Catelynn (and Tyler)

[Snarky McSnarky]

Delete -- already covered.

Edited September 9, 2016 by Snarky McSnarky

[Snarky McSnarky]

On 9/6/2016 at 4:46 PM, GreatKazu said:

Not sure if this was posted here before. Just came across this when Googling something:

http://radaronline.com/celebrity-news/tyler-baltierra-admits-drug-use-teen-mom-og/

 

The 'Teen Mom OG' star reveals he's high 'whenever I have free time!'

So he's high all the time?

[ghoulina]

3 hours ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

The 'Teen Mom OG' star reveals he's high 'whenever I have free time!'

So he's high all the time?

LOL, yes. I want to know what he considers "free time". His entire life is free time. 

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

13 hours ago, dabronx said:

Wow I find that website linked to above absolutely fascinating in it's take on adoption and adoptive parents. It's so weird for me to see comments very anti Adoptive Parents and anti-adoption in general and especially because the comments come from a place that assumes bad intentions on part of AP and bad emotional outcomes for adopted children no matter what.  It's really interesting as well that with Cate & Tyler you see what our society's general assumption of the "typical" lifestyles and age range of those choosing adoption, whereas commenters on that article seem to be more articulate and coherent, which leads me to believe they are from higher socio-economic levels (and by the way some of them are pissed! - not at C&T but at the very idea of adoption at all).  Even as the author and some commenters talks about the evils of AP I feel like dude - watch the show. Cate and Tyler are drug dependent, emotionally unstable people surrounded by other addicts, recovering addicts and an extended family history rife with physical, emotional, and drug abuse. So tell me again about the evil APs who close open adoptions?  It's really super fascinating though because it's from such a different perspective then what we most often see. Sorry I'm nerding out on some sort of social science or anthropological place on this.... going back to read through more comments. LOL.

I fell down that same rabbit hole due to what they'd previously published about Cate and Ty there years ago. I recommend reading the response Tyler wrote them and the blog owners' response back.

If you're nerding out and loving it, I also recommend The Girls who Went Away, a book about birth mothers during the Baby Scoop Era. Very different situations from Tyler & Cate, but since Cate was highly pressured by Tyler to place Carly, some of it is relevant to them...and the whole book is fascinating (and heartbreaking).

I've come to see adoption very differently thanks to Cate & Tyler and that blog. I think many people think of adoption as always a positive thing, but there's also a strong anti-adoption sentiment among many in this country, even though we never hear about it. A girl I babysat as a child & was close family friends with her parents is a highly-intelligent, highly religious college senior from a middle class family. Her family has no history of drug use, child/animal neglect, domestic violence, they all work, etc.  Sophomore year of college, she and her boyfriend, a senior from a very wealthy, old-money family got pregnant. At first, all I heard was how excited she was and her plan to go to school, work, have the baby, and make it work. Boyfriend was set to graduate a month or so after the baby was due and he had a cushy job set up at his parents' firm. A few months later, boyfriend has pressured her to put the baby up for adoption or he'll break up with her. Apparently his family didn't take to well to this middle class girl having his baby and him being tethered to her for life (if even just via child support payments & custody exchanges). The boy's parents even found a wealthy, highly educated couple (also from old money) among their friends who couldn't have kids to be the adoptive parents. They told her they loved her like she was their daughter, too, and promised she'd always be a part of their family. Well, as you can imagine, she expected more access to and regular info about the baby....and the adoptive parents expected much less (and are giving much less).   

She ultimately chose adoption and has been very depressed since the birth.   It was like watching Catelynn and Tyler play out in front of me, except that this girl didn't come from the dysfunctional home that Cate did and was from a nice, middle-class family. Since there was no MTV show following her after, she and the boyfriend did eventually split. I wish I would have been brave enough at some point to tell her "If you want to keep the baby, do it. Pick the baby over your boyfriend. You'll probably break up anyway." BUT I was so afraid to go against the positive-adoption rhetoric and couldn't argue that financially, the adoptive parents could provide more than she could. I sensed towards the end of her pregnancy that she didn't want to go through with the adoption, but that she wanted to keep her boyfriend around and felt guilty about leaving the childless couple without a baby. So yes....birth parents come in all shapes and sizes and from all socioeconomic and educational backgronds...but all seem to face these same hurdles. 

