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S03.E05: I'm Ironing The Captain's Shorts


OnceSane
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Rocky puts Emile in the "friend zone" following their less-than-scintillating date. Also: Drama surrounds Kate when she fails to provision a special bottle of tequila for charter guests; a new deckhand arrives; and girlfriend issues distract Eddie.

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Okay, this guest opening his beer bottles with his teeth is gross.  He's only doing it for attention.  At one point he ripped the beer bottle open with his teeth and looked directly at the camera to make sure they filmed him.  Dumb.  Hope he see how stupid he really looks.

 

Rocky continues to annoy me with her TH's.  I can't even watch them.

 

Why is the crew always barefoot?  Every one of them.....except maybe Chef Beefcheeks.

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Every now and then Connie gets into a scene in the background reminds me, hey, she's on this show.  We don't know much about her except that she loves fishing. And camo.  Not much else.

She has fake teeth too.

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Why is the crew always barefoot?  Every one of them.....except maybe Chef Beefcheeks.

The passengers go barefoot too.  It's to keep the flooring/deck from getting marked/scratched/dented.  I'm guessing chefs are exempt because they're doing knifework.  Captain Lee is often shown in deck shoes (i.e. non-marking soles) and we saw Kat running around in slippers last season.

Edited by crabbypants
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What the hell was the deal with the Don Julio 42? The one guy seemed like he'd be happier vacationing in a liquor store than on a yacht, and that appears to have started well before cabin fever should have had time to set in.

 

Not ordering it ahead of time was the first professional misstep I've seen Kate make. All of the passengers listing it on their request forms should have tipped her off it was important to have it on hand, though no one could have predicted the degree to which their happiness depended on having that particular brand of tequila.

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I'll preface this with although Dane is not my type, nor am I a fan of long hair, I'm not going to fault others for thinking he is cute. However, I can appreciate Kate and Amy maintains professional and admiring from afar versus Rocky essentially jumping on him the moment he set foot on the boat.

Eddie, I will not break your heart, I will not distract you while you are out on the yacht... So call me maybe?

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Okay, so even though I DVR'ed this episode I kind of fell asleep for a bit.  I woke up / came to just as they were zoning in on the new deckhand's face.  I thought "Is that a young Caitlyn Jenner?" (ducking now to avoid flying objects).  I mean, I guess it was just the weird angle his head was tilted at the time but I don't see the hotness.  To top things off, jumping in the hot tub with the guests?  WTH.  I never worked on a charter yacht but common sense would tell me that doing something like that would be a huge no-no.  And I absolutely snorted with laughter when D/Zane sashayed past the galley's kitchen counter in his board shorts and swiped the bowl of chips to take up to the hot tub without missing a beat.  Funny!

 

So next week's preview looks like Captain Lee tells one of the deckhands to go home?  Man, I hope it's "I am Cait, Jr."...  Damn you Bravo, me, Connie, Rocky, Amy, and Kate want a seriously HOT deckhand replacement.  Dane's body just looked ... soft and white.  No thank you.

Edited by beesknees
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Rocky continues to annoy me with her TH's.  I can't even watch them.

 

 

They should make her wear a neck brace during her THs!

 

I love Eddie and Captain Lee in the hot tub having a little man to man conversation! So cute.

 

 

I loved Capt. Lee saying how his wife knows not to put any pressure on him about work ... while he's in the hot tub drinking whiskey and smoking a cigar. I knew what he meant, but still ...

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To me (and YMMV), new dude was trying to pull off a Matthew McConaughey vibe, especially with the female guests.

Eh. None of these dudes do it for me, but Captain Lee does bring the funny.

And I wasnt all that intrigued by the Aspen show. Making a snap judgment, it looks like a mix of the worst parts of Below Deck and Vanderpump Rules.

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Well, Rockey's one and done. I'm calling it now.

I thought Kate said the guest did not put Don Julio on his preference sheet. Did I hear wrong? I was multitasking during the show.

Captain Lee continues to bring the funny with his smart remarks.

New guy isn't cute. He looked better in his talking heads but not by much. So far, this season isn't interesting to me.

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Well, Rockey's one and done. I'm calling it now.

