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S05.E22: Check-Up With Dr. Drew - Part Two


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Also thank you for making Dr. Drew look like an idiot by encouraging you to be positive about a situation that isn't positive. Yes, we can all agree that Amber has highlights.

 

Oh man, I forgot about that. That was so awesome. Drew is all, "Come on Gary, say something nice about Amber." Gary - "She's fun to hang out with and she has highlights". Drew - "Okay, so you like her highlights". "I didn't say I LIKED them". 

 

BURN!

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Lol! It went from rope burns to ear to ear bruising and blood. "It was so bad....uhh...dude. Like it was , oh man. Like the marks on my neck. It was...just blood and so baaaad" we get it. It was bad. That's not a direct quote but that about sums it up.

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Tyler really became the SNL character who whatever happened to you happened to them ten fold. Anytime Panda said something, Tyler would go "yeah it was so bad, the marks on my neck".

 

I want to know how it got that bad and he survived. It sounds like he's saying he tried to hang himself, but no one else knew about it until he told them. So that leads me to believe he "saved" himself, stopped it, etc. If so, how it it possible that his neck was that fucked up? I mean, I'm no suicide expert, but what exactly did he do???

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Is Maci insane? Or just the dumbest person on the show/in life? Wasn't this filmed the same weekend she got engaged? And the story is that right after she got engaged she found out she was 21 weeks pregnant. How often do you get the depo shot? Because she's been pregnant since Labor Day so I don't understand.

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Is Maci insane? Or just the dumbest person on the show/in life? Wasn't this filmed the same weekend she got engaged? And the story is that right after she got engaged she found out she was 21 weeks pregnant. How often do you get the depo shot? Because she's been pregnant since Labor Day so I don't understand.

Depo Provera injections are every 3 months.
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(edited)

And they would obviously give you a pregnancy test before giving you an injection, right?

And the shot protects you for three months at a time?

Edited by poopchute
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(edited)

Yes! I believe SNL referred to those people as "one-uppers" and that indeed describes Tyler perfectly. There was a similar skit from Monty Python where four guys were talking about how poor they were growing up and it becomes this huge competition, so it starts out like "When I was young my 5 brothers and I shared one bedroom" and by the time it ends someone is saying he grew up in a brown paper bag in a septic tank.

 

http://www.montypython.net/scripts/4york.php

Edited by The Mighty Peanut
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(edited)

Tyler's eyes were so shifty during that suicide story, like he was trying to remember which details he'd used before. When Dr. Drew asked about it he seemed like he was looking all over the room before settling on uh I just... I uh... went in the backyard (yeah that's it!) and tried to hang myself. Whatever Tyler.

 

To me anyway Cate and Tyler, Cate especially, seemed extremely immature. They always do but seeing them next to the others it really stood out. Giggle Giggle we finish each others' sentences and talk over each other aren't we cute?  At one point I was yelling at the TV "shut up and let him talk Cate!" (you know it's bad if I want to be able to hear TYLER talk). Pretty much all of the Moms seem somewhat immature, but they're still young so I understand it. If I didn't know better and if I were just listening to them all talk, I'd probably put Tyler and Cate at maybe Freshmen year of high school age.

 

Couldn't believe how much attention they gave to Butch or the way he was just lapping it all up. He reminded me so much of Tyler again in that Skype call.

 

Gary kinda pissed me off with his comment about Amber's highlights, only because it seemed like it was possible she might take it as flirtatious and we know he screws with her head that way all the time. But otherwise loved Gary and Kristina's part, especially when Gary confronted Matt about seeing his OWN kids. I 'bout spewed water out of my nose when big tough Dr. Drew went to sit in between them just in case. Oh please, what was he going to do?

 

I thought the last part was pretty funny when he asked if the Moms all get along now etc. Farrah just staring straight ahead while her face went into super-bitch mode - I knew we were about to get the no negativity, moving forward BS. Meanwhile you had Cate looking the other direction, and everyone looking uncomfortable.

 

Then the birth control discussion where Maci sat there and lied. I wonder if the other Moms could tell she was pregnant? I'm assuming they spend a fair amount of time together and maybe even share hotel rooms and such.

 

I guess it was about what I expected from one of these shows. I really, really wish they'd get a better host or start making Dr. Drew watch the show though.


