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Jenelle: Birther Of 3, Mother To None

DangerousMinds

By DangerousMinds
in Teen Mom 2

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Everyone knows Ensley does not have Down syndrome. Posts suggesting that she does will be removed and warnings issued. Posts such as these leave the impression that an arguably unflattering picture could somehow be construed as a child being disabled is considered ableist and is against the rules of the board.

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politichick
politichick

Not to mention how Leah has probably accelerated Ali's physical decline because she refuses to follow the fucking rules regarding the wheel chair and physical activity. Barb has made sure that Ja

Kareny
Kareny

Maryssa is free! Hallelujah. Two down, two to go.

Uncle JUICE
Uncle JUICE

Look, who are we to judge? Look, if you're married for any amount of time, or really in any sort of regular, healthy relationship, who among you HASN'T threatened their significant other with posting

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ghoulina

ghoulina

20 hours ago, druzy said:

This is the picture Jenelle deleted because of the comments about Ensley's head and the gun UBT's pocket.

je.jpg

David also looks like he's been on a week-long bender in these pics. His eyes. Uffdah!

52 minutes ago, leighroda said:

Any teenager who is a lifeguard can also tread water for 10 minutes, after swimming a mile...without stopping. 

Did I miss the “water treading” portion of the olympics when she got her medal?

Treading water is what she's been doing in that relationship for the past 10 years (I do Jenelle math). 

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Birdee

Birdee

3 hours ago, MyPeopleAreNordic said:

Seeing David walking around with a gun tucked in his pants reminds me of ex-NFL player Plaxico Burress accidentally shooting himself in the leg (which basically ended his promising career).  Plaxico was at a nightclub. He had his gun in his waistband.  He tripped going up some stairs and the gun fell, went off, and shot into his leg. 

https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/ex-receiver-plaxico-burress-finally-explains-how-he-shot-himself-in-the-leg-at-a-club/

I would be exactly 0% sad if David shot off "Little David" and took himself out of the gene pol.

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Rebecca

Rebecca

(edited)
9 hours ago, dabronx said:

Former certified rescue scuba diver here. My two cents is that anyone’s who gets their scuba diver certification and does not   feel it’s an accomplishment is probably someone who didn’t pay very close attention or take the safety and classroom portions of the course  too seriously and is frankly not someone I’d want to be diving with. There are briefer courses that people take on vacation to go out for a short dive but if Janelle completed her full certification than yes it’s an accomplishment. Janelle can be a wretched human and still have things to be proud of that us “normals” would be proud of too. Taking her scuba course seriously and being proud of that is a good example. Marrying David and being proud of THAT? Not so much........

You really think Jenelle took it super seriously? You’d dive with her? There’s a BIG DIFFERENCE between what you’re describing versus what Jenelle “accomplished.” Plus, I’m pretty sure you don’t go on twitter arguing with people about how haaaard treading water for 10 mins is and how no one else can do it. Don’t see anything about her being a rescue diver. I want to see the receipts that she took some big, comprehensive course.

I’m a certified lifeguard. If I was Jenelle I’d be going around saying I save lies and bragging about the “accomplishment” because it would be all I had to brag about if I was Jenelle. Lots of things are technically accomplishments but they really mean nothing to anyone else and really, really mean nothing when you’re shit at everything important, like Jenelle.

Edited by Rebecca
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lovesnark

lovesnark

7 hours ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

I always thought SCUBA diving in the ocean would be cool, but never got beyond the "imagining" part.  But when it comes to Janelle and her pool, all I can think of is Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate. 

 

Yes!!! That's exactly what I was thinking. Her all geared up in the pool and Lurch dropping random shit into the water for her to "discover". ?

 

9 hours ago, dabronx said:

Former certified rescue scuba diver here. My two cents is that anyone’s who gets their scuba diver certification and does not   feel it’s an accomplishment is probably someone who didn’t pay very close attention or take the safety and classroom portions of the course  too seriously and is frankly not someone I’d want to be diving with. There are briefer courses that people take on vacation to go out for a short dive but if Janelle completed her full certification than yes it’s an accomplishment. Janelle can be a wretched human and still have things to be proud of that us “normals” would be proud of too. Taking her scuba course seriously and being proud of that is a good example. Marrying David and being proud of THAT? Not so much........

I believe Jenelle did a vacation scuba course in St Thomas. As far as we know, she's never done any diving stateside. She was tweeting about being excited for her pool to be ready #scuba. The image of her diving in the pool cracks me up!

