Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[Wellfleet]

I don't think it's that complicated (or that Derrick is that complicated). I think Derrick likes attention and is a fame whore. People who seriously don't want to be in the spotlight don't go out to be their university's mascot; they don't become prayer buddies with a reality TV star & then want to date reality star's daughter.

 

Have to agree. Derick is with the Jill - all the Duggars really - because he likes getting attention without having to do anything - on his own - to earn it. Just as he got attention to being Pistol Pete without anyone knowing that he, Derick, was really in there. If I had to guess, I'd say he's not much of a risk-taker and/or has some self-confidence issues as well. And like most fundies, generally afraid of the Big Bad Real World.

[ChocolateAddict]

In the clip posted in the other thread (In the Media), Joy says that the Dullard's mission in Central America is "really dangerous".

 

Mmmm, there is a serious risk that Jill could fall over in her first-world kitchen or that Derrick could stab himself with a pencil as he learns the names of animals in Spanish.  Super dangerous times for the Dullards!

[JoanArc]

In the clip posted in the other thread (In the Media), Joy says that the Dullard's mission in Central America is "really dangerous".

 

Mmmm, there is a serious risk that Jill could fall over in her first-world kitchen or that Derrick could stab himself with a pencil as he learns the names of animals in Spanish.  Super dangerous times for the Dullards!

There is a lot of gang violence, murder, etc. Plus, they are 'famous' Americans with rich families, who'd pay ransoms, etc, so it's not so out there. Why they'd bring an infant with them, God only knows. Imagine if Jill had used birth control and they went (OMG that'd be the same thing as Murder, right?) as two instead of three.

 

This might be why they never leave a safe tourist city. I'm sure there's a lot of hanging out in the apartment, leaning one Spanish word a day, and feeling smug.

[Aja]

There is a lot of gang violence, murder, etc. Plus, they are 'famous' Americans with rich families, who'd pay ransoms, etc, so it's not so out there. Why they'd bring an infant with them, God only knows. Imagine if Jill had used birth control and they went (OMG that'd be the same thing as Murder, right?) as two instead of three.

 

Because it's not actually dangerous. There are areas where Jill and Derrick would certainly be at risk, but I'd be willing to bet pretty much everything I have (tens of dollars) that they are not in those areas.

[Missy Vixen]

Becoming an official missionary with the support of a major denomination is a lot easier said than done, especially with an organization that requires both members of the couple to qualify academically.

IMHO, of course: They have the money (PEOPLE exclusives! Televised wedding! Baby photos!) and they have the time. Imagine how nice life would be if one was sitting on as much as a quarter of a million in the bank and had nothing else to do but go to school and study. Same goes double for Jilly Muffin. While derickdillardduggar might have to get a second Bachelor's and finish up his M.Div, what else is he doing right now? One baby does not take up 24 hours a day. He's not working outside of their home. And this is Jilly Muffin's big chance to prove how great College Minus is, isn't it? Wasn't the requirement that she complete two years of related studies to qualify as a missionary candidate? She should be able to knock that out right after that carefully crafted breakfast.

 

Seriously. A Christian university is not going to force Triple D to take the core curriculum of any college education again (i.e., English, etcetera). He graduated from an accredited state school, so his freshman and sophomore credits would transfer. It's two years at most of concentrated study for his major. And he was allegedly "already working" on his M. Div, so I have a tough time believing it would be as onerous as it appears. Most missionary/pastoral studies students are living hand to mouth and working while paying gigantic tuition fees; Triple D and Jilly Muffin have money. And lots and lots of time.

 

I'm still sticking with my original assumption -- they're hiding out from press and process servers.

[NikSac]

They're hiding from the press/process servers. It's as simple as that. They were hoping that TLC would subsidize their "mission work", AKA permanent Central American vacation, but that remains to be seen. If they were really trying to "learn Spanish", why not move to a border state in the US or Los Angeles and work with the underprivileged? This would offer a great chance to practice that newly-acquired Spanish. Of course, they'd also be within a few hour plane ride of Tontitown and easily located by press and process servers, so that's out.

 

I feel like I missed something somewhere. What would she be getting charged with/served for?  Fraud? 

[JoanArc]

I feel like I missed something somewhere. What would she be getting charged with/served for?  Fraud?

