S05.E17: Forgive & Forget

[NikSac]

Speaking of ridiculous nicknames, where did "Tootie Fruity" come from?  And just plain "Tootie?"  Have I been tuning those two out, why have I never heard Cate call her Tootie before?  

 

I was wondering about that too!  I still think Tootie is better than Booger Butt, but it's still kind of weird that this nickname seemingly came out of nowhere. In my mind I keep picturing Nova having a poopy diaper, Tyler (with full Butch facial expressions) going "she made a Tootie!" while handing her off to Cate - or April. Clearly I've thought about this too much.

My water bill comes to my email and it usually comes out not long after my last month bill was due.  So she probably saw it in her email.

 

...but Farrah doesn't get a "bill."  She gets "invoices."  Sorry that just annoyed the heck out of me.

 

(and my water usage is always about 2 months behind on the bill, so I too had a hard time believing she got it while she was on vacation - er - on business, but maybe other areas are different)

[luvly]

I have no problem believing Catelynn suffers from depression and anxiety. I knew someone similar, addict parents and barely graduated HS due to constantly moving because her mom blew the rent money on drugs/bail. She thought she’d be fine after she went away to college, but being in a relatively stable environment brought all her issues to the surface. When you're in survival mode and eating beefaroni out of the can in the dark because the utility money went to meth, your feelings are low on the list. It took her a long time and a lot of therapy to accept that neglect is a form of abuse and that she’d been abused for most of her life.

 

I think a big part of Catelynn’s problem is that she’s “forgiven” April and Butch, but has really only buried the issues. She’s talked about having one of April’s boyfriends pin her down and choke her, another one’s dealer threatening to kill their family, doing all kind of drugs in junior high, seeing Butch smoke crack right in front of her and her siblings, etc. And yet, she thinks she was a happy child and teenager. That’s someone in denial about how fucked up their life has been. Deep down, she knows the source of her anxiety but I don't think she's prepared to deal with what'll come up if she starts digging. Acknowledging that the adults in her life failed her tremendously means she might have to cut some people out of her life. She’d also have to confront her feelings of maternal inadequacy (and I do believe that’s part of what’s going on with her) due to the lackluster example she had for herself.

 

One of the reasons I find her story one of the most fascinating is because the intersection of poverty and addiction is usually the background in which teen pregnancy is set and it doesn't always get better with more resources. You can throw all the money in the world at a problem, but if you don’t have the fundamental tools to even understand the problem, it’s incredibly difficult to persevere.

[ghoulina]

Ha Ha -- it would serve her right if someone from the camera crew "accidentally" turned the water on in a sink in an unused bathroom and let it run forever.  MTV should make her use a porta-potty on the street outside the studio next time she shows up for the taping of an after show or reunion show.

 

I think they should move the porta-potty into her bedroom while she's gone. They can say they got a note from the HOA that it was upsetting the other residents of her neighborhood. 

 

And I wouldn't worry too much about that weight gain. Tyler is a chip off the old block, and we know how much Butch likes them thick chicks. Who, by the way, are probably baby gooping up your sheets right now while you LEFT BUTCH ALONE IN YOUR HOUSE. For a freaking week. WTF?

 

I have nightmares thinking about what's going on in that house while they're in Hawaii. Burn all the prison sock puppets when you get back!!!

[gunderda]

...but Farrah doesn't get a "bill."  She gets "invoices."  Sorry that just annoyed the heck out of me.

 

(and my water usage is always about 2 months behind on the bill, so I too had a hard time believing she got it while she was on vacation - er - on business, but maybe other areas are different)

 

huh?  An invoice is the same thing as a bill.  I don't call it a water invoice, I call it my water bill. 

when my parents stay at my house, they are usually here for a week and obviously the water usage goes up slightly - I always see it on my next bill after they leave, which is usually a month later.   She was gone for a month, the call with Deb seemed to be right before she flew back.

Edited February 11, 2016 by gunderda

[CofCinci]

I have nightmares thinking about what's going on in that house while they're in Hawaii. Burn all the prison sock puppets when you get back!!!

Does anyone remember during the drunken, multigenerational co-bachelor/bachelorette party how April and Dawn waxed nostalgic about how much fun it was with Butch (when he wasn't beating them)? I would not be surprised if April and Butch bumped uglies while C&T were away.

Also, what it is with that gang's obsession with Batman? April's new husband/soon-to-be-exhusband was wearing a Batman logo bucket hat.

[Booger666]

Regarding the water bill this may add some context - I'm in N TX and a lot of cities had subsidized water increases for years and then suddently stopped to fund infrastructure improvements. In my city my bill went up by 50% and in the news they reported some doubled. Not sure if this happened in Austin, but the timing would have been about right. That and a broken sprinkler head, which is not Deb's fault, would explain the increase. I get my bills by email about 4 days after the meter read.

We've been talking a lot about Cate's body but Farrah's is more WTF to me. I think it's because she had so much work done so young. Things have shifted and she's gained weight and she looks very lumpy and weird to me. I think that's why she doesn't wear pants anymore. If she had jeans on you would immediately see she does not have a nice figure anymore. Her boobs have fallen and that combined with the lumpiness makes her body look like old lady to me.

[lezlers]

Ha Ha -- it would serve her right if someone from the camera crew "accidentally" turned the water on in a sink in an unused bathroom and let it run forever.  MTV should make her use a porta-potty on the street outside the studio next time she shows up for the taping of an after show or reunion show.

 

OMG that would be AMAZING.  I forgot about her making the crew use a porta potty.  God, she is the WORST.   It's almost like she's trying to see horrible she can be.

[gunderda]

We've been talking a lot about Cate's body but Farrah's is more WTF to me. I think it's because she had so much work done so young. Things have shifted and she's gained weight and she looks very lumpy and weird to me. I think that's why she doesn't wear pants anymore. If she had jeans on you would immediately see she does not have a nice figure anymore. Her boobs have fallen and that combined with the lumpiness makes her body look like old lady to me.

 

Didn't she get butt implants too?  Probably hard to find pants that actually fit (not that she can't afford a tailor).

