Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality

[Chaos Theory]

Then again this could be the signal for an alien invasion......

[shapeshifter]

2 hours ago, Katy M said:

If we ALL get superpowers, then nobody has superpowers.

Hence the requirement of first falling into green goo, and then being outside during the eclipse.

[SVNBob]

3 hours ago, kiddo82 said:

Are we all going to receive our superpowers after the eclipse?

[kiddo82]

2 hours ago, Chaos Theory said:

Then again this could be the signal for an alien invasion......

Sarah Michelle Gellar just sent out a tweet telling people to watch out for their mayors today (which is a reference I totally forgot about until I was reminded.  Shame on me.) so we could also be in for a monster/vamp attack.  Good thing some of us will be getting those superpowers.

[Anela]

I'd just appreciate it if HBO Now would work properly on my Roku. It took me two hours to get signed up this morning, after several problems, and now it keeps cutting out, saying it's not supported, stalling, losing the picture but starting to play again, and so on. I'm tempted to cancel now, and just find it GoT online. 

Come on, eclipse. Do your stuff. (I haven't been at all excited about this. I'm just envious of the people travelling to see it.)

Edited August 21, 2017 by Anela

[anna0852]

19 minutes ago, kiddo82 said:

Sarah Michelle Gellar just sent out a tweet telling people to watch out for their mayors today (which is a reference I totally forgot about until I was reminded.  Shame on me.) so we could also be in for a monster/vamp attack.  Good thing some of us will be getting those superpowers.

Love it!

[ramble]

7 hours ago, Katy M said:

You totally live in my town, don't you?  Yo were the one skipping down the street a couple of years ago singing "I have a magic wand."

Yes that was me! Lol. Unfortunately I have yet to see my super powers manifest, and, disappointingly, I didn't even have to storm out in emergency mode. A few people at work had glasses and we all took turns going out and looking. At least the other office in our building had a party for the eclipse. Build your own sundae. Yes! Of course if I was on tv I'd fix my sundae but never really eat it. Maybe stare at it moodily or take one small bite. Forget that mess! I'm eating it. 

Edited August 21, 2017 by ramble

[Anela]

5 minutes ago, ramble said:

Yes that was me! Lol. Unfortunately I have yet to see my super powers manifest, and, disappointingly, I didn't even have to storm out in emergency mode. A few people at work had glasses and we all took turns going out and looking. At least the other office in our building had a party for the eclipse. Build your own sundae. Yes! Of course if I was on tv I'd fix my sundae but never really eat it. Maybe stare at it moodily or take one small bite. Forget that mess! I'm eating it. 

I hate how people on TV rarely get to actually eat what they've ordered. I know the reason when it comes to filming, but it bugs me to see a beautiful plate of food, only for them to rush out of the door for some reason. Or to be distracted in another way. 

[Katy M]

28 minutes ago, Anela said:

I hate how people on TV rarely get to actually eat what they've ordered. I know the reason when it comes to filming, but it bugs me to see a beautiful plate of food, only for them to rush out of the door for some reason. Or to be distracted in another way. 

At least the not eating has a valid production reason.  I hate how people hardly ever seem to pay for their food.  Yes, I know sometimes they do, but a lot of times they don't.

[shapeshifter]

An awful lot of crime victims on TV have no living parents or siblings.

[SVNBob]

13 hours ago, Anela said:

I'd just appreciate it if HBO Now would work properly on my Roku.

I got an e-mail earlier today from Roku saying they were doing some planned maintenance on Wednesday this week and that it would interfere with some functionality.  So either you got caught in an early maintenance fix, or encountered something that the maintenance might be solving.

[Anela]

5 hours ago, SVNBob said:

I got an e-mail earlier today from Roku saying they were doing some planned maintenance on Wednesday this week and that it would interfere with some functionality.  So either you got caught in an early maintenance fix, or encountered something that the maintenance might be solving.

Thank you. I googled and saw that a lot of people have had problems with the two. I had expected to get the free month through cable, so this has been a hassle - it would have been easier to look it up online somewhere, and hook my laptop up to the TV. The roku started to work properly for a little while, then crapped out completely. My batteries suddenly stopped working. 

Sorry for the off-topic. 

[Katy M]

15 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

An awful lot of crime victims on TV have no living parents or siblings.

Well, to be fair, if I were going to target someone, I would target someone who seemed lonely.

[shapeshifter]

1 hour ago, Katy M said:

Well, to be fair, if I were going to target someone, I would target someone who seemed lonely.

True. But IRL most criminals are not as smart as you and I are. At least, that's what I heard Sue Grafton say in an interview yesterday touting her 25th murder mystery novel.   ;-)

[ChromaKelly]

On 8/21/2017 at 4:28 PM, Katy M said:

At least the not eating has a valid production reason.  I hate how people hardly ever seem to pay for their food.  Yes, I know sometimes they do, but a lot of times they don't.

