S10.E12: Tell All: Part 1

[deirdra]

20 minutes ago, suomi said:

Old plyg adage I read the other day, IIRC in a memoir called The Sound of Gravel: "Ten percent of a good man is better than one hundred percent of a bad man." 

Nobody needs to put up with 100% of a bad man.

[Sandy W]

5 minutes ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I agree that Meri isn’t the clear villain when it comes to how she and Janelle don’t get along. 

Divorcing your brother for your husband is WEIRD.

But in terms of living together, can you imagine?! I can’t imagine living with either one, but I would especially pull my hair out if I had to live with Janelle. Do you think she ever washed dishes or unloaded the dishwasher? Can you imagine figuring out dinner? I bet she never offered suggestions for meals, or went to the grocery, or cooked dinner without a lot of Strife. Meanwhile I bet Meri washes her glass as soon as she uses it. 

My understanding of polygamy is that the wife(s) have veto power on who comes into the family and given Meri's understandable feeling of animosity for Janelle, why didn't she exercise it?  The attraction of Kody to Janelle wasn't her physical appearance, she was slimmer back in the day before 6 kids, but Kody was a handsome dude back then and could have attracted a more physically pleasing woman.  I believe that Kody related to Janelle on a level of friendship more so than lust and that may have been more acceptable to Meri, until Janelle began popping out babies and showing Meri that there was more than just a platonic relationship happening.

I have also wondered, which came first, Janelle's lackadaisical attitude annoying Meri or Janelle realizing that she would never meet Meri's fastidious standards and just giving up.

[kicotan]

2 hours ago, Sandy W said:

When Kody was in talks to put the show together, he begged Janelle to return to the fold and although I have never heard this expressed, part of the reason she returned may have been the fact that the show income would relieve the financial demands on her, because at that time she was the only one with a reliable job.

According to her “memoir”, she was gone for two years until the they made the move to the house in Utah 

 "We were able to be together as a family in a normal and relaxed way," she wrote. "I had my own space, but my kids had their siblings and the other mothers in the same building." They've been together ever since.

[Sokokei]

1 hour ago, deirdra said:

Maybe Tony & Mykelti are aiming for their own TLC show, "Becoming Tonya".  Mykelti will start by dressing him in LulaNo with matching stick-on nails.

Ya never know.  When he had short hair he looked like female transitioning to male.  His face and eyes were pretty, but it was like he grew the catfish whiskers for masculinity.  Now with long hair and weight gain, looks like male to female.   Are the catfish whiskers gone?  It will be interesting to see how this develops. 

[kicotan]

29 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

My understanding of polygamy is that the wife(s) have veto power on who comes into the family and given Meri's understandable feeling of animosity for Janelle, why didn't she exercise it? 

Bingo.

More grist for the mill:

According to court documents, Janelle and Meri’s brother finalized their divorce in June 1990. Janelle got to keep their house; he received two cars and a motorcycle. Incidentally, Janelle purportedly met Kody while she was still married. "When he walked into the room I looked at him and had that feeling of remembering something I had forgotten. It was a singular experience." 

Janelle's mother, Sheryl, married Kody's dad, Winn, three months BEFORE Janelle and Kody created their spiritual union. Sheryl and Winn's marriage created a plural union between them and Winn's first wife, Kody's mother, Genielle.

I can’t imagine what being around one of the Brown men must feel like...the intoxicating draw of it all...

[kicotan]

3 hours ago, Tuxcat said:

There must be a reason for that?

It’s been my experience some people just aren’t wired for it.

I’ve known a few social hermits and basically asexual people (unless they intend to procreate) and they appear to be just fine with it, with the exception that they wish the rest of us who can’t wrap their heads around it would stop thinking there is something wrong with them.

[NotinKansasanymore]

Can you imagine what the Brown family would be like right now if they didn't have their TLC gravy train?

I'm convinced that Mariah would be a second or third wife, secretly in the closet.

Janelle would be working and still relying on her own children to cook and clean.

Christine would not be working, and living off of government assistance.

all four wives would be miserable, and I doubt many of the children would be going to college.

[Sandy W]

6 minutes ago, NotinKansasanymore said:

Can you imagine what the Brown family would be like right now if they didn't have their TLC gravy train?

I'm convinced that Mariah would be a second or third wife, secretly in the closet.

Janelle would be working and still relying on her own children to cook and clean.

Christine would not be working, and living off of government assistance.

all four wives would be miserable, and I doubt many of the children would be going to college.

If they were still living in Lehi, without the benefit of TLC income, there would still be just the 3 OG's.  I just don't see Robyn joining the family to live in a wing added on to the Lehi house. Robyn claims that when Kody was courting her that the fact the family was negotiating for the show gave her reason to have second thoughts.  I call BS on that, I think it was a motivating factor and she saw the light out of the tunnel and hopped right on board the train. 