Victim 5's lawsuit, Danica's lawsuit, etc...

[Missy Vixen]

I feel like I missed something somewhere. What would she be getting charged with/served for?  Fraud? 

She'll be subpoenaed by the porn star currently suing Joshley Madison as part of discovery. If the adult film performer in question has an even passable attorney, any deposition starring the four siblings will be the straw that broke the camel's back, IMHO.

 

And that passable attorney has already watched the footage from the FOX News interview and as much 19KAC as he or she can stand.

[NikSac]

Victim 5's lawsuit, Danica's lawsuit, etc...

 

Thanks. Would she be called as anything but a witness in either of those?  I am admitting my limited legal knowledge here, just can't figure out why she'd be served as I thought that'd only apply to someone who has legal proceedings filed against them. I can't see how there would be anything filed against her except potentially for the fraudulent fundraising for her vacation. Seems like Victim 5, Danica, etc. would all be Josh, plus maybe JB and M. I'm not arguing, just genuinely confused and curious.

 

Jill avoiding the press, on the other hand, I can definitely see!

 

ETA: thanks Missy Vixen, we cross-posted. I didn't realize a process server would be involved in a subpoena too, although it makes sense.

Edited December 9, 2015 by NikSac

[Missy Vixen]

Thanks. Would she be called as anything but a witness in either of those?  I am admitting my limited legal knowledge here, just can't figure out why she'd be served as I thought that'd only apply to someone who has legal proceedings filed against them.

I'm not a lawyer and I don't play one on TV. At the same time, we've been involved in a civil case that we were deposed for a few years ago. It was (without a doubt) the worst day of my life so far. The defendant's attorney was a Harvard Law grad, for instance. And there's a reason why depositions can be called the legal version of a root canal without anesthetic. Shorter version: It's possible to be asked about almost anything under oath whether it pertains to the suit in question or not. And I'd bet a lot on the idea that a certain Jilly Muffin would be asked questions about what happened in that household as she was growing up (and questions about her current "mission" activities and fundraising) that would create a firestorm if they ever saw the light of day. She was old enough at the time to witness and remember things her parents won't be enthralled about.

 

If the adult film star is successful, Victim 5 will come forward. And the discovery merry-go-round will start again. iMHO of course.

[Churchhoney]

In the clip posted in the other thread (In the Media), Joy says that the Dullard's mission in Central America is "really dangerous".

 

 

 

Joy did learn the meaning of the word "dangerous" from JIm Bob and Michelle, though. And for them "dangerous" includes looking at a woman in a miniskirt, knowing the tenets of a different religion, going to the supermarket by yourself, a woman having a job -- any job, us, etc. ..... So maybe her statements about danger need to be looked at from that perspective.

[GeeGolly]

I don't see how the Danica lawsuit would include deposing the Duggar girls. Her claim is that he had violent sex with her. Even considering the molestations, I don't see why a sister would be thought to have any knowledge of how Josh acts during sexual encounters.

[leighdear]

I don't see how the Danica lawsuit would include deposing the Duggar girls. Her claim is that he had violent sex with her. Even considering the molestations, I don't see why a sister would be thought to have any knowledge of how Josh acts during sexual encounters.

Agreed.  Josh wasn't even living in the same state at the time. How can there be any connection between Jill & Danica?  Why would a judge want any information from Jill?

Edited December 10, 2015 by leighdear

[bigskygirl]

Okay gang, once again please take the Josh and what he did discussion to his thread and leave it out of the Dillard thread. You have been warned more than once about this. Take to the Josh and Anna thread or find somewhere else to discuss it. Thank you.

[Wellfleet]

IMHO, of course: They have the money (PEOPLE exclusives! Televised wedding! Baby photos!) and they have the time. Imagine how nice life would be if one was sitting on as much as a quarter of a million in the bank and had nothing else to do but go to school and study. Same goes double for Jilly Muffin. While derickdillardduggar might have to get a second Bachelor's and finish up his M.Div, what else is he doing right now? One baby does not take up 24 hours a day. He's not working outside of their home. And this is Jilly Muffin's big chance to prove how great College Minus is, isn't it? Wasn't the requirement that she complete two years of related studies to qualify as a missionary candidate? She should be able to knock that out right after that carefully crafted breakfast.