And they would obviously give you a pregnancy test before giving you an injection, right?

And the shot protects you for three months at a time?

 

Yep. Her story reported in a tabloid somewhere was that she went in to get her birth control renewed (so I assume by that she meant her Depo shot) and found out she was pregnant.

Edited by NikSac
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So she basically never went back on it after she had Jayde. Unless I guess she got one shot in June and then didn't go back until January. But I doubt she ran right out to get a shot immediately after giving birth if she's the kind of person who would then go 5 more months without getting another shot. So I guess when she says "I'm on the depo shot" she meant that is the birth control she used a year and a half ago before she got pregnant with Jayde. Not really sure how that's an answer to Dr. Drew's question which was what are you using for birth control NOW.

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(edited)

Yep. Her story reported in a tabloid somewhere was that she went in to get her birth control renewed (so I assume by that she meant her Depo shot) and found out she was pregnant.

 

No, she claimed in US Weekly that she was getting her "prescription refilled" when she learned she was pregnant. You don't get a prescription for it, you get a shot. Three weeks before the claimed appointment, she was sitting on the couch there answering the "what birth control do you use question" with "Depo."  So why didn't the interview say "I went in for my quarterly Depo shot and learned I was pregnant."

 

It's clear what we have here is a case of pantalones en el fuego.

Edited by SnarkKitty
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(edited)

I was on Depo Provera about 10 years ago. I would have to take the written prescription to the pharmacy, wait for them to process the prescription and then bring the vial back to my gyno for the injection -- so it's possible that Maci had to do something similar. Some offices don't keep in on hand because lots expire quicker than the office would use, causing the practice to lose money.

Edited by CofCinci
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Lol! It went from rope burns to ear to ear bruising and blood. "It was so bad....uhh...dude. Like it was , oh man. Like the marks on my neck. It was...just blood and so baaaad" we get it. It was bad. That's not a direct quote but that about sums it up.

Don't forget, he was a cutter as well.

Tyler you used to cut yourself as well didn't you?

Uhhh...Yeah!! Yeah that too!. Yuppers.

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But if she was getting the shot when she was 21 weeks pregnant and it only lasts 3 months, then she would've gotten the shot when she was 3 months pregnant.

 

Or she's just full of shit.  That's far more likely.  3 "accidents" before the age of 25.  That's special.

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I was on Depo Provera about 10 years ago. I would have to take the written prescription to the pharmacy, wait for them to process the prescription and then bring the vial back to my gyno for the injection -- so it's possible that Maci had to do something similar. Some offices don't keep in on hand because lots expire quicker than the office would use, causing the practice to lose money.

But even if this is the case, she couldn't have possibly been on the shot when Dr Drew asked because she was 21 weeks pregnant when he asked. So when was the last time she got the shot? She had a baby on May 29th and got pregnant by the 2nd week of September. I'm not seeing where there was time in there to get a shot and she certainly wasn't getting them after September because she was pregnant then. So I'm confused as to how in January she's saying she was on the shot.

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I call horseshit on Tyler's suicide "story." He froze when Drew asked him 'how' and stumbled to and was lost for a minute there in answering the question. He said something like he put his neck in the rope, jumped, and thought his neck would break right away but when it didn't, he decided "this isn't for me" and with no feet on the ground, was able to pull off the rope? Um, okay. I just can't with these people getting away with such outlandish tales and not being called out on it.

 

Amber deserves whatever she gets from Matt. 

 

Farrah is a drama queen that pulls the "I was abused" card and the ugly cry face on demand.

 

Maci's segments are a waste now. Nothing to see there. Just zzzz's.

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Ok. Haven't read through the posts yet, but Jesus Mother'fuckin Christ Y'all. Tyler and Dr. Screw are talking about his suicide attempt, and I quote:

 

Dr. Screw: "So that was your rock bottom (Tyler covering his rope marks with makeup)

Tyler: "Yeah, Yeah..."

Dr. Screw: "That's Heavy. COMING UP NEXT, WE TALK TO BUTCH..."

 

Just jesus crap. I know we've all been shitting on T's suicide attempt, but we all also know Dr. Dickhead doesn't actually watch the show. If I would have heard that out of the blue, I wouldn't really worried that much about the segway. Maybe I would have shown sympathy? Idk. 


