S05.E14: Into the Closet

[OnceSane]

Quote

A tearful Stassi gets some hard relationship advice from her little brother. Meanwhile, Sandoval attempts to reignite his career by diving back into modeling and acting in Peter's sci-fi movie. Later, Pandora throws Katie a relaxing spa day but things grow tense when Ariana refuses to apologize to Stassi and Katie's attacks brings Scheana to tears. Finally, Sandoval, Jax and Ariana raid Lisa's fabulous closet to fulfill Schwartz's dream of dressing in drag for his bachelor party. 

[ivygirl]

Joe Simpson? JOE SIMPSON? Of all the cheesy and questionable decisions made by this crew, choosing Joe Simpson as a photog is vying for a top spot. Wonder if he commented on Sandoval's double D's.

[Sarcastica]

LMAO, Joe Simpson sighting. 

Katie's an asshole. 

Bye. 

[Primetimer]

It's a slow week for the SURvers until Scheana takes the initiative and initiates a stomp-off.

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[chick binewski]

Yes, T. Sandy. All the scams run by Joe Simpson top agencies are interested in 30 y/o plus guys with frosted ponytails.

I cannot watch Katie and Tom continue to deny how much they dislike and resent each other.

I also cannot imagine a more irritating threesome than Tom, Schaena and Ariana. One complaining that you're messing up their hair, one whining about her teeth hurting and one insisting you're interpreting the Kama Sutra incorrectly. 

[Schlinkaboo]

Why is Nikolai so involved in Stassi's relationship? Is he really Stassi's "brother"?

[zoeysmom]

http://www.vulture.com/2017/02/vanderpump-rules-season-5-episode-14.html

How many more parties for Katie before the wedding?

[AngryCarrot86]

The comments from the peanut gallery in Lisa's closet were gold.  Jax saying "I won't take them" when he saw those sunglasses had me LOLing.  Also his "No it's mine, I only wear Givenchy".  Ha!  

I can do without Stassi's mom, but her little brother is adorable.  He's like a 45 year old man disguised as an 11 year old.  Years wiser than any of our cast members, even Ariana! 

Joe Simpson? Wtf.  Had to laugh at FI's modeling AND (poor) acting all in the same episode.  He seems a little desperate now that he's getting older.  

Katie is the worst but Tom was being awful during their dinner.  I almost didn't blame her for walking off this time.  Almost.  They won't even last as long as the Shays.  The reality t.v wedding curse!  

[VagueDisclaimer]

While I'm sure Katie (and all of them) has some issues with alcohol, the theme this season is to accuse her of drinking every single time there's an argument. It's to the point that it feels like gaslighting, esp from Tom and Scheana. 

 

ETA: And I just saw the recap mentioned Tom gaslighting Katie too! Glad I wasn't alone.

Edited February 7, 2017 by VagueDisclaimer
Edit

[Sun-Bun]

Poor Sandoval. He really is pretty delusional about his chances of "making a name" for himself still. And his thirst is indeed real. When you think aligning yourself with creepy Papa Joe Simpson is a bigtime professional opportunity, you've pretty much resigned yourself to eternal Z Listdom. And/or eternal ridicule, which that awkward cameo in Peter's movie definitely deserves.

Bless Jax's heart, I felt all his bored and uncomfortable pain at that church service: I'm a recovering childhood Catholic too. Nothing much worse than getting organized religion crammed down your throat when you've long since given up on church services. I just don't see much genuine love or sparks coming from him and Brittany, just resigned formality and boredom.

Pandora's home is pretty damned adorable and her luncheon was such a lovely and elegant contrast to the stupid Coachella-themed Taco Bell party that Stassi and Kristen slapped together. And real estate porn/rich lifestyle aside, I dunno if someone as vain as Stassi could handle having the Vanderpumps as parents...let's just say Pandy didn't exactly inherit much of her mom's natural visual appeal.

Speaking of Stassi, I don't find her kid brother remotely cute, just an annoying know-it-all who acts like one of those bratty commercial kid actors. Her whole family is just way too damned extra onscreen for me.

[zoeysmom]

57 minutes ago, VagueDisclaimer said:

While I'm sure Katie (and all of them) has some issues with alcohol, the theme this season is to accuse her of drinking every single time there's an argument. It's to the point that it feels like gaslighting, esp from Tom and Scheana. 

 

ETA: And I just saw the recap mentioned Tom gaslighting Katie too! Glad I wasn't alone.

