S04.E12: Change Of Heart

[Chickabiddy]

13 hours ago, sasha206 said:

I think Daddy O'Moneybags actually loves subsidizing his kids.  He loves the power of it and the adulation he probably gets from the girls because of it.  But he can't control Andrei and it pisses him off.

This!

It explains exactly why he was a deadbeat dad and had a brush with the law for not paying child support. Daddy Warbucks wasn’t going to give up any money for his kids that his bitch ex wife would control as long as they were minors in her custody.

But showering the kids with cash as adults gets him all the control and adulation he craves. Righteous indignation is his favorite emotion.

In some ways, Libby has paid her dad back for all the financial help he has given her because the arrangement feeds his ego and need for control. Her payback to daddy came in the form of emotional currency. 

[RealReality]

I think Libby's dad gets some pleasure in controlling his kids with money.  But he encouraged his other daughters to marry men who make good money and he doesn't seem to be financially involved in their lives.  

I think he would have encouraged his other daughters to marry poor guys if he wanted financial control.

Andrei and libby make all this possible by taking his money and depending on him.  Even Libby working for him is kind of a bad idea because he can always point to the "perks" he gives her.

Libby really needs to NOT go to her dad under any circumstances for the money for their wedding.  Andrei knows math so if he can find 15k somewhere that you didn't know you had, great.

[Spike]

If the cost of living is low in Moldova, even 15 grand seems kinda high.  Looks like Andrei is looking more to impress than hold a modest traditional wedding.

[RealReality]

1 minute ago, Spike said:

If the cost of living is low in Moldova, even 15 grand seems kinda high.  Looks like Andrei is looking more to impress than hold a modest traditional wedding.

Thay makes sense.  He seems like the type that would be heavily invested in putting forward an image of wealth befitting a man who sits on the couch drinking beers, sponging off his father in law and maybe doing a few handyman jobs.

[Pepper Mostly]

On 7/15/2019 at 8:35 PM, Barbara Please said:

Russ is the very definition of a milksop. He's such a wimp, and Pao continues to walk  all over him. He can't seem to do anything right. If he's not working...he not supporting his family. If he is working, he's not there for his family.  

Pao is ridiculous. She complains when Russ works, when he doesn't, when he travels, when he doesn't. Just WAIT until the high end, designer stroller Pao wants is not forthcoming. "Don't you want our baby to have the best?" Wait until she has to do another super professional video shoot in "New Yersey"! Who will watch the baby? Russ will have to take the time off! No, they can't hire a sitter or (horrors!) ask Russ's mother to fly in for a couple of days. She is going to use that baby as a club to beat Russ with every day of her life.

Remember when Russ was unemployed, and Pao slagged him off because "in Colombia, a man would do anything-anything! sell empanadas on the street!-to support his family!" Just don't get a good job in your field. It might make your spoiled lazy wife have to lift a manicured finger.

[Elizzikra]

Quote

I was happy Larissa said what a lot of us were thinking. 

It's almost like we wrote her a script...

Quote

If the cost of living is low in Moldova, even 15 grand seems kinda high.  Looks like Andrei is looking more to impress than hold a modest traditional wedding.

I think he feels like his Moldovan wedding, which will be attended by his family and friends primarily, should be equivalent in cost and "fanciness" to the US wedding. 

[Spike]

59 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

It's almost like we wrote her a script...

I think he feels like his Moldovan wedding, which will be attended by his family and friends primarily, should be equivalent in cost and "fanciness" to the US wedding. 

Wasn’t the Florida wedding just a small outdoor one kinda like Jonathan and Fernanda’s?

[alotmorestupider]

On 7/16/2019 at 5:39 AM, Toaster Strudel said:

No kidding, he needs buckets of butthurt cream every time he sees someone do something nice for someone else. It's like a personal slight to him. His infantile "pain" seems to run deep like he's holding back tears of frustration and anger.

Toaster Strudel, where are you epic recaps?! I used to look forward to them after every episode of whatever 90 day series was on before this one! They give me life. 

[LGGirl]

On 7/15/2019 at 3:06 PM, Spike said:

In the battle of Larissa versus the slot machine, the slot machine won.