Cate and Tyler's story is tough for me because obviously Carly got a better deal living with B&T than Nova has. But I can't imagine how much Cate's heart breaks daily and the guilt she still feels, plus the grief and loss. I know in my head placing Carly was the best decision, but it still hurts my heart for Cate and I wish she could have kept Carly and had proper resources and support to do so. However, then I look at people like Jenelle and realize that some people just should not ever be parents and want B&T to go steal Kaiser....

Adoption is just such a complicated issue. I think it's good that the cracks are showing in the perfect adoption rhetoric C&T like to spin because at least it opens up conversations about realities about adoption, specifically those that birth parents face. 

Edited September 9, 2016 by MyPeopleAreNordic

[Scarlett45]

2 hours ago, MyPeopleAreNordic said:

I fell down that same rabbit hole due to what they'd previously published about Cate and Ty there years ago. I recommend reading the response Tyler wrote them and the blog owners' response back.

If you're nerding out and loving it, I also recommend The Girls who Went Away, a book about birth mothers during the Baby Scoop Era. Very different situations from Tyler & Cate, but since Cate was highly pressured by Tyler to place Carly, some of it is relevant to them...and the whole book is fascinating (and heartbreaking).

I've come to see adoption very differently thanks to Cate & Tyler and that blog. I think many people think of adoption as always a positive thing, but there's also a strong anti-adoption sentiment among many in this country, even though we never hear about it. A girl I babysat as a child & was close family friends with her parents is a highly-intelligent, highly religious college senior from a middle class family. Her family has no history of drug use, child/animal neglect, domestic violence, they all work, etc.  Sophomore year of college, she and her boyfriend, a senior from a very wealthy, old-money family got pregnant. At first, all I heard was how excited she was and her plan to go to school, work, have the baby, and make it work. Boyfriend was set to graduate a month or so after the baby was due and he had a cushy job set up at his parents' firm. A few months later, boyfriend has pressured her to put the baby up for adoption or he'll break up with her. Apparently his family didn't take to well to this middle class girl having his baby and him being tethered to her for life (if even just via child support payments & custody exchanges). The boy's parents even found a wealthy, highly educated couple (also from old money) among their friends who couldn't have kids to be the adoptive parents. They told her they loved her like she was their daughter, too, and promised she'd always be a part of their family. Well, as you can imagine, she expected more access to and regular info about the baby....and the adoptive parents expected much less (and are giving much less).   

She ultimately chose adoption and has been very depressed since the birth.   It was like watching Catelynn and Tyler play out in front of me, except that this girl didn't come from the dysfunctional home that Cate did and was from a nice, middle-class family. Since there was no MTV show following her after, she and the boyfriend did eventually split. I wish I would have been brave enough at some point to tell her "If you want to keep the baby, do it. Pick the baby over your boyfriend. You'll probably break up anyway." BUT I was so afraid to go against the positive-adoption rhetoric and couldn't argue that financially, the adoptive parents could provide more than she could. I sensed towards the end of her pregnancy that she didn't want to go through with the adoption, but that she wanted to keep her boyfriend around and felt guilty about leaving the childless couple without a baby. So yes....birth parents come in all shapes and sizes and from all socioeconomic and educational backgronds...but all seem to face these same hurdles. 

Cate and Tyler's story is tough for me because obviously Carly got a better deal living with B&T than Nova has. But I can't imagine how much Cate's heart breaks daily and the guilt she still feels, plus the grief and loss. I know in my head placing Carly was the best decision, but it still hurts my heart for Cate and I wish she could have kept Carly and had proper resources and support to do so. However, then I look at people like Jenelle and realize that some people just should not ever be parents and want B&T to go steal Kaiser....

Adoption is just such a complicated issue. I think it's good that the cracks are showing in the perfect adoption rhetoric C&T like to spin because at least it opens up conversations about realities about adoption, specifically those that birth parents face. 

Yes it really is a multi-layered issue. For people that don't wish to parent (for whatever reason), adoption is and should be an option for them. 

For those that would like to parent but don't have adequate supports (financial, emotional, physical etc), it's a very hard decision to make. 

[poopchute]

I went looking for Tyler's response on that first mothers forum because I knew it would be an amusing read.  Here is the link:

http://www.firstmotherforum.com/2012/11/tyler-of-16-and-pregnant-tells-fmf-off_17.html?m=1

 

My favorite parts:

1.  "Because she is, like all children, innocent and never asked to be brought into this world, especially the chaotic lifestyle that was inevitable for her considering I was a child myself. Is that not what parents do for their children? Sacrifice and do whatever is best for their children, regardless how it affects themselves? Putting that child first and always first, far above themselves?"

