Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[BitterApple]

This has been bugging me for awhile. Why do some of you guys refer to Ben as Bin? Is there some fundie joke I missed? I tried to figure it out and I can't, lol.

It's a reference to their Southern accents and how they pronounce -en sounds as -in. Somehow the nickname has stuck!

[PinkSprinkles]

It's also ironic in a sad way (I mean this sincerely) because the Duggars treat him like he belongs in a bin. Even if the kid is annoying no one deserves the treatment we have seen him receive on the show. If he's good enough to date one of the holy Duggar daughters then their actions toward him should show this. 

[Ljohnson1987]

Jessa is also training to be a midwife. Can't the girls do anything else?

[Fuzzysox]

What Jessa is studying? I thought her lot in life was to get married and look in the mirror all day, take selfies and if she has kids dumping them on MEchelle.

[DangerousMinds]

At least they are training for something!

[TobyBelle]

I'm surprised Jessa would be a midwife. There was that one episode she accompanied Jana and Jill on a birth so she could be videographer and she looked freaked out and uncomfortable when it was time for delivery.

[Fuzzysox]

I know why Jessa is studying being a midwife it's becasue the book is already in their house and she doesn't have to shell out any money to buy new. She already saved the difference.

 

In all seriousness sounds like she is jealous of Jill. 

[Mariva]

Jessa is also training to be a midwife. Can't the girls do anything else?

When/where did she say this? As far as I know Jessa has never studied or expressed any interest whatsoever in becoming a midwife.  Maybe she's just saying it so she could look more like Jill? If people are doubting that Jill will finish her midwife training then there's even less of a snowball's chance in hell that Jessa will ever take the time away from primping in front of the mirror to open an anatomy textbook.

[Ljohnson1987]

It was stated in an Us Magazine article.

[jodo]

Isn't US like The Enquirer for lack of facts, I mean they seem to sensationalize everything the same way so I am not sure?

Edited September 28, 2014 by jodo

[trimthatfat]

I'm actually reading that  US Weekly issue right now. It does say Jessa is a 'midwife trainee'. The article also refers to Ben as a 'real estate apprentice'.

 

The article has direct quotes from Jessa and Jill, so it's possible that US is just going by what they were told.

Edited September 28, 2014 by trimthatfat

[abseedee]

When/where did she say this? As far as I know Jessa has never studied or expressed any interest whatsoever in becoming a midwife.  Maybe she's just saying it so she could look more like Jill? If people are doubting that Jill will finish her midwife training then there's even less of a snowball's chance in hell that Jessa will ever take the time away from primping in front of the mirror to open an anatomy textbook.

Just looked at the Arkansas Lay Midwife Apprentices as of 9/9/2014 Jessa's not listed.  Jana and Jill still are and their permits expire 8/31/2015.  Is it study first and then apprentice at a later date?  If so, then that may be the reason why Jessa isn't listed yet.  I've never heard it expressed that that is her interest either..  Maybe she's heard that people are talking about Jill not continuing her midwifery and thought it would be a good opportunity for her to say that she is interested in it.  Time will tell if she is really going to pursue it or if it is just talk.

[Mariva]

It was stated in an Us Magazine article.

Sounds like jealously like Fuzzysox mentioned or she's doing it solely for the cameras. I don't see Jessa as having the right personality or passion like her sister to become a midwife.  Honestly if Jessa wanted to find something to do so she could support herself (god knows her future husband can barely afford to) and not seem like a lazy sack around the house, why can't she just enroll in cosmetology school? At least that's something she's interested in and could actually be quite good at.

[Mariva]

I'm actually reading that  US Weekly issue right now. It does say Jessa is a 'midwife trainee'. The article also refers to Ben as a 'real estate apprentice'.

 

The article has direct quotes from Jessa and Jill, so it's possible that US is just going by what they were told.

Funny because I read a recent article where Ben refers to himself as doing "property maintenance" for Jim Bob. Ben also claimed in that article that he's going to support Jessa and their future litter of kids by becoming a missionary or doing speaking engagements (where I'm sure he'll spew his brand of anti-Catholicism, holocaust = abortion messages). Hmm, so it's looking more and more like both Jessa and Ben are trying to copy Jill and Derick?

 

Edited to add a link to the article that I'm referring to

Edited September 28, 2014 by Mariva

[bigskygirl]

It is a gift from God, and we cannot wait to enjoy the gift. God will decide if or when we move. I guess they consider Jim Bob God. And why would people want to hear Ben speak. Seriously...