[FlowerofCarnage]

Finally got around to watching the episode and I swear, watching Ryan and Bentley interact, it's like Bentley is Larry and Jen's surprise, later in life child and Ryan is his older brother.

[CofCinci]

Finally got around to watching the episode and I swear, watching Ryan and Bentley interact, it's like Bentley is Larry and Jen's surprise, later in life child and Ryan is his older brother.

Yes. They're brothers and not father-son. Originally, I thought that Ryan had difficulty bonding with the infant/toddler and that as Bentley became older their relationship would develop -- but I was wrong. Ryan is still a 16-year-old. When he's forced to do anything with/for Bentley, he acts like that spoiled 16-year-old who is pissed that he has to take the trash out. It's a real shame because Bentley isn't a troll like Sophia and seems like a kiddo that makes parenting easy (unlike that "hyper"/"high-needs" Nova who has the nerve to want a second cheeto after eating the first one that was thrown on the nasty carpet for her).

[hatchetgirl]

Bentley is dear. So sweet to his little sister. Ryan's parents are great, how did they end up with Ryan? Does he love with them?

I've said my piece about Farah and her parents but her kid deserves some pity here not disdain. That poor child. I fear for her future and for the future of those around her.

Cate, I'm just not going to throw stones at someone with weight and depression/anxiety issues. I was raised by a schizophrenic nightmare who self medicated, but only after age 12. Horrors. Cate needs better help than that counselor. That lady was a "peach".

Amber... dang girl, get rid of that pig and quick!

For all the girls (except cate) stop talking shit in front of your kids! Matt calling Gary a bastard, I think, was bull!

[Tatum]

Mimosa Macy, did you hear what your boyfriend said when you asked him what he was gonna be for Halloween??? An MTV Star! An MTV Star! Stop obsessing and lamenting to him about Rahn as if you're talking to one of your friends at the nail salon. We get it, you're still hot for his chili. I am too. Even with the skull makeup.. Quite possibly even more so because of the skull makeup. He's a shit dad but he sure is pretty.

 

 

Not sure what made me laugh harder...Mimosa Maci, or the admission that you are also hot for Ryan's chili. I freely admit I am too, but not with the skull makeup. That shit was freaky. In the early days when they were still trying to make it work, Ryan could always get by with a "Damn, Maci" in his country boy accent.

 

And yes, if any SO of mine wanted to sit and discuss at length all his ex's shortcomings, and then delve into the reasons behind her shortcomings, I'd feel pretty bemused. Taylor however, just hops right in with his own theories as to why Ryan is such a shitty douche. Perhaps he too is hot for Ryan's chili.

[qtpye]

I admit I kind of admire the fact that at least Taylor has no fucks left to give about pretending to not be in this for the Reality TV fame/money. Even though he's seriously a jerk to put off proposing in hopes of it getting another season or whatever, he's at least honest about it, I guess.

I'd say poor Maci, but well, I'm pretty sure just about all of the girls' significant others they've acquired since dumping their baby daddies have been in the relationships at least partly for the MTV "fame" so I guess he's upfront (unlike say, Matt or Nathan). Maci was dumb enough to fall for it too even without the guy trying to really hide it.

 

After Matt and Tyler, I am beginning to respect Taylor's honesty.  He is not insulting the viewer's intelligence by pretending they have some sort of earth shattering beautiful romance.  Both Matt and Tyler are only with Amber and Cate because of the cameras and MTV money and nobody (besides naive girls on social media) is fooled by their bullshit.

 

 

Yes. They're brothers and not father-son. Originally, I thought that Ryan had difficulty bonding with the infant/toddler and that as Bentley became older their relationship would develop -- but I was wrong. Ryan is still a 16-year-old. When he's forced to do anything with/for Bentley, he acts like that spoiled 16-year-old who is pissed that he has to take the trash out. It's a real shame because Bentley isn't a troll like Sophia and seems like a kiddo that makes parenting easy (unlike that "hyper"/"high-needs" Nova who has the nerve to want a second cheeto after eating the first one that was thrown on the nasty carpet for her).

 

What's hilarious is that Ryan was never 16 on this show.  He was dating Maci when she was 15/16 and he was already in his twenties (it raises my eyebrows that a girl that young was dating what would technically be considered an adult).  I think he is around 26/27 now. 

 

However, I agree his emotional and mental maturity is ten years behind his actual age.  I think Bentley is a sweet adorable kid.  Heck, Bentley is the type of kid that makes people WANT to have kids (unlike Sophia, who might cause mass voluntary sterilization across the country).

 

I wrote before that some men (not all, there are many men out there that are excellent fathers) treat their children in accordance to how they feel about their baby's mama.  If they like the mother, they treat the child well, if not, the child is screwed.

 

Bentley is nothing but a burden and a solid chain that is going to link Maci to Ryan for the rest of his life.  Of course this is his own fault, for having unprotected sex with such a young girl, but Ryan is not one to take responsibility for his actions.

 

Ryan (and this is horrible) probably also resents the attention Bentley takes away from him at Jen and Larry's house.  I bet you handsome Ryan could do no wrong in Jen's eyes, before Bentley was born.

 

On a very shallow note, I like looking at Ryan (there is not a lot of male eye candy on this show), but that boy is going to be screwed once his looks fade.

[teapot]

 

 

 

 

I

 

 

 

 

 

Bentley is nothing but a burden and a solid chain that is going to link Maci to Ryan for the rest of his life.  Of course this is his own fault, for having unprotected sex with such a young girl, but Ryan is not one to take responsibility for his actions.

 

 

Imagine how much fun a guy like TM2 Corey would have with Bentley?  Maybe he could spend his weekends with Corey & Miranda!

[Tatum]

Yeah, according to Maci, Ryan was "after" her since spring of her sophomore year, which would have made her 15, a few months shy of 16. Ryan's birthdate is either 1989 or 1988, depending on which source you look at, but I am leaning towards 1988 as Maci posted a tweet back in 2013 saying she and Bentley celebrated Ryan's 25th birthday with him. So, Maci got pregnant in early 2008 when she was 16 and Ryan had just turned 20. Maci was 17 when Bentley was born and Ryan turned 21 several months after Bentley was born. Maci claims they were dating for around 6 months when she got pregnant. She also directly referenced Ryan coming to her house to pick her up for dates and being polite to her parents when she was talking to Jen and Larry in her original 16 and Pregnant so I think she's telling the truth. Maci's family had at least a few months lead time to sit Maci down and talk about birth control and chose not to, which I think was a very stupid move when your 16 year old is dating a 20 year old who has his own place.

