S15.E16: This Isn't Best Friends at First Sight

[Jax7917]

39 minutes ago, Crashcourse said:

I don't see Mitch putting the blame on Krysten.  I see him putting more of the blame on himself because he's aware that he's not marriage material--certainly not for her and perhaps for anyone. 

Well his friend asked him if he has fun with her and Mitch responded that he does and he loves her but he's not in love with her. I don't think he realizes that he isn't capable of being in love with anyone. He is too rigid, especially in his "save the planet" ways. Most people aren't as extreme as he is with that and I think he has a problem with anyone who isn't. 

Miguel on the other hand SAYS he loves Lindy, but does he really? He threatens to leave her constantly and says he wouldn't be able to stay with her if she does X,Y,Z ALL the time. She has an annoying voice but he comes off as a bully and has a big nasty streak. I think she deserves better.

[Lindz]

Nate really demonstrated twisting words & assigning the wrong meaning to what Stacia said. Too bad he lacks the awareness & depth to simply ASK what she means BEFORE he freaks out. She didn't explain what she meant, as usual, which caused him to go negative even though she is negative with criticism & complaints. Fail/fail. 🥴😒

[pdlinda]

On 10/19/2022 at 5:40 PM, Crashcourse said:

I will be so *bleeping* glad when this *bleeping* season is *bleeping* done.

The dynamics between these couples are so intensely draining that their relationships translate into living through an ORDEAL that one would flee at the first opportunity.

[glitterpussy]

On 10/20/2022 at 9:02 AM, Mr. Miner said:

How does this show manage to make it look like it's freezing in San Diego?

Below 70 degrees here is beanie and sweatshirt weather :)

[Lindz]

Mitch's vision of after DD life is living apart for a week?!! HUH?! AND??!! WTF?! I can't believe Krysten just accepted that. HOW could he think that was sufficient?!!! His lack of thought is very disturbing. & he's still only thinking of himself because he didn't ask her what she wanted to do or start planning it with her. 😒😒

[DrewPaul2010]

3 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

Frankly, I wouldn't expect any MAFS partner to be ready to say "I love you" after only eight weeks of living together.  I could see them really liking each other and saying yes on Decision Day so they can live away from the cameras and give themselves time to see if they grow to love each other.  That's why I get suspicious when they say "I love you" after only a few weeks, and why I don't believe Miguel means it.   

I think we all know there is a distinction between love and being 'in love' with someone. Being in love usually means you have a deep emotional attachment and bond to someone nearly bordering on infatuation. It is a real thing. Under its spell one is likely to let red flags sail right by them with out notice. They project perfection in the person they are in love with and become disillusioned if they become mere mortals. I would give falling in love second place to compatibility, trustworthiness , fun to be with. Not identical but similar goals and aspirations. Mutual respect and trust. Too bad I didn't learn that when I was courting... 

[pdlinda]

2 hours ago, Lindz said:

Mitch's vision of after DD life is living apart for a week?!! HUH?! AND??!! WTF?! I can't believe Krysten just accepted that. HOW could he think that was sufficient?!!! His lack of thought is very disturbing. & he's still only thinking of himself because he didn't ask her what she wanted to do or start planning it with her. 😒😒

I think the best thing for K&M (and all the rest of the couples) is to dissolve the marriage on DD, so the show will pay for their divorces. 

Then, should each so desire, they can start seeing each other on an ongoing basis and see how they wish to proceed in their relationships with the cameras off.

With what I know about the show, that will never happen, but I think that would be best for all concerned.. 

None of these people are "spring chickens."  They are seasoned adults.  Marriage should be a serious commitment.

[Elizzikra]

56 minutes ago, pdlinda said:

I think the best thing for K&M (and all the rest of the couples) is to dissolve the marriage on DD, so the show will pay for their divorces. 

Then, should each so desire, they can start seeing each other on an ongoing basis and see how they wish to proceed in their relationships with the cameras off.

With what I know about the show, that will never happen, but I think that would be best for all concerned.. 

None of these people are "spring chickens."  They are seasoned adults.  Marriage should be a serious commitment.

If everyone is going to do that, why go on the show at all?

I’ve always thought that D-Day was a bit contrived. To me, if there is any foundation for an ongoing relationship at all, I’d stay married on D-Day and see if we could work things out. If not, you can always get divorced later (I guess the show does pay for it and if you have concerns about a spouse accruing joint debt during the marriage, that’s maybe a different story). I’d get divorced on D-day if I really felt that we were just fundamentally incompatible or, of course, if the relationship was abusive.

[princelina]

On 10/19/2022 at 10:28 PM, Adeejay said:

The experts tend to put a lot of weight on D-day, but by the reunion most of the couples have split.  Last season for example, four couples said “Yes” and today, only Ola and Katina are still together.  I can’t help but wonder if they get a bonus for every couple that says “Yes”.  I have a feeling that none of these couple are going to make it to Christmas. 