 

Seriously. A Christian university is not going to force Triple D to take the core curriculum of any college education again (i.e., English, etcetera). He graduated from an accredited state school, so his freshman and sophomore credits would transfer. It's two years at most of concentrated study for his major. And he was allegedly "already working" on his M. Div, so I have a tough time believing it would be as onerous as it appears. Most missionary/pastoral studies students are living hand to mouth and working while paying gigantic tuition fees; Triple D and Jilly Muffin have money. And lots and lots of time.

 

I'm still sticking with my original assumption -- they're hiding out from press and process servers.

 

Completely agree. If Jill and Derick were truly interested in furthering their educations for any reason, they couldn't find a better time to do it than now - while they have only one child, and while money is not a concern. Despite what these 20-somethings think, it won't always be that way. Personally I think all the education talk is plain old blathering - they're saying what they think people expect to hear, mostly so the donations and love offerings continue to flow. I don't think Derick has any real intention of getting his M Div. If he was, I'm sure he'd be talking about, even sporadically. And Jill was done with what passes for education in her family the moment she became a mother.

[Aja]

I'm willing to bet the education talk is 100% lip service since, in Duggarland, being married with only one child is almost as bad as being married with no children. (Looking at you, FAMY.) Jill's got some other pressing goals.

Edited December 11, 2015 by Aja

[Churchhoney]

Completely agree. If Jill and Derick were truly interested in furthering their educations for any reason, they couldn't find a better time to do it than now - while they have only one child, and while money is not a concern. Despite what these 20-somethings think, it won't always be that way. Personally I think all the education talk is plain old blathering - they're saying what they think people expect to hear, mostly so the donations and love offerings continue to flow. I don't think Derick has any real intention of getting his M Div. If he was, I'm sure he'd be talking about, even sporadically. And Jill was done with what passes for education in her family the moment she became a mother.

 

I expect that Derick has been disheartened by realizing how hard it would be for Jill to get qualified, so he may just -- understandably -- figure, Why bother?. I gather that IMB expects both members of a couple to have qualifications, and that the assisting spouse would have to have a bunch of college coursework that Jill couldn't even begin to complete without first getting much more up to speed on, you know, high school.

 

And then, even if they went through it all -- and it wouldn't surprise me if it would take Jill five years or so, if she could even manage it, given her horrible background and the fact that she'll probably keep having kids -- Jill would have to compete against missionary wives who had actual college degrees, certainly advanced degrees in some cases, and certainly also real-world relevant experience -- such as teaching experience, executive experience, pastoring experience, volunteering or working abroad experience, fluency in one or several foreign languages, etc.  Some of the women she'd be competing against may well have all of those things.

 

 I don't think there's any way that she could win in such a competition, and I expect that Derick, who clearly has had some doings with IMB and probably knows at least a bit about their requirements, may know that, too. So, that being the case, he may figure that it's hopeless.... And, in fact, I'm pretty sure it is. Jill is just not going to make the cut. That leaves them looking for a Plan B. And since plenty of people seem to buy that S.O.S., for example, is a mission and a ministry, I can see why he might be looking at that kind of thing instead.

 

He's married a Duggar. He should have known what that meant on the education front, but I'm thinking he was probably a leghumper of some sort and bought their hype completely (Heck, when he bought in, a Duggar kid with the same academic background as Jill was working in a six-figure job in Washington and meeting with presidential candidates on a daily basis). I expect that only after the fact did he realize that there's no way a Duggar kid was going to qualify for something that requires formal academic background and real-world/work experience. So -- looking for Plan B, which has to require no such thing. 

Edited December 11, 2015 by Churchhoney

[kokapetl]

I'm sure there's almost no chance that Spanish teacher is just humouring her employer, but it's irrelevant since there's no chance Jill would ever notice if that were the case.

Edited December 11, 2015 by Kokapetl

[Aja]

 

Said the "Jill & Jessa: Counting On" star of her latest realization that her work is counting towards good in the area, "Last week, we were able to have my Spanish teacher and her two young sons (10 and 8 yrs. old) over to our place to watch, “Cuarto de Guerra” (“War Room”) and to have one of our favorite dinners, “Chicken Etti."