[Natalie68]

5 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

If they were still living in Lehi, without the benefit of TLC income, there would still be just the 3 OG's.  I just don't see Robyn joining the family to live in a wing added on to the Lehi house. Robyn claims that when Kody was courting her that the fact the family was negotiating for the show gave her reason to have second thoughts.  I call BS on that, I think it was a motivating factor and she saw the light out of the tunnel and hopped right on board the train. 

I do as well.  Since the outing of her IMBD entry I think the show is what sealed it for her.  She was gonna be a STAH no matter what.  Even if that meant marrying this dude.

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2585315/

[Sandy W]

6 minutes ago, Natalie68 said:

I do as well.  Since the outing of her IMBD entry I think the show is what sealed it for her.  She was gonna be a STAH no matter what.  Even if that meant marrying this dude.

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2585315/

I have read that those imdb entries have been disputed and it has been claimed that it was another Robyn Brown.  

Coincidence?  I wonder.

[Natalie68]

5 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

I have read that those imdb entries have been disputed and it has been claimed that it was another Robyn Brown.  

Coincidence?  I wonder.

Interesting.  I may have a project now for this weekend.  Try and find these episodes!

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

1 hour ago, Sandy W said:

If they were still living in Lehi, without the benefit of TLC income, there would still be just the 3 OG's.  I just don't see Robyn joining the family to live in a wing added on to the Lehi house. Robyn claims that when Kody was courting her that the fact the family was negotiating for the show gave her reason to have second thoughts.  I call BS on that, I think it was a motivating factor and she saw the light out of the tunnel and hopped right on board the train. 

Well the Victoria's Secret bill wasn't going to pay for itself now was it ?

[deirdra]

1 hour ago, Sandy W said:

I have read that those imdb entries have been disputed and it has been claimed that it was another Robyn Brown.  

Coincidence?  I wonder.

For Just Shoot Me IMDB says "Robyn Brown" was the name credited in 1998, a decade or more before she met Kootie.  Episode "Steamed" playing a "model".

[Sandy W]

2 minutes ago, deirdra said:

For Just Shoot Me IMDB says "Robyn Brown" was the name credited in 1998, a decade or more before she met Kootie.  Episode "Steamed" playing a "model".

So it must be right then that it was a different Robyn Brown.  In 1998 she was still Robyn Jessop.

[ginger90]

It also lists Robyn as dating Kody for 5 years before they got married. 🤦‍♀️

[deirdra]

5 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

It also lists Robyn as dating Kody for 5 years before they got married. 🤦‍♀️

That is probably about right for her legal marriage to Kody, a few years after her celestial marriage and first honeymoon.

Edited April 18, 2019 by deirdra

[xwordfanatik]

1 hour ago, Sandy W said:

If they were still living in Lehi, without the benefit of TLC income, there would still be just the 3 OG's.  I just don't see Robyn joining the family to live in a wing added on to the Lehi house. Robyn claims that when Kody was courting her that the fact the family was negotiating for the show gave her reason to have second thoughts.  I call BS on that, I think it was a motivating factor and she saw the light out of the tunnel and hopped right on board the train. 

I think so, too.  I read somewhere that Robo actually has an acting credit, as a cheerleader in some movie.  She clearly loves to hear herself talk, and it seems to me that the promise of getting her chin on camera, silled the dill.

1 hour ago, Natalie68 said:

I do as well.  Since the outing of her IMBD entry I think the show is what sealed it for her.  She was gonna be a STAH no matter what.  Even if that meant marrying this dude.

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2585315/

Right?  I hadn't read all the comments yet, so I echoed your post.  

[deirdra]

Meri married Kootie 21 April 1990 and Mariah wasn't born until 29 Jul 1995.  I wonder if her failure to get pregnant is what got Meri to accept wife #2 so that Kootie could spawn successfully and get them all into heaven. 

[kicotan]

34 minutes ago, deirdra said:

Meri married Kootie 21 April 1990 and Mariah wasn't born until 29 Jul 1995.  I wonder if her failure to get pregnant is what got Meri to accept wife #2 so that Kootie could spawn successfully and get them all into heaven. 

Indeed!

If not INTO heaven, at least a better table.

Mariah is actually child #3...both Janelle and Christine beat Meri to that finish line.

[Joan of Argh]

6 hours ago, AZChristian said:

Inflation:  It's now 3-Buck Chuck.

I'm a gramma who lives in a trailer.  I know stuff.

Good to know, hubby and I picked up a bottle many years ago and couldn't believe how good it was.