Although I could pick out a lot of "red flags" that I've seen based on what we're shown, I think all four of these couples seem to like each other well enough to say yes on decision day and give it some time without cameras.  I always hate how they act like you're stuck for life or can never see each other again!  And I do think they make them list all of the reasons they wouldn't say yes just to amp up the suspense for the viewers.

As for Nate and Stacia - didn't he tell Cal a few episodes ago that he was starting to love her, and Cal said why haven't you told her, and he said he was waiting for the right time?  It will not come for him if she's constantly hounding him about it.  I think she should give it a rest and give him the opportunity to make the gesture.

[Lindz]

True to form, Stacia criticized & threw Nate under the bus IN FRONT OF THE GROUP!!! How doesn't she see how destructive that is?!! Idiot! She uses the group chats to say to him what they should discuss privately. She should know better, yet calls him immature. I hope she's embarrassed when she watches it back. 😒😒

[Yeah No]

10 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I think we all know there is a distinction between love and being 'in love' with someone. Being in love usually means you have a deep emotional attachment and bond to someone nearly bordering on infatuation. It is a real thing. Under its spell one is likely to let red flags sail right by them with out notice. They project perfection in the person they are in love with and become disillusioned if they become mere mortals. I would give falling in love second place to compatibility, trustworthiness , fun to be with. Not identical but similar goals and aspirations. Mutual respect and trust. Too bad I didn't learn that when I was courting... 

I wouldn't say that about falling in love unless you're talking about an immature person who is unrealistic and letting themselves be captivated and carried away by their emotions to the exclusion of all rationality.  When mature people fall in love they are able to do so without losing their heads or letting the red flags go by them nor do they idealize the person to an unrealistic degree.  Falling in love gets a bad reputation because of that but it's absolutely necessary to the success of a long term romantic relationship unless the people involved are willing and able to shut down that need in them to accept a relationship without that aspect.  Some people do so because they don't need to feel "in love" but most that do it do so because they have issues and problems with allowing themselves to trust anyone that much to let them have that much control over their happiness.  So they settle for something not that fulfilling.  Most of the time that doesn't work out.  Or maybe they're just hung up on the word and are really in love but don't want to admit it to themselves or their partner.  Falling in love is that extra dimension to loving a person that transcends and goes beyond loving someone.  I am still "in love" with my husband after 42 years (44 if you count before marriage).  It's that extra dose of romance people tend to want in their romantic relationships.  Call it fantasy or whatever you want but it's that little somethin-somethin that puts the icing on the cake.  I can still see my husband as the knight in shining armor, the prince of mythology, the Scottish piper, etc., etc.  When he gives me flowers I still melt.  It's corny and all that but it's what makes a romantic relationship more exciting.

Edited October 22, 2022 by Yeah No

[Yeah No]

13 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

Frankly, I wouldn't expect any MAFS partner to be ready to say "I love you" after only eight weeks of living together.  I could see them really liking each other and saying yes on Decision Day so they can live away from the cameras and give themselves time to see if they grow to love each other.  That's why I get suspicious when they say "I love you" after only a few weeks, and why I don't believe Miguel means it.   

I personally have never been in any romantic relationship where I didn't know before 8 weeks whether I loved someone and was ready to say it.  When it was right, it's right and I knew it pretty soon.  Certainly people have different timetables for that but I think these people have even more information to go on with their partners than if they were dating because they live with them right out of the gate and are theoretically with them every day for those 8 weeks.  I personally think some of the reason it takes some of these people longer is either because they're with the wrong person or they have issues with trust and allowing themselves to fall in love (like Nate does).  That doesn't mean that someone who does say "I love you" before 8 weeks really means it either and I don't profess to know whether Miguel in particular does or doesn't.

[kristen111]

On 10/19/2022 at 10:28 PM, Adeejay said:

The experts tend to put a lot of weight on D-day, but by the reunion most of the couples have split.  Last season for example, four couples said “Yes” and today, only Ola and Katina are still together.  I can’t help but wonder if they get a bonus for every couple that says “Yes”.  I have a feeling that none of these couple are going to make it to Christmas. 

You are so right.  They could stay together on D Day, then get divorced down the road.  DDay is bogus.

[kristen111]

My thoughts, if I may.  
Fire the Experts.  They are useless.

Alexia was only on for exposure.  Between her outrageous clothes, the hair and boobage, she was there to get noticed.  I didn’t understand one thing she said.  I think she didn’t know either.  Don’t call him Baby, Honey, etc. , you didn’t want him from the beginning.  He wasn’t your cup of tea.  She wasn’t all that like she thought she was.

Mitch reminds me of a beach bum picking up garbage.  Why did they put them together?  He loves his life on the surf board and beach friends, and doesn’t want the picket fence and kids.  I feel bad for Krysten.  That was cruel.  He’s a free spirit.

Lindy would drive a person crazy with her constant crying, whining, etc.  Miguel is a weirdo.  I don’t see them lasting.  They both are head cases.

Statia and Nate .. I just don’t know about him, as he doesn’t reveal too much.  They were probably forced to use all those sex toys, which looked ridiculous.

