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S04.E02: New Blood


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Lisa brings new blood into the SUR mix, but newbie Lala soon discovers there's no such thing as a secret at the restaurant. Meanwhile, rumors spread about James and Kristen, and Jax imports a new girlfriend from Kentucky.

  • Love 1
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Return of the Chunky sweater!!!1!1!1!1!11!!!!!

Moar Fireballllllllllllll!!!!!!

Grey Couch of Sad Kristen is Sad!

Kristen is... Kristen but I sorta kinda admire that she just got up and left DJ Muppet Baby at that table. Then he had to "pay the check." Har har.

And I also hope that Kristen gets together and opens a detective agency with Meghan from RHOC. They could specialize in finding out The Truth about Lying Boyfriends.

Scheana looks great without the eye makeup. I'm just surprised she didn't have it on for the big dramatic crying scene.

  • Love 13
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That Lala girl is showing how green she is about reality TV by admitting she lied to Lisa about her "modeling" job on camera, which Lisa will obviously see and realize she lied. It's early but I don't see her lasting more than a season, like Vail. Love the addition of Faith though.

What is that Kentucky girl doing with Jax? She's either trying to break into acting or she's in desperate need of some money (or both).

Krazy Kristen is as krazy as ever I see. How ironic that she's drinking (or more like guzzling) a glass of wine while grilling James about his drinking. LOL

Ok I actually like Scheana for the most part but this episode was too Scheana-heavy for my liking. Her voice just grates after awhile.

Tom humping Ariana on the couch in the furniture store- yuck. I hope they bought it. I thought it was funny when Ariana yelled "There's people!" And Ariana comparing Jax and Kristen to dogs- come on, that is an insult to dogs! Ha

Katie's hair looks great this season, so much better than that orange mess she had a couple seasons ago. And I loved seeing Gordo again, Schwartz doing the little dance with him was adorable!

  • Love 4
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I know that this "reality show" is fake and all, but why did Jax's girlfriend go to a job interview wearing her nightgown? In what real-life situation would she ever get hired? Unless it was an interview to be a hooker.

  • Love 17
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I know that this "reality show" is fake and all, but why did Jax's girlfriend go to a job interview wearing her nightgown? In what real-life situation would she ever get hired? Unless it was an interview to be a hooker.

I thought the same thing until I remembered what she was wearing was no shorter than those hideous SUR dresses the waitresses wear.

  • Love 2
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What a difference a season makes. Last season I though James was a somewhat naive, lovestruck, busboy.

Now I think he's an alcoholic psychopath. The way he whispered "I love you" in Kristin's ear after looking her in the eyes and telling her boldface lies was truly disturbing.

Edited by Silo
  • Love 14
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James is gross.

Damn this show for making me feel even the least bit bad for Kristen. He was so cold and manipulative when he sat there lying to her face and how he loved her. What a terrible human.

Jax has a stinky foot fetish. Things I never needed to know.

Lala is a semi pro party girl. It worked pretty good for Sonja Morgan before she blew through her money.

  • Love 7
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I know that this "reality show" is fake and all, but why did Jax's girlfriend go to a job interview wearing her nightgown? In what real-life situation would she ever get hired? Unless it was an interview to be a hooker.

Lisa Vanderbucks is such a great businesswoman! She never hires people who her employees are dating, except she does.

 

I thought the same thing until I remembered what she was wearing was no shorter than those hideous SUR dresses the waitresses wear.

Yeah, that thought occurred to me as well, but then I remembered LaLa goes to Italy to give Lewinskis (shhh! don't let Lisa know!). Was Katie in her interview segments wearing LaLa's dress?

 

I couldn't help  but notice them setting up the exposition for Shay's intervention.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/y5vHhpaP9H8

  • Love 1
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James seemed REALLY excited about lying to Kristin in his talking heads. I don't know whether it's because they've had an epic breakup (because any breakup with Kristin is epic) by the time it was filmed so he was giddily like "Screw this bitch" or because he was told he could be a cast member if he could bring this season's cheating storyline so he's just all "OMG, you guys, I totally nailed the cheating storyline via that girl's vagina!" But either way, buckle up, Detective Krazy Kristin has a new cheating scandal to investigate! Why would James give her his email password and/or who checks their partner's email? Regardless, Uber girl is this season's Vegas girl or Miami girl.

