Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[Cobb Salad]

I live in a state that usually requires registered voters to request a mail in ballot but this year they’re skipping that and just sending out ballots to all registered voters. I got that same post card too.  I don’t know why they bothered.  

[Nordly Beaumont]

1 hour ago, Gramto6 said:

OK, I have had this pet peeve since I move to MT  from CA 16 years ago. I am constantly bombarded with ads for restaurants 200-400++ miles away. Popeye's. Sonic, Olive Garden. Red Lobster, etc. etc . I understand it is cheaper for them to advertise nationwide vs areas where they actually have a physical presence, but I wonder if any of them think that through. Even if I was visiting an area where there was one of  those restaurants, I would boycott them just because of the torture they put me through watching something I could never eat in my area.

I grew up in a small MT town, so I know exactly what you mean!

My mail peeve lately is all the mail I get offering to buy my house. I especially hate the ones that look like personal letters. "My client, Jeff, thinks your house is just the right size and would love your garden!" Creepy!

[Bastet]

3 hours ago, Katy M said:

I don't know about BSC.

I'm sure it says something about me that BSC is the one initialism of the three asked about that I unequivocally knew, while the other two I'd only figured out within context (MOH = Maid of Honor) or had no fucking clue and would have sat here and rotted if I'd tried to decipher it before someone explained (AITA = Am I the Asshole).

3 hours ago, Gramto6 said:

I am constantly bombarded with ads for restaurants 200-400++ miles away. Popeye's. Sonic, Olive Garden. Red Lobster, etc. etc . I understand it is cheaper for them to advertise nationwide vs areas where they actually have a physical presence, but I wonder if any of them think that through. Even if I was visiting an area where there was one of  those restaurants, I would boycott them just because of the torture they put me through watching something I could never eat in my area.

Unless you have really shitty eating options in your neck of the woods, you are not missing anything by not having local franchises of these crappy chains you're seeing advertised on your local TV channels.  They range from "meh" to "crime against food".

And, yeah, a national ad buy often makes more financial sense for the company even though the commercial goes out to those who can't actually become customers even if they realistically want to and thus irks some of them, and that's not likely to change any time soon.  So rock on with your principled travel ban, but rest assured you are not actually missing great food.

[Browncoat]

BSC to me means Biological Safety Cabinet.  

Some organization randomly sent everyone (I think) in my state a partially filled in application* for an absentee/mail-in ballot.  I, along with LOTS of other people thought it was a scam, but apparently it's a legit document.  Here, you have to apply for a ballot, that then is sent later and can either be mailed back in or dropped off in person.  You can also vote early in person before Oct. 31, or vote on election day in person.

*It has almost all the necessary information!  It's only missing SSN and a couple of other identifiers.

Peeve of the day -- that itchy place right in the middle of my back that no matter how hard I try, I just can't quite reach.

[BookWoman56]

7 hours ago, Brookside said:

What are MOH, AITA and BSC?

 

Sorry for the confusion; I'm usually about 5 years late knowing what acronyms mean and stupidly assumed these would all be commonly used and understood, since I had encountered them quite a bit over the last couple of years. To recap,

• MOH = maid/matron of honor in a wedding. 
• AITA = Am I the asshole? (I don't use reddit but apparently there are discussions there in which people describe a situation and ask the community to chime in on whether the original poster was an asshole for doing something; then there are people who take screencaps of those posts and turn them into YouTube videos. A lot of these focus on wedding issues, and I've been watching some of these videos just for the train wreck value.)
• BSC = bat shit crazy.

[Brookside]

14 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

Peeve of the day -- that itchy place right in the middle of my back that no matter how hard I try, I just can't quite reach.

You need a back scratcher my friend.  (Inanimate ones are more reliable than semi-comatose housemates.)

 

[Cobb Salad]

5 hours ago, Nordly Beaumont said:

My mail peeve lately is all the mail I get offering to buy my house. I especially hate the ones that look like personal letters. "My client, Jeff, thinks your house is just the right size and would love your garden!" Creepy!

Mine was from someone who said he and his wife like HGTV so they’d be ok with a house that needed fixing up.  I agree, the wording is creepy and annoying - the card went right in to the trash.  

[shapeshifter]

57 minutes ago, Cobb Salad said:

Mine was from someone who said he and his wife like HGTV so they’d be ok with a house that needed fixing up.  I agree, the wording is creepy and annoying - the card went right in to the trash.  

Wow. That wording is also offensive and manipulative, as if to say: Your home is not suitable for humans, so you might as well sell it, since you obviously don’t have what it takes. 
Into the trash is definitely where it belongs. 

[shapeshifter]

Yesterday on my birthday I got about a dozen Social Security scam calls on my cell phone. 
I was beyond peeved about it. 🤬
I am assuming I was targeted on that day because of the presumption that I would answer an unknown number anticipating a lovely birthday well-wishing from a distant family member —which is cruel enough. 
But I have one daughter in a “Get ready to leave” fire zone in Oregon, so I will be answering or at least anxiously checking to see if a voicemail is left from any number. She has “cell phone and batteries” on her escape list, but phones can turn into bricks, especially if exposed to heat. 🙁
And yesterday the furnace technician was coming to turn on my heat for the winter (the high temperatures have been around 62° for the past week) so I had to be ready to answer when he called from his unknown-to-me cell phone. 