 

Oh, please don't jinx us!  Actually, I think that the only way she'll be one and done is if she decides not to return because I seriously fear that the producers/casting of this show love the brand of "crazy" and "flirtatiousness" she brings.  But I hate, hate, hate watching her.  UGH!  I realized tonight that part of the reason I can't stand her TH with her eyes all over the place is because it makes us constantly see the whites of her eyes, which really creeps me out.

 

I'm on board the "Zane is not cute" train, too.  But to each their own.  

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Oh, please don't jinx us! Actually, I think that the only way she'll be one and done is if she decides not to return because I seriously fear that the producers/casting of this show love the brand of "crazy" and "flirtatiousness" she brings. But I hate, hate, hate watching her. UGH! I realized tonight that part of the reason I can't stand her TH with her eyes all over the place is because it makes us constantly see the whites of her eyes, which really creeps me out.

I'm on board the "Zane is not cute" train, too. But to each their own.

After watching WWHL, I guarantee that Andy is not a Rocky fan.

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Okay, this guest opening his beer bottles with his teeth is gross.  He's only doing it for attention.  At one point he ripped the beer bottle open with his teeth and looked directly at the camera to make sure they filmed him.  Dumb.  Hope he see how stupid he really looks.

 

Rocky continues to annoy me with her TH's.  I can't even watch them.

 

Why is the crew always barefoot?  Every one of them.....except maybe Chef Beefcheeks.

 

I cringed every time he opened a bottle.  One of these days he's going to get a surprise when part of one or more of his teeth pops out with the beer cap.

 

As someone else posted, it's about marring the floor inside the cabin and most importantly scuffing the deck.  If you ever been to a boat show, people take their shoes off before climbing aboard....unless you're wearing boat shoes. 

 

I agree with another poster who stated that Rocky needs to wear a neck brace.  God, it drives me crazy. 

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After watching WWHL, I guarantee that Andy is not a Rocky fan.

 

Why, what did he say/do about Rocky?  Unfortunately, it probably doesn't matter what Andy thinks because I don't believe "Below Deck" is one of the few shows he kept producer control over when he left Bravo to form his own production company.

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And I wasnt all that intrigued by the Aspen show. Making a snap judgment, it looks like a mix of the worst parts of Below Deck and Vanderpump Rules.

 

I agree, but, just like I got sucked into these two shows, I'll probably get sucked into that one, too!   :-)

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Dane the deckhand isn't all that good looking, but there is an aura of some kind of cool about him - I don't know, sort of "Southern Charm" crossed with California surfer dude....I'm curious to see more about him, though.

 

Stupid move going to join the guests in the hot tub, but I think that was a producer-driven scene.  

 

Emile needs to figure out how to handle his liquor - he was smashed on their night off.  Rocky is a cocktease, imo, although I thought she looked very pretty in a 1940-ish kind of way with the red lipstick.  I'm sooo over the upward eye look!!!  

 

And, after hearing her sing, I'm definitely thinking she had professional training of some sort.  She actually has a fair voice, and sounded very Broadway-esque when she was singing.  

 

Kate and Leon - wow - can't wait for the showdown.  I think Kate's going to win that one.  I'm not a fan of Leon's.  When the clients ask for filet mignon and you give them beef cheeks, that is just not right.  I would be pretty pissed off, if I was the charter guest, although the lead passenger seemed to be a little tacky.  Opening beer bottles with your teeth?  Who, besides frat boys, thinks that is a cool thing to do?  

 

Don Julio 1942 is a pretty high end tequila, and I don't think a lot of average liquor stores carry it.  I think that these guests just threw that in to make it sound like they were high-class.  What proved them wrong was the fact that they were "doing shots".  Tequila of that caliber is meant to be sipped and savored, like a well-aged scotch, not thrown down your throat for the purpose of getting drunk.  They should have stuck to the Patron for that purpose.

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Don Julio 1942 is a pretty high end tequila, and I don't think a lot of average liquor stores carry it.  I think that these guests just threw that in to make it sound like they were high-class.  What proved them wrong was the fact that they were "doing shots".  Tequila of that caliber is meant to be sipped and savored, like a well-aged scotch, not thrown down your throat for the purpose of getting drunk.  They should have stuck to the Patron for that purpose.

 

I thought it was the opening beer bottles with his teeth that gave it away.

