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S07.E06: Wake Up Call


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Jazz just refuses to accept responsibility for anything in her life. Saying Sander is only focusing on the "negative" - what POSITIVE is there to focus on? She had to call her mom to help her grocery shop and her mom is still doing her meds, all while insisting that "it will be different this time" and "I can do it on my own." It's obvious at this point that she has asked for help in doing better and then consistently flaked out and the family is sick of spending time and energy when she has no intention of making effort. When you've developed a reputation for flaking you can't get mad that people want to see proof that you've changed before they invest in helping you again.

And in the end, she gave up on her weight loss totally, which just highlights everyone's point. Any bit of stress and she completely falls apart, she's not in a good place at all right now, especially to be going off to Harvard and being an "independent adult."

Edited by missnoa
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She’s taking a heavy load of medication (17 pills!) a day. No mention that this may have an effect on her lethargy and weight gain. She is in no shape to go to a competitive place like Harvard. She should get her own apartment and see if she can handle community college. Get her feet wet, so to speak. She needs therapy, but I suspect that she’s depending on just the meds. I have no sympathy for her mom as she caused some of this situation ( in my point of view). It’s obvious that the family after years of exhaustive support, is over Jazz and her problems.  And damn, Jazz, you give up on weight loss after a few weeks?

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45 minutes ago, missnoa said:

Jazz just refuses to accept responsibility for anything in her life. Saying Sander is only focusing on the "negative" - what POSITIVE is there to focus on? She had to call her mom to help her grocery shop and her mom is still doing her meds, all while insisting that "it will be different this time" and "I can do it on my own." It's obvious at this point that she has asked for help in doing better and then consistently flaked out and the family is sick of spending time and energy when she has no intention of making effort. When you've developed a reputation for flaking you can't get mad that people want to see proof that you've changed before they invest in helping you again.

And in the end, she gave up on her weight loss totally, which just highlights everyone's point. Any bit of stress and she completely falls apart, she's not in a good place at all right now, especially to be going off to Harvard and being an "independent adult."

I disagree. Sander is a pain in the a--. He needs to stop getting all up in her business. She'll find her way, like we all do - clumsily, with many mistakes - and then getting back up off the ground. But the way Sander rails at her, the subtext is all "Be perfect, be perfect, be perfect."  That's the last thing Jazz needs to hear. The only thing you can ever shame someone into is more shame.

I like Greg. He has the most realistic and loving approach. The rest of them need to give Jazz room to breathe - which hopefully she'll get at college. I still wish she had gone to the other school, though.

 

Edited by JeanJean
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Jazz needs to get off TV and away from her family (and trim down the 17 pills a day, holy shit). And no Mom going with her to Harvard is the exact opposite of helpful.
 

I believe Jazz when she says her family only focuses on the negative. That's what I'm seeing just from the TV, who knows how much more they're harping on her off camera?

Edited by PupCal
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I feel so sorry for Jazz.  She was such a happy, positive child and now she seems totally beaten down and exhausted.  The sparkle is gone.  It is beyond me how anyone can think it’s a good idea for her to be dealing with her issues on television for the world to see.

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11 minutes ago, TomGirl said:
20 minutes ago, PupCal said:

 (and trim down the 17 pills a day, holy shit)

 

Seriously! Are they all psychotropic drugs? I'm not a doctor or a pharmacist but it makes me think: No wonder she can't wake up naturally. And have they looked into how those drugs affect the appetite?

Edited by JeanJean
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4 minutes ago, JeanJean said:

Seriously! Are they all psychotropic drugs? I'm not a doctor or a pharmacist but it makes me think: No wonder she can't wake up naturally. And have they looked into how those drugs affect the appetite?

In the past, they mentioned that she has high blood pressure, high cholesterol, asthma, etc so I assumed that some of the medications were for those things. 
 