 

Sadly, Ryan at age 20 was far more accomplished than he is now. If he was born in 1988 (and I think he was)- he is now 28.

 

Also, for those interested, the age of consent in TN is either 16 or 17, as long as your partner is within either 4 or 5 years of your age (I looked up both TN and Indiana, and I can't remember which law goes with which state). Both Ryan and Gary just barely squeaked by the consent laws.

Edited February 11, 2016 by Tatum

[NikSac]

huh?  An invoice is the same thing as a bill.  I don't call it a water invoice, I call it my water bill.

 

I know, but that's exactly why it bugged me. Maybe it's just a regional thing, or family thing, or who knows what but it just seemed like Farrah being snobby again. She's too good for bills, she receives invoices. Maybe it's just me. :)

 

ETA: gunderda I just realized my original post about the bill/invoice thing might've sounded snarky towards you and it wasn't intended that way at all. I'm sorry if it came off that way. It was snarky, but I meant it to be towards Farrah's snobbiness.

Edited February 11, 2016 by NikSac

[gunderda]

I know, but that's exactly why it bugged me. Maybe it's just a regional thing, or family thing, or who knows what but it just seemed like Farrah being snobby again. She's too good for bills, she receives invoices. Maybe it's just me. :)

ohhhh did she say it was an invoice??? if so NOW I get what you're saying (or if not, then I don't lol)

but yes, she was being super snobby as always ;)

[teapot]

ohhhh did she say it was an invoice??? if so NOW I get what you're saying (or if not, then I don't lol)

but yes, she was being super snobby as always ;)

yeah, my *job* is to pay INVOICES, and I work said job to pay my BILLS...

 

(not that anyone asked me, but there ya go...)

[ghoulina]

Does anyone remember during the drunken, multigenerational co-bachelor/bachelorette party how April and Dawn waxed nostalgic about how much fun it was with Butch (when he wasn't beating them)? I would not be surprised if April and Butch bumped uglies while C&T were away.

 

I think you mean Kim? Although, with as inappropriate as I have found her to be, in regards to how she handled the adoption, I suppose it might not be crazy to imagine Adoption Counselor Dawn showing up at the bachelor/ette party. 

 

We've been talking a lot about Cate's body but Farrah's is more WTF to me.

 

I can agree with this. It may be hard, but Catelynn could conceivably lose weight and get in shape. There is virtually nothing Farrah can do about the wax statue mess she's made of herself. 

 

Ryan (and this is horrible) probably also resents the attention Bentley takes away from him at Jen and Larry's house.  I bet you handsome Ryan could do no wrong in Jen's eyes, before Bentley was born.

 

Ooooh, I never thought of that before, but I bet you're right. It's like he's the child who was an only child for many years, and then his parents had an "oops" baby. Suddenly he doesn't get all the attention anymore. Ryan is so immature. I can totally see him being jealous of how his parents dote on Bentley. 

[BRAVOADDICT]

Amber, if Matt is still insisting that not all of the kids are his have him take paternity tests. Maybe you can get a group rate. I find it hard to believe that all these girls look at him, think that he is a great catch, and try to pass their babies off on him for all his money. If it's at the point where they are taking him to court there must be a reason somewhere. Maybe they will do it on the reunion show like Maury.

 

Tyler, please please stop bringing up Carly all the time. Everything in Cate's life does not have to revolve around the baby she gave up. Maybe if you stop talking about her Cate will have an easier time.

 

Farrah, my son is in the same grade as your daughter. None of the girls in his class wear makeup to school.I guess we don't roll like that in our city.

[gunderda]

yeah, my *job* is to pay INVOICES, and I work said job to pay my BILLS...

 

(not that anyone asked me, but there ya go...)

ooooook, makes total sense now!

I apologize Niksac for being snarky earlier (my day started off terrible the moment i woke up and it's only gotten worse with me dropping my entire lunch all over the floor at work lol)

[teapot]

ooooook, makes total sense now!

I apologize Niksac for being snarky earlier (my day started off terrible the moment i woke up and it's only gotten worse with me dropping my entire lunch all over the floor at work lol)

worst thing ever!!  at least it's almost Friday...

[NikSac]

ooooook, makes total sense now!

I apologize Niksac for being snarky earlier (my day started off terrible the moment i woke up and it's only gotten worse with me dropping my entire lunch all over the floor at work lol)

 

No worries and sorry my post probably sounded wrong too!  Sorry about your lunch - hope you got a much better one.

[FlowerofCarnage]

Imagine how much fun a guy like TM2 Corey would have with Bentley? Maybe he could spend his weekends with Corey & Miranda!

I could totally see Corey taking Bentley(complete with a little camo outfit) on a hunting and fishing trip and having a blast.

[politichick]

I must say Leah's magic kit made me smile because that was one of my favorite toys as a kid. That and the science sets. I'm glad she liked it enough to bring it with her even if it was mostly Gary and Kristina trying to get it out of the house.

Why are people assuming that Gary and Kristina were trying to get it out of the house? At least one of them obviously spent time helping her learn how to use it and she learned one trick already. Maybe she brought it because it's something she really wanted to play with while at Amber's. Matt will help her with it, I'm sure, while her lazy lolls around in bed half of the day.

 

Ryan does seem to treat Bentley more like he's his little brother than his child, but I don't think he's jealous of the time his parents spend with the little boy. He may be more annoyed that they're forcing him to spend more time at home when Bentley's there.Ryan probably won't become a more decent father until Bentley is 12 or 13 -- or older.

