The Lonely Js Club: James, Jackson & Johannah

[Happyfatchick]

Do you, JB? I always see her as exceptionally shy. She doesn't really want to talk at all. And it would suuuuuck the big one to be the shy kid in that crowd.

[becca3891]

I'd lean more towards shy too, but if she is feeling grumpy, SHOWING it is absolutely forbidden in the world of Gothard character qualities. No way is she actually scowling in a corner. But she may well make an effort to stay off camera when she can, and I can't blame her for that, especially if the theory is true that only the married adults get paid separately for filming. In their world, there is not a need for a young woman to save her own money so what's in it for Jana to hog the camera if she doesn't want to?

 

Interesting point about Jana being the only one without an official hobby or occupation. Isn't that really true for Jessa too, though? She never got into photography or midwifery, unless I'm forgetting something. I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that she is now married and pregnant and has never set foot in a workplace in her life. I think working in retail is something every teenager should have to do.

[GEML]

I think Jessa really took a lot of pleasure in being the go to person for hair, make-up, clothing and decorating. Given that they were on TV, and doing things such as having whole episodes dedicated to decorating Anna and Jill's homes, that's a pretty genuine hobby to have. Remember when they were remodeling Jessa's house there were comments made about NOT decorating it, as Jessa would want to do it herself.

[JenCarroll]

Taking reply to "Things that get on your nerves" thread...

[Jellybeans]

She may be shy, but she does talk on the show and does a great job of it. But one can be shy and grumpy too. They don't both show up at the same time necessarily. By grumpy, I mean...has no interest in doing anything and refuses to be filmed even tho she's there.

Hey I am just speculating. :p

[CarolMK]

Rather than just shy, it seems like Jana is also quite introverted, as is her twin John David. Both of my sons and my husband are introverts, I'm the only extrovert in our family...but anyway, from living with introverts, I see that they need their private time and space and being with other people for extended periods of time exhausts them. It must be hell for Jana and John David living in such a large family and being introverted. Then the camera crew comes around and makes you part of the story of the week, like it or not. If I were Jana, I'd find more than one reason to have serious migraines and the need to lie down in a dark room when the cameras are there. 

[bybrandy]

Not all but plenty of shy people are perfectly comfortable around people they know well, henceforth, it could be hell for Jana only when the cameras are on.   I would hope, anyway.  

[Vaysh]

I think she's both shy and introverted! ;) She seems incredibly uncomfortable on camera and doesn't seem to speak much unless spoken to, which I tend to attribute to shyness. If you're self-conscious and feel awkward, you probably don't want this displayed on television.

 

Like CarolMK said, both Jana and John David come across as introverts and the idea of being an introvert and not be allowed any privacy or alone time ever sounds like hell on earth (I'm one myself and while I love spending time with my family as well as relatives and friends, it can be both mentally and physically draining). Now, imagine living in a house where alone time is not only hard to come by but actively discouraged as something bad and wrong that could send you to hell. Yikes. I'd be grumpy as fuck. Constantly.

 

It's interesting that one of her sisters (can't recall who it was, but I think it was in one of the Jill episodes last year) described Jana as reserved, even at home. It had me thinking that perhaps she's trying to create a private space within herself where she can think and get away from the hustle and bustle of her environment, and that this comes across as reserved to the rest of her, mostly extroverted, family. I know I can "shut off" a bit when overwhelmed or tired from too much socialising and apparently that makes some people read me as aloof or reserved, when I'm really just exhausted and want to go home and read a book. As an introvert you also tend to spend a lot of time inside your own head rather than communicating with the outside world and that too can come across as reserved.

 

I actually like the idea of Grumpy Jana. Like, "fine I'll be on your stupid show and I'll alter your stupid bridesmaid dresses and I'll sing the stupid Blood song to screeching violins but I will not like it and you can't make me". I doubt it is true but it would be pretty awesome if behind the cameras she's doing her job but is refusing to keep sweet about it.

Edited May 19, 2015 by Vaysh

[RazzleberryPie]

What's the age difference in Ben when he first started courting Jessa, and Marjorie right now?

