S9.E16: Flying By the Seat of Our Pants

[druzy]

Still hoping to reconnect with Leah, Amber sends her an emotional video message. Maci and Taylor worry that Maverick might be held back from going to kindergarten. While on vacation in Florida, Catelynn and Tyler meet up with Mackenzie and Josh.

Airs September 28, 2021

[ginger90]

Clip:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CUV72rNplg4/

[ginger90]

Another clip:

 

 

[Quilty]

Amber crying on her couch. Again.

[Mr. Miner]

Tonight: Two chucklefucks from MI meet two people from OK who both apparently are suffering from serious brain injuries. Josh speaks up and asks for a spit cup. A good time was had by all!

[woodscommaelle]

‘Ketamine Therapy’ really seemed to spark Josh’s interest. 

Amber is such a fucking asshole.  

Edited September 29, 2021 by woodscommaelle

[Inga]

Leah throwing down the hammer!! And she calls her “Amber”…damn.  I’m so glad Leah brought up the videos about Christina and the fact that nobody says anything to Amber about them. Leah is pretty amazing, i really hope she does something with her future 

[toodywoody]

Omg, please tell me what happened with Leah and Amber. 

[StatisticalOutlier]

1 hour ago, toodywoody said:

Omg, please tell me what happened with Leah and Amber. 

Yikes!  I didn't now there was going to be a test.

Amber made a video.  Or, well, she wrote a letter to Leah, and made a video of her reading it out loud, and sent the video to Leah.  She gave props to the MTV crew for helping her set up her camera (but still managed to make it so the "Purdue" logo on her sweatshirt was backwards, so I wonder if THEY know she's not actually enrolled at Purdue University). 

She sent Gary a message saying she was sending the video to Leah.  Gary didn't look at it himself before showing it to Leah.  (Why?????  It's not like Amber has a strong record with videos.)  Instead, he asked Leah if she wanted to watch it and she was ambivalent, and it was eventually decided that Gary and Leah would watch it together (with Kristina also at the table). 

I was distracted by trying to see if there was a "Global" or should I say" LABOLG," under the "Purdue," and actually don't remember what Amber said, which means it was probably the usual.  Leah didn't care.  She said she loves Kristina and Amber intentionally hurt Kristina (I'm not sure if she actually cited the video Amber made trashing Kristina, but it was definitely edited to give that impression).  Gary said Amber was trying to apologize, and Leah didn't care. 

Gary was giving examples of mistakes and forgiveness, but I was confused because he was wording it really weird, and I actually thought he was saying Leah had made a mistake.  Regardless, Leah didn't care. 

Bottom line is that Leah made it clear that she loves Kristina, and she's not entertaining the notion of forgiving Amber for taking to social media and trashing someone she loves in a video.  I hope Leah's friends take note--this gal is ride or die.

What was most striking, though, was how from some angles, Leah looks exactly like Amber. 

[Andyourlittledog2]

Amber was apologizing to Leah and owned up to some mistakes but Leah wasn't having it. I mean she really wasn't entertaining any forgiveness of Amber ever. Gary really tried to explain to Leah about how people make mistakes and you can love them anyway but Leah just said nope (in so many words).  It was sad for Leah. Amber's video was the usual pity party but with groveling and begging for Leah to forgive and accept her. Leah really is over her mom, at least at this stage in her life. When she's a teen and Kristina and Gary have to tell her 'no' sometimes I am almost positive she will pull the 'then I'll go live with my mom' thing but for now it's a hard no to Amber.

 

 

[Jeanne222]

That was a long night!  One time...Amber stood up and was verticle!  Quite a moment!

Josh has no manners.  A silk purse out of a cow's ear...no just no!

Maci have Bentley another break and focused on Maverick so that was a win for Bentley. Maybe she's been reading.  She's quite the little actress!

Cheyenne was just Cheyenne.   I do like how she talks and engages with her daughter.  Cory off to the challenge. He's getting kind of long in the tooth for that show.

Tyler still high from ketamine or whatever they call it!

 

[ginger90]

I don’t watch so I Googled. 😁 Here’s what I came up with regarding the video Amber sent:

 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/people.com/tv/teen-mom-og-amber-portwood-pleads-for-forgiveness-in-emotional-letter-to-estranged-daughter-leah/%3famp=true

 

 

[TipseyGirl]

Amber in full-on Purdue logo garb. I can't even 🙄

[toodywoody]

Thanks everyone for the Leah/Amber update. 

