Season 1 Discussion

[CoachWristletJen]

Paul says he's just glad nobody was hurt or killed. Already he's manipulating by minimizing the situation.

Then he says he can't forgive himself. Oh, please, save it, Paul! You just want her back in your bed.

This guy makes Mo look like a choir boy.

BTW, nice cross necklace.

[Granny58]

32 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

If I recall correctly, Larry is Jewish. So, no, he really couldn't have eaten any of the pig. And where do you get the bolded part from? McDonald's burgers are actually beef; highly processed beef, but they're still beef. So even if he eats at McDonald's, provided he's not having the McRib, then he's still not eating pork.

Was his religion mentioned?  I don't recall that.  So that does make sense, however, is pretty relevant in life and SHOULD have already been known by Jenny.   BTW, agree about McDonalds.  

[Flowergirl81]

Quote

If I recall correctly, Larry is Jewish. So, no, he really couldn't have eaten any of the pig.

Do we have any evidence that Larry is indeed Jewish?  Because I’m pretty sure he “crossed himself” before eating the pork.  Also if he’s actually Jewish he should have mentioned it at the family dinner, or at least afterward to Jenny so that she’d understand his reasoning.  Can somebody supply “receipts” that prove Larry is Jewish?

[jennyf]

I don’t know if Larry is Jewish or not, but I’m also Jewish and I eat bacon and other pork products as well as shellfish. Many reform and non-practicing Jews do the same. Not eating those things are part of the stricter rules of religion. I think Larry was just being a wuss. 

[TwirlyGirly]

38 minutes ago, CoachWristletJen said:

You make some really good points here. I get that Larry is Jewish, but when he wasn't eating the meat, he didn't say anything about that. He talked about his intestines. I might be wrong here, but I got the impression that it was more about his physical wellbeing than his religious convictions.

And, he still didn't get that he was SO RUDE.

He's not a very bright man.

It was such a kick in the teeth to Jenny's poor family. And, Larry just didn't get it.

What's the learning curve like for this guy, anyway?

I didn't know Larry is Jewish! But even if he is, not all Jews keep kosher. If he does, that's a pretty important part of his life, so why the heck wasn't that something he ever discussed with Jenny? Pork is a big part of the diet in many cultures (Mexico, the Caribbean, Latin and South America, Asia, the Philippines, etc.) so you would think 1) Larry would be aware of that, having learned something about the culture before going to meet Jenny, and 2) communicating his religion-based dietary restrictions to her prior to arriving.

Oh wait. Silly me. I'm thinking about what people of average intelligence would most likely do prior to visiting someone who lives in a different country. My bad.

Furthermore, the Philippines have a Muslim population of between 5.57% and 11% (depending upon who you ask), and Muslims don't eat pork either, so I doubt Jenny would have had an issue if Larry's religious beliefs preclude him from eating pork. Not eating pork is not a concept totally unheard of in the Philippines.

Edited October 9, 2017 by TwirlyGirly

[Emmeline]

9 hours ago, Eme said:

Patrick - So DUN with him.  All I can see is his BabyMama, stuck permanently in the Friend Zone, looking hurt that he's heading for Paris to a New Gal.  Really?  Karma is rough and we are all watching with the popcorn.  Marium is enjoying the attention, and had no interest in him.  IF she has a BF, she told him about Patrick only to try to get him jealous, and he's either not jealous at all, or else he's bugged and giving her the silent treatment.  Their story is annoying and the only ending I would like to see is Patrick going back to the BabyMama and putting some Serious Effort into making that family work.  Sheesh.

Larry - the look on his face as he gingerly took a bite of the pork then immediately ripped it out of his mouth, all the while sweating up a storm.....seriously?  I saw that delish looking pork and thought "Man!  That skin looks nice and crunchy....YUMM!"  He has zero social graces, and while Jenny looks to be in it for the green card, it seems like she thought he had a tiny bit of manners and was shocked and dismayed to realize that she's stuck with an social idiot.  I am guessing her Mom is in the Middle East as a domestic.  My heart breaks for her in not seeing her Mom for 3 years.  Larry should have taken one look at that home and insisted on using his 401K to get them BEDS and some some minor comforts instead of judging them and leaving.  He is useless. On the other hand, if she gets a grip on his financial situation, she may just dodge a bullet when she realizes that his income will not allow them to help her family financially....so there is 

Karine needs to get a person to translate what is going on...she will never understand with his "pat" answers "someone accused me of burning my personal belongings for insurance fraud."  WHAT?  There is a LOT to unpack there and without a translator, she is hopeless of getting close to the real story.  It sounded like she wanted to move forward and forget about the machete mugging, his abandoning her in a dangerous area, and avoiding talking about this past...this could work out for him....but she is making a serious mistake in not getting a translator to help her make that decision.

I completely agree with you on this point.  I had been thinking for some time it would be difficult for Karine to understand the arson and insurance fraud as well as the restraining order.  Considering her rural background, Paul’s crimes can’t be something she is very familiar with.  The translators are not completely accurate either.