ETA: I am enjoying having a warm apartment, and so far my daughter still has an apartment. 

Edited September 12, 2020 by shapeshifter

[MargeGunderson]

1 hour ago, Brookside said:

You need a back scratcher my friend.  (Inanimate ones are more reliable than semi-comatose housemates.)

 

Also useful for getting cat toys out from under furniture in the middle of the night. During the day too, I assume, but my cats prefer nocturnal  battles and know that if they cry loud enough I will fish out their toy. So they can do it again. They are clearly winning the war against me. 

[annzeepark914]

Happy Birthday, shapeshifter!! I hope you celebrated in style 🍷🌷🦋💐🎂

[Cobb Salad]

3 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

Wow. That wording is also offensive and manipulative, as if to say: Your home is not suitable for humans, so you might as well sell it, since you obviously don’t have what it takes. 
Into the trash is definitely where it belongs. 

Exactly- I’m sure they’re looking to make a lowball offer to buy someone else’s “piece of junk”.  Then resell it to make a mint. 
Anyway, I’d wager anyone prepping their home for sale will make it nice looking to present (fresh coat of paint, newer appliances, etc.) but the majority of buyers end up making changes to suit their tastes so the poorly worded message I got was probably trying to say that.  For myself when I bought my place I generally liked what the seller did (the reason I bought it vs the other places I saw which were bland looking) but the only thing I did was repaint the bedroom to a color I liked.  Easy stuff.  

[peacheslatour]

14 hours ago, Nordly Beaumont said:

I grew up in a small MT town, so I know exactly what you mean!

My mail peeve lately is all the mail I get offering to buy my house. I especially hate the ones that look like personal letters. "My client, Jeff, thinks your house is just the right size and would love your garden!" Creepy!

We get those all the time. We live near downtown in an affluent, lake front town. The letters usually read something like the "Dear Neighbor, my wife (a Sunday school teacher!) and I just moved to your community and we just fell in love with your charming  little house (crappy shack) and would love to make you an offer. We are expecting our first child soon and we think our family would be very happy if you will let us. Please contact Jim Miller at Remax.com."

[Brookside]

11 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

Also useful for getting cat toys out from under furniture in the middle of the night. During the day too, I assume, but my cats prefer nocturnal  battles and know that if they cry loud enough I will fish out their toy. So they can do it again. They are clearly winning the war against me. 

I find kitchen tongs are also multi-disciplinary utensils.

Edited September 12, 2020 by Brookside

[ginger90]

This covers my peeve:

[Cobb Salad]

Yeah, the development I live in and the one down the street set up these bag dispensers for people to pick up their dog droppings about a year or two ago.  Someone the next street over from me would let their dog do their business in this same general area then never pick it up.  There was so much of it that it was looking bad plus it was in the winter when it would snow a few inches partially covering it so anyone walking in the area (maybe in the dark) may have a hard time seeing it before it was too late.  

[Calvada]

Getting back to groom's cake at a wedding - that's the norm at most weddings I've been to in Wisconsin.  When one of my sisters got married in the mid-80's, she wanted her wedding cake to be a flavored cake that was her favorite (won't say what it was because inevitably numerous posts will follow about how much that flavor is hated!) and her MIL to be threw a conniption, saying it was just NOT DONE to have a flavored cake, that a wedding cake MUST be a white cake with white icing.  To appease the MIL, they got the white wedding cake, but also a groom's cake that was my sister's favorite flavor.  It will not be a surprise to anyone that the groom's cake was gone in a flash and there was most of the blah white cake remaining.  

Pet peeve this time of year: people who do not turn on their headlights at dawn or dusk.  Hey morons, you may be able to see me but I cannot see you. 

[peacheslatour]

18 minutes ago, Calvada said:

Getting back to groom's cake at a wedding - that's the norm at most weddings I've been to in Wisconsin.  When one of my sisters got married in the mid-80's, she wanted her wedding cake to be a flavored cake that was her favorite (won't say what it was because inevitably numerous posts will follow about how much that flavor is hated!) and her MIL to be threw a conniption, saying it was just NOT DONE to have a flavored cake, that a wedding cake MUST be a white cake with white icing.  To appease the MIL, they got the white wedding cake, but also a groom's cake that was my sister's favorite flavor.  It will not be a surprise to anyone that the groom's cake was gone in a flash and there was most of the blah white cake remaining.  

Pet peeve this time of year: people who do not turn on their headlights at dawn or dusk.  Hey morons, you may be able to see me but I cannot see you. 

Nyquil flavored?

[PRgal]

4 hours ago, ginger90 said:

This covers my peeve:

We need these signs in public bathrooms.  Most people flush, but SOME DO NOT.  I don't want to scream "hey LADY (but these days, with unisex bathrooms, it could be a guy), what's this mess you have here?" if I see TP floating (or worse.....STUFF) when I enter a stall.  Oh, and not to mention, dirty toilet seats.  

