Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality

[Katy M]

And people always forget about the baby monitor when they're having a private conversation in the nursery.

I'll spare you the details on why, but one time I went to my parents at 5 a.m. on a Saturday and promptly went to my old room and got in bed.  Apparently I woke my dad up, so he got up "to investigate" walked to the other end of the house, saw my car in the driveway and went back to bed.  When he told me that later, I said, "don't get up if you think there's a prowler in the house.  Pretending to be asleep is probably your best defense."  (there was no phone anywhere near my parents' room and my dad has never exactly been Rambo or anything).

[SunnyBeBe]

25 minutes ago, Katy M said:

And people always forget about the baby monitor when they're having a private conversation in the nursery.

I'll spare you the details on why, but one time I went to my parents at 5 a.m. on a Saturday and promptly went to my old room and got in bed.  Apparently I woke my dad up, so he got up "to investigate" walked to the other end of the house, saw my car in the driveway and went back to bed.  When he told me that later, I said, "don't get up if you think there's a prowler in the house.  Pretending to be asleep is probably your best defense."  (there was no phone anywhere near my parents' room and my dad has never exactly been Rambo or anything).

Oh my! You were lucky that he didn't overreact. lol  Once, when I was a teen, my parents returned home when I was in the shower.  My mom turned the door knob to the bath room just as I was getting out.  I saw it and was about half way out of the window naked, when she heard it and called me to stop.  lol  It SCARED me, but, I was glad that I was so fast.  I said mom, don't scare me like that again. 

Edited October 30, 2017 by SunnyBeBe

[CoderLady]

3 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

And my favorite is when the homeowner hears a strange noise, calls out, no one answers, so they creep throughout the house continuing to call out, "Who's there?"  lol  It's so frustrating.  Makes me root for the intruder to take them out.  Just too stupid. 

One of my many favorites is the idiot who comes home, finds signs of a struggle with goddamn bloody handprints and splashes all over the walls and instead of backing out as fast as they can and calling 911, slowly follows the blood trail. They never look around for the perpetrator, they just walk straight forward until they get to the scene of whatever happened. Then, if it's a woman, she keeps staring at the carnage while screaming her head off.

Why yes, I've started binge watching Supernatural. Why do you ask?

[Katy M]

1 hour ago, CoderLady said:

One of my many favorites is the idiot who comes home, finds signs of a struggle with goddamn bloody handprints and splashes all over the walls and instead of backing out as fast as they can and calling 911, slowly follows the blood trail. They never look around for the perpetrator, they just walk straight forward until they get to the scene of whatever happened. Then, if it's a woman, she keeps staring at the carnage while screaming her head off.

Why yes, I've started binge watching Supernatural. Why do you ask?

That drives me crazy. I don't even care if there's blood or not. If someone has clearly been in your house, you don't know if they're still there or not.  Run to a neighbor's if you know them well enough, otherwise get in your car, and call the cops from away from the house.  And, don't go back until the police are there.  Common sense, people.  I can understand it more, of course, if you walk in the door and your son is bleeding out on the floor and nothing is going to stop you from helping him, stupid or not.  But, even then, grab your cell phone and dial 911 as you run across the room.  At least, the police can be on their way if someone jumps out to kill you.

[shapeshifter]

2 hours ago, CoderLady said:

the idiot who comes home, finds signs of a struggle with goddamn bloody handprints and splashes all over the walls and instead of backing out as fast as they can and calling 911, slowly follows the blood trail. They never look around for the perpetrator, they just walk straight forward until they get to the scene of whatever happened.

And if it's a generic cop show, the idiot will then step in the blood, touch the weapon, get fingerprints or tears on the victim, or otherwise screw up the crime scene.

[Raja]

Bullets bounce off of car doors and overturned coffee tables instead of going through them

[Shannon L.]

It never ceases to amaze me what women on tv wear on their time off of work, just hanging around the house.  I've seen women in the grocery stores in cute outfits and cute shoes (including some with heels), but I can't believe any of them, when they're home for a significant amount of time, stay dressed that way (I know my friends don't).  But on tv?  Women are always dressed so well, all the time.