[Chickabiddy]

As the daughter of a French woman and the wife to a German man for 20 years, I gotta defend Europeans about the comment upthread that all Europeans are lazy?!? Sweeping generalization much? All the Europeans I have ever associated with have been well educated and hardworking. Thanks. Just had to get that off my chest. :-) 

Larry sucks. That is all. I don't care what the fueckety fuck Larry's issues are with pork or pig or pig's head; he could have been a damn sight more gracious about it. I know this has all been said, but my heart just broke when Jenny said that having a lechon was a special occasion, and that last time they had one when was she was a little kid.  Like once in 10 years?!? This came on top of knowing that Jenny has not seen her mother in three years. Can you imagine the burden that young girl feels to try to do her part to lift her family out of poverty? 

I am officially Team Jenny all the way now. Larry could have stayed in his end of the ocean and found some nice girl close to home, but no, Larry decided to go all exotic and bride shop on the other side of the world when he knows that he is the most unadventurous, untraveled, unaware of the outside world  person I have ever seen. You refuse to stay in your lane, you get what you deserve. Paul, criminal doofus that he is, managed to do some research on where he was going...maybe too much, but better than zilch, null, nada, zero. 

[Dobian]

I guess Larry's never been to a luau before, that's always the centerpiece.  It's a freaking pig!  Hey Larry, where do you think your pulled pork sandwich came from?  Or your side of bacon?  What an idiot.

I can't even watch Patrick, I want to smack him through the tv screen.  This chick isn't into you, dude.  When she spends your time with her lamenting that she loves her boyfriend and he isn't paying her enough attention instead of saying screw my bf, I have Patrick here..SHE'S NOT INTO YOU!!!  She sees you as her girlfriend now.  She put you in her friend zone, and you let her get away with it, so now she sees you as her bff to give her the attention her boyfriend doesn't.  She's using you, you dope.

Sean is just stupid beyond words.

All of these guys are just an embarrassment to men everywhere.

This show feels so manipulative.  I can see all of these stories resolving into some improbable "happy ending".

[MrSmith]

Well, I might be remembering incorrectly (regarding Larry being Jewish). I'll try to find a clip later today when I have time.

[Sprockets]

1 hour ago, CoachWristletJen said:

 

I didn't realize that he was Jewish. He should have explained that instead of just sitting there with a stupid look on his face.

 

Uh yeah, communication.  He only had about a bazillion chances to explain himself.  And nothing.  

10 minutes ago, Chickabiddy said:

I gotta defend Europeans about the comment upthread that all Europeans are lazy?!? Sweeping generalization much? All the Europeans I have ever associated with have been well educated and hardworking. Thanks. Just had to get that off my chest. :

All the Europeans I've met - and I lived in Europe for several years - are indivuals, some of whom are lazy, others loyal, others hard-working, etc.  Like people everywhere.  

11 minutes ago, Dobian said:

SHE'S NOT INTO YOU!!!  She sees you as her girlfriend now.  She put you in her friend zone, and you let her get away with it, so now she sees you as her bff to give her the attention her boyfriend doesn't. 

I see her playing games with Patrick.  She knows he is into her, so why discuss her boyfriend with him?  

[Dobian]

4 minutes ago, Sprockets said:

I see her playing games with Patrick.  She knows he is into her, so why discuss her boyfriend with him?  

Patrick gets to listen to her problems while her bf gets to go to bed with her.  Nice deal you signed up for, Patrick.

Didn't know Larry was Jewish either.  Nice job passing along that information, show.  At least you could have had him discuss it in his confessional session.

[Chickabiddy]

4 minutes ago, Sprockets said:

Uh yeah, communication.  He only had about a bazillion chances to explain himself.  And nothing.  

All the Europeans I've met - and I lived in Europe for several years - are indivuals, some of whom are lazy, others loyal, others hard-working, etc.  Like people everywhere.  

I see her playing games with Patrick.  She knows he is into her, so why discuss her boyfriend with him?  

Right, so I didn't appreciate the sweeping generalization and thought I would share my own experience. ;-) 

[AZChristian]

7 minutes ago, Dobian said:

Didn't know Larry was Jewish either.  Nice job passing along that information, show.  At least you could have had him discuss it in his confessional session.

With a last name like Passariello, and his crossing of himself before he put that tiny bite of pork into his mouth, I think it's unlikely that he's Jewish.

[PamelaMaeSnap]

1 hour ago, Flowergirl81 said:

Do we have any evidence that Larry is indeed Jewish?  Because I’m pretty sure he “crossed himself” before eating the pork.  Also if he’s actually Jewish he should have mentioned it at the family dinner, or at least afterward to Jenny so that she’d understand his reasoning.  Can somebody supply “receipts” that prove Larry is Jewish?