We all have been saying it for years and Amber is just so Amber that she can't see she's the one that all this falls on, not everyone else. At this point it doesn't matter how or when Gary and Kristina got together.  She was in prison for one, but they are married and have been for awhile, so the time to bring that up should have been put to rest a long time ago. But the thing with Amber is that she can't move past the jail phase. She's stuck in that time period and maybe if she didn't lay around all the time she could get out of her own head. Go do something instead of laying around dwelling on shit and blowing up about it 5-8 or however long ago.

[Cosmocrush]

Does Cory have another job or is being on MTV shows his entire career?  I don't really get it, he acts like he's being deployed when really he's gone for one month filming a TV reality show.  I find it hard to believe he really makes the kind of money that allows him to just hang out between calls from MTV but what do I know?   

Meanwhile, Ryder is darling!  Four is such a fun age. 

Edited September 29, 2021 by Cosmocrush

[3outta5]

Jayde and Ryder stole the show. They are *adorable*!

Question/throwback to Ryan about Kyle: "Is Josh...slow?" Or just a horrible person? I really do not like him.

Amber acts like her one "selfless" act (gel) should bring her goodwill and parenting "points" for eternity. I'm deep in teenage years with two sons and PHEW. I literally have been here for them every day and make sure they are my actual honest priority and I still get attitude sometimes. Leah is totally correct in her feelings and good for her for advocating for herself.

[politichick]

1 hour ago, Cosmocrush said:

Does Cory have another job or is being on MTV shows his entire career?  I don't really get it, he acts like he's being deployed when really he's gone for one month filming a TV reality show.  I find it hard to believe he really makes the kind of money that allows him to just hang out between calls from MTV but what do I know?   

Meanwhile, Ryder is darling!  Four is such a fun age. 

He acts like he's being deployed. That is too funny. Good question, though!

Josh is seriously gross. I mean, spit cup, dude? I wonder how often that request comes up in their part of Florida. Interesting how Tyler said Josh and MacKenzie seem disconnected. She needs to cut her losses.

[Evie]

Amber's apology was just more of the same. If Amber had ever prioritized Leah and acted like a mother, Leah wouldn't be done with her. She still never leaves her couch.

Jayde is a little firecracker, but why do Maci's boys have mullets in the making. 

Cheyenne's boring but Ryder is adorable.

 

[Marisagf]

I saw the scene with Leah watching Amber's video and then I read the transcript from the People magazine link.  It's just heartbreaking,

Leah is so smart and can advocate for herself.  Amber is such a POS.  She is the one losing out on her bright and beautiful daughter.  

[StatisticalOutlier]

6 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Cheyenne was just Cheyenne.   I do like how she talks and engages with her daughter.

I still laugh when I think about a scene in the past where they were out somewhere and Ryder was dipping a french fry in milk, maybe, and Cheyenne was like, "Don't do that" and it was too late and without pausing she added, genuinely, "Is it good?"

Ryder's little smile is beyond cute.

2 hours ago, 3outta5 said:

Jayde and Ryder stole the show. They are *adorable*!

It was faint and I wouldn't have caught it without the captions, but when Vaeda dropped something down the heating vent and they were telling her she has to be careful or whatever, apparently Nova said, "You'll learn, kid.  You'll learn."  Snort.

2 hours ago, 3outta5 said:

Amber acts like her one "selfless" act (gel) should bring her goodwill and parenting "points" for eternity.

Not to mention that her definition of "selfless" is a little...off.  She went to gel because she didn't think she could fulfill the requirements of being on probation, and would end up in gel anyway.  That seems more like the path of least resistance to me.  Being selfless would mean doing what it takes to stay out of jail so you don't abandon your daughter, even for a finite period of time.

And maybe she's right--she would have ended up in gel anyway.  But don't make it sound like a sacrifice you made for Leah, and especially don't say the sacrifice was in order to keep yourself alive for Leah, because all keeping herself alive has done is give her the opportunity to post videos trashing Kristina, someone who has proven she loves Leah.

Also, that People article had what Gary said about forgiving that confused me: 

Quote

"You can make bad decisions and still care about somebody," said Gary. "Your mom has made bad decisions. I've made bad decisions. You can still love and care about somebody even though you made bad decisions."

