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Say What?: Commercials That Made Us Scratch Our Heads


Lola16
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OK, I seriously had to think about this one for a long time. Way longer than is healthy/necessary. That damn Chrissy Teigan commercial about her having to choose which phone to use....at the end she asks if they would censor her dog's nipples.

Man, I hate that commercial.  I start flailing around for the remote as soon as it starts.  It seems like every Samsung phone commercial is pissing me off lately.

 

Okay, I know I'm both old and paranoid, but the phone's built-in live broadcasting capability sounds like a bad idea.  It lets the user stream live to YouTube.  Other phones have similar capabilities for apps like Periscope.  Butt dialing is bad enough.  So is freely running your mouth after you mistakenly believe you've hung up on the other person.  Accidentally streaming your life onto the internet... not appealing to me.   But, I'm not into social media at all.

 

In case you haven't already seen the commercial:

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I hadn't seen either ad until now. Do you have a link to the short version? TIA.

Afraid not, I couldn't find the ones airing in my viewing area online. Even the 30 second ads have song clips that sort of let you know what's going on, but I think they pare the soundtrack away for the super-short ones and it's all voiceover naming the product.

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I can't find it online, but a Hallmark commercial came on during every break while I watched Project Runway on the Lifetime app yesterday. It was for their new Signature cards line, which I would know nothing about were they not shoehorned into a challenge last week on PR.

In the commercial, three white women sit around a table and gingerly make the cards using various craft supplies like string, glitter and sequins. The thing that makes me go, "Say what?" is that I'm pretty sure that's not the setting nor pace at which these cards are being made. It's just weird that we're supposed to believe that the weekly wives' coffee klatsche is making thousands of identical cards at a snail's pace.

When you described the ad, I remembered that my stepmom makes cards as a hobby with materials similar to those who scrapbook and wondered if Hallmark was opening an arts 'n' crafts line with which you make your own personalized cards.

 

 

I was wondering WTF was going on in the Three Olives vodka commercial with the guy who flashes yellow eyes and fangs until I saw the full length version online that makes it clear the theme is "werewolves of London":

Did no one at the company realize that cutting it down to a 15-second blipvert where you can't hear the song also results in it making no sense?

I've seen that ad a few times and it included the song, although I have no idea why werewolves would drink vodka. I figured they'd prefer something more working class.

 

 

Okay, I know I'm both old and paranoid, but the phone's built-in live broadcasting capability sounds like a bad idea.  It lets the user stream live to YouTube.  Other phones have similar capabilities for apps like Periscope.  Butt dialing is bad enough.  So is freely running your mouth after you mistakenly believe you've hung up on the other person.  Accidentally streaming your life onto the internet... not appealing to me.   But, I'm not into social media at all.

Yeah, that sounds like an accident (or embarrassing hacking incident) waiting to happen!

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Scratch my head, so KFC has replaced Darrel with Norm MacDonald? I prefer Hammond... and his song "big ole cookie."


Scratch my head, so KFC has replaced Darrel with Norm MacDonald? I prefer Hammond... and his song "taters and big ole cookie."

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Speaking of which, why doesn't anybody make Grand-nephew cards?

 

My great-aunt used to buy regular niece or nephew cards and write in "great," since she couldn't ever find ones that fit. When I first learned to ready, I thought she was complimenting us until it dawned on me that it was a description of our relationship, not a superlative. (She was a great/terrific great-aunt, though, and I still miss her like crazy although it's been nine years since she passed away. I sort of love that my children got to meet a couple of their great-great aunts).

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I've seen that ad a few times and it included the song, although I have no idea why werewolves would drink vodka. I figured they'd prefer something more working class.

 

In the song, he drinks pina coladas at Trader Vic's.

My great-aunt used to buy regular niece or nephew cards and write in "great," since she couldn't ever find ones that fit. When I first learned to ready, I thought she was complimenting us until it dawned on me that it was a description of our relationship, not a superlative. (She was a great/terrific great-aunt, though, and I still miss her like crazy although it's been nine years since she passed away. I sort of love that my children got to meet a couple of their great-great aunts).

