Maddie Brown: Seeking a One-Woman Man

[ginger90]

Maddie chose a friend as her maid of honor. I wonder how that went over.

[Jellybeans]

9 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Maddie chose a friend as her maid of honor. I wonder how that went over.

She did?  

Well good for her!

[Kohola3]

Quote

Maddie chose a friend as her maid of honor. I wonder how that went over.

I bet Princess Mariah's knickers are in a knot. After all, she is the Eldest Female Cousin of the First Wife.  Oops, mom messed that up.

[truelovekiss]

On 5/4/2016 at 11:37 AM, ginger90 said:

Maddie chose a friend as her maid of honor. I wonder how that went over.

I'm going to give the benefit of the doubt and say that was an act of diplomacy, since she has so many sisters. There's Princess Mariah, Aspyn and Mykelti who were all born within a year of her. Savannah is her only full Sister with the same mom, but she's like 12ish? Then there's all the rest. How does she choose one? I think picking a non-sister and then having all of her sisters on the same level was smart.

[laurakaye]

On 5/2/2016 at 4:24 PM, truelovekiss said:

Probably.  You know she's going to make this as much about herself as possible.  And then Kody will try to guilt Maddie into letting him gallop down the aisle with Solomon and Ariella as the Ring Bearer and Flower Girl, and then jog back up the aisle, locks flowing, to retrieve her.  And maybe in a Duggarish move, he might demand that he gets to walk EVERY SINGLE ONE of his wives up the aisle, because having them walk with another man would be disrespectful to him.

 

I can totally picture this in my mind, too.  Gotta get that frizzy, cave-man hair to flap in the breeze somehow.

And good for Maddie for not choosing a sister as her maid of honor...but you know that somewhere, Robyn is seething that Maddie didn't choose Aurora - the eldest daughter of the only legal Brown wife - for her maid of honor, as a testament to the strategic seamless blending of Robyn and her kids into the Brown family.

Edited May 6, 2016 by laurakaye

[truelovekiss]

2 hours ago, laurakaye said:

I can totally picture this in my mind, too.  Gotta get that frizzy, cave-man hair to flap in the breeze somehow.

And good for Maddie for not choosing a sister as her maid of honor...but you know that somewhere, Robyn is seething that Maddie didn't choose Aurora - the eldest daughter of the only legal Brown wife - for her maid of honor, as a testament to the strategic seamless blending of Robyn and her kids into the Brown family.

Don't worry. Robyn will have her moment. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb and breakdown the episode. 

5% recapping Meri, Janelle and Christine's weddings

10% recapping Robyn and Kody's wedding(s)

10% Solomon and Ariella being speshul

5% Aurora clamoring for attention

5% grilling Maddie about when she will reproduce 

5% grilling Maddie about why she's not open to sister wives

10% grilling the other grown kids about plural marriage and their current personal lives

20% hilarious mishaps with dresses or flowers or something

10% Kody criticizing Maddie, while flipping his hair

5% Kody blustering at Caleb about taking care of his daughter

5% Christine trying to plan a hilarious prank

5% Meri looking like she gives no fucks

5% actual Maddie wedding

Pretty sure that equals 100%

[Kohola3]

I believe we have a winner.

[ginger90]

Add the most used, "will we make it there in time?" bullshit.

[Misslindsey]

Quote

Robyn is seething that Maddie didn't choose Aurora - the eldest daughter of the only legal Brown wife - for her maid of honor, as a testament to the strategic seamless blending of Robyn and her kids into the Brown family.

Robyn's wedding gift will probably be a creepy painting of her kids with Maddie and Caleb. Hell, she will probably add her and Kody in the painting as well. Then she will give them said gift while weeping uncontrollably. As this is all happening there will be shots of the older kids giving wtf looks. 

[Jellybeans]

Let me add... this thread will be FAR more entertaining than the show.

[CofCinci]

9 minutes ago, Jellybeans said:

Let me add... this thread will be FAR more entertaining than the show.

I only watch the series to chat with you all about it. 

[Jellybeans]

Speaking of, when does the show return?  

[ginger90]

8 hours ago, Jellybeans said:

Speaking of, when does the show return?  

Tomorrow night. They're baaaaaaack......

[laurakaye]

On 5/6/2016 at 5:04 PM, truelovekiss said:

Don't worry. Robyn will have her moment. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb and breakdown the episode. 

