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Brandi Glanville: Drinking and Tweeting - a book and a lifestyle!


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I skimmed through Brandi's book last night because I was thinking that's where I first  learned some Gerard Butler details. No luck so far, but I saw an interesting passage in the first chapter. Part of that chapter is available on the book's Amazon page. 

Excerpted from Drinking and Tweeting: And Other Brandi Blunders (2013)

Quote

 

It was a cold, sunny morning the day my world fell apart.

Sure. There were signs. Like, what man has baby wipes in the center console of his Porsche? Please, like he ever changed a diaper. It’s not a science, but I’m pretty certain my husband was getting more than his fair share of roadside assistance.

But, as the saying goes, ignorance is bliss: I had a beautiful, six-bedroom home in Calabasas, a full-time nanny, a brand-new Range Rover, an $11,500 boob job, two wonderful little boys, and a gorgeous Cuban husband. And I was the perfect little Hollywood housewife. Yes, the writing was on the wall that my husband was far from perfect, and, yes, every so often my curiosity would rear its head, but I chose to ignore it because life was good—plus, even if I believed it, I couldn’t prove a damn thing—in fact, it was great. So when reports of my husband’s infidelities became national news one fateful March morning, I was the lucky recipient of the world’s biggest gut punch. (Both Sandra Bullock and Elin Nordegren would soon follow my lead—let’s just say Eddie’s lucky his golf clubs weren’t handy.)

[snip]

Let's be clear, Eddie and I had an extremely healthy sex life (so where he got all that extra energy, I'll never be sure), but every so often we would run away together so we could make love in the middle of the afternoon as loud as we wanted. And he would kiss me the way he did when we had nothing but time. That, coupled with an occasional lesbian make-out, was the recipe for our seemingly successful marriage. I know what you're thinking: how was it okay for me to hook up with other women, but not my husband? Welcome to La La Land, ladies and gays. If you don't keep your man satisfied, there is some other hussy who will. I thought keeping things spicy in the bedroom was the only surefire way to keep my man from straying. #LessonLearned. I'm not talking about any below-the-belt action, just some harmless grab-assing and sexy making out. I can definitely appreciate a pretty girl, so on occasion I would hook up with girlfriends so that my husband could watch. (Sometimes the girl had a boyfriend or husband, too, who also seemed to enjoy the show). It was harmless and Eddie seemed to appreciate it because, without fail, it would lead to some pretty hot sex afterward. Like I said, I was just an average Hollywood housewife doing whatever I could to keep my husband happy. 

 

 

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1 hour ago, suomi said:

I skimmed through Brandi's book last night because I was thinking that's where I first  learned some Gerard Butler details. No luck so far, but I saw an interesting passage in the first chapter. Part of that chapter is available on the book's Amazon page. 

Excerpted from Drinking and Tweeting: And Other Brandi Blunders (2013)

 

It’s in the second book. I’m embarrassed that I know this. Chapter 4. “so I f*cked a movie star” 

A hockey player threw a party at his Malibu mansion. Brandi went and hung around all day. Gerard introduces himself. He invited her to a hotel. She declined because Brandi isn’t easy 😂 

She writes “the more available you are, the less interesting you are” 

He asked for her number, she gave it to him. She didn’t have anything to write with but he shocked her by memorizing it. He texted her the next morning. She goes on to again explain that despite not having the boys her day was free but she told him she had dinner plans but her afternoon was free, you don’t want to seem too available. 
He asked her to lunch, she drove out to his house. They talked for two hours which lead to sex. She disses the experience in the way only Brandi can. Oh he wasn’t bad but she just wasn’t feeling it. She worked her magic trick to get it over with. 
She tried to leave but couldn’t because the glass of wine she had was enough that the breathalyzer in her car wouldn’t let it start. He gave her some water and had to go but let her stay in his house by herself for an hour or so flipping through magazines to give enough time that her car would start. He called her a few days later to ask her to lunch. She agreed but said she’d meet him in a restaurant. She claims she wasn’t interested in sleeping with him again but maybe if they spent more time together that would change. 

