Season 3 Discussion

[RCharter]

Fernandito's mother is a less pleasant looking version of my mother in law.

My husband does an infinitely better job of shutting her down than old Fernandito does.

You could tell, before Carolina got there, that his mama was taking notes. Hates flowers, check. Loves cats, check. She's probably going to fill the house with cut flowers and pretend that she didn't recall the conversation where she learned they're not a beloved item.

It could escalate like "The War of the Roses" between those two.

Carolina would do well to never tell her about any allergies she has.

[IvySpice]

I don't know, I thought the cabbage and sausage looked pretty good. I think it was the soup Svetlana was trying to get rid of (rudely).

 

I would never let my mother speak to my fiance that way. What a bigoted bitch.

 

Also, Dirk? Polygamy was illegal from the word go. That was a big part of the reason for the move to Utah: it wasn't part of the United States then. The church banned it only when the United States threatened to take all of the church's property if they didn't stop. So quit lying about how it was legal back in the day.

Edited November 24, 2015 by IvySpice

[JasonH]

So why exactly did Melanie suggest a pre-nup a few episodes ago? I knew when she was saying it she didn't have jack shit. I have a feeling her folks are paying for the wedding as well as the platinum rings....ah yes, most definitely.<br />So happy that Loren said she would let it go(the modeling). I'm sure that she is good about letting things go. <br />I knew Fernandos mom was going to be like that. I couldn't help but laugh. The fact that someone could be that nasty doesn't seem realistic. I feel like Fernando sees his mom as a drama queen and harmless and doesn't have the awareness that his fianc may not find it cute. <br />Marc and Nikki are just kind of getting old, but what was up with the black eye? And he had some bad make up job in one of his interviews. It just seems gross now, like Mohhamad and Danielle. I do enjoy seeing him in those silk shirts(I had one proudly in 91), short shorts.

[biakbiak]

Because even though Melanie is currently tight on funds, she will most likely build back up the coffers when she is no longer going off to Jamica every other month and will probably always make more money than Devar.

Edited November 24, 2015 by biakbiak

[Lemons]

I noticed that, too! In fact the whole side of his face look discolored. It looked like he had taken a fall or maybe been in an accident.

Maybe bruising from plastic surgery? And how about that hairy back? how any teenage girl can stomache having to touch that is beyond me.

Edited November 24, 2015 by Lemons

[Dahlia]

Perhaps a run in with the track lights while doing funny stuff on the zebra sheets.

Cannot stop giggling

[locomoco]

Perhaps a run in with the track lights while doing funny stuff on the zebra sheets.

Watching the sun rise is dangerous stuff...

[KarmaG]

I don't have a very clear picture about traditional Mormon food, but I suspect it involves a lot of mayonnaise, mini marshmallows and Jell-o. Why in the world did these people think they could pull off another country's cuisine? And why didn't they ask Aleksandra for input or help?

According to a good friend who's Mormon, a typical "Mormon" dinner is the same as everyone else just no caffeine or alcohol. And perhaps they didn't ask because they were trying to do something nice on their own. I feel for them, they're damned if they do and damned if they don't.

[deltaburkefan]

I thought the sausage and cabbage and soup seemed okay for a regular meal, but Russians are super into hospitality and will go all out and make a lot of different kinds of food, so maybe it seemed a little cheap/lazy to them. Also if you have a campfire and you're not cooking potatoes by burying them in the ashes, you're not living. However, I feel like Aleksandra's parents had already been in town a few days, bc her dad was in a BYU tshirt, so maybe they were already used to their ways.

[cooksdelight]

If I go to someone's home in a foreign country and they serve me food I may not like, I suck it up and be gracious, and thankful for their hospitality. Happened to me once on a trip to Wales, when I had no idea what a cheese and pickle sandwich was all about. :) Not to mention beans on toast for breakfast.

I think this was another case of producer manipulation in an effort to drive up the angst between the two different families. Sorry, I see a couple very much in love and parents trying hard to act for the cameras on behalf of this crazy show their kids chose to be a part of.

[deltaburkefan]

yeah, I didn't really notice anything weird, just how I perceived the cabbage/sausage thing, since people were saying it was gross. 