Disagree.  The slot machine lost.  It still has to live with Deb and her little man.  Pretty sure the cats would want to escape from that dysfunctional hell hole.

[Spike]

6 minutes ago, LGGirl said:

Disagree.  The slot machine lost.  It still has to live with Deb and her little man.  Pretty sure the cats would want to escape from that dysfunctional hell hole.

Well at least it doesn’t have ears so it doesn’t have to hear “done” shouted all day.

[RealReality]

7 minutes ago, LGGirl said:

Disagree.  The slot machine lost.  It still has to live with Deb and her little man.  Pretty sure the cats would want to escape from that dysfunctional hell hole.

Maybe the cats are responsible for the slashed window screen......🤔

[DaphneCat]

1 hour ago, RealReality said:

Maybe the cats are responsible for the slashed window screen......🤔

Sure, blame Cookie Dough.😒  (Poor innocent cat gets blamed for everything.)

[Toaster Strudel]

4 hours ago, alotmorestupider said:

Toaster Strudel, where are you epic recaps?

This show has like 500 different spin offs! I can't keep up!

[Kangatush]

On ‎7‎/‎15‎/‎2019 at 6:09 PM, Spike said:

TLC crossover event:  Debbie has her wart removed by Dr. Pimple Popper!

i see in the ads they scramble the abscesses that are the size of baked potatoes.  Do they do that on the show too?  What’s the point of having a freak show and then denying the freak?

That's just the ads.  Most likely because with the show they have a warning of graphic content, but the ads air at all sorts of times without warning.

[Kangatush]

OK, while he is certainly not perfect, and could use some attitude adjustments, I'm still team Andrei.  I thought about it and DaddyLibby is just trying to stir up shit and make Andrei look bad.  Instead of telling Andrei that Libby can't keep coming to you for money, perhaps you should tell Libby?  Have a conversation with both of them instead of only Andrei that you know won't go well.

I'm also team Pedro.  It's been like 5 years.  If your husband didn't love you, he wouldn't have put up with the constant shit from you and your entire family for so long, green card or not.  Trust your husband, not some "friend" who waited YEARS to share some gossip he knew before you got married.

Ashley, you just wanted more D.  Don't try to tell me that Natalie wouldn't have scooted to your side to help you out.  You just want to "win" over his side pieces.

Larissa is no prize, but Colt and Debbie broke her.  She came in with certain expectations, that Colt was happy to sell her, and when he delivered on nothing, she snapped.  And I think the relationship between Colt and Debbie actually is that creeptastic.  I'm very close with my Dad and if I were on the show and a producer said something like, "can you be more touchy-feely?", I'd say no, cause that's weird.

Pao is a cow.  And I like how her mom kinda ended up on the side of Mother Russ about their behavior.

Can we be done with Nicole and Azan now?  Please?  And the obvious answer to what kind of fishing he does is catfishing.  I'm sad none of the pillow talkers made the joke.

[Spike]

I would think Azan avoids “fish” at all costs.

[DiamondGirl]

On 7/15/2019 at 5:09 PM, Spike said:

TLC crossover event:  Debbie has her wart removed by Dr. Pimple Popper!

Is this for real?!  If it is, Coltee will want to keep it on a chain around his neck 🤮

[bobalina]

6 hours ago, DaphneCat said:

Sure, blame Cookie Dough.😒  (Poor innocent cat gets blamed for everything.)

I thought Larissa had tried to throw a cat/cats out the window.

[magemaud]

6 hours ago, DaphneCat said:

Sure, blame Cookie Dough.😒  (Poor innocent cat gets blamed for everything.)

That reminds me, can someone refresh my memory. When we first met Coltee he was dressing THREE cats (in hindsight, this should have been a red flag). He introduced them as Cookie Dough, and Sugar but what was the third cat's name? One of them was on a shelf in the bedroom closet when Larissa opened the door, but did we ever see more than one cat at a time after that? 

Edited July 18, 2019 by magemaud

[Spike]

That would be Baby Girl.  

[magemaud]

3 hours ago, Spike said:

That would be Baby Girl.

Thanks! Maybe someday "Coltee's Kitties" will be the answer on Final Jeopardy and I'll be all ready! 