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Dane the deckhand isn't all that good looking, but there is an aura of some kind of cool about him - I don't know, sort of "Southern Charm" crossed with California surfer dude....I'm curious to see more about him, though.

 

I honestly think that he might be one of those guys who isn't photogenic, but in real life is pretty attractive for whatever reason.

 

I wonder if the charter guests are afraid of being the asshole who undertips? I feel like the tips have been generally good in season 2 and season 3, as opposed to season 1 where it seemed like they bitched all the time about the tips.

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I thought Kate said the guest did not put Don Julio on his preference sheet. Did I hear wrong?

It was requested.

 

Kate says, "I've noticed guests put a lot of things on the preference sheet that they never ask for, so if something's difficult to get, I'm not going to bend over backwards, with our short amount of time.  But now that Kevin's here and asking for it, I realize it's important."

 

Mm-hmm, doesn't sound too bad--except several guests requested that particular label, the Captain remarked on it at the meeting and Amy assumes in her TH that it must have been accidentally left off the provision order.  It doesn't even occur to her that Kate just blew it off.

 

***

I paused to read the two preference sheets from a couple of the 'minor' guests.  One of them says her preferred coffee is "House Blend."  Hee.

Edited by candall
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How far in advance did they get the preference sheet?  From what it seems it's the day before, so Kate didn't necessarily have a lot of unused lead time to search out that particular brand of tequila. 

 

I didn't get a vibe on WWHL that Andy isn't a fan of Rocky, but I probably was distracted because he was so grossly over-the-top with his lust for Emile.  

 

I can't wait to see an interview with Connie someday.  She seems amusing, and observant, and I feel like it'd be awesome.

 

Man, I enjoy this show in the moment but I can't think of anything to say about it when it's done.  So weird, and hypnotic apparently.

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About the Leon and Kate dinner skirmish: I was half asleep, but I thought there was a quick shot of her telling Leon "the guests are on their way back (from shore) and will be here in 20 minutes." I guess he still should have waited to assess whether they were ready for dinner, but perhaps he misinterpreted what Kate was saying.

 

Eddie must be addicted to relationship drama.

 

Rocky definitely has showbiz experience or training. Those tunes she was belting sounded pretty good.

 

How many charters a week do they do - two or three?

 

ETA: Kate must have taken note at the backlash over her behavior in earlier seasons. She's working hard to remain civil, at least on camera.

Edited by pasdetrois
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Aren't the average charters 3 days or so?

 

I suppose it's a good thing Not-Patton Oswalt has enough money to buy new teeth when his originals get destroyed by the beer bottlecaps. Maybe he can get metal ones like the guy in the Bond movies.

 

Rocky apparently has a "MINE!" reaction to every new guy she comes in contact with. Her repeated comments about Eddie are giving me a sense of foreboding; I hope he doesn't hit a low enough point in his relationship drama to ignore her array of red flags. I also wish Emile were smart enough to completely blow her off now that she's set her sights on Matthew McDoppelganger, it would likely drive her up the wall.

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I'm with Amy, I much prefer Rodgers and Hammerstein Rocky over Weeping and Wailing and Rending of Garments Rocky.

Although it's the difference of dislike over abhor.

And, note to self, if that is the end result, never, ever drink "1942"!

Ever.

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Aren't the average charters 3 days or so?

 

It does look like that.

 

So if the tip is $1500 per employee, that's pretty good money for their effort.  And no income tax on those envelopes full of cash.

 

Imagine making $500/day, food and room without taxes.

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It was pretty obnoxious all the whining the guests did over the "1942" not being available, but then the primary was so excited when some was delivered to the boat that I softened up about it.  I guess it really WAS that important, for some reason.  To me, tequila tastes horrible no matter how much it costs, but I'm not a bazillionaire, so maybe I've just never lived the real tequila life that costs $350 a bottle.

 

I'm going to be shocked if Eddie and his girlfriend make a comeback from where they are at this point in the show.  Once someone has cheated, and then isn't fully engaged or enthusiastic in working on their part of the relationship to make amends, it's pretty much over.  Maybe she doesn't want to break up with him over the phone, so she still goes through the motions of their calls even though she has basically disconnected herself.