 

Is that what they are doing now, sacrificing and doing what is best for their children?  Putting their child first?  Keeping her out of a chaotic lifestyle?

2.  "I took the time to distinctively learn EVERYTHING about adoption and how each type is different from the other. I informed myself of my decision based on pure fact, that I acquired through my own research. I decided on what was best for my daughter and acted on that immediately. BCS helped with grief counseling yes, but I took the initiative to educate myself on this lifelong decision before, well as you say "being brainwashed" by BCS. So another FALSE statement you ignorantly wrote."

I don't believe for one second he researched anything or understood how adoption works.

 

3.  "Catelyn and I's adoption" "Catelyn and I's life"

?

Edited September 9, 2016 by poopchute

[teapot]

1 minute ago, poopchute said:

 

2.  "I took the time to distinctively learn EVERYTHING about adoption and how each type is different from the other. I informed myself of my decision based on pure fact, that I acquired through my own research. I decided on what was best for my daughter and acted on that immediately. BCS helped with grief

 

I'm just glad that he informed himself of his decision.  Otherwise he wouldn't have known what he'd decided on, and that probably wouldn' t have been good.

[ghoulina]

I love when people distinctively learn. 

[teapot]

8 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I love when people distinctively learn. 

Right?  Indistinct learning is one of the biggest challenges faced by this country's educational system.

[ChristmasJones]

I think the whole situation for Cate and Tyler and Carly is just very sad.  Had Cate kept Carly, it would be one type of sad. Now that they gave her up for adoption, its just another type of sad.

My only personal experience with adoption is a friend I met when she was in her 60's. I came to find out that she had given away her only daughter for adoption when she was around 20yo. I believe it was due to being a single mother. I can't recall all the details. But it always weighed on her. During the time I knew her, she managed to track down her daughter using craigslist. They developed a relationship, and eventually my friend moved to live near her. She said the the adoptive mother was not happy about it, but the daughter wanted a relationship with her.  It showed me how complicated these things can be, even decades later.

I wish Cate could just take the long view. Carly will not be a child forever. There will be a time when it becomes Carly's choice as to what sort of relationship she wants to have with her birth parents.  I wish Cate could focus on getting herself together and getting physically and mentally healthy - for Nova, for herself, and for Carly.

[MargeGunderson]

The only thing that rings true about Tyler's statement is that it was all about Tyler and his decision. It's like Cate wasn't even there!

[evilmindatwork]

Or Carly could want nothing to do with her. People seem to have such varied reactions to adoption. 

[CofCinci]

"Another correction,

I did all the research about adoption before even calling BCS. I took the time to distinctively learn EVERYTHING about adoption and how each type is different from the other. I informed myself of my decision based on pure fact, that I acquired through my own research. I decided on what was best for my daughter and acted on that immediately. BCS helped with grief counseling yes, but I took the initiative to educate myself on this lifelong decision before, well as you say "being brainwashed" by BCS. So another FALSE statement you ignorantly wrote.

Bullshit.  Did he even Google them?  I'm guessing he posted that during the time he was paid by BCS.

[GreatKazu]

6 hours ago, poopchute said:

I went looking for Tyler's response on that first mothers forum because I knew it would be an amusing read.  Here is the link:

http://www.firstmotherforum.com/2012/11/tyler-of-16-and-pregnant-tells-fmf-off_17.html?m=1

 

My favorite parts:

1.  "Because she is, like all children, innocent and never asked to be brought into this world, especially the chaotic lifestyle that was inevitable for her considering I was a child myself. Is that not what parents do for their children? Sacrifice and do whatever is best for their children, regardless how it affects themselves? Putting that child first and always first, far above themselves?"

 

Too bad Tyler didn't apply this to Nova.

[jacksgirl]

Tyler is such a POS. I wish Cate and Nova could escape. 

[GreatKazu]

2 minutes ago, jacksgirl said:

Tyler is such a POS. I wish Cate and Nova could escape. 

Except Nova will still be in the care of a pothead who likes to drink and drive around "legally" under the influence.

[CofCinci]

6 hours ago, GreatKazu said:

Too bad Tyler didn't apply this to Nova.

Who's Nova?  Is she still around? I thought she was just rented for the wedding. 