5% recapping Meri, Janelle and Christine's weddings

10% recapping Robyn and Kody's wedding(s)

10% Solomon and Ariella being speshul

5% Aurora clamoring for attention

5% grilling Maddie about when she will reproduce 

5% grilling Maddie about why she's not open to sister wives

10% grilling the other grown kids about plural marriage and their current personal lives

20% hilarious mishaps with dresses or flowers or something

10% Kody criticizing Maddie, while flipping his hair

5% Kody blustering at Caleb about taking care of his daughter

5% Christine trying to plan a hilarious prank

5% Meri looking like she gives no fucks

5% actual Maddie wedding

Pretty sure that equals 100%

This is beautiful, and if I had paid attention in 4th grade when we were learning about percentages, I would totally do the math for the actual show and compare it to this.

We know for sure that there's going to be several shots of Kody whizzing around the cuddle-sac in a pseudo-frantic manner, pretending that it's his job to get everyone loaded up in the Brown Family Caravan for the wedding.  He is a master at acting like he's super frazzled when in actuality, he's doing nothing at all.  It's just his way of making sure the camera gets lots of hair-flipping shots.

Edited May 11, 2016 by laurakaye

[RazzleberryPie]

On May 6, 2016 at 5:04 PM, truelovekiss said:

Don't worry. Robyn will have her moment. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb and breakdown the episode. 

5% recapping Meri, Janelle and Christine's weddings

10% recapping Robyn and Kody's wedding(s)

10% Solomon and Ariella being speshul

5% Aurora clamoring for attention

5% grilling Maddie about when she will reproduce 

5% grilling Maddie about why she's not open to sister wives

10% grilling the other grown kids about plural marriage and their current personal lives

20% hilarious mishaps with dresses or flowers or something

10% Kody criticizing Maddie, while flipping his hair

5% Kody blustering at Caleb about taking care of his daughter

5% Christine trying to plan a hilarious prank

5% Meri looking like she gives no fucks

5% actual Maddie wedding

Pretty sure that equals 100%

You win the internet today. Can we add in something about Christine making up a dance, Robyn being salty and sour - whining about Maddie being soooo young, probably inserts in a Stolen Cookie Purity Jab, and the obligatory reference to secret (fake and illegal) weddings because of persecution. 

[ShaNaeNae]

On Friday, May 06, 2016 at 4:04 PM, truelovekiss said:

Don't worry. Robyn will have her moment. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb and breakdown the episode.

5% recapping Meri, Janelle and Christine's weddings

10% recapping Robyn and Kody's wedding(s)

10% Solomon and Ariella being speshul

5% Aurora clamoring for attention

5% grilling Maddie about when she will reproduce

5% grilling Maddie about why she's not open to sister wives

10% grilling the other grown kids about plural marriage and their current personal lives

20% hilarious mishaps with dresses or flowers or something

10% Kody criticizing Maddie, while flipping his hair

5% Kody blustering at Caleb about taking care of his daughter

5% Christine trying to plan a hilarious prank

5% Meri looking like she gives no fucks

5% actual Maddie wedding

Pretty sure that equals 100%

Add to Aurora clamoring for attention, it has to be WITH TEARS and almost always with a male.

We also need to fit in Kody with a furrowed brow with that look he gets on his face like he's trying to rememer how to spell his first name.

Also, add in an embarassing moment for Kody when he tries to show off for Caleb and pretends to be all manly to fulfill his dreams with his man crush.

[RazzleberryPie]

Maddie better leave out the 'does anyone have a reason that these two should not get married' line out of her ceremony. Between Kody clammorring to make a scene and Aurora's drama, one of them will run to the altar in tears.

[laurakaye]

2 hours ago, ShaNaeNae said:

We also need to fit in Kody with a furrowed brow with that look he gets on his face like he's trying to remember how to spell his first name.

 

Sad thing is, I know exactly what face you are talking about...one can almost hear him thinking, and smell the burning of too many neurons attempting to fire at the same time.

[CofCinci]

[toodles]

On 5/12/2016 at 10:38 AM, laurakaye said:

Sad thing is, I know exactly what face you are talking about...one can almost hear him thinking, and smell the burning of too many neurons attempting to fire at the same time.

I think that is his I'm trying not to fart look.

Edited May 16, 2016 by toodles

[CofCinci]

Is the wedding today?

[toodles]

19 minutes ago, CofCinci said:

Is the wedding today?

I think so.  It sounds like your invitation was lost in the mail.  I'm sure that's what happened to mine.  Lol

[Galloway Cave]

Looks like Kody got to shine as the officiant of the ceremony:

http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/sister-wives-star-maddie-brown-marries-caleb-brush-w208801

[CofCinci]

I thought they'd go with more of a Banana Republic/Jcrew khaki pant for the men -- and not the Carharts he seems to be wearing.  Or at least a new pair of pants?!!

No pics on social media posted by friends or family, so they must have an exclusive deal with one of the magazines. 

Edit - That doesn't look like the dress from the show either. 