He absolutely crossed himself before eating the pork. His last name is Passariello so at the very least he's Italian. Not that there are not Italian Jews but I don't think he's one of them unless, POSSIBLY, an earlier wife was Jewish (or were his sons both OOW?) and he had to convert. 

ETA: I wrote longer than AZChristian so sorry for the overlap! :)

I never thought I'd defend Larry in any way on here, and this is not really a defense per se, BUT ... I am not a vegetarian and there are few things I love more than barbecued pork (and FWIW I'm Jewish LOL) ... however, I don't really like being reminded of what my meal looked like before it was put on my plate (sorry, sorry, sorry) and the whole ceremony of unveiling the very dead piggy would have been a little rough for me but then taking the axes and chopping it to bits made me queasy just watching. I don't know if I could have eaten it after watching that.

Not to say there weren't a ton of better ways to deal with it if in fact that's what made him unable to eat ... but most of us are probably a little better at coming up with good, reasonably respectful excuses than Larry. I think he was such a nervous wreck already about meeting FatherJenny (what WAS with that bowing and genuflecting?) that with his limited social skills they all flew right out the window. 

At least he tried to be nice. VERY similar situation, IMHO, to the chicken feet. Wish they'd come up with a new storyline to highlight "cultural food differences that ugly American can't deal with."

Also, re: Patrick's escapades at the bottom of the Sacre Coeur stairs, I actually got a huge kick out of that because that expanse is probably the biggest free stage for every street performer in Paris ... was just looking at old photos of my trip there in 2009 and my favorite memory was a young African street performer who walked on his hands while doing amazing tricks with a soccer ball with his feet. Patrick would fit in well there but he'd be overshadowed by better performers. That said, he's by far my favorite of the 90DF suitors for this particular batch. 

Edited October 9, 2017 by PamelaMaeSnap
To add that AZC and I think alike but I'm blabbier

[AZChristian]

1 minute ago, PamelaMaeSnap said:

I think he was such a nervous wreck already about meeting FatherJenny (what WAS with that bowing and genuflecting?) that with his limited social skills they all flew right out the window. 

. . . 

Also, re: Patrick's escapades at the bottom of the Sacre Coeur stairs, I actually got a huge kick out of that because that expanse is probably the biggest free stage for every street performer in Paris ... was just looking at old photos of my trip there in 2009 and my favorite memory was a young African street performer who walked on his hands while doing amazing tricks with a soccer ball with his feet. Patrick would fit in well there but he'd be overshadowed by better performers. That said, he's by far my favorite of the 90DF suitors for this particular batch. 

I googled his bowing, and found that it was probably his version of a Philippine practice of showing respect to elders.  At least he tried with that - although FatherJenny looked a bit askance at him.  

. . . 

I kept wanting the camera to pan out and show more of Sacre Coeur and less of Patrick.  We, too, visited there.  The only thing more beautiful than the outside was the inside.  

[TwirlyGirly]

17 minutes ago, Chickabiddy said:

<snip> Paul, criminal doofus that he is, managed to do some research on where he was going...maybe too much, but better than zilch, null, nada, zero. 

Yes, but all of Paul's research seems to have been centered on what hazards could befall HIM on his trip, and made preparations/brought supplies to avoid those hazards. He seems to have done little to no research into Karine's culture, or learned any of the language - things that are imperative to developing a relationship with Karine and understanding her, her family, and the circumstances in which she lives. Everything pertaining to building a strong relationship as a couple was ignored, IMHO.

It was all about him. 

I understand from Paul's POV he's had some bad relationships in the past (and from his perspective, HE was the victim in those relationships), so he's in self-protect mode. He's said as much multiple times. But if he cared about Karine as much as he claims he does, he'd see the person who has the most to lose in this situation is Karine, not himself. Look around, Paul! Of the two of you, which one has the most resources? You can hop on a plane and go back to mama anytime you want. If Karine comes back to America with you, can she hop a plane back to Brazil and the safety of HER family at a moment's notice if your relationship goes south? No. She's young, she's naïve, not well-educated, and has no resources - a woman who would be living in a country where she doesn't know the language, in a culture completely foreign to her, with no support system whatsoever. Karine would be entirely dependent on Paul (and that weird mother of his), and have no one to turn to, nowhere to run, if things were to go bad. And, judging from Paul's behavior thus far, the odds are not in Karine's favor.

[Chickabiddy]

12 minutes ago, TwirlyGirly said:

Yes, but all of Paul's research seems to have been centered on what hazards could befall HIM on his trip, and made preparations/brought supplies to avoid those hazards. He seems to have done little to no research into Karine's culture, or learned any of the language - things that are imperative to developing a relationship with Karine and understanding her, her family, and the circumstances in which she lives. Everything pertaining to building a strong relationship as a couple was ignored, IMHO.

It was all about him. 

