Janelle Brown: Smarter Than Your Average Brown (Maybe)

[ginger90]

[DakotaJustice]

This is creative? I guess she's cleaning out the pantry for her impending move.

Edited May 28, 2021 by DakotaJustice

[laurakaye]

Taco salad or taco bowl - she doesn't know?  Isn't it the same thing?  I'm shocked that she didn't tell us to Google the damn recipe ourselves.

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

So Janelle should rent Christine's house and Christine can then move back to UUUUTaaahhhh without her mahn

[laurakaye]

43 minutes ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

So Janelle should rent Christine's house and Christine can then move back to UUUUTaaahhhh without her mahn

This is brilliant and logical, so it would never fly with the Browns.  But if it did, and they filmed it for season 16?  I'm there.

But only if Meri has to move in with Janelle, for some reason.  Maybe Meri's rennal will sell out from under her too?

Basically I need to see some iteration of these women moving back in together.  We deserve it. :)

Edited May 28, 2021 by laurakaye

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

5 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

This is brilliant and logical, so it would never fly with the Browns.  But if it did, and they filmed it for season 16?  I'm there.

But only if Meri has to move in with Janelle, for some reason.  Maybe Meri's rennal will sell out from under her too?

Basically I need to see some iteration of these women moving back in together.  We deserve it. :)

Now that I would watch, can you imagine all the foot stomping, door slamming and heavy sighs from Meri, while Janelle is messing up the kitchen burning asparagus on her rusted baking pans and taking photos of her food on her chipped plates 

[Joan of Argh]

9 hours ago, ginger90 said:

What’s all that white stuff?

I’m guessing she dumped a tub of sour cream over her beans... either that or a bottle of ranch dressing... kind of sneaky how she cropped the picture to cut that portion out 

[Twopper]

9 hours ago, DakotaJustice said:

This is creative? I guess she's cleaning out the pantry for her impending move

for her, yes, I guess it may be creative. 

I make taco salad fairly frequently, although without pre-seasoned  refried beans.

It cracks me up when she talks about 'sneaking veggies in; it reminds me of the hints to get little kids to eat more veggies like putting grated carrots in spaghetti sauce.

Can she not proofread her posts or at least go back and edit?  I think she means "keep me feeling good."

This woman is not in a good relationship with veggies.  Is she trying to sneak them in so she won't have to acknowledge their presence in her meal?  Wouldn't it make more sense to talk about "adding more veggies" rather than sneaking them in?     I do not understand this woman.

[ginger90]

2 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

What’s all that white stuff?

I’m guessing she dumped a tub of sour cream over her beans... either that or a bottle of ranch dressing... kind of sneaky how she cropped the picture to cut that portion out 

I had to resize it to post with the text. Here’s the original:

[deirdra]

At least the lettuce, tomato & onion are not wilted or decomposing.  That's a first.  And yes, that looks like ~4 tablespoons of mayo or sour cream that she is trying to hide under those vegetables.

[ginger90]

Her best food picture, because it’s not hers:

 

 

 

 

Edited May 29, 2021 by ginger90

[ginger90]

[Sandy W]

Was Janelle "dosing off" at her desk from too much chocolate or dozing off once her cravings were satisfied?

[xwordfanatik]

The picture actually looks pretty good, for Janelle.

The message?  Total MLM bullshit.

"Dosing" LOL.

[ginger90]

Dosing! 🤦‍♀️🤣

So many possibilities. Slang is great.....LSD comes to mind.

[Joan of Argh]

9 minutes ago, xwordfanatik said:

The picture actually looks pretty good, for Janelle.

The message?  Total MLM bullshit.

"Dosing" LOL.

I hope Janelle posts a pic of HER version of that Pinterest recipe 😂

 

[ginger90]

Just now, Joan of Argh said:

I hope Janelle posts a pic of HER version of that Pinterest recipe 😂

 

I certainly will let you know. 😁

[Joan of Argh]

1 minute ago, ginger90 said:

I certainly will let you know. 😁

I can’t wait!  😂

It brings to mind that old Sesame Street song....

“🎵 One of these things is not like the other 🎶  One of these things is not quite the same 🎶🎵” 

[MargeGunderson]

With all of the bullshit in that post, the one that stands out to me most is that she claims to be at work. 

[iwantcookies]

7 hours ago, ginger90 said:

I rather nap than take plexus.
 

If she is sleeping at 3 pm she either got sleep apnea or she eats too much. 

Work haha haha. 
 

 

[DakotaJustice]

Bathroom issues... I can't unsee that toilet stool from the rennal house listing. 

[iwantcookies]

19 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

I hope Janelle posts a pic of HER version of that Pinterest recipe 😂

 

It will NOT look appetizing! It will be brown and look like the leaning  tower of Pisa. 

[TurtlePower]

20 hours ago, ginger90 said:

It’s always some gimmick with her. Janelle doesn’t have the fortitude to go through processed food withdrawals when quitting a processed diet and switching to a whole foods one. 