Duggarese DRIVES ME NUTS. Why is she always "able to do" stuff? Today I was able to talk to my Spanish teacher. Today we were able to go to the market. This week we were able to preach to a few choirs. Is it somehow holier to be able to do something instead of just doing it?

[Churchhoney]

 

I have a slight connection to the IMB world, and I have it on good authority that the IMB is presently cutting its budget and laying off staff. So even if Derick and Jill, as of this moment, had completed all the educational requirements to apply for apprentice/career missionary positions, they might not beat out the competition for any available positions. And as you explained so well, they are nowhere near being qualified enough to even apply. 

 

 

Exactly. The budget cutting can't help but mean that the competition will be even tougher. And it was already impossible ...

 

Also -- They showed The War Room when entertaining a 10- and an 8-year-old? Seriously?

[MichaelaRae]

Chicken Etti for Jesus. That's so going to be my garage band name.

[satrunrose]

 

I also share your opinion that Derick probably had no idea of the limits of Jill's education when they got married. As a graduate of a state university, Derick could look at the required college coursework for an IMB missionary's spouse and see it as do-able, although requiring some hard work and dedication. I bet he had no idea until after the wedding, that it would be way beyond Jill's abilities. She just doesn't have the educational background to tackle those courses. (Usual disclaimer that I'm not slamming homeschooling in general, but certainly slamming the Duggar version of it.) I'm not saying she's stupid, just that she'd have to do a lot of work to catch up. And I doubt she would ever want to do that in a million years anyway. She's happy playing midwife and having babies.

 

I wonder about that. None of us have actually had an real, live conversation with Jill, and yet it didn't take the PTV-ers long to establish that neither she nor any of her siblings are the sharpest of crayons (thank you, MEchelle and Booby prize), so you'd think that even with chaperoning and conversations limited to "My favourite Bible verse" and "Why birth control is EVIIIIIL" he would have some inkling that the Duggar version of TSODRT wasn't heavy on the kind of skills that you need for even basic college. 

 

Then again, the Gothard cult-speak does sound... I can't say smart, but that overly-wordy and old-fashioned turn of phrase does give the impression of being somewhat well-read, until you realize that they're using a lot of big words to say nothing in particular (and with really awkward grammar  - I just can't with purpose as a verb). I remember in first year university, being really in awe of the other first years that used these massive philosophical terms that I had never heard of, until I realized that the profs a. didn't talk like that and b. were rolling their eyes every time the "smart" folks asked a question. Maybe Derrick never got past the big words = smart point (which would go along with the general lack of critical thinking we're seeing). 

 

Also, if Churchhoney and Suz at Large are right, maybe that explains why Derrick bypassed Jana. He saw that Jill was "studying" to be a "midwife" and figured he was getting the smart Duggar. Snerk. Oh well. 

Edited December 12, 2015 by satrunrose

[Missy Vixen]

I also share your opinion that Derick probably had no idea of the limits of Jill's education when they got married.

One has to wonder what Triple D's reaction was when he noted this fact. One also has to wonder why he didn't bother to learn these type of things before he put a ring on it.

 

Talk about defrauding. It must be nice to know that he's going to spend the rest of his life dealing with everything in their lives that requires above an 8th grade education. IMHO, of course.

[Missy Vixen]

SO with you on this. Their weirdly unique disuse of language adds to the 'iF it looks like a cult and acts like a cult...' column. . WHO but Duggarlikes speak like this: '...to preach the gospel of Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior in the hope that the Lord will PLANT a church. Pray for us as we WORK IN THE LORD'S FIELDS. we DESIRE TO be used OF him to BUILD IN THE FAITH IN THOSE THAT ARE CHRISTIAN and SEE HIM SAVE SOULS'?????

A bazillion $ to anyone who can grammatically diagram that gem.

It's code. They can find other believers with their tortured use of the language. Here, let me have a try.

 

1. The Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ = Bible believing Christian.

2. Planting a church = opening a new church, preferably in a financially affluent area of the country. Tithes and offerings are important!

3. Pray for us as we work in the Lord's Fields = Pray for us as we convert/"save" as many people as possible, specifically those who don't ask many questions and are open to "love offerings", which are supporting those who don't care to get a 9-5, 40 hour a week job. Their "job" is "preaching the Good News", which means they're passing out tracts at the Krispy Kreme or telling those in a predominantly Catholic foreign country "about Jesus" while they "learn Spanish". Don't forget those love offerings!