If it is her natural personality that just leaves Katie being a miserable bitch.  I guess she is giving alcohol a bad name.

[WhosThatGirl]

I do feel like this season, a majority of our main players have a lot more going on that's being shown on camera and therefore they all look like crazy people.

Tom Schwartz is being a jerk to Katie here. He is gaslighting her and undermining her feelings about her wedding day. Which in all honestly is probably a bigger deal to her being the bride and all than it is him. And I always found it kind of rude that he did ask Ariana to be a groomsmen. That felt messed up to him. There was a reason she wasn't asked, tom but whatever.

I also love that Ariana like Stassi says picks and chooses which wedding events she wants to participate in, even if they are somewhat restricted to bridesmaid events and groomsmen events.

[ivygirl]

45 minutes ago, Sun-Bun said:

Poor Sandoval. He really is pretty delusional about his chances of "making a name" for himself still. And his thirst is indeed real. When you think aligning yourself with creepy Papa Joe Simpson is a bigtime professional opportunity, you've pretty much resigned yourself to eternal Z Listdom. And/or eternal ridicule, which that awkward cameo in Peter's movie definitely deserves.

I feel like he might get a couple good (meaning somewhat stable and paying) gigs a year or two after this show is cancelled. I mean, if Taylor Hicks can get a travel show, Sandoval could get SOMETHING. He has a decent sense of humor, as evidenced by his talking heads.

Speaking of senses of humor, that commercial for 50 Shades with Ariana was SO bad. Bad meaning bad, not bad meaning good.

I did, however, love the product placement shot of LVP Sangria.  I was SO disappointed to learn that Cost Plus World Market only sells it seasonally.

Edited February 7, 2017 by ivygirl

[Misslindsey]

30 minutes ago, zoeysmom said:

If it is her natural personality that just leaves Katie being a miserable bitch.  I guess she is giving alcohol a bad name.

Hahaha! I love this! For me Katie gets more horrible each episode. Stassi and Ariana seemed to settle their issue as best as it is going to be for them, so I do not get why Katie needed to go on and on about it at the lunch, then at dinner with Tom. Just let it go Katie. Stassi seemed fine with the outcome. I thought Katie was making the whole thing a bigger deal than what it actually was. While I do think Tom can be passive aggressive, in this case with the Ariana situation, I think he is caught in the middle between his best friend and Katie. I also think that Tom seems like he is more willing to have an actual conversation about their issues, where as Katie gets mean if he disagrees with her. I get that she wants him to have her back, but often times I find Katie unreasonable, so I just do not care anymore. Why are these two getting married anyway?

I admit since I find the coven unbearable that I find myself being more okay with Ariana (and Scheana) than I used to. I am glad she did not apologize to Stassi. I guess I do not get the big deal about Ariana attending various events. As for Scheana, I so wanted her just to walk out on that lunch. The coven is always going to make Scheana their scapegoat and nothing she does is ever going to be good enough. Well, unless Katie, Stassi, and Kristen get mad at each other or something.

Sigh. I probably am a horrible person, but I am so sick of Stassi crying over Patrick. Also, while I think her little brother is the sane one in the family, stop trying to make him happen.

Sandoval's photo shoot with creepy Joe Simpson seemed strange. I was thinking what the fuck the whole time. I had not thought of Creepy Joe SImpson since The Newlywed days. Then that was topped with Sandoval's acting. The thirst is real for Tom.

[yourmomiseasy]

5 hours ago, chick binewski said:

I also cannot imagine a more irritating threesome than Tom, Schaena and Ariana. One complaining that you're messing up their hair, one whining about her teeth hurting and one insisting you're interpreting the Kama Sutra incorrectly. 

Bwah!  I'm laughing because it's funny and it's funny because its true (thanks for explaining comedy Ariana! I wonder if she was semi-quoting Homer Simpson on purpose.).

I'm laughing so hard at Katie forgetting to put a line for the names on the RSVP cards of her expensive wedding invites.

How is FI doing a photo shoot with Joe Simpson something that happened in real life?

James' girlfriend's voice makes me want to stab my ears.

Pandora is really lucky to have been given that house.  I laughed at Katie saying she can't wait to grow up because I doubt she's going to grow up into a sweet house like that.

I liked Jax trying so hard to get the terminology right when talking about their drag party.  