[Raja]

1 hour ago, Shannon L. said:

It never ceases to amaze me what women on tv wear on their time off of work, just hanging around the house.  I've seen women in the grocery stores in cute outfits and cute shoes (including some with heels), but I can't believe any of them, when they're home for a significant amount of time, stay dressed that way (I know my friends don't).  But on tv?  Women are always dressed so well, all the time.

I've let Mrs Raja know many times that I dream about being met by June Cleaver when I return from work.

[cpcathy]

Perhaps as a Halloween costume, but otherwise.......no.

[SunnyBeBe]

I think it's funny how the mom has made a big breakfast, but, the entire family says they don't have time for it and run out the door with only a sip of orange juice or one bite of toast.  I just don't buy it. lol It's so cliche.

Edited October 31, 2017 by SunnyBeBe

[Katy M]

3 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I think it's funny how the mom has made a big breakfast, but, the entire family says they don't have time for it and run out the door with only a sip of orange juice or one bite of toast.  I just don't buy it. lol It's so cliche.

If someone took the time to make me a big breakfast, I'd find the time to eat it.  At least one part of it.

[Anela]

36 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I think it's funny how the mom has made a big breakfast, but, the entire family says they don't have time for it and run out the door with only a sip of orange juice or one bite of toast.  I just don't buy it. lol It's so cliche.

People always have time to drink, though. Alcohol, I mean, not coffee as they're walking somewhere. 

[janie jones]

51 minutes ago, Katy M said:

If someone took the time to make me a big breakfast, I'd find the time to eat it.  At least one part of it.

I see where you're coming from, but the person who makes the big breakfast knows the people's schedules.  They know what time they leave for work/school.  Why didn't they have it prepared sooner so that the family actually has time to eat it?

[Ohwell]

It's so incredibly easy to just walk by and slip something in a person's pocket.  Also, there's always a pocket to slip something into.

[2727]

9 hours ago, Ohwell said:

It's so incredibly easy to just walk by and slip something in a person's pocket. Also, there's always a pocket to slip something into.

That's right up there with the briefcase switcheroo.

[ChromaKelly]

17 hours ago, janie jones said:

I see where you're coming from, but the person who makes the big breakfast knows the people's schedules.  They know what time they leave for work/school.  Why didn't they have it prepared sooner so that the family actually has time to eat it?

Because then the breakfast maker can be hurt and disappointed that the eater did not have time for the lovely breakfast. And also the breakfast eater can humorously grab a pancake or waffle and walk out while holding it and take a bite, talking with their mouth full "mmm this is good! Thanks!"
The breakfast maker will attempt this again by making dinner for her (usually it's the female partner) SO who often works late. She will then sit at a set dinner table with candles burning until the SO gets home and then will say " You're late. Dinner is cold."

Edited November 1, 2017 by ChromaKelly

[Anela]

1 hour ago, ChromaKelly said:

Because then the breakfast maker can be hurt and disappointed that the eater did not have time for the lovely breakfast. And also the breakfast eater can humorously grab a pancake or waffle and walk out while holding it and take a bite, talking with their mouth full "mmm this is good! Thanks!"
The breakfast maker will attempt this again by making dinner for her (usually it's the female partner) SO who often works late. She will then sit at a set dinner table with candles burning until the SO gets home and then will say " You're late. Dinner is cold."

Or she'll just blow out the candles, as soon as he gets home, and then walk away. 

[theredhead77]

When moving there are always books and/or photos left haphazardly on the floor and empty hangers in the closet even if the person moving isn't in a rush!to!leave!

[SunnyBeBe]

1 hour ago, theredhead77 said:

When moving there are always books and/or photos left haphazardly on the floor and empty hangers in the closet even if the person moving isn't in a rush!to!leave!