 

Also I thought it was super cute when Vladimir jumped up and down with excitement! Josh and Aleksandra should move to Kirov and live with them instead.

Edited November 24, 2015 by deltaburkefan

[trimthatfat]

I thought it was nice of Josh's parents to try to make a cultural meal for Aleksandra's parents, but I question how authentic the recipe was since her parents looked at the food like they'd never seen anything like it before. I think it would have been better to ask Aleksandra for her input. I don't think her parents were rude - they were just neutral about it. If the food wasn't appealing to them, I don't think they should have had to eat more than they felt comfortable eating. I suppose they could have looked happier, but eh.

[BethBud]

I got the feeling that Aleksandra looked like she was cringing during that part, which made me think she had nothing to do with the meal planning. I agree that the thought behind it was sweet. It just seemed so unappetizing, which made me wonder whether they asked Aleksandra for help.

 

Maybe cringing because of her mom's behavior? Regardless, her mom was rather rude. Hoping it gets better from hereon out! :)

[Neurochick]

I watched this last night and I felt very bad for Nikki.   I think Mark believes himself to be a stud, so he probably figures a woman his age wouldn't be up to his standards.  But the things he wants in life are not the things a 19 year old would want.  If Mark wanted to be with a younger woman, fine, a 35 year old would be okay but Nikki is a child and can't be expected to make serious decisions like wanting to have a child, at her age.  

 

I think Kyle needs to tell Noon why he and his parents aren't close.  If you're going to spend the rest of your life with someone, they deserve to know, it's not like Noon is a random hook up.  I wonder if the producers are pushing this issue.

 

Fernando's mother is awful, awful, awful.  I don't think it's an act either.  She acts like her son walks on water and shits rainbows.  I wonder if she's Cuban.  Someone should tell her that though cocaine might come from Columbia, one of the ways it comes to the US is through the Caribbean, so she needs to STFU.

 

I really do see love between Josh and Aleksandra.  I thought it was interesting what Josh's mother said about polygamy, that it was necessary when they were going through the plains and not something like, "it was needed to get into heaven."  I liked that Aleksandra's parents were concerned about her.  

[cooksdelight]

It was painful to watch Nikki and Mark at the early-bird special restaurant. And why the hell was he bugging her about getting in the water? Maybe she doesn't want to be seen riding your hairy-ass back out there. But then Mark said "This is very hard on ME" or whatever. Dude... you pick a teenager to be your wife, and you keep talking about your ex like she's still in the room.... yeah, things are going to be hard. For both of you. He looked rode hard and put away wet in that scene. He seems to be losing hair throughout this season, doesn't he?

It's his talking heads when he's one-on-one with the camera that he creeps me out the most. His eyes dart around, his speech pattern is uneven. He unnerves me. I cannot imagine him being anything but boring and quick in bed.

[grumpypanda]

Is it just me or did it look like Mark had a bruise under his right eye?

I noticed it too. I like to think that Nikki threw one of those mangos at his face.

[AussieBabe]

Mark needs a bracelet or some item that zaps or shocks him every bloody time he mentions his ex-wife. Nikki, gift him that for Christmas.

[charmed1]

I can see why most of Mark's kids want nothing to do with this show. How embarrassing it must be for them to see their father on national TV like this. And with a girl young enough to be their classmate. I wonder if they ever met Nikki off camera.

[KarmaG]

 The problem is that she ignored the fact that he hasn't been doing either of these things so far..... and like most humans, isn't likely to dramatically change his behavior/beliefs/values overnight.

 

Considering he was helping his family when he was in Jamaica, I don't think he needs to change his beliefs. Clearly he has a strong belief system that, imho, is family oriented. The only thing that needs to change is his status so he can actually work here and help Mel.

[Dahlia]

As some have explained, it seems that Fernando is a mama's boy, and her mother probably feels that she's being replaced by Carolina... This is a case where the mother definitely feels like she's losing her son, and not gaining a daughter-in-law.

I kept waiting for Carolina to reply to that nasty woman with the line they rehearsed in the car. Perhaps she's waiting for the perfect time....?

[nenya]

Could Josh's mom look more depressed? As strict as dad is, he seems to be trying. There were smiles and tendrils of warmth. But the mom just seems to unhappy. I understand the cameras are not for everyone, but to not even crack a smile?