Edited June 5, 2016 by CofCinci

[ReadMeLattice]

She's getting married today. 

[Absolom]

She was married before the article posted I think.

[Snarklepuss]

2 hours ago, CofCinci said:

I thought they'd go with more of a Banana Republic/Jcrew khaki pant for the men -- and not the Carharts he seems to be wearing.  Or at least a new pair of pants?!!

No pics on social media posted by friends or family, so they must have an exclusive deal with one of the magazines. 

Edit - That doesn't look like the dress from the show either. 

Those aren't really "khakis" as they are usually defined either.  They're more like khaki colored jeans.  I suppose this doesn't surprise me at a wedding at a Montana farm the bride described as "Bohemian", LOL.  I think he looks more like someone you'd meet at a Starbucks than a Bohemian, but what do I know?  LOL.  I don't think he looked that bad - He actually looked better than I thought he would, but after an evening in that fabric - The pants already look a little worn in the formal shot, imagine after 7 hours! 

From one of the videos it sounds like this was a compromise for Maddie which means to me that she really wanted the formal affair and he wanted it more casual.  That explains why their looks don't match.  I am happy to say that Mr. Snarkle and I always agreed on stuff like that.  We agreed on everything for our wedding.  We have always agreed on most things....I know, we're boring, but we've been married for 36 years so we must be doing something right!

It's hard to see the dress in the photo behind the huge bouquet, but it could be the same dress.  I see the appliques on the flare part.  But the dress doesn't look like it flares as much as the one we saw her wear in the shop.  It's hard to see in the photo.  She looks beautiful, though.

Edited June 5, 2016 by Snarklepuss

[lookeyloo]

8 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

 

From one of the videos it sounds like this was a compromise for Maddie which means to me that she really wanted the formal affair and he wanted it more casual.  That explains why their looks don't match.  I am happy to say that Mr. Snarkle and I always agreed on stuff like that.  We agreed on everything for our wedding.  We have always agreed on most things....I know, we're boring, but we've been married for 36 years so we must be doing something right!

 

She does look beautiful. Radiant?  Maybe.  Unless they can resolve differences successfully (as in they each got the parts of the wedding they wanted, it seems) it will be a long road ahead.  Just like you, Snarklepuss, Mr. lookeyloo and I agree on almost everything and can bend when we don't and have also been married well over 30 years.  

[SongbirdHollow]

I had to look up "Bohemian", because if they're using it correctly, I'm not. Apparently today the word just means unconventional. Even that doesn't seem to fit, though. I've seen plenty of weddings where the bride is traditionally garbed and the guy is more casual. Next, I'll have to look up "khaki" because in my mind they're like the old Dockers pants, not thick work Carhartts.

Whatever. Her makeup looks good. He looks like a total dweeb. OF COURSE Kody had to officiate. 

[AZChristian]

I want to know if Kody walked all four "wives" down the aisle first (one at a time, of course), before running back to walk Maddie down the aisle, then officiating.  And did he do SOMETHING with his hair first?

[Kohola3]

I don't know how the "bohemian" movement came to be. I am descended from true Bohemians - that is immigrants from Bohemia in what is now the Czech Republic.  None of my ancestors wore Dockers or Carhartts.  Or flowing hippy-style dresses, either.  

[CofCinci]

I imagine the groom and his groomsmen were all sweaty and smelly, as he is a wearing winter-weight fabrics. Guess the odor completes the bohemian theme they were going for with the wedding. 

Edited June 5, 2016 by CofCinci

[Misslindsey]

Maddie and Caleb both look happy. Caleb seems like a low key guy so I am not surprised that his khakis are not the standard khakis. If they compromised on incorporating elements that each of them liked good for them. Though I can see Caleb caring a bit on what he wears and not so much about the rest of the event. I would have to see the reception set up to see if they had bohemian elements, but either way it isn't my wedding and they seem happy with everything, so I guess I do not care that much overall. 

As much as I do not care for the Roloff's, I think Zach and Tori's and Jeremy and Audrey's weddings were really nice in terms of reality television weddings. I thought both weddings really looked like each couple (if that makes sense), and turned out very beautiful.

[CofCinci]

Any pics of the free sausage casing the sister wives poured themselves into for the wedding yet?  Curious to see what they're wearing. 

[Kohola3]

Quote

...the free sausage casing the sister wives poured themselves...

Complete with Mormon undershirts hanging out....

[3girlsforus]

So it seems that Maddie was not married in the Mormon church if Kody officiated. I would assume they would require a Mormon leader to officiate the ceremony. The only way Kody would have the legal ability to marry someone is if he got one of those internet licenses. Or do you think they had Kody "marry" them in this ceremony so there would be pictures to sell and video for the show, but then the legal and spiritual ceremony was done in a Mormon church.