Advice to Janelle: You’ve had years, love. YEARS. It’s always some new gimmick that eventually gets shelved and you’ve got nothing to show for your efforts. It’s not working. You know what you need to do, but you keep reaching for magic elixirs. 

Elixirs and magic potions won’t work. Janelle, you need a whole-food, plant-heavy diet with grass-fed protein sources. Give up dairy and added sugar. It will be difficult at first, but after a while—and it may take more than a month—you will prefer these foods to processed ones. And you will lose weight without really trying. This is the diet our bodies thrive on. 

People are tired of hearing about gimmick after gimmick and seeing no progress.

Edited May 30, 2021 by TurtlePower

[Persnickety1]

20 hours ago, ginger90 said:

What, she didn't hash tag "bathroom issues"?   🚽

[iwantcookies]

29 minutes ago, Persnickety1 said:

What, she didn't hash tag "bathroom issues"?   🚽

That’s for the next post.

 

She should sell the bathroom chairs instead. She might actually make $. Squatty potty???

Edited May 30, 2021 by iwantcookies

[deirdra]

18 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

If she is sleeping at 3 pm she either got sleep apnea or she eats too much. 

Too much sugar & starch and not enough protein.

[Pickleinthemiddle]

4 hours ago, deirdra said:

Too much sugar & starch and not enough protein.

I would imagine it is both.  Too many carbs and sleep apena.  Or, it could be she just doesn't get enough sleep.  Or all three.

[jojo3couleurs]

On 5/29/2021 at 10:09 PM, iwantcookies said:

I rather nap than take plexus.
 

If she is sleeping at 3 pm she either got sleep apnea or she eats too much. 

 

 

 or diabetes

 

or all of the above!

 

Janelle should read this book... it changed my life!  (and not by making me drink some controversial and expensive pink stuff)

[ginger90]

[Sandy W]

Not sure I could confront that for breakfast but on the plus side, the bowl doesn't appear to have chips and her nail is clean.

[TurtlePower]

7 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

Not sure I could confront that for breakfast but on the plus side, the bowl doesn't appear to have chips and her nail is clean.

It looks good to me minus the shrimp. I love veggie-heavy breakfasts, although mine are often closer to lunch due to my morning workouts (and not wanting to throw them up mid-session). 

[Persnickety1]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

Oh, for fuck's sake, Janelle.

Shrimp and grits is one of my favorite dishes and you just bastardized it with that grotesque picture of some slop that doesn't even resemble properly prepared shrimp and grits.  😭

***I'VE GOT IT!  STRIVE by Janelle is really quite brilliant, because looking at her food pictures totally kills the viewers' appetites, thus leading to weight loss.  

On a serious note, I cannot believe the shit that women shoves down her gobbler and thinks it's delicious.  🤢

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

This is exactly why I snark on her so much.. Why not do an egg white omelet with veggies, yet she is cooking something most of us would have for dinner or lunch. No wonder she is dosing at 3pm. Aren't you supposed to stay away from spicy foods if you have digestion issues ? Keep shoveling it in Janelle and of course she won't have to run to a vending machine or gas station, she already has that in her house. 

[Rabbit Hutch]

That doesn't look like any kind of shrimp and grits I've ever had, but to each his own, I guess.  Don't usually think about having them for breakfast either, as they are usually spiced up to the roof. Janelle does look like she's lost some weight, though.

[BradandJanet]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

Does she wash that down with a glass of Plexus? #throwsupinthekitchen

I'm curious to see if Plexus really clears her brain fog. If she lifts up her head one afternoon and realizes she's wasting her life with Kody and packs up and leaves, there might be something to that pink drink. 

[ginger90]

[iwantcookies]

“Just go back to the couch “

Girl like you ever leave the couch for long 🤣

Well long enough to use the squatty potty 

 

I don’t know why I cannot forget about that squatty potty 

Edited June 2, 2021 by iwantcookies

[Persnickety1]

I guess those gallons of Plexus she drinks don't ward off bronchitis nor that pantry chock full of elderberry syrup she posted about a few months back.  

Janelle may have the most mundane life of anybody with "Z-list" celebrity status.  

[Pickleinthemiddle]

Were they sick from covid?  Or did they catch something from Maddie's kids?  Kids that age that attend day care or school are constantly sick.  Then with Janelle and Savannah practically sheltering in place, they might not have been exposed to anything for over a year.  

As for not wanting to go to the gym, I know how she feels.  Which is why I got rid of my membership once the contract went out years ago.  If I have the time, I ride my bike in the garage or go for a walk.  She is right next to numerous hiking trails where she could get a decent workout.  Plus be out in the fresh air.  Just needs to use zinc on her face and neck, wear long sleeves and pants, and a large hat.  I feel 100% better when I have time to get a good hour walk in.