Sanother uncomfortable episode. I did not need to see janette in lingerie. I get the sense that the family is just tired. On one hand she says she’s in a better place with her mental illness, and then the next she’s saying she can’t get up because of her mental illness. It’s got to be frustrating to have a family member say they are going to do one thing, and ask for their help in doing it, and then not having any follow through. Doesn’t change the fact that sander is an ass. Jazz needsnto hold herself accountable, and Until she does, she won’t be ready for being an adult. She can’t even grocery shop by herself? She isn’t responsible for her medications? I have patients who are 15 years old taking 15-20 pills a day, and they’re able to be responsible for their own medications 

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How did Jazz get into Harvard?  I know she is an activist and a TV Personality but she honestly does not seem that brilliant.   She doesn’t seem to have many basic life skills.  I do know some Ivy League grads who seem to be lacking in common sense but she seems to just be lacking in brains in general.  
 

What was the other college she was considering? 
 

I think Sander is just trying to get as much air time as possible to promote  his videos. 

Edited by Katie111
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2 minutes ago, Katie111 said:

How did Jazz get into Harvard?  I know she is an activist and a TV Personality but she honestly does not seem that brilliant.   She doesn’t seem to have many basic life skills.  I do know some Ivy League grads who seem to be lacking in common sense but she seems to just be lacking in brains in general.  
 

What was the other college she was considering? 

I don't remember the name, but it seemed more artsy-liberal Bennington-esque. Not a limelight school like Harvard, I think. 

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20 minutes ago, JeanJean said:

I don't remember the name, but it seemed more artsy-liberal Bennington-esque. Not a limelight school like Harvard, I think. 

I thought it was a college in CA, I want to say Pomona, but not sure if that is right. Don't have space in my brain to store all this useless info...

Edited by Gramto6
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7 minutes ago, Gramto6 said:

I thought it was a college in CA, I want to say Pomona, but not sure if that is right. Don't have space in my brain to store all this useless info...

I think you're right!!!!!

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I caught some of the show and I am not a usual watcher so maybe I’m out in left field, but wouldn’t they all be better off sending Jazz off to some 90 day rehab/weight loss place/somewhere she could get some therapy while learning some life skills while she’s there? It seems like such an obvious option to me.

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13 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

I caught some of the show and I am not a usual watcher so maybe I’m out in left field, but wouldn’t they all be better off sending Jazz off to some 90 day rehab/weight loss place/somewhere she could get some therapy while learning some life skills while she’s there? It seems like such an obvious option to me.

It does, but sadly I doubt that Jeanette would release her control  over Jazz enough for that to happen. 

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When I saw the part about Jazz reading from her book…it made me think that maybe she’s finally old enough to not only appreciate but be terrified of the academic world challenging her in ways she hasn’t been challenged before, as an adult.  Jeanette won’t be there to go all tigermom when some random person challenges Jazz’s opinions at college.

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4 hours ago, Yokosmom said:

She’s taking a heavy load of medication (17 pills!) a day. No mention that this may have an effect on her lethargy and weight gain. She is in no shape to go to a competitive place like Harvard. She should get her own apartment and see if she can handle community college. Get her feet wet, so to speak. She needs therapy, but I suspect that she’s depending on just the meds. I have no sympathy for her mom as she caused some of this situation ( in my point of view). It’s obvious that the family after years of exhaustive support, is over Jazz and her problems.  And damn, Jazz, you give up on weight loss after a few weeks?

That's a lot of psychiatric medication. I wonder what her diagnosis is and what she is taking. Her weight gain is likely directly connected to her mental illness and the medication. My son has a serious mental illness and takes a similar amount of medications. He gained over 150 pounds in two years,  nearly doubling his weight from high school. Psychiatric meds are notorious for weight gain. It's a struggle and I feel bad for Jazz. It will be difficult, if not impossible, to lose the weight unless she goes off the meds. If she goes off the meds, however,  her mental illness could destroy her. She may also be self medicating with food to deal with her mental problems. She seems so fragile. The last thing she needs right now is to go to a high pressure school like Harvard. She is barely functioning as it is. I see so many similarities with my son who also had a substantial decline in functioning at the same age due to mental illness. 