[CrazyInAlabama]

19 hours ago, Brookside said:

I find kitchen tongs are also multi-disciplinary utensils

I've found the long brushes made for cleaning under the fridge are very useful for getting stuff back from under the sofa, or stove.   

[peacheslatour]

35 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

I've found the long brushes made for cleaning under the fridge are very useful for getting stuff back from under the sofa, or stove.   

I just use the long bamboo stakes I use for holding up my plants.

[Bastet]

1 hour ago, Calvada said:

her MIL to be threw a conniption, saying it was just NOT DONE to have a flavored cake, that a wedding cake MUST be a white cake with white icing. 

I tend to avoid weddings, but obligations to family and friends being what they are I've still attending my share, and I think white cake with white icing (no filling, even?!) has been the minority.  The frosting is virtually always white, yes (buttercream).  But the cake and filling are usually flavored (and, like I said above, since most wedding cakes have at least two tiers, there are at least two options for guests; no need for a separate cake attributed to the groom). 

A common combination is a chocolate cake with raspberry filling and either a lemon cake with lemon filling or a vanilla cake some sort of fruit filling (often strawberry or lemon, but mango and passion fruit make appearances in season).  Marble cake appears fairly frequently, usually with chocolate filling but sometimes a fruit.  Some have the small top tier (especially if it's a three-tier cake for a big reception) in a cake flavor that has less mass appeal, like red velvet, carrot, tiramisu, or German chocolate.

 

[PRgal]

A couple of years ago, I went to a wedding where the couple served their wedding cake in one cup sizes mason jars.  I guess it’s to avoid cake cutting pictures?

[SuprSuprElevated]

Thankfully, the food in mason jars fad had it's moment, and is mercifully dead.  At least from what I can see.

Damn you Pinterest.

[Quof]

44 minutes ago, Bastet said:

A common combination is a chocolate cake with raspberry filling and either a lemon cake with lemon filling or a vanilla cake some sort of fruit filling (often strawberry or lemon, but mango and passion fruit make appearances in season).  Marble cake appears fairly frequently, usually with chocolate filling but sometimes a fruit.  Some have the small top tier (especially if it's a three-tier cake for a big reception) in a cake flavor that has less mass appeal, like red velvet, carrot, tiramisu, or German chocolate.

Dammit, now I want cake.  

Of all of the weddings I have attended, I only remember the cake from one, my best friend's, and that was chocolate with white icing.  The reason I remember it is that I held it on my lap while she slowly drove from the bakery to the reception hall the night before the wedding.  I don't remember why I was assigned that task (on top of all the the chores I was assigned for this wedding - don't get me started on why your Maid of Honour shouldn't be treated as an actual MAID.)  I don't even remember if it tasted good.   

[magicdog]

On 9/11/2020 at 2:44 PM, PRgal said:

 It was about losing weight because she’s a size activist.  She shouldn’t shame people who want to lose weight.  She always seems to imply that people should be happy the way they are.  I mean, I’m skinny, but want to look more toned (and without all those gross, super-sweet protein powders).  Am I not allowed to?  

That leads to my pet peeve of people not being taught about nutrition.  I blame the media and "experts" who were bought and paid for by vested interests.  There would be different "diets" and outdated information that even now is still being taught!  It took me a lifetime to finally learn it's not just "calories in - calories out",  "the 4 food groups" or "avoid fast food".  Many of us might think we're eating right and we're still eating nutrient devoid food!

Personally, @PRgal there is nothing wrong with losing weight or getting toned.  I risk pissing off body positives like the woman you described, but average human beings are not meant to weigh 300-400+ pounds!  It's one thing to be comfortable in your own skin, but there are limits.  If anything building muscle tone and core strength is the best thing you could do for your body - I took up pilates to build muscle and improve core strength and flexibility.  That's something we all need no matter your body type or weight. 

[peacheslatour]

22 minutes ago, magicdog said:

That leads to my pet peeve of people not being taught about nutrition.  I blame the media and "experts" who were bought and paid for by vested interests.  There would be different "diets" and outdated information that even now is still being taught!  It took me a lifetime to finally learn it's not just "calories in - calories out",  "the 4 food groups" or "avoid fast food".  Many of us might think we're eating right and we're still eating nutrient devoid food!

Personally, @PRgal there is nothing wrong with losing weight or getting toned.  I risk pissing off body positives like the woman you described, but average human beings are not meant to weigh 300-400+ pounds!  It's one thing to be comfortable in your own skin, but there are limits.  If anything building muscle tone and core strength is the best thing you could do for your body - I took up pilates to build muscle and improve core strength and flexibility.  That's something we all need no matter your body type or weight. 

This. I look at people like my neighbor, who huffs and puffs just getting her mail. She must weigh at least three hundred pounds. She is about my height, therefor her skeleton is the same size as mine and I can't imagine piling that much weight on such a little pile of bones.

