Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

[janie jones]

Every White House Black Market commercial is annoying.  It's always just multiple shots of some woman posing.  They're relatively innocuous, given that no one is saying or doing anything douchey (other than possibly some of the poses), but it still annoys me.

[mmecorday]

There's a commercial for Toaster Strudel with this woman enjoying the breakfast treat so much that she's got the icing and flecks of the pastry all over her face. You know, they make things called napkins and they're relatively cheap, especially if you shop at a dollar store.

[90PercentGravity]

That ad looks like bad porn. 

[TattleTeeny]

I ate part of a silica gel packet once.  It might have been on a dare, but if it was, the dare was fueled by my obsession over what would happen if someone ate one. I never wanted to eat one until the big "DO NOT EAT" on it started taunting me.  Same with spraying canned air in my ear, I never would have thought to have done it, but the picture on the can really made me want to.  I managed to refrain from that one, although I did almost light my college apartment on fire by trying to blow out candles with one once.

 

Oh my goodness, I just laughed so loud! Despite the egg thing, I disagree: I think we could be friends! You sound like you would back up--or at least understand--my dangerous urge to put a lit cigarette into a paper shredder.

 

Yes, please, if you use a Neti Pot, only use distilled water, NEVER use tap water!  Folks have died from tap water (amoeba).

 

Oh boy. I use (purified) tap water all the time. I boil it though, which my allergist said was fine.

[yourmomiseasy]

Oh my goodness, I just laughed so loud! Despite the egg thing, I disagree: I think we could be friends! You sound like you would back up--or at least understand--my dangerous urge to put a lit cigarette into a paper shredder.

 

I feel like there's a really good chance that that would not go horribly wrong.  Maybe just do it at work while nobody's looking (and make sure you are not caught on camera, just in case).

[yourmomiseasy]

Every White House Black Market commercial is annoying.  It's always just multiple shots of some woman posing.  They're relatively innocuous, given that no one is saying or doing anything douchey (other than possibly some of the poses), but it still annoys me.

 

I liked their old ads with Coco Rocha.  The new ones are definitely not great.

[TattleTeeny]

I feel like there's a really good chance that that would not go horribly wrong.  Maybe just do it at work while nobody's looking (and make sure you are not caught on camera, just in case).

 

Well, now I know what to do should I ever decide to up and leave this place. Picture it: a cinematic explosion behind me as I do an action-hero-inspired slow and unfazed walkaway toward my newfound freedom from office life!

[ennui]

There's a new Safelite windshield commercial that annoys me. A young couple with a baby get a windshield crack, and the mom says "We can't drive this car!" and looks down at the infant in his carrier. I always think, sure you can. I had a rock chip that turned into a crack and I drove the car to work all week until I could get the windshield replaced. Trust me, lady, the car will run.

 

(In the interest of disclosure, I did use Safelite.Very pleased.)

Edited September 10, 2015 by ennui

[Ubiquitous]

I just want to shout "USE A NETI POT!".

I tried BR strips and they did not work for me, I could not sleep feeling that thing glued to my nose.

 

I've seen a version of that ad in which a little girl, presumably their daughter, is videotaping them as they're laying in bed catching flies. Why is she doing that?

 

 

 

Wal-Mart I love the Star Wars ad where the kid grows up and gives the Lego to his daughter and grandpa is sitting in the chair and the dad and daughter do the Ewok dance he did in the eighties AND James Earl Jones narrates the whole thing.

They lost me at the "Ewok dance" part. FUCKIN' Ewoks!

[Ubiquitous]

Can somebody please put a stop to those Draft Kings & Fan Duel commercials? I'm been seeing their crap for the past several weeks & I'm tired of it. I may like the NFL a lot, but seeing a bunch of losers bragging about winning lots of money playing Fantasy Football &  (on Draft Kings commercial) rubbing it in our faces really irritates me.

Dang, you beat me to it. I particularly dislike the loser wearing a backwards baseball cap rubbing his face before winning a novelty check, which is more than the vast majority will get.

Oh yeah, I noticed the "yogurt bitch" with the snack-shrinking powers is back but now, she's shrinking gigantic, possibly hallucinary cupcakes that are about a foot tall in the break room.

