S04.E15: Pucker & Pout

[teapot]

I'm trying to decide if Stassi coming back means this show is jumping the shark -- or if her presence will re-invigorate the show.  Not sure yet.  I like that she's coming back down & out (supposedly) & begging & pleading for everyone's friendship -- especially when she was so above-it-all & haughty & smug before.  My prob is I'm having a hard time believing her down & out routine.  She doesn't seem so down & out to me.  I'm thinking this crap is all made-up bullshit by the producers to stick her back on the show.  

 

 

 

 

On Stassi's podcast in the summer, she was talking about having a rough patch w/her BF & moving in w/a "crazy single girlfriend."  I read on reality tea or something that supposedly the GF was Kristen.

 

She had Rachael (friend of Kristen's who was at Katie's party) on, and R was teasing her about wearing the same blue dress for a week straight b/c she didn't have her clothes.  Last week Kristen did Stassi's podcast, and Stassi's like, "remember the blue dress I wore for a week straight?  Yup, you saw it."

 

I can't hate, I just can't!!!

[Duke2801]

Quote

So Lala is butthurt over the non-invite from Katie because of elementary school? Are you fucking kidding me? Next time my husband eats the last cookie I'm going to tell him the heart-wrenching tale of the kid who stole my cookie on the playground. My poignant tale is sure to bring him to tears.

 

 

Ha ha!  Oh I almost forgot about that.  I was like- wait is this 25 year old woman actually telling us a sad tale of woe from... elementary school?  The ship has sailed on eliciting pity from something that happened 2 decades ago.

[Tara Ariano]

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

 

Vanderpump Rules Puckers And Pouts With Aplomb
Katie's launch springs everyone but James into new territory, while the Stassi apology tour adds more dates due to popular demand.

[Ubiquitous]

Ha ha!  Oh I almost forgot about that.  I was like- wait is this 25 year old woman actually telling us a sad tale of woe from... elementary school?  The ship has sailed on eliciting pity from something that happened 2 decades ago.

Didn't LaLa whine about some other childhood trauma earlier this seadon?

[walnutqueen]

Pipsqueak busboy whose mommy got him a job ... priceless!

[ghoulina]

Didn't LaLa whine about some other childhood trauma earlier this seadon?

 

Yes, I think she has mentioned several times not being picked for things in school, feeling left out, etc. Even if that is true, it's time to get over it. I was the nerdy, poor, theater kid in a private school full of rich, sporty chicks. I did not fit in at all and was often excluded. IDGAF. In fact, I think my experience only made me feel more sure of myself, more likely to do my own thing. Lala is just a brat, who likes to cry to mommy any time things don't go her way. She's a very pretty girl, IMO, and I think she has a hard time understanding why people don't just gravitate to her. 

[ScoobieDoobs]

 

 

Of course Sandoval could be found at the "brow bar" station of Katie's event. 

 

Hmmmm, so how many times a week does Sandoval get his brows done?  Man, he plucks those suckers so freakin' much I wonder if he's gonna be bald above his eyes in 10 years.

Edited February 9, 2016 by ScoobieDoobs

[Sun-Bun]

Aleks wasn't fired from Below Deck. He did make comments about the captain not leading by example and expecting too much from some crew members. I believe he was also well liked by the crew. He seemed to be the confidante for a few of them and gave pretty good advice. I think he is too good for Kristin but he hired Rocky so I question his judgement.

Kristin really needs to bring the crazy back, I am bored with this season.

Ahhh, see, I'm getting my BD seasons mixed up with Aleks and his actual career trajectory---I could've sworn he was fired or not asked back for the next season, something like that...I do remember that he wasn't liked by several cast members though and rubbed a few folks the wrong way..

[DrSparkles]

Why is it every time I look at Jax I think that the Museum of Natural History has lost a figure from the Neanderthal diorama?

This is so perfect.

[straightshooter]

Well, I know what ya mean.  If you didn't know the history, it's easy to say, "chill the fuck out, chucklefucks!"  BUT Stassi was soooo disgustingly heartless in the way she threw away Katie's friendship & cut her off.  It was really cruel.  I don't care what Stassi babbles in her defense or how much she cries.  Katie should cut her off & tell her to fuck off & leave her alone.  