I call horseshit on Tyler's suicide "story." He froze when Drew asked him 'how' and stumbled to and was lost for a minute there in answering the question. He said something like he put his neck in the rope, jumped, and thought his neck would break right away but when it didn't, he decided "this isn't for me" and with no feet on the ground, was able to pull off the rope? Um, okay. I just can't with these people getting away with such outlandish tales and not being called out on it.

 

Amber deserves whatever she gets from Matt. 

 

Farrah is a drama queen that pulls the "I was abused" card and the ugly cry face on demand.

 

Maci's segments are a waste now. Nothing to see there. Just zzzz's.

When I was 12 I took almost a bottle of sleeping pills and as I fell asleep, the last thought I had was "I shouldn't have done this". Obvs I survived. I would have had the same response to the "Doctor". We are simply different things when we're preteens. 

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I mean last week was so boring and this week while we did not learn anything worth noting was damn hilarious. Like Gary is quite possibly one of the best things to come out of this franchise. I'm kind of trying to find a way to pitch some sort of spin off where Gary, Jen and Larry, and Kristina just do commentary on episodes of this show.

For special guest stars we can throw in some teen mom 2 stars like Corey and Miranda and Corey's dad.

As far as why Catelyn and Maci hate Farrah. I think someone hi on the nail on the head with Tyler havng watched the video and cate losing her mind over that. I think Maci doesn't like Farrah because she still is mad that MTV realized they needed Farrah because the season last year was boring. Not that Farrah made it better at all but I think Maci took it was personally because I think she feels she's built this franchise or something. Also the fact that she tried to take a stand and quit and no one really cared. I think that eats away at her.

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I mean last week was so boring and this week while we did not learn anything worth noting was damn hilarious. Like Gary is quite possibly one of the best things to come out of this franchise. I'm kind of trying to find a way to pitch some sort of spin off where Gary, Jen and Larry, and Kristina just do commentary on episodes of this show.

For special guest stars we can throw in some teen mom 2 stars like Corey and Miranda and Corey's dad.

As far as why Catelyn and Maci hate Farrah. I think someone hi on the nail on the head with Tyler havng watched the video and cate losing her mind over that. I think Maci doesn't like Farrah because she still is mad that MTV realized they needed Farrah because the season last year was boring. Not that Farrah made it better at all but I think Maci took it was personally because I think she feels she's built this franchise or something. Also the fact that she tried to take a stand and quit and no one really cared. I think that eats away at her.

They most likely hate Farrah because she may have been the only one to negotiate for higher pay. Farrah is able to walk away. Her porn and rubber vagina sales can pay the bills right now; whereas, folks like Maci and Amber have to take whatever is offered. Tyler and Catelynn have a little income coming in from Bethany Baby Stealing Inc., but not enough to support all their loser kin so they also might not have been in a position to negotiate either.
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Don't forget, he was a cutter as well.

Tyler you used to cut yourself as well didn't you?

Uhhh...Yeah!! Yeah that too!. Yuppers.

LMAO, yes! I spewed coffee all over! Stupid Tyler...I swear he Is just not believable, I hate to think he's using something so serious as suicide to get publicity or whatever he's going after. I just don't sense he's being truthful about this at all. That would make him a A-hole of epic proportions.

Ip

Tyler Caitlynn Amber and Maci are are liars.

Yes, Lying liars who lie.

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LMAO, yes! I spewed coffee all over! Stupid Tyler...I swear he Is just not believable, I hate to think he's using something so serious as suicide to get publicity or whatever he's going after. I just don't sense he's being truthful about this at all. That would make him a A-hole of epic proportions.

Ip

Yes, Lying liars who lie.

I know that's where I have a hard time with him too. If the story or stories are true I feel awful but I don't believe him. It looks way too much like he's searching for the story when he tells it.

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I know that's where I have a hard time with him too. If the story or stories are true I feel awful but I don't believe him. It looks way too much like he's searching for the story when he tells it.

He reminded me of Jon Lovitz on SNL as the pathological liar..."Suicide? Yeah, yeah...cut myself! Yeah, yeah that's the ticket...I uhhhhh hung myself, and I uhhhh cut..."