[Prevailing Wind]

 

There's a new Safelite windshield commercial that annoys me. A young couple with a baby get a windshield crack, and the mom says "We can't drive this car!" and looks down at the infant in his carrier. I always think, sure you can. I had a rock chip that turned into a crack and I drove the car to work all week until I could get the windshield replaced. Trust me, lady, the car will run.

Yeah, but there's that guy in Texas who got a ticket for a cracked windshield *as he was pulling into the glass repair place for this appointment* !!  Now I read the county's backing off the ticket.  Some cops are heros and other are SO freakin' over-zealous, it's embarrassing.

[meep.meep]

Texas, what a nanny state!

 

But, I digress....what I really came here to say is that if I have to listen to that guy on the Mazda commercials with his smarmy pronounciation again, I'm going to get super stabby!  Not just stabby, but super stabby!

[janie jones]

I want to punch the Mazda guy in the larynx.

[Prevailing Wind]

So now I'm humming..."Super Stabby Fragilistic..."

[Sandman87]

You know what is WORSE than that? The producers deciding to use local cheerleaders/football players/toddlers in their ad, and having them SING!

There's a Lysol commercial for some damn thing or other with a couple of girls playing patty-cake and singing. I would like to bludgeon the people who produced it.

They lost me at the "Ewok dance" part. FUCKIN' Ewoks!

I take it you don't Yub-Nub then?

Texas, what a nanny state!

LMAO!

[ari333]

OMG you guys... I cant stop laughing!

[bilgistic]

There's a new Safelite windshield commercial that annoys me. A young couple with a baby get a windshield crack, and the mom says "We can't drive this car!" and looks down at the infant in his carrier. I always think, sure you can. I had a rock chip that turned into a crack and I drove the car to work all week until I could get the windshield replaced. Trust me, lady, the car will run.

(In the interest of disclosure, I did use Safelite.Very pleased.)

Their commercial jingle makes me homicidal.

[bilgistic]

Yeah, but there's that guy in Texas who got a ticket for a cracked windshield *as he was pulling into the glass repair place for this appointment* !! Now I read the county's backing off the ticket. Some cops are heros and other are SO freakin' over-zealous, it's embarrassing.

That reminded me...Several years ago, my license plate was stolen off my car presumably at my home (then at a condo complex). I didn't notice the plate was missing until I happened to look back at my car after I had parked and gotten out to walk several feet away to a store. I called the police and filed a report while at the shopping center. As we wrapped up, the officer said to me, "It's unlawful to drive without a license tag."

Not having a ride or escort from my friendly neighborhood police officer, I promptly drove my tagless vehicle to the nearest DMV to get a new tag.

A couple days later, the police called me to tell me they found my tag on a car of a "similar color, make and model" at a nearby retirement village. ("This is a pretty common crime." A pack of wild grannies are running around lifting plates from mid-2000s-era compact cars? Oh, the humanity!)

"Did you want your tag back?" Uh, no; I already got a new one because I have to do things like be a functioning member of a surburban sprawled society, but good looking out on that crime wave!

Edited September 11, 2015 by bilgistic

[3pwood]

... I promptly drove my tagless vehicle to the nearest DMV to get a new tag.

 A couple days later, the police called me to tell me they found my tag ...  "Did you want your tag back?" Uh, no; I already got a new one ....

 

You got a new tag at the DMV immediately upon request?  You obviously don't live in California, where you can't even file an application without waiting in line for literally hours (unless you make an appointment for next week or month) & then they'll mail it to you eventually.

[bilgistic]

This was in North Carolina, sometime between five and 10 years ago. Of course, there was a long line because it was the DMV, but yeah, same-hour service. It may be different now.

[ennui]

Yeah, but there's that guy in Texas who got a ticket for a cracked windshield *as he was pulling into the glass repair place for this appointment* !!  Now I read the county's backing off the ticket.  Some cops are heros and other are SO freakin' over-zealous, it's embarrassing.