[Meowwww]

21 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I think we all know there is a distinction between love and being 'in love' with someone. Being in love usually means you have a deep emotional attachment and bond to someone nearly bordering on infatuation. It is a real thing. Under its spell one is likely to let red flags sail right by them with out notice. They project perfection in the person they are in love with and become disillusioned if they become mere mortals. I would give falling in love second place to compatibility, trustworthiness , fun to be with. Not identical but similar goals and aspirations. Mutual respect and trust. Too bad I didn't learn that when I was courting... 

I'm in love with my husband and have been for many many years, and I see all his red flags.  I'm not infatuated, I'm not disillusioned, I'm not projecting perfection onto him (God no lol).  I'm sorry your experiences with being in love have been so awful.  

I think Krysten is just biding her time and will be a no on DD.  Mitch isn't what she needs, I believe.  But I adore her, she's giving it the good ol' college try. 

[LuvMyShows]

On 10/20/2022 at 11:52 AM, Spectator said:

It looks like Alexis is going to whip out some sort of written gripe list on DD. Even if she softens the message with some niceties here and there, the fact that she needed to write down and recite her insults for the world to hear in just the right way is just plain awful. 

I am really hoping that's the editing monkeys at play, and what really happens is that after she says the awful things she has experienced, she then says something like, "But that was before I met Justin, and he has made me feel so good...."

On 10/20/2022 at 12:40 PM, cinsays said:

I have no idea who the moderator is - is she another blogger or what? I guess she gave her name but I didn't get it.

The moderator was one of the women who has been a panelist on those filler shows usually hosted by Kevin Frazier. Her name is Emily Longeretta and she is the Senior TV Features Editor of Variety.

On 10/20/2022 at 3:40 PM, Empress1 said:

No, I think she was like 29 or 30 on her season and Jamie was a few years older - but I do remember her and Jamie saying they didn’t want kids on their season. I guess they changed their minds.

I guess it was on Couples Cam, but we have seen them discussing their desire to have kids and plans to start working on it.  IIRC, she was particularly interested when Jess (of Austin and Jess) got pregnant.

[LuvMyShows]

12 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I personally have never been in any romantic relationship where I didn't know before 8 weeks whether I loved someone and was ready to say it.  When it was right, it's right and I knew it pretty soon.  Certainly people have different timetables for that but I think these people have even more information to go on with their partners than if they were dating because they live with them right out of the gate and are theoretically with them every day for those 8 weeks. 

There are sooo many factors that go into something like knowing if it's love.  The flip side of the MAFS situation of the couples being together for 8 weeks, is that they knew nothing about the person first.  IRL, you almost always know something about the person before your relationship becomes romantic, whether it was knowing them as a friend, co-worker, teammate, on-line, etc.  That gives you more time to have formed opinions about different aspects of the person that ultimately end up factoring in to a love determination, before it even becomes romantic.  The 'love countdown clock' starts for the MAFS folks when they literally do not know anything about the other person.  Likewise IRL, a couple's 8-week trajectory may or may not include enough data points (dates, time together, seeing them interact with others, pace of physical progression) to form an ILY opinion so soon.  I don't look sideways at all on any MAFS folks or people IRL who don't know at 8 weeks whether they love the person, let alone are in love with the person.

[Empress1]

1 hour ago, LuvMyShows said:

I guess it was on Couples Cam, but we have seen them discussing their desire to have kids and plans to start working on it.

Gotcha. I don’t watch Couples Cam.

[StatisticalOutlier]

3 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

Quote

No, I think she was like 29 or 30 on her season and Jamie was a few years older - but I do remember her and Jamie saying they didn’t want kids on their season. I guess they changed their minds.

I guess it was on Couples Cam, but we have seen them discussing their desire to have kids and plans to start working on it.  IIRC, she was particularly interested when Jess (of Austin and Jess) got pregnant.

I thought that during the application process, they both said wanted kids even though they didn't, because they knew they wouldn't be selected if they said they didn't want kids.  They did this individually, and then later, during the season, found out neither one wanted to have kids, and it was sheer luck these two who'd lied about wanting kids were matched.

But then they changed their minds and both of them do want kids?  My head is spinning.

[kristen111]

On 10/20/2022 at 3:46 AM, Ms.C. said:

Not many comments. Odd to me.  I freakin love Krysten.  She deserves somebody as multidimensional and fun as she us.  Mitch is a total bore.  I think potential if he had the energy but really he’s robo.  Emotionally vacant. I wonder why he wanted MAFS?

He wanted good food, a nice vacation and sex.  Then, back to his old life.  That’s ok if he hurt someone in the process .. he’s selfish.

[cinsays]

12 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I thought that during the application process, they both said wanted kids even though they didn't, because they knew they wouldn't be selected if they said they didn't want kids.  They did this individually, and then later, during the season, found out neither one wanted to have kids, and it was sheer luck these two who'd lied about wanting kids were matched.

But then they changed their minds and both of them do want kids?  My head is spinning.

probably thinks it will get them more coverage on tv, maybe their own little spinoff!