I'm also a gramma,  don't normally sing but I was singing that night.  😂

[LuvMyShows]

I guess the host is a mini-Robyn.  She mentioned something like, ".....as happens every year", or some other thing implying that she has been with these Tell-Alls for all those years...just like how Robyn does regarding the fambly's past!

Plus, she made a big blunder near the start when she was talking to Meri and said that the Parowan house "has been a dream of yours, and your family".  Uh, big-time no.

On 4/14/2019 at 11:48 PM, NotinKansasanymore said:

1. This host is lame. She reminds me of an undergrad psych student. Let's get a real talk show host to ask the tough questions! 

We need Kevin Frazier, who just did the Married at First Sight reunion.  He asked the tough questions, and persisted for answers, all in a respectful way.  He kicked a**!

9 hours ago, toodles said:

I read SIL as sister-in-law.😄😄

So did I....so, uh, what did it actually mean?

On 4/15/2019 at 9:30 AM, Twopper said:

I was going to ask who was sitting next to Grendolyn, but someone said it was Garrison.  Why was he there if the moderator wasn't going to ask him at least one question?  Also Dayton made no comments, either. 

I'm not sure that it was actually that Garrison and Dayton made no comments and weren't asked any questions, but more that the episode was edited and their comments didn't make the cut.

On 4/15/2019 at 1:41 PM, LucyEth said:

Also, not mentioned on this boring tell all but Janelle said Axel is the center of her world or something like that, really?  You still have young children living home and you care more about missing Axel than the fact that your son is very distraught and does not want to move. 

Good point!  I would be very angry if I were one of her kids, and would want to throw it back to her every time she said something like, "I love you."

[deirdra]

32 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

So did I....so, uh, what did it actually mean?

SIL = sister-in-law, but also son-in-law.  Funny that we all thought "sister" first.

Edited April 19, 2019 by deirdra

[Kijod1]

On 4/18/2019 at 10:19 AM, Natalie68 said:

Interesting.  I may have a project now for this weekend.  Try and find these episodes!

Season 3 ep. 2

About 15:13 in

She is the tall skinny blond model that walks by and says hi to the guy sitting down.

Now

1. I don't think that robyn looked like that back then 

2. She would have been credited as robyn Sullivan or jessop

3. There was an actress (named robyn brown) who looked very similar to the one on JSM who was also a penthouse movie actress.

Edited April 20, 2019 by Kijod1

[Adiba]

21 hours ago, Sandy W said:

My understanding of polygamy is that the wife(s) have veto power on who comes into the family and given Meri's understandable feeling of animosity for Janelle, why didn't she exercise it?  The attraction of Kody to Janelle wasn't her physical appearance, she was slimmer back in the day before 6 kids, but Kody was a handsome dude back then and could have attracted a more physically pleasing woman.  I believe that Kody related to Janelle on a level of friendship more so than lust and that may have been more acceptable to Meri, until Janelle began popping out babies and showing Meri that there was more than just a platonic relationship happening.

I have also wondered, which came first, Janelle's lackadaisical attitude annoying Meri or Janelle realizing that she would never meet Meri's fastidious standards and just giving up.

They may technically have veto power, but when Kody wants something, he usually gets it — look how everybody got on board with the move to Flagstaff. If Kody and Janelle believed that she had some sort of testimony or inspiration from God that Janelle was meant to br Kody’s wife, Meri would have a hard time going against that. 

Meri and Janelle are very different personalities so living together could not have been easy for either of them. The fact that Janelle got pregnant first and delivered a son to Kody likely didn’t help matters.

[KnoxForPres]

3 hours ago, Adiba said:

They may technically have veto power, but when Kody wants something, he usually gets it — look how everybody got on board with the move to Flagstaff. If Kody and Janelle believed that she had some sort of testimony or inspiration from God that Janelle was meant to br Kody’s wife, Meri would have a hard time going against that. 

Meri and Janelle are very different personalities so living together could not have been easy for either of them. The fact that Janelle got pregnant first and delivered a son to Kody likely didn’t help matters.

Agree. And as can happen I’ve read many times about Janelle divorcing Meri’s brother but I actually thought that through today  (to my chagrin) and have nearly vomited.  Six degrees of separation is one thing, one degree oh blech!

On 4/18/2019 at 11:20 AM, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I agree that Meri isn’t the clear villain when it comes to how she and Janelle don’t get along. 

Divorcing your brother for your husband is WEIRD.

But in terms of living together, can you imagine?! I can’t imagine living with either one, but I would especially pull my hair out if I had to live with Janelle. Do you think she ever washed dishes or unloaded the dishwasher? Can you imagine figuring out dinner? I bet she never offered suggestions for meals, or went to the grocery, or cooked dinner without a lot of Strife. Meanwhile I bet Meri washes her glass as soon as she uses it. 

