S06.E14: Sex, Lies & Facials

[Lola16]

Avery takes a driving lesson.  Sonja goes commando.  Aviva talks about her pervy father again.

It's also the return of Krazy Kelly.

[Lucygirl2]

I don't know why they are attempting to be sly, like we wouldn't recognize that stringy hair & those linebacker shoulders & not know it is cuckoo Kelly.

I bet Miss USA is thrilled to be named as a 3some participant with Cryptkeeper George & his "fiancé" on national TV. For fuck sake, Aviva, not everyone wants their business put on blast! Especially if it isn't true...

[Persnickety1]

I'm really glad I watch this on the DVR so I can fast forward through anything to do with George on the upcoming episode.  I just can't deal with that twisted wooden-toothed weasel after last week's episode.  

[Lola16]

Sonja returns after storming out of LuAnn's rental house in Saratoga.  As punishment for ditching her at the track, Sonja eats cheese and unleashes a silent but deadly upon the other housewives.  (I think my brother wrote this script.)

[CousinAmy]

And Sonja hits Saratoga's nightlife in a nightie.

[LotusFlower]

Sonja throw tantrums for attention. But when they ignore her, she stops with the drama queen antics. I kinda like that strategy.

Aviva drops the 411 on Miss USA having a threesome with her father and the fake fiancé. Yea right. She's a friigin' beaury queen - what on earth would she be doing with a disgusting 85 year old geezer and a famewhore with tacky nails? Totally contrived b.s. story from Aviva. I bet George and Cody don't even show up - more proof that Aviva just uses her pervert father as a storyline prop. I hate that family and want them off my tv!

[Lablover27]

I just couldn't imagine my 15 year old daughter watching her mother spreading the legs and trying to kiss her show BFF.  Her and the driver scene was everything I did in high school.  I like Heather, but, her "baby girl" slang drives me nuts.  

 

What a hot mess Sonja is.  Sonja, not with a sexy J, Sonja with gas and antibiotics.  How does her liver still work?

 

And yes, the surprise guest is KooKooKelly.  It would have better if the surprise guest was Mario's ho on the side.

Edited June 6, 2014 by Lablover27

[hoodooznoodooz]

Interesting that Ramona's place card was handwritten. Or was it Sonja's? One was definitely HW and the other printed.

Did Sonja fart while Morgan was nearby?

I guess I'm the only idiot who didn't realize that was insane Kelly.

Andy the Driver is the perfect straight man to Sonja's babbling and lack of filter.

How did Avery turn out so normal?

Although her declaring that she only feels comfortable driving their BMW is going to rub some people the wrong way.

Edited June 6, 2014 by hoodooznoodooz

[Lucygirl2]

I don't think much of Avery only feeling comfy driving their car whether it is a BMW or not, my son did most of his learning in my car & it took a while before he was comfortable driving my husband's truck.  Now he can drive anything.

 

I don't think Sonja was "commando" in her tiny shirt dress.  For a brief moment the pixelating got messed up & I saw white underwear.  Anyone else?  I think Bravo took an opportunity to make us wonder, besides, it fits with Sonja's tagline.

[bosawks]

I don't think Sonja was "commando" in her tiny shirt dress.

 

 

For whatever reason I think "commando" is Sonja's baseline.....

[Lola16]

Avery said 'BMW' in a snotty tone of voice.  Apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  She'll learn.  Hopefully.

 

LuAnn was very good natured with sloshed Sonja slobbering all over her.  I can't stand sloppy drunks.  I guess they were glad she wasn't the angry drunk anymore.  Wonder if old man Morgan uses any of this show in the custody battle?

[MatildaMoody]

 

Wonder if old man Morgan uses any of this show in the custody battle?

I wasn't aware that there was a custody battle. I thought custody between Sonja and the Ex was completely settled. 

[Trooper York]

Talk about your sexual harassment. Sonja put old handsy George to shame by the way she went after the Countess.

 

Maybe she really thinks she has a penis?

[Grneyedldy]

I don't think much of Avery only feeling comfy driving their car whether it is a BMW or not, my son did most of his learning in my car & it took a while before he was comfortable driving my husband's truck.  Now he can drive anything.

 

I don't think Sonja was "commando" in her tiny shirt dress.  For a brief moment the pixelating got messed up & I saw white underwear.  Anyone else?  I think Bravo took an opportunity to make us wonder, besides, it fits with Sonja's tagline.

  

I saw the white panties too. And once again what a tease Bravo is with us thinking Sonja passed out on LuAnn's lap.

Avery said 'BMW' in a snotty tone of voice.  Apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  She'll learn.  Hopefully.

 

LuAnn was very good natured with sloshed Sonja slobbering all over her.  I can't stand sloppy drunks.  I guess they were glad she wasn't the angry drunk anymore.  Wonder if old man Morgan uses any of this show in the custody battle?