10 hours ago, kristen111 said:

He wanted good food, a nice vacation and sex.  Then, back to his old life.  That’s ok if he hurt someone in the process .. he’s selfish.

agreed

a better match would have been krysten and justin and alexis and mitch

justin would adore krysten and wants a family

alexis can go clubbing and mitch can ride the waves

[Yeah No]

16 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

There are sooo many factors that go into something like knowing if it's love.  The flip side of the MAFS situation of the couples being together for 8 weeks, is that they knew nothing about the person first.  IRL, you almost always know something about the person before your relationship becomes romantic, whether it was knowing them as a friend, co-worker, teammate, on-line, etc.  That gives you more time to have formed opinions about different aspects of the person that ultimately end up factoring in to a love determination, before it even becomes romantic.  The 'love countdown clock' starts for the MAFS folks when they literally do not know anything about the other person.  Likewise IRL, a couple's 8-week trajectory may or may not include enough data points (dates, time together, seeing them interact with others, pace of physical progression) to form an ILY opinion so soon.  I don't look sideways at all on any MAFS folks or people IRL who don't know at 8 weeks whether they love the person, let alone are in love with the person.

I don't generally count knowing someone peripherally as "knowing" them the way these couples get to know each other.  It's much easier for people to misrepresent themselves and/or to get a different impression of them when you know them only online or from some kind of a distance, so to me that doesn't really make much difference in my opinion.  That's not getting to know them the way these couples are getting to know each other.  They are completely immersed in each other every single day from day one and the show forces them into situations to push them into finding out what they're really all about, the biggest one being living together.

I think the hesitancy on MAFS in many cases may not be derived from not knowing the person well enough or even if one is in love with them at all, but whether they want to stay married to the person and spend the rest of their lives with them.  That may be something for which 8 weeks is not long enough to make a decision.  But for falling in love - eh, I think 8 weeks is enough, especially under these circumstances where they are completely immersed in the person and probably know way more about each other after those 8 weeks than any couple who is meeting online and then just dating. 

Also, how many successful couples on this show were not "in love" with each other by decision day?  Maybe one or two if that?  I think that's proof right there that if you're not in love with the person by 8 weeks, it's a safe bet that it's not happenin' ever.

Edited October 23, 2022 by Yeah No

[kristen111]

23 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

There are sooo many factors that go into something like knowing if it's love.  The flip side of the MAFS situation of the couples being together for 8 weeks, is that they knew nothing about the person first.  IRL, you almost always know something about the person before your relationship becomes romantic, whether it was knowing them as a friend, co-worker, teammate, on-line, etc.  That gives you more time to have formed opinions about different aspects of the person that ultimately end up factoring in to a love determination, before it even becomes romantic.  The 'love countdown clock' starts for the MAFS folks when they literally do not know anything about the other person.  Likewise IRL, a couple's 8-week trajectory may or may not include enough data points (dates, time together, seeing them interact with others, pace of physical progression) to form an ILY opinion so soon.  I don't look sideways at all on any MAFS folks or people IRL who don't know at 8 weeks whether they love the person, let alone are in love with the person.

I think you know it’s love when you don’t want him going out with anyone else and He doesn’t want to see you with anyone else.  Then, you both realize it’s love.  In my case, he told the guys we worked with I was off the market, and that was that.

[bref]

Sometimes people who think they don't want kids end up changing their minds for a variety of reasons. I did, and it wasn't because I was getting a show out of it. :) 

[Chatty Cake]

I don’t think any of them would make good parents. Maybe Krysten but not with Mitch.  Maybe Miguel but definitely not Lindy. She’ll make the poor man do everything while she complains that if she’s low he needs to step it up. 
I thought Nate did love Stacia but now not so much. I’m guessing her house sent him over the edge. She wants to dictate where they live and keep the home pristine even though she supposedly wants kids. He said there’s no having fun with kids, this is not someone you should force into parenthood Stacia. 
Mitch enjoyed his work trip and the freedom he had from his marriage. I’ll be shocked if he says yes on decision day.

Edited October 24, 2022 by Chatty Cake

[geej]

On 10/21/2022 at 12:40 PM, Lindz said:

Mitch's vision of after DD life is living apart for a week?!! HUH?! AND??!! WTF?! I can't believe Krysten just accepted that. HOW could he think that was sufficient?!!! His lack of thought is very disturbing. & he's still only thinking of himself because he didn't ask her what she wanted to do or start planning it with her. 😒😒

I think she did not SAY anything out loud is because she thought really loudly, "oh no, I can't and won't handle that!" She's outtie.

[kristen111]

On 10/22/2022 at 4:01 PM, Empress1 said:

Gotcha. I don’t watch Couples Cam.

Where’s Couples Cam?  It’s not on Demand.

[Yeah No]

36 minutes ago, kristen111 said:

Where’s Couples Cam?  It’s not on Demand.

It hasn't been on this season, and I don't think last season either.  They took it off the air.   It was getting a little boring but now I wish we had some update on what the couples are doing these days.  Maybe a few shows a season but not every week.