Jax's girlfriend shows up for a job interview in lingerie and no resume. Then again, it seemed like plan of getting a job there was impromptu--wait a minute, to be on the show, you should work here (unless working gives you panic attacks like Schwartz). But why was Scheana saying that Lisa wouldn't hire Shea? I thought he was a music producer or something? Or maybe like matcing, that's still a per gig job, and it's not like he's on the payroll of a record company. (Everything I know about the music business I learned from Empire, and they seem to bring in different people to work on songs.)

So Lala's modeling gigs is being a high-end escort...or possibly a sugar baby...but she seemed hired for the trip rather than a sugar daddy situation, and her profile picture seemed like an effective advertisement to secure more "modeling jobs." She didn't try too hard to cover it up, though--ok, guys, you got me! Don't tell Lisa. Sure... But, Lala, you need to be a better liar than that to cut it on this show. People commit to their lies for YEARS--or at least a 10-episode story arc. She couldn't hold her lie through one scene. Tsk-tsk.

Edited by JenE4
  • Love 11
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Just noticed in the intro James is tossing a record into the air! This is seriously the only show I don't FF the opening song. Love it. 

 

I'm so confused about the Uber situation with James and Jenna. I thought he and Kristen lived together. So where was she when he brought another girl back from 3-6. Did it not say, "James and Kristen's apartment" during that scene last episode? Was she asleep in another room? Was she staying somewhere else? I need details, people! 

 

But damn, do NOT piss of Kristen. That bitch is scary has hell. She gets this super constipated face and her eyes radiate pure evil. Her silent seething is ten times worse than when she's screaming at you in the alley. And then James is kissing all over her and trying to make it better. Lying to her, but admitting the truth on air???? There's an episode of Snapped somewhere in their future. 

 

I did love when Schwartz said it was good thing James was being all shady, so Kristen's hacking skills didn't go to waste. Zing! 

 

 

Jax is just so so gross. He WOULD have a stinky feet fetish. Maybe he likes his OWN stinky feet....and never bathes....and that's why there's a perpetual oil slick on his face. How much is he paying Brittany? She is really cute and seems nice. So she either wants to be on TV very badly or is a total mental case, as we will find out later. Seriously. Because no normal, sane girl would want to spend 5 minutes with Jax and his chunky sweater. 

 

 

So Lala is clearly only a model in her own mind, on Instagram, as are about 5 million girls worldwide. But Katie was killing me with her reasoning for why Lala couldn't possibly be a model. "Italy has models, they don't need to bring people over from America". Um, well, yes....there ARE super models who work all over the world. Just because washed up, permed out, panic attack Tom isn't in hot demand in Europe, that doesn't mean Americans never work over there. 

 

At any rate, Lala was clearly selling a line of shit so she could go party in Italy, but I really didn't like the mean girl way Scheana and Katie went after her. Doesn't Scheana remember when Stassi was the HBIC, with her two cronies Katie and Kristen, and made her life at SUR a living hell? And now she wants to do it to someone else? Not cool. And while I generally like Katie, it's become quite clear to me that she's that insecure girl that always wants to sidle up to the most popular girl. 

 

I get really distracted when the girls are working. Those purses slung across their body. I just can't. It just looks so tacky and unprofessional. 

Edited by ghoulina
  • Love 7
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Tom humping Ariana on the couch in the furniture store- yuck. I hope they bought it. I thought it was funny when Ariana yelled "There's people!"

 

Oh gosh, I forgot about that! Or maybe I blocked it out of my mind. So gross. What do they need a new couch for anyhow? Can't they just look into each other's eyes and suddenly be on a leather sectional that isn't covered in the sex juices of their exes???

 

 

I'm not all the way through yet and have so much to say, but I couldn't wait.  OMG Scheana's apartment!  All the cheesy pictures of her and Shay!  Amazing.

 

What made it even better was that their apartment was so small, and cramped, with no style, just crap everywhere. And then there's these giant professional photos of them on the wall. It's one thing to see the giant portraits on the walls of mansion ala Kim Z, but in one of those teeny, tiny, depressing LA apartments? I don't know....it just gave me the giggles. 