 

Poor Sophia. I hope she has at least a few friends. We may not see them because their parents don't want them on this shit show, but I hope they exist. Farrah is going to get paid back for her vile behavior in spades in about 6 years. She must take after Derek because Farrah was actually very pretty before she fucked up her face with plastic surgery. I couldn't believe my eyes when I got a look at her butt when she returned from London. WTF would someone do that to herself?

 

I hope Teresa is watching this season and has a word with Catelyn about how she's wasting her life away and needs to get her fucking shit together. And I'm not saying that the has to become a size 6 but she needs to drop some of  that weight to preserve her health. She also needs to stop jumping on Tyler like she weighs 100 pounds before she hurts the boy!

[politichick]

No, Ryan has a Mustang.  That car is a Charger.  

 

I love little Bentley, he seems like a such a sweet kid.  You can tell he's benefited from having a lot of good people in his life.  

 

I also like Leah, but I wish Amber would use her name a little more, sick of the boo crap all the time.  The text from Kristina was such a nice, refreshing, adult move.  Seemed so out of place on this show.  Matt's such a shady fuck.  Too bad there's no one looking out for Amber.  She's such an easy mark.  He'll leave her penniless, mark my words.

 

I can't with Farrah, Sophia and the fam.  I fast forward through them.

 

Which brings me to Cait & Tyler.  I agree that she purposely called him with the watching Nova question.  I can guarantee he does nothing to raise that kid.  Tyler's always been a punk pretending to be a good guy.  Yet Cait chose him and I can't see her ever leaving.  I also agree that she could do something different with that hair.  Doesn't MTV employ stylists?

Plus, she eats what Tyler wants and it's obvious, looking at Butch, that his metabolism allows him to eat crap without gaining weight.  Not true for Caitlyn, unfortunately.

Caitlyn actually used to get some cute hair cuts back in the day. Maybe that's where she should start. a few months ago, I saw this girl in the locker room at the gym who is obviously working on losing some weight (though she's not as chubby and out of shape as Cait) and she had obviously just gotten a new haircut that I could see was giving her a little boost of confidence and helping to keep her on the fitness path. It was a really nice haircut, too, so I happily complimented her. 

[Elizabeth9]

I think Cate is the prettiest girl on the show. Just in general, she has so much potential. But apparently she doesn't seem to care...

[lidarose9]

One of my theories about April: Some women really bond with infants when they are tiny and helpless but it doesn't last once they become little individuals with personalities. Other women are the opposite: they kinda get through the infancy but really enjoy it when the kid becomes a real human they can interact with. I think April is the former: she seems completely in love with Nova and no complaints from her about Cate dumping the baby with her. This might help explain why she was so outraged about Cate giving up Carly for adoption. This also explains her own choice as a young mother: she was probably really into Cate when she was little but once she grew up a little, April was not interested anymore.

 

I remember so well the episode where she went with Cate when Cate was picking out a prom dress. She was so angry, so jealous. April was outraged that Catelynn would give up a baby in order to have a real teenager's life, and saw it as an unspoken criticism of the decision she made as a teen mom. April was seething with resentment back then. I don't see that in her anymore. I don't know how, but I think she may have had to process some of that resentment and let it go. (I may be all wrong about this. April is so unpredictable, she could blow up any time and prove me wrong.)

 

Also, I suspect Cate is the other kind of mother that isn't that into having an infant. She's not enjoying motherhood. There might be a lot of reasons for that, but one might be it's just her nature.

[SPLAIN]

So Cate might not have anxiety attacks, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have anxiety.  I've never had a full blown anxiety attack but I've experienced bouts of pretty bad anxiety (both times being post partum) to the point where I couldn't open my mouth to speak without bursting into tears, heart racing, stomach in knots, ect.  I don't doubt she's got both depression and anxiety and it's kind of shitty to dismiss what she's going through because she's not being rushed to the hospital via ambulance. Also, she mentioned a couple of times that she's on anti depressants.  The one time in my life I went on anti depressants (a very low dose) I blew up like a goddamn whale. One of the reasons I went off of them pretty quickly.  Between her depression, the meds and being overwhelmed by the baby, I'm not surprised she's not munching on kale salads and spending half the day in the gym.  Something needs to shift in her life before she'll be able to take control.  I'm not even about to hate on her for it, I feel compassion for her.  And fuck Tyler's useless ass.   "Letting" her do everything because she didn't "get to" with Carly.  Get on out of here with that.

 

Re the bolded part - Did Tyler or someone on the show say this about Cate or to her? Trying to understand where this came from because people can choose not to believe Cate's diagnosis.

 

Also, people can be on anti-depressants, it doesn't mean they are suffering from depression. This past year at the facility I work at, we had at least 20 patients who were told they were depressed by an M.D. not a psychotherapist or psychiatrist. All we have is Cate's word that she is depressed. She, like many other people, can walk into a doctor's office and start rattling off symptoms and walk out with a prescription. One of my relatives is walking around claiming she has depression when all it is she is just lazy as hell, overweight and doesn't want to lose weight in order to get her diabetes under control. She has time to go to the casinos, travel out of town, eat out five times a week at the local buffets, goes to the bars with her girlfriends while her two children are dropped off at a relative's house. Having dealt with PPD myself and watching my sister deal with depression, I have come to be truly annoyed with what Cate is pushing on the viewers and those around her.

 

 

I don't believe Cate has either or. I think she may have once been mis-diagnosed as being depressed or having anxiety. Looking at the therapist Tyler has, it doesn't look like they are going to the proper professionals. The therapists that work in the facility where I work have mentioned they highly question any therapist/counselor who appears on any reality show. I think of this every time I see any therapist appear on any reality show such as Teen Mom.

 

One thing I noticed in the last episode was how Tyler entered the bedroom and asked Cate what was wrong. We didn't see her face, but we heard her supposedly say something. Cate was wrapped up in her comforter in her bed. That scene made it appear as if Cate was having one of her "moments" except there was an X-Box controller right next to her. Apparently, she spends her time playing video games in bed (God knows how many hours) although MTV seemed to edit that scene to fit the "depression" theme that is Cate's storyline. Cate was depressed because she didn't beat her high score. 

 

There is no baby Nova around, Cate is doing nothing in her life, Tyler is laying around not wanting to "conform to society" so what else do MTV have to show us? That scene was questionable just like much of Cate and Tyler's life.