Scheana went from zero to storming out pretty quickly.  The Shay issues must already be weighing on her at this point.

Jax was funny in Lisa's closet.  I could see why he would still be considered a good time and fun to be around even after all his lies and bs.  If I was Lisa I wouldn't want all my stuff getting torn up by the guys wearing it, but I guess my closet isn't as big as a house, she probably has stuff to spare.

Katie's description of Arianna during the fight with Schwartz was inspired.  Her description of Tom appearing all charming and sweet was spot on too.  And the recap is spot on with the gaslighting and his "she definitely drank today" bullshit.   

Edited February 7, 2017 by yourmomiseasy

[Ubiquitous]

A tearful Stassi gets some hard relationship advice from her little brother.

I was way too tired to watch last night, but didn't that happen before?

Finally, Sandoval, Jax and Ariana raid Lisa's fabulous closet to fulfill Schwartz's dream of dressing in drag for his bachelor party.

So I guess this week's ep wasn't about Jax's past?

[bichonblitz]

 Stassi is making it sound like she broke up with Patrick. And her little bro was feeling sorry for Patrick because now he's alllllll alone. Now Stassi is crying because she feels sorry for Patrick. I don't believe any of that. Stassi's crying because she see's what's out there and thinks she may have fucked up.  Patrick had a life before his 3 years with Stassi and I'm sure he has a life now. What a load of BS.

I was really proud of Scheana when she lost her cool at Pandora's lunch, fists pounding the table and storming off. Then she had to ruin it by coming back whimpering with her tail between her legs. Damn Scheana, you almost escaped the coven, why turn back?

I think the Tom's and Jax need to get real with their careers. They are in their mid 30's (Jax pushing 40). Hoollyweird is cruel. These guys have passed their prime.  Their modeling days are almost over and as far as acting, well, this gig is as good as it's going to get for them so they need to milk it for all it's worth and start saving their BRAVO money for a rainy day. Creepy Joe Simpson's advice "Stomach in, dick out" was pure gold!  Since when  is he a photographer? I thought he was an agent. 

[ghoulina]

I don't know what was better about Sandoval's modeling shoot - the fact that Joe Simpson was the photographer or the fact that he brought along a pack of Coors light? It's a toss up, really. 

Oh, and Ariana - "For thirty years I've despised models". So.....since you were one? I bet you were very serious about horses and comedy as a toddler, as well. 

James's girlfriend is so dumb. But we're not. We know you're shady as fuck, James. Quit fronting. 

How did that church Brittany took Jax to NOT go up in flames? If he thinks one stint on Sunday is going to appease her mother, he's dead wrong. Now it will be, "Why didn't you go back???"

Kristen's BF (Carter?) is soooo not into the drag idea. 

As for the meat of the episode, I'm generally not the biggest fan of Ariana and her "cool girl" attitude, but I thought she was the better person here. She chilled her tude a bit and made Stassi happy, so things should have been fine, right? Nope. Here comes Bulldozer Katie to trample everything and then act like the victim. Was there an actual apology? No. But Stassi  was fine, Ariana was fine, and Katie had to go making it a huge thing. Sigh....she exhausts me.

I continue to be baffled as to why she and Schwartz are getting married....or even together. If you can't even get through one dinner together....if you're hopping in a car and bailing on your fiance two times a week....you might just be a candidate for calling off the wedding. And moving out. To separate continents. Seriously. I mean, I wouldn't likely ever side with Katie because I think she's a bitch who can't let shit go and loves to make mountains out of holemills....so I don't necessarily blame Schwartz when he doesn't agree with her. BUT....then I'm like, WHY are you marrying her? If he never agrees with the shit she does, I don't think he likes her very much. I just really see nothing between those two. It's mind boggling. 

[Michichick]

I agree that Schwartz is a stealth jerk and to some degree he's gaslighting Katie. But I also think Katie acts like a bitch most of the time. And I am petty, so her excessive use of "like" drives me up a wall. Stassi is another "like" abuser.

What bothers me the most about Katie is how she talks over anyone who is disagreeing with her. She can't have a conversation because she doesn't want to listen; she just wants to forecefully keep stating her opinion until the other person agrees with her or at least gives up. If she could learn to have a conversation without being so fucking defensive, she'd be at least 75% less annoying to me. She keeps blathering on about how she's entitled to her feelings and her truth, but doesn't let anyone else express their thoughts unless those thoughts are "You're right, Katie."