4. We desire to be used by Him = Again, it's more fun to pass out tracts and "witness" via interpretive dance than work at a 9-5 job. Of course, it's important to tell all your friends and anyone else who will listen that you are in the business of winning the "lost", AKA those who've already heard the religious pitch and really aren't interested. Remember the offerings!

5. "Build the faith in those who are Christian and see Him save souls" = Evidently, the "faith" of some is so fragile that pestering others with constant chatter about Jesus and how He will "save" you from the pits of Hell (or worse, a marriage to Joshley Madison) is necessary to show they're all doing the right thing. And do I need to say it again -- offerings!

 

Seriously, it's all code. And as a former fundie, I've said the above and worse. The more one can load his or her speech up with Christianese, the holier one is thought to be. And of course, the above is all IMHO.

Edited December 12, 2015 by Missy Vixen

[JoanArc]

 

I wonder about that. None of us have actually had an actual conversation with Jill, and yet it didn't take the PTV-ers long to establish that neither she nor any of her siblings are the sharpest of crayons

A, uh, less than intelligent woman is easier to control, so that's a plus for Derick. He knew she wouldn't cheat, had her virginity, as well as a simple-headed expectation about romantic relationship. After a few dates, I think he thought he's be wearing the pants in the relationship. He never saw that Jill (and Jim Bob) would so totally(!) run roughshod over his life. You know how they talk about terrforming other planets - Derick was Duggarformed. They'll probably burn his diploma to say warm this winter.

[Missy Vixen]

You know how they talk about terrforming other planets - Derick was Duggarformed. They'll probably burn his diploma to say warm this winter.

And one has to ask, because one is staggered by this entire conversation: What kind of dumbass chooses to marry another person that is so ill-equipped to be an equal partner in any marriage? Does he have the slightest clue of what would happen to his family, for instance, if he was unable to serve as The Headship and The Breadwinner?

 

Again, my opinion. And I'm still not watching on Sunday. I can't stand to listen to any more of Jilly Muffin and Jessa Blessa's BS about the "ebil liberal media".

 

[JoanArc]

 

What kind of dumbass chooses to marry another person that is so ill-equipped to be an equal partner in any marriage?

Someone really insecure/unsure of his skills? Someone who wants to do things the 'right way' at all times? Plus, a famewhore wannabe. Maybe Derick's been bullied in the past, or asked girls out and gotten rejected, and laughed at? He passively acquired a wife by the easiest means possible - this is the fundamentalist version of a mail order bride type relationship.

[Kiss my mutt]

Gosh, Derrick doesn't look like the most robust individual. He's one major illness/infection away from being really compromised.

Jill is a dud and a bore that tries to act lively by raising her eyebrows and flashing her gummy smile in her photos.

They are both arrogant and ignorant thinking they have anything to offer in Guatemala. If you had a life long goal of ministering in Latin America you'd think you would have studied the language more. They are going to do more harm than good because their motives are self serving and I don't see any clear objectives for this trip.

[Churchhoney]

SO with you on this. Their weirdly unique disuse of language adds to the 'iF it looks like a cult and acts like a cult...' column. . WHO but Duggarlikes speak like this: '...to preach the gospel of Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior in the hope that the Lord will PLANT a church. Pray for us as we WORK IN THE LORD'S FIELDS. we DESIRE TO be used OF him to BUILD IN THE FAITH IN THOSE THAT ARE CHRISTIAN and SEE HIM SAVE SOULS'?????

A bazillion $ to anyone who can grammatically diagram that gem.

 

Check out those Gothard signs they have hanging around the house. It's amazing that there as coherent as they are, what with looking at those all the time.

 

Torturing language is job one for a cult leaders, I guess. So they've learned it from their chief high headship.

[Churchhoney]

And one has to ask, because one is staggered by this entire conversation: What kind of dumbass chooses to marry another person that is so ill-equipped to be an equal partner in any marriage? Does he have the slightest clue of what would happen to his family, for instance, if he was unable to serve as The Headship and The Breadwinner?

 

Again, my opinion. And I'm still not watching on Sunday. I can't stand to listen to any more of Jilly Muffin and Jessa Blessa's BS about the "ebil liberal media".