 

 

I would not be surprised if April and Butch bumped uglies while C&T were away.

April's husband wouldn't like that very much. I have wondered how he feels about having a baby at his house 75 percent of the time. He and April are newly married and I would guess when he married her, he wasn't about living his life with his new wife and having to care for another person's child. I'd be royally pissed if that happened to me. I wouldn't want to start out my first years with my new spouse while they cared for another person's baby.

Edited February 12, 2016 by SPLAIN

[SPLAIN]

 

Why are people assuming that Gary and Kristina were trying to get it out of the house? At least one of them obviously spent time helping her learn how to use it and she learned one trick already. Maybe she brought it because it's something she really wanted to play with while at Amber's. Matt will help her with it, I'm sure, while her lazy lolls around in bed half of the day.

THANK YOU.

[poeticlicensed]

ohhhh did she say it was an invoice??? if so NOW I get what you're saying (or if not, then I don't lol)

but yes, she was being super snobby as always ;)

Maybe because she was in the UK she decided to be very British and reference the "invoice" she received. She is such a freaking poser I'm sure that's what it is she was faking being a Brit. Edited February 12, 2016 by poeticlicensed

[lezlers]

Re the bolded part - Did Tyler or someone on the show say this about Cate or to her? Trying to understand where this came from because people can choose not to believe Cate's diagnosis.

 

Also, people can be on anti-depressants, it doesn't mean they are suffering from depression. This past year at the facility I work at, we had at least 20 patients who were told they were depressed by an M.D. not a psychotherapist or psychiatrist. All we have is Cate's word that she is depressed. She, like many other people, can walk into a doctor's office and start rattling off symptoms and walk out with a prescription. One of my relatives is walking around claiming she has depression when all it is she is just lazy as hell, overweight and doesn't want to lose weight in order to get her diabetes under control. She has time to go to the casinos, travel out of town, eat out five times a week at the local buffets, goes to the bars with her girlfriends while her two children are dropped off at a relative's house. Having dealt with PPD myself and watching my sister deal with depression, I have come to be truly annoyed with what Cate is pushing on the viewers and those around her.

 

 

I don't believe Cate has either or. I think she may have once been mis-diagnosed as being depressed or having anxiety. Looking at the therapist Tyler has, it doesn't look like they are going to the proper professionals. The therapists that work in the facility where I work have mentioned they highly question any therapist/counselor who appears on any reality show. I think of this every time I see any therapist appear on any reality show such as Teen Mom.

 

One thing I noticed in the last episode was how Tyler entered the bedroom and asked Cate what was wrong. We didn't see her face, but we heard her supposedly say something. Cate was wrapped up in her comforter in her bed. That scene made it appear as if Cate was having one of her "moments" except there was an X-Box controller right next to her. Apparently, she spends her time playing video games in bed (God knows how many hours) although MTV seemed to edit that scene to fit the "depression" theme that is Cate's storyline. Cate was depressed because she didn't beat her high score. 

 

There is no baby Nova around, Cate is doing nothing in her life, Tyler is laying around not wanting to "conform to society" so what else do MTV have to show us? That scene was questionable just like much of Cate and Tyler's life.

 

April's husband wouldn't like that very much. I have wondered how he feels about having a baby at his house 75 percent of the time. He and April are newly married and I would guess when he married her, he wasn't about living his life with his new wife and having to care for another person's child. I'd be royally pissed if that happened to me. I wouldn't want to start out my first years with my new spouse while they cared for another person's baby.

 

Ok?  You're entitled to your opinion, like everyone else.   Looking at Cate's background and what she's dealt with in her life, I'm not quite sure what would lead someone to assume she's lying about being depressed or anxious.  It's not like anti-depressants get you high, so there's really no incentive to lie to get put on them (anti-anxiety drugs are a whole different thing, but she specifically said she's on anti-depressants.)  I'm not sure why anyone would choose to present themselves like Cate does to the public (and face some of the cruelty hurled at her online) if that's not really the way they're feeling.   I'm sure she'd much rather be fit, healthy and happy.  I hope she finds her way there. 

[butterbody]

Maybe because she was in the UK she decided to be very British and reference the "invoice" she received. She is such a freaking poser I'm sure that's what it is she was faking being a Brit.

Thank you. I attempted to articulate exactly what you just said, but was trying to come up with something funny about Madonna and petrol and then I got too high and couldn't put a thought together. Woops just did it again.

[GreatKazu]

 

I'm not sure why anyone would choose to present themselves like Cate does to the public (and face some of the cruelty hurled at her online) if that's not really the way they're feeling.

Two words: Yolanda Foster (Real Housewives of Beverly Hills). Two more words: Leah Messer.

 

 

It's not like anti-depressants get you high, so there's really no incentive to lie to get put on them

No, but it gives credence to the depression claims. Another theory is, Catelynn may THINK she has depression, it doesn't make it so. Some people can make themselves believe they have something, but not really suffer from it. 

 

 

Many of the girls on this franchise put out there how they are suffering from this, that, and the other thing. It is quite easy for them to claim something in order to get sympathy and to deflect their own shitty behavior. Not that Cate is some horrible person, but she may have found that life with Tyler and a baby is not what she envisioned. She is probably kicking herself in her fat behind for even having a baby in order to secure Tyler to her because she felt he may leave her. Just two years prior he had called off the engagement. Cate had to go into over-drive in order to make sure Tyler stuck around. Traces of Maci. Cate now has a baby that she can barely tolerate or take care of. What better excuse to cover up her regrets than to claim she is depressed. Cate isn't going to come forward and announce she s made another bad decision. She, like Amber, will ride this out rather than take their heads out of the sand and admit they done fucked up. 

 

Catelynn is slowly letting the viewers know exactly what Tyler is about. He is one very volatile person and he can't bother to care for their child. Cate may be angry, bitter, sad, and having regrets. I don't think she is mentally ill or has any disorders. Cate knows how to play the public very well. Well, at least her devoted fans, anyways. She sure played us with her whole shtick about wanting to go to college and to have a career. She and Tyler spent over three seasons shoving that bullshit down our throats. Now, she just wants to be a SAHM without the baby.