I understand from Paul's POV he's had some bad relationships in the past (and from his perspective, HE was the victim in those relationships), so he's in self-protect mode. He's said as much multiple times. But if he cared about Karine as much as he claims he does, he'd see the person who has the most to lose in this situation is Karine, not himself. Look around, Paul! Of the two of you, which one has the most resources? You can hop on a plane and go back to mama anytime you want. If Karine comes back to America with you, can she hop a plane back to Brazil and the safety of HER family at a moment's notice if your relationship goes south? No. She's young, she's naïve, not well-educated, and has no resources - a woman who would be living in a country where she doesn't know the language, in a culture completely foreign to her, with no support system whatsoever. Karine would be entirely dependent on Paul (and that weird mother of his), and have no one to turn to, nowhere to run, if things were to go bad. And, judging from Paul's behavior thus far, the odds are not in Karine's favor.

Just to be clear, I was not lauding Paul for his efforts, nor am I a fan; I only wanted  to point out that Larry didn't do ANY research, and his SIL in is from the Philippines?!?!

[Palomar]

10 hours ago, Northernlights said:

Jenny is growing on me too!  In all fairness, of course she's talked to a lot of other guys.  Didn't we all before we landed on the right one?  Doesn't make her a bad person.  And she may not show a lot of emotion.  Some people just don't. 

I used to be on Team Larry, but not after tonight.  He blew right past uber doofus straight to ignorant dick tonight!  These people have literally NOTHING and they tried to honor him with a special meal which he turned up his snotty little nose at.  Like he's too good to eat that?  Whatever.  Jackass.

Jenny contacted lots of guys until one actually stuck.  Unfortunately for her it was Larry.  What you see is what you get.

I do understand the reluctance of Larry to eat the pig.  It really turns me off to see the entire pig, head and all, myself.  However, the meat itself IS delicious if you get the vision of the pigs head out of your thoughts.  Regardless, he should have eaten a generous portion and been very complimentary and thankful for the meal that this family presented to him which they mentioned they only do for special occasions.

To be honest, I've always thought that Larry was mentally challenged. There are many mentally challenged people who function in the everyday world (I have a family member who is mentally challenged and holds down a job and is married) but they are not always aware of social situations. Larry really is one of those.  I don't think he had any idea he was being rude....he just tells it like it is.  There is no way Jenny will have the patience to be married to someone like Larry.  But, she might just go ahead with a marriage and get the green card and take off....he is ripe to be taken advantage of that is for sure.

[balisticnikki]

I'm not going to bash Larry for not eating the pig. I'm a vegetarian & I think that's gross. But i know plenty of omnivires who would also find it gross, for various reasons. Just like the Americans are expected to adapt to the nonAmerican customs, the nonAmericans need to adapt as well. I seriously doubt the family would be that offended by a foreigner not wanting the food. Did Jenny discuss this feast with him beforehand? I just hope the family didn't pay for the food.

[wovenloaf]

7 hours ago, Hellohappylife said:

I’m not convinced the whole mugging situation went down. It’s Too much like a cheesy romantic movie, The guy reveals a flaw to the girl,the girl begs that she loves him no matter what. The guy runs off ashamed,she chases after. He pushes away,she leaves alone & then surprise surprise,she’s robbed & he wasn’t there to “protect” her (no one with a machete would be afraid of Paul,hell even with out they wouldn’t)

Mr. Wovenloaf and I both actually laughed out loud when Paul lamented that he wasn't there to "protect and defend" Karine.  I suspect the machete guy might have done the same (then chopped off his arm or something) if Paul tried.

 

As for Larry, I thought he was outrageously rude.  And I felt bad for Jenny and her family that they were treated that way. 

Edited October 9, 2017 by wovenloaf

[bichonblitz]

2 hours ago, MrSmith said:

If I recall correctly, Larry is Jewish. So, no, he really couldn't have eaten any of the pig

The thing is he was making grossed out faces, sweating and gagging at the mere sight of the pork on his plate. That part had nothing to do with his religion. Just plain ignorance. 

I felt so sorry for the family. Jenny said the pig is very expensive there and the family could hardly ever afford it. They obviously went above and beyond to be gracious to Larry and were so proud to be able to do so. Personally, I like pork but the sight of a whole one roasting has always turned me off and then the head being chopped off would have sickened me, but I would have sucked it up and gotten over it to please this nice family that went out of their way to welcome me.  Larry is a classless asshat. 

[CoachWristletJen]

49 minutes ago, TwirlyGirly said:

Yes, but all of Paul's research seems to have been centered on what hazards could befall HIM on his trip, and made preparations/brought supplies to avoid those hazards. He seems to have done little to no research into Karine's culture, or learned any of the language - things that are imperative to developing a relationship with Karine and understanding her, her family, and the circumstances in which she lives. Everything pertaining to building a strong relationship as a couple was ignored, IMHO.

It was all about him. 

