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Jenelle: Birther Of 3, Mother To None

DangerousMinds

By DangerousMinds
in Teen Mom 2

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Everyone knows Ensley does not have Down syndrome. Posts suggesting that she does will be removed and warnings issued. Posts such as these leave the impression that an arguably unflattering picture could somehow be construed as a child being disabled is considered ableist and is against the rules of the board.

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leighroda

leighroda

15 minutes ago, poopchute said:

Lol that is the dumbest picture I've ever seen.  David looks the best he's ever looked though since all we can see is his hair.

You literally took the words out of my mouth...before I scrolled to comments I just stared and said to myself "this is the dumbest birth announcement picture ever". I don't get it, if your going to take a picture in the tub at least have the baby with you, it looks ridiculous with just Jenelle in the tub. If I didn't know immediately it was them I would have thought this was a spoof.  Other than the crown/clothes it totally does not come off as being related to the pregnancy announcement. I just can't.

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politichick
politichick

Not to mention how Leah has probably accelerated Ali's physical decline because she refuses to follow the fucking rules regarding the wheel chair and physical activity. Barb has made sure that Ja

Kareny
Kareny

Maryssa is free! Hallelujah. Two down, two to go.

Uncle JUICE
Uncle JUICE

Look, who are we to judge? Look, if you're married for any amount of time, or really in any sort of regular, healthy relationship, who among you HASN'T threatened their significant other with posting

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Maharincess

Maharincess

The comments under that picture make me weep. People saying what a "great mommy" she is and saying that David is such a "great, wonderful guy" and they're proud of how far Jenelle has come.   These people are joking right?  Please tell me they're just messing around.  They can't really mean these things can they??

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SPLAIN

SPLAIN

3 hours ago, CofCinci said:

When did Jenelle become a Jewish mother -- further, a progressive feminist pseudo-orthodox  traditionalist Jewish mother?  She's doing Mikveh photos! Trendy trainhopper has no idea. 

Bwahahahaha... like this?

 

bathtub.jpg

I imagine UBD doing this in the future except his hand is over Janelle's face as he pushes her down.

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lexiexx

lexiexx

4 hours ago, ghoulina said:

LOL, what the fuck is going on in that picture? Jenelle is some sort of water nymph who just chills in her bathtub while the resident serial killer does all the heavy lifting?

I'm so confused. I've never wanted to sit in my bathtub with clothing on. The water looks like someone put milk in it. Is this how they feed Kaiser now? Just  a trough of Cheerios, self service style? 

And I know I've NEVER wanted to teeter on the tiny edge of a tub with no elbow support when trying to feed a tiny newborn. 

Egads

Is her photographer some person she used to do drugs with?

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jadecorleone

jadecorleone

Correct me if Im wrong, but I dont recall her doing shoots like this with either Jace or Kaiser. Im thinking she only kept trying because she wanted a girl and now that she has one, Jace and Kaiser wont see her for dust. Which at this point I think would be for the best.

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Uncle JUICE

Uncle JUICE

9 hours ago, jadecorleone said:

Correct me if Im wrong, but I dont recall her doing shoots like this with either Jace or Kaiser. Im thinking she only kept trying because she wanted a girl and now that she has one, Jace and Kaiser wont see her for dust. Which at this point I think would be for the best.

She also had those children when she was poor. Now she has a little money. 

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poopchute

poopchute

5 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

She also had those children when she was poor. Now she has a little money. 

That's true, but I still think this is kind of shitty.  What does she do, display these in her home and say to her other kids sorry no pics of you but here are these professional photos of the daughter I always wanted!  Maybe the whole family should be in the shots and it wouldn't annoy me as much.

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Uncle JUICE

Uncle JUICE

Just now, poopchute said:

That's true, but I still think this is kind of shitty.  What does she do, display these in her home and say to her other kids sorry no pics of you but here are these professional photos of the daughter I always wanted!  Maybe the whole family should be in the shots and it wouldn't annoy me as much.

Oh, no question, it's shitty in a hundred ways, but part if that shittiness is that she doesn't even REALIZE it's shitty. And in fairness, it's just impossible to get all of these custody arrangements to line up so that everyone can be in it...though I am smiling thinking about all  4 kids, 3 baby daddies, and Meme, standing in a milk filled bathtub up to their knees. 