 

 

Maybe because she was in the UK she decided to be very British and reference the "invoice" she received.

I thought it was Farrah just being stupid Farrah. She is always using the wrong words in place of other words. That water bill matter was pure BS. She may have a leak on her property. No way her mother and dad used water during that time period for the bill. Bills are issued at least a month after service.

Edited February 12, 2016 by GreatKazu

[ginger90]

Magic kit update: https://twitter.com/AmberLPortwood/status/696899275289194496

Gee, I wonder why?

[redjello]

All we have is Cate's word that she is depressed. She, like many other people, can walk into a doctor's office and start rattling off symptoms and walk out with a prescription. 

 

 

Given everything we've seen about Cate's circumstances - beginning with her original 16 & P debut and up to now - I would find it absolutely impossible to believe any claim that she ISN'T suffering from depression.  Just watching how she's changed throughout the series - going from a naive pregnant little girl with cute rotating hair-dos trying really hard to do the "right" thing (adoption) and dreaming of moving on to a successful life (College!  A social work career!) and then slowly shutting down more and more each year until here she is: sad, insecure, goal-less, overweight, unable at times to even get out of bed. That is EXACTLY what living with depression looks like.

 

Apparently, she spends her time playing video games in bed (God knows how many hours) although MTV seemed to edit that scene to fit the "depression" theme that is Cate's storyline. 

 

 

Or perhaps that she's so paralyzed by depression that she can't get out of bed, but given the fact that one can only escape in sleep for so long that when she's awake she plays video games as a coping mechanism to distract from reality and pass the time.

 

Looking at Cate's background and what she's dealt with in her life, I'm not quite sure what would lead someone to assume she's lying about being depressed or anxious.  It's not like anti-depressants get you high, so there's really no incentive to lie to get put on them (anti-anxiety drugs are a whole different thing, but she specifically said she's on anti-depressants.) 

 

 

WORD to this!  Plus, Cait seems to be extremely defensive/apologetic/embarrassed about the fact that she is on antidepressants. I don't believe for a minute she would lie in order to get them. I think she resents having to take them and considers it yet another failure, but takes them with the sincere hope that they will help.  I also think the people in her life are of the mindset that having to take antidepressants IS a failure so she is probably, in many ways, stigmatized by those closest to her.  I truly feel sorry for this girl and hope that somehow (despite the reality tv vortex she has been sucked into) she is able to get the help she needs. 

 

[lidarose9]

I have to say, I bought the whole happy ending crap the first 3 years or so, when Cate and Tyler were riding high on their having made the selfless decision to give up Carly. Remember they both wanted to go to school and become adoption counselors? They felt so good about the life they'd given Carly and so hopeful for their own future. If the show had ended then, who knows what would have happened. But as with all the other people on this show, within a few years, this MTV gravy train turned into a career, and when you throw free money at people, things change. It's one thing when you have to make realistic plans for your life and actually follow through. It's another when you can sit back and coast. Without any need or motivation, they've both stalled out in nowheresville, where the only thing either of them can come up with to do with their lives is to get married and have another baby.

 

[SPLAIN]

 

Or perhaps that she's so paralyzed by depression

LOL Ok, this is not directed at you at all, but this made me laugh simply because I the only times I have watched Catelynn be paralyzed is when her butt is on a couch. Any couch. Even a therapist's couch in a slouching position as her eyes are paralyzed on her cell phone, scanning through her social media page.

 

 

slowly shutting down more and more each year until here she is: sad, insecure, goal-less, overweight, unable at times to even get out of bed. That is EXACTLY what living with depression looks like.

I see truly depressed people in my line of work every single day. Many of them have a lot going on in their lives. Plenty of them work and take on a full load to get away from that depressed feeling. They would rather be a part of life then laying around on a couch and dumping their kids off on someone else to raise.

 

Tyler drags Cate to his counselor. According to an interview Catelynn gave when she was pregnant, she already had a psychiatrist she was seeing and she was also seeing a therapist. Why then did Tyler drag Cate to his counselor? Was that a staged scene for MTV cameras? Cate has been all over mentioning her issues so, I don't believe she is "embarrassed" or that she feels a stigma from anyone around her about what she claims she is plagued by. And just recently, we were privy to hearing Tyler talk about his attempt at suicide. I am not going to tip-toe around, worrying about offending anyone because I choose to believe there is something suspect about all of this. I just feel a lot of what is said and done is not honest.

 

  Cate needs to just come out and say she is worried Tyler will leave her. Again. Having a huge wedding and wearing a wedding band hasn't curtailed her feelings of Tyler almost abandoning her. She feels inadequate, insecure, she has low self-esteem and she is not comfortable with how she looks overall. I believe Cate is alright with Tyler not going out and seeking work because God forbid he goes out to work he might set his sights on another girl:

http://hollywoodlife.com/2011/09/28/teen-mom-catelynn-lowell-tyler-baltierra-split/

 

“I feel like he’s just gonna dip out one day and go screw all these women,” she tells Dr. Drew Pinsky. “I need to get you an [engagement] ring so girls leave you alone!”

Catelynn also says she’s had a difficult time losing the post-baby weight and that causes her to become jealous of other girls.

“I have this envious side, and was like, none of those other girls dancing had a baby before,” she says of going to a club with Tyler. “It opened up some of my self-esteem issues.”

 

 

Cate may have felt anxious because of the impending birth of her baby. She may have worried about Tyler running out on her and not going through with the wedding (again), leaving her with the baby to raise alone. It is enough to make anyone feel sick. It just seems each time Catelynn goes through moments of "depression" it always seems connected to Tyler. Even the damn bachelor party gave Cate the heebie jeebies. 

 

Was I the only one who saw Cate and Tyler on Couple's Therapy? Even back then Cate was doing the whole "blanket over the head" routine and couldn't imagine not having Tyler in her life:

 

http://www.examiner.com/article/why-tyler-and-catelynn-of-teen-mom-are-on-couples-therapy

As episodes of "Couples Therapy" progress it's becoming more and more evident he's being pressured into marriage by Catelynn, and that she is making him feel guilty about leaving her - ever.