If they do pay, it's via slamming some money down on the table.

[ZuluQueenOfDwarves]

The previouslies for The Bold Type reminded me of a trope I've seen a lot lately, with Girls being the biggest offender: bestest platonic girl friends bathing in front of/with each other, in tiny, single-person bathtubs. I've been known to shower while roommates/sisters used the bathroom sink, but the curtain was always drawn for privacy. I've been in hot tubs with friends, but never a bath. All baths I've ever had in adulthood were either solo efforts in relaxation or sexytimes with romantic partners. 

[Bastet]

5 minutes ago, ZuluQueenOfDwarves said:

The previouslies for The Bold Type reminded me of a trope I've seen a lot lately, with Girls being the biggest offender: bestest platonic girl friends bathing in front of/with each other, in tiny, single-person bathtubs.

My best friend being in the bathroom while I was in the tub wouldn't bother either of us, but being in the tub together?  That has not happened since we were about six.  I've sat here for several minutes now trying to think of a scenario in which we'd opt to share a bath, and can't.  We have zero issue being naked in front of each other, or anything like that, but why would we cram ourselves into a bathtub together?  I'm intrigued that best friends sharing a bath is apparently a thing among TV characters now.

[Anela]

I wouldn't have any friend or family member in the bathroom with me. I remember a family friend bursting into the bathroom when I was showering, and I freaked out. Dad put a bolt on the door that same day. 

[ChromaKelly]

Married/romantic couples use the toilet in front of each other and brush their teeth at the same time. Maybe people really do this? IDK, I like privacy in the bathroom. I don't even like my husband coming in while I'm washing up, brushing teeth, doing my hair. I'm like, can you wait?
Also reminds me of people on TV walking all around the bedroom while brushing their teeth. Looking out the window, talking, etc.

[biakbiak]

20 minutes ago, ChromaKelly said:

o reminds me of people on TV walking all around the bedroom while brushing their teeth. Looking out the window, talking, etc.

I do this all the time.

[2727]

If a TV character is shown using the toilet while someone else is in the bathroom or if they leave door open, it's usually meant to indicate that said character (almost unilaterally the husband/boyfriend) is a gross fratboy and we won't be surprised when his girlfriend dumps him later in the show. On the rare occasions it's a woman, she's likely to be drunk or a druggie. If millennials do it, who knows. All bets are off with those kids.

When someone on TV uses/flushes the toilet while another person is in the shower, we can expect a yelp from the shower-er due to the change in water temperature. (Even in modern houses where that doesn't happen.)

[Katy M]

While we all know that everybody goes to the bathroom, is it really ever a plot point that we need to see it? Or see it alluded to, I guess.  I don't think I've ever actually seen anyone use the toilet on TV.  Thank goodness.

[Bastet]

3 hours ago, ChromaKelly said:

Married/romantic couples use the toilet in front of each other and brush their teeth at the same time. Maybe people really do this?

According to House Hunters, all couples brush their teeth at the same time, because the buyers are constantly on about needing two sinks in the bathroom.

I wouldn't care if a partner needed to come in the bathroom while I was using it, but I wouldn't want one routinely in there with me.  That sounds like being stalked in your own home.

[ganesh]

I never had a problem with being walked in on in the bathroom or vice versa. 

[Shannon L.]

When you only have one bathroom and 4 people needing to get ready at the same time, you have to get used to sharing.  My husband and I have no problem sharing the bathroom, if necessary.  If we can wait, we wait.  Also, my son and husband have been known to be in there while one is in the shower and the same with me and my daughter.  We just don't do a brother/sister or mother/son or father/daughter scenario. 

[meep.meep]

3 hours ago, Katy M said:

While we all know that everybody goes to the bathroom, is it really ever a plot point that we need to see it? Or see it alluded to, I guess.  I don't think I've ever actually seen anyone use the toilet on TV.  Thank goodness.

Don't ever watch the opening credits for Shameless.

It's a frequent plot point.  Off the top of my head, from Seinfeld, How I Met Your Mother, Transparent, All in the Family, Prime Suspect. Game of Thrones

[auntlada]

9 hours ago, ChromaKelly said:

Married/romantic couples use the toilet in front of each other and brush their teeth at the same time. Maybe people really do this? IDK, I like privacy in the bathroom. I don't even like my husband coming in while I'm washing up, brushing teeth, doing my hair. I'm like, can you wait?
Also reminds me of people on TV walking all around the bedroom while brushing their teeth. Looking out the window, talking, etc.

That's why all the house makeover shows have to have double vanities (or what @Bastet said. I don't really want anyone in the bathroom with me. I think it's a result of growing up in a family of five with one main bathroom and one small bathroom with toilet, sink and shower -- and having no locks on doors except the main bathroom. The bathroom is my private space when I am in there. I'd rather have more counter space than two sinks.