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sunsheyen

sunsheyen

6 minutes ago, poopchute said:

Also I just realized the caption is pretty fucked up too.

That was my first thought when I saw this pic. Second was to LOL at the strategically placed leaves in the tub. 

So Jace and Kaiser ain't shit, Endtable is best thing she's ever done? God, what a garbage person to leave them out like that. There are a million other ways she could've worded that to show love for the little girl without excluding the other two she's birthed.

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ChocolateAddict

ChocolateAddict

Did the f*cking bitch need to use the word "favourite"?  I guess you might as well be open about the fact that you don't really give a damn about your other two kids cause they have the wrong anatomy. 

Also, I feel that it is time for the annual "Oh my god Jenelle had another kid" thread name change! Someone a couple of pages back nominated "Birther of three, mother of none" which I feel would be rather appropriate (sorry whoever that was for stealing the idea!). 

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MissMel

MissMel

With all her talk about waiting to find out the gender, gender reveal, gender-gender-gender...  And now these pictures?  Yeah, now more than ever I'm convinced she was going to terminate if this baby was a boy.  No doubt in my mind.  I hope her daughter is as good to her as she is to her mother.  

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lovesnark

lovesnark

6 minutes ago, MissMel said:

With all her talk about waiting to find out the gender, gender reveal, gender-gender-gender...  And now these pictures?  Yeah, now more than ever I'm convinced she was going to terminate if this baby was a boy.  No doubt in my mind.  I hope her daughter is as good to her as she is to her mother.  

This x1000! I'm old and had my kids a long time ago. But, didn't she deliver doomed, little Endtable a couple weeks ago? Two weeks post partum, I still had a fair amount of post birth flow going on and was told not to take a tub bath for 4-6 weeks because it takes time for your cervix to get back to pre birth level of closed. All I can think of when I look at those pics is whether she's wearing rubber pants. And, the ridiculousness of it all. No one will EVER buy your earth mother routine, Jenelle. No matter how many flower crowns you slap on your caterpillar eyebrowed head.

I second changing the tread title. "Birther of three, mother to none" describes her perfectly.

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ghoulina

ghoulina

So the boys aren't works of art? Or they all are, but Ensley is her favorite? Fuck this bitch a hundred ways from Sunday. 

And yes, let's please change the thread title to Birther of Three, Mother of None. 

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lovesnark

lovesnark

8 minutes ago, TresGatos said:

The first photo made me think she was taking a sitz bath for her stitches but wearing clothes and (presumably) no underwear.

I won't go into graphic detail, but I had the episiotomy from hell after our son was born (30+ stitches). They sent me home with a shallow tray to fill with warm water that went on the toilet for sitz baths. The idea was to be able to soak but not to introduce bacteria like a tub bath would. But, who am I kidding. It's Jenelle. No way would she pass up the opportunity for a photo shoot!

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lovesnark

lovesnark

I'm procrastinating about going to the grocery store and running errands.  I started wondering about the  poor animals Jenelle has collected. Last season we saw the pit she's had for a couple years, the siamese mix kitten and a new pomeranian. The pom was a puppy and it was wearing a cone. She was cuddling it while Kaiser was trying to climb onto the couch for attention. A while ago, someone here posted a pic of Jenelle and Uncle Creepy posing with a pit that seems to be some weird new standard (really short legs and an enormous head and body - looks deformed to me) and thanking some kennel for selling them the dog. I don't see either one of them thinking boundaries like fences apply to them and that it's perfectly fine to let their dogs run wild on the property. We also know that Jenelle doesn't do shit for training and I can see Uncle Creepy thinking beating a dog into submission is the way to go. So, I wonder how long it will be before one of their dogs attacks someone now that they don't have a fenced yard to be trapped in 24/7?

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Trace

Trace

(edited)

Anyone want to join me on the subway to hell because I hope that baby crapped all over what's his name?? If there was a diaper, I didn't see it.