 

 

I don't know why, but Derick strikes me as a somewhat developmentally arrested (not as bad as the Duggars, but childlike nevertheless...) over-idealistic dreamer who can be a hard worker at times but who also is far far far from being the sharpest tool in the shed. If somebody like that becomes enamored of a person -- and, in this case, even more so, of her whole family -- I can see how they could go quite badly astray, pursuing a romantic vision that's actually a complete mirage...

 

I expect that almost all the leghumpers would be shocked if they knew what the Duggar life plan actually does to people and what kind of "adults" it produces, actually.

Edited December 12, 2015 by Churchhoney

[Missy Vixen]

I don't know why, but Derick strikes me as a somewhat developmentally arrested (not as bad as the Duggars, but childlike nevertheless...) over-idealistic dreamer who can be a hard worker at times but who also is far far far from being the sharpest tool in the shed. If somebody like that becomes enamored of a person -- and, in this case, even more so, of her whole family -- I can see how they could go quite badly astray, pursuing a romantic vision that's actually a complete mirage...

 

I expect that almost all the leghumpers would be shocked if they knew what the Duggar life plan actually does to people and what kind of "adults" it produces, actually.

I have to wonder if his parents had any idea about all this, especially his mom. She had enough on her plate with a husband that died very young and knowing that she needed to support her family. What kind of dolt (and I'm speaking of Triple D here) marries a woman that is seemingly the exact opposite of his mother? Did he do this on purpose, or does he resent Cathy so much for not staying home to cut the crusts off of his PB&J's when he was in junior high? Does he think about the preparation he most likely needs to make because he married a 23-going-on-16 year old? Here's the big one: Does he regret that covenant marriage yet, or is he still so starry-eyed and starstruck that he hasn't figured out (despite the near-disaster of Izzy's birth) that his wife doesn't have the common sense or education to come in out of the rain?

 

I wonder how long the leghumpers would last stuck in a room with one or more of that family. The only topic of conversation: Jesus. More Jesus. Let's read the Bible. Right after that, we'd talk about Jesus again, and then there would be more conversation about Jesus. They can't discuss current events, art (aside from the Creation Museum) books, shared activities, movies, school friends, work friends, bla bla bla. They don't have hobbies. They're masters at ignoring unpleasant realities and events because after all, discussing it or getting help for it means it really happened.

 

Normal people would invite a new friend over for dinner and play a board game, chat about whatever they might have in common, whatever. Inviting a friend over for dinner in Jilly Muffin and Triple D's world means an evangelism opportunity.

[Churchhoney]

I have to wonder if his parents had any idea about all this, especially his mom. She had enough on her plate with a husband that died very young and knowing that she needed to support her family. What kind of dolt (and I'm speaking of Triple D here) marries a woman that is seemingly the exact opposite of his mother? Did he do this on purpose, or does he resent Cathy so much for not staying home to cut the crusts off of his PB&J's when he was in junior high? Does he think about the preparation he most likely needs to make because he married a 23-going-on-16 year old? Here's the big one: Does he regret that covenant marriage yet, or is he still so starry-eyed and starstruck that he hasn't figured out (despite the near-disaster of Izzy's birth) that his wife doesn't have the common sense or education to come in out of the rain?

 

 

 

Yeah, I completely agree. The Cathy connection is just baffling. Can't help but think that there isn't at least some degree of resentment or some neurotic something behind it. 

 

I can't imagine that he -- and Ben -- won't have buyers' remorse eventually. But it makes you wonder how soon it'll hit. I actually sort of think it's hit Derick a bit already, but I don't know why I think that. 

[Missy Vixen]

And since I'm good and wound up over this whole thing right now, ;-) Jim Boob and J-Chelle spent more time grilling Triple D over his use of any credit card than they did ensuring he and Jilly Muffin had any clue at all about the realities of being married to another person. Budgeting, bills, in-laws (OMG), children, illness, job loss or career decisions -- none of it was important as long as nobody used a credit card!

[Wellfleet]

Someone really insecure/unsure of his skills? Someone who wants to do things the 'right way' at all times? Plus, a famewhore wannabe. Maybe Derick's been bullied in the past, or asked girls out and gotten rejected, and laughed at? He passively acquired a wife by the easiest means possible - this is the fundamentalist version of a mail order bride type relationship.