[Fuzzysox]

I can see Boob teaching Bin the real estate business. As for Jessa hell to the no will she ever be a midwife. She has no interest in it.

[GEML]

I usually try not to be too snarky, but the thought of Jessa as a midwife and Ben as a public speaker is, well, it's just hilarious.

And what's sad is that they are a lot like a younger Michelle and Jim Bob. Ben probably would do fairly well in sales, and Jessa, as others have pointed out, could easily take on a salon inside her home and probably do pretty well at it.

It's a shame to watch their ideology force people into places they don't belong, even when there are other, equally acceptable choices open to them if anyone thought about it for ten minutes.

[truthtalk2014]

. Ben also claimed in that article that he's going to support Jessa and their future litter of kids by becoming a missionary or doing speaking engagements 

We all know what an eloquent speaker he is.  

[trimthatfat]

Funny because I read a recent article where Ben refers to himself as doing "property maintenance" for Jim Bob. Ben also claimed in that article that he's going to support Jessa and their future litter of kids by becoming a missionary or doing speaking engagements (where I'm sure he'll spew his brand of anti-Catholicism, holocaust = abortion messages). Hmm, so it's looking more and more like both Jessa and Ben are trying to copy Jill and Derick?

 

Edited to add a link to the article that I'm referring to

 

Weird. Maybe he's a property-maintaining-real-estate-apprentice? Say that three times fast.

 

It looks ridiculous to marry your child (who has never had a job and has not advanced her schooling past high school) off to a young man who has no degree, a very short history, and no real marketable skills, so maybe Ben and Jessa are being instructed to mention certain occupations to the press so they appear like they are ready to be husband and wife.

 

I honestly could not see Jessa in an industry that requires people skills and sensitivity. She doesn't seem to have the patience needed to be a midwife. She loves to make herself look good, but she doesn't seem like the type who could stand on her feet for several hours a day to provide services for clients as a hairstylist or makeup artist. Honestly, she just comes off like she has a poor work ethic...like the type of person who goes on a work break for an hour and a half and wonders why she's getting written up by her boss. I get it though - it's never been instilled in her how to be a professional because that's not her purpose as a woman (according to their belief system).

Edited September 28, 2014 by trimthatfat

[Fuzzysox]

New topic for us to talk about. The Pickles and Hairspray FB page has a thread about Jessa not having the original ring on but a completely different engagement ring! Wonder why?? 

[jodo]

We all know what an eloquent speaker he is.  

 

"duh, I luv Jessa, giggle giggle giggle, I luv Jessa more giggles..."  He giggles like a girl.  I noticed in that video of them posted on one of the threads he is trying to sing but doesn't know the words!!!  Too funny and yet he is wearing glasses like he is reading the words and he can't do it even then!!  

[Joe Jitsu913]

It is a gift from God, and we cannot wait to enjoy the gift. God will decide if or when we move

Wow, it must be nice to be a Duggar. You never have to think for yourself because... JESUS!

[wanderwoman]

Reading between the lines: Bin is unemployed. Jessa is going to become Jana's new accountability buddy for midwifery (since Jill is about to start playing "Midwifery- the home game". Bin will be learning to follow after Jim Bob since his "business" was actually no more than a teenaged lawn cutting venture. And, that starcasm article is seriously messed up in stating that Michelle and Jim Bob waited for marriage to be "intimate" (I guess that's fundy speaking for hiding the sausage).

Wow, it must be nice to be a Duggar. You never have to think for yourself because... JESUS!

And, if Jesus doesn't come through with the answers, there's always Jim Bob. :/

[ginger90]

I have nothing against believing in God. However, it irks me to no end when people leave some things up to God. Moving, really? For goodness sakes I hope if there is a God there would be other things to be concerned about.

[fliptopbox]

I have nothing against believing in God. However, it irks me to no end when people leave some things up to God. Moving, really? For goodness sakes I hope if there is a God there would be other things to be concerned about.

I agree. I also hate when people tell me they will pray for me. Um ok. I don't see how anyone else praying for me would help any more than praying on my own behalf. If I were into that sort of thing in the first place.

[Barb23]

Trimthatfat--I agree with you about Jessa couldn't stand to be on her feet all day, waiting on others as a hair stylist. My niece just started in Cosmetology program at the Vo-tech Ctr in high school & loves it. The first thing they are learning are the "social skills": how to greet the client, asking them what they want done etc. I just can't see Jessa inateracting with others with her "I'm prettier than you/holier than thou attitude." My niece's teacher is a stickler about attendance & being on time as these are very important when they will be working as a stylist. So Duggar time wont work here.