 

Ah, but the chucklefucks don't do that.  The Toms forgive Jax for whatever asshole shit he does to them, so I guess Katie will eventually forgive Stassi, for the sake of the drama of the show?  I hope not.  Cuz it makes no sense.  If a supposed friend treats you horribly & fucks you over, you tell them to piss off & never see them again.  Right?  Well, these are the chucklefucks -- and they do so many things that make no sense so . . .

 

I want to know what Kristen did to get kicked outta SUR-

 

http://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/kristen-doute-confirms-she-was-kicked-out-of-pump-restaurant

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.  I feel lame when I say that it annoys me so much, I can't believe I'm still watching.  I make no apologies for the fact that I've been wanting someone to hand Stassi her ass on a platter for a long damn time, though - so this one was worth it.  (Yay, Schwartz! Until....)

It's just beyond annoying to watch yet another cast member who is so desperate to stay on the show, there's nothing recognizable left of their former selves.  Total sell-outs, they morph into characters and eventually settle to act as mere pawns in a game because they are so driven by their need for the fame, the money, or something to do with the endless amount of time on their hands.  First there was Kristen and now, Stassi.  Do these idiots truly believe than anyone is buying their load of shit?  Kristen is still batshit crazy and Stassi couldn't be less remorseful, but they'll both say the magic words (or in Kristen's case, hang out in the magic alley) in order to be around for yet another week.  The ever-repulsive Scheana belongs on that list next - she's an ignorant, sickeningly selfish bitch.  

 

I get that reality TV is not reality at all, but I do remember a time when there were more authentic moments than orchestrated ones. There used to be a couple of assholes in the bunch, but they were usually outnumbered by people to whom we could relate and would possibly even "like" if they were around in our real lives.   There are very few left (to my knowledge) about which I feel that is the case.  On the other hand, I think I appreciate real life assholes a little more?!

 

Spontaneous rant officially over.

Edited February 9, 2016 by straightshooter

[psychoticstate]

I'm trying to decide if Stassi coming back means this show is jumping the shark -- or if her presence will re-invigorate the show.  Not sure yet.  I like that she's coming back down & out (supposedly) & begging & pleading for everyone's friendship -- especially when she was so above-it-all & haughty & smug before.  My prob is I'm having a hard time believing her down & out routine.  She doesn't seem so down & out to me.  I'm thinking this crap is all made-up bullshit by the producers to stick her back on the show.  

 

Idk, producers' intervention doesn't bother me much if I'm entertained, so I'm willing to wait this out.  And If Schwartzie invited Stassi to the engagement party for our entertainment?  Well, then thanks Schwartzie & much appreciated.

 

As far as Kristen not acting nutsy enough?  Please.  Gurl is biding her time.  She's plenty nutsy.  I have no doubt her lunacy will bust thru soon.

 

You know, every time I see Brittany, I have the same thought -- why is this seemingly sensible young woman wasting her time on this ape-face loser?  OK, so Jax said he met her in Vegas.  Really, Jaxie-poo?  Um, no.  Ah, but this is Jaxie-poo & we know he lies about EVERYTHING, right?  Well, guess what?  He lied about this too.

 

http://nypost.com/2016/02/07/how-groupies-are-trawling-social-media-to-seduce-celebrities/

 

Thanks for that link, Scoob.  So I guess Brittney having no idea who Neanderthal Jax was is a bunch of b.s. 

 

As far as the episode description of her getting used to being the sole breadwinner, she'd better strap in and prepare for that to be the norm for her.  Her Hooters salary is going to go toward steroids and bail. 

 

What is wrong with Scheana and Lala?  Don't they know that all important conversations at Sur take place in the alley?  Funny how we see Lala answer the phone for reservations here and there but whenever she's having a discussion with someone, the phone never rings.

 

Whoever described DJ James at a demented Keebler Elf is right on the money.  Especially when he's wearing his wanna be gangsta white hoodie. 

 

And WTF with him claiming that he's still in love with Kristen?  Because nothing say true love like telling someone how much you hate them and how they will never have THIS again.  James needs to stop sniffing his hair gel or whatever else he's doing.