 

Excellent, spot-on post. 

[Wellfleet]

Yeah, I completely agree. The Cathy connection is just baffling. Can't help but think that there isn't at least some degree of resentment or some neurotic something behind it. 

 

I can't imagine that he -- and Ben -- won't have buyers' remorse eventually. But it makes you wonder how soon it'll hit. I actually sort of think it's hit Derick a bit already, but I don't know why I think that. 

 

We're sort of assuming that Derick's parents had a relatively good marriage. What if they really didn't? What if - by choosing Jill - Derick was actively trying to avoid whatever he might have seen as a problem in his parents' marriage? Maybe his dad didn't like the fact that Cathy had a career? Maybe he wanted her home with the boys? Maybe it was a large bone of contention in their marriage. Maybe Derick blames his mother in some way for his father's death? Maybe something else - who knows? But I don't think the fact that Cathy and Jill are so different makes Derick's choice of Jill that strange. He might have been trying to find someone as different from his mother as he could. Outside of Fundieland, it would have to be difficult to find someone who never wanted to work outside the home and would be happy doing the domestic/baby dance for the rest of her life. And I still think Derick is one of those guys that is enormously shy and gawky on the whole dating scene. This way he got a bride with virtually no uncomfortable awkwardness on his part at all. He didn't even have to do something as basic as walk up and introduce himself. Grownups handled all the preliminaries for him.

[Churchhoney]

This way he got a bride with virtually no uncomfortable awkwardness on his part at all. He didn't even have to do something as basic as walk up and introduce himself. Grownups handled all the preliminaries for him.

 

Yeah, pretty clear that the courtship way wouldn't be tolerated by anyone who called their souls their own, isn't it?  ... Good method of preselection there if you're a culty parent, I guess.

[queenanne]

Duggarese DRIVES ME NUTS. Why is she always "able to do" stuff? Today I was able to talk to my Spanish teacher. Today we were able to go to the market. This week we were able to preach to a few choirs. Is it somehow holier to be able to do something instead of just doing it?

 

Well, yeah.  Because being "able", means you are "able-bodied", i.e. not physically limited.  

 

And also, "not dead".

 

But only by the grace of God, because it's a miracle the sun rises every morning, and only His kind and godly offices that let you reach the end of another dangerous day without being smote ded.

[cmr2014]

We're sort of assuming that Derick's parents had a relatively good marriage. What if they really didn't? What if - by choosing Jill - Derick was actively trying to avoid whatever he might have seen as a problem in his parents' marriage? Maybe his dad didn't like the fact that Cathy had a career? Maybe he wanted her home with the boys? Maybe it was a large bone of contention in their marriage. Maybe Derick blames his mother in some way for his father's death? Maybe something else - who knows? But I don't think the fact that Cathy and Jill are so different makes Derick's choice of Jill that strange. He might have been trying to find someone as different from his mother as he could. Outside of Fundieland, it would have to be difficult to find someone who never wanted to work outside the home and would be happy doing the domestic/baby dance for the rest of her life. And I still think Derick is one of those guys that is enormously shy and gawky on the whole dating scene. This way he got a bride with virtually no uncomfortable awkwardness on his part at all. He didn't even have to do something as basic as walk up and introduce himself. Grownups handled all the preliminaries for him.

 

I think that we are making the mistake of assuming that Derick thinks that Jill is very different from his mother, but I don't know that that's the case. Jill was presented to Derick as a young woman with goals: becoming a midwife and a missionary. Jill dropped that pretense like a bad habit the minute she got pregnant, and I think it was Derick wo encouraged her to complete her midwife training.

 

As far as I know, while the Dillard family may have been normal religious southern family, the death of Mr. Dillard was what seemed to push them over the edge into full-blown fundie-dom.

[kokapetl]

I don't think Jill was presented as particularly goal driven, I think Derick married Jill assuming she was a normal functional person who was mostly just keen to start a family. Only after the wedding did he discover that she practically needed 24/7 companionship, that she didn't have the skills to cope with normal stuff like being separated from her husband 9-5 weekdays, that's when I think he probably suggested she follow up with the midwifery thing.