 

Yeah, I do that, too.  :)

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I thought the Three Olives guy was supposed to be a vampire. Don't judge me.

I also thought he was a vampire. I only saw the teeth. Then I heard the song. ::shrug::

 

Man, I hate that commercial.  I start flailing around for the remote as soon as it starts.  It seems like every Samsung phone commercial is pissing me off lately.

 

Okay, I know I'm both old and paranoid, but the phone's built-in live broadcasting capability sounds like a bad idea.  It lets the user stream live to YouTube.  Other phones have similar capabilities for apps like Periscope.  Butt dialing is bad enough.  So is freely running your mouth after you mistakenly believe you've hung up on the other person.  Accidentally streaming your life onto the internet... not appealing to me.   But, I'm not into social media at all.

 

In case you haven't already seen the commercial:

I HATE this commercial, namely because I've seen it forty-leven times this weekend. Here's what makes zero sense to me: Why does she have TWO phones set up and in her home that she's trying out? Is that how it works for D-list celebrities? They just get all the phones they want to try out until they decide which one they want? And why do I think her dog's a boy and she's just being stupid (but trying to be cute...it's not working) about censoring his doggie nips?

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So those Samsung washer ads with Dax and Kristen - they have a built in sink in the washing machine? I thought the purpose of washing machines was so that we didn't have to hand wash our clothes. What's next, a built in rock to bash the clothes against?

Personally, I'm going to wait for next year's models, so I can get the washer with a built in washboard and the dryer with the built in wringer and clothesline.
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Personally, I'm going to wait for next year's models, so I can get the washer with a built in washboard and the dryer with the built in wringer and clothesline.

A wringer would have to be part of the washer because its the one with a drain hose.

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Damn. Tough crowd in here. Epipenbox lady can't help her thin, limp hair.

I don't understand why anyone needs an epipen that talks to them. Is anyone really calm enough when they are going into anaphylactic shock to listen to the instructions? And I have never needed an epinephrine injection, but is "Stab me in the leg and push the syringe plunger!" really that hard? Disclaimer: I've only ever seen this on television and in movies.

Edited by bilgistic
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I've never been in anaphylaxis either, but my Mom used to have migraines and several times screwed up injecting herself with the Imitrex and ended up spraying it all over herself instead of injecting herself. But I don't think a talking injector would have helped here, either - lack of coordination due to extreme pain might just get worse with the damned thing trying to talk to you. 

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I don't get that commercial with the red car where the woman recites how many people there are in the city and only one her; she'll take those odds.  Take the odds?  What odds?  Take 'em for what?  What does "I'll take those odds" even mean?  You're one person amongst over 300,000. Are you wagering with/against them?  If you can't make sense, shut up.  "I'll take those odds" does not make me want to buy your ostentatiously red car.

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Damn. Tough crowd in here. Epipenbox lady can't help her thin, limp hair.

I don't understand why anyone needs an epipen that talks to them. Is anyone really calm enough when they are going into anaphylactic shock to listen to the instructions? And I have never needed an epinephrine injection, but is "Stab me in the leg and push the syringe plunger!" really that hard? Disclaimer: I've only ever seen this on television and in movies.

The person having the reaction may be having trouble breathing/be unable to speak to tell someone how to help them, & they may be unable to inject themselves depending on the severity of the reaction. And there may not be anyone around who's familiar with A) Giving injections, generally or B) Giving epinephrine injections, specifically... Which can only be given in certain areas of the body.

I think the talking epi-pen is the same principle as the talking cardiac defibrillators.

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Plus, by the end of this year a Game of Thrones themed version will be published and I am all about that. Better stock up on red pencils!

Not to mention the white pencils that will be used for copious snowfalls because WINTER IS COMING!