Respectfully disagree. I bet she was full of suggestions just zero assistance in making that happen. “Spaghetti and meatballs in Alfredo!  A happy marriage!  Quick someone run to the store”. 

I shouldn’t make fun of her- heavens knows I wake up daily going “today I will be healthy and amazing” and fail but I’m not obese but even more I don’t push that as a moneymaker so I view that where she’s open game.   

I love that Robyn isn’t a classic beauty. She views herself as a queen bee but  she’s pathetically average looking.  Christine has her beat at this point in looks. 

As much as I hate to admit Kody was, damn I hate typing this, good looking in youth. While his hair is a bigger sin than a Protestant views polygamy I think stress and the ridiculous behavior is why we now have an ugly Kody. He’s like a tightly wound ball of “ideas” that are fruitless.  And yet he puts such importance on them as if the MEAN something.  

Maybe that’s why I can’t hate Meri. She never seems to play into this crap the way others do. She was like “eh, this land is fine and I’ll move there” and the rest are “if you didn’t hear angels singing I don’t even understand how you call yourself human”. I think I like her whatever I’ll sell my leggings attitude bc I hate this family and feel the same way.  

[LuvMyShows]

Someone who's more knowledgeable than me can hopefully speak to this...they all very adamantly said that they had never even spoken of leaving Lehi until the persecution thing.  Is that true?

[Natalie68]

13 hours ago, Kijod1 said:

Season 3 ep. 2

About 15:13 in

She is the tall skinny blond model that walks by and says hi to the guy sitting down.

Now

1. I don't think that robyn looked like that back then 

2. She would have been credited as robyn Sullivan or jessop

3. There was an actress who looked very similar to the one on JSM who was also a penthouse movie actress.

Thank you!

[neh]

On 4/17/2019 at 9:34 AM, Mr. Minor said:

I just started watching this season and I saw the FT and Mykelti wedding rerun yesterday. Did FT and Mykelti get any more airtime after the wedding? I ask because they were making FT out to be the best SIL anyone could ever hope for and I thought he was a total jerkoff. Wasn't crazy bout Mykelti either.

My thinking is that Tony and Mykelti have chosen to be the quirky, fun loving outliers in the Brown family. They are suppose to be the comic relief in the script. It is not working for anyone with a brain but I don't think that the Browns get it. I also think that a lot gets edited out.

[giaNtsandYankees]

On 4/17/2019 at 12:56 PM, ginger90 said:

Just watched this on YouTube. 

Robyn really can’t just shut up about things that have nothing to do with her. While discussing moving 19 times, there she sat, looking like a bobble head, and talked as if she was part of it all.

Now that I know they rented one house together when they moved to Vegas.......Robyn had a rental in Utah, moved to rental #1 in Vegas, then rental # 2 in Vegas, to the house she bought, and now to Flagstaff. Correct? 

But...but...they "shouda" been together from day one.

The disturbingly creepy pencil drawing confirms this! 

😨

[giaNtsandYankees]

On 4/17/2019 at 1:02 PM, xwordfanatik said:

That's all I can remember.  She irritates the hell out of me with her pretending she "shoulda been together from day 1."  That creepy drawing of Kootie with her kids when they were small is proof - that woman is magical and can rewrite history (snort, cough, cough.)

Whoops! I "shoulda" read your post before "postingk" mine! Sorry!

[Sokokei]

3 hours ago, neh said:

My thinking is that Tony and Mykelti have chosen to be the quirky, fun loving outliers in the Brown family. They are suppose to be the comic relief in the script. It is not working for anyone with a brain but I don't think that the Browns get it. I also think that a lot gets edited out.

Agree.  I wish the producers & editors would focus on this.  Show shots of his wittiness going terribly wrong.  Like the "get a second mortgage on your house" and "does anyone have a tampon" comments.  They are so memorable and snarkworthy.  I think this formula would be a win.

[AZChristian]

4 hours ago, neh said:

My thinking is that Tony and Mykelti have chosen to be the quirky, fun loving outliers in the Brown family. They are suppose to be the comic relief in the script. It is not working for anyone with a brain but I don't think that the Browns get it. I also think that a lot gets edited out.

But the kids are such a SMALL part of this show - and once they grow up and go off to college, they become nearly non-existent until it's wedding time.  Then they get a wedding episode, and move back into Oblivion (right next to St. George - LOL).  

This show has become episode after episode of Kody or one of the sisterwives making unfathomable (to sane people) decisions, and then they all run around like confused Keystone Kops trying to figure themselves out.

I rarely watch it these days.  I just hang around here for the snark, and to let you all decide whether there's something happening that I HAVE to watch.