I've never thought about that. I'll have to pay closer attention. What I have wondered about is how when an employee is let go from his job, he just puts his things in one small box and walks out with them.  It would take me at least several boxes.  I mean, with all the stuff I have?  No way that I could easily fit them in one little box.  lol 

[DittyDotDot]

36 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I've never thought about that. I'll have to pay closer attention. What I have wondered about is how when an employee is let go from his job, he just puts his things in one small box and walks out with them.  It would take me at least several boxes.  I mean, with all the stuff I have?  No way that I could easily fit them in one little box.  lol 

See, I wouldn't even need a box. Work is the place I work, not live, so I don't feel the need to have a bunch of personal stuff there. 

[Katy M]

38 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I've never thought about that. I'll have to pay closer attention. What I have wondered about is how when an employee is let go from his job, he just puts his things in one small box and walks out with them.  It would take me at least several boxes.  I mean, with all the stuff I have?  No way that I could easily fit them in one little box.  lol 

The last job I was laid off from, I had a water bottle, a sweater, a spoon, a book, and then I had to get my lunch out of the fridge. I think where I am now, I have a mug and a spoon.  And a Walkman.  OK, Obviously it's not a Walkman, but it's some type of portable thing that you can listen to the radio or a CD on.

I used to eat a lot of yogurt if you're wondering about the spoons.

[SunnyBeBe]

Just now, Katy M said:

The last job I was laid off from, I had a water bottle, a sweater, a spoon, a book, and then I had to get my lunch out of the fridge. I think where I am now, I have a mug and a spoon.  And a Walkman.  OK, Obviously it's not a Walkman, but it's some type of portable thing that you can listen to the radio or a CD on.

I used to eat a lot of yogurt if you're wondering about the spoons.

That's funny. Well, maybe, it's just me on that one.  I have too much stuff, including sweater, jacket, shoes, photos, mugs, bowls, holiday decorations, etc.  If I had to leave, I'd just leave most of it, I suppose. 

[shapeshifter]

I think most people who work in an office On or Off TV would have at least one picture of a family member. It serves the narrative to show the newly-unemployed person either looking sadly at the picture or tossing it carelessly into the box.

Of course, On TV, if there is no picture of a family member in the employee's cubicle or office, the employee is a psychopath or living in WITSEC.

[DittyDotDot]

6 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

Of course, On TV, if there is no picture of a family member in the employee's cubicle or office, the employee is a psychopath or living in WITSEC.

Heh, I wonder which category I would be put in? ;)

[ChromaKelly]

10 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

I think most people who work in an office On or Off TV would have at least one picture of a family member. It serves the narrative to show the newly-unemployed person either looking sadly at the picture or tossing it carelessly into the box.

Of course, On TV, if there is no picture of a family member in the employee's cubicle or office, the employee is a psychopath or living in WITSEC.

Well, if you're married/in a relationship, then you have to have the camera pan to the picture of your SO and/or your family so you can put it face down before you cheat.

[janie jones]

I would fill up at least one box just with books but I also come with a huge book bag so I could probably fit the rest of my stuff in there.

I used to work with someone who had a picture of herself and her daughter on her desk, and I remember thinking it was strange, because I didn't know anyone did that in real life. 

[Katy M]

2 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

I think most people who work in an office On or Off TV would have at least one picture of a family member. It serves the narrative to show the newly-unemployed person either looking sadly at the picture or tossing it carelessly into the box.

Of course, On TV, if there is no picture of a family member in the employee's cubicle or office, the employee is a psychopath or living in WITSEC.

I've never really understood that. I know what my family looks like. I'm not going to forget while I'm at work. When exactly am I supposed to look at this?  While on break?  When I get frustrated?

[Popples]

34 minutes ago, Katy M said:

I've never really understood that. I know what my family looks like. I'm not going to forget while I'm at work. When exactly am I supposed to look at this?  While on break?  When I get frustrated?

Just in case?