 

[Cinnabon]

4 hours ago, Cosmocrush said:

Does Cory have another job or is being on MTV shows his entire career?  I don't really get it, he acts like he's being deployed when really he's gone for one month filming a TV reality show.  I find it hard to believe he really makes the kind of money that allows him to just hang out between calls from MTV but what do I know?   

Meanwhile, Ryder is darling!  Four is such a fun age. 

He’s still on it but has recently said on SM that he is not allowed to go to the reunion because he refuses to get vaccinated. And he has a high risk child. Just sickening.

[Cosmocrush]

Good grief Amber get a grip.  Publicly sobbing to your 12/13 year old how much you love her isn't going to do anything but make her uncomfortable.  Sobbing how how sorry you are (BUT NOT SAYING FOR WHAT) isn't going to help either. 

Amber really fucked up putting out those videos trashing Leah's parents.  I wish someone would make her understand that Leah isn't as upset over what Amber did a decade ago as much as what Amber did a month ago.  There is nothing to gain by trashing a kid's parent - as Gary and Kristina obviously know.  Ironic that Amber continues to accuse Kristina and Gary of turning Leah against her while she's actively and very publicly doing all that herself.

2 hours ago, Evie said:

She [Amber] still never leaves her couch.

Heh.  She was preparing for 2020 all this time.  While many of us took to our sofas for a year Amber had already mastered how to live and work from her couch. 

[Cinnabon]

21 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I still laugh when I think about a scene in the past where they were out somewhere and Ryder was dipping a french fry in milk, maybe, and Cheyenne was like, "Don't do that" and it was too late and without pausing she added, genuinely, "Is it good?"

Ryder's little smile is beyond cute.

It was faint and I wouldn't have caught it without the captions, but when Vaeda dropped something down the heating vent and they were telling her she has to be careful or whatever, apparently Nova said, "You'll learn, kid.  You'll learn."  Snort.

Not to mention that her definition of "selfless" is a little...off.  She went to gel because she didn't think she could fulfill the requirements of being on probation, and would end up in gel anyway.  That seems more like the path of least resistance to me.  Being selfless would mean doing what it takes to stay out of jail so you don't abandon your daughter, even for a finite period of time.

And maybe she's right--she would have ended up in gel anyway.  But don't make it sound like a sacrifice you made for Leah, and especially don't say the sacrifice was in order to keep yourself alive for Leah, because all keeping herself alive has done is give her the opportunity to post videos trashing Kristina, someone who has proven she loves Leah.

Also, that People article had what Gary said about forgiving that confused me: 

 

Gary is not that articulate but I get his point. I do wonder how long it will be before Leah realizes that part of Gary’s acceptance of Amber has to do with his need to make nice with her so he can continue profiting from this show. 

[BrownBear2012]

3 hours ago, 3outta5 said:

Jayde and Ryder stole the show. They are *adorable*!

Question/throwback to Ryan about Kyle: "Is Josh...slow?" Or just a horrible person? I really do not like him.

Amber acts like her one "selfless" act (gel) should bring her goodwill and parenting "points" for eternity. I'm deep in teenage years with two sons and PHEW. I literally have been here for them every day and make sure they are my actual honest priority and I still get attitude sometimes. Leah is totally correct in her feelings and good for her for advocating for herself.

Personally, I think Josh has some brain damage from too many concussions when he used to ride broncos at rodeos. 

6 minutes ago, Cinnabon said:

He’s still on it but has recently said on SM that he is not allowed to go to the reunion because he refuses to get vaccinated. And he has a high risk child. Just sickening.

OMG! This guy is an idiot! He shouldn't be allowed on this show or The Challenge until he's vaccinated. I can't believe he isn't vaxxed with Ryder having a immune compromised condition. How selfish and stupid. 

[Tatum]

4 hours ago, Cosmocrush said:

Does Cory have another job or is being on MTV shows his entire career?  I don't really get it, he acts like he's being deployed when really he's gone for one month filming a TV reality show.  I find it hard to believe he really makes the kind of money that allows him to just hang out between calls from MTV but what do I know?  