Edited July 18, 2019 by magemaud

[PinkFlamingo]

16 hours ago, Kangatush said:

That's just the ads.  Most likely because with the show they have a warning of graphic content, but the ads air at all sorts of times without warning.

I was so glad when they started blurring those ads. I figured it was due to viewer complaints. We are just minding our own business, trying to watch some other shit show, and bam, disgusting, gag-inducing footage no one asked for.

[PinkFlamingo]

On 7/16/2019 at 11:41 PM, HappyDancex2 said:

ive noticed we are all getting more annoyed and suspicious at the producer shenanigans....do you think the producers will try to next level try to outwit with each new series?

<snip>

Please cancel Roos and Pao...their storyline is over.  And take Family Chantel with you.

I think no, I think they will just continue to reuse the same tired formula designed to produce drama over and over again until we all lose 15 IQ points from the sheer stupidity of trying to suspend disbelief from watching this stupid crap... not that I am complaining lol. I need to be more stupider... it’s probably a conspiracy to trap smart people in a cycle of never ending stupid shows so that we get used to the stupidity and think it’s normal when stupid people take over the government... oh wait a minute...

Yes to making family chantel and Pao go away. My Pao watching has gone from hate watching to rage watching. Here’s to hoping the new family chantel spin off removes them permanently from the 90 day franchise. 

[Lemur]

17 hours ago, Kangatush said:

Larissa is no prize, but Colt and Debbie broke her.  She came in with certain expectations, that Colt was happy to sell her, and when he delivered on nothing, she snapped.  And I think the relationship between Colt and Debbie actually is that creeptastic.  I'm very close with my Dad and if I were on the show and a producer said something like, "can you be more touchy-feely?", I'd say no, cause that's weird..

I try not to be too judgy judgy about Colt and his mother and his relationship reminds me of a dear friend who passed who had a very similar relationship with his mother (who also passed).  His father died of MS when he was about 20, but had been wheelchair-bound or in residential care from the time my friend was 3 so he and his mother were very, very close due to dealing with the shared tragedy of living through that.  Yes, it was awkward at times, but in the end, they were all they had for each other.  So I try not to judge when it comes to that.  What seems awkward and odd to us, on the outside, could just be a coping mechanism built from years of relying solely on each other through extreme hardship. 

[Scarlett45]

5 hours ago, Lemur said:

I try not to be too judgy judgy about Colt and his mother and his relationship reminds me of a dear friend who passed who had a very similar relationship with his mother (who also passed).  His father died of MS when he was about 20, but had been wheelchair-bound or in residential care from the time my friend was 3 so he and his mother were very, very close due to dealing with the shared tragedy of living through that.  Yes, it was awkward at times, but in the end, they were all they had for each other.  So I try not to judge when it comes to that.  What seems awkward and odd to us, on the outside, could just be a coping mechanism built from years of relying solely on each other through extreme hardship. 

Which is fine- but then don’t try to marry someone and not be 100% upfront and honest with them about who’s important in the household.

Colt could chose to just have a girl friend/woman friend for the rest of his life for peer companionship and sex, while still living with his mother, no need to make that woman your wife and insinuate she will be your “partner” in life when you already have a partner. 

Edited to add- I know you didn’t mean anything by it, but people who use wheelchairs aren’t bound to them. 

[Mrs. Hanson]

On 7/15/2019 at 2:10 PM, RealReality said:

Not only is it unfair, but has it ever really worked long term?

No.  I am no longer married to the father of my children but I can say with straight honesty that they were conceived in love with their only agenda being.......being a baby.  I am sure most sane people on this thread, if parents, can say the same thing.  Pao, not so much.

[RealReality]

7 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Which is fine- but then don’t try to marry someone and not be 100% upfront and honest with them about who’s important in the household.

Colt could chose to just have a girl friend/woman friend for the rest of his life for peer companionship and sex, while still living with his mother, no need to make that woman your wife and insinuate she will be your “partner” in life when you already have a partner. 

Edited to add- I know you didn’t mean anything by it, but people who use wheelchairs aren’t bound to them. 