[ginger90]

From part 2:

https://mobile.twitter.com/TLC/status/1119669744091705347

[Sandy W]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

From part 2:

https://mobile.twitter.com/TLC/status/1119669744091705347

What a relief it must be to the family to have Robyn there to interpret what they were thinking.

Sit down and shut up Robyn.

[Joan of Argh]

41 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

What a relief it must be to the family to have Robyn there to interpret what they were thinking.

Sit down and shut up Robyn.

I can't get over how she regularly shits on all of their ideas past, present, future and they sit there like scolded children listening to mommy.

No one challenges her... They just sit there looking stupid while mommy lectures.

[Sandy W]

 

 

 

4 minutes ago, Joan of Argh said:

I can't get over how she regularly shits on all of their ideas past, present, future and they sit there like scolded children listening to mommy. 

No one challenges her... They just sit there looking stupid while mommy lectures.

She must be a real PITA to have to contend with daily.  I would love it if Christine had invited her over to her "liberry" for a sit down chat as she did with Meri.

[Jeanne222]

Fat Tony has long hair????  Just saw the coming attractions of Reunion 2.  He's a mess.  Way too young to let himself go like that and I can't imagine him being a banker????

[keepitsimple]

They have not shown either tell-all here. Central Texas.  It airs tonight.  I have enjoyed getting a preview through you all.

[Kyanight]

On 4/18/2019 at 9:14 AM, Sandy W said:

Kind of reminds me of the old SNL skit, "Lowered Expectations".  Why wouldn't they aim for 100% of a good man.

Curious thought here.  If more people believed in polygamy and it was not illegal.... 

All of those women who have affairs with married men... if the man could marry them and add them to the family (first wife obviously has no say or she can leave with a bunch of young ones to support)  - would they?  I think many of those "other women" WOULD!  Think about how many men have affairs... divorce their wives and then marry their girlfriends.

[deirdra]

But there are also 'other women' who don't want to marry the dude and become his cook, nurse, housekeeper and laundress or hear him boast about himself day in day out - they'd prefer to be wined, dined, serviced, and then have lots of peaceful time to themselves.

[Kyanight]

8 minutes ago, deirdra said:

But there are also 'other women' who don't want to marry the dude and become his cook, nurse, housekeeper and laundress or hear him boast about himself day in day out - they'd prefer to be wined, dined, serviced, and then have lots of peaceful time to themselves.

Right!  But they are still sharing the man. (And his penis.)  And the other woman DOES get pregnant often enough in our society. So I believe it is a fine line between calling the other women your "wives" or calling the other woman (women) your girlfriend(s).  You can't legally marry more than one woman.  The man can go back and forth between his wife and his girlfriend-who-only-wants-to-be-a-girlfriend - just as the polygamist goes back and forth between his legal wife (if he married legally, which usually they do) and his subsequent "wives".  When you get down to it, what is the difference?  What the individual tells himself/herself in their own head?  Isn't it all definition?  

Edited February 5, 2020 by Kyanight

[DaphneCat]

12 hours ago, Kyanight said:

Think about how many men have affairs... divorce their wives and then marry their girlfriends.

That's just it, they divorce their wives.  The women put up with it because they think the man is "misunderstood" or in a "loveless marriage" and THEY are the one he really loves.  They really believe they are the favorite.  They don't want to believe there is another woman who he loves equally (or even more.)

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, Kyanight said:

Right!  But they are still sharing the man. (And his penis.)  And the other woman DOES get pregnant often enough in our society. So I believe it is a fine line between calling the other women your "wives" or calling the other woman (women) your girlfriend(s).  You can't legally marry more than one woman.  The man can go back and forth between his wife and his girlfriend-who-only-wants-to-be-a-girlfriend - just as the polygamist goes back and forth between his legal wife (if he married legally, which usually they do) and his subsequent "wives".  When you get down to it, what is the difference?  What the individual tells himself/herself in their own head?  Isn't it all definition?  

I've thought about this myself.  To answer your question, in a word "yes", it's all definition.  I think these people tell themselves that even if it's not a "legal" marriage, it's still a marriage in the eyes of God.  They don't define or recognize marriage in any legal context, only a religious one.

1 hour ago, DaphneCat said:

That's just it, they divorce their wives.  The women put up with it because they think the man is "misunderstood" or in a "loveless marriage" and THEY are the one he really loves.  They really believe they are the favorite.  They don't want to believe there is another woman who he loves equally (or even more.)

It depends.  Some men cheat because they aren't getting all their needs met from their marriage.  So the spouse and girlfriend fulfill different needs.  Sometimes it's hard to separate out which one they need more or less.  It's like picking a favorite child - not so easy to do.  With mistresses as with polyg wives I'm sure they may accept this and know that they are not meeting needs that the other wife/wives or girlfriend meets.  Each one feels "special" to him and loved for different reasons.  It's not always that they believe they are loved more than the others.