Ugh! He's a freaking tool.

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I just watched this mess and I'm wondering if I'm the only one that thought that Amber seemed drunk during the show. She was slurring some of her words and half of what she was saying didn't even make any sense (I guess that's normal for her though.)

She's so dumb I actually hope they get married and he takes her for everything she has, spider lashes and all. She looks like a damn fool and the more she defends Matt the dumber she looks. I hope he takes her beloved couch too and leaves her to lay on the urine soaked carpet with her 20 pets.

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(edited)

I sure hope BrandonandTheresa are watching this show with a pen and paper handy, so they can flesh out Carly's full medical history, what with Tyler's recent invention-- er, recollection of clinical depression, attempted suicide, cutting, and theater makeup application. <yawn> We need to get Gary the Hairy Fairy: PI on the case, stat, to examine these allegations and search the public records for any documentation of such incidents. And did I hear Tyler insisting that he just "didn't pay attention" when Carly called him her dad at the wedding?! Why does Dr. Panda keep on encouraging this delusional fuckery? Where is the untherapist in all of this? Does the adoption counselor lady from Bethany Baby Stealing Inc. see this as reasonable separation?

These people are off the rails unstable, each and every one.

Also, April and her smug, shit-eating methface smirk can exit stage left A.NY.TIME. The self congratulatory thought bubbles floating over her addled brain make me furious. You're not better than anyone, sweetheart, and you have almost nothing to be proud of here. Good grief. What a mess.

Edited by MollyZee
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Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't Dr. Derp speak to all of the girls alone before bringing their insignificant others/family out except Catelynn? Why TF does Tyler get special treatment? FFS. 

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(edited)

I just watched this mess and I'm wondering if I'm the only one that thought that Amber seemed drunk during the show. She was slurring some of her words and half of what she was saying didn't even make any sense (I guess that's normal for her though.)

She's so dumb I actually hope they get married and he takes her for everything she has, spider lashes and all. She looks like a damn fool and the more she defends Matt the dumber she looks. I hope he takes her beloved couch too and leaves her to lay on the urine soaked carpet with her 20 pets.

I definitely thought something seemed off with her, but I also think she jumps into this automatically defensive mode kind of like Farrah. Neither one of them were making any sense a few times.

ETA which doesn't mean she wasn't drunk or high, I just wonder if like Farrah she gets into that rage and stops making sense.

Edited by NikSac
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I thought Amber looked like she was gaining weight again. Matt's body language was so weird on the reunion, I kept waiting for him to lay completely down on the couch, such a freak! Plus I loved Dr. Drew not agreeing with Amber! "Whatever Dr.Drew" is the best she could come up with, Amber hasn't changed at all! Let's just pray a porn isn't in their future!

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(edited)

I thought Amber looked like she was gaining weight again. Matt's body language was so weird on the reunion, I kept waiting for him to lay completely down on the couch, such a freak! Plus I loved Dr. Drew not agreeing with Amber! "Whatever Dr.Drew" is the best she could come up with, Amber hasn't changed at all! Let's just pray a porn isn't in their future!

Matt's body language on the couch I think stems from him showing the audience (the world watching) that he isn't scared or upset about all the negative stuff that is being said about him.

Kind of like "whatever you idiots. You don't scare me. My feelings aren't hurt. Can't you tell by the way I'm sooooo chilled and comfortable on this couch?"

Another thing that had me scratching my head was at the way Amber and Matt were. She was almost like mad at the beginning of the episode and barely looked at Matt except when she was defending the creepy dudes honor from Gary the hairy fairy.

I think she honestly doesn't want to be with Matt anymore and you can see it in their body language together.

I'm thinking she wants to dump him once everything is quieting down about Matts drama filled past so that Amber can say she dumped him on HER OWN TERMS and not because of anything Gary told her or the viewers/ baby mamas.

She seems embarrassed and angry about what's happening but is too embarrassed (stubborn) to admit when everyone, including Jenelle, were right about this creepy dude.

Once everything quiets down I foresee Amber dumping Matt over some other reason that tabloids didn't bring up.

Edited by Calm81
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Oh my God... Leah is a very lively and attractive child.  That tattoo looks nothing like her.  Did Amber go to Ink Mater on portrait day (notorious for being a disaster)?