I understand from Paul's POV he's had some bad relationships in the past (and from his perspective, HE was the victim in those relationships), so he's in self-protect mode. He's said as much multiple times. But if he cared about Karine as much as he claims he does, he'd see the person who has the most to lose in this situation is Karine, not himself. Look around, Paul! Of the two of you, which one has the most resources? You can hop on a plane and go back to mama anytime you want. If Karine comes back to America with you, can she hop a plane back to Brazil and the safety of HER family at a moment's notice if your relationship goes south? No. She's young, she's naïve, not well-educated, and has no resources - a woman who would be living in a country where she doesn't know the language, in a culture completely foreign to her, with no support system whatsoever. Karine would be entirely dependent on Paul (and that weird mother of his), and have no one to turn to, nowhere to run, if things were to go bad. And, judging from Paul's behavior thus far, the odds are not in Karine's favor.

Paul has to protect himself because he's a selfish, selfish a$$Hole. He doesn't have the insight to see what he's done wrong in the relationship so it's all about his being wounded and rejected.

Karine is a about 14 years younger than he is and she's had very limited exposure to a lot of things; she's the perfect kind of girl for Paul to control and manipulate. It's hard to watch sometimes.

I know I'm basically just restating what you just said. I shouldn't be shocked by what a jerk Paul continues to be, but I am. And, I'm so worried about Karine!

Can you get a K1 if you're a Felon? Let's hope not.

I found this. "The International Marriage Broker Regulation Act requires that fiancées be given a brochure about domestic violence, and requires that American petitioners who have been convicted of certain crimes of violence, abuse or multiple crimes involving drugs declare this on the petition, among other things." Also, they cannot be approved if they have been convicted of sex crimes or crimes involving children. 

I'm guessing Paul can squeak through. Bastard.

Excuse my French.

Edited October 9, 2017 by CoachWristletJen
Added info about K1 Visa & wanted to call Paul a bastard.

[Quof]

Quote

Just like the Americans are expected to adapt to the nonAmerican customs, the nonAmericans need to adapt as well. I seriously doubt the family would be that offended by a foreigner not wanting the food. 

You're a guest in their house, you eat the damned food.   You don't want to do anything non-American, don't leave America or seek out a non-American spouse. 

[Kelly]

Larry isn't Jewish.  He's just stupid.

[Drogo]

Karine decides whether to accept Paul's apology; Patrick pushes Myriam too far; sparks fly between Cortney and Antonio; Sean searches for Abby after a fight; Jesse surprises Darcey; Larry tries to make amends with Jenny after insulting her family.

[Dobian]

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

With a last name like Passariello, and his crossing of himself before he put that tiny bite of pork into his mouth, I think it's unlikely that he's Jewish.

Oh yeah, forgot about that.  Yep, he's Christian.  And a moron.

[shockermolar]

Quote

 Just like the Americans are expected to adapt to the nonAmerican customs, the nonAmericans need to adapt as well. I seriously doubt the family would be that offended by a foreigner not wanting the food. 

Actually no one is saying Larry needs to adapt - what everyone is saying is that he needs to be respectful and cognizant of the customs of the  country to which he CHOSE to travel and perhaps should have made a modicum of effort to learn about before deciding to marry someone from another culture. And the same holds true for all of these idiots really.  

On another note - I saw something and rewound and froze the screen to confirm it. When the producer finally finds Paul and they're standing around in the parking lot discussing the mugging of Karine she tells him that Karine has gone back to the hotel, packed and is moving out to stay with a friend. The camera pans over and you can CLEARLY see Karine sitting the backseat of the maroon SUV tapping away on her phone. 

[Meowwww]

I bet the pig was courtesy of production.  They probably paid for the pig and chuckled with glee at vegetarian Larry’s impending reaction.  

Tv gold ya’ll!!’

[bichonblitz]

5 minutes ago, shockermolar said:

On another note - I saw something and rewound and froze the screen to confirm it. When the producer finally finds Paul and they're standing around in the parking lot discussing the mugging of Karine she tells him that Karine has gone back to the hotel, packed and is moving out to stay with a friend. The camera pans over and you can CLEARLY see Karine sitting the backseat of the maroon SUV tapping away on her phone. 

You have got to be kidding! Those deceitful assholes! They should make a new series "90 Day Fiance Behind the Scenes" 

[Dobian]

11 minutes ago, shockermolar said:

On another note - I saw something and rewound and froze the screen to confirm it. When the producer finally finds Paul and they're standing around in the parking lot discussing the mugging of Karine she tells him that Karine has gone back to the hotel, packed and is moving out to stay with a friend. The camera pans over and you can CLEARLY see Karine sitting the backseat of the maroon SUV tapping away on her phone. 

This show feels totally scripted.  None of these pairings should end in a continued relationship, but I get the feeling that all of them will, at least presented that way on the show.  They all feel like they have a pre-determined outcome.

[Adiba]

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

With a last name like Passariello, and his crossing of himself before he put that tiny bite of pork into his mouth, I think it's unlikely that he's Jewish.

Yeah, I  didn't watch every minute of this episode, but Larry's behavior did not strike me as one of religious reasons not to eat pork. He didn't say as much and seemed just grossed out. Also, aren't Philppinos overwhemingly Roman Catholic? Why wouldn't an observant Jew not communicate this to a potential mate? 