[Sun-Bun]

6 hours ago, PRgal said:

A couple of years ago, I went to a wedding where the couple served their wedding cake in one cup sizes mason jars.  I guess it’s to avoid cake cutting pictures?

Lemme guess...was their wedding in a barn too? Because I’m about as over these Southern barn/“country charm” themed weddings as I am the mason jars trend in general. Speaking of barn weddings, the last one I attended a year or more ago served a variety of different cake pops instead of an actual cake, which I thought was kinda brilliant. 
 

Speaking of weddings, I still love my own, the ceremony of which was combined as part of our honeymoon...just my groom and I on a beach in St. Thomas, me in a cute little $150 Betsey Johnson white cocktail dress I found on eBay, barefoot with flowers in my hair and my groom in a consignment store linen suit...doing the wedding walk to a steel drum player under a palm tree altar leftover from a previous wedding...rum punch and wine/beer with cheese and snacks in a hut...dinner with a handful of family/friends at the hotel nearby...the irony is that I loathe the wasteful extravagance of weddings and would’ve been quite content to have simply eloped in a Vegas wedding chapel, but my husband was the groomzilla who desperately wanted a proper wedding ceremony with select friends/family! So that was my compromise...(it should be noted that no family/friends from my side bothered to show up because I downplayed it so much) We weren’t even registered anywhere and just asked for Paypal donations to our new living room sofa fund. 

Altogether we maybe paid $3000 for everything? That was fine by me...

And I love attending most weddings/receptions, but I secretly hate the idea of them in general. Talk about thousands of dollars wasted just for one bigassed party. Although if you’re not serving any booze to your guests, I’m totally gonna judge you for it and likely leave early too, sorry...if I spent $50-$200 on a gift for the couple and a night of their shitty reception music, they need to at least properly wine and dine their guests for the night!

Edited September 14, 2020 by Sun-Bun

[PRgal]

7 minutes ago, Sun-Bun said:

Lemme guess...was their wedding in a barn too? Because I’m about as over these Southern barn/“country charm” themed weddings as I am the mason jars trend in general. Speaking of barn weddings, the last one I attended a year or more ago served a variety of different cake pops instead of an actual cake, which I thought was kinda brilliant. 
 

Speaking of weddings, I still loved my own, the ceremony of which was combined as part of our honeymoon...just my groom and I on a beach in St. Thomas, me in a cute little $150 Betsey Johnson white cocktail dress I found on eBay while barefoot with flowers in my hair, my groom in a consignment store linen suit...doing the wedding walk to a steel drum player under a palm tree altar leftover from a previous wedding...rum punch and wine with cheese and snacks in a hut...dinner with a handful of family/friends at the hotel nearby...the irony is that I loathe the wasteful extravagance of weddings and would’ve been quite content to have simply eloped in a Vegas wedding chapel, but my husband was the groomzilla who desperately wanted a wedding ceremony with select friends/family! So that was my compromise...(it should be noted that no family/friends from my side bothered to show up because I downplayed it so much)

Altogether we maybe paid $3000 for everything? That was fine by me...and I love attending most weddings/receptions, but I secretly hate the idea of them in general. Although if you’re not serving any booze to your guests, I’m totally gonna judge you for it and likely leave early too, sorry...if I spent $50-$200 on a gift for you and a night of your shitty reception music, you can at least wine and dine my ass for the night!

Nope.  In a library (which also has wedding/reception venue spaces)!  The barn wedding couple had a more "traditional" cake as did the farmer's market couple.  Everything else about their reception was "traditional."  At least we didn't have to overload on dessert.  A mason jar cake meant we could take it home and have it another day.  Wedding cakes as a guest favour! 

[Calvada]

2 hours ago, Bastet said:

I tend to avoid weddings, but obligations to family and friends being what they are I've still attending my share, and I think white cake with white icing (no filling, even?!) has been the minority.  The frosting is virtually always white, yes (buttercream).  But the cake and filling are usually flavored (and, like I said above, since most wedding cakes have at least two tiers, there are at least two options for guests; no need for a separate cake attributed to the groom). 

A common combination is a chocolate cake with raspberry filling and either a lemon cake with lemon filling or a vanilla cake some sort of fruit filling (often strawberry or lemon, but mango and passion fruit make appearances in season).  Marble cake appears fairly frequently, usually with chocolate filling but sometimes a fruit.  Some have the small top tier (especially if it's a three-tier cake for a big reception) in a cake flavor that has less mass appeal, like red velvet, carrot, tiramisu, or German chocolate.

 

My sister's wedding was 35 years ago, when more adventurous types of cake was just becoming a thing.  I haven't been to a wedding in the past 2+ decades that didn't have cake with something like lemon or raspberry or chocolate mousse filling - usually more than 1 option within a 2 or 3-tiered cake.  But here in Wisconsin, often there is still a groom's cake.  At my nephew's wedding, there was a platter of chocolate cupcakes with peanut butter frosting, each garnished with a mini Reese's peanut butter cup, as an acknowledgement of his love of Reese's peanut butter cups.  They didn't want to have that as a tier in the cake in case of allergies.  