[Tara Ariano]

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

 

'I'm Marrying A Weird Guy,' Says Resigned 90 Day Fiancé
The couples continue to settle in, with mixed results. Who fared the best and worst this week?

[Hero]

I can't watch Mark and Niki's scenes because it's just gross and awkward.

Fernando's mom reminds me of my grandmother. My uncle married someone who is not from our religion and my grandmother hates her. She said mean things about her and ignores her whenever she sees her. She is the only one who has a problem with it, and it's been almost 40 years.

[deltaburkefan]

Because I like to torture him, I made my Russian boyfriend watch the campfire scene and asked him what he thought of the food. To him, it seemed like the kind of food that you would get because you didn't have money for anything else. He also thought it seemed more like she was serving her husband rather than giving him her food that she didn't want.

[locomoco]

He seems to be losing hair throughout this season, doesn't he?

It just moved to his back

[charmed1]

He also thought it seemed more like she was serving her husband rather than giving him her food that she didn't want.

That's exactly how I saw it too. Then I started reading here and assumed I'd interpreted that scene incorrectly.

[Steve]

So Melanie admits she's broke, yet she needs to go dress shopping? Did she put that dress on her credit card? One of the employees mentioned a $2400 dress and since she has $0, how does that work? She has her priorities all screwed up. My friend got married for the 2nd time in 5 years and asked me and other friends to go dress  shopping with her, and I quickly said no. I went the first time and was not interested in repeating the experience.

 

I made a comment in an earlier thread that Melanie and Danielle from Series 2 (BIG Danielle) would have trouble keeping their trophy husbands in part because they don't have the bank accounts for it.  Someone replied that Melanie was in better financial shape and I let it go.  Apparently she's not in much better shape, and Danielle was in bad shape in every way.  If you want a trophy wife/husband you can't do it on a shoestring unless you're very attractive which Melanie is not.  Melanie's not bad, but if I were single I would have no interest in dating her and I'm 20+ years older.  Partly it's her tattoo, but even without that she's also out-of-shape.  Alongside pool boy she looks very out of shape.  But actually I like Devar, I just think his motives are different than Melanie's.  At some point he's going to want the hot young American woman that he can attract here and poor Melanie won't have much cash to keep him interested.

Edited November 24, 2015 by Steve

[ChristmasJones]

I think Melanie expects him to change his beliefs - she said she doesn't think he should be supporting his sisters, and that they are capable of working themselves.

[deltaburkefan]

Bringing someone over isn't cheap though. No idea how Danielle managed it + tickets to Doha. Her girlses must have done without :(

Melanie's problem is that she took several trips to Jamaica in a short span of time AND wants a relatively nice wedding that she has to pay for herself. She would have been in fine financial shape if she had taken less trips and been fine with a courthouse wedding. She has a good enough job to support a life in middle-of-nowhere PA.

Also if Melanie is out of shape, I shudder to think what I am ;)

Edited November 24, 2015 by deltaburkefan

[guilfoyleatpp]

I made a comment in an earlier thread that Melanie and Danielle from Series 2 (BIG Danielle) would have trouble keeping their trophy husbands in part because they don't have the bank accounts for it.  Someone replied that Melanie was in better financial shape and I let it go.  Apparently she's not in much better shape, and Danielle was in bad shape in every way.  If you want a trophy wife/husband you can't do it on a shoestring unless you're very attractive which Melanie is not.  Melanie's not bad, but if I were single I would have no interest in dating her and I'm 20+ years older.  Partly it's her tattoo, but even without that she's also out-of-shape.  Alongside pool boy she looks very out of shape.  But actually I like Devar, I just think his motives are different than Melanie's.  At some point he's going to want the hot young American woman that he can attract here and poor Melanie won't have much cash to keep him interested.

 

I'm so fascinated by this. You think that Melanie is out of shape? I think she's pretty fit. The thing they seem to have in common is that they like to work out.

 

I think they're pretty evenly matched in physical attractiveness. There's not such an imbalance as there was with Danielle and Mohammed.