Paul-- creepy and unstable, imo. I feel for Karine if she marries him.

Sean-- stupid is as stupid does. If you say you're not sure if you can trust Abby and are not sure what life will be like with her, then do not propose to her, moron.

Courtney--dumb and annoying. You think Antonio is more "family-oriented?" Whatever gives you that idea?

[poeticlicensed]

If Larry didn't want to eat the pig, then just take a tiny bit and eat the sides, which were probably rice or noodles. The fact that he wouldn't eat any of it most like puts him on par with Paul, who thinks that all food served in foreign countries has cooties. 

[Sprockets]

3 hours ago, CofCinci said:

If Larry is Jewish, he shouldn’t be attacked for abstaining from pork.  I figure production paid for the pig roast to create this drama. 

Whatever Larry's reasons for not wanting to partake, he shouldn't be attcked.  He should just say "This all looks lovely, I am very impressed by your hospitality, but I am not able to eat pork."  Instead he gags it down and says nothing.  It's like he is trying to offend.  

Edited October 9, 2017 by Sprockets
typo

[StayingAfterSunday]

On 10/8/2017 at 8:14 AM, CofCinci said:

This is where Abby shows her age and immaturity. She tries to make Chris jealous in hopes that she gets a commitment from him. That tactic would have worked on him 45 years ago when he was a young man!  He goes to the DR to fuck. Yeah, he took her to a few nice dinners and to a zoo. Maybe even gave her some cash for school. Those niceties are not a relationship — just efforts to assuage his own guilt that he is participating in human trafficking.  He’s doing it for himself, not for her. Again, Abby’s immaturity makes her blind to what is happening with Chris. 

Initially I wasn't convinced that Abby was trying to make Chris jealous; I've since changed my mind, and agree with that observation.   Going back to the scene where she meets Chris at the airport:  Abby, in an enthusiastic voice, refers to Sean (when talking to Chris) as "my baby."  In hindsight, I think her motive is pretty obvious.  Unfortunately for Abby, Chris does not show so much as a tad of jealousy or even curiosity, for that matter, other than casually asking Abby whom she is referring to.  When she tells him, "Sean," the topic ends, just like that.

[StayingAfterSunday]

CoachwristletJen, that is hilarious!  

4 hours ago, CoachWristletJen said:

He certainly would have eaten McNuggets if they had laid those out.

 

Edited October 9, 2017 by Drogo
Quote formatting.

[Quof]

Quote

They will be an intercultural family. Gotta adapt & compromise.

So the first time you meet your prospective spouse's family, you refuse to eat the food they have prepared for you and say "Sorry. You have to adapt and compromise"??  

Got it.

[Granny58]

2 hours ago, AZChristian said:

I googled his bowing, and found that it was probably his version of a Philippine practice of showing respect to elders.  At least he tried with that - although FatherJenny looked a bit askance at him.  

I thought it looked like he was trying to kiss his hand.  

[MrSmith]

2 hours ago, AZChristian said:

With a last name like Passariello, and his crossing of himself before he put that tiny bite of pork into his mouth, I think it's unlikely that he's Jewish.

OK. I'm not sure where I got that he might be Jewish from, then. I haven't been able to find any clips of him saying that he is, either. So, I owe you all a big "mea culpa" for even bringing this up. I hope you'll all forgive my posting incorrect information. :)

1 hour ago, Quof said:

You're a guest in their house, you eat the damned food.   You don't want to do anything non-American, don't leave America or seek out a non-American spouse. 

Especially since he has no reason not to, he should be gracious and eat the food. Personally, when I saw the pig, the first thing I thought was "ohhhhhh, pig cheeks. YUM". That pig looked delicious and I'd have eaten a belly full. I also would have taken them some gifts that are either unavailable in the Philippines or are expensive to get in the Philippines (and that would also be useful for them, of course).

51 minutes ago, shockermolar said:

Actually no one is saying Larry needs to adapt - what everyone is saying is that he needs to be respectful and cognizant of the customs of the  country to which he CHOSE to travel and perhaps should have made a modicum of effort to learn about before deciding to marry someone from another culture. And the same holds true for all of these idiots really.  

On another note - I saw something and rewound and froze the screen to confirm it. When the producer finally finds Paul and they're standing around in the parking lot discussing the mugging of Karine she tells him that Karine has gone back to the hotel, packed and is moving out to stay with a friend. The camera pans over and you can CLEARLY see Karine sitting the backseat of the maroon SUV tapping away on her phone. 

That first paragraph is so spot on. I don't understand why none of these people bother to learn about the culture and customs. That information is right there at your fingertips. They're planning on marrying someone from another country and they're not the least little bit curious about their culture and customs? Really? As for learning even a little bit of the language, I would think they'd be even more motivated wrt this than they are to the culture and customs. Why wouldn't you want to be able to carry simple conversations in that language? Or be able to ask for directions? Or to just be able to say "I want to go to the boat docks" FFS?