 

Katie's P&P (not to be confused with Jane Austen's P&P) party looked decent.  I've checked out her blog in the past and while it's actually decent, she doesn't post on the regular like she should if she's looking for sponsors and for it to be some kind of post-Sur career. 

 

I love Flat Iron and Schwartzie.  As much grief as I've given FI in the past, he does seem like a loyal friend (if not boyfriend.)  He's working Katie's party and pretty happily it appears.  And Schwartzie didn't panic! 

 

The slap down he gave StASSi was epic.  I may need to watch it again.

 

Heaven forbid we have a season of Rules without StASSi showing her bare ass. 

[politichick]

 

The slap down he gave StASSi was epic.  I may need to watch it again.

 

It so was, and I loved how he got all analytical and shit, talking about how Katie isn't even mad anymore; she's indifferent, which is way fucking worse. I like him a lot. I just wish he had more ambition and hope he has a trust fund or family business to fall back on. He seems so much better bred than the lot of them.

[Duke2801]

You know, every time I see Brittany, I have the same thought -- why is this seemingly sensible young woman wasting her time on this ape-face loser?  OK, so Jax said he met her in Vegas.  Really, Jaxie-poo?  Um, no.  Ah, but this is Jaxie-poo & we know he lies about EVERYTHING, right?  Well, guess what?  He lied about this too.

 

http://nypost.com/20...ce-celebrities/

 

 

NOT to defend Jax - because I mostly think he's reprehensible - buuuut he has admitted in seasons past to meeting girls/hookups on Instagram/social media. So it's not like he's ashamed of it - hey let's face it, he has NO shame! I am thinking that if he's downplaying the Instagram connection, it has to be for her benefit (maybe for the sake of her ultra conservative parents?)

 

They probably did first meet "face-to-face" in Vegas.  

[AbsoluteShower]

In next week's Vanderpump Rules, Hayes Pullard and the rest of the Jaguars pay a surprise visit to Sur, where they drag James out to the back alley and take it in turns to punch him repeatedly in the face while he cries for his mummy. For the full hour.

Edited February 10, 2016 by sharkfan

[ScoobieDoobs]

NOT to defend Jax - because I mostly think he's reprehensible - buuuut he has admitted in seasons past to meeting girls/hookups on Instagram/social media. So it's not like he's ashamed of it - hey let's face it, he has NO shame! I am thinking that if he's downplaying the Instagram connection, it has to be for her benefit (maybe for the sake of her ultra conservative parents?)

 

They probably did first meet "face-to-face" in Vegas.  

 

Yeah, that could be.  Still, I wonder why he didn't just say he met Brittany thru Instagram or whatever social media or app or site.  I don't especially care if they met that way, but I'm curious why Jax wasn't straight about it.  OC Tamra's scuzzy son Ryan casually told how he met his baby mama from Instagram.  So why not Jax?  They're both equally scuzzy.  No wait, Jax is way more scuzzy than Ryan -- and man, that ain't good.

 

Not sure why the NY Post is on fire about this show, but for some reason they are.  I was thinkin' Stassi is really looking pretty good lately -- especially compared to what she looked like 11 years ago.  Thank you (again) NY Post (which I otherwise can't stand)-

 

http://pagesix.com/2016/02/09/did-this-reality-star-shell-out-20k-on-plastic-surgery/?_ga=1.63789423.1578229990.1340949624

[Rosebud1970]

When James was whining in turn to Lala and then to Kristen about their lack of noticeable affection for him and they were each responding with their own versions of, 'Go away, ya botherin' me.' I kept saying to my TV, 'James, nobody cares about your boner.'

 

Because true.

[MV713]

No one else bothered by the Katie nose ring - "now you see it now you don't" horrific editing when they were all discussing the party plans?

One shot its there, next shot not, next shot its back.A

And speaking of it, she really should not wear that.  It just draws attention to her wide nose - literally its all I can focus on when they show her.

[SneakyCentipede]

When James was whining in turn to Lala and then to Kristen about their lack of noticeable affection for him and they were each responding with their own versions of, 'Go away, ya botherin' me.' I kept saying to my TV, 'James, nobody cares about your boner.'

