S02.E05: Colin’s Promotion

[formerlyfreedom]

Colin Robinson gets promoted at work, and his new power threatens the balance of power in the vampire house.

Airing Wednesday, May 6, 2020.

 

[CletusMusashi]

There seems to be a big "alternate selves" theme going on this season.  Meeting their own ghosts, looking at past events through the lens of one's former human morality, and even creating literal alternate selves. Actually, not just this season. This whole series. If you don't believe me, ask Jebsk.

Nadja just embraces it. She doesn't give a damn about whether or not suddenly judging Nandor to be a murderer makes her a hypocrite, she feels what she feels. That's why she can be best friends with her own ghost. It didn't even take much prodding for the old lady next door to get her to admit everything, because compartmentalizing periods of her life is just not her style.

Nandor is so old and settled down that he remembers himself as an adult human the same way that I remember being, say, 10 years old. So he remembers his horse fondly, but his actual personality from back then is removed enough from today's that it's hard to guilt trip him much over it.

Laszlo settled his biggest personal identity crisis this season by doing one of the things he does best: pleasuring himself. This week he didn't particularly have a bat in the race so he simply did whatever it took to make Nadja happy.

Gizmo had already dabbled in this theme last season when he met the other familiars. More recently, he's been dealing with it by interacting with the other slayers. Hell, even the next door neighbor rediscovering himself through amnesia fits into the identity theme.

So what did we learn from Colin Robinson and his alts? We learned that he's okay with himself or himselves, but does still require other distinct people for self-actualization. He was actually more upset about his roomies not caring about the promotion than he was about the alts dying.

Edited May 7, 2020 by CletusMusashi

[voiceover]

I have no problem declaring this, the ColinCentric ep, my favorite of the series thus far.

I'm pretty sure I laughed all the way through -- thank heaven for the three-peat so I could catch what I giggled through the first time:

In a squeaker, it was Nadja again with Line of the Night:  "[points to Nandor's image in the painting] Then what the fuck is Persian Frank Zappa doing on that horse?"

A thoroughly drained Nandor is second with: "Come here and put your neck in my mouth..."

HMs:

Nadja (to Nandor)"My childhood tears watered the garden of your legend!!" (Gah! That line fell out of a Russian novel!!)

And The Man himself, Colin Robinson, was brilliant! by turns vulnerable, hilarious, and...mean.

Plus: "By the way: I can fly now."  As Nadja would say: Bloody genius.

Edited May 7, 2020 by voiceover
I keep remembering my other faves

[LittleIggy]

When I think this show can’t get any more hilarious, it does! I about busted a gut laughing. Colin’s hair growing instantly...the enormous head...the C-Man...😆😂🤣

Edited May 7, 2020 by LittleIggy

[LittleIggy]

So Nandor is the senior vampire. He’s at least two hundred years older than Nadja who is the next senior vampire.

Nandor told Guillermo to “save himself”! Aw! 
Wonder how the three recovered so quickly? 

Edited May 7, 2020 by LittleIggy

[Vermicious Knid]

He came with the house! That makes so much more sense than actually being friends and inviting him to move in. I wonder why he goes with draining through boredom when he can apparently feed off anger or strong emotions as well. So funny that he just embeds himself in a company like a cuckoo and no one ever seems to question it.

I think the writers are having a competition on who can come up with the most ridiculous story for Nadja to relate from her history. And we got direct interaction with the camera crew, Colin drains them too and then "Camera 2, come over here and put your neck in my mouth."

Very psyched for Mark Hamill next week.

[gatopretoNYC]

Another fantastic episode.

[teddysmom]

Persian Frank Zappa. Omg

Camera 2 put your neck in my mouth

Last 2 episodes have been incredible. 

When Nadja goes downstairs to  talk to C Man and his head is 3 times bigger

.

Edited May 7, 2020 by teddysmom

[tennisgurl]

Colin Robinson came with the house! Not surprising, I feel like Colin Robinson comes with every office ever. 