Then the TMZ thing happened. Brandi who? He wasn’t denying her, he just didn’t know her whole name or that she was on a tv show. 

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1 hour ago, LemonSoda said:

He gave her some water and had to go but let her stay in his house by herself for an hour or so flipping through magazines to give enough time that her car would start.

Thank you for that update. I did not know there was a second book!

Flipping through medicine cabinets and drawers is more like it. On WWHL in 2012 she said "It wasn't a one-nighter, it was just a little week of fun" and rated him an 11 between the sheets. One night or one week depends on who she's talking to. 

I cannot find a source but I can time the "We had sex on the beach right after we met" as being in 2014. I was watching the pilot episode of The Affair on Netflix in October and after an argument in their front yard Alison's husband Cole leaned her over the hood of their car and went at it while Noah (her new lover) secretly watched from a short distance away. I hollered "Brandi!" because when I first heard her sex on the beach tale I wondered who might have seen them. 

 

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2 hours ago, suomi said:

Thank you for that update. I did not know there was a second book!

It’s Drinking and Dating. One surprising thing to me is she’s had other famous boyfriends but hasn’t blabbed about them by name. She was dating Billy from Melrose Place around the time she met Eddie. 

The book isn’t really worth buying. Neither were. If I knew how to post a link on here to the epubs to share I would. 

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17 hours ago, LemonSoda said:

She was dating Billy from Melrose Place around the time she met Eddie.

Two men, both alike in acting ability... But Andrew Shue seems to be a pretty decent guy who's philanthropic, intelligent and community minded while Eddie is a freeloading philanderer. So of course Brandi ended up with Applicant B.

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13 hours ago, Iris987 said:

Two men, both alike in acting ability... But Andrew Shue seems to be a pretty decent guy who's philanthropic, intelligent and community minded while Eddie is a freeloading philanderer. So of course Brandi ended up with Applicant B.

Does Eddie Cibrian act anymore? he seems like a washed up hasbeen.

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Well, it's not too difficult to find the posts of Brandi's sons telling Andy that he needs to hire their mom back on the show and also to compensate her for being the star of this past season because they believe that she carried this season.  So they are well aware of what she is spewing out there.

She is not fit to be their mother. It's sick and she is just horrid.

Eddie needs to step in and grab those boys before they are more fucked up than they already are.

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What kind of person has thier child beg thier former boss for thier job back or ask for a bonus? I've long despised this nasty ho, but I gave her the benefit of the doubt to not be a completely horrible mother. 

I sincerely doubt Eddie will do more than maybe have a few words with her. His career has never been that great and is downright sad recently, so his income is lower and hers would be greatly increased by getting back on the housewives, which gives him the perfect opportunity to get his child support lowered. I suspect he may have fully supported her in having their son's record that plea for money. Leanne is probably sick and tired of covering that monthly payment to her icky nemesis. 

I'm already pretty much over BH, but Brandi coming back would be the final nail in the coffin. I don't want to see her, hear her or hear about her next season. In fact I didn't even watch the video. I read what the boys said in text form so I could avoid her over-worked face and grating voice!

 

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I think her kids speaking their mind doesnt make her some type of horrible mother. They are smart enough to know when she has more money then they have more money and life is easier and if she is going to make a fool of herself at least get a steady paycheck for doing so.

I loved Brandi in the beginning and now its more of a love/hate relationship but I dont think she really fits in with the current "Glam" era of RHOBH. The high glam and glam team are just not her and when she tried it this season it felt very off brand for her.

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1 hour ago, Primal Slayer said:

I think her kids speaking their mind doesnt make her some type of horrible mother. They are smart enough to know when she has more money then they have more money and life is easier and if she is going to make a fool of herself at least get a steady paycheck for doing so.

I loved Brandi in the beginning and now its more of a love/hate relationship but I dont think she really fits in with the current "Glam" era of RHOBH. The high glam and glam team are just not her and when she tried it this season it felt very off brand for her.

I listened to the podcast.  Brandi was surprisingly good.  I'm in the love/hate camp as well. I'm definately partial to a humble Brandi.