[Empress1]

On 10/22/2022 at 6:15 PM, StatisticalOutlier said:

I thought that during the application process, they both said wanted kids even though they didn't, because they knew they wouldn't be selected if they said they didn't want kids.  They did this individually, and then later, during the season, found out neither one wanted to have kids, and it was sheer luck these two who'd lied about wanting kids were matched.

This is what I remember, because I remember thinking how dumb it was to lie about something about which there can be no compromise. But they’re allowed to change their minds. It’s a good thing that they BOTH changed their minds; if one changed their mind and the other didn’t, it might be the end.

[Elizzikra]

1 hour ago, Empress1 said:

This is what I remember, because I remember thinking how dumb it was to lie about something about which there can be no compromise. But they’re allowed to change their minds. It’s a good thing that they BOTH changed their minds; if one changed their mind and the other didn’t, it might be the end.

I remember them saying their applications both said they wanted kids but they also both said they were "leaning towards" no. I don't remember either ever flat out saying "I don't want kids."

[Retired at last]

I realized that this show has been the exact same for at least the last 6 weeks. The same discussions, different locations. I don't know how much losing a couple has forced these redundant discussions, but it is too much. The only dynamic that seems to have changed slightly is Krysten and Mitch. She has been over it since almost the beginning and I don't think anyone believes her when she says she feels hopeful. And when she talks about being happy with any crumb he gives her, I want to throw something. I do think that once she has decided that they are done, she has become more outgoing (wine fueled?) and actually obnoxious. I really liked her and don't anymore. I just hope that she gets to make her decision first and dumps him. He will probably looked shocked and won't see it coming.

I hope that what we are seeing with Stasia and Nate is all production. Otherwise, she is horrible and cold and doesn't listen to him. She has one thing in her head and that is that he MUST love her on a specific scale. I don't know how they can be happy since Nate will not be allowed to contribute anything to their home. I hope he learns where to place that tray on their bed at the right angle or she will send him to the garage for punishment.

This season's polarizing couple is Lindy and Miguel. We are either on one team or the other. That really hasn't changed much. I am still Team Miguel and I think that living with her would be exhausting. Some of his language could be better, in terms of communicating with her, but she is just too much for me.

I look for the reunion to be a reunion of Justin and Mya. Alexis doesn't need anyone but herself since that is all she has room for. Is this week D Day?

[Lindz]

I have no idea who will choose to stay married & who will choose to divorce! Good job show for making it difficult to predict! I can't wait til the reunion to get reactions to the smack talk others' said. 🤣🤣

[Lindz]

Maybe Krysten will be added to the list of women who've said divorce & made us proud. Lindy... Probably not. She's scared to lose him, so.

[Jax7917]

On 10/22/2022 at 1:57 AM, Yeah No said:

I personally have never been in any romantic relationship where I didn't know before 8 weeks whether I loved someone and was ready to say it.  When it was right, it's right and I knew it pretty soon.  Certainly people have different timetables for that but I think these people have even more information to go on with their partners than if they were dating because they live with them right out of the gate and are theoretically with them every day for those 8 weeks.  I personally think some of the reason it takes some of these people longer is either because they're with the wrong person or they have issues with trust and allowing themselves to fall in love (like Nate does).  That doesn't mean that someone who does say "I love you" before 8 weeks really means it either and I don't profess to know whether Miguel in particular does or doesn't.

What always makes me confused with the participants on this show is that every single one of them that sign up are willing to make this huge commitment of marrying a stranger, but so many of them are so hesitant and adamant on not saying they love the person even if they do because it's "too soon." Soo you're willing to legally marry a person you don't know but saying a few words is scaring you? Makes no sense to me. It's up there with the participants not loving their partners looks and being checked out on day 1 even though they knew that was a very strong possibility since they knew they weren't going to meet their spouse before the alter. 

[Retired at last]

What I don't understand is that after the show has been filmed and shown on TV, we hear from former participants who go on and on about the editing and that we don't see what actually happens, and they get mad when they are portrayed in a certain way (Alyssa, Morgan, many others). Don't these people watch the show? Don't they read their contract which clearly states that Lifetime has the right to edit anything in any way they want? Did Morgan think that she would be portrayed in a happy, positive light? We know that Alyssa was expecting the "f'ing good person" edit, but, seriously. The ONLY reason people go on the show is to somehow become "famous" or get followers for SM. There may be one or two people who really think they will be matched with their "person," but, by this time, they have no grounds to complain. I do wonder when production decides who will be the villains - if that is part of their casting or if they decide that after they actually meet the people?

[Mr. Miner]

13 hours ago, Lindz said:

Lindy... Probably not. She's scared to lose him, so.

Lindy... Probably not. She's scared to lose her health insurance, so.  FTFY!