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I don't ordinarily buy lottery tickets--except one time the prize was $500 per week.  The perfect amount.  Not such a huge pile you'd have to move to a gated community or strongarm strangers at the grocery store, but still sufficient to step up your quality of life and be generous with gifts for others.  Or, with willpower, you could bank for something bigger.

 

That's what these extravagant tips feel like to me--modest lottery winnings.

 

I wonder if this show has caused a slew of young people to consider heading off to work their way up the yachtie ladder?

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Include me in those who don't find Dane attractive. The hair and his face remind me of Weird Al lol

Also count me in with those annoyed by the primary constantly opening bottles with his teeth. Ew.

I think if someone is going to get sent home next week it might be Emile, not Rocky. Rocky might be an annoying lunatic but in this last episode she showed signs of improvement in her work and has a better attitude about it now (let's see how long she can keep it up though). She hasn't exactly done anything worthy of getting kicked off.

Emile, on the other hand, seems to be screwing up a lot on the deck. He acts very immature a lot of the time. I could see him getting booted.

I don't understand why if Eddie says his relationship stresses him out so much that they don't just break up. Why would you want to stay with someone who cheated on you anyway? That's a sign of someone with low self esteem.

I kind of wonder if Dane joining the guests in the hot tub was a producer driven thing. He seemed confused as to what the protocol was- perhaps producers told him to go join them, but crew told him no. He was probably unsure of who to listen to because technically both are his bosses and probably doesn't know if this is more of a TV show than a real yachting job or vice versa. He also said he had worked on boats since he was a kid and every boat has different rules and ways of doing things (although I can't imagine any boat would say it's ok to schmooze with guests) but who knows, maybe he has in the past.

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Well, I'm not going to have to compete for TV boyfriends, because I think Eddie is middle of the road, Emile is unattractive and Dane is cute. Although, since folks pointed out the Matthew McConaughey thing, he's going to be on probation with me. I also think Leon is nice looking, it's just cancelled out by his personality. Not even him saying his daughters were the center of his world made me warm to him.

 

I don't mind Rocky. I'm thinking she's playing a part, trying to fill the vacancy left by Kat. Since she's not Kat, she's ok in my book. I'd still like to see less of her and more of Connie. But she's smart, funny, competent and drama free, so I imagine she'll remain stuck in the background.

 

I wanted to slap the primary charter guest every time he did his beer bottle trick, but the one I really disliked was the guy who was extra unpleasant about the lack of the overpriced tequila. If you can't have a good time on a yacht without booze, the problem isn't the staff. Also hated primary complaining/boasting about how much money his wife would spend in the shops. Money is like sex; those who really have it don't talk about it.

 

I'm pretty sure Leon was told the guests would be arriving in 20 minutes. To me, that would mean he should be prepping the food, not firing it before the guests were even on board.

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more like when you cross disney with disney.

..............and inbred for seven generations.

I don't know too much about bipolar disorder but, she seems to be either way up crazy, or weeping. I get the feeling she goes through boyfriends like tissues. Her "I want a MAAAN shtick....ugh. I thought her dismissiveness of Emile was odd too. 

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I didn't get a vibe on WWHL that Andy isn't a fan of Rocky, but I probably was distracted because he was so grossly over-the-top with his lust for Emile.  

 

 

I got a vibe that he doesn't like Kate all that much. He was relentless with the botox conversation with her. Even if what he was saying was true, She was not amused. 

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Thanks PP for the info about 1942. I haaate tequila (it was my first wasted/horrible hangover experience in college). My husband has tried to convince me some are good and "smooth," but I can't do a shot of one at this point, because just the smell gets me dry heaving. So anyway, I don't know what's "good" tequila. Interesting that it's meant to be sipped. I'm guessing the primary is new money and has found this really expensive tequila. He's rich now, so he drinks/eats/uses all the expensive things. That's what rich people do. His friends feel high class when they drink/eat/use the expensive things. So there are token products, like 1942, that new money people order to show how rich and high class they are. That's the only reason I could think that they were SO intent on getting that particular brand and could not go three days without it and why every single guest asked for it. And the explanation that they were shooting a drink that is one to be sipped and savored convinces me of that. Not that there's anything wrong with that or how he chooses to spend his money, but it makes sense.

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