 

And then we get to the gold digger connudrum - which is that some gold diggers are driven and some are opportunists.  Like everyone else, someone knows a good deal when they see it and maybe they're just not that ambitious. 

 

Not everyone has the same relationship requirements or finds the same types attractive. Also, once you get to know someone they can be much more attractive. I don't necessarily think that's the case with Danielle and Mohammed, but I can believe it for Melanie and Devar.

 

Fernando and Carolina...his mom is such a deal breaker. I don't even know what to do there.

[Kiss my mutt]

I was wondering how Alessandra's parents were able to get to the states. I remember the girl in the first season was from Russia and her parents weren't able to and she missed them so much. Is it just a matter of money? Aleksandra's mom is pretty hot and stylish. Josh's mom looks so matronly. She definitely seemed really uncomfortable around her parents.

I liked the dress Melanie she said she decided on but the veil just made her look silly. But I'm one that got my dress at Modcloth and married at city hall like another poster suggested!! (Second marriage)

Could Nikki have been more bored? How awful to think you are in for a life of early bird specials and lame re-dos from Mark's first marriage. And yeah, what was it with him asking over and over if she wants to get in the water? That just looked so miserable.

[deltaburkefan]

It's basically luck as to whether you get a tourist visa from Russia. Aleksandra's parents may have been able to prove more ties--property, minor children, etc. Also if you have gone abroad to other countries, especially Western Europe, it shows that you return to Russia. That would definitely help. With a daughter in Prague, they probably have gone.

Edited November 24, 2015 by deltaburkefan

[BethBud]

So Melanie admits she's broke, yet she needs to go dress shopping? Did she put that dress on her credit card? One of the employees mentioned a $2400 dress and since she has $0, how does that work? She has her priorities all screwed up. My friend got married for the 2nd time in 5 years and asked me and other friends to go dress  shopping with her, and I quickly said no. I went the first time and was not interested in repeating the experience.

 

Didn't she say it's too expensive or she can't afford it (something like that) after being told that dress cost $2400? I think she was looking for a cheaper dress than that. Maybe she never had the fantasy wedding she always dreamed off and now is making up for it, which is why she's wanting a dress and all of that.

[Steve]

I'm so fascinated by this. You think that Melanie is out of shape? I think she's pretty fit. The thing they seem to have in common is that they like to work out.

 

I think they're pretty evenly matched in physical attractiveness. There's not such an imbalance as there was with Danielle and Mohammed.

 

She's not fat, and I see some photos of her in Jamaica in a bikini where she looks like she's in shape.  But on the show a year later she looks like she's "out of shape".  I think he could be attracted to her.  I also think he could do a lot better here because he's in very good shape and he's 5 years younger.  Some girls are going to flirt with him.  After the honeymoon is over I say he's going to wander.  I may be wrong.  She was his ticket out of Jamaica.  It's not going to help that her bank account is low.

With the talk about Melanie not having money for a big wedding I would tell her to do what I did.  I paid a city judge $200 to marry my 90-day fiance and me in this gazebo on a Sunday.  Now it's our gazebo (figuratively).  After that take the family to Chili's like we did.  Their mango tilapia is out of this world.

 

[MrsSmartyPants]

Didn't she say it's too expensive or she can't afford it (something like that) after being told that dress cost $2400? I think she was looking for a cheaper dress than that. Maybe she never had the fantasy wedding she always dreamed off and now is making up for it, which is why she's wanting a dress and all of that.

 

 

That's all well and good, when you're Noon or Carolina - but ONCE YOU HAVE A CHILD?  You get your ass to David's Bridal and get a dress for $400 and save the other $2000 for your CHILD.  

 

I would give her a slight pass on the rings because you wear them 24/7 - so you may not want gold plated silver - but what's wrong with white gold instead of platinum?   Pick up the platinum bands for your 10 year anniversary.  But a dress that you wear ONCE for a couple of hours?  SHE doesn't have that luxury - since she's unable to afford it.  

 

I think Mel & Devar are equally yolked in the looks department - I think they're both below average facially - but above average in physique.

 

 

POOR Carolina.  Not only does she have to worry about being smothered by Fernandito's huge fucking tits and not being discovered for days in that over stuffed hoarder house - but she has to deal with his mother on a daily basis. 