We'll be watching this episode tonight. So, I'm going to keep an eagle eye out for this. This is one reason I enjoy reading these forums before watching the show. We would watch it on Sunday nights, except that I have to go to bed for work the next day before it's over. So it gets watched on Mondays (and Lucifer gets watched on Tuesdays :(  ).

[Granny58]

1 hour ago, bichonblitz said:

Just plain ignorance

I don't think his physical responses were ignorant (can't be helped), but his social responses sure were. 

[Lily247]

I didnt like how Jenny's family's poverty was kind of exploited for TV. She was showing Larry the spots on the floor where she sleeps and the fact that there is one bed in the house, plus the curtains as room dividers and storage containers for her clothes. Even Karine's family's poverty wasn't really on display to that extent - her family home and village were on camera just as matter of fact. It was more the remoteness of Karine's location that was obvious. 

It's pretty obvious that Jenny is on this show so she can avoid a fate similar to her mother, to be a domestic helper overseas, I am guessing the Middle East. And if anyone knows how horribly mistreated Phillipino domestic helpers are treated over there, they would do anything to avoid that too. I do think that the whole relationship between Larry and Jenny was manufactured and both are doing this for reality TV paychecks, which Im guessing pays way better than any housekeeper or Mcdonald's job. 

[Christina]

I have an odd food intolerance to the sugar molecule fructose along with suffering from gastoparesis. I cannot eat much at all and very small amounts of high fructose corn syrup, honey or molasses results in projectile vomiting, at minimum. It has, in the past, cause my small intestines to swell landing me in the hospital for a few days on IV Dilaudid. When my mother's aunt invited us over for dinner, I questioned her on the food, including the rolls that I was pretty sure was a frozen dough that typically contained high fructose corn syrup. She was greatly offended and insisted she made it from scratch. She also had negative comments about how little food I had on my plate, and loudly questioned me about not liking her cooking. My mom said that I just couldn't eat that much. Two bites of the roll later, I had an immediate cramping pain in my stomach and I stood up, threw the roll at her and started to walk to the bathroom to vomit. Unfortunately or fortunately as the case may be, I made it two steps before projectile vomiting and fainting. I woke up as the paramedics were loading me into the ambulance. 

I tell that long personal story to say I sympathized with Larry when presented with something he didn't want to eat. He tried and just couldn't do it. Food anxiety is paralyzing. I've been through cognizant behavioral therapy for my food anxiety and still can't go over to people's homes to eat. The thoughts about it leading up to the visits are all consuming, and my CBT training can't overcome the fear. Until I finally decide I just can't go, the crippling anxiety has control of all my thoughts. People get very offended, insist they wouldn't do something to make me sick, but still, my great-aunt insisted it too, and she did.

That's where my sympathy with Larry ends, though. I don't believe any one on this show is in a legitimate relationship and think all of them just want to be on television. This show is so obviously scripted and I don't like any of the participants.

[Granny58]

3 minutes ago, Christina said:

I have an odd food intolerance to the sugar molecule fructose along with suffering from gastoparesis. I cannot eat much at all and very small amounts of high fructose corn syrup, honey or molasses results in projectile vomiting, at minimum. It has, in the past, cause my small intestines to swell landing me in the hospital for a few days on IV Dilaudid. When my mother's aunt invited us over for dinner, I questioned her on the food, including the rolls that I was pretty sure was a frozen dough that typically contained high fructose corn syrup. She was greatly offended and insisted she made it from scratch. She also had negative comments about how little food I had on my plate, and loudly questioned me about not liking her cooking. My mom said that I just couldn't eat that much. Two bites of the roll later, I had an immediate cramping pain in my stomach and I stood up, threw the roll at her and started to walk to the bathroom to vomit. Unfortunately or fortunately as the case may be, I made it two steps before projectile vomiting and fainting. I woke up as the paramedics were loading me into the ambulance. 

that's very interesting, I've never heard of that before.  And given that HFCS is in almost everything, that must be very difficult for you.  Gotta say...I did feel some satisfaction at the thought of you throwing the roll and then vomiting in front of your great aunt (not that you vomited, but that it then became an issue for great aunt to deal with), a sort of revenge.  

[MrSmith]

@Christina Oh. My. God. I think the fact you only made it two steps before vomiting was the perfect karmic result of your great aunt being such a horrible, demonic bitch. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you to find foods you can actually eat. I avoid HFCS because I don't like the bitter aftertaste it leaves and because I don't like its effects on my body, though I don't have the problem you do. I'm sorry you suffer such anxiety over it, too. We've had guests who had dietary proscriptions and had no problem observing them. I can't understand people like your great aunt who do have a problem with it. You're a guest and I have a thing about not wanting my guests to get sick. Maybe I'm funny that way. :D

[booboopbedoo]

He could have taken a small mouthful along with the noodles and rive and proclaimed " That was awesome! Such a wonderful feast you put on for me!"