[allonsyalice]

a year, I think. I vividly remember Ben saying he was 18 when he was first introduced, and Marjorie is 17.

[Sew Sumi]

Ben just turned 20 yesterday, so he was 18 and about 4 months when he began courting Jessa. He was still 17 when they began the :get to know you" phase. I saw that Marjorie just turned 17 in Feb. or March, so she is a full year younger than Ben.

 

GEML, I'm usually with you, but how many people can anecdotally say that they royally fucked up the relationship they were in at 18, and are glad they never married that person (or anyone) at that age. Goes both ways, and I'm one who is eternally grateful that I didn't marry the guy I was going with when I graduated from high school.

[Abstract]

Oh my gosh, Marjorie and Joyanna are the same age. Somehow that puts it in perspective for me. That is just so very young! Especially for someone who seems so theatrical and full of life. She should be auditioning for theater programs at colleges but it's all over once she gets married and becomes pregnant, in their world. It reminds me of Michael Farris's 17 year old daughter (I'm sure some of you know who he is) who gave up a college basketball scholarship to get married. We used to attend their church and I remember seeing her a few years later at the grocery store, with several little ones, looking so much older she was almost unrecognizable. I always wanted to ask her if she regretted her choice, but I do know that she became very overwhelmed after having three babies in three years and they rethought their Quiverfull views.

Taking this to the Prayer Closet to ask about the Farrises.

[GEML]

But Marjorie is a long term family friend, whereas Ben was stalking the Duggars because he knew them from Quiverful circles/TV, so I'm not sure that's significant.

[becca3891]

I suspect Derick's asking Jim Bob to be his prayer partner was a craftier form of stalking. Boob may have known what he was up to all along, who knows, but it is interesting that neither he nor Ben were longtime family friends, considering they are acquainted with a huge number of "like-minded" families from the ATI conferences in Big Sandy. I'm sorry if this has been asked already, but do Marjorie's family attend the storage building "church?"

[GEML]

I've wondered that too. On the one hand, their close and consistent proximity to the family would seem to indicate it's likely. We know the Duggars keep their children pretty sheltered. And this family has not only known them a long time, but also been allowed to help in their education, which would be a big concession.

But if they do go to JB's church, that's a pretty good indication that while its invitation only exclusive, he doesn't dictate behavior to those outside his family. Their dress choices, allowing their children extracurriculars, a picture with a bottle of wine on the wall, of all things - Gothard these folks aren't. Marjorie's writings seem more very conservative Southern Baptist than even Fundy in a lot of ways. After all, the girl has pretended to be a nun...;)

[Happyfatchick]

I read somewhere (?) that the warehouse church had been shut down. Anybody know more about that?

[Fuzzysox]

I read somewhere (?) that the warehouse church had been shut down. Anybody know more about that?

Pickles talked about it. I don't know why Boob shut it down?

 

Anyone else besides me think that JoyAnna is always the talking head when talking about a new couple i.e. Si and Marjorie are perfect for each other. She seems to say that over and over again about all the couples in her deer in the headlights face. You can tell the poor girl is being forced to lie through her teeth every single time. 

Edited May 20, 2015 by Fuzzysox

[BitterApple]

Pickles talked about it. I don't know why Boob shut it down?

Anyone else besides my think that JoyAnna is always the talking head when talking about a new couple i.e. Si and Marjorie are perfect for each other. She seems to say that over and over again about all the couples in her deer in the headlights face. You can tell the poor girl is being forced to lie through her teeth every single time.

Right, like she has the option to say "this is a total fucking disaster and I can't imagine two people who are worse suited to one another." It's such a stupid and inane question because nobody is going to say how they really feel when they're in front of the couple, their family and the tv cameras.

[Literata]

My God, I wish these two would let a few years pass before they get married, but that's not going to happen. So, that said, I like Marjorie. Yes, she's a theater kid, but she's also articulate and seems intelligent. I don't see any real chemistry between the two of them, but we can probably attribute that to their ages, and to nerves. I hope they're at least infatuated with one another.