 

You could tell LuAnn felt uncomfortable, but she kept looking at the cameras and dealt with it. I bet it would have been a whole lot different sans cameras.

 

I don't know why they are attempting to be sly, like we wouldn't recognize that stringy hair & those linebacker shoulders & not know it is cuckoo Kelly. <snip>

Yeah like who else has linebacker shoulders, wonky boobs and looks like they swallowed a soap dish?

[Chit Chat]

I guess I'm the only idiot who didn't realize that was insane Kelly.

 

Don't feel bad. It didn't dawn on me either.  That's why I come here though!  I know that I can rely on others to pick up on the stuff I miss!

 

I like Heather, but, her "baby girl" slang drives me nuts.

I think that Heather says stuff like that to make it sound like she really cares, when she'd rather say something like "look dumbass, straighten up or get the hell out of here!"  I relate it to how us southerners will sometimes preface an insult with "well bless her heart!"  Somehow it just sounds more polite that way.

Edited June 6, 2014 by ChitChat

[RedheadZombie]

Avery said 'BMW' in a snotty tone of voice.  Apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  She'll learn.  Hopefully.

 

LuAnn was very good natured with sloshed Sonja slobbering all over her.  I can't stand sloppy drunks.  I guess they were glad she wasn't the angry drunk anymore.  Wonder if old man Morgan uses any of this show in the custody battle?

 

We assume old man Morgan even wants custody.  As far as we know, Morgan was done with children but Sonja had her to lock down that eighteen years of child support.  I feel sorry for the poor thing.  I don't care how common boarding school once was, to me it's an obvious way of handing over the hard work and responsibility, that go with having a child, to someone else.  As in love with Millou as Sonja was, it sounds like she took him everywhere because she couldn't stand to be parted from him.  Too bad she can't love her daughter as much as she loved her dog.

 

I'm willing to entertain the thought that Morgan insists the child go to boarding school (because that's how the upper crust does it), and Sonja compensates her loss with dozens of interns, a dog, and bottles of liquor.  That's what Brandi Glanville claims, and I believe it to a certain extent.

[Lola16]

We assume old man Morgan even wants custody.  As far as we know, Morgan was done with children but Sonja had her to lock down that eighteen years of child support.  I feel sorry for the poor thing.  I don't care how common boarding school once was, to me it's an obvious way of handing over the hard work and responsibility, that go with having a child, to someone else.  As in love with Millou as Sonja was, it sounds like she took him everywhere because she couldn't stand to be parted from him.  Too bad she can't love her daughter as much as she loved her dog.

 

I'm willing to entertain the thought that Morgan insists the child go to boarding school (because that's how the upper crust does it), and Sonja compensates her loss with dozens of interns, a dog, and bottles of liquor.  That's what Brandi Glanville claims, and I believe it to a certain extent.

I don't know that John Morgan wants to raise a child either but from all accounts he was a good father and perhaps he doesn't want her in a leaky old townhouse with no hot water.  I think it's best for Quincy (Quincy!) that she's not seen on TV and isn't subjected to all this.  LuAnn's kids were in boarding school as well.  I don't think it's so unusual.  In the 70-80s when I grew up, boarding school wasn't unusual.  I almost got sent away when my mom was considering remarrying.  Maybe it's an East Coast thing, it wasn't unusual.

 

Sonja herself blurted out earlier this season at Ramona about her custody battle so I'm guessing it's ongoing.  Sad.

[psychoticstate]

Wait.  What?  Quincy????

[ryebread]

Maybe it's an East Coast thing, it wasn't unusual. 

 

It's a money/status/generational thing.  I always thought 'boarding school' was a misnomer.  It should be 'elite country club for future titans of the universe school'.  Not unusual for the monied, especially the Europeans. 

[Mozelle]

It's a money/status/generational thing.  I always thought 'boarding school' was a misnomer.  It should be 'elite country club for future titans of the universe school'.  Not unusual for the monied, especially the Europeans. 

 

Or those wanting to be seen as "the Joneses." My mother has a cousin who put her son in a boarding school in Connecticut. The cousin and the cousin's husband live in Manhattan, rub elbows with the monied financial types, and have only been touring the name universities for the son who is set to graduate next spring. Yet several years back, the husband talked the cousin's parents into loaning a nice chunk of change for some business venture that fell all the way through.

 

We assume old man Morgan even wants custody.  As far as we know, Morgan was done with children but Sonja had her to lock down that eighteen years of child support.  I feel sorry for the poor thing.  I don't care how common boarding school once was, to me it's an obvious way of handing over the hard work and responsibility, that go with having a child, to someone else.  As in love with Millou as Sonja was, it sounds like she took him everywhere because she couldn't stand to be parted from him.  Too bad she can't love her daughter as much as she loved her dog.