[ghoulina]

10 hours ago, zoeysmom said:

How many more parties for Katie before the wedding?

Right? She's all, "This is MY day" - bitch, how many days you need? You've already had 777. 

 

9 hours ago, AngryCarrot86 said:

Joe Simpson? Wtf.  Had to laugh at FI's modeling AND (poor) acting all in

Sandoval has good bone structure, but not skills. Not a single smize to be had. 

[bichonblitz]

1 hour ago, ghoulina said:

Sandoval has good bone structure,

So do a gazillion other model and actor wannabe's in LA, except they are in their 20's. 

He's trying so hard to make that hair of his happen. Not working FI. 

[HunterHunted]

Schwartz displayed his passive aggressive undermining side that Katie has long accused him of having. However, I still can't find myself siding with Katie because she paid $18 each for wedding tea towel invitations and response cards that didn't even include a space for the guest's name so she literally has no clue who is attending. These are less than worthless because they didn't do the thing they are supposed to and they cost so much fucking money. The other reason I can't side with Katie is because she does has have an anger and alcohol problem. It just happened to not be on display during that dinner. Now that I know that Katie has a brain injury, I'm more irritated than ever that she won't participate in therapy because I suspect that some of her issues might actually be be explained by her brain injury and that both she and Schwartz need to understand that.

James' girlfriend is so dim or clearly desperate for fame. There is no way you can sit through that conversation with James and believe his bullshit unless you are either of those two things. 

Joe Simpson. That's really all I have to say about Sandoval's misguided attempts to get back into modeling and acting.

About Peter's sci-fi short film, I find that shorts that become films in that particular genre are often high concept and low budget in part because no one wants to give an unknown writer and director a $150 million budget. Alive in Joburg which would become District 9 is the best example. A lot of other shorts are senior thesis projects for graduating students. Alive in Joburg is the best example because it didn't have a ton effects and had a fairly simple log line: a space ship filled with alien refugees crashes in South Africa during apartheid and they get treated just like black people. Even the interviews obtained were clever because the filmmakers asked real people how they felt about new migrants to Johannesburg like Zimbabwean refugees and Nigerian migrants. They used those interviews as footage of people talking about the aliens by just snipping out references to Zimbabweans and Nigerians. Nothing about Peter's film looked simple. It looked like if it was to transition into a film it was going to be expensive.

Edited February 7, 2017 by HunterHunted

[Duke2801]

9 hours ago, Misslindsey said:

Hahaha! I love this! For me Katie gets more horrible each episode. Stassi and Ariana seemed to settle their issue as best as it is going to be for them, so I do not get why Katie needed to go on and on about it at the lunch, then at dinner with Tom. Just let it go Katie. Stassi seemed fine with the outcome. I thought Katie was making the whole thing a bigger deal than what it actually was. While I do think Tom can be passive aggressive, in this case with the Ariana situation, I think he is caught in the middle between his best friend and Katie. I also think that Tom seems like he is more willing to have an actual conversation about their issues, where as Katie gets mean if he disagrees with her. I get that she wants him to have her back, but often times I find Katie unreasonable, so I just do not care anymore. Why are these two getting married anyway?

I admit since I find the coven unbearable that I find myself being more okay with Ariana (and Scheana) than I used to. I am glad she did not apologize to Stassi. I guess I do not get the big deal about Ariana attending various events. As for Scheana, I so wanted her just to walk out on that lunch. The coven is always going to make Scheana their scapegoat and nothing she does is ever going to be good enough. Well, unless Katie, Stassi, and Kristen get mad at each other or something.

Sigh. I probably am a horrible person, but I am so sick of Stassi crying over Patrick. Also, while I think her little brother is the sane one in the family, stop trying to make him happen.

Sandoval's photo shoot with creepy Joe Simpson seemed strange. I was thinking what the fuck the whole time. I had not thought of Creepy Joe SImpson since The Newlywed days. Then that was topped with Sandoval's acting. The thirst is real for Tom.

 

Thank you for typing all of this out --- it saved me some time!  :) 

Needless to say, I agree with your comments. First off.  Joe Simpson? Ew.  His whole vibe is skeezy, but I was willing to give him a chance in the hopes that maybe he wasn't as creepy as he used to be. But then he made that "stomach in, dick out" comment and NOPE, it's all "welcome to Skeezeville. Population: You."