Speaking of taking cake home makes me remember a wedding many years ago, when after the ceremonial cutting of the cake by the couple, the catering staff cut the rest of the cake, put pieces into little white boxes printed with the names of of the bride & groom, and then distributed the boxes to the tables.  A little boy, probably about age 5, was at the table next to me.  He asked what it was, his mother said it was his piece of cake, he asked why it was in a box, and she said it was so he could take it home.  Total and immediate meltdown!  "NOOOO, I WANT TO EAT MY CAKE NOOOOOOWWWWWW!"  

[Mabinogia]

1 hour ago, magicdog said:

It took me a lifetime to finally learn it's not just "calories in - calories out",  "the 4 food groups" or "avoid fast food".  Many of us might think we're eating right and we're still eating nutrient devoid food!

This! My pet peeve is that all "diets" seem to be about weight loss. I am underweight. I don't need to lose weight. I need to eat healthy. Despite being underweight I have a gut because my two favorite food groups are apparently added sugar and saturated fat! It's just so hard to find information about eating better that isn't about losing weight. 

 

 

[CrazyInAlabama]

15 hours ago, Calvada said:

At my nephew's wedding, there was a platter of chocolate cupcakes with peanut butter frosting, each garnished with a mini Reese's peanut butter cup, as an acknowledgement of his love of Reese's peanut butter cups.  They didn't want to have that as a tier in the cake in case of allergies. 

That's so considerate of the couple to be careful about possible allergies. 

I live in the deep South (about 6" of water deep according to the latest rainfall forecast thanks to Hurricane Sally), and here people either go to specialty bakeries and get hideously overpriced cakes with all kinds of different flavors, and smaller cakes with little bridges, and other interesting possibilities.    Many I know have used the bakery at our regional grocery store, Publix.    They do a great job, have a lot of flavors of cake, icings, and fillings, but the best of all is their Buttercream icing is really butter, not whipped shortning the way other stores are.    

However, if you get an expensive cake, pay the bakery to do delivery and set up, otherwise the cake is your problem from the second you pick it up at the bakery.   So if you get the wrong pillars, or something happens to the cake before the reception, you will have to replace it yourself.    

On the Peoples Court a woman who bought cheesy little stands for her cake was suing the cake baker because the cake didn't stay together, and the plaintiff won what she paid for the cake.     However, the cake stands the woman bought looked like dollar store junk that wasn't going to hold a Twinkie up, so in the cake bakers place, I would have refused to use the cake stands, and then the woman would have sued her for that.  

Edited September 14, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[Bastet]

3 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

However, if you get an expensive cake, pay the bakery to do delivery and set up, otherwise the cake is your problem from the second you pick it up at the bakery.   So if you get the wrong pillars, or something happens to the cake before the reception, you will have to replace it yourself.    

Yeah, for my parents' 50th anniversary cake, they paid the delivery fee, thinking of it as insurance.  You just don't want to have to fuss with picking something up the day of your event to begin with, but certainly not something that can be destroyed if you have to slam on the brakes.  If the bakery has control of it, they are responsible for replacing it if anything happens.  (Plus, it needed to be there early, when the florist was there, so he could add flowers to the cake.)

[Trini]

3 hours ago, Quof said:

- don't get me started on why your Maid of Honour shouldn't be treated as an actual MAID.)

LOL! I was the Slave of Honor when my sister got married. Whatever, she's his problem now! 😜

[Sun-Bun]

5 minutes ago, Trini said:

LOL! I was the Slave of Honor when my sister got married. Whatever, she's his problem now! 😜

@Trini, I’m so sorry...that’s such a HUGE and thankless job. Slave of Honor is right!!!
 

Back in my early 20’s I actually lost a so-called friend over it because I had no idea how much she actually expected of me when she “awarded” me with the MoH position...she wanted me to spend nearly $200 of MY OWN hard-earned money on a dress and I refused. Then she wanted me to somehow throw her a proper bachelorette party, so I asked her sister to take that task on because I had neither the time nor money to do any of that properly. She then asked me why I agreed to the “job” if I had no intentions of “fulfilling my duties”, to which I told her I never would’ve agreed to the task if I’d known beforehand that I was going to be her designated bridezilla bitch. Her eventual trashy backyard wedding was very lame and sadly dry(never mind the ultra fancyassed bottle of champs I brought as part of my gift for her that she polished off all by herself), she quickly got pregnant, then divorced several years later and I never heard from her again.
 

Lesson learned: I’ve refused *every* wedding party invite since then. Although I did read a hymn a few years ago at a friend’s wedding and she was cool enough to give me one of the bridesmaid swag bags, so win-win there!

[Mindthinkr]

I was married in the early 70’s. My Mother and Aunt took all of the planning out of my hands. (not my choice) 

I did remain firm on one thing. Chocolate wedding cake. 