[Churchhoney]

Duggarese DRIVES ME NUTS. Why is she always "able to do" stuff? Today I was able to talk to my Spanish teacher. Today we were able to go to the market. This week we were able to preach to a few choirs. Is it somehow holier to be able to do something instead of just doing it?

 

I wonder whether it's shorthand for "by the grace of God I was able to do this"? or some such? .... It drives me nuts too, but I suppose it would be even worse if she said something like that twice in every sentence.

 

ETA: Ooops. I see that queenanne got there ahead of me.

Edited December 12, 2015 by Churchhoney

[GeeGolly]

I think Jill & Derrick are well matched on most levels. 

[awaken]

Duggarese DRIVES ME NUTS. Why is she always "able to do" stuff? Today I was able to talk to my Spanish teacher. Today we were able to go to the market. This week we were able to preach to a few choirs. Is it somehow holier to be able to do something instead of just doing it?

 

 

SO with you on this. Their weirdly unique disuse of language adds to the 'iF it looks like a cult and acts like a cult...' column. . WHO but Duggarlikes speak like this: '...to preach the gospel of Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior in the hope that the Lord will PLANT a church. Pray for us as we WORK IN THE LORD'S FIELDS. we DESIRE TO be used OF him to BUILD IN THE FAITH IN THOSE THAT ARE CHRISTIAN and SEE HIM SAVE SOULS'?????

A bazillion $ to anyone who can grammatically diagram that gem.

 

 

I find it very funny that their biggest openings so far have been opportunities that would easily be available in any US city- learning spansih, inviting people over for dinner and a movie, joining a Bible study group, going to church.  

Edited December 13, 2015 by bigskygirl
Part of post off topic

[Quilt Fairy]

There is something karmic in the fact that over in the Counting On thread (which is locked, so I can't post this there) the ad that comes up is for birth control.

[leighdear]

Then again, the Gothard cult-speak does sound... I can't say smart, but that overly-wordy and old-fashioned turn of phrase does give the impression of being somewhat well-read, until you realize that they're using a lot of big words to say nothing in particular

I call it Word Salad with Psycho Dressing. 

 

Charles Manson spoke that way too, during his murder trials.  

Edited December 13, 2015 by leighdear

[JoanArc]

I call it Word Salad with Psycho Dressing. 

 

Charles Manson spoke that way too, during his murder trials.  

Michelle probably yelled Helter Skelter during every labor.

[Chicklet]

Derrick and Jillybeans could have saved themselves lots of effort and hung around a home improvement center and learned spanish from the dayworkers while they waited to be picked up for jobs. Then they could have driven the car to the 7-11 (which doesn't sell ebil alcohol due to Meechell) and gotten out to hand tracts to unsuspecting customers- this is what my local Jehovah's Witnesses do.

There! I've solved all their problems and they could have done it on the CHEEP. TV could have even filmed it all on the sly and pretended they were "overseas".

On the subject of is Jill like his mother, most people unconsciously search out people just like one of their parents. Known quantity and all, right? He zeroed right in on her and snapped her up lest someone else plant dibs on her and her special christiany skills.

[Fuzzysox]

Duggarese DRIVES ME NUTS. Why is she always "able to do" stuff? Today I was able to talk to my Spanish teacher. Today we were able to go to the market. This week we were able to preach to a few choirs. Is it somehow holier to be able to do something instead of just doing it?

Yes, yes, yes! They way they speak is annoying.

 

Jill saying we will come out of this fire, umm sounds like a line from a bad soap opera. I have NEVER heard anyone talk like that.

[Wellfleet]

Yes, yes, yes! They way they speak is annoying.

 

Jill saying we will come out of this fire, umm sounds like a line from a bad soap opera. I have NEVER heard anyone talk like that.

 

 

Neither have I. But I bet Jill has. All her life. All this typical fundie hyperbole and flowery language -from the only outsiders that have ever been in her life - preachers and fellow fundies etc.

[Ljohnson1987]

Boycott the specials. Show TLC you will not tolerate the Duggars exploiting Jill and Jessa.

[RazzleberryPie]

Being 'able to do something' indicates that it's just such a privilege for y'all to continue to give us love offerings so we can continue. You enabling us gives you a sense of ownership so you'll dig a little deeper into your pockets to support our ministry.