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I wonder if she’d chosen Pomona, which seemed to truly be her first choice, if she’d be more interested in trying to get herself together. I know she has mental health issues that are playing a role in her inertia, but I also think there may be some passive-aggressiveness going on toward her parents who, it looked to me, pushed her to go to Harvard. 
 

And, Jeannette needs to get her mind wrapped around the idea that there IS a plan B. If Jazz wants to go to college and Harvard’s no longer an option, then she’ll have to do what everyone else who doesn’t get into or can’t afford Harvard does-go to community college or another college she gets into. Jeannette only thinks there’s no Plan B because in her and Greg’s minds, Harvard was THE only option. 

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Jeannette would have been better off getting a makeover/complete overhaul instead of doing the boudoir shoot. She still dresses up in lingerie at 55? Good for her, I guess. But getting rid of the trashy make up & clothing would make her look so much prettier. 
Jazz is a mess. Yes, send her to a weight loss clinic & then intense therapy. That fking wig was ridiculous. 

Edited by chediavolo
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9 hours ago, TomGirl said:

I feel so sorry for Jazz.  She was such a happy, positive child and now she seems totally beaten down and exhausted.  The sparkle is gone.  It is beyond me how anyone can think it’s a good idea for her to be dealing with her issues on television for the world to see.

exactly how I feel this season.  Jazz used to annoy me with her know it all attitude, but this year I am really feeling for her.  She is adrift.  A shame she is on 17 pills a day (although certainly some are hormones and can't do anything about that).  Also, surely some of those pills are making weight loss more difficult (not impossible, just more difficult).  She has my sympathy this season instead of  my ire.   

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8 hours ago, suev3333 said:

I think Jazz wants to be a drag queen.

I think Sander does, too.

Jazz's family is emotionally abusing her.  She was their shiny new thing, promising wealth and fame (which she's delivered to them), but now she's obese, sluggish, and not cute anymore.  20/20 isn't calling for update interviews.  They're angry.

When she hung her head sadly and said "I'm a joke," my heart just broke for her.

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11 hours ago, JeanJean said:

Seriously! Are they all psychotropic drugs?

I think some of the medication has to do with her transitioning from male to female and the surgeries. Hormones, etc.... she will have to take those meds for the rest of her life. Just like she is going to have to dilate every day for the rest of her life.  As for some of the other drugs she is on anti-depressants and anxiety meds, too, right? If she is on blood pressure medication as mentioned upthread then that is the saddest thing ever. Nobody at that age should have high pressure! . What a sad mess she is. 

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1 hour ago, all4mom2 said:

I think Sander does, too.

Jazz's family is emotionally abusing her.  She was their shiny new thing, promising wealth and fame (which she's delivered to them), but now she's obese, sluggish, and not cute anymore.  20/20 isn't calling for update interviews.  They're angry.

When she hung her head sadly and said "I'm a joke," my heart just broke for her.

Ari looks especially done with the whole mess. She barely looks and Jazz and seems to barely tolerate being on the same room with her. Honestly,  it would be hard to be the sibling of such an attention hog as Jazz. It seems the whole focus of the entire family for decades has been All About Jazz. Sander is desperately trying to turn attention to himself. Ari is just checked out. 

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1 hour ago, bichonblitz said:

I think some of the medication has to do with her transitioning from male to female and the surgeries. Hormones, etc.... she will have to take those meds for the rest of her life. Just like she is going to have to dilate every day for the rest of her life.  As for some of the other drugs she is on anti-depressants and anxiety meds, too, right? If she is on blood pressure medication as mentioned upthread then that is the saddest thing ever. Nobody at that age should have high pressure! . What a sad mess she is. 

She's been on antidepressants and anti-anxiety agents forever (since she was 12), and Jeanette mentioned "finding the right drug," so I suspect an anti-psychotic.  Apparently she had a pretty serious breakdown after the surgery (sorry, Jeanette).  At any rate, that would explain gaining 100 pounds in a year, being unable to wake up, slurring her words, looking half asleep all the time, and that weird lip-smacking thing she does now (it could be tardive dyskinesia, which could be permanent).  None of this is Jazz's fault.  Nor will she be able to tame her cravings or lose weight if it's a side effect of the drugs since Jeanette will never let her come off them.