Colin Robinson has become so powerful, that he has turned into Megamind! The three Colin's draining each other was amazing, almost as great as him flying by doing the doggy paddle. Aww, Laszlo actually thought Colin Robinson's conversation about 19th century naval battles was interesting. "I didn't tell you because if I did you would stop."  

[teddysmom]

Megamind!!

Or Gary Oldman's version of Dracula with the big forehead 

Kramer did the same thing on Seinfeld.  And he didn't know what company did either 

Edited May 7, 2020 by teddysmom

[sistermagpie]

I laughed embarrassingly loud at this episode, and some of my favorite moments weren't even technically funniest. For instance, Guillermo's reaction shot to the camera when Colin levitated the picture and, along with that, Nandor's amazing line reading of, "How is he doing that?"

And Nadja's "We didn't get the name. But I have it now." (And her imitation of Nandor's announcement.)

Oh, and Guillermo trying to run interference for the fight: "What I'm hearing Nandor saying..."

13 hours ago, CletusMusashi said:

There seems to be a big "alternate selves" theme going on this season.  Meeting their own ghosts, looking at past events through the lens of one's former human morality, and even creating literal alternate selves. Actually, not just this season. This whole series. If you don't believe me, ask Jebsk.

I had never thought of it this way but wow, it really is right on. I love how it's so central to Nandor that his human life is so disconnected from him. That person in the portrait might as well be Persian Frank Zappa.

Runner up line: We have to eat Guillermo.

[iMonrey]

I was worried, for just a minute or two, that a Colin-centric episode might not be very good. Boy, was I wrong. They are just firing on all cylinders this season, aren't they? 

Quote

In a squeaker, it was Nadja again with Line of the Night:  "[points to Nandor's image in the painting] Then what the fuck is Persian Frank Zappa doing on that horse?"

I don't know what I love more, the fact that Nadja knows who Frank Zappa is or the realization that Nandor really does look like a Persian Frank Zappa!

Hard to believe Colin is potentially the scariest of the four vampires. And I love that he didn't even know what his company did. Designing playgrounds, or landmines. Something like that.

[libgirl2]

40 minutes ago, iMonrey said:

Hard to believe Colin is potentially the scariest of the four vampires. And I love that he didn't even know what his company did. Designing playgrounds, or landmines. Something like that.

I know. I wasn't even sure he had any real super scary power as his seemed so benign. 

[AuntiePam]

6 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

Colin Robinson has become so powerful, that he has turned into Megamind! The three Colin's draining each other was amazing, almost as great as him flying by doing the doggy paddle. Aww, Laszlo actually thought Colin Robinson's conversation about 19th century naval battles was interesting. "I didn't tell you because if I did you would stop."  

That's exactly how I fly in my dreams.  It's fun for awhile, until I need to escape from whatever's chasing me, or keep from falling into water.

I've worked in an office.  Colin's curses -- "Working hard or hardly working?" -- really do drain energy.  I've heard all those statements, sometimes in the same day.  From the same person.

 

[tennisgurl]

8 minutes ago, AuntiePam said:

I've heard all those statements, sometimes in the same day.  From the same person.

You haven't noticed their eyes glowing, or their heads growing larger have you?

[sistermagpie]

4 hours ago, iMonrey said:

Hard to believe Colin is potentially the scariest of the four vampires. And I love that he didn't even know what his company did. Designing playgrounds, or landmines. Something like that.

Seriously, the show is so damn good at finding just the right spin on each character. Colin really is the perfect replacement for Peter, who lived in the basement of the house in NZ in the movie.

[TexasGal]

2 hours ago, AuntiePam said:

 

I've worked in an office.  Colin's curses -- "Working hard or hardly working?" -- really do drain energy.  I've heard all those statements, sometimes in the same day.  From the same person.

 

Omg, the conference call stuff?  “Who was that beep?” “Staten Island office here.” “How was everyone’s weekend?”

So real.  So deadly.

[gatopretoNYC]

2 hours ago, AuntiePam said:

I've worked in an office.  Colin's curses -- "Working hard or hardly working?" -- really do drain energy.  I've heard all those statements, sometimes in the same day.  From the same person.