She really lost it on the last episode when Tyler came to the revelation that he isn't sure he can see himself with Catelynn for the rest of his life. Catelynn got in bed alone with all her clothes on, pulled the covers over her head, and cried her eyes out. When Tyler tried to talk to her she refused - obviously trying to avoid what she didn't want to hear and coming off as very manipulative and controlling.

At one point you could see the sheer terror Catelynn was feeling when she began asking questions about Tyler's one-on-one therapy session. She seemed to realize she might be losing him as he gets outside advice about what to consider regarding the future. Catelynn commented he had become "distant" and it is obvious she is threatened by anyone else having influence over his thinking.

 

 

 

 

I also think the people in her life are of the mindset that having to take antidepressants IS a failure so she is probably, in many ways, stigmatized by those closest to her.

The only thing those people and those around them seem to have stigmas about are porn. Forget drug use and domestic violence, or even having a baby without having a job first. Just don't be a woman in the sex industry because those women are "whores" according to Tyler. The only exception is when they are entertaining Tyler at his bachelor party.

Edited February 12, 2016 by SPLAIN

[starfire]

I think Cate and Tyler's therapist is highly questionable. She reminds me of Cate sometimes as she seems kind of lazy and lifeless. I have never heard her suggest any positive things they can do to improve their circumstances. She doesn't help them set goals. She seems to just listen and agree with whatever they say. I don't think she is helping them at all. On the other hand, I don't think Cate and Tyler are serious about improving their lives.

[guilfoyleatpp]

I find any counselor who agrees to have their therapy sessions recorded for television to be highly questionable. 

 

I do believe that Cate is depressed and probably sleep deprived and still fucking hormonal and that joke of a therapist is not helping. 

[shelley1234]

As someone who has spent my whole career working with people with a variety of mental illnesses and histories of trauma and abuse, I have never questioned the depression and anxiety that Catelynn has reported experiencing.  I've unfortunately seen people fake mental illness for whatever gain and that just isn't what it looks like, in my experience.  I also think it is unfortunate when people sit in judgment over whether people are "really" depressed or if they are depressed enough, etc.  It's hard enough without the dime story psychology.  

[CofCinci]

I know I'm not the only therapist commenting and we all provide a little differently -- Professionally, I believe it is unethical for the clinician to provide both individual psychotherapy and conjoint (couple) sessions. That's just me. I'm either the individual's psychotherapist or the couple's. Never both. Of course everyone rolls different. I'm not impressed with Catelynn's therapist. Was she in the basement of a community center? Was it laundry day for her? Does Catelynn get homework at all?

Tyler is manipulative and I've seen behavior indicative of psychological abuse. He's left before and he'll leave again regardless of how many more NotCarlys she births. Is her therapist even working on her issues of dependency?

Edited February 12, 2016 by CofCinci

[Jax7917]

Maci- Agreed that she's the best mom of the 4, and probably of the 8 including teen mom 2. Sure, she might still be crushing on ryan which is why she always wants to see him, but regardless I think its very mature that she tries to be a good influence on bentley by getting along with his dad and including him in everything. Bentley is adorable and very mature for his age . I do think maci is an alcoholic though. Every time shes on screen shes drinking.

 

Amber- That's right, matt didn't sign up for this. He is just on every episode of teen mom with you and someone ELSE signed the contract for him to be on this show. Those 2 really irk me. Neither of them have jobs and amber uses her time in "prison" as an excuse to feel sorry for herself all the time. we get it Amber. You went to jail. You don't have to bring it up in every conversation.

 

Farrah- She isn't the only person I blame for the way she acts. I blame everyone she has a relationship with because they all accept it and kiss her ass ( including teen mom producers). Kick her ass off the show and do not keep giving her paychecks to encourage her behavior.  Her parents are constantly bullied by her and they still kiss the ground she walks on. How she has any people at all in her life who still associate with her is beyond me.

 

Catelynn- Girl, stop complaining about anxiety and go and get a job. The times I feel most upset and anxious is when Im sitting at home doing nothing but thinking of things going on in my life all day. Getting a job or I dont know, taking care of your daughter will distract you. I do think they are forced to talk about Carly a lot of the time because that is the reason she's on the show. So I don't think talking about her constantly is really her decision.

[Tatum]

Tyler is manipulative and I've seen behavior indicative of psychological abuse. He's left before and he'll leave again regardless of how many more NotCarlys she births. Is her therapist even working on her issues of dependency?

 

There's the million dollar question. I hope the answer is yes.

[lezlers]

Two words: Yolanda Foster (Real Housewives of Beverly Hills). Two more words: Leah Messer.

 

No, but it gives credence to the depression claims. Another theory is, Catelynn may THINK she has depression, it doesn't make it so. Some people can make themselves believe they have something, but not really suffer from it. 

 

 

Many of the girls on this franchise put out there how they are suffering from this, that, and the other thing. It is quite easy for them to claim something in order to get sympathy and to deflect their own shitty behavior. Not that Cate is some horrible person, but she may have found that life with Tyler and a baby is not what she envisioned. She is probably kicking herself in her fat behind for even having a baby in order to secure Tyler to her because she felt he may leave her. Just two years prior he had called off the engagement. Cate had to go into over-drive in order to make sure Tyler stuck around. Traces of Maci. Cate now has a baby that she can barely tolerate or take care of. What better excuse to cover up her regrets than to claim she is depressed. Cate isn't going to come forward and announce she s made another bad decision. She, like Amber, will ride this out rather than take their heads out of the sand and admit they done fucked up. 

 

Catelynn is slowly letting the viewers know exactly what Tyler is about. He is one very volatile person and he can't bother to care for their child. Cate may be angry, bitter, sad, and having regrets. I don't think she is mentally ill or has any disorders. Cate knows how to play the public very well. Well, at least her devoted fans, anyways. She sure played us with her whole shtick about wanting to go to college and to have a career. She and Tyler spent over three seasons shoving that bullshit down our throats. Now, she just wants to be a SAHM without the baby.