The vets have claimed they get an appearance fee for these challenges...somewhere between $30,000 and $60,000, prior to any show winnings. I am somewhat skeptical of that. The production company is notoriously cheap and The Challenge has never led the way in ratings, but I guess it could be true and Cory has been doing this long enough and brings enough drama that he probably would be one of the ones who got paid. In that case, it's possible he makes enough to get by without getting a traditional job.

[StatisticalOutlier]

2 hours ago, Cosmocrush said:

Amber really fucked up putting out those videos trashing Leah's parents.  I wish someone would make her understand that Leah isn't as upset over what Amber did a decade ago as much as what Amber did a month ago. 

But see, not even Amber can figure out how to claim that putting out a video for public consumption trashing Kristina was a selfless act.

As for someone making Amber understand what Leah's upset about, I nominate Leah:

Quote

"What I will say is, your mom loves you," said Gary.

"But I love Kristina, and she tried to hurt somebody I love," Leah responded. "I can't love somebody who tried to hurt somebody I love."

I suppose in a perfect world, Leah would communicate that to her directly, but I think it would be hard for Amber to complain about Leah relying on a public video to convey the information.  "See mom?  I did learn something from you."

Edited September 29, 2021 by StatisticalOutlier

[Cosmocrush]

8 minutes ago, Cinnabon said:

Gary is not that articulate but I get his point. I do wonder how long it will be before Leah realizes that part of Gary’s acceptance of Amber has to do with his need to make nice with her so he can continue profiting from this show. 

OR maybe he realizes trashing Leah's mother doesn't really help Leah and really says more about him then Amber.   I realize I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt here but even if he's being nice for the dollars, the end result is the same.  And it's not like he's forcing a relationship - I see it more as leaving the door open. 

[Tatum]

8 minutes ago, Cosmocrush said:

OR maybe he realizes trashing Leah's mother doesn't really help Leah and really says more about him then Amber.   I realize I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt here but even if he's being nice for the dollars, the end result is the same.  And it's not like he's forcing a relationship - I see it more as leaving the door open. 

I'm not as inclined to give him the benefit of the doubt, but agree he is saying the right things, and that is what matters.

[Cinnabon]

54 minutes ago, Cosmocrush said:

OR maybe he realizes trashing Leah's mother doesn't really help Leah and really says more about him then Amber.   I realize I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt here but even if he's being nice for the dollars, the end result is the same.  And it's not like he's forcing a relationship - I see it more as leaving the door open. 

I just think someday Leah will probably resent Gary (and Amber) for continuing to exploit her childhood and now preteen years for money instead of getting jobs to support her. Maybe she won’t, but I suspect she will. She is obviously aware that Kristina’s other child’s father does not allow him (?) to be filmed or even exploited on social media for strangers.

Edited September 29, 2021 by Cinnabon

[Chris Knight]

I caught a typo ! The caption for MacKenzie's daughter and son playing together said "McK's sons" when it was clearly Broncs and the daughter. Yay, me !

I think Gary and Kristina are taking the high road yet again. But Leah is not 2. She's 13 and her reasoning that Amber has made multiple disparaging videos about Kristina, makes sense to me. When people show you who they really are, let them. Amber's true colors have been posted on social media apparently a few times. I wouldn't forgive her either.

If Josh and M have only lived in FL 6 months, starting in Oct,  that means the brunch was in March. Cate is super heavy for not being due til Sept. She needs to watch her weight.

Edited September 29, 2021 by Chris Knight

[BrownBear2012]

I’m glad that Broncs is seeing a therapist but I think he should be tested for autism. One of the early signs of being on the Spectrum are delayed speech, inappropriate behaviors such as biting people and acting out like hitting his teacher on the butt. I’m so pissed at how Mackenzie laughs about it and thinks it’s funny. And how much abuse can his teacher take? Shouldn’t he be asked to leave the school at this point? These preschool teachers don’t get paid enough to have to put up with this kind of abuse. This kid needs testing and then an appropriate school that is dedicated to helping children like this. Otherwise he’ll never cut it in public school past kindergarten. I’m assuming he’s in preschool right now.

Mackenzie and Josh need to focus on getting this kid the treatment and therapy he needs to function in society or else they will have a lifetime of trouble with this child.

 

 

[ellenr33]

Wow I can't believe the strength that Leah is showing more and more. Six seasons ago I would have guessed that she would be the person she is becoming. I hope to god that Gary doesn't make her pursue a relationship with Amber! 