[silverspoons]

6 hours ago, Retired at last said:

What I don't understand is that after the show has been filmed and shown on TV, we hear from former participants who go on and on about the editing and that we don't see what actually happens, and they get mad when they are portrayed in a certain way (Alyssa, Morgan, many others). Don't these people watch the show? Don't they read their contract which clearly states that Lifetime has the right to edit anything in any way they want? Did Morgan think that she would be portrayed in a happy, positive light? We know that Alyssa was expecting the "f'ing good person" edit, but, seriously. The ONLY reason people go on the show is to somehow become "famous" or get followers for SM. There may be one or two people who really think they will be matched with their "person," but, by this time, they have no grounds to complain. I do wonder when production decides who will be the villains - if that is part of their casting or if they decide that after they actually meet the people?

Do these people watch the show? Most do not or seem to maybe have seen one season casually.  There have been a few dire hard fan of the show and it shows (kind of like Big brother feed watchers vs just show).  Krysten this season said she has watch ed the show for years with her family and it shows that she is trying her best with maybe not exactly what she wanted. Past cast that said they watched the show were Kristine, Jessica ,Stephanie and AJ (they both watched the show) Mindy, Ashley  Greg, so it shows if people watch the show, they are more likely to at least try (not walk away when they are not attracted at least).  

I think the producers should make them watch the show before commiting, but I wonder if it would scare too many away. From reading stories of people recruited MAFS likes to give the success rate as those that say yes on D day and not the rate of people who break up a by reunion. I think MAFS wants recruits to not know the show and the poor success rate. 

[sara416]

On 10/20/2022 at 11:05 AM, Spectator said:

This comment made me laugh out loud because the fact that you are questioning the screening shows exactly how poor the process actually is. In short yes, but no…the show claims they do extensive interviews, personality tests, background checks, home visits, etc, all to ensure that the “experts” have made perfect matches. They even devote multiple episodes to the pairing process. But there is example after example that they do a terrible job at it or they are deliberately ignoring all of their screening metrics to create more explosive pairings for more interesting TV. Hard to say for sure which it is, probably both, but in past seasons they’ve cast some doozies. A few examples: one guy threatened to kill his wife and her family, one woman was arrested on an outstanding warrant as they were trying to board the plane to go to their honeymoon, another guy seemed to have a pretty obvious drug problem, others were dating other people while being married at first sight and one was engaged to someone else just a few months before the program started filming. Even basic characteristics like someone with a fear of allergy to dogs will get paired with someone with multiple aggressive dogs. It’s nuts. You get the idea….

Pretty much every single person on this forum could do a better job of matching people than these supposed “experts”. We all detect the obvious personality mismatches with these couple after just one episode. 

I know the other people you are talking about, but who had a drug problem?

[Yeah No]

15 hours ago, Jax7917 said:

What always makes me confused with the participants on this show is that every single one of them that sign up are willing to make this huge commitment of marrying a stranger, but so many of them are so hesitant and adamant on not saying they love the person even if they do because it's "too soon." Soo you're willing to legally marry a person you don't know but saying a few words is scaring you? Makes no sense to me. It's up there with the participants not loving their partners looks and being checked out on day 1 even though they knew that was a very strong possibility since they knew they weren't going to meet their spouse before the alter. 

I know, it makes you wonder WTF they expected.  Marrying the person sight unseen is "too soon" all by itself so why are they surprised when the feelings don't just materialize?  Maybe they get caught up in an unrealistic fantasy about how it's going to click from day one and think the feelings will just happen.  Or they think they're ready to settle down with whoever they get but assume whoever it is will meet their expectations.  Like haven't they watched the show and know by now that the track record of that happening isn't that good?  They must think anyone they get on the show would be better than who they would pick.  But the problem is often not who they get but their own hang ups that prevent them from falling in love.   I think Nate is one of those.  I think he's crazy about Stacia but his hang ups about love are getting in the way.  I think Stacia knows this and is losing patience with him so she is trying to "force" him into a corner to admit that he loves her, which may or may not be the best strategy.  That can backfire with someone with that issue. 

The first step of commitment these people take is "external" in getting married.  It doesn't depend on their feelings and they can force themselves into it knowing it can easily be undone.  But the second, even more important step of commitment is the internal one from the heart, and that's the one they can't force themselves to make and their commitment issues will sabotage it from happening.  That's my take on it, anyway.

[SabineElisabeth]

On 10/20/2022 at 11:05 AM, Spectator said:

. . .but in past seasons they’ve cast some doozies. A few examples: one guy threatened to kill his wife and her family, one woman was arrested on an outstanding warrant as they were trying to board the plane to go to their honeymoon, another guy seemed to have a pretty obvious drug problem . . .

8 hours ago, sara416 said:

I know the other people you are talking about, but who had a drug problem?

I can't remember names, but maybe she's talking about the guy on the season filmed in Miami who smoked weed during the honeymoon?  If I remember correctly, he was adamant it was no big deal, and his wife, who I believe peace'd out before the honeymoon was even over, was equally adamant that he had a serious substance abuse problem.

Fast-forwarding to this season . . . Justin and Alexis make me wish for something to dull the awkwardness of their scenes.  I personally don't care for either of them, and I think they're horrible together.