[MaryMitch]

When I left my last job, I took out at least 4 boxes of stuff - but then I had worked there 30 years. I had my own coffee maker/coffee/filters, Brita pitcher, about 10 coffee mugs (even though I only used one!), personal photos, my own ergonomic keyboard (I highly recommend this for anyone who types a lot), desk supplies (ok, some of them weren't technically mine), a clock, an electric fan, and lots of those stupid awards that you get for being on "teams".  As long as we kept our cubical relatively neat and clean, we were pretty much allowed to have whatever we wanted in there. I know someone who had their own footstool.

[shapeshifter]

4 hours ago, ChromaKelly said:

Well, if you're married/in a relationship, then you have to have the camera pan to the picture of your SO and/or your family so you can put it face down before you cheat.

Or (on TV), they put the photo face down when they hear that the person in the photo is cheating—once it's proven, of course, the photo gets hurled across the room, the glass shattering. Then the new love interest arrives to help sweep it up. —I'm available if anyone needs a script punched up.

 

1 hour ago, Katy M said:

I've never really understood that. I know what my family looks like. I'm not going to forget while I'm at work. When exactly am I supposed to look at this?  While on break?  When I get frustrated?

Mostly the pictures serve to reassure your TV-watching coworkers thst you're not a psycopath or in WITSEC (see my earlier post), or, in my case, to make it appear as if I'm a devoted mother/daughter.

Edited November 2, 2017 by shapeshifter

[2727]

Re set dressing, let me know if anyone ever sees a child in a school cafeteria without a carton of milk (brand name "Milk") on his or her tray.

[MaryPatShelby]

On 11/1/2017 at 0:40 PM, ChromaKelly said:

Because then the breakfast maker can be hurt and disappointed that the eater did not have time for the lovely breakfast. And also the breakfast eater can humorously grab a pancake or waffle and walk out while holding it and take a bite, talking with their mouth full "mmm this is good! Thanks!"
The breakfast maker will attempt this again by making dinner for her (usually it's the female partner) SO who often works late. She will then sit at a set dinner table with candles burning until the SO gets home and then will say " You're late. Dinner is cold."

Because she somehow forgets, every night, what her partner does for a living.  

On 11/2/2017 at 10:12 AM, janie jones said:

I used to work with someone who had a picture of herself and her daughter on her desk, and I remember thinking it was strange, because I didn't know anyone did that in real life. 

Yikes.  Coming to you from real life, I do have a photo of my and my two adult kids on my desk, amongst other photos that I am not in.  It's an absolute favorite of mine, and I like looking at it.  

Edited November 5, 2017 by MaryPatShelby

[Katy M]

I have a weird story, I think, about pictures on desks.  I worked at this one place, and people had family pictures, but other people also had drawings their kids had done and whatever, so the company made a rule that you were allowed to have one framed photo on your desk and that was it.  So, this one guy had a framed photo on his desk.  It wasn't a family member.  It wasn't a girlfriend.  It was a picture of an actress from a magazine.  But it was in a frame.

[2727]

4 hours ago, Katy M said:

So, this one guy had a framed photo on his desk. It wasn't a family member. It wasn't a girlfriend. It was a picture of an actress from a magazine. But it was in a frame.

I like that guy! (Although I don't know why the shit a company would care what employees have on their desks.)

If people don't keep personal possessions at work, we'd miss all those scenes of them angrily throwing their belongings into a cardboard file box after they're fired.

[legaleagle53]

On 11/2/2017 at 6:37 AM, Katy M said:

The last job I was laid off from, I had a water bottle, a sweater, a spoon, a book, and then I had to get my lunch out of the fridge. I think where I am now, I have a mug and a spoon.  And a Walkman.  OK, Obviously it's not a Walkman, but it's some type of portable thing that you can listen to the radio or a CD on.

A Walkman?  Where are you typing from, 1978?

[Katy M]

6 minutes ago, legaleagle53 said:

A Walkman?  Where are you typing from, 1978?

I said it's obviously not a Walkman, I just don't know what i's called.

[legaleagle53]

Just now, Katy M said:

I said it's obviously not a Walkman, I just don't know what i's called.

I know. I just couldn't resist. ;-)  Nobody under about 50 is even going to know what a Walkman was (although I believe the 2017 equivalent would be an iPod or a smartphone).