Edited by Trace
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lovesnark

lovesnark

6 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

Thanks mod for changing the title thread. :-)

Yes! It's so fitting! Shall we start a pool on how long it'll be until it needs to be changed to birther of 4? You just know Uncle Creepy is going to keep pushing for a son of his own (well, one he can have contact with)

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ktwo

ktwo

5 hours ago, poopchute said:

Also I just realized the caption is pretty fucked up too.

Yup. Not only does it imply that Endorsement is her favorite, but it's also a quote from "My Funny Valentine," a song I HATE because the lyrics are basically "you're ugly but I love you anyway."

And that #milkbath just makes it look like everyone's sitting in dirty bath water. Does it make me a bad person if I hope she gets an infection? Because she is totally not supposed to take baths this soon after delivering a baby.

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EmeraldGirl

EmeraldGirl

When the hell did she hear My Funny Valentine? Are she and Creepy groovin' to the standards in that bathtub? 

TMI: I wore hospital pads for weeks after giving birth. Maybe that water ended up striped like a candy cane (I'm sorry for that visual). 

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heatherchandler

heatherchandler

1 hour ago, ktwo said:

Yup. Not only does it imply that Endorsement is her favorite, but it's also a quote from "My Funny Valentine," a song I HATE because the lyrics are basically "you're ugly but I love you anyway."

 

She has to be stealing that quote, there is no way she heard the song and decided it fit.  Especially because if she did, it is part of an insult!

Your looks are laughable
Unphotographable
Yet you're my favorite work of art

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CofCinci

CofCinci

6 hours ago, MissMel said:

BWith all her talk about waiting to find out the gender, gender reveal, gender-gender-gender...  And now these pictures?  Yeah, now more than ever I'm convinced she was going to terminate if this baby was a boy.  No doubt in my mind.  I hope her daughter is as good to her as she is to her mother.  

She has before and she will again. David will want a son next, especially as he has referred to Jace and Kaiser as sissies. They aren't male in his eyes. I can only imagine the hateful words that come out of his mouth when the cameras aren't around.  David will want his son with Janelle to be hypermasculine.  No sissy milk bath photos for the infant. The son's first pics will be of him doing manly shit, like violating protective order and choking bitches. He'll probably get a name like Butchie or Bruiser. 

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GreatKazu

GreatKazu

1 hour ago, EmeraldGirl said:

When the hell did she hear My Funny Valentine? Are she and Creepy groovin' to the standards in that bathtub? 

TMI: I wore hospital pads for weeks after giving birth. Maybe that water ended up striped like a candy cane (I'm sorry for that visual). 

LMAO

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Jennifersdc

Jennifersdc

2 hours ago, GreatKazu said:

Only if he can have Dave as well.

That's really funny...

Though there is a small place in my cold dark heart (mostly when it comes to reality TV personalities) that has some sympathy for Jenelle. She obviously has mental issues. Being a total narcissistic, dick-obsessed asshole doesn't help though. Reminds me of Danielle Staub (except Danielle's a "better" mother). See cold dark heart.

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nightmeri

nightmeri

Janelle is a narcissist.  She wanted a daughter to have a "mini-me".  When end-table develops her own personality and refuses to submit to and worship Janelle, the milk bath will hit the fan.

signed, daughter of a narcissist 

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Christina87

Christina87

I've always thought it was weird that Jenelle wanted a girl so badly. Nothing in her personality screams "girly girl" to me. I could much sooner see her playing trains than barbies! I guess it is because there's nothing feminine about her, and her personality is so aggressive. Chelsea and Leah? I could see them cooing over a girl. Jenelle just seems like the type to gravitate to boys, and her being a narcissist seems like the best explanation of why she wants a girl!

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CofCinci

CofCinci

1 hour ago, Christina87 said:

I've always thought it was weird that Jenelle wanted a girl so badly. Nothing in her personality screams "girly girl" to me. I could much sooner see her playing trains than barbies! I guess it is because there's nothing feminine about her, and her personality is so aggressive. Chelsea and Leah? I could see them cooing over a girl. Jenelle just seems like the type to gravitate to boys, and her being a narcissist seems like the best explanation of why she wants a girl!

Chelsea has a girl; so of course Janelle wants one. 

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