 

In the previews for next season, the scene with Boob and Josiah seemed pretty strained and awkward. The only son with whom Boob seems to be comfortable is John-David; maybe he's masculine-appearing enough not to threaten Boob's comfort level. And I didn't get an effeminate vibe at all from Josiah last night; boyfriend can dress, but more power to him for having -- unlike most in that household -- some sartorial skills.

[CofCinci]

Oh, Jana. Poor Jana. Now we all know why she has given up her young adulthood in order to care for her younger siblings. She knows that her parents are worthless and ignore abuse.

[mywinston]

Well, this all seems horrible.

 

Good to know Jana does not fuck around. She saw what went down and knew someone had to volunteer as tribute, no way could she leave those kids alone. Also explains why Jessa and Jill peaced out so quickly.

[JoanArc]

In the Josh thread I mentioned - Jana (and the other girls) will be left with nothing. Abuse victim (bad in their world), no solid education/skills, forced to be a sistermom since age 7, NO MONEY*, etc. What's she going to be left with. I guess she's finally somewhat free, but at what cost?

 

*All the girls deserve to take their cut NOW, while there's something left in JB's accounts.

[3 is enough]

Gotta wonder if Marjorie's parents are having second thoughts  about the courtship given the breaking news about Josh.

[CarolMK]

Jana should get a book deal, like NOW! 

[Wellfleet]

In the Josh thread I mentioned - Jana (and the other girls) will be left with nothing. Abuse victim (bad in their world), no solid education/skills, forced to be a sistermom since age 7, NO MONEY*, etc. What's she going to be left with. I guess she's finally somewhat free, but at what cost?

 

*All the girls deserve to take their cut NOW, while there's something left in JB's accounts.

 

Hopefully the girls will have access to professional therapists, counselors, social workers etc who can treat, advise and [really] educate them on what the future can hold. I picture a lot of sympathetic people coming forward to help. Or do I just watch too much TV?

Edited May 21, 2015 by Wellfleet

[JoanArc]

Hopefully the girls will have access to professional therapists, counselors, social workers etc who can treat, advise and [really] educate them on what the future can hold. I picture a lot of sympathetic people coming forward to help. Or do I just watch too much TV?

This is my wish too. But can you see Janna saying - "I'm taking the SUV for my therapy appointment!" Well, MAYBE now she can. The family dynamic is about to get shaken up, big time.

[Wellfleet]

This is my wish too. But can you see Janna saying - "I'm taking the SUV for my therapy appointment!" Well, MAYBE now she can. The family dynamic is about to get shaken up, big time.

 

Yes, I agree. I think she won't have to say anything at all from now on. She'll grab her jacket, her bag and her keys - and leave. Oh, and her buddy group reverts back to where they should have been all along - with their mother. Won't that be just so special and sweet and precious, Me-chelle?

[GEML]

Could go either way. They might break it off, or they might choose to "rescue" him.

[JenCarroll]

Oh please, let them rescue him.

[CarolMK]

Maybe the best thing for Josiah is moving into Marjorie's home and marrying her as soon as she turns 18, but continuing to live there. I always suspected Jim Bob of mistreating Josiah during the whole Jubilee announcement, but after reading the police report about Josh today and seeing that the kids confessed that they were beaten with rods, I think all of the kids should get out of that house.

[dillpickles]

Maybe the best thing for Josiah is moving into Marjorie's home and marrying her as soon as she turns 18, but continuing to live there. I always suspected Jim Bob of mistreating Josiah during the whole Jubilee announcement, but after reading the police report about Josh today and seeing that the kids confessed that they were beaten with rods, I think all of the kids should get out of that house.

Holy shit they got beat with rods? And social services didn't do anything? On TOP of these molestation accusations?

[BitterApple]

It will be interesting to see if Marjorie continues with the courtship. If she's a famewhore looking for her 15 minutes, I'd say no, especially since the show will likely be cancelled. If she's in it for the right reasons she'll probably stick around but lean away from the Duggars and steer Josiah towards her own family.