 

The child in the tattoo looks disturbed and frightened, though that is probably how Leah does look around Amber.

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(edited)

Cate and Tyler need to get their lying asses off of television and stop spewing their lives over social media. Tyler needs to step away from the unconformed world he has set up and get a job to support his wife and baby. Catelynn needs to step up and start doing her job of being a SAHM without the benefit of an MTV check and learn to survive without all the perks that MTV has brought forth. Go away. Tyler can resume his fake cutting and fake suicide story-telling at his 9-5 job and see who believes his BS or frankly, who gives a damn. I hope this bubble that these two have been encased in, bursts and blows their fucking lazy asses far, far away, never to be seen or heard from again. They can take the rest of these damn liars with them.

Amber and Matt - never do you see these two looking happy. On the rare occasion they share a kiss. (ewww) it comes off forced.

MTV needs to change the show's title to The Liar's Club.

Edited by GreatKazu
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Ty and Cate I wish people would leave them alone, they have been through hell since they were little kids.

 

Yes, they have. And I think a lot of people gave them a pass for a long time. But, unfortunately, their story is not unique. Plenty of people come from a similar background, rise above it, and make something of themselves. Cate and Tyler are disappointing because they seem content to sit around on social media all day and barely parent their second chance baby. 

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I don't know, I think [Catelynn] does the same thing. There were several times last night when Drew was focusing on Butch or Tyler or even Kim, and she had to burst in with her two cents, explain how they feel, etc. 

 

Maybe I just haven't been paying attention, but this was the first time I've noticed just how frequently she interrupts.  Not only that, she interrupts and just keeps on going if the person she interrupts doesn't stop talking.  And she does it in a way that seems especially annoying, but I can't put my finger on why that's so.

 

The thing about Tyler's suicide story is his mom was right there on the show.  The one who helped him disguise the rope marks with makeup. I would have paid big bucks for even a seemingly softball question thrown at her (with Sad-Panda face), like "What was going through your head as you helped your son use makeup to cover the rope marks from his attempted suicide?"  I expect that if Tyler's story is b.s. that she'd lie for him, but I'd at least like to watch her do it. 

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He probably got the marks from autoerotic asphyxiation.

You my friend, are a bright damn genius! That makes perfect sense. No way he ever got off to thinking about Catelynn, so the man has to get his jollies somehow.

This was probably just the one time he was cutting hooky and mom came home before he could finish.

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I hope Matt and Amber aren't planning on a porno. Amber's tattoo of her daughter's face is too disturbing for that. Poor Boo Boo.

1fLlYte.jpg

Wait is this for real? As is Leah isn't going to be scarred enough with Gary and Amber as parents...

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Just watched. Is Amber really sitting on that stage saying what is and what isn't the audiences business? Bitch, this is your job! The only career you have is to sit on your fucking couch and talk about your life. She should want to share more dirt so she has something interesting to talk about before the show is cancelled and she's left with no job, no education and no skills. I really disliked the way she talked to Gary and Dr. Drew when she was defending Matt.

Thank you Gary for saying what's real! Matt, how are your abandoned kids in the past? Did you catch up your child support? Did you establish a relationship with your kids? So, no, this is all current. How can anyone, and a parent at that, be interested in someone who so casually severs blood and relationship ties? And you think he is going to commit to you and your child? Even if he was a drug addict then, he isn't one NOW. What's stopping him from making things right (at least financially) with his kids and exes? He is such a greasy, slimy con and Amber deserves everything she's about to get with him because she's been adequately warned.

Why is Catelynn so salty towards Farrah? She really thought Amber and Maci were going to back her attitude up. When they didn't and Farrah (for the first time in her life) sounded like a rational person, Catelynn had to eat crow and apologize.

Even though Catelynn annoys me, she is the only one that hasn't gotten snippy with the producers about what she does and doesn't want to film. If I was MTV, I'd call these girls bluffs when they get all snotty. Oh you don't want to film? Ok, let us take our cameras and checks and get out of here. I doubt Farrah or Amber would be acting like divas anymore.