Aw, somebody's got a case of the Mondays! 

[kieyra]

“Persian Frank Zappa”. I am dead.

[Mr. Sparkle]

20 hours ago, voiceover said:

In a squeaker, it was Nadja again with Line of the Night:  "[points to Nandor's image in the painting] Then what the fuck is Persian Frank Zappa doing on that horse?"

I respectfully disagree. There was no contest that this was the funniest line of the night, if not the whole series. 🤪

20 hours ago, voiceover said:

I have no problem declaring this, the ColinCentric ep, my favorite of the series thus far.

It's definitely my favorite of this season, hands down. Probably 2nd for me only to the Vampire Council of last season. It's funny, because Colin is not my favorite character. I usually find him as annoying as he is written. But this was a great episode. 

[TexasGal]

You guys, that was an improv!!

 

 

[MisterGlass]

That is brilliant improv.  He really does look like Frank Zappa.  We need a Frank Zappa song at the end of a Nandor episode in the future.

Another line that really made me laugh was when Joanne the assistant said "Mr. Robinson?" and Colin corrected her "Colin Robinson."  It must always be the full name.

I did not expect Colin to actually be scary!  From the moment he crushed that trashcan it just got nuttier and nuttier.  And then it turns out he's his own worst enemy!

It was surprisingly sweet that Colin does like the other vamps, and made a portrait of them all.  And apparently he really has been listening to them since he figured out the bombshell of Nandor's painting!  And he knew how to hurt them with it when the moment came.

I wonder what former house owners Colin bored to death before the vamps arrived.

[peridot]

Besides the unexpected powers of Colin, I liked seeing the paintings that the other three had.  I laughed when Nadja mentioned she was in Guernica, of course she was!  I also loved when she chastised Nandor for looking at her "floral" painting, and he mentioned that it was shoved in his face.

They've been dragging out Guillermo's confession of vampire hunting, I hope the others find out about it this season!

It was kind of sweet/sad that Colin had a drawing and a picture of the 4, and keeps bringing the picture to work.

[One Imaginary Girl]

1 hour ago, MisterGlass said:

Another line that really made me laugh was when Joanne the assistant said "Mr. Robinson?" and Colin corrected her "Colin Robinson."  It must always be the full name.

I like that even the episode description on cable mentions Colin Robinson, not just Colin.

[Zanne]

5 hours ago, AuntiePam said:

That's exactly how I fly in my dreams.  It's fun for awhile, until I need to escape from whatever's chasing me, or keep from falling into water.

 

I fly like that in my dreams, too! It's exhausting and I never seem to get anywhere.

[voiceover]

13 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

almost as great as [Colin] flying by doing the doggy paddle. 

I believe it was the breast stroke🤣

[LittleIggy]

14 hours ago, teddysmom said:

Megamind!!

Or Gary Oldman's version of Dracula with the big forehead 

Kramer did the same thing on Seinfeld.  And he didn't know what company did either 

Gary Oldman’s Dracula’s hair was big in the scenes where he was old. I love that movie’s visuals - art direction, costumes, etc. Absolutely stunning.

7 hours ago, AuntiePam said:

That's exactly how I fly in my dreams.  It's fun for awhile, until I need to escape from whatever's chasing me, or keep from falling into water.

I've worked in an office.  Colin's curses -- "Working hard or hardly working?" -- really do drain energy.  I've heard all those statements, sometimes in the same day.  From the same person.

 

He even killed the plants! 😂

[Cherpumple]

My favorite detail in the paintings was seeing Laszlo wearing his cursed witch hat in the one that Colin Robinson made. I love that hat!

[HotRats2112]

On 5/6/2020 at 11:44 PM, voiceover said:

In a squeaker, it was Nadja again with Line of the Night:  "[points to Nandor's image in the painting] Then what the fuck is Persian Frank Zappa doing on that horse?"

 

Agreed.  Of course, as a Zappa fanatic, I would call any reference to Frank the best line. 