6 hours ago, Katy M said:

While we all know that everybody goes to the bathroom, is it really ever a plot point that we need to see it? Or see it alluded to, I guess.  I don't think I've ever actually seen anyone use the toilet on TV.  Thank goodness.

Grey's Anatomy. It was part of why Izzie didn't like Callie. She came in and used the bathroom while others were in there brushing their teeth or something. And it was shown, or as much as you can show on broadcast TV.

[shapeshifter]

8 hours ago, Bastet said:

According to House Hunters, all couples brush their teeth at the same time, because the buyers are constantly on about needing two sinks in the bathroom.

There's a TV commercial airing these days selling a multi-sink vanity (maybe for Lowe's?) that shows Mom and Dad waiting with their towels and toothbrushes while the 2 kids are making a mess of the only bathroom sink. It's a great selling point for families who are trying to get ready in the morning, but having done it with and without multiple sinks and/or bathrooms, IMO, showering at night and brushing my teeth in the kitchen in the morning while one or more teens use the bathroom is just as good. 

I never see anyone cleaning the sink or toilet on TV.

[Popples]

12 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

I never see anyone cleaning the sink or toilet on TV.

The only person I remember seeing cleaning the toilet was Bree from Desperate Housewives. It was only to set up how meticulous she was about order, because it looked like she was trying to scrub the porcelain off.

[2727]

Not exactly the same, but there are a lot of scenes on TV/movies set in public restrooms. Maybe first popularized by Ally McBeal?

A lot goes on in fictional bathrooms, some of it actually related to elimination. There are the gross noises, smells, "private" discussions that are overheard, sex, disguise changes, hiding in the stalls, illicit smoking, girl talk, swirlies, etc. Urinal humor and the male sideways glance is a genre of its own, as are airplane bathroom shenanigans.

None of it has ever happened to me with the exception of once asking a neighboring stall user to pass me some TP!

Edited August 25, 2017 by 2727

[DittyDotDot]

10 minutes ago, 2727 said:

None of it has ever happened to me with the exception of once asking a neighboring stall user to pass me some TP!

Can you spare a square? ;)

[Bastet]

Cagney and Lacey used to regularly meet in the women's restroom at the precinct; behind the scenes, they called it "The Jane" and on the show, if Mary Beth said, "Conference, Christine," that meant meet me in the bathroom so we can talk.  They were the only women on the squad, so it was where they could talk in private.

My So-Called Life set a lot of scenes in the girls restroom, which was a pretty accurate reflection of high school.

[Danny Franks]

On 23/08/2017 at 0:15 AM, ChromaKelly said:

If they do pay, it's via slamming some money down on the table.

I love it when people are either drunk or emotionally troubled, and instead of paying their tab in a bar, they just casually throw an indeterminate amount of money onto the bartop and stagger out. Presumably it's to show how little they care about money when they have other, far more pressing concerns in their life. I just can't help but think, 'what if your dramatic gesture shortchanged that poor bartender who's been keeping your miserable arse plied with drinks all night?'

[Katy M]

3 hours ago, Danny Franks said:

I love it when people are either drunk or emotionally troubled, and instead of paying their tab in a bar, they just casually throw an indeterminate amount of money onto the bartop and stagger out. Presumably it's to show how little they care about money when they have other, far more pressing concerns in their life. I just can't help but think, 'what if your dramatic gesture shortchanged that poor bartender who's been keeping your miserable arse plied with drinks all night?'

On the other hand, maybe they tipped the bartender $200.

[Calvada]

We've discussed at length grocery shopping by TV characters - always buying the loaf of French bread, carrots with the tops, milk by the quart for large TV families, and so on.  The one thing that confuses me is that when we see people come in with their groceries, they are never carrying six or 12 or 24-packs of beer and soda.  Yet all these people seem to have an endless supply of bottles of beer or soda in their refrigerators.  Thus I have a question:  where can I buy one of those refrigerators that seems to self-generate bottled beverages?  I've never seen one at my local Sears.  

[Chaos Theory]

On 8/24/2017 at 11:24 AM, Popples said:

The only person I remember seeing cleaning the toilet was Bree from Desperate Housewives. It was only to set up how meticulous she was about order, because it looked like she was trying to scrub the porcelain off.

I let that one go because toilets have only been on tv for the last few decades.   You expect people to clean them now?  

[Anela]

When someone is gazing at a loved one/friend dying in battle, as others fight all around them. They are somehow left alone until they're ready to move.

[shapeshifter]

7 hours ago, Chaos Theory said:

I let that one go because toilets have only been on tv for the last few decades.   You expect people to clean them now?  

Heh. But I suspect a lot of writers have just never cleaned toilets and don't realize that they are missing out on great potential for interpersonal relationship exposition. For instance, I still recall having just cleaned the toilet when my drunk ex came home and vomitted in and all over it. 