Either way, the idea of Kody officiating makes me want to throw up.

[Lsk02]

Maddie said a while ago that she wasn't joining the Mormon church because they were going to make her disassociate with her family, or something like that. I thought I read here that Caleb is Catholic, but with Kody officiating it wasn't a Catholic ceremony either. 

[CofCinci]

With a dress like that, you can easily tell it's not a Mormon wedding. 

Kody could have done the $10 internet ordination or the couple married in their community and Kody officiated for the show only. 

Edited June 5, 2016 by CofCinci

[Kohola3]

Quote

Maddie said a while ago that she wasn't joining the Mormon church because they were going to make her disassociate with her family, or something like that.

That's what I thought as well.  I seem to recall her saying something about joining a Christian church of some kind.  But no priest, no Catholic wedding.  My bet would be that Kody officiating is all for show (and the show) and they got legally married somewhere else.

[3girlsforus]

3 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

That's what I thought as well.  I seem to recall her saying something about joining a Christian church of some kind.  But no priest, no Catholic wedding.  My bet would be that Kody officiating is all for show (and the show) and they got legally married somewhere else.

This is what I'm hoping. I hope they had someone else... anyone else - even an Elvis impersonator - marry them legally. It's disgusting enough that Kody had to be the attention for the show wedding. But I really hope they got wedding vows between the two of them without Klown standing right there being the moron that he is. 

[NoeNoe]

I thought the Mormon church basically denied Maddie, and that she said she would not be joining any other church, because  there wasn't any others that matched her beliefs. 

[AZChristian]

From what I've learned in my 10 seconds of online research, there doesn't need to be any officiant AT ALL in Montana.  The couple can just recite their vows to each other and then send in the completed paperwork.

But, of course, NO Brown child could EVER be married without the cult leader front and center.  

[Kohola3]

Quote

But, of course, NO Brown child could EVER be married without the cult leader front and center.

Gotta ensure access to that heavenly planet....

[3girlsforus]

51 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

But, of course, NO Brown child could EVER be married without the cult leader front and center.  

Of course not.  He's a two year old. Everything is about him. 

[CofCinci]

1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

From what I've learned in my 10 seconds of online research, there doesn't need to be any officiant AT ALL in Montana.  The couple can just recite their vows to each other and then send in the completed paperwork.

But, of course, NO Brown child could EVER be married without the cult leader front and center.  

Oh wow. That's pretty neat about Montana. 

[laurakaye]

One wonders if Kody even realized Maddie was there, given his mancrush on Caleb.

[truelovekiss]

On 6/5/2016 at 10:25 AM, CofCinci said:

Any pics of the free sausage casing the sister wives poured themselves into for the wedding yet?  Curious to see what they're wearing. 

Don't worry, I'm sure we'll get a full episode about that at some point, so we can relive the commitment ceremony. They will talk extensively about their own (and each other's) personalities, likes, dislikes and body image issues. And then MORALITY MORALITY MORALITY NO VISIBLE SHOULDERS OR CLEVAGE BECAUSE JESUS. But skin tight to the point of being unflattering is fine, because you don't actually SEE the skin.

Edited June 8, 2016 by truelovekiss

[Galloway Cave]

From The Principle Tumblr:

http://politicsrusprinciple.tumblr.com/tagged/Maddie-Brown

A red velvet groomsman cake in the shape of an elk (calling Steel Magnolias!). Kody dancing like a fool (duh). TLC filming. A Carhart Extravaganza!

[Celia Rubenstein]

Why is the Sound Choice coalition person being so side-eye-ish about Maddie marrying a guy who is "pals" with Montana polygamists?  Is this person implying Caleb might have a secret plan to drag Maddie into a kind of marriage they have BOTH stated is not going to be part of their future?  Hmph.  I think it is kind of insulting to suggest Maddie may be blindly bumbling into a marriage where she will be forced into something she doesn't want to participate in.  She's not an idiot.  That comment about jumping from the frying pan into the fire seems completely unnecessary. 

Sorry, lol ... I like Maddie and I guess I am a little defensive of her.  And I think she deserves credit for openly disavowing polygamy - not weaselish comments that insinuate she may be a victim of the institution she knows all about and has declared she wants no part of.  She deserves more respect that that.  

[riverblue22]

56 minutes ago, Galloway Cave said:

From The Principle Tumblr:

http://politicsrusprinciple.tumblr.com/tagged/Maddie-Brown

A red velvet groomsman cake in the shape of an elk (calling Steel Magnolias!). Kody dancing like a fool (duh). TLC filming. A Carhart Extravaganza!

Oh dear, I don't think I'm gonna like Janelle's dress.