[HotRats2112]

On 5/7/2020 at 8:39 PM, TexasGal said:

You guys, that was an improv!!

 

 

I didn't think I could love Natasia more, but...  well, here we are. 

Edited May 12, 2020 by HotRats2112

[teddysmom]

Same! The woman is a bloody genius!  

[sistermagpie]

I also feel we need a shout out to Colin Robinson not, in Nadja's view, being the wild card, but the card at the top of the deck with the instructions on it that you throw out.

[seacliffsal]

This was amazing.  I had been wondering about Colin Robinson's powers and we saw the full circle.  Hilarious lines throughout the episode.  And, like some of you already pointed out-he uses the same powers that all of the energy vampires in our lives use-especially at work.  Oh, how it bothers me to answer the same "fun" questions over and over.  But, now I totally understand it-they're trying to drain my energy.  Also loved that Colin Robinson just showed up at a new office and worked his way in.  Oh, also loved the aging of the others as Colin's powers grew.

[iMonrey]

Quote

It was kind of sweet/sad that Colin had a drawing and a picture of the 4, and keeps bringing the picture to work.

The picture on his desk was a photo though. It was probably his reference for the "self portrait" he made with Texas Instruments Paint Pro.

I always get a kick out of the way Nandor pronounces things. When Colin Robinson bored himself to death Nandor said "So say-d." And also "Camera 2, come over here and put your neck in my m-ow-th." It probably has as much to do with the fake teeth as it does with Kayvan Novak trying to affect a foreign accent, but it's hilarious all the same.

[HotRats2112]

1 hour ago, seacliffsal said:

 Oh, also loved the aging of the others as Colin's powers grew.

I took that to be because they hadn't fed. Like in Dracula with Gary Oldman.  When Neo first gets there he's extremely old and then he feeds and starts to look younger. 

[Cherpumple]

1 hour ago, seacliffsal said:

This was amazing.  I had been wondering about Colin Robinson's powers and we saw the full circle.

Do we know if he has any weaknesses? He can drain other vampires and is not affected by sunlight, but is he affected by things like crucifixes, holy water, or garlic? He met his match when confronted by the emotional vampire last season, but I can't think of anything that actually repels him.

[Lantern7]

Not much to say that hasn’t been said already.

It wasn’t that the line “Put your neck in my mouth” was funny. It was also because Nandor was asking politely. I know he was too drained to actually demand Guillermo to do that, but it was pretty funny.

A powerful Colin Robinson is more dangerous that all three “normal” vampires put together. From the teaser, I thought the hair growth would be gradual. Nope . . . instant hair. And he produced clones! Real ones!! And it’s hysterical that they bored each other to death. I’m surprised the other vamps didn’t feast on the two dead Colins Robinson.

4 hours ago, Cherpumple said:

Do we know if he has any weaknesses? He can drain other vampires and is not affected by sunlight, but is he affected by things like crucifixes, holy water, or garlic? He met his match when confronted by the emotional vampire last season, but I can't think of anything that actually repels him.

Off the top of my head: motivational speakers. People with energy that can’t be knocked out by a Colin quip. Either the optimism repels him, or he feeds on an endless buffet of one until he explodes.

[Gobi]

I wonder if the Colin Robinson clones will resurface..........

[Bruinsfan]

Colin wasn't bothered by going into the church last season, so whatever energy vampires are they apparently aren't technically unholy. I guess if he were isolated with no way to annoy or bore people he could starve to death—that appears to be what killed his doppelgangers.

[Orbert]

Wow, this show keeps getting weirder... and funnier!

[Catfi9ht]

15 hours ago, iMonrey said:

I always get a kick out of the way Nandor pronounces things

My favorite Nandor line is "fu-cking guyee" which I've started using in my every day vernacular.

Not much to say about this episode that hasn't already been said. This was an extremely clever way to feature Colin Robinson in a new, fresh way that added to his mythos.

I absolutely love how they've expanded their mythology this season. I would love to see actual witches face off against Nadja.