[awaken]

Maybe the best thing for Josiah is moving into Marjorie's home and marrying her as soon as she turns 18, but continuing to live there. I always suspected Jim Bob of mistreating Josiah during the whole Jubilee announcement, but after reading the police report about Josh today and seeing that the kids confessed that they were beaten with rods, I think all of the kids should get out of that house.

 

 

Wait, what?  The Duggar kids, or the kids who were abused were beaten?

 

I came here to see if Josiah going to ALERT was any indication that they thought he  was up to no good with girls, so sent him there for brainwashing.  

[EarlGreyTea]

Hopefully the girls will have access to professional therapists, counselors, social workers etc who can treat, advise and [really] educate them on what the future can hold. I picture a lot of sympathetic people coming forward to help. Or do I just watch too much TV?

When the Honey Boo Boo scandal broke, TLC canceled the show faster than you can say "scandal," and one of the things they did immediately afterward was offer the daughter who was molested some counseling and other resources. I don't see why they wouldn't do the same here for the girls. TLC-recommended therapists sound a whole lot better than whoever JB and Michelle would scrounge up.

 

And while I'm in the Jana thread, can I just  say now that I bet a whole lot of us are now thinking "That explains a whole lot." Lots of little things about Jana we've noticed, and things she's said, and general Duggar moments make a whole lot more sense in light of what we know.

[Apple Clark]

@Wellfleet The buddy groups would never revert back to "Mom". They'd probably end up in Joy Anna's care, and she'd become the next Jana pretty quick. Either her or Grandma, but never Mechelle.

Edited May 22, 2015 by Apple Clark

[dillpickles]

It really does explain why she's not too ready to leave the Duggar home. She's the oldest girl, she feels like she has to protect the younger ones. And, maybe that person she "was working on forgiving" or whatever wasn't Jessa.

[bluebonnet]

When the Honey Boo Boo scandal broke, TLC canceled the show faster than you can say "scandal," and one of the things they did immediately afterward was offer the daughter who was molested some counseling and other resources. I don't see why they wouldn't do the same here for the girls. TLC-recommended therapists sound a whole lot better than whoever JB and Michelle would scrounge up.

 

And while I'm in the Jana thread, can I just  say now that I bet a whole lot of us are now thinking "That explains a whole lot." Lots of little things about Jana we've noticed, and things she's said, and general Duggar moments make a whole lot more sense in light of what we know.

I wonder how much more difficult it will be for TLC since they know the Duggars would refuse treatment.  More, the public knows the Duggars would refuse.  There wasn't that same issue with Honey Boo Boo.  There was always a very good chance that Mama June would encourage Alana to the TLC therapy, if not for Alana's sake, then for publicity's sake.  I don't really care what happens to TLC because they are a shyte network these days, but if they want to protect themselves, they are really going to have to think long and hard about what sort of plausible support they can offer the children that just might be acceptable to the parents.  

[Wellfleet]

@Wellfleet The buddy groups would never revert back to "Mom". They'd probably end up in Joy Anna's care, and she'd become the next Jana pretty quick. Either her or Grandma, but never Mechelle.

 

Sadly, I think you're probably right. Even more sadly, maybe that's for best...

Edited May 22, 2015 by Wellfleet

[Wellfleet]

And while I'm in the Jana thread, can I just  say now that I bet a whole lot of us are now thinking "That explains a whole lot." Lots of little things about Jana we've noticed, and things she's said, and general Duggar moments make a whole lot more sense in light of what we know.

 

Absolutely. "Oh, that makes sense now..." has been rattling around in my head all afternoon. So much of what we've been baffled by for so long is adding up. Like when you are doing a connect-the-dots and first see clearly what the final figure will be. You can't believe you didn't see it sooner!

[flyingdi]

Hopefully the girls will have access to professional therapists, counselors, social workers etc who can treat, advise and [really] educate them on what the future can hold. I picture a lot of sympathetic people coming forward to help. Or do I just watch too much TV?