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dabronx

dabronx

10 minutes ago, lovesnark said:

Yes!!! That's exactly what I was thinking. Her all geared up in the pool and Lurch dropping random shit into the water for her to "discover". ?

 

I believe Jenelle did a vacation scuba course in St Thomas. As far as we know, she's never done any diving stateside. She was tweeting about being excited for her pool to be ready #scuba. The image of her diving in the pool cracks me up!

If Janelle received enriched air certification than as a pre-requisite she’d have to have her open water certifications which is different to the basic scuba diver course that is typical of quick training on vacay which allows you to be a supervised diver.  Open water certification allows you to be unsupervised diver. 

All I’m saying is go ahead and knock Janelle for her treading water lunacy, knock her for her horrid life choices etc etc but there’s no reason to diminish or downplay what it means to have accomplished open water scuba certification or the enriched air certification to knock her. Does having it make anyone super special? Is it Einstein level math or seal team six level training? No - but it does take enough brain power and commitment to be an accomplishment. 

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rhofmovalley

rhofmovalley

11 hours ago, MyPeopleAreNordic said:

Oh, I agree, @GreatKazu.  My guess is Maryssa is a bully because she sees her dad and stepmom treating the boys (or at least Kaiser) like that.  Hell, they probably even treat Maryssa like that. Being raised nearly full-time by Jenelle and David has got to be a mind f&%# and she surely sees/hears a lot of violence and then does what sees being modeled. That's no excuse for her being a bully or physically harming anyone, though.  That said, I still think she's more likely to notice if the boys accidentally get in the pool unattended than UBT & Jenelle...and I'd trust her to give me CPR over Jenelle & UBT...

Seeing David walking around with a gun tucked in his pants reminds me of ex-NFL player Plaxico Burress accidentally shooting himself in the leg (which basically ended his promising career).  Plaxico was at a nightclub. He had his gun in his waistband.  He tripped going up some stairs and the gun fell, went off, and shot into his leg. 

https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/ex-receiver-plaxico-burress-finally-explains-how-he-shot-himself-in-the-leg-at-a-club/

Best part of that was, Burress went to prison for that!

 

Can you imagine those prison yard conversations? "So, Burress, what're you in for?" "A shooting!" "Man! Who'd you shoot?" "Myself." "Ummm...badass??"

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LegallyRed2

LegallyRed2

My 9 year old son can tread water for 10 minutes easy. He could probably do it for a lot longer.  Lanna11 who commented on Janelle's thread is absolutely right. The YMCA requires a 2 minute water tread to allow kids to get their 'green bracelets' to be able to swim in the pool without an adult. It's harder to run 6.0 for 10 minutes than it is to tread water. #truestory

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pheebs

pheebs

17 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

I can see it now. David is going to pull that shit like that newlywed husband who went scuba diving with his bride on their honeymoon and she ended up "drowning".

Can I tell a true story? In our little midwestern town, a "Big Name" rich guy married the older sister of one of my friends. They were giant coke fiends and she started to get on his nerves, so he started an affair with a Scuba/Fitness Instructor/gym addict type girl. The husband basically made my Friend's sister get cold water/dive rescue certified and participate in dives (she wasn't really interested) and one January night they were drinking. He proposed loudly to all the bar patrons that "We're driving across the Lake to get home so we won't get busted for drunk driving." It wasn't a harsh winter, so the ice was iffy. He drove (whoops!) into open water and the vehicle sunk. He then managed to get out of the flooded vehicle - (How lucky was that! Thank goodness He was certified!) and walked to his lawyer's house on the lake and didn't bother to report the "accident" for hours.

Of, course, He didn't. It was because He was so "rattled" it didn't even occur to him to call the authorities. Or, needed time to sober up. Or time to change out of his DrySuit for cold water diving He had under his clothes. Nah, he was just too shaken up to call - (from his lawyer's house.)

She was found the next morning by Dive Rescue still buckled in. His window was open (must have needed that fresh air while driving!) Annnd...He got off scott free.

He married the Scuba/Fitness Instructor six weeks later in an underwater ceremony in the Caribbean, wearing Scuba gear. As you do.

Back on topic, Janelle sux.