My other least favorite person this season is Lindy.  She is soooo annoyingly immature.  Personally, I can't stand it when women act all bratty and then insist their partner "hold them accountable" or however they happen to phrase it.  No!  Grow the f*** up and hold your own damn self accountable!  Do you want a partner, or a freakin' daddy?  And the fit Lindy threw over Miguel adding her to his health insurance bugs me to this day.  The amount of righteous indignation she had towards Miguel was actually insane given that Lindy herself doesn't care enough about having health insurance to freaking get out of bed in the morning and WORK.  While I consider it be a massively immature choice, it's her choice to make - but choices have consequences.  So, STFU and stop complaining about your student loan debt and stop trying to guilt trip Miguel over health insurance.  Ugh!

My two favorites this season are Nate and Krysten.  Nate seems to see things pretty clearly and is straight-forward without using it as an excuse to be mean.  He's also taken a lot of crap from Stacia in stride - such as the prenup - but I can't blame him for eventually getting frustrated with her.  She does in fact talk in circles, and she's always critical, then tries to claim she didn't say whatever critical thing she just said when Nate calls her on it.  However, I think that Stacia (and Nate) would be just fine with a little bit of coaching and a few small tweaks.  Too bad the experts don't seem to give two f***s about the couples anymore (compared to the first few seasons).

As for Krysten, I have a major girl crush.  She's smart, funny, easy-going, ambitious, caring, mature, thoughtful, gracious . . . and super pretty, imo.  Mitch lucked the f*** out getting matched with her, and I kept hoping (more for Krysten's sake, really) that he could rise to the occasion and be the kind of partner Krysten deserves . . . but maybe that's too much to expect in 8 weeks.  If they don't make it, though, it will be his loss - which I think he kind of realizes, actually, but not feeling confident that's going to be enough to get him over the finish line.  

Edited October 26, 2022 by SabineElisabeth

[Yeah No]

1 hour ago, SabineElisabeth said:

I can't remember names, but maybe she's talking about the guy on the season filmed in Miami who smoked weed during the honeymoon?  If I remember correctly, he was adamant it was no big deal, and his wife, who I believe peace'd out before the honeymoon was even over, was equally adamant that he had a serious substance abuse problem.

Yeah I think that would be Derek, who was married to Heather, the flight attendant.  Although no one ever mentioned that he did drugs or weed in particular - she said it was his "smoking habit" that she couldn't live with.  Everyone just assumed it couldn't have been only about cigarettes but must have been her disapproval of his smoking weed.  I thought her real issue with this was might have been because she thought it would negatively reflect upon her employment as a flight attendant and maybe even cost her her job if her employer thought she might also be doing it.  Also it was just not her lifestyle. I actually think her major objection to it was one of degree because she had initially told him it was OK if he smoked but then when she saw how much of it he was doing it turned her way off and gave her a negative impression of him, which I think she would have gotten anyway without the "smoking".  He tried to make the excuse that he was doing more of it than usual because he was on "vacation mode", but she wasn't buying it.  I think the "smoking" was the thing that tipped her over into calling it quits only 10 days into the marriage.

Edited October 26, 2022 by Yeah No

[sara416]

Oh yeah, that guy. They kept emphasizing that she said it was okay if he smoked "occasionally" but he seemed to be doing it constantly. And they just kept saying "smoking" but it was most definitely weed. It's definitely a hard line and ridiculous to think you could pair a guy who wakes and bakes with someone who doesn't do it at all. 

[Welshman in Ca]

48 minutes ago, sara416 said:

Oh yeah, that guy. They kept emphasizing that she said it was okay if he smoked "occasionally" but he seemed to be doing it constantly. And they just kept saying "smoking" but it was most definitely weed. It's definitely a hard line and ridiculous to think you could pair a guy who wakes and bakes with someone who doesn't do it at all. 

How do you know it was definitely weed ? 

Seemed to me that he was just smoking & she wasn't on board with how much he was smoking during the honeymoon. Being a smoker at the time (gave up 3 years ago) I thought she lied on her application about being okay with a light smoker as most women who don't smoke wouldn't date a smoker never mind marry one no matter how light.

[theartandsound]

On 10/24/2022 at 8:41 AM, Yeah No said:

It hasn't been on this season, and I don't think last season either.  They took it off the air.   It was getting a little boring but now I wish we had some update on what the couples are doing these days.  Maybe a few shows a season but not every week.

I miss Couples Cam, even if most of it was set up situations as the show went on. I agree with doing a few shows a season (3-6 maybe?), because those are the only updates we are ever going to get on this show given its abysmal "success" rate these days.

Also, the main show's reason for existing now seems to be, "Let's see how we can ruin all of these pairings at the end of 17 episodes." Ugh.

[cinsays]

47 minutes ago, theartandsound said:

I miss Couples Cam, even if most of it was set up situations as the show went on. I agree with doing a few shows a season (3-6 maybe?), because those are the only updates we are ever going to get on this show given its abysmal "success" rate these days.

