills must be astronomical! So much fast food. 

Edited March 17, 2016 by islandgal140

[Granny58]

I truly hope Dr Now doesn't run his practice the way it is portrayed on the show. I have to think there is much more counseling vs. these brief visits we see. I've known a few people IRL who've had bypass and had to go through a variety of physical testing and psychological evaluation. One family member was denied surgery based on her psych evaluation. She later moved to another state and received the surgery there. It didn't work for her

agree, there's no way this practice is run the way we see it.  It has to be condensed for the show.  I wish we had 2 hours though...I want to see what happens.  

Edited March 17, 2016 by Granny58

[Hero]

The way he would cry/whine whenever he didn't want to do something was disturbing.

I flip-flopped on disliking him and feeling sorry for him. But, he is a master manipulator and has obviously been doing it for a long time.

[ChristmasJones]

Ok, so I used this little calculator to figure out how many calories per day Sean could eat and still lose weight. 

http://www.health-calc.com/diet/energy-expenditure-advanced

 

The calculator's upper limit on weight is 550lbs, so I did 550lbs, 5'10" and I estimated that he sleeps 8 hours per day and then stays in bed the rest of the day.   To maintain that weight, while being completely sedentary, he would have to eat 6182 cal per day. 

 

To maintain 350lbs and be totally sedentary, he would have to eat 2000 cal per day less- 4181

[Pepper Mostly]

He doesn't even know how to interact with people, he's been in bed playing games and knitting for so long. He's so emotionally stunted he can't think past his dear old mom for companionship, and his bed for his world. It would be sad if it wasn't so creepy.

[Carolina Girl]

And this is why I could never be a health care worker--I honestly didn't care if Sean made it.  When he kept crying and complaining about how it was so unfair of everyone to make him cut calories, and that he should be allowed to enjoy his food, all I thought was "go ahead, keep eating all that shit".  I was almost hoping Dr. Now would stop trying and let this whiny manipulative jerk eat himself into oblivion.

Save the surgery for someone who really wants to change.  My reservation in hell now confirmed.

 

No worries - I've just confirmed the room next door.  I had absolutely NO sympathy for this guy.  NONE.  Especially when you have the examples we've had this season of people who had suffered far serious psychological trauma (I believe several of the women were sexually molested), with greater demands on their time, but were still able to listen to Dr. Now's advice and do the work.  But Mr. "Poor Me" was all "why is everyone so MEAN to me?"  You weigh half a ton!  Not only that, you put 100 pounds on AFTER Dr. Now told you to lose 150, yet you insisted you were cutting back.  

[littlemommy]

Whooooo, boy. That was a crazy one.

Before I did social work I was a home health care aide. I think the only reason he didn't have terrible skin breakdown is because he is still young. In fact, the only reason he lived through any of it was probably because he is still young. 5 or 10 more years and everything would've gone quite differently.

As everyone noted, very strange mother son dynamic. Unless I missed something, he is an only child. Obviously a spoiled one. Even is he is slow, he was infantilixed by the mother. I'm half surprised she didn't call the thing in his leg a "booboo". And what kind of parent gets her kid almost all the way through high school and lets them quit because of a hurt leg? I'd be like "I'll get a you a wheelchair and wheel you from class to class my damn SELF!" before I'd let that fly. His life chances were being limited right then, before being bedbound. It makes me wonder if he was bullied or something in high school and the injury was an easy reason to escape that environment (and also to burrow into his bed and never leave).

[notyrmomma]

See, I picked up a little (well, a lot) of Kathy Bates from The Water Boy in the mom.  I think she wanted him to stay 1,000 lbs and bed bound forever so she didn't have to be alone.  And Sean was really a lot like Adam Sandler's character, he didn't know any better and acted like a kid well into his adulthood because I bet his mother mostly kept him away from people.   (OMG, I can't believe that I would every use a Sandler movie to discuss real life family dysfunction! LOL)  But sadly, I don't think either of them will come around and Sean will be dead in a couple years.

 

Add me to the chorus who thinks an 800 calorie diet is dumb...unless it was a liquid diet.  It's psychologically a lot easier to drink four 200 calorie nutrition shakes a day than it is to try to string together three meals with 800 calories.  I had to do the liquid fast (800 - 1000 cals) before my bariatric surgery and after the first three days, I wasn't even feeling hungry anymore.

 

Anyway, I think I despised this kid more than Pauline and Marla combined (Penny is in her own class).  I kept yelling at my screen "what a little bitch."  I can't stand it when someone goes out of their way to help a person and when that person doesn't exert any effort to participate in the process.

Edited March 17, 2016 by notyrmomma

[operalover]

Just to clear up the SSI thing- you do NOT have to be disabled to get SSI (supplemental security income) you just have to be poor with no assets or money in the bank. People confuse it with SSD but also SSI goes to disabled people with no assets.

 

These are federal cash benefits. You may be eligible if:

1.  You are disabled. SSI has the same disability standard as SSD.

2.  You are “poor”. You are poor if your monthly income is not greater than $500 a month, and you have no savings or other assets worth more than $2000.

 

So perhaps there was no doctor involved in declaring the 2 of them disabled. They may each get $700 a month in SSI and be in Section 8 housing. If they have very few other bills, I would say they can spend $30 a day on fast food. She may have some retirement. But if he has NOTHING -no savings and does not own anything, he can collect once he is 18 without proving disability. It kind of overlaps because my son is mentally disabled from birth and can't work, yet he also has to be shown to be poor to collect it, and have no assets or savings.

 

The mother was a real liar. Her whole "I have to say he is having more than 800, even 1400 some days, and he had one slice of pizza and a donut this month"!! ha ha ha if that were true he would have lost another 100 pounds not gained another 100 pounds! Dr. NA did state that a person who weighs so much, has to eat an awful lot to sustain that weight and to gain weight. The 30,000 calories a day, day after day. I cannot imagine the bowel movements - how nasty and who's job is it to clean that up? I mean once babies get on people food and get to be older it is tough changing diapers. My (disabled) son was nearly 5 and still in diapers and it was gross.  And he was a little guy. Imagine a 1000 pound man bowels movements who eats 30,000 calories a day of fastfood?

Edited March 17, 2016 by operalover

[Cherrio]

I found myself wondering, near the end of the episode, if his mom really wanted him to become healthy and independent. This sounds horrible, but its just a theory- she is overweight and alone... so keeping her son housebound and eating fast food with her might be something she enjoys on some level- he provides companionship, she feels needed, she gets to have some control, she doesn't have to risk dating and being rejected by a man (or woman)...  Its all probably on a subconscious level if its even true.

 

It could also be that she just has been conditioned for so many years in this role of caretaker, that its just hard for her to break out. She needs her own therapy as much as he does.

I stopped at your post and also want to include Brooklynista's too.   Yes, its Billy Robbins 2.0.   This mom does want to keep him immobile and dependent just like Billy's mom.  Combined with his addiction and his upbringing he probably has a slim chance of a normal life,     The mom clearly did not even try to restrict his diet after how many tries?   Its too bad a teacher or neighbor did not intervene on his behalf when he was a child.  She is guilty of abuse. He should of been removed from her home.  Her goal is to keep him bed bound, then become the permanent mother in mourning after he dies.

             I almost heaved during the accident scene and also the part where she head butts herself in between two layer of fat when they were washing him.

                            I agree with everyone else about where the hell was the therapist before, way before?     He needs intensive therapy and it should of been required he live apart from his mother.    He has to grow up at some point, sooner rather than later and understand his mother is always going to try and sabotage any effort he makes, that it if he can make any real effort.