I'm torn on Sandovahl's new 'do.  On one hand, the 7th grader in me - who adored those skater boys with their "long on one side; shaved on the other" hairstyle - really digs it.  Then the adult in me says, wait, whoa, is that really an appropriate hairstyle for a man in his mid 30s?

I don't think Schwartz is perfect by any means, but Katie is now officially The Worst.  What an entitled, obnoxious brat.  When you start making Kristen look good in comparison, yeah, you've crossed the line, honey.  She and Schwartz clearly don't even like each other that much; I give them 5 years TOPS.  More like 2, really. 

Pandora's home is beautiful and way too classy for these shrieking banshees. 

[WhosThatGirl]

I feel bad for talking about Katie's behavior. Planning a wedding is stressful and aside from the ugly tea towel invitations which serve no purpose. I don't know. Schwartz isn't very helpful either. He just complains about the cost of everything. Which I've said before, weddings are expensive. A ceremony isn't. But a wedding is. Its just hard for me to judge her behavior. I've never personally planned a wedding.

[heatherchandler]

3 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Creepy Joe Simpson's advice "Stomach in, dick out" was pure gold!  Since when  is he a photographer? I thought he was an agent. 

He is the creepiest of the creeps.  I cannot believe he said that.  I imagine he invited Tom over for some "modeling" but didn't expect him to bring the cameras.  He wanted him all to himself, all alone if you catch my drift.

[whydoievencare]

2 hours ago, ghoulina said:

Right? She's all, "This is MY day" - bitch, how many days you need? You've already had 777. 

 

Shouldn't that be 666?

[heatherchandler]

24 minutes ago, Duke2801 said:

 

Pandora's home is beautiful and way too classy for these shrieking banshees. 

Her house is really nice inside, but the curb appeal is lacking.  I wonder how much that place cost - anyone have the details?

[Michichick]

27 minutes ago, HunterHunted said:

 Now that I know that Katie has a brain injury, I'm more irritated than ever that she won't participate in therapy because I suspect that some of her issues might actually be be explained by her brain injury and that both she and Schwartz need to understand that.

Katie has a brain injury? I missed something. What happened?

[HunterHunted]

1 minute ago, Michichick said:

Katie has a brain injury? I missed something. What happened?

Seven years ago. She fell through a skylight.

http://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/katie-maloney-vanderpump-rules-reveals-past-accident-and-injury

[zoeysmom]

6 minutes ago, HunterHunted said:

Schwartz displayed his passive aggressive undermining side that Katie has long accused him of having. However, I still can't find myself siding with Katie because she paid $18 each for wedding tea towel invitations and response cards that didn't even include a space for the guest's name so she literally has no clue who is attending. These are less than worthless because they didn't do the thing they are supposed to and they cost so much fucking money. The other reason I can't side with Katie is because she does has have an anger and alcohol problem. It just happened to no be on display during that dinner. Now that I know that Katie has a brain injury, I'm more irritated than ever that she won't participate in therapy because I suspect that some of her issues might actually be be explained by her brain injury and that both she and Schwartz need to understand that.

 

I think Schwartz entered into the dinner conversation with the intent to bring some resolve to the Ariana situation and Katie NEVER lets him finish.  Essentially, Katie and Stassi don't like Ariana because she refuses to like and dislike the same people they do, which changes from year to year.  They don't like her personality because she is more reserved, and less confrontational which they claim is an elitist attitude.   When Pandora was looking around her table who did she appreciate?  Certainly not the bride from hell,  her friend Scheana, or Stassi. 

We have no idea is Katie's small brain injury contributes to her personality, and it has been out there for awhile and with this group if there were an excuse, she would have played that card.  I mentioned it last week and it seems to have nit been a factor, as she sustained it before the show began. Real Katie is the one who wants the lovely home, but is such a dumbass she drops $50k on a weekday destination wedding.  The day after the wedding it stops being all about the bride and then it is just Schwartz and Katie, married edition. 

[Michichick]

@HunterHunted Thanks, I didn't know. I wonder if that did affect her personality at all.

Edited February 7, 2017 by Michichick

[zoeysmom]

12 minutes ago, heatherchandler said:

Her house is really nice inside, but the curb appeal is lacking.  I wonder how much that place cost - anyone have the details?

There is tons of conversation about it on the LVP thread RHOBH.  http://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/lisa-vanderpump-buys-daughter-pandora-a-house-for-her-30th-birthday

LVP bought Max a condo this year.