Also, the main show's reason for existing now seems to be, "Let's see how we can ruin all of these pairings at the end of 17 episodes." Ugh.

if you miss couples cam you can follow the couples on facebook, etc to see what they are up to these days

[kristen111]

7 hours ago, SabineElisabeth said:

I can't remember names, but maybe she's talking about the guy on the season filmed in Miami who smoked weed during the honeymoon?  If I remember correctly, he was adamant it was no big deal, and his wife, who I believe peace'd out before the honeymoon was even over, was equally adamant that he had a serious substance abuse problem.

Fast-forwarding to this season . . . Justin and Alexis make me wish for something to dull the awkwardness of their scenes.  I personally don't care for either of them, and I think they're horrible together.

My other least favorite person this season is Lindy.  She is soooo annoyingly immature.  Personally, I can't stand it when women act all bratty and then insist their partner "hold them accountable" or however they happen to phrase it.  No!  Grow the f*** up and hold your own damn self accountable!  Do you want a partner, or a freakin' daddy?  And the fit Lindy threw over Miguel adding her to his health insurance bugs me to this day.  The amount of righteous indignation she had towards Miguel was actually insane given that Lindy herself doesn't care enough about having health insurance to freaking get out of bed in the morning and WORK.  While I consider it be a massively immature choice, it's her choice to make - but choices have consequences.  So, STFU and stop complaining about your student loan debt and stop trying to guilt trip Miguel over health insurance.  Ugh!

My two favorites this season are Nate and Krysten.  Nate seems to see things pretty clearly and is straight-forward without using it as an excuse to be mean.  He's also taken a lot of crap from Stacia in stride - such as the prenup - but I can't blame him for eventually getting frustrated with her.  She does in fact talk in circles, and she's always critical, then tries to claim she didn't say whatever critical thing she just said when Nate calls her on it.  However, I think that Stacia (and Nate) would be just fine with a little bit of coaching and a few small tweaks.  Too bad the experts don't seem to give two f***s about the couples anymore (compared to the first few seasons).

As for Krysten, I have a major girl crush.  She's smart, funny, easy-going, ambitious, caring, mature, thoughtful, gracious . . . and super pretty, imo.  Mitch lucked the f*** out getting matched with her, and I kept hoping (more for Krysten's sake, really) that he could rise to the occasion and be the kind of partner Krysten deserves . . . but maybe that's too much to expect in 8 weeks.  If they don't make it, though, it will be his loss - which I think he kind of realizes, actually, but not feeling confident that's going to be enough to get him over the finish line.  

He can’t wait to have some down time by himself whether they stay together or not.  The surfboard and friends are calling him in his head.  She comes to the last dinner all decked out with boob age and starts talking seriously for the last time.  He is too busy eating his last good meal with her like it’s his last forever.  No couth.  Krysten deserves much better, but if she’s happy with him, I’m happy for her.

Imo, Alexis answers first.  She says yes.  Then he says No.  I only hope that happens.  She was lying on the bed all sexy posing with her hat on hoping he will say stay, like she’s the cats meow.  That final slap in her face will be from his dog saying NO.  She would only make him miserable going clubbing with the girls.  She’s too full of herself.

Statia and Nate.  If I only knew what the hell they are talking about.  

I only hope next season they stop with the teeth brushing.

[kristen111]

So ole Mitch is now contemplating whether he wants to be married or single, now that times up.  Why the hell is he thinking now .. why not before he st@rted this whole dabacle?   Eight weeks ago, he was in for marriage and found a wonderful woman.  Now he’s deciding?  It’s not right.

Edited October 26, 2022 by kristen111

[LuvMyShows]

On 10/24/2022 at 8:02 AM, kristen111 said:

Where’s Couples Cam?  It’s not on Demand.

Here's a link  https://play.mylifetime.com/shows/married-at-first-sight-couples-cam/season-10

On 10/25/2022 at 12:53 PM, Retired at last said:

I do wonder when production decides who will be the villains - if that is part of their casting or if they decide that after they actually meet the people?

I think they get directional ideas from their casting, but then lose control over the narrative after filming starts.  For example, Woody was portrayed as a serious playa, and I'm sure the producers were amped up for the ensuing drama.  But that was basically never an issue for him and Amani.  They clearly set up sweet Chris when they matched him with "Ace", but I don't think they had any idea how much gold they would be able to mine from that relationship.

[Yeah No]

2 hours ago, cinsays said:

if you miss couples cam you can follow the couples on facebook, etc to see what they are up to these days

Speaking for myself I'm not a social media person.  I'd rather see a special on TV every now and then.  I don't even follow my own friends on social media let alone would I follow these people.

[kristen111]

9 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

Speaking for myself I'm not a social media person.  I'd rather see a special on TV every now and then.  I don't even follow my own friends on social media let alone would I follow these people.

No SM for me either.  That’s why I don’t know what’s going on.

Thanks @LuvMyShows for the link.

Im watching MAFS all day.  Alexis is an exhibitionist, and ole Mitch is an asshole.  Slurping his food every minute like he never ate before.  Ugh.

Edited October 26, 2022 by kristen111