[Roslyn]

13 hours ago, Kyanight said:

Right!  But they are still sharing the man. (And his penis.)  And the other woman DOES get pregnant often enough in our society. So I believe it is a fine line between calling the other women your "wives" or calling the other woman (women) your girlfriend(s).  You can't legally marry more than one woman.  The man can go back and forth between his wife and his girlfriend-who-only-wants-to-be-a-girlfriend - just as the polygamist goes back and forth between his legal wife (if he married legally, which usually they do) and his subsequent "wives".  When you get down to it, what is the difference?  What the individual tells himself/herself in their own head?  Isn't it all definition?  

How many mistresses want to be the mistress tho.  How many are thinking that they are putting in time and effort and will be rewarded with the man all to themselves in the end?  I'm sure with some women (and men) that it is sometimes the win, the "forbidden fruit" that fuels the relationship. You didn't just find the perfect significant other.  You TOOK them from someone else. Woo Woo.

I believe (looking at it with the Browns...) that Janelle is honestly the only wife that has fully accepted that Kody has other wives, she is solid in her role, but where she gets pissy (I am assuming from watching this for so long) is when things aren't fair between wives. Fair in time, Fair in money etc. She is much less "needy" in the emotional way and she's isn't even in touch very well with her own emotions, which has led to her stress eating and most likely depression over the years.

How many wives are going to say to their husbands, keep the mistress darlin, you pay for my house and our kids and go have exciting monkey sex with her.  Yes.  There may be women out there that are perfectly fine with it, but the average wife in my opinion is going to say "choose bud" While girlfriends may be content without a legal document as a wife, how many are content with having multiple other girlfriends?

Marriages/Relationships are hard work.  You can get lost in your world and stop working on your marriage, or your spouse can do the same and you wake up 10 years later and you are 2 very different people. There are plenty of people, men and women, who just can't settle with one person.   While I'm sure that there are those that can be content sharing in a polygamous relationship, when you bring the religious demands into it, I'm sure many more than ever admit it are suffering. Judging by what I'm reading about the current episode (online but not shown yet) Christine is no longer "wanting the family, not just the man".  She isn't distracted by a hoard of children anymore.  As the kids grow up those 5 adults are going to have to look at each other and figure it all out for themselves.  Sadly the women may have grown and matured (not sure about Meri tho), but they are still saddled with an older Man Child.

[Kyanight]

12 minutes ago, Roslyn said:

How many mistresses want to be the mistress tho.  How many are thinking that they are putting in time and effort and will be rewarded with the man all to themselves in the end?  I'm sure with some women (and men) that it is sometimes the win, the "forbidden fruit" that fuels the relationship. You didn't just find the perfect significant other.  You TOOK them from someone else. Woo Woo.

I believe (looking at it with the Browns...) that Janelle is honestly the only wife that has fully accepted that Kody has other wives, she is solid in her role, but where she gets pissy (I am assuming from watching this for so long) is when things aren't fair between wives. Fair in time, Fair in money etc. She is much less "needy" in the emotional way and she's isn't even in touch very well with her own emotions, which has led to her stress eating and most likely depression over the years.

How many wives are going to say to their husbands, keep the mistress darlin, you pay for my house and our kids and go have exciting monkey sex with her.  Yes.  There may be women out there that are perfectly fine with it, but the average wife in my opinion is going to say "choose bud" While girlfriends may be content without a legal document as a wife, how many are content with having multiple other girlfriends?

Marriages/Relationships are hard work.  You can get lost in your world and stop working on your marriage, or your spouse can do the same and you wake up 10 years later and you are 2 very different people. There are plenty of people, men and women, who just can't settle with one person.   While I'm sure that there are those that can be content sharing in a polygamous relationship, when you bring the religious demands into it, I'm sure many more than ever admit it are suffering. Judging by what I'm reading about the current episode (online but not shown yet) Christine is no longer "wanting the family, not just the man".  She isn't distracted by a hoard of children anymore.  As the kids grow up those 5 adults are going to have to look at each other and figure it all out for themselves.  Sadly the women may have grown and matured (not sure about Meri tho), but they are still saddled with an older Man Child.

I think that polygamy = misery.  Second, third, etc. wives go into the situation KNOWING they are not the only one.  I've never known a first wife who was happy.  And like you said... people change through the years... so even though someone MIGHT have thought this lifestyle was going to work for them, down the road they might believe differently.

Except for Robyn who is now the legal wife and a harping whiner/chronic griper - I don't believe any of the wives are happy.  I don't believe Kody is, either.