Edited by all4mom2
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58 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

What a sad mess she is.

As I stated above, I’m not a regular viewer but I am aware of the general outline of Jazz’s “journey.” From where I sit, it looks like everything in Jazz’s world was focused on transitioning and surgery and, because she and the people around her put so much emphasis on that, her emotional and psychological problems went unnoticed. She thought (maybe led to believe) that making the full transition was going to be the thing that makes her happy; however, once that was achieved, she could no longer fool herself into believing that after “the next thing,” life would be wonderful and all her problems would be solved. They weren’t. So now what?

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3 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

As I stated above, I’m not a regular viewer but I am aware of the general outline of Jazz’s “journey.” From where I sit, it looks like everything in Jazz’s world was focused on transitioning and surgery and, because she and the people around her put so much emphasis on that, her emotional and psychological problems went unnoticed. She thought (maybe led to believe) that making the full transition was going to be the thing that makes her happy; however, once that was achieved, she could no longer fool herself into believing that after “the next thing,” life would be wonderful and all her problems would be solved. They weren’t. So now what?

That...and puberty blockers are shown to decrease one's IQ by about 10 points.

Puberty is a big part of the maturation of the brain itself.  The drugs don't help!

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22 minutes ago, all4mom2 said:

She's been on antidepressants and anti-anxiety agents forever (since she was 12), and Jeanette mentioned "finding the right drug," so I suspect an anti-psychotic.  Apparently she had a pretty serious breakdown after the surgery (sorry, Jeanette).  At any rate, that would explain gaining 100 pounds in a year, being unable to wake up, slurring her words, looking half asleep all the time, and that weird lip-smacking thing she does now (it could be tardive dyskinesia, which could be permanent).  None of this is Jazz's fault.  Nor will she be able to tame her cravings or lose weight if it's a side effect of the drugs since Jeanette will never let her come off them.

Damn… that’s all really healthy. I hope she finds a way out of this. 

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43 minutes ago, all4mom2 said:

She's been on antidepressants and anti-anxiety agents forever (since she was 12), and Jeanette mentioned "finding the right drug," so I suspect an anti-psychotic.  Apparently she had a pretty serious breakdown after the surgery (sorry, Jeanette).  At any rate, that would explain gaining 100 pounds in a year, being unable to wake up, slurring her words, looking half asleep all the time, and that weird lip-smacking thing she does now (it could be tardive dyskinesia, which could be permanent).  None of this is Jazz's fault.  Nor will she be able to tame her cravings or lose weight if it's a side effect of the drugs since Jeanette will never let her come off them.

Yes, sadly many anti-psychotic medications have very serious side effects. The show could do a lot of good by addressing mental illness issues and the stigma. Janette wants to ignore how serious the problem is.

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11 minutes ago, Desert Rat said:

Yes, sadly many anti-psychotic medications have very serious side effects. The show could do a lot of good by addressing mental illness issues and the stigma. Janette wants to ignore how serious the problem is.

Yes times 1000. They obviously got lots of help from medical professionals when Jazz told them as a young child she was a girl. Time now to stop filming and invest in some serious mental health help. She may need inpatient care, it seems that serious. Greg,  Jeanette and fam are not equipped to handle Jazz' mental health issues. 

Edited by jacksgirl
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I really feel for Jazz this season. I stopped watching this show several seasons ago because it became repetitive and annoying. I hate that the light is gone from her eyes. She's only 20 and she should be enjoying life and having fun with her friends. She has her mind set on a kind of perfection for herself that will probably never be achieved through surgery or hormone therapy. No woman, cis-gender or transgender, has a perfect body. Everyone has something they'd like to change about themselves. I hope that she eventually learns to live for herself. I agree -- attending a school like Harvard would be disastrous for her. Taking some time off to take care of herself and learn who she truly is would be a good start.