 

But either way, buckle up, Detective Krazy Kristin has a new cheating scandal to investigate! Why would James give her his email password and/or who checks their partner's email? Regardless, Uber girl is this season's Vegas girl or Miami girl.

 

Next time just give the girl $10 and put her on a bus.

  • Love 5
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I'm trying to figure out how much the VanderFools make per season - $50000 each for the main ones?

 

The apartment Kristen is in - is it just hers and DJ Muppet Baby still has his bunkbed at mom's?

Or is this being leased by Bravo for 3 months while filming - I have to say it's relatively nice compared to the other abodes we've seen and she has a couch that does not look like it will induce scoliosis.

 

I totally see this season as Jame's revenge for Kristen making a fool out of him last season panting for Tom all season long.

 

How did Jerx meet Kentucky? On Instagram or Facebook? Do you thinking casting found her?

 

There's a clip of Jax arguing with someone and she says something about her boobs and he says he paid for them. So they had enough dead brain mass leftover from Jerx to fill her up.

 

I am Sooooooooo happy this show is back on

  • Love 1
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I'm trying to figure out how much the VanderFools make per season - $50000 each for the main ones?

Sooooooooo happy this show is back on

So, I think the main players (the ones in the opening) make at least $100k for the season, maybe more. I recall seeing somewhere that they made 5k per episode (and this was a season or 2 ago) and were trying to get a raise to 10k per episode. There are like 20 episodes (at least there was last year so I am expecting the same this year) so they gotta be making $100-$200k

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I gotta say, you all are cracking my shit up this morning!

Your comments are better tgan the show! :-D

How the Hell did Jax (or could, for that matter) pay for that girl's boobjob? One quarter at a time?

Edited by Ubiquitous
  • Love 1
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Kristen is... Kristen but I sorta kinda admire that she just got up and left DJ Muppet Baby at that table. Then he had to "pay the check." Har har.

 

Of course she had to guzzle the rest of her wine on the way out.  

  • Love 1
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Kristin's TH, said in that calm, all-knowing demeanor she has when she isn't acting bat shit crazy:  "James decided to have the balls to tell me the truth.  Which proves to me he wants to work on this."  Oh, girl.

 

I almost feel sorry for her because she's so stupid.  But I think her kind of stupid is a choice and not genetic and I can't get behind that.

  • Love 5
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I totally see this season as Jame's revenge for Kristen making a fool out of him last season panting for Tom all season long.

 

Yup. I can see their relationship being one long tit-for-tat. 

 

How the Hell did Jax (or could, for that matter) pay for that girl's boobjob? One quarter at a time?

 

Well now, remember, Jax is "friends" with the doctor who did HIS plastic surgery, so he didn't pay full price for his nose. Maybe his "friendship" also got him a boob discount? 

  • Love 4
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Well now, remember, Jax is "friends" with the doctor who did HIS plastic surgery, so he didn't pay full price for his nose. Maybe his "friendship" also got him a boob discount? 

Then I guess she'll be back to that discount rate Dr. several times to get them right. 

  • Love 2
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If you think adulting is dry humping your girlfriend in a furniture store, you're doing it wrong.

I'll admit to chuckling when the sales guy suggested the smaller, deeper sofa and Tom turned to Arianna and said, "Is this too...'deep'...for you?"  Wink.  And they both started laughing.  I liked that moment.

And I loved the couch they picked.  I'm all about the button-tucked, constructed sofa.  And that the chaise part was wide enough for two.  This is about as close as we're ever going to get to apartment porn when it comes to this cast of characters.  Because Scheana's apartment? Dang.  At first, I was thinking that they're young marrieds in their first apartment and aw, how cute.  But, although newly married, aren't they both on the other side of 30?

Edited by ryebread
  • Love 2
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I'm so confused about the Uber situation with James and Jenna. I thought he and Kristen lived together. So where was she when he brought another girl back from 3-6. Did it not say, "James and Kristen's apartment" during that scene last episode? Was she asleep in another room? Was she staying somewhere else? I need details, people!

By my understanding, James still has a pied-à-terre in WeHo, which is supposedly close to Jenna's place. Hence the shared Uber, which (per Scheana) Kristen is also to blame for, as she didn't feel like hanging any longer with her Fireball-infused Muppet Baby.