21 minutes ago, WhosThatGirl said:

I feel bad for talking about Katie's behavior. Planning a wedding is stressful and aside from the ugly tea towel invitations which serve no purpose. I don't know. Schwartz isn't very helpful either. He just complains about the cost of everything. Which I've said before, weddings are expensive. A ceremony isn't. But a wedding is. Its just hard for me to judge her behavior. I've never personally planned a wedding.

It doesn't matter, whatever Tom Schwartz says or does if it isn't exactly what Katie wants she fights with him.  Weddings don't have to be expensive. 

[TattleTeeny]

I'm kind of surprised that Stassi and Ariana don't like each other. For all of their faults described here, I feel like they're the two of the group who are actually kind of clever in their snarkishness, and neither seems to suffer fools as gladly as the rest do.

Edited February 7, 2017 by TattleTeeny

[yourmomiseasy]

3 hours ago, Michichick said:

I agree that Schwartz is a stealth jerk and to some degree he's gaslighting Katie. But I also think Katie acts like a bitch most of the time. And I am petty, so her excessive use of "like" drives me up a wall. Stassi is another "like" abuser.

What bothers me the most about Katie is how she talks over anyone who is disagreeing with her. She can't have a conversation because she doesn't want to listen; she just wants to forecefully keep stating her opinion until the other person agrees with her or at least gives up. If she could learn to have a conversation without being so fucking defensive, she'd be at least 75% less annoying to me. She keeps blathering on about how she's entitled to her feelings and her truth, but doesn't let anyone else express their thoughts unless those thoughts are "You're right, Katie."

I don't remember her being like this in early seasons.  Could it be that the stress of wedding planning and the constant undermining and gaslighting have gotten to her and she doesn't listen and keeps talking because she feels like she's not being heard?  Or maybe just being queen bee while Stassi was gone went to her head.

[HunterHunted]

4 minutes ago, yourmomiseasy said:

I don't remember her being like this in early seasons.  Could it be that the stress of wedding planning and the constant undermining and gaslighting have gotten to her and she doesn't listen and keeps talking because she feels like she's not being heard?  Or maybe just being queen bee while Stassi was gone went to her head.

We never saw much of Katie in the earlier seasons, but she was like this back then. What we saw of her is that she'd be drunk, angry, ragey, and would refuse to listen. Schwartz would dump a beer on her head. Also in the earlier seasons, Katie rarely disagreed with Stassi.

[heatherchandler]

1 hour ago, zoeysmom said:

There is tons of conversation about it on the LVP thread RHOBH.  http://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/lisa-vanderpump-buys-daughter-pandora-a-house-for-her-30th-birthday

LVP bought Max a condo this year.

It doesn't matter, whatever Tom Schwartz says or does if it isn't exactly what Katie wants she fights with him.  Weddings don't have to be expensive. 

I checked and there are still a few posts, but looks like most of the discussion was removed - it appears some shit went down!  I am actually starting to kind of remember that.

I am wondering if anyone has the address.  Curious what neighborhood it is in.

[OnceSane]

Katie was named "Tequila Katie" long before her wedding prep, even before that ridiculous "promise" ring Schwartz gave her to buy him some time before proposing.  I do think Schwartz downplays Katie's feelings & concerns and fobs her off with a "Go home, you're drunk" attitude.  OTOH, I think Katie has had these outbursts throughout their relationship, sometimes justified sometimes not.  And Schwartz is sick of it.  Why they don't just break up, IDK, but it's super unhealthy.  I won't be surprised if their marriage lasts longer than the Shays, but I don't see it lasting more than two years at most.

Sandoval's modeling was hilarious, especially with that hair.  Oh Tom!

Scheana should have left Pandora's house.  And when none of the covn  checked on her post-party, maybe she'd catch a clue.  These girls just aren't that into you, Scheana.  They just want someone else to cosign them when they fight with anyone (or at  on the outs with one or more members of the coven).

[Carolina Girl]

14 hours ago, zoeysmom said:

http://www.vulture.com/2017/02/vanderpump-rules-season-5-episode-14.html

How many more parties for Katie before the wedding?

I KNOW!  Geez.  Every wedding I can remember from my 20's had the one party for the bride - a bridal shower.  That's it.  Of course, I'm so old I pre-date the now generally-accepted and anticipated bacherlorette party - they were exceedingly rare in my "wedding heyday" but then I tried desperately to sidestep being part of the "wedding party" and the acquisition of ugly dresses so maybe it was a big thing that I just wasn't aware of. 