I am non eagerly awaiting the news that Dr. Phil is rushing in to offer help to Jana, Josh or really any of the family. I'd be surprised he wasn't making calls already.

[kandinski]

I dont think its girls somehow...

[CofCinci]

I am non eagerly awaiting the news that Dr. Phil is rushing in to offer help to Jana, Josh or really any of the family. I'd be surprised he wasn't making calls already.

Even with Dr. Phil's expired clinical license, he's more the mental health clinician then they'll ever see at any of their church punishment camps.

[JoanArc]

I don't want to see Josiah rescued by marriage. If he could stay a Marjorie's, in his own room, without a lifetime commitment, that's cool. He's got A LOT to process, and develop. If he still wants to marry her in two years, great, if not, great.

[kalamac]

As an abuse survivor myself, I've wondered about Jana for awhile (I think I maybe mentioned it here), but I had been thinking maybe JB had been taking advantage during Michelle's unavailable times. I was hoping I was wrong entirely. Poor Jana, and the other girls too. I know how hard it is to live with your abuser in silence.

[awaken]

I'd lean more towards shy too, but if she is feeling grumpy, SHOWING it is absolutely forbidden in the world of Gothard character qualities. No way is she actually scowling in a corner. But she may well make an effort to stay off camera when she can, and I can't blame her for that, especially if the theory is true that only the married adults get paid separately for filming. In their world, there is not a need for a young woman to save her own money so what's in it for Jana to hog the camera if she doesn't want to?

Interesting point about Jana being the only one without an official hobby or occupation. Isn't that really true for Jessa too, though? She never got into photography or midwifery, unless I'm forgetting something. I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that she is now married and pregnant and has never set foot in a workplace in her life. I think working in retail is something every teenager should have to do.

Doesn't she sew amazingly and play the piano as her "official hobbies"?

Hopefully the girls will have access to professional therapists, counselors, social workers etc who can treat, advise and [really] educate them on what the future can hold. I picture a lot of sympathetic people coming forward to help. Or do I just watch too much TV?

I can see tlc offering it but not them taking it. If they haven't had counseling by now why would the family suddenly recognize the need. I hope they have had the chance to be counseled by someone other than mom and dad but I doubt it.

[JoanArc]

Knowing what Jana's been through and seen can we change the title of this thread? It seems kinda insulting, now.

[JoanArc]

I just realized Jana's famous JTTH spiel about having issues in her heart against certain family members probably didn't just mean her parents... :(

[Aw my lahgs]

As an abuse survivor myself, I've wondered about Jana for awhile (I think I maybe mentioned it here), but I had been thinking maybe JB had been taking advantage during Michelle's unavailable times. I was hoping I was wrong entirely. Poor Jana, and the other girls too. I know how hard it is to live with your abuser in silence.

 

The sad thing is, I have a feeling that Josh didn't come up with this himself. He must have learned it from somewhere. His father is a sex addict and freak. I hope he didn't learn it from his father or was abused himself.

[bluebonnet]

Knowing what Jana's been through and seen can we change the title of this thread? It seems kinda insulting, now.

Yes, please!  It was always really offensive because it seemed to reinforce sexist expectations for women in fundamentalist families.  Now it's just completely tactless.  

The sad thing is, I have a feeling that Josh didn't come up with this himself. He must have learned it from somewhere. His father is a sex addict and freak. I hope he didn't learn it from his father or was abused himself.

Err, I think the Duggar parents are horrible people, but there is no sense in blindly speculating things, like sex addiction.  The big problem that need not be speculated is that their fundamentalist philosophy is harmful to children.  

Edited May 22, 2015 by bluebonnet

[JenCarroll]

As an abuse survivor myself, I've wondered about Jana for awhile (I think I maybe mentioned it here), but I had been thinking maybe JB had been taking advantage during Michelle's unavailable times. I was hoping I was wrong entirely. Poor Jana, and the other girls too. I know how hard it is to live with your abuser in silence.

Hmm, well, I was going to make a possibly inappropriate response, but I'll just say this -- all day I've been wondering what else we don't know about.