I can only look at it through my eyes, but it's a damn shame that Debbie got to live her life and now she has become an irremovable barnacle on colts life.

She knows what she is doing .  Her shifty eyes during her talking head when she was crying about how Colt was gonna blame her...and everyone was gonna think it was her fault.  Grade A manipulation and I can see where Colt gets it from.  Debbie probably cries to get her way regularly and with ease.  

She has constantly inserted herself in the marriage and on multiple occasions has been upset that she wasn't told something that wasn't even close to being her business.  

I despise Colt, but Debbie deserves the lion share of the blame.  She will never let Colt go to live his life with anyone.  He doesn't stand a shot at a normal relationship as long as Debbie is alive.  She will manipulate, pull out the water works, guilt and push away any woman in colts life.  

I suspect we'd hear the same story from colts ex girlfriend, in the unlikely event that she isn't fictional.

There are parents who live with their kids, but they aren't as toxic, manipulative and overinvolved as Debbie. 

Colt is never going to find a woman who will want to be with him long term.  He will live the rest of his sad existence married to his mom and paying for sex.  Is that really what a good mother wants for her child?  How very very sad.

Edited July 19, 2019 by RealReality

[DutchbutnoJesse]

Sorry if this was already beought up but did anyone noticed the writing on the appartment complex when Chantel and Pedro arrived at mother Pedro's apt.?

It read, if I saw that correct: "Aptos jr I"

In the next shot it dissapeared so I guess it was 'whiped' out by the producers or just a different angle. 

I guess it was the name of the complex? Anyone else noticed?

[TwirlyGirly]

14 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

<snip>

Edited to add- I know you didn’t mean anything by it, but people who use wheelchairs aren’t bound to them. 

Thank you! 

"Wheelchair user" is the more accurate term.

Edited July 19, 2019 by TwirlyGirly

[magemaud]

9 hours ago, DutchbutnoJesse said:

I guess it was the name of the complex? Anyone else notice?

I saw that, too, and just figured it was an abbreviation for “apartamentos” and some other identifying information. 

[Lemur]

19 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Edited to add- I know you didn’t mean anything by it, but people who use wheelchairs aren’t bound to them. 

Apologies to anyone who uses a wheelchair.

As to being 100% upfront, I can tell you from experience that even if Colt is, Debbie still will never allow him to have a normal relationship with a woman,  Debbie will continually eat up his emotional bandwidth and drown him with both need and guilt.  And no one will ever be good enough for Colt.  And all of his adult relationships will be crippled and hindered.   

Edited July 19, 2019 by Lemur

[Scarlett45]

24 minutes ago, Lemur said:

Apologies to anyone who uses a wheelchair.

As to being 100% upfront, I can tell you from experience that even if Colt is, Debbie still will never allow him to have a normal relationship with a woman,  Debbie will continually eat up his emotional bandwidth and drown him with both need and guilt.  And no one will ever be good enough for Colt.  And all of his adult relationships will be crippled and hindered.   

Yes I do blame Debbie for this more than Colt. He is a legally adult with all of his cognitive abilities BUT she’s his mother, she set up this dynamic. No matter how old you get or how much money you make your parents will always be your parents, it’s not a peer relationship. 

As someone who has a “non-traditional by North American standards” relationship with her mother (she lives in my building, we co-parent my disabled sister together, we are financially intertwined to a degree) even I can see how emotionally oppressive Debbie is towards Colt. Yes my Mom expects me to take care of the home (she jokes I’m the “landlord”) and care for my sister as I have agreed to do, but she’s not all in my grill about my peer relationships (sexual or otherwise). 

[Lemur]

28 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Yes I do blame Debbie for this more than Colt. He is a legally adult with all of his cognitive abilities BUT she’s his mother, she set up this dynamic. No matter how old you get or how much money you make your parents will always be your parents, it’s not a peer relationship. 

As someone who has a “non-traditional by North American standards” relationship with her mother (she lives in my building, we co-parent my disabled sister together, we are financially intertwined to a degree) even I can see how emotionally oppressive Debbie is towards Colt. Yes my Mom expects me to take care of the home (she jokes I’m the “landlord”) and care for my sister as I have agreed to do, but she’s not all in my grill about my peer relationships (sexual or otherwise). 