 

Because true.

I love this so much I wish I could hug it

[walnutqueen]

When James was whining in turn to Lala and then to Kristen about their lack of noticeable affection for him and they were each responding with their own versions of, 'Go away, ya botherin' me.' I kept saying to my TV, 'James, nobody cares about your boner.'

 

Because true.

 

"James, nobody cares about your teeny tiny whiskey dick."  :-)

[HunterHunted]

When James was whining in turn to Lala and then to Kristen about their lack of noticeable affection for him and they were each responding with their own versions of, 'Go away, ya botherin' me.' I kept saying to my TV, 'James, nobody cares about your boner.'

 

Because true.

Because 2016 is the year of OJ, I watch James and his rage and entitlement towards women hope that he never achieves any measure of success because this behavior is only going to get worse if he become successful. It is interesting that James compares himself to Jax. Jax is an immature selfish douche, but at no time has he ever displayed the level of nasty abusive misogyny that James does.

[Ubiquitous]

No one else bothered by the Katie nose ring - "now you see it now you don't" horrific editing when they were all discussing the party plans?

One shot its there, next shot not, next shot its back.A

And speaking of it, she really should not wear that.  It just draws attention to her wide nose - literally its all I can focus on when they show her.

Plus, it's gross.

[ghoulina]

In next week's Vanderpump Rules, Hayes Pullard and the rest of the Jaguars pay a surprise visit to Sur, where they drag James out to the back alley and take it in turns to punch him repeatedly in the face while he cries for his mummy. For the full hour.

 

I would SO love this. Even if it is a bit of overkill. Heck, Giggy and Gordo could taken down Muppet Baby James. 

[Duke2801]

HunterHunted, on 10 Feb 2016 - 12:15 PM, said:

Because 2016 is the year of OJ, I watch James and his rage and entitlement towards women hope that he never achieves any measure of success because this behavior is only going to get worse if he become successful. It is interesting that James compares himself to Jax. Jax is an immature selfish douche, but at no time has he ever displayed the level of nasty abusive misogyny that James does.

 

Because "liking" this wasn't enough. I just needed to say A-MEN.

[Judi Sunshine]

On Twitter, Brittany said that the Post article is "BS." 

[heatherchandler]

It so was, and I loved how he got all analytical and shit, talking about how Katie isn't even mad anymore; she's indifferent, which is way fucking worse. I like him a lot. I just wish he had more ambition and hope he has a trust fund or family business to fall back on. He seems so much better bred than the lot of them.

 

Yeah I have wondered if he maybe has some family money or a trust fund.  He doesn't seem to be worried about lack of work or money.

[bblancobrnx]

No one else bothered by the Katie nose ring - "now you see it now you don't" horrific editing when they were all discussing the party plans?

One shot its there, next shot not, next shot its back.A

And speaking of it, she really should not wear that. It just draws attention to her wide nose - literally its all I can focus on when they show her.

Yeah I do not care for it either. I was disappointed when I noticed it in the first episode this season. At first I thought I was imagining things or that it was the camera angle, but then I saw it again in episode 2 and commented on it on here. I do not care for it on her. In fact I feel like there are few girls who can pull off that particular style of nose ring, but it looks really good on the ones who can...Katie is just not one of them. Shame really because she is so naturally beautiful and I think it detracts.

[WhosThatGirl]

I do love Lala's terrible stories of terrible high-school/junior high troubles we keep getting insight on. From the fact that apparently she was never invited to parties and had to hear about them the following Monday morning to how she did get invited to a party only for the kids to make her call her mom and watch her sit on the curb while she waited to be picked up.. I mean, yeah that's terrible but the kids could have done worse stuff to her; I was seriously waiting for Lala to say that they threw eggs at her ala Never Been Kissed style.. And also why is this still years and years affecting her this way? I mean, yeah it sucks that she isn't getting an invite to Katie's party but really.. she's holding onto to some stuff that makes me think she is emotionally stunted. Which she probably is, she works at SUR and most of them are, I just hope she has a good therapist. 