[Roslyn]

35 minutes ago, Kyanight said:

I think that polygamy = misery.  Second, third, etc. wives go into the situation KNOWING they are not the only one.  I've never known a first wife who was happy.  And like you said... people change through the years... so even though someone MIGHT have thought this lifestyle was going to work for them, down the road they might believe differently.

Except for Robyn who is now the legal wife and a harping whiner/chronic griper - I don't believe any of the wives are happy.  I don't believe Kody is, either.

I can see Meri going into it with the attitude of "I want the man enough to agree to polygamy" and since she was raised in it, then thinking that as the first wife she will somehow have a say in the women who follow. And just maybe...he will wake up and realize she is all he needs.... She is obviously very fussy about how her domain is set up.  Furniture just so, cups in the cabinet just so, towels folded and placed just so.  So, yea...she wants to be sure she has control over the domain no matter who is coming in. We all know how well THAT worked out for them with Janelle.

I call bullshit on the beginning of the show when they said Meri was responsible for bringing the others in. They blew that theory in their book. While I think that Meri thought she could train the others to do it her way, the fact that they started churning out babies while she didn't had to have cut her deep. Then Janelle and Christine getting along and Kody busy with work and babies leaves Meri on the outside looking in. Mariah kept her just enough inside the circle.

Christine is and always has been a hot mess. Raised in a "bubble of fear" and to this day is emotionally immature. Seemingly clueless about the heartbreak of polygamy, thinking she has it all figured out by entering as that third wife.  That way she doesn't have to do any "real" work, just blend in with what everyone else is doing, she has the hots for Kody (they all do 🙄) and then churn out babies and play happy family with all the children. She kept her delusion up for many years until Robyn shattered it and Christine had to actually realize she is only a cog in the wheel. Especially only a piece of the whole to Kody...

Robyn is interesting.  She is letting a few tidbits fall this season about how she had plenty of prospects for marriage back in the day, but she only wanted polygamy. She wants the "perfect" polygamist family, she thought she found it with the Browns because they all lived as one big family instead of separate ones. Or so she thought.  I can't believe in knowing them, and then a 10 month engagement that she never knew they moved as often as they did. She wanted her kids to be incorporated into the family and accepted as one of them, and I'll bet dollars to donuts that she made that very clear to Kody.  He was very protective of her kids and fought against the wives' belief that Robyn the girlfriend didn't deserve equal time as they got. She was on that "this is what perfect polygamy is supposed to be...and YOU BROWNS are gonna give it to me."

Maybe another family would have put up with her, but from other polygamist stories, not her kids.  There is plenty out there to say that "sister wives" take out their frustrations on the children.  Robyn is a helicopter mom. She wants that perfect family and she learned "Kody communication" to guide him to shape her perfect family.  Playing that quiet damsel in distress and "obeying" and "needing" and "never going against his wishes" crap is just that.  Manipulative crap. She gets pissed that they all don't jump into her business idea.  She gets pissed that Meri is going to school because it takes her away from the Perfect Family that Robyn is trying to master mind. She gets pissed with Janelles indifference, she gets pissed with Christine's jealous and unaccepting behavior. She thinks that everything is perfect living in one big house as one big family, but then hears otherwise over time.  Her "perfect Christmas" shit is just bizarre.  She chooses a family of chaos and then thinks that she can make it all perfect Norman Rockwell for herself.  10 years in she has her own 12 piece matched luggage set with Kody and the wives and this season the cracks are showing.  If all of this stuff we have seen so far is from the move in summer 2018 to Feb 2019. We are on the cusp of what made Robyn snap and close the Closet and disappear from social media.

...oh! And yes, I agree that Kody is just as miserable as the rest of them.  He is tired of herding cats that don't listen to him, he isn't in control of, doesn't get constant adoring attention from, and there just isn't enough chaos from little children keeping him occupied.  Now he has to actually deal with those women and the endless boxes of baggage packed over 30 years. Now they don't have little children to focus on, they turn to expect more and more from Kody (except Robyn who will keep those kids glued to her house if she has to make sure the house has a really really big attic to lock them away)

[Kyanight]

1 hour ago, Roslyn said:

I can see Meri going into it with the attitude of "I want the man enough to agree to polygamy" and since she was raised in it, then thinking that as the first wife she will somehow have a say in the women who follow. And just maybe...he will wake up and realize she is all he needs.... She is obviously very fussy about how her domain is set up.  Furniture just so, cups in the cabinet just so, towels folded and placed just so.  So, yea...she wants to be sure she has control over the domain no matter who is coming in. We all know how well THAT worked out for them with Janelle.

