mywinston

I remember in earlier seasons of TM2 when it was becoming very evident that Adam would foerver be ~98% full of shit at all times, Chelsea would talk to Randy about how saw it made her. I especially think having Randy always there for her as a child, and then having that to compare to the puke puddle Adam is was quite the reality check for her early on. But she did a semi admirable job of pulling herself together, taking good advice, and finding a passable guy. Adam, however, remains puke puddle-y.

Dude, it's Spring Break. It's like the Ke$ha of holidays. She can't miss that, restless leg syndrome or no. Speaking of, what a crazy bitch. Her storyline each week has zero to negative cohesion. Her stupidity and delusion would be much more entertaining if her kids and Mother didn't suffer from her idiotic hijinks.

Adam is such a douche. Aubree was cheering him on so adorably and was so proud of him and he barely acknowledges her. Why is he spending the time he has with both his daughters at a dirty ass gym? That Dollar Store trophy he got for "first place" must be more important to him than QT.

"Because he's gonna grow up to be a man. He's not gonna grow up to be a...wo-man."- David's revelation. "I am healthy! I go to the gym two to three times a WEEK. I work out VIGOROUSLY. I drink PROTEIN SHAKES!" - Jenelle, the portrait of health. "The doctors didn't do a goddamn thing for me... I have restless leg syndrome! I can't even walk right now! Something is wrong with me, I think I have MS, I swear to fucking God!" "Oh, you don't have MS." "Okay, sure. Bye, Mom." - Jenelle and Barb's exchange, Jenelle hangs up like Barb is the one sounding like an idiot. "Maybe ya have diabeetus, Junelle!" - Barb, cackling. "It would be nice if I can just share my stories with you." - Javi. "SO TELL ME THEM. I CAN'T READ YOUR MIND." - Kail, being so warm and inviting. And I'll just leave this here. This all sounds pretty legit, guys, everyone knows Spidey senses and "hard to read good" are symptoms of restless leg syndrome.

I had to laugh at how Jenelle went from last weeks rant of "I go to the gym TWO to THREE times a week. I work out VIGOROUSLY. I drink PROTEIN SHAKES!" to tearfully exclaiming she has restless leg syndrome and self diagnosed MS. I was loling at her as hard as Barb was. Damn, Kail is stone cold. She reminds me of how I was to disposable boyfriends years ago. But I was a teenager, she's a grown up and just an asshole. She shut Javi down hard when all he wanted was like, a scrap of affection, but he's so whiny I almost clapped. "I work 24 hours shifts. I am a robot." Chelsea's segments were boring, Leah's were sad and irritating. That chick is delusional, and so is her entire family.

I lost my shit at 'the short guy that lives here' 100%. Please script Jenelle more often But yeah, that she's most likely popping out another baby to totally neglect is just horrific. That David guy creeps me out to the nth degree. Not surprised none of us are surprised. This chick is as predictable and awful as we all say.

"You're trying to pin Kaiser on me!" How does someone "pin" your own baby on you? These two assholes drove erratically all over God's green earth just to avoid taking care of their baby for one night. That scene spoke volumes about how little they give a shit about that kid. He wasn't a magical charm that kept them together so I guess he isn't as important as the gym or sitting in a car crying into your phone. Really sad. Regarding Chelsea talking about Adam in front of Aubree, obviously she shouldn't do it, but obviously MTV is setting up these segments in advance. "Okay, go here and talk about Aubree's graduation and then Adam and then Cole. We need soundbites." And Aubree probably wants to go with her Mom, and she seems pretty close with Chelsea's two friends. She can't just get a babysitter every time. BUT what I do think is funny is when she tries to spell Adam's name. For one, not like Aubree won't be able to guess who A-d-a-m is based on context and the fact that Chelsea's been doing this for years And two, Adam is like, the most phonetically spelled names of all time. It's like trying to hide that you're talking about someone named Dee by spelling D-e-e. All the letters are just the sounds the letters make. Adam and A-d-a-m are nearly identical, it's the most useless thing ever. I actually laugh.