Edited February 11, 2016 by WhosThatGirl

[heatherchandler]

she's holding onto to some stuff that makes me think she is emotionally stunted. Which she probably is, she works at SUR and most of them are, I just hope she has a good therapist. 

 

True, she seems to be holding onto this stuff, BUT how old is she?  If she is 21 then high school is not that long ago.

 

Anyone else SO annoyed when Lisa calls Tom Schwartz "Schwartzie?"  It makes my skin crawl.  Like she's part of the gang, giving him a stupid nickname.  She can do no right in my eyes, so maybe that is why it bugs me so much, but oooohhh it is annoying.

[ghoulina]

True, she seems to be holding onto this stuff, BUT how old is she?  If she is 21 then high school is not that long ago.

 

I didn't think it was a high school story. I assumed the sleepover took place in elementary school, MAYBE middle. At any rate, she's 25. I believe it's probably been AT LEAST 10 years since she was rudely left out by the other girls. This shit happens every day. Lala is a beautiful girl, maybe it's her attitude that makes people want to avoid her. 

[nexxie]

Schwartz' takedown of Stassi was epic until he invited her to the engagement party.

So true! Loved it until he did that - I really hope Katie stays away from Stassi the Vampire.

Edited February 11, 2016 by nexxie

[nexxie]

They are acting as if Stassi set their kittens on fire.

I think maybe they just sense that Stassi doesn't have normal human emotions - zero empathy - and know to stay away.

[badlemonnohope]

That doesn't stop them from hanging with Jax though.

[blondiek237]

But Jax does not just cut people out, yes he does f'ed up things, but Stassi told Katie that she was done and then walked away.  Now that her (Stassi) life is crashing down around her, she wants Katie back.  She should have thought about that when she walked away.  I had a friend like Stassi and she too walked away, I see her from time to time (funerals etc) and we are friendly but I will never let her back in.  She was a bridesmaid at my first wedding yet I did not invite her to my second.  When someone walks out of your life with I am better than this--see ya, they do not get to turn around and just stroll back it and think a apology should be enough.

[Panda Bear]

No one else bothered by the Katie nose ring - "now you see it now you don't" horrific editing when they were all discussing the party plans?

One shot its there, next shot not, next shot its back.A

And speaking of it, she really should not wear that.  It just draws attention to her wide nose - literally its all I can focus on when they show her.

 

There are a lot of things Katie wears that she shouldn't. The pink outfit she had on for that party was really unflattering for her figure (no bra, really?) and that weird bikini she wore in Hawaii was another no-no. She's a pretty girl, but she doesn't seem to have a clue what looks good on her--not someone I'd take style advice from. 

 

Actually, I think Kristen Taekman is the only "style blogger" on Bravo who's genuinely stylish. 

Edited February 12, 2016 by Panda Bear

[Ubiquitous]

There are a lot of things Katie wears that she shouldn't. The pink outfit she had on for that party was really unflattering for her figure (no bra, really?) and that weird bikini she wore in Hawaii was another no-no. She's a pretty girl, but she doesn't seem to have a clue what looks good on her--not someone I'd take style advice from. 

Was it Katie who had that weird shade of orange hair?

[SFoster21]

Was it Katie who had that weird shade of orange hair?

Yes. And her current hairstyle is also unflattering. Too heavy for her face. I really wish she would try short hair that doesn't half cover her face, but I don't really care. She's such a boring person.

[tumamita]

I'm shocked how James speaks to women. Who raised him... savages!?

[jkitty]

I'm shocked how James speaks to women. Who raised him... savages!?

For me the problem is not that James speaks to women that way it's that he speaks to everyone that way. He has gone off on Tom Sandolval and Jax in the past. He is an animal with no control over his emotions and immediately goes as low as he can. He is offensive to watch and not in an entertaining way.