I call bullshit on the beginning of the show when they said Meri was responsible for bringing the others in. They blew that theory in their book. While I think that Meri thought she could train the others to do it her way, the fact that they started churning out babies while she didn't had to have cut her deep. Then Janelle and Christine getting along and Kody busy with work and babies leaves Meri on the outside looking in. Mariah kept her just enough inside the circle.

Christine is and always has been a hot mess. Raised in a "bubble of fear" and to this day is emotionally immature. Seemingly clueless about the heartbreak of polygamy, thinking she has it all figured out by entering as that third wife.  That way she doesn't have to do any "real" work, just blend in with what everyone else is doing, she has the hots for Kody (they all do 🙄) and then churn out babies and play happy family with all the children. She kept her delusion up for many years until Robyn shattered it and Christine had to actually realize she is only a cog in the wheel. Especially only a piece of the whole to Kody...

Robyn is interesting.  She is letting a few tidbits fall this season about how she had plenty of prospects for marriage back in the day, but she only wanted polygamy. She wants the "perfect" polygamist family, she thought she found it with the Browns because they all lived as one big family instead of separate ones. Or so she thought.  I can't believe in knowing them, and then a 10 month engagement that she never knew they moved as often as they did. She wanted her kids to be incorporated into the family and accepted as one of them, and I'll bet dollars to donuts that she made that very clear to Kody.  He was very protective of her kids and fought against the wives' belief that Robyn the girlfriend didn't deserve equal time as they got. She was on that "this is what perfect polygamy is supposed to be...and YOU BROWNS are gonna give it to me."

Maybe another family would have put up with her, but from other polygamist stories, not her kids.  There is plenty out there to say that "sister wives" take out their frustrations on the children.  Robyn is a helicopter mom. She wants that perfect family and she learned "Kody communication" to guide him to shape her perfect family.  Playing that quiet damsel in distress and "obeying" and "needing" and "never going against his wishes" crap is just that.  Manipulative crap. She gets pissed that they all don't jump into her business idea.  She gets pissed that Meri is going to school because it takes her away from the Perfect Family that Robyn is trying to master mind. She gets pissed with Janelles indifference, she gets pissed with Christine's jealous and unaccepting behavior. She thinks that everything is perfect living in one big house as one big family, but then hears otherwise over time.  Her "perfect Christmas" shit is just bizarre.  She chooses a family of chaos and then thinks that she can make it all perfect Norman Rockwell for herself.  10 years in she has her own 12 piece matched luggage set with Kody and the wives and this season the cracks are showing.  If all of this stuff we have seen so far is from the move in summer 2018 to Feb 2019. We are on the cusp of what made Robyn snap and close the Closet and disappear from social media.

...oh! And yes, I agree that Kody is just as miserable as the rest of them.  He is tired of herding cats that don't listen to him, he isn't in control of, doesn't get constant adoring attention from, and there just isn't enough chaos from little children keeping him occupied.  Now he has to actually deal with those women and the endless boxes of baggage packed over 30 years. Now they don't have little children to focus on, they turn to expect more and more from Kody (except Robyn who will keep those kids glued to her house if she has to make sure the house has a really really big attic to lock them away)

Great post!  I would only add one thing:  I think that Robyn was also drawn into THIS particular family versus any other because of the Reality TV show.  When the fans didn't respond as THEY should have (that control thing you were talking about) she got frustrated and wasn't interested anymore, yet it's the major source of income for the family.  I don't believe Janelle and Christine were even given a say as to whether Robyn was joining the family or not - she WAS joining - TLC was interested - Meri was ok with it and Meri was the first wife, after all.  I would have to watch that first season again, but as I recall there was NOTHING to indicate to me that they were welcoming this with open arms.  

And it's Robyn's way, ALL the way.  She demands it - she gets it.  That has been Robyn since she was a child.

Edited February 5, 2020 by Kyanight

[DakotaJustice]

I feel badly for Dayton. He's being manipulated by his mom and I would guess that she's been using having a "special needs child" as an excuse to get what she wants. He seems to be capable of being independent, yet she's planning him to stay for the Long haul while Kody's other sons are encouraged to leave the nest as soon as possible.  

[Kyanight]

2 minutes ago, DakotaJustice said:

I feel badly for Dayton. He's being manipulated by his mom and I would guess that she's been using having a "special needs child" as an excuse to get what she wants. He seems to be capable of being independent, yet she's planning him to stay for the Long haul while Kody's other sons are encouraged to leave the nest as soon as possible.  

AND daughters.  

[DakotaJustice]

5 minutes ago, Kyanight said:

AND daughters.  

Yeah but they can get married. She's not going to even give Dayton the opportunity to meet anyone, he'll be there until she dies. 

 

ETA - sorry I misunderstood! I thought you were referring to Robyn's daughters.

Edited February 5, 2020 by DakotaJustice