Her son asking Andy about getting paid was fine. It didn't come off as desperate and it didn't sound like Brandi made him do it. It was actually sweet - even Andy said as much. 

I'm not a Brandi apologist, but actually listening to the podcast helps with context.  And, it did sound as if she and her boys have a really good relationship.

I agree that Bravo his over her - at least where RHBH is concerned.  Andy was nice and responsive to Brandi's questions but you could tell that the door was closed.

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On 9/30/2020 at 6:59 PM, Jextella said:

I listened to the podcast.  Brandi was surprisingly good.  I'm in the love/hate camp as well. I'm definately partial to a humble Brandi.

Her son asking Andy about getting paid was fine. It didn't come off as desperate and it didn't sound like Brandi made him do it. It was actually sweet - even Andy said as much. 

I'm not a Brandi apologist, but actually listening to the podcast helps with context.  And, it did sound as if she and her boys have a really good relationship.

I agree that Bravo his over her - at least where RHBH is concerned.  Andy was nice and responsive to Brandi's questions but you could tell that the door was closed.

IIRC from her books, she barely receives any child support. They lived off of credit their entire marriage. Brandi was in the dark about their finances because all their bills went to her MIL’s house. She spent her savings on buying him a boat. 
I remember a podcast episode where she talked about having to compete for her kids affection which I found sad. It boiled down to Leeann could afford things she couldn’t. Her son who was maybe 12 at the time wanted a Supreme hat or shirt. 

What I found sad was her own self sabotaging. She had built up quite a nice nest egg between RHOBH, her books, her clothing line, appearances and then the podcast. She sabotaged herself and likes to play victim. Even now. 

I haven’t listened to her podcast in ages, life got in the way but she’s a very good interviewer at times. She’s good at conversation. There have been moments when I felt she cut someone off on the verge of saying something interesting or fully answering. But it’s a podcast not a professional interview! Sometimes she shows heart, she treated Courtney Stodden like a human which no one seems to do. I found it endearing that Brandi was nice to her. The awkwardness of her conversation with Farrah Abraham showed how observant she is. To Farrah “You don’t make eye contact when you talk” 

Humble Brandi can be funny, sharp witted and amusing. But she rarely shows up. We get foul mouthed hot mess Brandi instead. 

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Okay guys hear me out. So we've all seen season 4 and 5 of the housewives of BV where Brandi was in a fight with Lisa and Kyle. I think I have a theory on why she acted like that or why she started all the drama. Some of you may be a fan of her, so please don't get offended or anything, because it is just a theory. So everybody remembers the first time the girls met Brandi, it was at an event that Kyle hosted. Everybody made fun of her crutches and they were being mean girls. Well I think that Brandi is now (so in season 3,4 & 5) taking revenge on the girls for being mean girls and laughing at her. Because she had a fight with Adrienne, Lisa, Kim and Kyle, some of the girls who were at the event. Maybe I am overthinking things, but I think it could be a logical explanation of her behavior on those seasons. Is there anyone who agrees with me or thinks the same, or am I literally the only one? 

I feel like Brandi could have had some type of a mental snap when her husband cheated on her and ended up marrying his mistress.  But maybe her personality before that happened was the same as it is now.  I didn’t know she existed until seeing her on this show.

I believe that grudge lasted for years so maybe she carried one for the women as well.

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23 hours ago, laddulle said:

Okay guys hear me out. So we've all seen season 4 and 5 of the housewives of BV where Brandi was in a fight with Lisa and Kyle. I think I have a theory on why she acted like that or why she started all the drama. Some of you may be a fan of her, so please don't get offended or anything, because it is just a theory. So everybody remembers the first time the girls met Brandi, it was at an event that Kyle hosted. Everybody made fun of her crutches and they were being mean girls. Well I think that Brandi is now (so in season 3,4 & 5) taking revenge on the girls for being mean girls and laughing at her. Because she had a fight with Adrienne, Lisa, Kim and Kyle, some of the girls who were at the event. Maybe I am overthinking things, but I think it could be a logical explanation of her behavior on those seasons. Is there anyone who agrees with me or thinks the same, or am I literally the only one? 