That might make a good commercial for Safelite, because "if you need Safelite to come to the zoo, we'll come to the zoo!". I lived in Texas for several years, and they take car safety a lot more seriously than other states I have lived in. California doesn't care if you car is safe, as long as it passes the smog check.  *eyeroll*

[Bort]

I lived in Texas for several years, and they take car safety a lot more seriously than other states I have lived in. California doesn't care if you car is safe, as long as it passes the smog check.  *eyeroll*

It may depend on "where" in Texas. Houston-area, my dad just this week got his vehicle passed through inspection with a giant crack on the windshield. My dad even asked the inspector about the crack and the guy flat-out told him that they only care about the emissions passing.

[ennui]

Does Texas still require annual inspections? Because in California you only need to get your car smogged every two years.

[Rick Kitchen]

Does Texas still require annual inspections? Because in California you only need to get your car smogged every two years.

 

Depends on how old your car is.  Mine is 15 years old and it has to be smogged every year.

[erikdepressant]

A couple days later, the police called me to tell me they found my tag on a car of a "similar color, make and model" at a nearby retirement village. ("This is a pretty common crime." A pack of wild grannies are running around lifting plates from mid-2000s-era compact cars? Oh, the humanity!)

Now they're harassing employees and customers at VW dealerships.

[Muffyn]

The freakin' Charmin bears are talking about skid marks.  Flames.  Flames on the side of my face.  Hot, searing flames.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9K6jCz3w98o&index=6&list=PLNC9VriI4gLMdFSYq3BiU8z8RjiysGn9a

[Sandman87]

You got a new tag at the DMV immediately upon request? You obviously don't live in California, where you can't even file an application without waiting in line for literally hours (unless you make an appointment for next week or month) & then they'll mail it to you eventually.

There's a business that runs commercials locally here (in CA) where they'll handle all the registration and tag related DMV stuff for you. Basically, you can throw money at them in order to avoid having to wait in line at the DMV.

[bilgistic]

Now they're harassing employees and customers at VW dealerships.

I walked right into that one. A tip o' the hat to you, sir.

[bilgistic]

The freakin' Charmin bears are talking about skid marks. Flames. Flames on the side of my face. Hot, searing flames.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9K6jCz3w98o&index=6&list=PLNC9VriI4gLMdFSYq3BiU8z8RjiysGn9a

Sadly, I knew what commercial you referred to before I clicked the link. For no reason, I have decided those bears are in a fraternity and the lady bear upstairs is their house mother (den mother, ahem). Why a bunch of frat brothers would be talking about not having shit in their drawers because of Charmin is beyond me, but then, WHY WOULD ANYONE.

[yourmomiseasy]

But does the Charmin get their asses so clean that they can go coh-mahn-doh?

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Nah, for that they need SAM in their pants.

[Prevailing Wind]

A few weeks ago, I took a weekend off & stayed at a hotel with a hot tub.  Naturally, me being me, I got sick. Blaming the hot tub, I googled "spa-borne illness" and I'm still reeling from what I read.  One of the articles said the *average* adult human being carries around a half-teaspoon of fecal matter in the folds of their butts.  They went on to say that if you get six people in a hot tub, that's ONE TABLESPOON of feces along with you in the tub.

 

I don't use Charmin, but I'll be damned if I have a half-teaspoon of poop still on my ass when I'm done in the loo. Who the hell, besides the bears, leaves that much crap on their tushies?

 

Also on that trip, I was walking a trail to some waterfalls and came upon a huge pile of poo.  Immediately, I thought, "Does a bear shit in the woods?" but, no...it's also a bridle path - it was just horse manure.  I could tell from the all hay remains in it. (You don't have to look too closely to see all the hay.)

[riley702]

That reminded me...Several years ago, my license plate was stolen off my car presumably at my home (then at a condo complex). I didn't notice the plate was missing until I happened to look back at my car after I had parked and gotten out to walk several feet away to a store. I called the police and filed a report while at the shopping center. As we wrapped up, the officer said to me, "It's unlawful to drive without a license tag."

Not having a ride or escort from my friendly neighborhood police officer, I promptly drove my tagless vehicle to the nearest DMV to get a new tag.