[becauseIsaidso]

Jax and James are really rather scarey; both are oversexed, misogynistic, arrogant sociopaths. The only thing that makes Jax slightly less scarey is that he is too stupid to really do much harm to any one other than himself - he'll most likely continue his thieving ways until he gets caught often enough and steals something valuable enough that not only will he not get off with just a slap on the wrist,  he'll get put away for years rather than days.  It makes me very angry when they are totally dismissive of anything any female says to or of them.. Jax reverts to the ever popular 'who cares' when he gets caught in a lie and/or confronted with his lying hypocrisy. James, on the other hand, is quick enough to immediately retaliate with an attack - attacking Lala for her sexual behavior immediately after getting called out on breaking the rules he had just agreed to and, even worse, claiming his employer would suffer a reduction in business if god-almighty-muppet-dj-james gets busted back to busboy. What I found to be particularly telling in his discussion with Lisa was when she mentioned how she gave James a job as busboy at James' mother's request. I have to wonder what kind of trouble he was in or on the verge of being busted for on the other side of the pond. The two of them, plus the addition of queen bitch stassi will probably have me pulling the plug on this show.

[OnceSane]

I also find James to be the creepier of the two. While Jax apparently has some weird charm that causes women (& some men) to buy his bullshit, James' ability to switch emotions like a fucking chameleon is terrifying. I fear for some poor, hapless girl who runs into him on the wrong night--he's the type to kiss you and call you "luv" one minute, and casually hack up your body for disposal the next. And those razor-sharp elbows are no joke; I bet they can slice like a katana.

[BogoGog24]

A lot of people think James might be doing some hard drugs. (Well they probably all are, tbh). But we've seen James go crazy with drinking and I suspect he's probably doing some kind of drug or multiple ones. Which would explain his behavior and erratic emotions all the time. He seems really paranoid.

[walnutqueen]

Paranoia.  Rage.  Grandiosity.  Hyper-sexuality + inability to complete.  Severely skinny.  Skin sores.  Desire to be mutilated during sex play..

 

Any questions?

[Ubiquitous]

A lot of people think James might be doing some hard drugs. (Well they probably all are, tbh). But we've seen James go crazy with drinking and I suspect he's probably doing some kind of drug or multiple ones. Which would explain his behavior and erratic emotions all the time. He seems really paranoid.

After watching the rerun last night, that thought crossed my mind as well. I cannot help there's more going on with StASSi and prosperous philanthropic Lisa Vanderbucks as well. There seemed to be a lot of unspoken things in that convo.

[Teddybear]

Excuse the article and pictures of Brandi….I'm posting this link so you guys can see the atrocity of Lala's "outfit" (Tom's is rather questionable as well).  Scroll down to see them.  Yikes.  

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3445764/It-bizarre-thing-Brandi-Glanville-wows-lace-talks-LeAnn-Rimes-ex-Dean-Sheremet-moment-spouses-fell-love.html

[tinaw]

Omg! who the hell dresses these people? That's some scary stuff going on

[BogoGog24]

I guess Lala got confused and thought she was going to a Halloween party.

[HunterHunted]

Excuse the article and pictures of Brandi….I'm posting this link so you guys can see the atrocity of Lala's "outfit" (Tom's is rather questionable as well).  Scroll down to see them.  Yikes.  

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3445764/It-bizarre-thing-Brandi-Glanville-wows-lace-talks-LeAnn-Rimes-ex-Dean-Sheremet-moment-spouses-fell-love.html

Lala looks like Annalynne "Drunkface" McCord. She looks like she was getting drunk and banging her secret boyfriend in the limo over to the event. I don't love Tom's outfit, but he has a singular sense of style that is easily identifiable. It is funny that Katie is the one with a fashion blog. She and Scheana have the worst senses of style.

[Ubiquitous]

I guess Lala got confused and thought she was going to a Halloween party.

My guess is Lala got mugged on the way to the event.

[FozzyBear]

I would take the Anti-Stassi thing more seriously if they weren't all routinely horrible to each other. Stassi's a bitch, but so is everyone else (I still think Kristen and Katie were horrible friends to her during the S1 Jax break up. I might have cut them out of my life over inviting my ex to my birthday trip and lying about it). I would also take Katie's anger much more seriously if I didn't think it was 75% Scheena whispering in her ear. Katie's such a follower. She reminded me of Aidrianna from The Hills without the rampant manipulation.

[ghoulina]

I totally agree with you about Scheana. I've noticed that about Katie for awhile now. She needs a HBIC to tell her what to think and who to hate. It's kind of pathetic.