 

Of course she had to guzzle the rest of her wine on the way out.

That just added to the cinematic quality of the scene.

  • Love 5
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By my understanding, James still has a pied-à-terre in WeHo, which is supposedly close to Jenna's place.

 

Ahhh, thanks for the info. Does he also have a saucy, black doorman? 

 

 

 

(Apologies if no one gets my Baby Mama reference.)

  • Love 1
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Kristin's TH, said in that calm, all-knowing demeanor she has when she isn't acting bat shit crazy:  "James decided to have the balls to tell me the truth.  Which proves to me he wants to work on this."  Oh, girl.

 

I almost feel sorry for her because she's so stupid.  But I think her kind of stupid is a choice and not genetic and I can't get behind that.

I don't think Kristen is stupid...she does idiotic things.

 

When she said the bolded above I did a Oh Girl too. I feel sorry for her because she seems to have stereotyped herself into the long suffering cheated on martyr of a girlfriend. The same role she played while with Tom. This is what she is "used" to and her "normal". You're right in it's a choice - and she is comfortable with that choice cause she knows how it plays out...much easier in her head than the scary unknown if she breaks it off with him right now.

 

That's why I was wondering how much these fools make per season and if Bravo is leasing that apartment. If she breaks off with Muppet Reject now...how will she film rest of the season? She has no excuse to be hanging out in the SUR alley if she and James break now. If the apartment is being leased by Bravo does the Muppy keep it and she is homeless? She will keep him and go back and forth with him for a while so that she gets her weekly Bravo check.

  • Love 2
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Or an appearance on Botched.

Ooooh new show idea....call it Crotched

 

It will take place in a clinic. Main star will be Jerx and other Reality Show cast members across all channels.

Each will be treated for their STD for free and throw in some crappy plastic surgery free of charge.

 

I think I would watch an episode here and there like I do with Hoarders (peeking through my fingers)

  • Love 3
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I'm kind of not feeling Ariana this season. I liked her when she first came on the show because while Kristen was obsessed with her and slinging insults at her, Ariana rose above and acted unaffected by it. Now all she contributes to conversation is talking about Kristen, how Scheana's friendship with Kristen bothers her, and making snide remarks about Kristen. It's like the roles have reversed. You got the guy Ariana-let that be enough and act like Kristen doesn't exist if need be. It's tired at this point.

Katie's septum ring. I can't.

James and Lala are actually dating in real life now (you can look at her Instagram and see) and I feel like that's probably a good pairing. I wanted to shake Kristen when she was buying his bullshit. What 22 year old guy invites a hot girl up to his apartment at 3am to makeout? Is she kidding? I was proud of her in that scene at the bar where she told him she was done and walked out and then wanted to bang my head against the wall when she let him back in.

  • Love 6
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Uh....Kristin drives a BMW convertible? What the hell does she DO?

The only thing she stated doing for work is a tshirt line (and of course working for Bravo). But I can't imagine that's enough to sustain that type of lifestyle. Bravo leasing the apartment for the season makes sense, or maybe she's getting some help from family.

  • Love 1
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Uh....Kristin drives a BMW convertible? What the hell does she DO?

Besides hack her boyfriend's phone and drink wine?  I got....nothing.  Oh, wait, she has that shitty t-shirt line. 

 

There wasn't an actual license plate on the back of the car - it looked like a dealer tag.  Either the car was on loan to the show for Kristen to drive or they don't want to broadcast her actual license plate number.  Of course, if that was the case why not just blur the number?  

  • Love 3
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I feel Arianna has taking A LOT of verbal abuse from Kristin both directly and indirectly, as well as having to deal with lots of very uncomfortable and tense situations because you never know what's going to set off Kristin. Kristin's treatment of her made her dissolve into tears and not eat during Schenna's bachelor/bachelorette party. I think she's been very emotionally affected by how she's been treated and has been trying to hold it back. So I am really happy Arianna is setting a boundary with Schenna and speaking her mind about Kristin. If I were Arianna, I would have exploded a long time ago.

I think for all of Kristin's issues, she's careful and cautious with how she spends her money. Which is why she has a nice apartment and drives a BMW and the other apartments look like they're rented by Meth addicts.