[Joe]

22 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

Heh. But I suspect a lot of writers have just never cleaned toilets and don't realize that they are missing out on great potential for interpersonal relationship exposition. For instance, I still recall having just cleaned the toilet when my drunk ex came home and vomitted in and all over it. 

I'm guessing that's why they're your ex?

[Cobalt Stargazer]

14 hours ago, Chaos Theory said:

I let that one go because toilets have only been on tv for the last few decades.   You expect people to clean them now?  

I think it was The Brady Bunch that had the first toilet on TV< but I could be wrong.

[Snow Apple]

20 hours ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

I think it was The Brady Bunch that had the first toilet on TV< but I could be wrong.

No, years after the show aired, viewers noticed six children sharing one bathroom with no toilet.

I think I've seen people cleaning toilets on sitcoms but it's usually in the context of a joke or plot.

[ChromaKelly]

On 9/2/2017 at 2:30 PM, Calvada said:

We've discussed at length grocery shopping by TV characters - always buying the loaf of French bread, carrots with the tops, milk by the quart for large TV families, and so on.  The one thing that confuses me is that when we see people come in with their groceries, they are never carrying six or 12 or 24-packs of beer and soda.  Yet all these people seem to have an endless supply of bottles of beer or soda in their refrigerators.  Thus I have a question:  where can I buy one of those refrigerators that seems to self-generate bottled beverages?  I've never seen one at my local Sears.  

If they are a Lonely Single Man, they will only have the six pack of beer, ketchup, and Chinese leftovers in the fridge.

[meep.meep]

On 9/2/2017 at 11:30 AM, Calvada said:

We've discussed at length grocery shopping by TV characters - always buying the loaf of French bread, carrots with the tops, milk by the quart for large TV families, and so on.  The one thing that confuses me is that when we see people come in with their groceries, they are never carrying six or 12 or 24-packs of beer and soda.  Yet all these people seem to have an endless supply of bottles of beer or soda in their refrigerators.  Thus I have a question:  where can I buy one of those refrigerators that seems to self-generate bottled beverages?  I've never seen one at my local Sears.  

Wasn't there a Superbowl ad a few years ago that featured such a magic frig? 

[shapeshifter]

I think this always happens on TV and at least does not always happen in real life:
An accomplice or undercover victim will be wearing "a wire" to record the evil doer gloating about his/her exploits, and literally moments before the cops arrive to take down the evil doer, the evil doer will rip open the shirt of the poor mope* wearing the wire and come this close to killing him/her.

 

*"poor mope" ™ Lennie Briscoe, Fin Tutuola, et al.

[ParadoxLost]

Never once have I had a gathering of family or friends for a meal where we just happened to reenact the Last Supper.

[Katy M]

38 minutes ago, ParadoxLost said:

Never once have I had a gathering of family or friends for a meal where we just happened to reenact the Last Supper.

Um, I don't know that I have ever seen that on TV either.

[ParadoxLost]

7 minutes ago, Katy M said:

Um, I don't know that I have ever seen that on TV either.

OUAT and Killjoys finales this season.

Apparently its also a trope.

Edited September 17, 2017 by ParadoxLost

[caci]

Walking in a wooded area today made me think of this one.  Every sound in the woods is always made by a person hiding or stalking another character. The stalked person then asks, "is anybody there?" because the  sound couldn't be made by squirrels, chipmunks, deer, falling fruit, branches etc. (esp. in the fall).  Seriously, the woods on tv must be the quietest places on earth. On the other extreme, you'll  get the tv outdoorsman who seems to know automatically if a sound is made by a forest creature or a person.  Maybe this one is true.  I don't hunt so I don't know.

[kiddo82]

Not that this doesn't happen in real life, but on TV all wedding ceremonies are about ten minutes long.  Procession in.  Dearly beloved.  Vows.  Rings.  Does anybody object? (It's TV so someone may or may not).  I now pronounce you... Bride and Groom kiss.  Process Out.  Now, I understand why they don't show the "love is patient.  Love is kind" part (and not every church wedding, even in real life, is a mass) but it's just funny how every TV wedding follows the same exact formula no matter the customs of the people getting married.  There was that one episode of 30 Rock where Liz did the reading at her ex's wedding but something like that is a rare exception.  

Edited September 20, 2017 by kiddo82

[Shannon L.]

When a person decides to make your life hell for no reason (or a stupid reason), it becomes your main goal in life to make them like you.  I say try to be nice a couple of times and if they are still going to make your life hell, then fuck 'em.  If, over the course of the next several weeks or months, they somehow come around to realizing that you're not all that bad and they start treating you nicer, then bonus, but I don't think it's necessary to bend over backwards to make them like you, but on tv it's what characters live for!