 

Latinos are funny/weird to outsiders because of all the in-fighting between the different nationalities.  I am Cuban, but refused to marry a Cuban because I didn't want a Cuban mother in law - Fernandito's mom is a pretty good representation.  He has NO intention of standing up to her or defending his wife.  I think his first marriage ending had a lot less to do with his cheating and more to do with his mother and his reaction to her. 

 

It reminds me of Kandi Burress (Real Housewives of Atlanta) and how nasty her mother was to her husband, his mother, her friend, etc - but Kandi would dismiss it as 'no big deal' and "that's just how my mama is".   Just because YOU are willing to be abused by your mother doesn't mean that other people have to put up with it. 

[RCharter]

-I think Melanie is a textbook butterface.  Classic example.  And she does herself no favors with that weird combover and not using a color correcting makeup.  I don't think Devar is the best looking guy, but he is substantially better looking than Melanie, to me.  I think there is a good chance that he will be an exotic rarity in Mel's part of the world, so he will get offers.  And he doesn't seem all that committed to her, I think she was fun in small mini vacations to Jamacia when nothing was expected of him.  I think he will lose interest quick when real life sets in and she starts expecting money and ambition and instant father of him and he may stray to someone that is less work.

 

-LOL @ Fernando trying to sell that a house full of doo-dads is actually his house that he is just letting his parents live in.  Yeah, because so many men in their 30's love to decorate their home in knick knacks.  

 

-Fernando has no intention of defending Carolina because it doesn't fit with his agenda.  And he doesn't want his parents to kick him out of their house.

[WhoAmIReally]

Watching Melanie this week, I did think, "Wow, she's not just a butterface, she's a butterbody."  Not that she's fat, but I just find nothing appealing about her shape.  I guess she's probably firm and has good cardiovascular function, but there's absolutely nothing feminine about her.  I do find her a good match for Devar, because they both really seem to enjoy exercise, and, based on what I've seen on the show of the people who live up there, not many others do.  It's a nice thing they can do together.  She just has an aura of hardness and meaness that seems to be lurking under the surface that worries me.  They both seem really stubborn, although he's hiding it pretty well. 

 

She is an absolute fool to be spending money on that wedding.  An open bar?  However, I would not put it past her to lie to Devar about the state of her savings account just to make him feel bad.  She seems to be punishing him for not being able to work.  When I look at her when she's being a bitch, I see the piggy eyes of her nasty sister superimposed over her face.  I guess this means I am starting to dislike her. 

Edited November 24, 2015 by WhoAmIReally

[grumpypanda]

All this talk about Melanie being out of shape makes me feel like Jabba the Hutt. She may not be built like a super model but I think she has a pretty good figure. Her face though, no amount of cardio can fix that problem.

[lilabennet]

I am pretty sure that Melanie has lost a significant amount of weight at some point in her life.  And good for her, but her shape will never be very feminine because she has a large frame.

[ethalfrida]

Maybe Fernandito does own the house. Perhaps he rescued his parents during the housing crunch sort of thing. Just guessing but it could happen...

[biakbiak]

His mom was fighting cancer at the time but I agree he probably owns the house because of the presence of the cat and her di$like of them.

[RCharter]

Maybe Fernandito does own the house. Perhaps he rescued his parents during the housing crunch sort of thing. Just guessing but it could happen...

 

 

His mom was fighting cancer at the time but I agree he probably owns the house because of the presence of the cat and her di$like of them.

 

Have we ever even seen him go to a job?  I dont believe for a minute he owns that house, and I don't think he even pays rent.

 

I've also run into many Fernando's in my life, they always say that their parents live with them as a way to explain them living with their parents.  Its a very standard line.  And he said he "invited" his parents to live with him...not that he rescued them from bad economic times by taking over the mortgage.  But that house is very clearly not his.  He is a liar.

Edited November 25, 2015 by RCharter

[biakbiak]

We haven't seen Melanie go to a job either. He clearly is getting his money from somewhere because they mentioned multiple trips to Colombia and I can't imagine his mother not playing the "not in my house card" for both Carolina and the cat.

He also has to prove that he has some financial resources in order to qualify for the K1.