Edited September 10, 2016 by CofCinci

[Katt]

11 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

The only thing that rings true about Tyler's statement is that it was all about Tyler and his decision. It's like Cate wasn't even there!

Admitting here that he was only thinking of himself, and I really do believe without a shadow of a doubt that he was a manipulative POS during the 16 & Pregnant episode, and not the supportive boyfriend he apparently seemed to be. I wasn't sure whether being on TV had given him some sort of god complex, but have since learned he's always been an emotional abuser, at the very least. Now I like to take the piss out of Tyler "whenever I have free time". 

Edited September 10, 2016 by Katt

[jacksgirl]

Quote

Except Nova will still be in the care of a pothead who likes to drink and drive around "legally" under the influence.

yes, Kazu you are most likely right, but maybe, just maybe if Cate got rid of Tyler, got good therapy and saw purpose in her life, she could get a job and provide a good home for her and her daughter. Unlike Tyler, she is not a fame whore.

[CofCinci]

Catelynn has legal marijuana now. She's not interested in quality therapy. I can't imagine that slouch taking the time to complete a 5-column CBT worksheet.  Now she has the legal validation to sit on her couch surrounding by neglected animals and an ignored child to smoke pot all day. "I've got a card."

Grow the fuck up. You're not 16 anymore. 

Edited September 10, 2016 by CofCinci

[Katt]

I'm not arguing with you, @CofCinci but do we have proof Catelynn has a card, or is she lying for damage control?

[CofCinci]

1 hour ago, Katt said:

I'm not arguing with you, @CofCinci but do we have proof Catelynn has a card, or is she lying for damage control?

Catelynn tweeted in response to this week's episode:

https://mobile.twitter.com/CatelynnLowell/status/773156332601913349

[Katt]

I still think she's lying. 

[Brooklynista]

So one card covers three people? Cause we now know Cate, Tyler and April were getting weeded.

Her lying is starting to annoy me like Maci's. Just because you're stupid doesn't mean we are.

[GreatKazu]

Cate is a lying POS. 

[ReadMeLattice]

From what I understand, she admits to using illegally on the show and now she uses legally. Indica is great for severe anxiety. And pot and therapy are not mutually exclusive... psychiatrists often actually prescribe it. But I don't think she's getting any quality therapy except for her awkward filmed convos with Copy Machine Lady.

I have no sympathy for those who willfully put others' lives at risk by driving under any influence, though. It's part of why I can't stand Nathan. It's extremely selfish. 

Edited September 10, 2016 by Lm2162

[GreatKazu]

Catelynn is trying to cover her wide ass by mentioning the card. Even if by some small chance she has a card, she didn't get it because some reputable doctor advised marijuana use.  Assuming she did get some doctor to prescribe marijuana, it is probably some hick who works out of some small office in a strip mall, prescribing pain pills to every addict that seeks their daily fix. Hell, April probably told Cate where to go.

Cate won't seek a proper therapist because they will tell her the truth which is to stop dicking around and let's be real. She wants to be coddled and told what she wants to hear.
 

[Snarky McSnarky]

I wonder what her "qualifying condition" is.  

http://www.denalihealthcaremi.com/legally-get-medical-marijuana-card-in-michigan

[ReadMeLattice]

5 minutes ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

I wonder what her "qualifying condition" is.  

http://www.denalihealthcaremi.com/legally-get-medical-marijuana-card-in-michigan

She likely does actually have PTSD which is a qualifying condition. But I really, really, really doubt she actually got a diagnosis of that...

[iwasish]

On September 7, 2016 at 10:04 PM, geekamonggeeks said:

I'm still sort of surprised that Cate decided to smoke pot on camera, knowing that Brandon and Teresa watch the show (or at least keep up with it enough so they can monitor whether C&T are breaking their rules), after freaking out over the possibility of losing contact with them and Carly. Even if they weren't hardcore Christians, I don't think B&T would be so cool with the fact that their daughter's birth mother is getting high while driving and that her birth father is asking where the roaches are in their gross home while her birth sister is running around unattended. They can't do anything about C&T smoking weed in the privacy of their own home, but Cate and Ty advertising their pothead tendencies wasn't a smart move. I'm guessing that C&T had no idea that MTV would include this footage and that may be why they thought just covering up the dashboard cameras was enough. This may also be why Catelynn chose not to watch this season; underneath all her Instagram swagger and Bob Marley boasting, she's still a sensitive person who's deeply embarrassed of her recent actions and decisions. She may also have realized that B&T would most likely see those episodes or at least read about them, and could have some big questions about how much contact she and Tyler can have with Carly now. Cate has potentially screwed herself over in several different ways, and she knows it. 