[Calvada]

1 hour ago, Bastet said:

Yeah, for my parents' 50th anniversary cake, they paid the delivery fee, thinking of it as insurance.  You just don't want to have to fuss with picking something up the day of your event to begin with, but certainly not something that can be destroyed if you have to slam on the brakes.  If the bakery has control of it, they are responsible for replacing it if anything happens.  (Plus, it needed to be there early, when the florist was there, so he could add flowers to the cake.)

Yes, if I ever had a large and expensive cake in my car, I know that would be the day someone would do something stupid causing me to slam on the brakes.  I get nervous enough transporting a pie and a large salad bowl to my sister's house on the holidays.  

[isalicat]

What a great thread! I love reading about everyone's wedding experiences! After a dear friend wound up living on Valium for several months due to her completely over the top traditional wedding (engineered by her socially ambitious parents) I knew I wasn't going that route.

My engagement party having been derailed due to an unnecessary quarrel between my parents and my fiance's parents over the guest list, my fiance and I decided to take over the wedding entirely with the idea that we would have a very, very inexpensive ceremony and celebration and the funds saved by my parents and his could go towards our three month honeymoon tour of Europe (not like a Grand Tour - more like the $5 dollar a day version albeit with nice Eurail passes on the continent). This trip was combined with my spending a month in London at the British Library doing research for my master's so the blatant fundraising was a tad less tacky for being "educationally" justified.

So the pet peeve part here is that we did have a lovely wedding cake - two tiers and yes, being hippies, it was a carrot cake with real cream cheese frosting (still my favorite cake - and no nasty pineapple bits, thank you very much). The restaurant where we had our family wedding dinner (there was a wild party with all our friends, which we joined later) carefully packaged up the top layer of the cake for us (we were under the impression you save this for your first wedding anniversary celebration) and my aunt, previously not a candidate for such a major crime, made off with it at the end of the evening and I never saw it again. Do not covet thy neighbor's wedding carrot cake people! This same aunt neglected to contribute to the only thing we wanted (money for the trip - yes, we were real clear when people asked since we were not registered anywhere (do people still do that?) and gave us a silver plated platter of complete uselessness.

[Sun-Bun]

19 minutes ago, isalicat said:

my aunt, previously not a candidate for such a major crime, made off with it at the end of the evening and I never saw it again. Do not covet thy neighbor's wedding carrot cake people! This same aunt neglected to contribute to the only thing we wanted (money for the trip

Oh man, that’s so awful!!! Sorry, but your aunt sounds trashy AF; like on what planet is it considered remotely acceptable to take a couple’s leftover wedding cake?! I’d be roasting her ass at every single family gathering after that over such a tacky move. Not cool at all, Auntie McGreedy!!

[Bastet]

1 hour ago, isalicat said:

carefully packaged up the top layer of the cake for us (we were under the impression you save this for your first wedding anniversary celebration)

What amuses me is the only context - until now - in which I've ever heard of that tradition is from people saying, "yeah, we'd heard you were supposed to save the top tier for your first anniversary, so we didn't serve it, but we polished off that whole thing before the honeymoon" (or, once, that the bride, groom, and their wedding party devoured it as a 2:00 a.m. snack after the reception).  So I've never heard from anyone who's actually done it.

I'm not one for superstitions, and I certainly wouldn't let cake sit in the freezer for a year (I wouldn't want to eat cake that had been in the freezer for a year; I won't even eat bread that's been in the freezer), so I wouldn't even make the attempt at saving it.  Hell, I'd start in on it for breakfast the next morning.

[SuprSuprElevated]

8 hours ago, Bastet said:

What amuses me is the only context - until now - in which I've ever heard of that tradition is from people saying, "yeah, we'd heard you were supposed to save the top tier for your first anniversary, so we didn't serve it, but we polished off that whole thing before the honeymoon" (or, once, that the bride, groom, and their wedding party devoured it as a 2:00 a.m. snack after the reception).  So I've never heard from anyone who's actually done it.

I'm not one for superstitions, and I certainly wouldn't let cake sit in the freezer for a year (I wouldn't want to eat cake that had been in the freezer for a year; I won't even eat bread that's been in the freezer), so I wouldn't even make the attempt at saving it.  Hell, I'd start in on it for breakfast the next morning.

We actually did save ours, froze it (properly), and it was delicious!

[PRgal]

14 hours ago, Mabinogia said:

This! My pet peeve is that all "diets" seem to be about weight loss. I am underweight. I don't need to lose weight. I need to eat healthy. Despite being underweight I have a gut because my two favorite food groups are apparently added sugar and saturated fat! It's just so hard to find information about eating better that isn't about losing weight. 

 

 

I don't think the Mediterranean Diet is supposed to be about weight loss.  I mostly eat that way (or at least try to), with a bit of Okinawa (though it usually ends up looking more like a mainland Japanese diet (with less rice), since a true Okinawa diet focuses A LOT on sweet potatoes - more than I would normally eat) thrown in.  