They did really well, it seemed like they were catching a meal every day. And it rained for a while before their fire went out, they built a little canopy over it. I have to say, I was impressed. When she mentioned they had "snuggled up for warmth" and he ended up making her a little bikini top was immediately followed with them waking up to go check their trap and he wrapped an arm around her. My Mom had a funny theory, she thinks they were more intimate than they let on. "They were fuckin'," were her exact words, haha, and while i really doubt it, they do seem closer than most. Both attractive, they got along exceptionally well, he didn't berate her for losing the fish, he ecouraged her to take a part the caiman, they we all cuddled up moreso than we've seen any other pair at night. By the end he was even slapping flies off her. Plus she really seemed to thrive under his leadership. They made a little house. If you watched that behind the scenes thing, she was the girl who put most emphasis on how she bathed every day to keep clean, had a little makeshift hairbrush and charcoal teeth brushing process. They seemed like they had the most fun, too, they put together those cute little informercials in their downtime. Could be because they had so much energy, but, funny to think about. My Mom was certainly convinced.

Marathoning old TM2 seasons, the earlier ones. It's such a marked contrast between the Leah then and the Leah now. She was never the brightest girl, but she seemed so much more full of life and came across as perfectly capable with her children. Despite her occassional lapses into immaturity she was perfectly likable and sometimes almost charming in her love for her daughters. Now I can't remember the last time I was endeared to Leah; she's fallen very far, I think it's pretty sad. I hope she gets her shit together.

These exercises just get more fuckin' dumb each time. Jim, is that his name? Was acting so inappropriate half the time. Mike should've headbutted him and so should've Hank. Kendra is insane, Travis just seems tiring and needy, Jeff seems more boring than anything, Jordan has air between her ears and I cringe every time I hear Hank with his whiny, crying voice. Mike and Lauren are coming across surprising well, and I have no real qualms with Reggie and Tami. Aubrey I've liked throughout, for whatever reason. "He wrote his letter to asthma." "...yeah, we're gonna change that." I had a good laugh at everyone mocking Hank's enormous obstacle to overcome. Did I mishear or later when they met up Kendra was like, 'did you tell them about the asthma?' and he's all 'yeah' like they got shit done.

Mid season two right now, there's the episode where Kieffer and Jenelle steal Barb's credit cards and go to his brother's house in New Jersey. One scene that stood out to me was when they go out to dinner with the brother and his girlfriend who seems like a fairly nice woman. Barb ends up calling Jenelle and she's like "ugh! Why is she calling?" to which Kieffer's brother replies, "The same reason any parent calls - to be irritating." And you can sort of tell it emboldens Jenelle, who just sits there while Barb yells at her, making all these obvious points about what bullshit their prank is, and that Jenelle doesn't have a place to live. It's so cringeworthy after that, it's like Jenelle wants to impress her new friends and act all badass so she starts in with, "Well I don't care but I will be back for my stuff! I don't care that you'll call the cops on me, it's my property!" Really escalating the fight in FRONT of these strangers in the MIDDLE of dinner. She thinks she's showing off how no nonsense she is but the girlfriend looks really uncomfortable and Kieffer is very obviously embarrased so shuts it down with a, "Tell her you can't talk right now, man." and without stopping, mid-rant Jenelle goes, "and I can't talk about this right now because I am at dinner!" But the scene goes on for a while and the girlfriend makes the face that any normal person would in the situation. Man, Jenelle really cannot read a room. Ah, secondhand embarassment for KIEFFER? Haha. Never thought it'd happen.

Zoey: What's escrow? Akilitus: The air between the trapezes.

Zoey: Oh, fuck e-vites! The French Revolution didn't have e-vites! Oh, no, it's high noon, mothafuckas!

Jeremy is such a wooden block of a character. He basically smashes his face into Rachel's in the barn, gets her all worked up, then dramatically jumps off her to, surprise, once again belittle her. How quickly he forgets about his fiancee. Douchebag. And so bland. Don't like him or them together at all. On the flip side of that, Faith planting one on Amy unannounced was adorable and I loved that entire storyline.

Piper: I like your sweater. It's soft. Like your resolve when you're offered a plea deal. Alex: I thought you were going to tell the truth! Piper: And I thought you were going to lie! Alex: Jesus, we're like a fucking O. Henry story. Crazy Eyes: You know, if you were still my wife, I'd tell you all the time how much I like your titties! 'cause girls like that. And that is a tip. From me, to you. Alex's face after she says that is like 'yeah, fair enough' agreeance. Slays me. Alex: 9 1/2, right? Piper: Ten. Alex: Did your feet swell when you went back to boys? Piper: Fuck you. Piper: I don't get it. I guess I'm the only one who cares if there's a funeral. Alex: Okay, that's not the MOST self involved thing I've heard you say, but it's definitely up there.