I think Brandi actually got away with a lot of because so many of us felt bad for how she was treated her first season on the show. A lot of us even cut her slack after what she pulled with Adrienne because Brandi was likable season 2 and Adrienne was not. I even remember feeling bad for poor, single mom Brandi being sued by this super rich family (allegedly). 

I don't think the way Brandi was treated excuses how horribly she treated others later on. I think she got a big head after so much support after Game Night and still having a lot of fans season 3. She has also gotten into it with a lot of people who aren't even on RHBH. She is a drama queen and can be vindictive. I think she's one of the more dangerous cast members because she has no problem outing very sensitive, personal information. 

All that said, I don't think she's in the wrong 100% of the time. She has her likable moments. I liked when she defended Kyle with Carlton. I think Brandi does have a genuine affection for Kim despite the fact they were both cruel to each other years ago. Some of these women only care about one another as "Hollywood friends," but I think Brandi does have the capacity to care for people beyond TV allies. Vanderpump throwing Scheana in her face over and over wasn't very nice. Brandi was right to take issue with that. I think there's a strong possibility Brandi sincerely felt bad for Kyle with Vanderpump wanting tabloids in the suitcase. Brandi isn't my favorite, but I'm someone who calls things as I see them and never going to be team LVP or whatever just because I prefer her. 

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On 8/23/2021 at 7:24 PM, RealHousewife said:

I don't think the way Brandi was treated excuses how horribly she treated others later on. I think she got a big head after so much support after Game Night and still having a lot of fans season 3. She has also gotten into it with a lot of people who aren't even on RHBH. She is a drama queen and can be vindictive. I think she's one of the more dangerous cast members because she has no problem outing very sensitive, personal information. 

 

On 8/24/2021 at 4:22 AM, Hiyo said:

Ok, but why did she flip on LVP?

I don't remember the details, but I agree with RH that she had a big head and thought she could do anything (culminating in her slap of LVP, which I know she thought was hilarious fun but would not have been for Lisa.)  Add that to Lisa's expectation for that minions will perform for her on cue; also the fact that LVP is a huge grudge carrier and Brandy is vindictive and nasty, and it would have been inevitable.

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On 8/24/2021 at 4:22 AM, Hiyo said:

Ok, but why did she flip on LVP?

Brandi seemed to realize she had been manipulated and used by LVP - and it pissed the hell out of her.

LVP groomed Brandi prior to the season in order to have a tool to do her dirty work. Much later, viewers were able to see how LVP grooms people in her fawning over fellow horsewoman “Teddi Bear.”

Edited by nexxie
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4 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

But even if it's true, why is it anyone's business? I don't care who Denise slept with, and Brandi has serious issues and has burned so many bridges.

When I watched the episode where Brandi tells them about her supposed fling with Denise, I kept thinking "What is her purpose here?" It seemed odd to talk about it to the other ladies.

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43 minutes ago, Surrealist said:

But even if it's true, why is it anyone's business? I don't care who Denise slept with, and Brandi has serious issues and has burned so many bridges.

When I watched the episode where Brandi tells them about her supposed fling with Denise, I kept thinking "What is her purpose here?" It seemed odd to talk about it to the other ladies.

Oh I completely agree! Even if she’s honest, she’s still vile.

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4 hours ago, Surrealist said:

Right! I hope you didn't think I was commenting directly at you

I remember how hateful Rinna was toward Denise after Brandi broke that news. It's none of your business, Rinna!

Aw no worries! 

I know. She was gleeful. If my friend did do that, I'd do my best to keep her business private. The only person who has a right to know is Aaron. I'd have to refrain myself from teasing though. I'd want to be like, girl, you're Denise Richards, a Bond girl ffs. All these beautiful women all over LA, and you mess with Brandi?! 