[HeyNow]

And, if Jesus doesn't come through with the answers, there's always Jim Bob. :/

Oh, I'm sure Jim Bob has a few "friendly suggestions" for Him, too!

[cereality]

So it looks like it's official that they are staying on the compound for a while -- as they're telling people they'll be in NW Arkansas for a few yrs and then open to wherever God takes them. I think they're saying the property management and midwifery stuff because along with the "OMG you're so young, I can't believe you're getting married" question from media etc., I bet the follow up is "how will you support yourselves?" Most reasonable people want their kids to have some means of support before taking a spouse and when the groom is 19 -- the natural question is 'uh you haven't done college or trade school yet, what are you going to do for money."

 

Jessa certainly cannot be a midwife. There is some science education there, and I'm positive Jill struggled with it given her lack of even a normal HS education. However she struggled through it because she was intent on becoming a midwife (until she met a man). Jessa -- I don't see her struggling through something she doesn't even want. Not to mention -- her lack of people skills won't help when she's in the birthing rooms. Laboring women cannot just hurry up because their princess of a midwife is annoyed that they're not done yet. And Jessa should know better than anyone bc of her mother -- laboring women cry, scream, need help w bathroom issues and sometimes just need reassurance; I don't see Jessa doing any of that.

 

Is it even true that they get to have private conversations as Jessa says?? Doesn't seem like it -- looks like chaperones are right there at all times. The Bates' method is a bit different -- they've even said that chaperones may go to dinner with the couple but won't sit at the same table, so there is a chance to talk. And around the house, Kelly Bates has said there are chaperones because people are in and out of the room where the couple is hanging out (which is natural in such a big family -- you can't exactly give up use of the family room bc Chad is visiting for an afternoon) but no one is sitting with the couple. That's not what we've seen in the Duggar home.

 

And last point -- I'm not Christian but am in one of the major religions that bears a lot of similarity to Christianity. Isn't it true that you pray for God's support/guidance/help, but you have to act on our own. Meaning if you want a job or a move or whatever -- you pray but you also send out resumes or hire movers or whatever? Isn't that the whole "God helps those who help themselves" thing? I don't get the Duggars' views of -- we'll go wherever God moves us -- bc if you're waiting for God without pursuing opportunities any place else, you may not go any place besides NW Arkansas.

[GEML]

Believe it or not, in certain parts of the country, there actually would be a market for what used to be called, when I was growing up, "Holiness hair." It used to be a particular swirled up variation on the 1960's beehive, but now looks like the Duggar girls' hair. That Jessa lacks the people skills wouldn't be as important as the ability to get the look right and that she comes from a modest tradition herself and would know not to embarrass her clients by certain things like magazines in the waiting room, asking certain questions, etc.

So many times we try and take the Duggars and fit them into our culture, but the truth is they probably will never need to go there. They can stay within their own where the rules (Gothard aside) are slightly different and most of them will probably be fine with a little luck.

[DangerousMinds]

It is a gift from God, and we cannot wait to enjoy the gift. God will decide if or when we move. I guess they consider Jim Bob God. And why would people want to hear Ben speak. Seriously...

Has Bin seen himself on this show? One of the most dim, awkward kids I've seen.

[abseedee]

Trimthatfat--I agree with you about Jessa couldn't stand to be on her feet all day, waiting on others as a hair stylist. My niece just started in Cosmetology program at the Vo-tech Ctr in high school & loves it. The first thing they are learning are the "social skills": how to greet the client, asking them what they want done etc. I just can't see Jessa inateracting with others with her "I'm prettier than you/holier than thou attitude." My niece's teacher is a stickler about attendance & being on time as these are very important when they will be working as a stylist. So Duggar time wont work here.

I was a cosmetologist for a few years and I remember a couple of nit picky customers that no matter what you do they won't be happy.  I remember one for some reason didn't like me from the time of introduction and didn't like the end result so I had to ask my manager for help.  All my manager did was build a conversation and didn't do anything to change the style but move a couple of strands and the customer was happy, lol!  I don't know if Jessa will be able to work with or have any patience with this type of person. 

Edited September 29, 2014 by abseedee

[msblossom]

What does Ben's dad do for a living? Is it possible that his dad could step in and give him some direction or give him some gainful employment?

I would not be okay with my 19 year old son not going to college and getting married. I know college isn't for everyone, but getting a college degree opens a lot more doors to success than the alternative.