Then eaten other things and told JennynotJenny he had an allergy to pork.

 The family spent mega bucks which they dont have - to honor him and he came across as rude.

Do these people not Google customs before they come over so they dont appear like ignorant morons??

 

I want to drown Paul

[PamelaMaeSnap]

3 hours ago, AZChristian said:

I googled his bowing, and found that it was probably his version of a Philippine practice of showing respect to elders.  At least he tried with that - although FatherJenny looked a bit askance at him.  

. . . 

I kept wanting the camera to pan out and show more of Sacre Coeur and less of Patrick.  We, too, visited there.  The only thing more beautiful than the outside was the inside.  

Re: the bowing, I am so glad you went further than I did and googled it because I definitely got the feeling that at least he had tried to do some homework and that was his bumbling way of TRYING ...

And re: Sacre Coeur, totally with you there ... with all of the iconic sights and sites of Paris, for some reason sitting at the top of the Sacre Coeur steps and looking down at everything from there is the single most recognizable one for me! We're going back to Paris for a few days (actually bracketing a river cruise in Burgundy with a few days in Paris on either side) and while there are several places I want to go that we didn't get to the first time, that is one place I REALLY want to revisit (Sacre Coeur, Montmartre, etc.)

[Mindthinkr]

11 hours ago, gavinmac said:

Yeah, it's terrible than she hasn't seen her mom. Many Filipinas leave the Philippines to earn money as domestic helpers in Hong Kong, Singapore, the Middle East, etc.  And many of them are not treated well by their rich Chinese or rich Arab bosses. Or they work for an employment service that hold on to their passport while they are abroad, deducts huge amounts from their pay to repay the plane ticket, etc.  Some of the younger ones then also work as freelance prostitutes in sleazy bars in Hong Kong.

If you want to read something heartbreaking on this general topic, read this story from the Atlantic about an American family that had a Filipina slave for 50 years.  https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/06/lolas-story/524490/

As far as Jenny is concerned, she's not going to reject Larry for being too poor.  He likely earns 10X what anyone in her family makes. Even if they can only send couple of hundred bucks a month home from Florida, that makes a huge difference. And she can work in the USA and send 90% of that money back.  Most definitely.  Jenny's not that young or that pretty and is in no position to reject any decent 30-55 year old American suitor. 

Thank you for that clickable link. I found the story both moving and heartbreaking. 

It's sad to think that there are women in this world who's dire circumstances make them feel that it is ok for them to submit to a man so that they can come over to America and try to find the dream. 

[Drogo]

Jokes about cultural stereotypes are casual bigotry-- and aren't welcome here. 

[TeapotWakeen]

1 hour ago, booboopbedoo said:

He could have taken a small mouthful along with the noodles and rive and proclaimed " That was awesome! Such a wonderful feast you put on for me!"

I got all excited when I saw "rive" and thought "Oh! a dish I haven't heard of! Wonder what it is? Wonder if ManilaMart has it? Off to The Google!" Then my brain caught up with my taste buds and I figured out it was a typo for 'rice.' Dammit. When it comes to foods from other cultures, if it didn't swim/live* in the ocean, I'll try it!**

(*allergies)
(**I'm not trying balut. Not happening.)

[Sprockets]

1 hour ago, Christina said:

People get very offended, insist they wouldn't do something to make me sick, but still, my great-aunt insisted it too, and she did.

That's where my sympathy with Larry ends, though. I don't believe any one on this show is in a legitimate relationship and think all of them just want to be on television. This show is so obviously scripted and I don't like any of the participants.

Like you, I have very severe food restrictions, to the point that I can no longer eat in restaurants, and I share the anxiety that accompanies it.  If Larry has something similar, he should have communicated it to his hosts in some tactful way, but he didn't.  

[puppytoes]

12 hours ago, gavinmac said:

Yeah, it's terrible than she hasn't seen her mom. Many Filipinas leave the Philippines to earn money as domestic helpers in Hong Kong, Singapore, the Middle East, etc.  And many of them are not treated well by their rich Chinese or rich Arab bosses. Or they work for an employment service that hold on to their passport while they are abroad, deducts huge amounts from their pay to repay the plane ticket, etc.  Some of the younger ones then also work as freelance prostitutes in sleazy bars in Hong Kong.

If you want to read something heartbreaking on this general topic, read this story from the Atlantic about an American family that had a Filipina slave for 50 years.  https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/06/lolas-story/524490/

As far as Jenny is concerned, she's not going to reject Larry for being too poor.  He likely earns 10X what anyone in her family makes. Even if they can only send couple of hundred bucks a month home from Florida, that makes a huge difference. And she can work in the USA and send 90% of that money back.  Most definitely.  Jenny's not that young or that pretty and is in no position to reject any decent 30-55 year old American suitor. 

That had to be the saddest article I have ever read.  I totally understand why these young women from Thailand and the Philippines want to escape poverty.  Thanks for sharing the article