 

16 hours ago, magicdog said:

That leads to my pet peeve of people not being taught about nutrition.  I blame the media and "experts" who were bought and paid for by vested interests.  There would be different "diets" and outdated information that even now is still being taught!  It took me a lifetime to finally learn it's not just "calories in - calories out",  "the 4 food groups" or "avoid fast food".  Many of us might think we're eating right and we're still eating nutrient devoid food!

Personally, @PRgal there is nothing wrong with losing weight or getting toned.  I risk pissing off body positives like the woman you described, but average human beings are not meant to weigh 300-400+ pounds!  It's one thing to be comfortable in your own skin, but there are limits.  If anything building muscle tone and core strength is the best thing you could do for your body - I took up pilates to build muscle and improve core strength and flexibility.  That's something we all need no matter your body type or weight. 

Unfortunately, that's not what some body image/size diversity activists seem to imply.  I think it's great that size 22 (for example) is available, but when activists seem to want women to believe that it's perfectly fine to BE a size 22 and STAY THERE (while at the same time, shaming those of us who're 0s and 2s)...and yes, they seem to say that.  

[shapeshifter]

11 hours ago, isalicat said:

What a great thread! I love reading about everyone's wedding experiences! After a dear friend wound up living on Valium for several months due to her completely over the top traditional wedding (engineered by her socially ambitious parents) I knew I wasn't going that route.

My engagement party having been derailed due to an unnecessary quarrel between my parents and my fiance's parents over the guest list, my fiance and I decided to take over the wedding entirely with the idea that we would have a very, very inexpensive ceremony and celebration and the funds saved by my parents and his could go towards our three month honeymoon tour of Europe (not like a Grand Tour - more like the $5 dollar a day version albeit with nice Eurail passes on the continent). This trip was combined with my spending a month in London at the British Library doing research for my master's so the blatant fundraising was a tad less tacky for being "educationally" justified.

So the pet peeve part here is that we did have a lovely wedding cake - two tiers and yes, being hippies, it was a carrot cake with real cream cheese frosting (still my favorite cake - and no nasty pineapple bits, thank you very much). The restaurant where we had our family wedding dinner (there was a wild party with all our friends, which we joined later) carefully packaged up the top layer of the cake for us (we were under the impression you save this for your first wedding anniversary celebration) and my aunt, previously not a candidate for such a major crime, made off with it at the end of the evening and I never saw it again. Do not covet thy neighbor's wedding carrot cake people! This same aunt neglected to contribute to the only thing we wanted (money for the trip - yes, we were real clear when people asked since we were not registered anywhere (do people still do that?) and gave us a silver plated platter of complete uselessness.

Wow. You have some terrible family members who should only exist in fictional comedies. 
But I love your wedding cake!
     "...being hippies, it was a carrot cake with real cream cheese frosting..." 
Clearly you and your marriage have thrived despite your spiteful relations. 
 

10 hours ago, Bastet said:

I certainly wouldn't let cake sit in the freezer for a year

Now that you mention it, it makes sense, but I also wonder if the high sugar content combined with the freezing temperatures mean it will not change chemically or have anything grow on or in it? 

Anyway, I seem to recall discovering a slice of wedding cake in the back of the freezer 7 years after we married when we were getting ready to move. IIRC, we did eat it.
Purely coincidentally, that move was the first in a series of incidents that led to our separation 6 months later and eventual divorce.
But an author-writer could probably do something with the symbolism of the 7-year-old piece of cake coming out of the freezer to be finally eaten right as everything devolves.   

[magicdog]

27 minutes ago, PRgal said:

I don't think the Mediterranean Diet is supposed to be about weight loss.  I mostly eat that way (or at least try to), with a bit of Okinawa (though it usually ends up looking more like a mainland Japanese diet (with less rice), since a true Okinawa diet focuses A LOT on sweet potatoes - more than I would normally eat) thrown in.  

I think it's about eating the type of diet similar to what one's ethnic heritage is.  That can work for some, but many people are of mixed heritage so they may tolerate some foods but not others.  Don't even get me started on GMOs and other edible poisons!

 

29 minutes ago, PRgal said:

I think it's great that size 22 (for example) is available, but when activists seem to want women to believe that it's perfectly fine to BE a size 22 and STAY THERE (while at the same time, shaming those of us who're 0s and 2s)..

That's a big problem (pun not intended!).  I do believe in height weight proportion which is linked to one's frame (larger frames can carry more weight and weight gain may be hidden better compared to a smaller frame), but these body positive types have no clue what they're encouraging.  Most women's dress sizes are not accurate anyway.  Manufacturers have been aiming at women's vanity for decades!  A woman who wears a size 2 now probably wore a size 10 fifty years ago!  Formal wear is closer to the old sizing standards, which is why when the bride and her bridesmaids order a size 6 gown and wonder why it doesn't fit, they go berserk thinking they gained weight!  If you look at old sewing patters for women, it's more about bust and hip measurements.

[CrazyInAlabama]

I bet the aunt has a bunch of those useless platters, she probably bought them on clearance somewhere, and always gives something similar because it's cheaper.  I know people that go to outlet malls, and usually shop the clearance section at the housewares stores for similar bargains.      