A couple days later, the police called me to tell me they found my tag on a car of a "similar color, make and model" at a nearby retirement village. ("This is a pretty common crime." A pack of wild grannies are running around lifting plates from mid-2000s-era compact cars? Oh, the humanity!)

"Did you want your tag back?" Uh, no; I already got a new one because I have to do things like be a functioning member of a surburban sprawled society, but good looking out on that crime wave!

I have a similar tale, but mine was stolen at the mall and they gave me the same spiel about it being illegal to drive without plates. "So, how am I supposed to get to the BMV?" Shrug. "Just sayin'. You can give him your case number, but he could still give you a ticket." A week after the new plate was obtained, they called to tell me it had been on a stolen car involved in a police chase after a store robbery. Great! They insisted I come downtown and pick it up even when I told them I didn't want it. And it was covered in the fingerprint crap and not even wrapped in a paper towel. I came thisclose to just slam-dunking it into his trash can, but figured I'd get in trouble for that.

Edited September 11, 2015 by riley702

[erikdepressant]

A few weeks ago, I took a weekend off & stayed at a hotel with a hot tub.  Naturally, me being me, I got sick. Blaming the hot tub, I googled "spa-borne illness" and I'm still reeling from what I read.  One of the articles said the *average* adult human being carries around a half-teaspoon of fecal matter in the folds of their butts.  They went on to say that if you get six people in a hot tub, that's ONE TABLESPOON of feces along with you in the tub.

Cholera's a beautiful thing, I know, I know.

Cholera's a beautiful thing, I know, oh yes, I know.

[Bort]

I'm going to continue the conversation in the Small Talk thread…

[TattleTeeny]

There's a confusing commercial for some drug--can't remember what it is but during the list of side effects, it says something like, "don't give to children under six years old," followed by "don't give to anyone between the ages of six and 17." So...everyone under 18 then? Why not say it that way?

[bilgistic]

A few weeks ago, I took a weekend off & stayed at a hotel with a hot tub.  Naturally, me being me, I got sick. Blaming the hot tub, I googled "spa-borne illness" and I'm still reeling from what I read.  One of the articles said the *average* adult human being carries around a half-teaspoon of fecal matter in the folds of their butts.  They went on to say that if you get six people in a hot tub, that's ONE TABLESPOON of feces along with you in the tub.

 

I don't use Charmin, but I'll be damned if I have a half-teaspoon of poop still on my ass when I'm done in the loo. Who the hell, besides the bears, leaves that much crap on their tushies?

 

Also on that trip, I was walking a trail to some waterfalls and came upon a huge pile of poo.  Immediately, I thought, "Does a bear shit in the woods?" but, no...it's also a bridle path - it was just horse manure.  I could tell from the all hay remains in it. (You don't have to look too closely to see all the hay.)

I am cracking up at work! My ex-boyfriend saw on TV that it was the same amount as a "quarter peanut"; thanks for reminding me. And now I'm thinking of all the times I got in the hot tub on vacation in July.

[frenchtoast]

Hey folks, can we follow the lead and have the conversation that's not about commercials and head over to the Small Talk area? Thanks!

[DeLurker]

The Cottonelle Bitch of Annoyance is so potent that even seeing a print ad of her makes me stabby.

[Shriekingeel]

Just sayin, Jim Perdue, the word "antibiotics" has five syllables. Five. "Anabotics" is not a word.

Edited September 11, 2015 by Shriekingeel

[SoSueMe]

I'm really, really sorry (especially if it's been mentioned already) but the Charmin bears have reached a new low. The latest selling point? You can get 2, count 'em, 2 days wear out of your undies by using Charmin. Oh joy.

[ennui]

Toilet paper commercials are reaching, between the skid marks and going commando. However, the one that puzzles me is Scott Tissue, and their ad about all the empty toilet paper cardboard rolls building a skyscraper. So, now it's tube-free. Aren't those roll forms biodegradable?

[TattleTeeny]

I'm really, really sorry (especially if it's been mentioned already) but the Charmin bears have reached a new low. The latest selling point? You can get 2, count 'em, 2 days wear out of your undies by using Charmin. Oh joy.