I wonder if Catelyn subconsciously WANTS B&T to cut off their contact with Carly. Could be deep down she's started to realize that if she wants to change her life and move forward with Nova, she has to let go of the past. And pot smoking on camera? She has to know B&T will not like that, med card or not. Is she sabotaging their contact with Carly deliberately? If they did lose contact with her,would their relationship survive? I don't think she has the balls to leave him, but.. If he left her.... She already does plenty to piss him off...by not losing weight, by buying a 3k pig etc. almost seems like she is trying to get him to leave.

And finally, does she know that sadly, it's Carly and this fantasy they've created around her, that is keeping both her and Tyler stagnating .Carly isn't theirs. Never was, never will be. Why not give the love and attention they dream of giving to Carly to the child that they do have, she must be starved for it.

[geekamonggeeks]

So on Twitter, Cate claimed that she used the Post-It note to cover up her cigarette smoking even though (as another user pointed out) she told Dr. Drew that she doesn't smoke cigarettes. She and Tyler are slipping up hardcore and can't even keep their lies straight, especially when there's photographic and filmed evidence that they're lying. It's just pathetic now. 

As for the whole contact thing...I also wondered if maybe C&T are actively trying to push B&T into closing the adoption. I think Catelynn genuinely appreciates the relationship she has with Brandon, Teresa, and Carly, but I also think the contact kills her. She's always highly upset and emotional both before and after their visits, and is reeling for days after. I think Nova's presence is making it harder for Cate to see Carly and she may be better off if the adoption is closed until Carly reaches the age where she can decide for herself if she wants to pursue a relationship with her birth parents. It's not like Carly will be left wondering who her birth parents are--they've left her a very public TV series detailing who they are, where they came from, and why they gave her up. She's in a very unique position as an adoptee. 

[DNR]

On September 9, 2016 at 4:17 PM, poopchute said:

2.  "I took the time to distinctively learn EVERYTHING about adoption and how each type is different from the other. I informed myself of my decision based on pure fact, that I acquired through my own research. I decided on what was best for my daughter and acted on that immediately. BCS helped with grief counseling yes, but I took the initiative to educate myself on this lifelong decision before, well as you say "being brainwashed" by BCS. So another FALSE statement you ignorantly wrote."

< sigh> Tyler Tyler Tyler ... I had to read & re-read this incomprehensible word salad by the boy wonder. So many big words !  . Not just learn but " distinctively" learn?...not just come to a decision but informed himself of his decision?( I hate when I forget to inform myself !)  Thank God for spellcheck.  I wish he'd write more - I need the entertainment ?

[CofCinci]

He's reminding B&T about their agreement...

[geekamonggeeks]

"It's based on good faith", which Tyler has failed to provide for B&T more or less since the adoption was finalized. Time to cut the cord until these two children can grow up. 

[AhFillAck]

7 hours ago, DNR said:

< sigh> Tyler Tyler Tyler ... I had to read & re-read this incomprehensible word salad by the boy wonder. So many big words !  . Not just learn but " distinctively" learn?...not just come to a decision but informed himself of his decision?( I hate when I forget to inform myself !)  Thank God for spellcheck.  I wish he'd write more - I need the entertainment ?

LOLOLOL!!!!!!

[DudeLeaveMeAlone]

I made a mistake. I engaged in a discussion about Catelynn and Tyle on Facebook (in a mom group). And this is what I got - 

I personally think he has supported her 110% on everything she has accomplished thus far. He in my eyes is the perfect example on how a SO should be. He's caring, compassionate, understanding and his hair is on point lol I think if she didn't have his support she would def be addicted to drugs and in a bigger depression that she is in now.

His hair is on point?? No. Just NO.

[Katt]

I got hoofed out of a Facebook group for simply saying I don't like him. I didn't elaborate because there isn't enough time in the world. His hair? LOL. I wonder if my husband will completely change and become a total tosser if he starts using "product" on his fright wig? 

Edited September 13, 2016 by Katt

[geekamonggeeks]

It'll probably be easier for Cate to get off drugs than to get off Tyler. 