Ben's father looks like he does alright and he must realize that his son can't just do odd jobs for the Duggars indefinitely. This kid needs help.

I have to wonder what Ben's parents were thinking by encouraging him to take up JB's offer to live with and work for the Duggars.

[Almost 3000]

Oddly when the show started Ben's father was said to have a pre-fab home business but now it seems like he has a windshield repair biz so I'm confused. Who knows?

[mimionthebeach]

I'm actually reading that US Weekly issue right now. It does say Jessa is a 'midwife trainee'. The article also refers to Ben as a 'real estate apprentice'.

The article has direct quotes from Jessa and Jill, so it's possible that US is just going by what they were told.

I read that too. I just assumed they got the names mixed up. Meh, it could happen.

[TobyBelle]

I have to wonder what Ben's parents were thinking by encouraging him to take up JB's offer to live with and work for the Duggars.

When I saw that episode, it seemed like his parents were blindsided by the invitation. They were asked what they thought and they were almost speechless. I got the sense they didn't like the idea at all, but because they were being filmed, they didn't dare disagree with it. I definitely thought if it were my son and JB threw that invite out, I would say hold on, we need to talk it over with Ben first. We'll get back to you. I would resent that he's calling the shots for my kid. I don't care if he's 19 and considered an adult. I feel as his parent I'd have the obligation to warn him about what he's getting into. He probably wouldn't listen anyway because he's blinded by love.

Edited September 29, 2014 by TobyBelle

[2KllMckngBrd]

If I were his parents I would be screaming from the rooftop...run, run now, faster! There's no reason to rehash the obvious issues w/this over-populating cult like family. Love or not, I would be petrified of having my child mixed up w/this goddard stepford family. You can be conservative Christians, but the Duggars are something else all together.

Edited September 29, 2014 by 2KllMckngBrd

[trimthatfat]

Believe it or not, in certain parts of the country, there actually would be a market for what used to be called, when I was growing up, "Holiness hair." It used to be a particular swirled up variation on the 1960's beehive, but now looks like the Duggar girls' hair. That Jessa lacks the people skills wouldn't be as important as the ability to get the look right and that she comes from a modest tradition herself and would know not to embarrass her clients by certain things like magazines in the waiting room, asking certain questions, etc.

 

 Regardless of the market, Jessa would need to have people skills to interact with someone while she is providing a service. It's the nature of the industry whether your client is looking for 'holiness hair' or a cut like Cameron Diaz.

 

I suppose this is all an irrelevant discussion because Jessa isn't in cosmetology school, nor would she go to such a school.

Edited September 29, 2014 by trimthatfat

[BitterApple]

Jessa is also training to be a midwife. Can't the girls do anything else?

I'm sorry, I just choked on my bagel. Jessa is studying to be a midwife?!!! When did this turn of events happen? Just to be clear, we're talking about Jessa Duggar, correct? The one who acted annoyed and disinterested at the birth she attended with Jill and Jana? Yeah, that will work out well.

 

Regarding the ring, if Jessa did in fact get a new ring then I know for sure she reads the internet comments. Aside from her sycophants pretty much everyone thought the ring looked flimsy and cheap. I'm interested to see if she upgraded or just got the diamond reset.

 

ETA: Okay, just came from the P+H page, and that is most definitely a new ring. The center diamond is bigger and looks like a different cut than her original.

Edited September 29, 2014 by BitterApple

[PinkSprinkles]

I don't know why she'd say she is studying midwifery as a response to how she and Ben will support themselves. The program Jill was in was a lay midwife program that wouldn't generate any income. 

[GEML]

Well, I doubt she would need to go to cosmetology school. I'd be surprised it Arkansas had strict licensing requirements in those areas beyond registration and paying an annual fee.

Bigger issue, though, is that JB and Michelle never did it, and she's not a go-getter like Jill, so it will never happen.

[Barb23]

After reading the responses about why the Seewalds would let Bin live with the Duggars, all I can say is they brought it on themselves. I definitely wouldn't want my son to be a J'slave but what did they expect? They were the ones that got themselves invited to the Duggar Church of the Warehouse so Bin could lay it upon his heart to find a future spouse. And being on TV was an added perk. They could have stood up to King Boob & said No to his offer. They should have said that they wanted Bin to stay home so he could continue college & his job so he would be able to provide for a future spouse & it may take years.

[WTFFF]

I can't picture Jessa as a midwife at all.  She looked bored and ready to vomit at Jordyn's birth and Michael's birth.  She just scowled or stared dully ahead, offering no support or assistance, displaying no interest.  Jessa seems to have less than zero interest in pregnancy, babies, or other human beings. 