[DittyDotDot]

5 minutes ago, legaleagle53 said:

I know. I just couldn't resist. ;-)  Nobody under about 50 is even going to know what a Walkman was (although I believe the 2017 equivalent would be an iPod or a smartphone).

Hey now, I'm under 50 and not only know what one is, but owned one in my youth. ;)

BTW, I think @Katy M might be describing a small portable stereo of some sort and not necessarily a walkman, discman or iPod? Something slightly larger, maybe?

Edited November 5, 2017 by DittyDotDot

[Katy M]

6 minutes ago, legaleagle53 said:

I know. I just couldn't resist. ;-)  Nobody under about 50 is even going to know what a Walkman was (although I believe the 2017 equivalent would be an iPod or a smartphone).

I'm under 50. Not much, but at least 5 years under.  I had one back in high school.  But, this isn't an iPod or a smarthphone. I'm not that advanced:)  It's just a CD player/radio.  It's a few years old.  But, still worked last I checked.  The radio part anyway.

[Jaded]

2 minutes ago, legaleagle53 said:

I know. I just couldn't resist. ;-)  Nobody under about 50 is even going to know what a Walkman was (although I believe the 2017 equivalent would be an iPod or a smartphone).

That's not true about nobody under 50. Walkmans were around well into the 90's. I had one and liked to use my Mom's older one too which I thought worked better. The Walkman name was put onto some of Sony's portable personal CD players which I had one of too. The Walkman I had in the 90's was one of those yellow ones that was supposed to be tougher.

[2727]

Are we just showing things now? Because I thought I was super mod when I got this in 7th grade.

[shapeshifter]

It's beautiful, @2727! I think mine was pink, or maybe green. I would use it to listen to oldies from the 50s under the covers at night. Did Patty Duke or Gidget do that?

[DangerousMinds]

I had a Walkman I would take to the gym until about 2001, when my car was broken into and it was stolen.

[supposebly]

4 hours ago, legaleagle53 said:

I know. I just couldn't resist. ;-)  Nobody under about 50 is even going to know what a Walkman was (although I believe the 2017 equivalent would be an iPod or a smartphone).

Must comment that I too am under 50 (not much though) and used to have a Walkman well into the 90s. While traveling on public transport between my three jobs every day, it was essential. Lifesaving, I would say.

I never had a portable CD player. They were so big!

@DangerousMinds, that makes me sad.

Edited November 6, 2017 by supposebly

[Popples]

4 hours ago, Jaded said:

That's not true about nobody under 50. Walkmans were around well into the 90's. I had one and liked to use my Mom's older one too which I thought worked better. The Walkman name was put onto some of Sony's portable personal CD players which I had one of too. The Walkman I had in the 90's was one of those yellow ones that was supposed to be tougher.

I had that exact same Walkman. When I was in high school, I remember taking it down from the top shelf of my locker and it hit the floor, and was amazed that it didn't break or even crack. It's the reason I stuck with Sony products over Apple when it came to my music.

[biakbiak]

The cassette Walkman was manufactured until 2010 and they still make some products under the name.

[kiddo82]

Weren't the CD players called "Discmen"?  That's what we always called them.  I had that exact same one in the photo when I was in college and I loved it.  I also loved the behind the ears headphones.  And for the record, I used an actual Walkman cassette player into the early 2000s.  Before I could make mixed CD's how else was I supposed to listen to my awesome mixed tape jams?  

Edited November 6, 2017 by kiddo82

[Moose135]

Yes, I think they were Discmen.  I had one, I don't think it was a Sony, probably a cheap, no-name brand, and it had an adapter that went into the cassette slot on the car radio, so you could play CDs over the car's audio system.

[biakbiak]

13 minutes ago, kiddo82 said:

Weren't the CD players called "Discmen"?

When they were first introduced, they later changed the name to CD Walkman.

[shapeshifter]

2 hours ago, kiddo82 said:

Weren't the CD players called "Discmen"?

Since you asked: One is a Discman. Two or more are Discmans.