[MargeGunderson]

1 hour ago, DudeLeaveMeAlone said:

I made a mistake. I engaged in a discussion about Catelynn and Tyle on Facebook (in a mom group). And this is what I got - 

I personally think he has supported her 110% on everything she has accomplished thus far. He in my eyes is the perfect example on how a SO should be. He's caring, compassionate, understanding and his hair is on point lol I think if she didn't have his support she would def be addicted to drugs and in a bigger depression that she is in now.

His hair is on point?? No. Just NO.

Man, if that is someone's experience of a SO being "caring, compassionate, understanding," I feel sorry for them and their low self esteem.

It also goes without saying that the person has terrible taste in hairstyles.

[ghoulina]

I didn't realize that calling your wife a "heifer" (we all know what he meant) and making decisions about your bio daughter that will cause your wife not to see her anymore were examples of being "caring, compassionate, and understanding". The schools must not be well here. 

[SPLAIN]

4 hours ago, DudeLeaveMeAlone said:

I made a mistake. I engaged in a discussion about Catelynn and Tyle on Facebook (in a mom group). And this is what I got - 

I personally think he has supported her 110% on everything she has accomplished thus far. He in my eyes is the perfect example on how a SO should be. He's caring, compassionate, understanding and his hair is on point lol I think if she didn't have his support she would def be addicted to drugs and in a bigger depression that she is in now.

His hair is on point?? No. Just NO.

Why??? Have we not taught you to avoid those people? I think you need consequences.

;-)

3 hours ago, geekamonggeeks said:

It'll probably be easier for Cate to get off drugs than to get off Tyler. 

Amen.

[Miss Chevious]

Catelynn is a mess. There's just no other word for it. She's a big fat needy mess.

She needs (in no particular order) a complete makeover, including hair styling, skincare and makeup. A nutritionist to map out a healthy eating plan and weekly visits to make sure she's following it. A personal trainer. A gym membership.  A fashion stylist to advise her how to make the most of what she's got, clothing wise. A trip to the dentist. 

Then she needs parenting classes, regular visits to a board certified psychiatrist (not some schlocky copy room therapist). A few visits to Narcotics Anonymous because she needs to see how smoking pot on the regular affects not just her but people around her. 

She needs a solid education. She would benefit immensely from some entry level junior college courses or even a trade school if that's what she prefers. Any type of further education to help her determine a career path for herself and get her off the couch.

She needs goals and to wake up each day feeling she has a purpose in life, not just to sluff around in a haze. She needs to move forward, not dwell in the past and let her past consume her.

Last but not least she needs a backbone so she can dump that toxic lump of humanity (Tyler) who doesn't have her best interests at heart and holds her back from becoming the person she could be.

When Tyler said she needs a lot of work, he wasn't kidding.  

[DangerousMinds]

Some good points, but I think appearance should be last on that list.

[teapot]

1 hour ago, DangerousMinds said:

Some good points, but I think appearance should be last on that list.

I think that when someone fixes their "inside", they start feeling better about themselves, and then the "outside" just naturally follows...when you feel good, you want to look good. Also, check Sonja from RHONY; when she cut down on the drinking, everyone kept telling her she was glowing!

[Calm81]

While folding laundry today I decided, against my better judgement, to re-watch Cate and Tyler's 16 & pregnant episode and, crap, should I go on?

I got to see, all over again, how adorable and peppy (even though she was going through a heartbreaking time of her life) Catelynn was. She did her makeup, tried to look cute, and even did that short hairstyle with all of those flower headbands. I miss that Cate. She was adorable back then and now all I see is a sad, depressed, scabbed face young mother that needs some educated support system.

You all may get mad at me for defending Cate, but I see a depressed young women that needs professional help and I can't snark or hate on her. It's Tyler I don't like. Catelynn had to go through a lot more, emotionally, physically, and mentally than Tyler and it just aggravates me when he tries to play mental health doctor to her. Instead of being a supportive husband he's always telling her what SHE can do to fix things. 

Newsflash, buttbrain, try being a better husband and just MAYBE, maybe... Catelynn will turn back to her old self with time and professional help - not being called a heifer in the process.

Im sorry for my rant, I've been through postpartum depression and regular depression and I'm lucky to NOT have Tyler by my side.

[GreatKazu]

I hear you and I understand what you are saying @Calm81. No one will hate you! :-)  Disagreeing is a different matter.