[psychoticstate]

I had to LOL at the VR producers sneaking in footage of Scheana being a Bridezilla right after she said she didn't act like Katie, no way, no how before her wedding.  Ha!  

Jax and Britt going to church.  Snooze.

StASSi getting life advice, once again, from her 11 year old brother.  Snooze.  (Although I will say getting advice, any advice, from him is better than the chucklefucks she normally associates with.) 

The Nugget really is a cold bitch, isn't she?  She never thought she would date a model because she haaaaates models.  She doesn't like StASSi and isn't going to even try to be nice to her around their friends because she's too real to do that.  Ugh.  Please STFU. How FI can stand her, I have no idea.  And BTW - - FI, the Nugget is actually combative, she just does it stealthily.  I think she wants people to argue with her so she can demonstrate her self-professed high IQ.  She really is a pill. 

Is it just me or does anyone else think it's strange that a straight guy's dream bachelor party involves dressing up as women?  Just me?  Okay. 

Schwartz may be an undercover dick to Tequila Katie but I just can't hate on him.  She's becoming more bitchified every week.  Look, your wedding day is your day.  Nothing else.  Not your bridal shower, not your engagement photos, not your invitation selection, not your bachelorette party.  Just your wedding.  That's it.  And it's Schwartz' day too so settle down.

Those two really shouldn't have gotten married.  They seem so ill suited for one another.  Katie clearly wants to get married for the sake of getting married.  She wants the wedding.  She's not thinking about the marriage and everything that follows. 

Leave it up to FI to draw a penis on the RSVP card.  Gah.  And how dreadful (TM Dwight, RHOA) that the RSVP cards did not have a space to indicate the respondent's name or even how many persons were attending. 

FI's photo shoot . . . Joe Simpson . . .ugh.  Both need to stop trying to make themselves happen.

Pandora's home is beautiful.  Tequila Katie - - this is what you want when you grow up?  (Not that it seems likely THAT will happen.)  And isn't Pandora your age?  

Congrats DJ Muppet Baby on finding a human in WeHo dumber than you are. 

[zoeysmom]

Katie the tyrant bride:  http://nymag.com/thecut/2017/02/vanderpump-rules-recap-season-5-episode-14-into-the-closet.html

Pretty much sums up her behavior.  Did Tom cheat on Katie while they were engaged?  I thought it before they were engaged?

[Mindthinkr]

LVP on Twitter stated that yes, Pandora got the house as a belated wedding/bday gift but she also got the mortgage. I took that to mean that Ken and LVP put enough of a down payment on the place to make it affordable for them. They could even be holding the mortgage (speculation). Max is a different story. He doesn't seem to have his sisters business acumen. They might have had to give him an equal amount (not to play favorites) but chose a condo as the money would go further on his budget, and his payments would be lower. 

[HunterHunted]

1 minute ago, Mindthinkr said:

LVP on Twitter stated that yes, Pandora got the house as a belated wedding/bday gift but she also got the mortgage. I took that to mean that Ken and LVP put enough of a down payment on the place to make it affordable for them. They could even be holding the mortgage (speculation). Max is a different story. He doesn't seem to have his sisters business acumen. They might have had to give him an equal amount (not to play favorites) but chose a condo as the money would go further on his budget, and his payments would be lower. 

I thought they were turning that Chi Chi La Rue store into a gastropub for Max to run.

[Mindthinkr]

Being good parents who want to see their children succeed that wouldn't surprise me. I think he worked from the ground up in LVP's businesses to get the total feel for how to run a restaurant and what it feels like to work each job in it. I hope you're correct and they have. 

[teapot]

14 hours ago, Misslindsey said:

 

I admit since I find the coven unbearable that I find myself being more okay with Ariana (and Scheana) than I used to. I am glad she did not apologize to Stassi. I guess I do not get the big deal about Ariana attending various events. As for Scheana, I so wanted her just to walk out on that lunch. The coven is always going to make Scheana their scapegoat and nothing she does is ever going to be good enough. Well, unless Katie, Stassi, and Kristen get mad at each other or something.

 

they were talking on the Pumped podcast (RIP) about how Scheana's the "fringe friend" and she's never gonna be "all the way in" the friend-group.  She wasn't part of their clique when the show started, and I feel like it's a love-hate frenemy sitch between her & Stassi (maybe deep down  (as in way deep down, not at all overtly) they're too much alike or something...)