[SilverLake0315]

I’m really impressed with Leah. She was very clear on her feelings and also able to explain WHY she feels the way she does.

Amber doesn’t stand a chance with her unless she (Amber) somehow manages to get out of her own damn way. 

[jacksgirl]

If Ambie were smart, she'd tell Leah that she was wrong to say hateful things about Kristina. She should say she is jealous of the close relationship Leah has with Kristina and lashed out. Then she should apologize to Kristina and Gary face-to-face and accept that her role as Leah's mom is over (at least for now). If genuine,  that might make some headway with Leah. Leah is a bright kid and has Ambie's number. It's been lather, rinse, repeat for years now. Leah is done with it. And agree with the sentiment that it's time to get these kids off tv.

[jacksgirl]

More to say and I still don't watch, just read comments. Tyler, I believe that therapy helps many people. It may help you. What may help you more is to get a job. Working will keep your days routine. Working will give you and Caitlynn needed time apart. Working will give you a sense of accomplishment and boost your self-esteem. Working will provide your children with a good role model of what adults do. To not be sexist, Caitlynn would also benefit from work when the baby is older. I think you would be amazed at how good you can feel if you have a job. No, filming this shi***** doesn't count.

[jacksgirl]

8 hours ago, Cinnabon said:

Gary is not that articulate but I get his point. I do wonder how long it will be before Leah realizes that part of Gary’s acceptance of Amber has to do with his need to make nice with her so he can continue profiting from this show. 

Ok. I ff'ed and watched the end. I think Gary is pretty articulate in this conversation. He talks to Leah in a very age appropriate way. Also agree that some discussions need to be held with Leah (and Bintley) about why they are continue to film. Leah's peer group may think it's cool, but time to pull the plug.

Edited September 30, 2021 by jacksgirl

[jacksgirl]

7 hours ago, Tatum said:

I'm not as inclined to give him the benefit of the doubt, but agree he is saying the right things, and that is what matters.

Gary has done well since his Belden Lineman days. He has Leah and Emilee. He has what looks like a great partnership with Kristina. He has a working farm that he maintains.  Kristina has changed career paths, but she is hardworking and a good mom/stepmother. I don't think that's why he still supports Leah having a relationship with Ambie, but why wouldn't he? He holds every card. I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. And if it's just lip service, I wouldn't blame him as awful as Couch Tater Ambie has been.

[Cosmocrush]

22 minutes ago, jacksgirl said:

Couch Tater Ambie

Bwahahaha!  I love it!

[BrownBear2012]

4 hours ago, jacksgirl said:

More to say and I still don't watch, just read comments. Tyler, I believe that therapy helps many people. It may help you. What may help you more is to get a job. Working will keep your days routine. Working will give you and Caitlynn needed time apart. Working will give you a sense of accomplishment and boost your self-esteem. Working will provide your children with a good role model of what adults do. To not be sexist, Caitlynn would also benefit from work when the baby is older. I think you would be amazed at how good you can feel if you have a job. No, filming this shi***** doesn't count.

Amen to everything you said! I have been saying for a number of years that all of these TM’s and their spouses and significant others are living a life that is unsustainable after this show ends. They’re pushing thirty and most of them have never held a job. I can’t imagine how bored and unfulfilled Tyler must feel that he never lived up to the career goals he set for himself when he was 18…going to college and getting a degree in counseling. He got caught up in the celebrity and the Instagram/Facebook world that became their “work”…and let go of a career path that would have given him pride, a sense of accomplishment and a secure job with benefits. It was easier to go online and post pics of his family and talk to fans on IG/Facebook. And so it goes for all the other TM’s that are not looking at the long game…they are making money and spending it on typical teen things…cars, tattoos, designer bags, electronics, resort vacations, etc. I’m guessing very little of it is invested or put aside in a savings account for their kids. MTV enables this and rest assured when the ratings drop and they decide to finally end the show, MTV will cut and run. 

[Mr. Miner]

11 hours ago, jacksgirl said:

If Ambie were smart, she'd tell Leah that she was wrong to say hateful things about Kristina. She should say she is jealous of the close relationship Leah has with Kristina and lashed out. Then she should apologize to Kristina and Gary face-to-face and accept that her role as Leah's mom is over (at least for now). If genuine,  that might make some headway with Leah. Leah is a bright kid and has Ambie's number. It's been lather, rinse, repeat for years now. Leah is done with it. And agree with the sentiment that it's time to get these kids off tv.