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GreatKazu

GreatKazu

24 minutes ago, pheebs said:

Can I tell a true story? In our little midwestern town, a "Big Name" rich guy married the older sister of one of my friends. They were giant coke fiends and she started to get on his nerves, so he started an affair with a Scuba/Fitness Instructor/gym addict type girl. The husband basically made my Friend's sister get cold water/dive rescue certified and participate in dives (she wasn't really interested) and one January night they were drinking. He proposed loudly to all the bar patrons that "We're driving across the Lake to get home so we won't get busted for drunk driving." It wasn't a harsh winter, so the ice was iffy. He drove (whoops!) into open water and the vehicle sunk. He then managed to get out of the flooded vehicle - (How lucky was that! Thank goodness He was certified!) and walked to his lawyer's house on the lake and didn't bother to report the "accident" for hours.

Of, course, He didn't. It was because He was so "rattled" it didn't even occur to him to call the authorities. Or, needed time to sober up. Or time to change out of his DrySuit for cold water diving He had under his clothes. Nah, he was just too shaken up to call - (from his lawyer's house.)

She was found the next morning by Dive Rescue still buckled in. His window was open (must have needed that fresh air while driving!) Annnd...He got off scott free.

He married the Scuba/Fitness Instructor six weeks later in an underwater ceremony in the Caribbean, wearing Scuba gear. As you do.

Back on topic, Janelle sux.

?? 

He got away with murder??? ?

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pheebs

pheebs

1 minute ago, GreatKazu said:

He got away with murder??? ?

He sure did. His family owned the newspaper. The Scuba wife then had a fitness advice column in the paper for years. She was always going off about the "great need to have aerobic fitness."

And I always thought, "Of course you know the value of holding your breath."

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TexasGal

TexasGal

Y'all, I'm surprised they didn't see this and think it was a good idea to also have Eggsley try it.  If it weren't for you guys, I would have thought it WAS them before reading it but I know someone would have spilled the beans here before I ever saw it somewhere else!

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/true-crime/wp/2018/03/21/mother-arrested-after-viral-video-of-her-baby-smoking-sparks-outrage-on-social-media/?utm_term=.f3ebaccf3765

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monicageller

monicageller

On 3/21/2018 at 8:56 PM, CofCinci said:

Janelle acts as if her SCUBA “license” makes her a US Navy SEAL! Just like how she believes her strip mall medical assisting certificate is equivalent to a board-certified physician!! 

David Eason can’t hug the kids without having a fucking gun in his pocket?!

Yes, the Eagle tattoo is very similar to White Supremacy tattoos. 

But she is SAVING LIVES.

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CaliforniaLove

CaliforniaLove

Last night I was watching Wheel of Fortune, and at the end Vanna White was shilling for the Sandals Beach Resort in Turks & Caicos. She was talking about all the wonderful trips she has been on with her children & one of her selling points was that her teenage son got his SCUBA certification because they do it right there at the resort! "You can go to the water park, eat at the buffet, swim with dolphins, and get your SCUBA cert!". It must truly be difficult. *snerk*

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littleB1rdy

littleB1rdy

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You mean to tell me David goes on a scary, homophobic rant on Twitter and gets fired from his wife’s “job” the day before his day in court for custody over his son and yet still gets to keep custody. 

 

But super dad Jo had to go above and beyond and please the Hulk just to see his son? 

What the hell is going on?

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Maharincess

Maharincess

(edited)

To me, it looks like Maryssa is trying to figure out the easiest way to snap her neck. 

Poor little Kaden,  he's probably seen these people a handful of times in his life and now he's going to be thrown in the kid pile for whole weekends. He doesn't know these people and he's only 4!  I feel so bad for him.  I agree that Jenelle will be jealous of any attention that is given to Kaden.  That poor baby is going to go through he'll in that house. 

Edited by Maharincess
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GreatKazu

GreatKazu

(edited)
13 minutes ago, FlowerofCarnage said:

I think Maryssa has taken it upon herself to try to fix Endtable's head.

hahaha

I think she is actually molding it so it looks more elongated. Maryssa does not want any competition. She will throw Eggsley around in no time, just like she tosses around Kaiser and Jace. Just wait. 

6 minutes ago, Maharincess said:

To me, it looks like Maryssa is trying to figure out the easiest way to snap her neck. 

 

Hell yes!!! Remember when Gracie was considered the evil child? Maryssa has taken the crown. 

Edited by GreatKazu
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Guest

Everyone knows Ensley does not have Down syndrome. Posts suggesting that she does will be removed and warnings issued. Posts such as these leave the impression that an arguably unflattering picture could somehow be construed as a child being disabled is considered ableist and is against the rules of the board.

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