 

I've noticed that the old charity commercials with Sally Struthers, Mike Farrell, et all used to break down the cost of a monthly membership down to the price of a cup of coffee per day.  With the outrageous prices at Starbucks, this comparison would drive

many potential donors away.  Who would want to pay for a charity monthly membership based on daily Starbucks Espresso prices?

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Not to mention the white pencils that will be used for copious snowfalls because WINTER IS COMING!

 

I've noticed that the old charity commercials with Sally Struthers, Mike Farrell, et all used to break down the cost of a monthly membership down to the price of a cup of coffee per day.  With the outrageous prices at Starbucks, this comparison would drive

many potential donors away.  Who would want to pay for a charity monthly membership based on daily Starbucks Espresso prices?

The SNL spoof of those ads I posted earlier points that out - "63 cents? Where the hell are you getting your coffee?"

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The SNL spoof of those ads I posted earlier points that out - "63 cents? Where the hell are you getting your coffee?"

Gas station mini-mart, but you have to pour it yourself, and need a loyalty card not to pay the full price of 99 cents. BK used to have a senior citizen price of 50 cents but that seems to have been discontinued.

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How much electronic crap was integrated into this thing to make it look more high-tech than it actually is?  Do the animated display and blinking lights hypnotize your medical problems away?


FYI: The Willow Curve costs $599.  But hey, you can cancel the surgeries you need.  We'll be back with the cyborg apocalypse in two and two.
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The next logical leap is that he divorces his wife and abandons the kids. They had to know that, right?

 

I remember discussing that commercial somewhere around these parts when it came out.  Like you said, they have to know what it's really saying.  Because there is no way this passed through the number of hands a national spot will go through without a single person pointing out the message was the exact opposite of what they were trying to portray. 

 

They show him saying, "I'm never [doing something]" and immediately follow that by showing him doing that thing he said he'd never do.  This happens with five different scenarios.  It will then readily follow that, like the five before it, the sixth and final "I'm never" declaration will turn out to be something he does, in fact, do. 

Edited by Bastet
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No matter how many times I watch this, I still have no idea what these people say at the beginning.

"What up, peeps - it's Game and Babe"? 

"It's Gay and Bame"?

"It's Gabe and Bay"?

I'm unable to hate on that commercial because the husband/dad is so damn cute.

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I'm unable to hate on that commercial because the husband/dad is so damn cute.

You are so right, erikdepressant.  Even I don't hate the commercial - that family is adorable!  In fact, let's just decide that the guy's name is Babe. That fits. 

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No matter how many times I watch this, I still have no idea what these people say at the beginning.

"What up, peeps - it's Game and Babe"?

"It's Gay and Bame"?

"It's Gabe and Bay"?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1FLfA01eAA

It's because Walmart hired these vloggers for their ad and the name of the channel is Gabe and Babe Tv.

https://www.youtube.com/user/gflowers02?app=desktop

The Husband is adorable I will agree.

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How much electronic crap was integrated into this thing to make it look more high-tech than it actually is?  Do the animated display and blinking lights hypnotize your medical problems away?

FYI: The Willow Curve costs $599.  But hey, you can cancel the surgeries you need.  We'll be back with the cyborg apocalypse in two and two.

This reminds me of the bridge on Star Trek (The Original Series).  Look at the meaningless flashing lights.  Ooh, shiny things! 

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The next logical leap is that he divorces his wife and abandons the kids. They had to know that, right?

 

He gets himself a new sporty Mazda Miata so he can get back to being him (or whatever the yut says).

 

I'm unable to hate on that commercial because the husband/dad is so damn cute.

You, and the posters who agreed with you, made me look.  He's a cutie pie.  They all are.

 

Just saw an ad for Intercept Crossbow on Animal Planet this morning.  I can't find it online, but it says it is adjustable for every hunter.  Wow - I'm blissfully watching Too Cute going "awwww!" and now I am thinking about the neighborhood nutjob stalking the local pets with his crossbow.  I hope the revenue was worth it AP.

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