 

I'm willing to entertain the thought that Morgan insists the child go to boarding school (because that's how the upper crust does it), and Sonja compensates her loss with dozens of interns, a dog, and bottles of liquor.  That's what Brandi Glanville claims, and I believe it to a certain extent.

 

The bloom is off the rose as far as Sonja is concerned. I'm a bit shocked at how delusional she's been this season, and she's been saying some pretty off the wall stuff. That said, I don't think it's fair to assume that Sonja doesn't love her daughter as much as she loved Millou. I think that Sonja loves her little girl very much. That we don't see her on TV doesn't tell me anything except maybe that Old Man Morgan doesn't want the girl on this show. That the little girl is away at boarding school seems to me more like the parents keeping up with the idea that only the elite and the best of the best get top notch educations at some storied boarding school.

 

I do recall seeing the daughter in a clip on some YouTube video back when last season was airing and Sonja was hawking her toaster. Sonja was at Macy's (I think) giving a demo on how to roast asparagus in a toaster oven, and her daughter was her assistant for the demo. It seems to me that when she can have her daughter phsyically in her presence, Sonja does.

[Lola16]

It's a money/status/generational thing.  I always thought 'boarding school' was a misnomer.  It should be 'elite country club for future titans of the universe school'.  Not unusual for the monied, especially the Europeans. 

I was excited to go.  In my 7 year old head, I thought I'd be riding horses all day long.

[CousinAmy]

@psychoticstate, Morgan is descended from the famous John Adams family as well as the Morgans, so I assume that's how Quincy was named.

[jvr]

Yea, my first thought was John Quincy Adams when I heard the daughters name...just a family name.

[psychoticstate]

@CousinAmy - thank you for the info!

[motorcitymom65]

I don't know that John Morgan wants to raise a child either but from all accounts he was a good father and perhaps he doesn't want her in a leaky old townhouse with no hot water.  I think it's best for Quincy (Quincy!) that she's not seen on TV and isn't subjected to all this.  LuAnn's kids were in boarding school as well.  I don't think it's so unusual.  In the 70-80s when I grew up, boarding school wasn't unusual.  I almost got sent away when my mom was considering remarrying.  Maybe it's an East Coast thing, it wasn't unusual.

 

Sonja herself blurted out earlier this season at Ramona about her custody battle so I'm guessing it's ongoing.  Sad.

I have always assumed that the old man didn't want custody, because if he did, surely Sonja with a sexy J has given him what he would need to secure it. I know she is away at boarding school much of the time, but when she is not she apparently lives in Grey Gardens with numerous random interns wondering around. I cannot imagine thinking that this was a good environment for my daughter to be in. Then of course there is the deal with having no hot water. This is just one small step above being homeless, and I cannot imagine that if he wanted to make an issue out of it, he couldn't do so easily. 

[MatildaMoody]

 

know she is away at boarding school much of the time, but when she is not she apparently lives in Grey Gardens with numerous random interns wondering around. I cannot imagine thinking that this was a good environment for my daughter to be in. Then of course there is the deal with having no hot water.

 

The hot water thing is a misdirect. Apparently, according to some of her interns, there is hot water in the house, Sonja just keeps the temperature turned down on the hot water heater. Apparently, she started doing it when her daughter was really young to prevent her from getting burned. But, continued doing it when she saw how much money it saved. So, Sonja has hot water she just has to adjust her hot water heater to access it.

[Tara Ariano]

What episode are you talking about? There is no episode on tonight. If this is all discussion of the 6/3 episode, there's a thread for that.

[Tara Ariano]

A Saratoga trip ends with a wives-gone-wild night on the town. Later, Ramona bonds with Avery before her college departure; Sonja's facialist spreads gossip to Kristen; LuAnn throws a charity auction; and Aviva hosts an art party.

[Grneyedldy]

What episode are you talking about? There is no episode on tonight. If this is all discussion of the 6/3 episode, there's a thread for that.

This thread is for the First Look of tomorrow's episode.

[Tara Ariano]

In that case: merged threads. All discussion of 06-14 can go here.

[jaync]

 I bet it would have been a whole lot different sans cameras.

Yeah, LuAnn might have kissed Sonja back.

[FlyingEgret]

Andy the Driver is the perfect straight man to Sonja's babbling

Can Andy be in all the shows? Please?

[rosered]

Right! Kelly is a hot pooty tang MESS! And Sonja looks like she smells like FISH! UGH!!!

[OFDgal]

@psychoticstate, Morgan is descended from the famous John Adams family as well as the Morgans, so I assume that's how Quincy was named.

I think that Sonja is from an old Boston family.  Tremont St in Boston is named for her family. But I think she grew up in upstate New York. Not positive but I believe I read that somewhere.

[bosawks]

Kelly and Aviva together is such a vortex of crazy I'm surprised my TV didn't implode.