I feel Kristin is trying by to change her image, which is why she's trying to stay calm while being FILMED. Remember, they discussed to Kristin throwing a drink on someone when James was DJing. Whether the internal will change with the external is to be seen. She said she was in therapy and trying to not be so overreactive.

I agree that James' was practically giddy in his interview where he admitted to cheating. And I agree it's probably bc he hates Kristin now AND he's securing his place in the show.

So him and Lala are dating now? Does this mean she no longer is giving blowjobs for trips to Italy? I don't know what's grosser, dating James or being a traveling hooker. He really does prefer his women insecure and bitchy.

Also not a fan of Katie's septum ring.

Isn't Stassi coming back?

My autocorrect keeps trying to change Kristin to Krustin. LOL

Edited by Silo
  • Love 1
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Re: Kristin and James living together -- I don't think they ever lived together. I remember reading an interview with Kristin where she said her (now old) apartment that she got after she broke up with Tom would not let her film there, so she had to film at James' apartment. Hence her doing her makeup on the floor in front of a mirror LOL. I love her new apartment; I feel like every time it is shown, the producers are underlying snarking on Tom's gross and messy apartment. 

 

I remember Jenna from Scheana's wedding episodes as a bridesmaid, and I *think* she was a server/worked at Villa Blanca? Don't ask me why I remember all of this useless VPR facts. 

Edited by Elizabeth
  • Love 3
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Elizabeth, you remember those details because VPR is EVERYTHING. 

 

That said, my damn DVR did NOT record last night's episode and I feel highly deficient.  How to start my Tuesday without my chucklefucks?   Hopefully a reairing will broadcast today and I'll be able to watch and comment this evening.

 

It does seem like the show is setting the groundwork for some Shay intervention.  I feel sorry for him - - I would need to self medicate too if I had to be party to all this fuckery firsthand.

 

So Kristen has a t-shirt line (which apparently is what 3 t-shirts is considered nowadays) and she's an unemployed server who spends a large amount of time skulking around Sur dumpsters.  And she drives a BMW.  Has she taken any Beemer selfies yet?  Clearly I have chosen the wrong path in life, as demonstrated by my Honda.  Must go home to start on my t-shirt line immediately, while eyeing relevant dumpsters in my area.

  • Love 8
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I'm new to posting on this thread.

 

Just wanted to share Pumped Podcast is back on.

They usually post a week after episode airs so today they just posted Episode one's recap.

 

Just google Pumped Podcast - I listen to it on soundcloud.

 

Last year each podcast included guest appearance from 1 or 2 of the VanderFools

  • Love 1
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Uh....Kristin drives a BMW convertible? What the hell does she DO?

 

 

Besides hack her boyfriend's phone and drink wine?  I got....nothing.  Oh, wait, she has that shitty t-shirt line. 

 

There wasn't an actual license plate on the back of the car - it looked like a dealer tag.  Either the car was on loan to the show for Kristen to drive or they don't want to broadcast her actual license plate number.  Of course, if that was the case why not just blur the number?  

 

She's got some Bravo money and it was only a 1 series.  I think the 1 convertibles started at under $40k and if you knew what you were doing lease payments would be well under $400.  It's not uncommon to not put your plates on until you get a fix it ticket for it, at least in LA.  With a lease you might even be able to turn it in and get the next one without having put the plates on it.  

 

You also have  to keep in mind that a BMW 3 series is like the Honda Civic of LA.  It isn't a big deal, everyone has one.

Edited by yourmomiseasy
  • Love 1
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What 22 year old guy invites a hot girl up to his apartment at 3am to makeout? Is she kidding?

 

I may be horrible, but I never believe dudes when they say all they did was make out. I never believed Schwartz either. 

 

Oh wait, didn't James say he "started" to take her clothes off? And then he just stopped? Yea, okay. 

 

Yes, I have little faith. 

 

And for the love of all that is holy put a shirt with some sleeves on!

 

Not just the sleeves, but why do those tank tops need to hang down so much in front? I'm sick of looking at his concave cleavage. 


I wonder if we'll see Lala and James get together his season. When did they stop filming? Because going by her IG, they've been together at least 5 months. 

  • Love 5
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