Those jerks are always naked in the commercials so what the hell do they know about clothes anyway?

 

I hate the Vonage commercial that says, "What ever happened to the home phone, the one that kept everyone connected?" Well, for one thing, you know what happened: cell phones. But even dumber is that the "home phone," no matter how nostalgic Vonage wants it to seem, did not connect "everybody" because only one person could use it at a time! Same commercial says that the service includes a telemarketer blocker so "you can spend time with people you want to, not people you don't." You do not have to "spend time" with the telemarketer! Vonage's nonissues are akin to the black-and-white struggles in infomercials.

Edited September 12, 2015 by TattleTeeny

[DrSpaceman73]

I hate the Chevy commercials. Did a 3rd grader come up with these? The 'who won this award. Would you believe Chevy' type ads? You paid some company to come up with that. Then all the "Oh, this is a Chevy" shocked results.

Every 10 minutes during football games. This is quickly going to be worse than that "Zoom, zoom" little creepy kid.

[Jamoche]

Toilet paper commercials are reaching, between the skid marks and going commando. However, the one that puzzles me is Scott Tissue, and their ad about all the empty toilet paper cardboard rolls building a skyscraper. So, now it's tube-free. Aren't those roll forms biodegradable?

Yep, but I'd bet a lot of people just don't think about that. When I was a kid it was only the really cheap toilet paper that didn't have a center roll, and that stuff does not spin around the holder.

[bilgistic]

How lazy and entitled are people that they can't recycle toilet paper tubes? This isn't the 1960s. Take some responsibility for your planet.

[janie jones]

I feel like the no-tube toilet paper would be good for camping, or traveling to places where you can't rely on there being toilet paper in public bathrooms.  But for home, it's kind of pointless, since you can recycle the tube.  But I guess having no waste is better than having waste you can recycle.

[bilgistic]

My complaint is lodged at the people who have already thrown out enough toilet paper tubes to build the Empire State Building, or whatever it was. Going forward, let's all please recycle and not buy Scott because they cut down trees to make TP instead of using recycled paper. Yes, I know they have a recycled line, but by and large, their products are made from "virgin" trees, so they can shut right up, anyway. (::tap-dances off stage left::)

[mansonlamps]

I just saw a commercial for some flu medicine that pissed me off, not even sure why though. It was for a flu medicine for people over 60 and showed a bunch of couples in their 60's dancing and having a great time because, you know, they didn't have the flu. Okay, great so far. Problem? They are shown energetically dancing to 40's swing music. Hello morons making commercials for people in their sixties..some of them may have been BORN in the late forties, but they didn't grow up with big band music, this was the Woodstock generation. Show them rocking to Dylan or the Stones or something remotely nostalgic to the people you are targeting with your ad!

Not sure why it pisses me off, is it pure laziness on the part of the commercial developers, is it arrogance, condescension, or do they just not even give a fuck about getting it right for this age group? Maybe they don't want to offend young people who listen to Zeppelin by acknowledging that their grandparents were the ones who originally made them famous. Who knows, it just annoyed the crap out of me.

[backformore]

I just saw a commercial for some flu medicine that pissed me off, not even sure why though. It was for a flu medicine for people over 60 and showed a bunch of couples in their 60's dancing and having a great time because, you know, they didn't have the flu. Okay, great so far. Problem? They are shown energetically dancing to 40's swing music. Hello morons making commercials for people in their sixties..some of them may have been BORN in the late forties, but they didn't grow up with big band music, this was the Woodstock generation. Show them rocking to Dylan or the Stones or something remotely nostalgic to the people you are targeting with your ad!

Not sure why it pisses me off, is it pure laziness on the part of the commercial developers, is it arrogance, condescension, or do they just not even give a fuck about getting it right for this age group? Maybe they don't want to offend young people who listen to Zeppelin by acknowledging that their grandparents were the ones who originally made them famous. Who knows, it just annoyed the crap out of me.

No kidding!  It's not the first time I've seen that, either.    It seems like someone is trying to convince us Beatles/Stones etc fans that now that we're older, we need some Lawrence Welk in our lives.