 

I thought it was Farrah just being stupid Farrah. She is always using the wrong words in place of other words. That water bill matter was pure BS. She may have a leak on her property. No way her mother and dad used water during that time period for the bill. Bills are issued at least a month after service.

 

Ha ha, touche on the Leah and Yolanda comment!  Although I'd argue their scenarios are a lot different than Cate's (and I do believe Leah suffers from depression and self medicates, hence her pillses.)

 

It's certainly possible Cate is faking her depression.  Anything is possible.  I just think objectively, there are lot more facts that support the contention that she's actually depressed than faking it.   It just seems illogical (again, to ME) that the assumption be she's faking it, given her life and everything she's been through.  I think she needs a MUCH better counselor, the one she has now is shit, and I hope she gets better.  I think dropping 140 lbs of douchebag named Tyler would be a  good first step.

Edited February 12, 2016 by lezlers

[lezlers]

As someone who has spent my whole career working with people with a variety of mental illnesses and histories of trauma and abuse, I have never questioned the depression and anxiety that Catelynn has reported experiencing.  I've unfortunately seen people fake mental illness for whatever gain and that just isn't what it looks like, in my experience.  I also think it is unfortunate when people sit in judgment over whether people are "really" depressed or if they are depressed enough, etc.  It's hard enough without the dime story psychology.  

 

THANK YOU!!!  That's the feeling I've been trying to express about the posts exclaiming she's "faking it" for whatever reasons.

[ghoulina]

Ryan probably won't become a more decent father until Bentley is 12 or 13 -- or older

 

By then it will likely be too late. Bentley already looks at him like he's just ready to heave a huge sigh and say, "shut up already!" But he's too polite to do so. 

 

Poor Sophia. I hope she has at least a few friends. We may not see them because their parents don't want them on this shit show, but I hope they exist.

 

I bet she has a really hard time making friends. From the baby talk to the entitled attitude, I bet the other kids avoid her like the plague. Farrah has really done her a daughter a disservice, by treating her as if she's some super special snowflake who can wear makeup to school and have her own Twitter account. The other parents are probably wary of the whole family as well. It really sucks for Sophia. 

[ghoulina]

As for Catelynn's supposed anxiety and/or depression, I just don't feel like we see enough of their life to truly know what is going on with her. It's quite possible that she has struggled with these issues for a long time, and her declining appearance has only added to it, and now she just can't get motivated to get out of her rut. I definitely think that giving up your child for adoption is something so hard to do that ongoing therapy would be necessary. It seems, to me, as if Cate has never truly dealt with that issue. And I think interacting so much with Carly and her parents is making it harder for her to move on. So yea, I can definitely see how the girl would be depressed from all of that. 

 

But, on the other hand, there are people who are dealing with similar losses, go through depression, but they still function and work and go to school, etc. There are also people who are just super lazy and unmotivated and will use depression as an excuse when people judge them. 

 

I don't really know which way to fall with Catelynn. We see these little snippets, and I just don't know....I would feel uncomfortable definitively saying one way or another. One thing I am fairly certain on, I don't think Cate is the type to actually lie and say she has something she knows she doesn't have. I think Cate truly believes she is depressed and suffers from anxiety. 

 

And, of course, there are varying degrees. I'm not going to judge someone and say, "You're not depressed enough". My sister has struggled with depression her entire life, she even developed post partum psychosis after having her son and it was SUPER scary. Meanwhile, I've had some situational depression here and there that has been easier to get out of. But I wouldn't want people thinking I'm full of shit for saying I'm depressed, because I'm not trying to slit my wrists, because I can get out of bed every day and function. 

 

Perfectly functioning people can be depressed and lazy slobs aren't always depressed. Sometimes they're just lazy slobs. 

 

I think the best thing is for Catelynn to get a GOOD therapist, participate in regular therapy, and get a life outside of Tyler. I think she is so scared of losing him that she doesn't want either of them to work, so she can be with him 24-7. I bet she WANTS to leave the baby home when she goes places, so he can't get up to anything shady. Poor girl, she HAS been through a lot in her young life. She obviously has abandonment and attachment issues and they were probably never properly dealt with. Depression or not, anxiety or not, she could definitely use some help. 

[DangerousMinds]

As someone who has spent my whole career working with people with a variety of mental illnesses and histories of trauma and abuse, I have never questioned the depression and anxiety that Catelynn has reported experiencing.  I've unfortunately seen people fake mental illness for whatever gain and that just isn't what it looks like, in my experience.  I also think it is unfortunate when people sit in judgment over whether people are "really" depressed or if they are depressed enough, etc.  It's hard enough without the dime story psychology.  

Thank you.

[StatisticalOutlier]

Amber, if Matt is still insisting that not all of the kids are his have him take paternity tests. Maybe you can get a group rate.

 

That's what I really didn't get about their conversation when they were sitting on the couch (yeah, that narrows it down) with the producer.  Amber is talking about if it's true that Matt has these other kids how she'll feel so stupid, etc., and I was shouting, "The man is sitting right there.  ASK HIM.  Get him on the record."  And then do paternity tests, and...case closed.  WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR???

 

 

Tyler, please please stop bringing up Carly all the time. Everything in Cate's life does not have to revolve around the baby she gave up. Maybe if you stop talking about her Cate will have an easier time.

 

In Tyler's defense (god help me), Carly is their storyline.  I like to think that we see 100% of their conversations about Carly, every single bit of it.  And the rest of their lives has nothing to do with it. 

 

 

Poor Sophia. I hope she has at least a few friends. We may not see them because their parents don't want them on this shit show, but I hope they exist.

 

I don't know.  I can't imagine wanting my child to be Sophia's friend.  And I think anyone with sufficiently poor judgment to want their kid around that mess of a family wouldn't have a problem with having their kid on any TV show, including this shit show.

 

 

I'm not impressed with Catelynn's therapist. Was she in the basement of a community center? Was it laundry day for her?

 

Right.  Nobody else has mentioned where they met.  All I could come up with was the basement of an Elks Lodge, but I think you're right--community center.

Edited February 12, 2016 by StatisticalOutlier