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https://pagesix.com/2024/12/11/celebrity-news/brandi-glanville-lost-5-teeth-while-battling-facial-disfigurement/

Brandi says her facial swelling has caused her to lose 5 teeth, that is why her face looks thin. She says she has trouble chewing and doesn't smile because one missing tooth is near the front. She says Phaedra Parks (from RHoA, Married to Medicine, Traitors, Dancing with the Stars, etc.) put her in touch with a dentist.

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(edited)
On 12/11/2024 at 11:54 AM, NowVoyager said:

Brandi's original face:

 

Screenshot_20241211_114702_Reddit.thumb.jpg.e91e1b77bf1d36c47ad8a94fdf538b64.jpg

 

 

Screenshot_20241211_115230_Reddit.thumb.jpg.6c8a7e6e1b986a91087f16e66f7984a7.jpg

Her after Hollywood makeover:

Screenshot_20241211_114530_SamsungInternet.thumb.jpg.8d760d4a48ef8a91f6ce90a275da0c83.jpg

Her first nose job, veneers, botox in forehead, some filler in cheeks and lips I think, but going for a natural look.

Bravo was showing episodes from her first Beverly Hills HWs season yesterday. I watched for a second to compare how she looked back then, and today...

ETA: I like her original face and nose more than the next ones which look generic.

Edited by ZettaK
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11 hours ago, NowVoyager said:

https://pagesix.com/2024/12/11/celebrity-news/brandi-glanville-lost-5-teeth-while-battling-facial-disfigurement/

Brandi says her facial swelling has caused her to lose 5 teeth, that is why her face looks thin. She says she has trouble chewing and doesn't smile because one missing tooth is near the front. She says Phaedra Parks (from RHoA, Married to Medicine, Traitors, Dancing with the Stars, etc.) put her in touch with a dentist.

Oh god. Is it gonna be Dr. Heavenly?

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Brandi is not my favorite, but my heart breaks for her. I don’t know what happened, but she was a beautiful girl. I don’t buy that her facial stuff is Bravo’s fault, but I hope she is able to get help. Do most people think this is filler gone wrong? I’m trying to avoid getting any due to the horror stories, but so many people get filler with no issues. 

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3 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Brandi is not my favorite, but my heart breaks for her. I don’t know what happened, but she was a beautiful girl. I don’t buy that her facial stuff is Bravo’s fault, but I hope she is able to get help. Do most people think this is filler gone wrong? I’m trying to avoid getting any due to the horror stories, but so many people get filler with no issues. 

Brandi really needs therapy. I hope she gets help but it seems she hasn’t hit rock bottom yet, which is sad.

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4 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

Brandi is not my favorite, but my heart breaks for her. I don’t know what happened, but she was a beautiful girl. I don’t buy that her facial stuff is Bravo’s fault, but I hope she is able to get help. Do most people think this is filler gone wrong? I’m trying to avoid getting any due to the horror stories, but so many people get filler with no issues. 

I had fillers once, and while I didn’t suffer any trauma, I couldn’t wait for them to dissolve, because I felt like I didn’t “look like myself, only better….. “ I guess I’m not brave enough to try again….

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(edited)
On 12/8/2024 at 9:42 PM, Salacious Kitty said:

Is Botched still a thing? Because she needs real help. 

Dr. Terry Dubrow Explains Brandi Glanville's Face Isn't Because of Parasite https://www.tmz.com/2024/12/12/dr-terry-dubrow-brandi-glanville-face-parasite/

Dr. Dubrow of Botched offers Brandi assistance. Hooray! He says she needs a proper diagnosis, whether something bacterial or viral was injected onto her bloodstream during her filler procedures. He says it's not her fault, it's her doctor's fault. He says she needs help urgently because every minute the infection stays in her bloodstream it's causing more damage. He says it's not a parasite because that would be from something she ate. He says it could take a year of antibiotics to clear the infection. He says they need to take a tissue sample and analyze it.

Hm. It sounds like Brandi has spent $70,000 over the last year & a half going to quack doctors since she doesn't even have a proper diagnosis at this point.

Edited to add: I didn't link the article, but she said she spent $70,000.

Edited by NowVoyager
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