My mother moved in with my sister and me after my dad passed, and yes, it's not by any stretch of the imagination a peer relationship.  She's still very much my mother and still tells me to brush my hair and put on some lip gloss before leaving the house.  *sigh*  What seriously kills me with Debbie and Colt is the whole one car situation as it's such a control tactic.  Even if it's his car, his mother drives him back and forth to work, so there's no socializing or happy hours for Coltee and he has to clear all outings with her.  

Edited July 19, 2019 by Lemur

[Toaster Strudel]

26 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

but she’s not all in my grill about my peer relationships (sexual or otherwise). 

This is very biggee differencee.

[Lemur]

2 minutes ago, Toaster Strudel said:

This is very biggee differencee.

Hugee differncee.  Biggee Fatty Piggy differencee. 

Edited July 19, 2019 by Lemur

[DutchbutnoJesse]

2 hours ago, magemaud said:

I saw that, too, and just figured it was an abbreviation for “apartamentos” and some other identifying information. 

Ha, that is possible indeed and guess you are right.  Though there is an Aptos jr high school i  the USA. 

Questions, Questions 

[Morrissey]

18 hours ago, RealReality said:

I despise Colt, but Debbie deserves the lion share of the blame.  She will never let Colt go to live his life with anyone.  He doesn't stand a shot at a normal relationship as long as Debbie is alive.  She will manipulate, pull out the water works, guilt and push away any woman in colts life.  

With a mother like Debbie, Colt never really stood a chance. Even if she disappeared from his life tomorrow, he would still be left with her "legacy". She is the one who initially ignited and then spent years nurturing his contempt for women. He will never have a normal, healthy relationship unless he decides to go to therapy. 

I'm also fairly certain that he secretly despises his mother. They spend half their time joining forces to play mind games on Larissa and the other half playing mind games on and manipulating each other. 

Spoiler

And as much as I think that Larissa is utter trash, I'm glad that she got out. As unstable and violent as she can be, she has a chance to make a better life for herself - even if, for now, she hasn't shown any initiative to do so (unless you consider getting lip injections and anal bleaches "a better life"). 

She's not a lost cause. Unlike Debbie and Colt. And they would have drowned and destroyed her eventually. 

[seacliffsal]

7 hours ago, DutchbutnoJesse said:

Ha, that is possible indeed and guess you are right.  Though there is an Aptos jr high school i  the USA. 

Questions, Questions 

There is also an Aptos CA and an Aptos High School, both of which were a big part of my personal and profession lives!

[athousandclowns]

2 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

There is also an Aptos CA and an Aptos High School, both of which were a big part of my personal and profession lives!

Took a drive there Monday .  Capitol Aptos and Seacliff  Soquel are favorite  beaches from my youth.   Sea Cliff is where we would have our after prom outings

on topic : these people are ridiculous . 

[DutchbutnoJesse]

1 hour ago, athousandclowns said:

Took a drive there Monday .  Capitol Aptos and Seacliff  Soquel are favorite  beaches from my youth.   Sea Cliff is where we would have our after prom outings

on topic : these people are ridiculous . 

3 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

There is also an Aptos CA and an Aptos High School, both of which were a big part of my personal and profession lives!

Thanks. Last thing before ot again:) Where is Aptos standing for or coming from.

[Kangatush]

On ‎7‎/‎17‎/‎2019 at 11:18 PM, magemaud said:

That reminds me, can someone refresh my memory. When we first met Coltee he was dressing THREE cats (in hindsight, this should have been a red flag). He introduced them as Cookie Dough, and Sugar but what was the third cat's name? One of them was on a shelf in the bedroom closet when Larissa opened the door, but did we ever see more than one cat at a time after that? 

Larissa also got a cat.  I wonder what box it ended up in.

[Spike]

11 hours ago, DutchbutnoJesse said:

Thanks. Last thing before ot again:) Where is Aptos standing for or coming from.

It was written on the exterior of the building where Pedro’s mom and sister live.

8 hours ago, Kangatush said:

Larissa also got a cat.  I wonder what box it ended up in.