[motorcitymom65]

I cannot believe the conversation I just saw Ramona have with that girl. Those folks thought she was a loon.

[shoegal]

I'm going to have nightmares about Krazy Kelly in that mask.

[parisprincess]

Ooooh, I love that we can discuss the show while its on!  Ramona never disappoints; leave it to her to hightail it right over the Miss USA to get the real story about the supposed three-way.  And Aviva didn't disappoint either; she loves pointing out what a disgusting father she has, as if its something to be proud of.     

[LilaFowler]

I think that Sonja is from an old Boston family.  Tremont St in Boston is named for her family. But I think she grew up in upstate New York. Not positive but I believe I read that somewhere.

From Tremont Street's Wikipedia entry: The name is a variation of one of the original appellations of the city, "Trimountaine," a reference to a hill that formerly had three peaks.

 

Though, I'm sure Sonja would love for everyone to think that she comes from an old family.

 

A $500 throw pillow?  I've seen similar-looking pillows at Target.

[OFDgal]

Well, Aviva just threw Heather under the bus, saying that she passed the text around.

[Chicklet]

Oh man you know I have OD'd on this "format"(for lack of a better descriptor) when all I can do it roll my eyes when Woman A brings up a contentious and nasty deed to Woman B and a loud and not classy argument happens. Though Lou gives as good as she gets and does it with class. Aviva not so much. Avivia treats people she's screaming at like one of her children "LOOK AT ME". Lord woman dial it down a few notches.

[OFDgal]

From Tremont Street's Wikipedia entry: The name is a variation of one of the original appellations of the city, "Trimountaine," a reference to a hill that formerly had three peaks.

 

Though, I'm sure Sonja would love for everyone to think that she comes from an old family.

 

A $500 throw pillow?  I've seen similar-looking pillows at Target.

oh, thanks.  I probably read it in some not so accurate site.

[BusyOctober]

Sonja's maiden name is Tremont, but her family is not connected to the Tremont St. In. Boston. The street got its name because in colonial times the area of Beacon Hill originally was a large hill with 3 peaks, or "tri-mountaine". It eventually morphed into Tremont.

J. Morgan does have ties to Boston since he was a great great great grandson of John Quincy Adams.

That said, Quincy has the illustrious old money Morgan name and all the staid old world elegance that one associates with it on one side and then sloppy drunk, aging party girl on the other. Boarding school is probably safest place for the girl til she is 18 and gets her trust fund cash to move on her own.

[FlyingEgret]

How embarrassing that Ramona confronted ex-Miss USA in front of a table of friends but she seems so sweet that I'm sure the producers wanted to leave no doubt in anyone's mind that Aviva, Cody and George are the crazy ones

[Rhetorica]

Gawd...every one of these women are cra-zee. When KKB is the sanest of the episode, we know the franchise is in trouble. 

If Sonja isn't playing a part, she needs to be off TV for the sake of her daughter.

Carol is now offended by George after asking him about squirting orgasms last week? 

Aviva would be nothing without her vile father. All she does is scream and deflect.

Ramona has balls to speak to Miss pageant whoever.

Kristen is such a troublemaker. She loves to be involved and spread all the rumors.

LuAnn is tolerable this year. 

[motorcitymom65]

I love Heather more than any other HW ever, but I was disappointed that she passed around the text, and don't understand why Lu wasn't at all mad at her. From the shot we saw of Lu looking out at the table, Heather was the one laughing and it and appeared being the loudest. I get that Aviva is the bad guy in most every scenario (cannot stand her), but if you are going to be mad at the display at that table, the blame needs to be shared.

[Rhetorica]

I love Heather more than any other HW ever, but I was disappointed that she passed around the text, and don't understand why Lu wasn't at all mad at her. From the shot we saw of Lu looking out at the table, Heather was the one laughing and it and appeared being the loudest. I get that Aviva is the bad guy in most every scenario (cannot stand her), but if you are going to be mad at the display at that table, the blame needs to be shared.

I thought the same thing! And her excuse was, "Well, I asked you if I could pass it around." And didn't she ask several times?

[MyAimIsTrue]

What is with Aviva's hair?  The color reminds me of a dead body when it turns gray-ish and she obviously has extensions or some sort of weave as they show through terribly, especially from the back.

[jnymph]

WTF was Aviva wearing at the charity event?

THAT was hideous.

Edited June 11, 2014 by jnymph

[JAYJAY1979]

I'm wondering why the drama can't happen more organically, or at least be a better balance between organic and scripted.

 

It seems like Kristen, Luann, Carole, Heather, and sometimes Sonja seem to enjoy each other's company.  I'd rather watch them having wine, gossiping, eating pizza, and playing games over stupid drama.  I liked last season better since it seemed more natural and less staged conflict.