Edited November 25, 2015 by biakbiak

[RCharter]

We haven't seen Melanie go to a job either. He clearly is getting his money from somewhere because they mentioned multiple trips to Colombia and I can't imagine his mother not playing the "not in my house card" for both Carolina and the cat.

He also has to prove that he has some financial resources in order to qualify for the K1.

But we know what her job is.  Do we know what Fernando's job is?  All I've heard is that he does "business" in Colombia.  Melanie's job is clearly one where she can make an income to afford a home and there are no parents in the house either.  So it can be reasonably assumed, even if we didn't know what her job is, that she works and makes enough to afford a home.

 

His mother is never going to say "no" to her special son.  But she will have no problem taking out her disappointment on the girl.  This is the way that paternal cultures work.  The son is the special little prince and so mommy doesn't take him on, she takes on the evil woman that he brings home.  He may be getting money from his parents for the K1.  I don't think Dani had much money, but she got friends and family to kick in.

Edited November 25, 2015 by RCharter

[biakbiak]

I disagree. Given what we have seen of her, I don't think she would have allowed him get so far in the process or agree to be on the show if she were financially controlling him.

But again both are merely opinions based on speculation.

Edited November 25, 2015 by biakbiak

[RCharter]

I disagree. Given what we have seen of her, I don't think she would have allowed him get so far in the process or agree to be on the show if she were financially controlling him.

But again both are merely opinions based on speculation.

I don't think she would ever give him a hard no.  He is very, very important in her life.  Much easier to push the woman away.  I would wager money that she never approved of Fernando's wife, but she let him get married and probably went on to do everything she could to undermine his marriage.  She wouldn't risk losing him by coming out and just saying no, no matter what financial control she has.  He is probably more important to her than she is to him.  And I'm sure it gives her a great sense of power to stick it to whatever girl is in Fernando's life.  If she can keep him single and living with her that would be her ultimate dream.  

[deltaburkefan]

There is a poster for his internet company in his room in one of the earlier episodes. I think it's legit and that he is the owner of the house, but that he probably didn't have much in the way of decorations/furnishing. Then mom moved in and filled the house with her stuff.

[mittsigirl]

Okay, I give up-what exactly is a pickle & cheese sandwich?

Some funny comments on this page:)

[biakbiak]

Okay, I give up-what exactly is a pickle & cheese sandwich?

Some funny comments on this page:)

Cheese and Pickle Sandwich. I find them delicious but I unseen eating them all my life.

[RCharter]

There is a poster for his internet company in his room in one of the earlier episodes. I think it's legit and that he is the owner of the house, but that he probably didn't have much in the way of decorations/furnishing. Then mom moved in and filled the house with her stuff.

I'm certain he doesn't own that house.  The knick knacks in the house look like the sort of thing built up over years of living in a house.  I do think its tempting to believe people and take them at their word.  But having run into many Fernando's of the world I know how standard the line "my parents live with me" is for a single man 30+ living with his parents.

 

I've never encountered any homeowner, who has lived in their home for years,that was so barren someone could literally move all their furnishing and doo dads into.  Maybe if they literally just purchased the home, but after they have been there for a year or two there is normally something in the house.  And I'm including single men in this as well.  I've seen everything from somewhat furnished/decorated, to completely done with help from an interior decorator.  Most people take pride in a home purchase, and they want their home to reflect who they are, and that goes for men and women.  Kyle's situation was different in that he had a roommate, and they were two 20 something guys living in an apartment just trying to survive.  I think when men get to the age/situation where home ownership is a real possibility they are a little more mature, established and settled.

 

I also think "internet company" may be anything, and it may also be code for "functionally unemployed"  or he sells stuff on EBay like Jason.  His business has never been explained.  We know what everyone else does.  Mark has his own company renting pianos, Melanie is a nurse, Kyle is a bartender, Loren was an assistant, Josh is in dental school.  Fernando is the only one whose job we don't know.  I think if it was anything at all impressive or interesting, he would be the first to let us know.  The same way he made sure to let the world know his "parents live with him"

 

But again, I think if its a novel idea, its tempting to believe it.  But I'm familiar enough with the line to know when its a lie, and in Fernando's case....its a lie.