One thing I did want to point out is Alison Jones was the casting director for the pilot. She has to be the most prolific casting director in Hollywood. I won't regurgitate her resume to you, but I know she's casted most of my favorite shows of all time and probably some of yours too. Here's a link to her IMDb page. https://m.imdb.com/name/nm0427456/?ref_=fn_al_nm_0

[7isBlue]

8 hours ago, Catfi9ht said:

One thing I did want to point out is Alison Jones was the casting director for the pilot. She has to be the most prolific casting director in Hollywood. I won't regurgitate her resume to you, but I know she's casted most of my favorite shows of all time and probably some of yours too.

Wow! You weren’t kidding! I need to follow her upcoming shows- no doubt they’ll be cool!

[pasdetrois]

Quote

Oh, and Guillermo trying to run interference for the fight: "What I'm hearing Nandor saying..."

With his hands held prayerfully under his chin while he beamed approval at everyone. Genius.

[Orbert]

That's right from the "better communications" playbook.  We had a mandatory meeting at work a few years back about how to make meetings and interactions more efficient and productive, while also being less confrontational.  To avoid misunderstandings, you repeat what you think you heard, and the person who said it can correct you on that (without attacking, of course) and so on.  Everything is kept cordial and positive and nice.

Bleah!!

Okay, it has its place, but whenever someone actually says "What I hear you saying is..." in a meeting, you can actually hear the eyes rolling.

Guillermo doing that of course was comedy gold.  Cracked me up, while giving me work flashbacks at the same time!

Let's face it, pretty much every line, in every scene, is incredible.  By time I get here, people have already quoted ten different things that were hilarious, and I can still think of few more.

[Moot Smoothie]

I know it's completely pathetic but this silly show is the highlight of my week and this episode ranks very close to City Council in my top 2.  

It just keeps getting better and better.  Laszlo and Nandor's off-camera bitching about who still has best hair in house as Colin floats down hallway under his newly-sprouted hair jungle?  Still giggling at that.

Edited May 14, 2020 by Moot Smoothie

[Mr. Sparkle]

Ugh, I'm listening to a work webinar right now, and the speaker sounds exactly like Colin Robinson. I'm getting drained by the minute. 

[seacliffsal]

On 5/14/2020 at 2:13 PM, Superclam said:

Ugh, I'm listening to a work webinar right now, and the speaker sounds exactly like Colin Robinson. I'm getting drained by the minute. 

The reality is that we don't know how many energy vampires exist.  So, I suggest you be very, very careful when participating in your work webinars...

[Mr. Sparkle]

And today I had an hour and half online training in MS Teams. THAT was draining. Webinars are the perfect medium for energy vampires. 

[thuganomics85]

Avoided spoilers going into this one, but I had heard a lot of talk about this episode (and it is currently only behind the Vampire Council episode in the IMDB rankings for the series), and it certainly lived up to the hype!

Obviously knew it was going to be a Colin-centric episode, and I loved almost every minute of it!  I liked the insights we got about his past like how he apparently "came with the house" according to Laszlo, and how he never actually gets hired by any of the companies he "works" for, but simply shows up and finds an empty cubicle, and everyone just assumes he's a new employee.  I could imagine that actually happening depending on the company (realistically, I have to imagine they'd figure it out soon, but I can see someone pulling it off for a few days or even a week.)  Loved that he didn't even know what the company actually did.

Seeing him accumulate more power and become arguably the most dangerous vampire out of the group was certainly a sight to behold!  Definitely wasn't predicting the multiple Colins, which was golden.  But, of course, that would be his downfall, since all of the Colins would totally bore each other to death!  But at least the main Colin is alive and now knows that the rest actually do care about him, even if they won't say it out loud!

On the non-Colin front, I loved the revelation that Nandor was the warlord that destroyed Nadja's village and the reaction to all of it.  Especially Nadja's "Persian Frank Zappa" remark.  Nice ad-lib from Natasia Demetriou!

Man, Guillermo could have finally been made a vampire if he wasn't so drained by Colin!  Just needed to get to Nador's opened mouth.  So close!

Extra shiny gold star to Mark Proksch here!