 

I'd rather deliver a baby on my own and hope for the best than have Jessa present.  Jill, for whatever flaws she has, seems really suited for the midwifery gig.  If not for her incessant perkiness, if I were a pregnant fundie, I can see myself hiring her in a heartbeat. 

 

Of course, I wouldn't want Jessa doing my hair, either.  I feel like Jessa isn't really suited to work with people she can't make snide comments to and about. 

[GEML]

I guess I really don't see Jessa as all that snide. I think she is in comparison to her sisters, but that's like saying that Christopher Robin is snide compared to everyone else in The Hundred Acre Woods. And when it comes down to it, Jessa is also capable of saying something personal and meaningful about someone - the way she did in the note read at the bridal shop, or when Jill, Derrick and Jim Bob called back from Nepal and Derrick asked her sisters what Jill was really like. Jessa was the ONLY sister who didn't repeat Gothard approved gobbledygook or remain silent. She talked about Jill as a lovely person. (Jinger will do this occasionally, but usually in relation to herself.)

[WTFFF]

I get those impressions from Jessa more from her social media presence than I do from her on the show (although she's pretty snarky on the show, too).  I think Ben has brought out the worst in her.

[abseedee]

New topic for us to talk about. The Pickles and Hairspray FB page has a thread about Jessa not having the original ring on but a completely different engagement ring! Wonder why?? 

I haven't found a reason why but, in the pic where Jessa is holding a heart shaped leaf you can see that it is a different ring.  From what I could see the new ring has multiple diamonds.  I'm wondering if they traded the other ring for the one Jessa has now.

Edited September 29, 2014 by abseedee

[Higgins]

I like that Jessa has some spirit. I don't think she is snide. She has a bit of a sarcastic streak. I like her.

Edited September 29, 2014 by Higgins

[Barb23]

I haven't found a reason why but, in the pic where Jessa is holding a heart shaped leaf you can see that it is a different ring.  From what I could see the new ring has multiple diamonds.  I'm wondering if they traded the other ring for the one Jessa has now.

I wonder how they will explain a new/different ring.

[cereality]

Who upgrades a ring merely weeks (or months) after a proposal?? Even if you're unhappy with it, isn't it one of those things where you say to your fiancé -- I absolutely love it, I wouldn't even WANT a different or bigger ring if we could afford it? I know many who have bought a small rock because it was all they could afford at the time with the thought that they'd upgrade it when they could -- meaning 5 yrs or 15 yrs down the road, not weeks down the road because of negative publicity or a disappointed fiancé or a product promotion from a jeweler. If I were Ben my feelings would be kind of hurt right now -- even if a jeweler came begging, I'd expect my fiancé to say -- sorry I want the ring my fiancé picked out and nothing else. I know my cousin's then fiancé said something jokingly about upgrading the ring while they were still engaged and he snapped back "go right ahead, you're your dad's responsibility right now so get whatever he'll pay for"; rude response but it hurt his feelings that his fiancé was implying that his ring wasn't good enough (but she was a mature enough person to tell him she'd never do that and drop the subject).

 

Hell if a jeweler is desperate to give you jewelry and you really want free stuff at this point in your relationship, isn't it easiest to say "you know what -- thank you for your offer for an engagement ring, but we don't want it; how about this -- how about you comp us for the wedding bands because we haven't made that purchase yet and would be happy to have your product on our hands for life and you get a nice little shot on TLC." I'm thinking more and more than Jessa is in this for all the wrong reasons -- the glamour of engagement, wedding, and free stuff will wear off and then what's she left with -- a room in a warehouse with a guy who is more crazy about her than she is about him (it seems) and within 9 months, the baby train starts . . . .

[CarolMK]

I wonder if after the wedding that Ben and Jessa decide to move down to Hot Springs and have Ben go to work with his dad in the windshield business. Jim Bob wouldn't like it but he couldn't do anything about it once Jessa's married. Looks like the upcoming episode is going to be about Ben and Jessa taking out the little kids to play at a kid's place, hopefully this time Jim Bob and Michelle won't be tagging along as chaperones.

[abseedee]

Ok now I'm confused.  Derick's brother Dan posted a pic of what he said was a wedding invitation from Jessa an Ben that included their registries.  In Touch shows a different invitation.  I wonder if it is what is on the backside of the invitation that Dan received?

 

http://www.intouchweekly.com/posts/check-it-out-see-jessa-duggar-and-ben-seewald-s-wedding-invitation-43769