 

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23 minutes ago, jacksgirl said:

She may need inpatient care, it seems that serious. Greg,  Jeanette and fam are not equipped to handle Jazz' mental health issues.

The entire family could use some family therapy. The other kids have had to live in Jazz’s shadow because her mother was hyper focused on Jazz, to the detriment of the siblings (which happens often when one kid has “special” needs and the parents unwittingly neglect the other kids). Most importantly, they desperately need to get off of tv and social media. It’s not helping.

With regard to Harvard, no one flunks out. No one. It would ruin Harvard’s stats. I don’t think they even give out a failing grade, even if deserved. They bend over backwards to accommodate students’ issues. The hardest part is getting accepted. Weren’t all the classes held online due to Covid? Couldn’t Jazz attend classes from the comfort of her own home? What am I missing?

Edited by Auntie Anxiety
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Reminder:  Jazz is a woman.  She was and is female.  Per forum rules, there is no debate on that point. Posts have been removed that imply that Jazz would have been better off had she not transitioned/she was never female.  She is a transgender woman.  She was a transgender girl.  

If you have any questions, PM @PrincessPurrsALot directly.  We do not debate mod actions or statements in the forums. 

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I tried to watch a little last night but it was too depressing to watch entirely. This kid is so messed up and so in need of therapy and whomever upthread mentioned an in-patient weight loss/mental health/life skills situation was so spot on! I never even thought of that but it's so true! She needs to go away somewhere where she will be handled with tough love and not allowed to slack off. She has to learn to take care of herself and accept that she is not well, mentally, and needs serious therapy. The weight loss would come, I think, if she was taking care of the mental health stuff. How her parents don't see this is a mystery to me. And sadly, IF they thought of this as an option for her, I think they'd also try to monetize it with cameras present and hopefully no serious facility would allow that. They need to STOP filming her and the family and let them get her the help she truly needs.

We had a member here who was part of the trans community, I forget her name, and she knew Jazz. I wonder if she's still lurking here and if she has any other info to share with us?

ETA: Do we know if

Spoiler

she did indeed go to Cambridge for school this Fall?

 

Edited by gingerella
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33 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

 

With regard to Harvard, no one flunks out. No one. It would ruin Harvard’s stats. I don’t think they even give out a failing grade, even if deserved. They bend over backwards to accommodate students’ issues. The hardest part is getting accepted. Weren’t all the classes held online due to Covid? Couldn’t Jazz attend classes from the comfort of her own home? What am I missing?

Jazz's issues seem so severe that she may not be able to even do online classes. Even Harvard must have some standards of performance. Mental illness is not her fault, but she needs proper treatment before she can recover. Janette says they found the right med cocktail. I'm not convinced based on behavior on the show. 

Edited by Desert Rat
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1 hour ago, gingerella said:

somewhere where she will be handled with tough love and not allowed to slack off. She has to learn to take care of herself and accept that she is not well, mentally, and needs serious therapy.

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Strongly disagree. We don't need to beat people into shape. Let her find her own way. She seems to be enjoying working (possibly because she's appreciated at work, unlike at home) - let her do what makes her feel fulfilled, which seems to be working towards making things better for others. She could get a paycheck assisting in an office, which she's doing for free right now. Let her work and/or go to Pomona, if that's what she wants. And she needs - in my opinion, I'm not her - to live away from under her family's thumb.  

Edited by JeanJean
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I wish they would stop minimizing the effect the surgeries may have had on her mental health. I know they want to downplay the impact. But it actually hurts their case to ignore the obvious. The surgeries she endured were a big deal. They obviously had an impact and should be acknowledged as such. Ignoring it won't make it go away. 

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26 minutes ago, Desert Rat said:

 

I wish they would stop minimizing the effect the surgeries may have had on her mental health. I know they want to downplay the impact. But it actually hurts their case to ignore the obvious. The surgeries she endured were a big deal. They obviously had an impact and should be acknowledged as such. Ignoring it won't make it go away. 