I've been in that sitch, maybe you're just perpetually the "new girl" or something...but I think I would absolutely despise if my girlfriends called me out on EVERY SINGLE THING I did that they didn't like "oh, teapot, you shouldn't drink bottled water, it's bad for the environment...you're still wearing boots?  in April? how can you stand that $7 wine?" arrrgggghhhh...

but then again, it might be different if someone were essentially  paying me a quarter mil to wait tables, so...

Edited February 7, 2017 by teapot

[teapot]

4 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

 Alive in Joburg is the best example because it didn't have a ton effects and had a fairly simple log line: a space ship filled with alien refugees crashes in South Africa during apartheid and they get treated just like black people. Even the interviews obtained were clever because the filmmakers asked real people how they felt about new migrants to Johannesburg like Zimbabwean refugees and Nigerian migrants. They used those interviews as footage of people talking about the aliens by just snipping out references to Zimbabweans and Nigerians. Nothing about Peter's film looked simple. It looked like if it was to transition into a film it was going to be expensive.

not that anyone asked me...but I loved the beginning of that movie and I absolutely despised the end.

[Duke2801]

3 hours ago, yourmomiseasy said:

I don't remember her being like this in early seasons.  Could it be that the stress of wedding planning and the constant undermining and gaslighting have gotten to her and she doesn't listen and keeps talking because she feels like she's not being heard?  Or maybe just being queen bee while Stassi was gone went to her head.

I personally think it's the latter, combined with the fact that she always had the propensity to be a raging drunken loon. 

Of course, the wedding planning (while being filmed) certainly isn't helping matters.  

[ghoulina]

4 hours ago, WhosThatGirl said:

I feel bad for talking about Katie's behavior. Planning a wedding is stressful and aside from the ugly tea towel invitations which serve no purpose. I don't know. Schwartz isn't very helpful either. He just complains about the cost of everything.

I just can't see Katie letting him help. Unless by "help" he means do everything she wants, her way, without complaining. If Tom tried to offer input, she'd just brush it off and do what she wanted anyway. 

 

3 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

 

I'm kind of surprised that Stassi and Ariana don't like each other. For all of their faults described here, I feel like they're the two of the group who are actually kind of clever in their snarkishness, and neither seems to suffer fools as gladly as the rest do.

 

Arianna is the type of girl who has to stand out. She doesn't want some friend who is a lot like her. Look how different Scheana is. Ariana likes being the really chill "guys girl" who can do shots of whiskey in an RV. She likes being THE funny one. She doesn't want another girl around who is as funny as snarky as she is. 

And Stassi needs friends to kiss her ass and validate her constantly, and Ariana will never do that. They might have some traits in common, but they're a bad bad match. 

[teapot]

4 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

 

 

Arianna is the type of girl who has to stand out. She doesn't want some friend who is a lot like her. Look how different Scheana is. Ariana likes being the really chill "guys girl" who can do shots of whiskey in an RV. She likes being THE funny one. She doesn't want another girl around who is as funny as snarky as she is. 

And Stassi needs friends to kiss her ass and validate her constantly, and Ariana will never do that. They might have some traits in common, but they're a bad bad match. 

Long before this episode aired, Stassi said on her podcast that Scheana once told her that Arianna thought she (Stassi) was annoying. She said she was offended & bummed out because she really liked Arianna and she thought they had some stuff in common & a few good talks.  I think that's why she's so hurt

[Misslindsey]

4 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I just can't see Katie letting him help. Unless by "help" he means do everything she wants, her way, without complaining. If Tom tried to offer input, she'd just brush it off and do what she wanted anyway. 

I agree that I cannot see Katie letting Tom help either. Didn't Tom try to offer input on the budget? He was probably being a bit delusional about the wedding budget, but there is not any sort of compromise between these two. When Katie and Tom were at their wedding venue didn't Tom like something about the table settings, but Katie dismissed it, because she hated it? I might not be remembering the whole exchange correctly though.

[yourmomiseasy]

5 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I just can't see Katie letting him help. Unless by "help" he means do everything she wants, her way, without complaining. If Tom tried to offer input, she'd just brush it off and do what she wanted anyway. 

 

All he's done is complain about money and take passive aggressive jabs any time we've seen him be involved in wedding planning.  I wouldn't want to include him either.