[DakotaJustice]

I don't consider Janelle or Savannah as SIP since they've been traveling to see Maddie - I assume on planes and in airports. 

[deirdra]

Is this the second time in over a year that she has been to the gym?  I recall her last visit to the gym involved similar posts.  To avoid the heat and too many UV rays, in summer I go for a walk or hike early in the day before everyone else is out and about.  The peace and quiet and nature is a great way start to the day, and more energizing than any pink drink (banned in Canada so I cannot test this hypothesis, but I haven't felt the need to dose myself with a chemical energizer to cut down on "dosing" in the afternoon).

Edited June 2, 2021 by deirdra

[TurtlePower]

2 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

“Just go back to the couch “

Girl like you ever leave the couch for long 🤣

Well long enough to use the squatty potty 

 

I don’t know why I cannot forget about that squatty potty 

THIS. 

[CalicoKitty]

3 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

 

 

I don’t know why I cannot forget about that squatty potty 

My cat uses mine a a bench when she keeps me company in the bathroom. It is her personal seat to watch me brush my teeth and comb my hair.

 

[MargeGunderson]

It’s sad that after all these years of going to the gym (at least so she says) that she’s still either nervous/scared to go, or doesn’t feel like going. That’s just not what anyone wants to hear from a health coach. How does she not get that?

[Cetacean]

It took them both a MONTH to feel better from bronchitis?  A teen in apparently otherwise good health?  That doesn't make sense.

[ginger90]

12 minutes ago, Cetacean said:

It took them both a MONTH to feel better from bronchitis?  A teen in apparently otherwise good health?  That doesn't make sense.

It took them a month to “feel like we were good to go workout”. 
So, an excuse? Imagine? 
 

Meanwhile......Plexus.

Edited June 2, 2021 by ginger90

[iwantcookies]

Jenelle just proved Plexus isn’t a miracle cure 🤣. 

Should I buy some pink drink from Jill Rodrigues or Janelle? 

[TurtlePower]

14 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

It’s sad that after all these years of going to the gym (at least so she says) that she’s still either nervous/scared to go, or doesn’t feel like going. That’s just not what anyone wants to hear from a health coach. How does she not get that?

Right? I’ve been wondering this for years also. She always sounds very timid, frightened and unsure. Her demeanour reminds me of a covey of quail—these birds always act like the sky is falling, chirping nervously and skittering about. 

Janelle had success once when she had her own coach pushing her. She is not a good coach for anyone else because she can barely motivate herself to stick to a healthy lifestyle. It makes my eyes roll every time she posts something—Janelle doesn’t inspire confidence. 

I cannot believe she continues with this Strive farce. It’s more like “Struggle with Janelle”. 

[Sandy W]

33 minutes ago, TurtlePower said:

Right? I’ve been wondering this for years also. She always sounds very timid, frightened and unsure. Her demeanour reminds me of a covey of quail—these birds always act like the sky is falling, chirping nervously and skittering about. 

Janelle had success once when she had her own coach pushing her. She is not a good coach for anyone else because she can barely motivate herself to stick to a healthy lifestyle. It makes my eyes roll every time she posts something—Janelle doesn’t inspire confidence. 

I cannot believe she continues with this Strive farce. It’s more like “Struggle with Janelle”. 

We all have our strengths and weaknesses and by her age, Janelle should know hers.  She pursued a real estate career for over 7 years, not even earning enough to cover her annual licensing and board fees, and for several years has been promoting herself as a health and fitness guru without any self-awareness of how ridiculous she comes across.  She took on the challenge of birthing 6 kids, then left the responsibility of nurturing them to Christine and to a great extent, Logan the first born.  She purports herself as a financial whiz, yet the Brown family *finite resources* that she shares dominion over with Kody, are a disaster. 

How frustrating it must be to consistently meet with failure on these life challenges she has been swept along to engage in.  It may not be too late in life to subject herself to some in-depth personality analysis to find a path she could follow with the reward of a sense of accomplishment.  We all know it won't be in the fields of crafting projects or menu planning, but surely there is something she could do and do it well.

[laurakaye]

16 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

It’s sad that after all these years of going to the gym (at least so she says) that she’s still either nervous/scared to go, or doesn’t feel like going. That’s just not what anyone wants to hear from a health coach. How does she not get that?

So much this.  Her post was actually decently-written (for a change) and something a lot of people can probably relate to if they're embarking on a new gym membership - but not someone who has been to gyms off and on for the past 20 years and purports to be a health coach!  Putting yourself out there and going to a gym or a yoga studio can certainly be intimidating, for sure - but after awhile you begin to understand that no one is looking at you or judging you, they are too busy doing their own thing.  This knowledge comes with age and experience, and Janelle has both.  It's like she is putting these excuses out there to convince herself not to do the hard things so when she doesn't lose the weight (ever), she can fall back on those ready-made reasons for why nothing works for her.