Since Amber did not make that kind of an apology, this is a great opportunity for Leah to just write her off for good.

As soon as the MTV money train ends, Amber will just go on disability for her many mental illnesses. Some of the others might too.

[Cinnabon]

12 hours ago, jacksgirl said:

Gary has done well since his Belden Lineman days. He has Leah and Emilee. He has what looks like a great partnership with Kristina. He has a working farm that he maintains.  Kristina has changed career paths, but she is hardworking and a good mom/stepmother. I don't think that's why he still supports Leah having a relationship with Ambie, but why wouldn't he? He holds every card. I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. And if it's just lip service, I wouldn't blame him as awful as Couch Tater Ambie has been.

Gary said the right thing, and Leah’s reaction was mature and great. But she is 13 now, and her peers are old enough to watch this show. Who would want their personal issues all over national tv?

[Tatum]

1 hour ago, Cinnabon said:

Gary said the right thing, and Leah’s reaction was mature and great. But she is 13 now, and her peers are old enough to watch this show. Who would want their personal issues all over national tv?

Agree. Gary is one of the most mature, long term thinking parents on this show, but that's a low freaking bar.

[Evie]

11 hours ago, BrownBear2012 said:

Amen to everything you said! I have been saying for a number of years that all of these TM’s and their spouses and significant others are living a life that is unsustainable after this show ends. They’re pushing thirty and most of them have never held a job. I can’t imagine how bored and unfulfilled Tyler must feel that he never lived up to the career goals he set for himself when he was 18…going to college and getting a degree in counseling. He got caught up in the celebrity and the Instagram/Facebook world that became their “work”…and let go of a career path that would have given him pride, a sense of accomplishment and a secure job with benefits. It was easier to go online and post pics of his family and talk to fans on IG/Facebook. And so it goes for all the other TM’s that are not looking at the long game…they are making money and spending it on typical teen things…cars, tattoos, designer bags, electronics, resort vacations, etc. I’m guessing very little of it is invested or put aside in a savings account for their kids. MTV enables this and rest assured when the ratings drop and they decide to finally end the show, MTV will cut and run. 

Tyler and Cate owe nearly $900,000 in back taxes. They are most definitely screwed when the show ends. Amber too. 

[BrownBear2012]

1 hour ago, Evie said:

Tyler and Cate owe nearly $900,000 in back taxes. They are most definitely screwed when the show ends. Amber too. 

I'm sure neither of these TMs have accountants to handle their mess...sad.

[iwantcookies]

Couch tater Ambien 😂🥰👋

[edie3]

5 hours ago, Tatum said:

Gary is one of the most mature, long term thinking parents on this show,

Did you ever think you would say this?

[Tatum]

14 hours ago, edie3 said:

Did you ever think you would say this?

Given the people on this show...it truly isn't a ringing endorsement :).

 

Really though, I never thought Gary was that bad. Other than him fucking a 17 year old when he was 20-21 (legal in his state, but squicky in my opinion), he was one of the very few dads in the entire series who seemed to love the mother of his child and also welcomed fatherhood. I suppose he has the advantage of being in a serious relationship with the mother at the time and also being out of high school. Even in the very early days of the series, he was one of the best fathers on the show (now, again, this is relative).

[IDreamofJoaquin]

The whole double date thing was very odd to me.  "I think MacKenzie lives here".   Did it take her a year to figure that out?

[JocelynCavanaugh]

On 9/29/2021 at 12:30 AM, Andyourlittledog2 said:

Amber was apologizing to Leah and owned up to some mistakes but Leah wasn't having it. I mean she really wasn't entertaining any forgiveness of Amber ever. Gary really tried to explain to Leah about how people make mistakes and you can love them anyway but Leah just said nope (in so many words).  It was sad for Leah. Amber's video was the usual pity party but with groveling and begging for Leah to forgive and accept her. 

On 9/29/2021 at 12:56 PM, Cosmocrush said:

Good grief Amber get a grip.  Publicly sobbing to your 12/13 year old how much you love her isn't going to do anything but make her uncomfortable.  Sobbing how how sorry you are (BUT NOT SAYING FOR WHAT) isn't going to help either. 