 

Good point. Depression post-surgery, ANY surgery, is a real thing. 

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Terrible situation all around.  It seems like all of the siblings are getting tired of Jazz.  Even Jeanette telling Greg how draining she is from Jazz.  I don't blame Jazz for her current situation.  I don't think she was ever trained on how to be responsible, and now she is 20, but needs to call mommy for help on what to buy at grocery store.  Griffen was even surprised she knew how to do laundry.  All basic basic things a 20 year old should handle.  Sander is no different.  What does his future life look like?  What will his job be?  Griff and Ari have goals and plans for the future.  Sander and Jazz, not so much.  I've never seen two people accomplish so little, yet think they've accomplished so much.  

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1 hour ago, jonesy123 said:

Terrible situation all around.  It seems like all of the siblings are getting tired of Jazz.  Even Jeanette telling Greg how draining she is from Jazz.  I don't blame Jazz for her current situation.  I don't think she was ever trained on how to be responsible, and now she is 20, but needs to call mommy for help on what to buy at grocery store.  Griffen was even surprised she knew how to do laundry.  All basic basic things a 20 year old should handle.  Sander is no different.  What does his future life look like?  What will his job be?  Griff and Ari have goals and plans for the future.  Sander and Jazz, not so much.  I've never seen two people accomplish so little, yet think they've accomplished so much.  

I agree!  And Griffen was annoying me too last night when they talked to that woman who had her program in 45 states - that probably took a lot of hard work from her, and Jazz wants to "collaborate" with her???  I'm sure she was happy to get her program on tv, but all I could think was "The nerve!!!"  As for Jeanette's showing last night, words fail me 😖

I don't remember ever seeing Ari so much as this season, and recently speculated that she needs $$ to go back to school - I guess that was confirmed last night.  A PhD program, and out of state as well!  Run like the wind, Ari!   

Edited by princelina
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Jeanette complaining this episode about how draining Jazz is, how she can't do anything for herself, how she always has to intervene to wake Jazz up, sort out her meds, etc...YET she will not give up control. To the point of getting an AirBNB because she's concerned Jazz will fail at living on her own.  I think Jeanette needs serious therapy herself, she enjoys playing the martyr. Never mind the hair extensions and plastic surgery, she should concentrate on what's really going on within herself.  She can't see it or is afraid to admit she (and Gregg) created the Jazz we are seeing now. 

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I don't know anything about Jazz’s session with the nutritionist (that Jeanette alluded to), but why didn’t Jazz have some notes or diet plan or information with her when she went food shopping? And there’s this crazy thing called the internet which she seems capable of using in every other situation. So she calls her mother, who should have told Jazz to google the guidelines for a low carb low fat diet and read it so she’d know what to buy. It’s like a co-dependent, learned helplessness dance going on. It is not a healthy relationship.

Edited by Auntie Anxiety
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55 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

So she calls her mother, who should have told Jazz to google the guidelines for a low carb low fat diet and read it so she’d know what to buy

Jazz knows how to buy healthy food. Before her bottom surgery the Dr's told her she had to lose 30 lbs and she did it. This is not her first rodeo trying to lose weight so this whole thing about not knowing what to buy at the grocery store or what to cook is BS. Unless of course Jeanette did all the buying/cooking for her before. 

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Longtime public school teacher in a red state here.  I guffawed and chortled at Griffen and Jazz and their unbelievably naive thoughts on legislation for school employees and the Be Nice campaign or whatever it was. It.Will.Never.Happen.Ever.

I'm not saying that I don't think that kind of teacher training isn't valuable or needed, just that it won't happen.

We have a 7 year old child in my hall who was assigned female at birth. Now he goes by the name James, and the Brouhaha about which bathroom he uses was unfathomable. Mandatory teacher training- ain't gonna happen. End of story-James now uses a faculty restroom. Not the perfect solution, but the best one we had.

Edited by jacksgirl
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