Although I feel Cate has really changed from how she used to be, I can't put it all on Tyler. At some point in time, this adult woman needs to know when it is time for her to seek proper help, and be prepared to hear the truth and be told what is in her best interest.

I realize she has not been in touch with real professionals, and Dr. Drew, as unprofessional as he is, at least told her that marijuana is a detriment to her mental well-being.  What does she do? She goes to some rehab place, comes back home, continues her life with Mary Jane Tyler who continues to tell her marijuana is the best thing for her, not the medicines the professionals likely prescribed to her. She then flounts her marijuana card status on Twitter and basically tells people who tell her what a douche Tyler is, to screw off.

I am done with her. If she wants to drive around under the influence while putting others in harms way and live her life with that douchebag, then so be it. It doesn't affect me as long as she is not driving in my state. Cate chooses to live that life. She is comfortable in her sheltered world where people don't work, don't have to get up and be parents, or worry about where their future is heading. Nova is the one who is suffering. She is the one being exposed to weed and god knows what else with C&T. It gets posted a lot that Cate is April 2.0. Well, to me, Nova is Cate 2.0 in the making.

[ReadMeLattice]

Marijuana isn't the best thing she's got going, but it's far from her worst problem. I'm of a mind that self esteem and the "little things" need to change first. 

I used to drink too much to deal with my severe PTSD. Not to the point of alcoholism by any stretch and not while or before driving, but I looked forward to those evening drinks just a tad too much, if you know what I mean. If you're at the point of chemical dependency then that's the first thing to address, but in my case I wasn't. I was employed and educated but not in therapy, not in good relationships, not pursuing hobbies, etc. JMO but the advice I would offer Cate would be: 

1. Just fucking chill. Not as in laze around like she does, but don't immediately hop on Weight Watchers, jump on three new shows, post all over Twitter. Just get some super low key job, even part time. Part time aide, work at Walgreens, literally anything that's calm and will give you some sense of money making that isn't linked to Tyler or a show or Carly. 

2. Obviously, dump the hell out of Tyler. 

3. Don't push yourself to lose all the weight and quit pot immediately. That could actually make things truly awful. Just start with a walk. Just a walk and a coffee. Then make it a longer walk. Then a short Zumba class or another fun, low pressure form of exercise. Make three better food choices per week. Just three. Then five, etc. Try a new vegetable or fruit. Nothing major, but keep adding. Cook one fresh meal a week. 

4. Make plans with a friend once a week. If you don't have friends, make a couple at a mom meetup group. 

5. Take a class in absolutely anything. Academic, personal interest, crafting, whatever. Commit to just the class for six weeks. 

6. Obviously a better therapist. 

7. Buy a plant, not a pig. 

Anything bigger would be overwhelming at this point. 

[GreatKazu]

Quote

Marijuana isn't the best thing she's got going, but it's far from her worst problem.

Cate doesn't know this because in her mind, she needs it. Therefore, it is a big problem because it is likely getting in the way of her need for medications, if she has been told she needs medication. I am on the side that she was told to take prescription meds for her mental issues, but Tyler is in her ear telling her she doesn't need them.

Catelynn definitely has bigger problems and they stem from her toxic upbringing. She isn't going to get to the real issues until she listens to the professionals, and so far, she doesn't seem to be. She wants someone to tell her it is okay to smoke weed. It is okay to be with Tyler. It is okay not to work and be at home and live your life attached to her parasitic toxic twin. It is okay to not parent your only child and dwell on the one you adopted out.  I will go as far and say she may have been told to quit the show and focus on her life, not the one her fans want her to lead.

Catelynn has been crying about her mental health state, she knows without a doubt she has problems. This is not someone who is in the dark as to what is going on with them. She knows she needs help. She just doesn't want to do what is necessary. It is like watching a person who knows they have cancer, but they won't go do the treatment. It sickens me because she has the money to seek proper health. Many people don't have that luxury. She is pissing her life away.

[ReadMeLattice]

I thought she was already on meds but Tyler, MD wanted her to wean herself off of them for no reason? Maybe I heard wrong? 

Edited September 17, 2016 by Lm2162

[EmmaPeel]

@LM2162 you give good advice, especially the short term goals thing. Catelynn lived her entire childhood lurching from crisis to crisis and has no ability to plan or think long term. She seemed so overwhelmed any time she was confronted with the prospect of a long term plan she had to create and execute whether it be school, parenting, or that damn pig (actual pig, not Tyler.) I would add to your list: burn the zebra hoodie!