Amber really fucked up putting out those videos trashing Leah's parents.  I wish someone would make her understand that Leah isn't as upset over what Amber did a decade ago as much as what Amber did a month ago.  There is nothing to gain by trashing a kid's parent - as Gary and Kristina obviously know.  Ironic that Amber continues to accuse Kristina and Gary of turning Leah against her while she's actively and very publicly doing all that herself.

On 9/29/2021 at 1:17 PM, Cosmocrush said:

OR maybe he realizes trashing Leah's mother doesn't really help Leah and really says more about him then Amber.   I realize I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt here but even if he's being nice for the dollars, the end result is the same.  And it's not like he's forcing a relationship - I see it more as leaving the door open. 

Agree with all this so much!

Leah seems like a relatively bright and mature kid for her age. Over the past few seasons, I've gotten the feeling she may be leaning into the precocious thing a bit because she gets a lot of praise for it on social media and probably in real life, too. She's definitely aware of the cameras and shaping her responses accordingly (I'm sure at 11-13 I would've done the same in that situation). It's understandable why she's over Amber at this point and doesn't want to keep entertaining the cycle of disappearing and reappearing with over-the-top affection and apologies.

That said, I think Gary is rather wisely looking at the long game here. He and Kristina annoy me at times, but they've done an admirable job of holding back on what they say publicly about Amber and not trying to turn Leah against her. No doubt they have done the vast majority of raising Leah, and Kristina is her real mom for all practical purposes, but it wouldn't help Leah at all to encourage her to avoid and look down on Amber. When she's older, she might resent them adding to that negativity and wonder if they influenced or alienated her. It benefits all three of them if all her memories are of them encouraging her to be successful and letting her choose how to feel about Amber.

There's also a decent chance that someday Leah will want to have some kind of relationship with Amber. Gary is right to encourage her to leave that door open. It would be a lot to expect that level of maturity and forgiveness from an adolescent, but he's establishing the framework for her to consider it in the future. Regardless of how Amber conducts herself or whether she ever gets it together, Leah is better off living with less resentment and not being forced to take sides between her bio parents.

On 9/29/2021 at 10:05 AM, politichick said:

Josh is seriously gross. I mean, spit cup, dude? I wonder how often that request comes up in their part of Florida. Interesting how Tyler said Josh and MacKenzie seem disconnected. She needs to cut her losses.

On 9/29/2021 at 3:48 PM, BrownBear2012 said:

Mackenzie and Josh need to focus on getting this kid the treatment and therapy he needs to function in society or else they will have a lifetime of trouble with this child.

It cracks me up when Tyler has a moment of clarity like that. He is occasionally capable of some good insights. He is also capable of yelling on top of everyone, openly expressing disgust at his own children's gender reveals, and getting... lots... of Battoos (Batman tattoos but they deserve a portmanteau). But he has his moments.

Mackenzie is the worst and Josh is The Actual Worst. I understand some kids are difficult, even when parents do their best, and I can deal with that (as long as they don't bring them on airplanes). But when parents see their kid causing havoc and being hateful to others, hear him shrieking at frequencies that cause actual physical distress to other humans, and are told almost daily that the kid is physically assaulting his teacher, and they JUST SHRUG IT OFF? Fuck them.

"I don't know how to discipline! I can't stick with it!" Well suck it up, babydoll. Nobody likes your child and he's in for a lifetime of failure, confusion, and isolation because nobody -- particularly, his primary caregivers (that's you, hon) -- is helping him learn how to interact, express himself, and treat people and things with respect.

"That's just how boys are. He'll be fine. Nobody tells me how to parent my kid." OK, great strategy, sounds a lot like the approach taken by the "Affluenza" parents a few years back. I recall that ending smoothly. Just for fun, a thought exercise: is that just how boys are? Or is it just how maladaptive, antisocial future inmates are?

PS: I grew up in a home where spit cups were a thing. It's probably better than smoking in a lot of ways, but let's just say there are certain sensory experiences that you never recover from... and you learn to never trust an open Dr Pepper can.

[StatisticalOutlier]

20 hours ago, JocelynCavanaugh said:

PS: I grew up in a home where spit cups were a thing. It's probably better than smoking in a lot of ways, but let's just say there are certain sensory experiences that you never recover from... and you learn to never trust an open Dr Pepper can.

Oh, god, yes.  Incredibly rank, with a touch of mint.