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 I think Matt said something about the report Gary found, that it was a mistake and 2 of the kids weren't his and if you look it up now it will only say 5 kids. Wonder how true that is. Matt grosses me out every time I see him.

It's not even a little bit true, lol. The records are readily available on the Indiana courts website and he still has five cases from five different women with two of them having two children listed. I don't know when in January the reunion was filmed, but the cases were dismissed in December because they couldn't serve him in October since he and Amber had moved. A subpoena was issued on 1/21 though, he was served on 2/3, his attorney filed an appearance (notice to all parties that she's representing him) on 3/1 and the hearing will be on 3/22. That's what it says for every case against him and there is no mention of any children being dropped from the support orders.  

 

So she basically never went back on it after she had Jayde. Unless I guess she got one shot in June and then didn't go back until January. But I doubt she ran right out to get a shot immediately after giving birth if she's the kind of person who would then go 5 more months without getting another shot. So I guess when she says "I'm on the depo shot" she meant that is the birth control she used a year and a half ago before she got pregnant with Jayde. Not really sure how that's an answer to Dr. Drew's question which was what are you using for birth control NOW.

 

Pretty much. I will note though, that the current recommendation is to wait at least 6 weeks after giving birth before getting Depo again, especially if you're breastfeeding. The reasoning is that the progesterone is excreted in breast milk and they'd like babies to have a more mature system before being exposed even though, technically, studies say there's no risk. The shot also causes breakthrough bleeding in some women and can hinder your six week checkup. If she gave birth May 29, was 6 weeks postpartum mid-July and was 6 months pregnant in mid-February, she got pregnant in late July and hasn't even been in the vicinity of a Depo shot since 2014.

 

ETA because I thought I'd watched all of this but apparently I hadn't: Amber is so fucking embarrassing. At one point Gary says "I want to know that if he's going to be there, he's there and that what he says is real." In true ME ME ME fashion, Amber's all "Why's everyone thinking that we're breaking up? We're getting married so let's stop acting like this relationship is out the door." Amber, no one gives a shit about your relationship and no one is deluded enough to think that if it did end, you were the one who did the leaving. It's sad that in an instance where Gary is showing concern for their child, Amber's first thought is about other people doubting her romantic relationship.

Edited by luvly
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Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't Dr. Derp speak to all of the girls alone before bringing their insignificant others/family out except Catelynn? Why TF does Tyler get special treatment? FFS.

Maybe because Ty is like one of the girls...with his sassy strutting wiggly walk and all.

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Finally able to watch the second part. Normally when I watch I have it on in the background while I'm cooking or whatever. They are just sitting like lumps so I don't miss anything. This time I actualy cast my gaze at the screen and:

 

WHO DOES MACI THINK SHE'S FOOLING???

 

Girl was blatantly pregnant.  

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I had to laugh when Butch used most of his segment as a match.com ad. And like the rest of them, he is delusional in still thinking Carly is "family."

Did Drew actually ask the audience to give Butch a "slow clap" and does he know what that means?

<snip>

I noticed that Catelynn isn't quite as sweet in person as she is in the edited version of the show. It came out when she had to be bleeped out while talking to Farrah.

 

I meant to comment before about the "slow clap."  No, I don't think he knows what it means, but I will say I've heard multiple people use it the way he did recently. It's like the meaning has morphed over time or something.

 

Re: Catelynn, not only that but as others (myself included I think) have noted, she wouldn't freaking SHUT UP and let other people talk. She was constantly talking over people and interrupting them. She wasn't quite as bad as Farrah about doing that, but close.

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

 

Amber Thinks Two Of Matt's Kids Are A Tech Glitch On The Teen Mom Reunion

Meanwhile, everyone has opinions on Catelynn's depression except Catelynn.

 

Good summary! I do have one minor correction for you - on this part:

 

Catelynn and Farrah both have IUDs, Amber is on Depo, and Maci is mysteriously silent because we all now know she was already knocked up by that point.

 

Maci wasn't silent. She very clearly said Depo.  I'd have to watch again but I think she even said it a couple of times.

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I still laugh every time I randomly think of the exchange with Matt and Gary "I'm doing this because I adore Leah" "but you don't adore your kids?" Amazing. Just... I mean.. I have nothing to say.

Maci is probably having trouble with keeping her lies straight at this point.

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