I was very glad when I moved away before my brother's wedding to Miss Tacky.     She is bottom heavy, and wore a stapless mermaid that only emphasized the bad points,  2 inch long red dagger finger nails, and her sisters all wore strapless dresses that barely stayed up.   So I would have been getting a lot of flack from my parents about not participating in the wedding.   I'm a lot more top heavy than her sisters, so a strapless would't have worked at all, and I'm sure Miss Bridezilla would have insisted it fit with her vision of her special day.     She only married into my family because my parents did everything for the sons, including a lot of financial support.    

Edited September 14, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[magicdog]

2 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

I was very glad when I moved away before my brother's wedding to Miss Tacky.     She is bottom heavy, and wore a stapless mermaid that only emphasized the bad points,  2 inch long red dagger finger nails, and her sisters all wore strapless dresses that barely stayed up.   So I wouldn't have been getting a lot of flack from my parents about not participating in the wedding.   I'm a lot more top heavy than her sisters, so a strapless would't have worked at all, and I'm sure Miss Bridezilla would have insisted it fit with her vision of her special day.  

That's a pet peeve in itself:  Bridezillas who always say, "It's MY day!".  No sweetie - it's his day too, and that of your loved ones who hope to spend this special moment with you because they hope it will be the beginning of happy times.  Miss Tacky sounds like a real piece of work!  Glad you dodged that bullet!

Wedding stories like these remind me of a saying I've heard:  "Some [women] want a wedding, but not a marriage."

[Quof]

11 hours ago, Bastet said:

I'm not one for superstitions, and I certainly wouldn't let cake sit in the freezer for a year (I wouldn't want to eat cake that had been in the freezer for a year; I won't even eat bread that's been in the freezer), so I wouldn't even make the attempt at saving it.  Hell, I'd start in on it for breakfast the next morning.

Elaine ate the cake

[PRgal]

2 hours ago, magicdog said:

I think it's about eating the type of diet similar to what one's ethnic heritage is.  That can work for some, but many people are of mixed heritage so they may tolerate some foods but not others.  Don't even get me started on GMOs and other edible poisons!

 

That's a big problem (pun not intended!).  I do believe in height weight proportion which is linked to one's frame (larger frames can carry more weight and weight gain may be hidden better compared to a smaller frame), but these body positive types have no clue what they're encouraging.  Most women's dress sizes are not accurate anyway.  Manufacturers have been aiming at women's vanity for decades!  A woman who wears a size 2 now probably wore a size 10 fifty years ago!  Formal wear is closer to the old sizing standards, which is why when the bride and her bridesmaids order a size 6 gown and wonder why it doesn't fit, they go berserk thinking they gained weight!  If you look at old sewing patters for women, it's more about bust and hip measurements.

Exactly.  I don't think there are many women who are naturally size 22.  Maybe if you're 6'5".  But it's great that women who're currently bigger to have, say, athletic wear available.  Hey, in order to take care of yourself, you're going to need, say, workout gear, right? 

[Mabinogia]

2 hours ago, magicdog said:

I think it's about eating the type of diet similar to what one's ethnic heritage is. 

hmmm, so Haggis and Swedish Meatballs? haha Or if I go with the other side of the family I could have fish and chips and beer! Woo hooooo

I get what you mean though. I come from coastal people so I tend to eat a lot of fish/seafood, which works for me. 😉 and potatoes from my Irish roots which I am also fine with.

I'm in the process of mostly cutting out processed foods. It ain't easy! But I am starting to see a change in my cravings which is awesome. I'm also drooling less at all those food porn commercials, which is another pet peeve of sorts, because there is no way that the burger I get from the McDs drivethru looks anything like the one they are showing on tv!

[PRgal]

3 hours ago, magicdog said:

I think it's about eating the type of diet similar to what one's ethnic heritage is.  That can work for some, but many people are of mixed heritage so they may tolerate some foods but not others.  Don't even get me started on GMOs and other edible poisons!

 

That's a big problem (pun not intended!).  I do believe in height weight proportion which is linked to one's frame (larger frames can carry more weight and weight gain may be hidden better compared to a smaller frame), but these body positive types have no clue what they're encouraging.  Most women's dress sizes are not accurate anyway.  Manufacturers have been aiming at women's vanity for decades!  A woman who wears a size 2 now probably wore a size 10 fifty years ago!  Formal wear is closer to the old sizing standards, which is why when the bride and her bridesmaids order a size 6 gown and wonder why it doesn't fit, they go berserk thinking they gained weight!  If you look at old sewing patters for women, it's more about bust and hip measurements.

I'm mostly southern Chinese (Guangdong region, with some northern roots) and rice is meh for me.  I don't find my region's foods as interesting as that of the Mediterranean or India.  In fact, I find plant-based meals from those areas much more palatable!  I think it's about the flavour.  And I LOVE cheese.  The staple meat in most parts of China is pork (to the point that "yuk" (meat) is always pork and other types of (mammals, anyway) will specify the species (so beef would  be gnau (cattle) yuk, for example)).