Is that Callie the Calico?  Hard to keep the names of four cats straight.

[DaphneCat]

2 hours ago, Spike said:

11 hours ago, Kangatush said:

Larissa also got a cat.  I wonder what box it ended up in.

Is that Callie the Calico?  Hard to keep the names of four cats straight.

If there is one thing I'm sure of it's that Colt and Debbie treat the cats VERY well.  Trust me that cat made out better than Larissa.

[seacliffsal]

14 hours ago, DutchbutnoJesse said:

Thanks. Last thing before ot again:) Where is Aptos standing for or coming from.

Aptos is from the indigenous language, not sure of the exact meaning.  And, alas, SeaCliff Beach is where I used to live, hence my moniker of Seacliff Sal.  Still haven't emotionally recovered from having to move...

[Elizzikra]

Quote

If there is one thing I'm sure of it's that Colt and Debbie treat the cats VERY well.  Trust me that cat made out better than Larissa.

That's a low bar. I think I recall that Larissa's cat didn't get along with Coltee and Debbie's cats (shocker) so hopefully it found a friendlier home too.

[Persnickety1]

On 7/18/2019 at 1:52 PM, Scarlett45 said:

Which is fine- but then don’t try to marry someone and not be 100% upfront and honest with them about who’s important in the household.

Colt could chose to just have a girl friend/woman friend for the rest of his life for peer companionship and sex, while still living with his mother, no need to make that woman your wife and insinuate she will be your “partner” in life when you already have a partner. 

Edited to add- I know you didn’t mean anything by it, but people who use wheelchairs aren’t bound to them. 

On 7/19/2019 at 4:24 AM, TwirlyGirly said:

Thank you! 

"Wheelchair user" is the more accurate term.

On 7/19/2019 at 9:03 AM, Lemur said:

Apologies to anyone who uses a wheelchair.

As to being 100% upfront, I can tell you from experience that even if Colt is, Debbie still will never allow him to have a normal relationship with a woman,  Debbie will continually eat up his emotional bandwidth and drown him with both need and guilt.  And no one will ever be good enough for Colt.  And all of his adult relationships will be crippled and hindered.   

I process medical disability claims and "wheelchair bound" is indeed the correct medical terminology.  It simply means the individual relies on a wheelchair for ambulation.  It is not intended to be derogatory/inflammatory/insulting to anyone.  It's simply the appropriate medical terminology when referring to reliance upon a wheelchair for mobility.

On another more on-topic note, I can't wait to see the interactions between Debbie, Colt-y, and Larissa-y at the reunion.  Should be very entertaining-y.  I'm wondering if Debbie will there to hold Colty's hand or if she'll be via call-in as Larissa apparently is.  

[Spike]

Every time I read the episode name I get a Cyndi Lauper earworm.  Turn it around, round, round.

[Mothra]

On 7/9/2019 at 10:08 AM, Bryce Lynch said:

I get what you are saying.  But, I can also understand him wanting to tell Andrrrei he needs to get a job, rather than just cutting them off and forcing him to, and leaving cutting them off as a last resort.     

Yeah, but surely Andale has received the message.  It's insulting and maddening to be lectured about the same thing over and over again if you're an adult.

Father Elizabeth needs to stop with the empty threats and do what he's said over and over that he will do--cut them off.  He keeps telling Andale the same thing without the result he wants; why can't he see that he's doing the exact same thing, saying the same thing about his own behavior over and over with no result--through his own inaction?  It isn't Andale's fault that Father Elizabeth apparently doesn't mean what he says about his own actions.

The irony is rich in this family.

[iwasish]

Father Libby needs to talk to LIBBY and tell her to stop coming to the well for money. Andrei has made his point clear. He doesn’t want to discuss money with Father Libby. 

If Andrei doesn’t step up then it’s up to Libby to figure out what to do. She’s an adult, she has options.  I’m sure there are plenty of women on this forum (or their mothers) who faced similar situations. 

[nytonc]

Libby’s sisters are horrified to hear Libby has to do her own cleaning with a newborn. It shows how entitled and spoiled these girls are. I bet Libby isn’t the only one going to Daddy for a cash infusion now and then.