Kris: Pimp Momager

[truelovekiss]

I think that Kris saw Bruce as a "fixer-upper," (like the most underrated Frozen song says!) and in her position, she had to move on quickly. Kris likes the finer things, and she sure as hell wasn't going to take a job that she found "beneath" her status, to make a living that was less than what she was used to. She needed a man that had money in the bank and future earning potential, would care for her and her four kids, was popular and had a social position and would let her have her way. Enter Bruce Jenner. Sure he had four kids of his own, not as much money in the bank as Robert K, and that pesky crossdressing habit, but Kris saw he had potential. I have no doubt that Bruce always loved her, but I don't believe she truly loved him, at least not as much. Same thing with Robert Sr. I think she believed in marrying for money, and finding love elsewhere.

[ms.o]

I shouldn't be surprised, but damn this is egotistical

http://www.people.com/article/kris-jenner-files-legal-documents-trademark-nickname-momager

[iwasish]

I shouldn't be surprised, but damn this is egotistical

http://www.people.com/article/kris-jenner-files-legal-documents-trademark-nickname-momager

If she were smart she'd trademark pimpmomager or pimpmom. It's closer to reality.

[GaT]

TMZ posted this, can't stop laughing

http://www.tmz.com/2015/07/12/kris-jenner-photo/

[Shangrilala]

Okay, can I ask a dumb question?  It's July.  Why are they all wearing such bulky clothes?  Is it cold in LA in July?  (seriously...)  

[iwasish]

TMZ posted this, can't stop laughing

http://www.tmz.com/2015/07/12/kris-jenner-photo/

I thought Jerry Seinfeld donated the puffy shirt to the Smithsonian? The low talker should sue for theft of design.

[DangerousMinds]

It's been super hot in LA, in the 80's and 90's. Their heavy clothes are a joke. Remember when Kimmy was strutting around NYC in freezing winter weather barely dressed?

[truelovekiss]

TMZ posted this, can't stop laughing

http://www.tmz.com/2015/07/12/kris-jenner-photo/

The first thing that came to my mind was that it looks like she put some wholes in a hefty bag. Wtf is going on with this, she literally looks like she's wearing a garbage bag. Bible.

[iwasish]

The first thing that came to my mind was that it looks like she put some wholes in a hefty bag. Wtf is going on with this, she literally looks like she's wearing a garbage bag. Bible.

I read this post too quickly and thought it said "she put some whores in a hefty bag" 

[jnymph]

I can't stand the way this bitch insists on saying " you guys" in every other sentence.

[GaT]

Kris is dressing like Justin Bieber now. I don't even know what to say.

http://stylenews.peoplestylewatch.com/2015/06/29/kris-jenner-justin-bieber-balmain-blazer-faceoff/

[Crucial]

Kris is dressing like Justin Bieber now. I don't even know what to say.

http://stylenews.peoplestylewatch.com/2015/06/29/kris-jenner-justin-bieber-balmain-blazer-faceoff/

She looks about 15 years older than her actual age with the hair greased back, glasses, and too young blazer.  Dress within 10 years of your age when photographed in bright sunlight.

[Kromm]

TMZ posted this, can't stop laughing

http://www.tmz.com/2015/07/12/kris-jenner-photo/

Well Kris IS garbage, so it makes sense she's walking around inside a garbage bag.

[Coffeecup]

http://www.tmz.com/2015/07/29/caitlyn-jenner-kris-jenner-first-meeting-transformation-malibu-house/

"Caitlyn and Kris: let's talk girl to girl" [story published on July 29. Caption on photo of Kris' car says July 28.]

 

TMZ says Kris went to visit Caitlyn at the Malibu house for a heart-to-heart talk. "Kris' car was spotted leaving Caitlyn's Malibu home after their meeting ... their first meeting since the transformation. Sources connected to the former couple tell us, Kris had not met Caitlyn... Our sources say they talked out some of their issues and it went well. We're told it got very personal ... as you know, there are multiple versions of what Kris knew and when she knew it... As for the future, at least from Kris' side ... she's hopeful this is a fresh beginning..."

 

Kris gives/sells stories to TMZ practically every day, so I'm willing to bet she herself was the source. Also willing to bet both Kris and Caitlyn wanted cameras at this meeting, so they could use the footage for their respective reality shows and interviews.

 

I'm not so sure Kris is hopeful for "a fresh beginning."  I think she's just hoping to make a lot of money off Caitlyn's transition. She never does anything without some financial incentive. Between the time her feet hit the floor in the morning and the time she finishes her breakfast, she's probably gone over a dozen spreadsheets detailing how much revenue the various Kardashian/Jenner enterprises, bookings and media coverage will bring in that day. There must be a big nasty negative red balance on the spreadsheet for revenue she had anticipated for telling the media all about how she's suffered, being the bewildered, naïve, traumatized wife of a surprise transgender husband. Gotta fill in some numbers there and get in the black. If Kris "cries all day," as Kim said, it would be because she hasn't figured out how to make the money yet.

 

She might have made a little "Caitlyn Cash" already. Somebody on another forum (or another thread here? Can't remember where) pointed out that Kris is the business manager for her kids, so she would have gotten her cut from any payment Kim and Kylie got for appearing on "I Am Cait" last Sunday.

Edited July 30, 2015 by Coffeecup

[GaT]

 We're told it got very personal ... 

 

Uh oh, Kris found out they have the same dress.

[Artsda]

It was probably for 'I am Cait'. 

[Fostersmom]

She looks about 15 years older than her actual age with the hair greased back, glasses, and too young blazer.  Dress within 10 years of your age when photographed in bright sunlight.

 

Damn, she looks like she's 70 in that picture. Unless her mission was to look older than everyone, that's a complete wardrobe fail. 

[GaT]

Damn, she looks like she's 70 in that picture. Unless her mission was to look older than everyone, that's a complete wardrobe fail. 

You say that like she ever has wardrobe success LOL

[Fostersmom]

True. Very, very, true. 

[Coffeecup]

It was probably for 'I am Cait'. 

That's what I thought, and according to Radar, that's exactly what happened.

 

http://radaronline.com/celebrity-news/kris-jenner-caitlyn-jenner-feud-reunion-filmed-reality-show-i-am-cait/

Saving Face? Kris Jenner’s First Meeting With Caitlyn Was Filmed For ‘I Am Cait’ — Inside The ‘Emotional ‘ Shoot

Posted on Jul 31, 2015 @ 11:54AM

 

... RadarOnline.com has learned Kris didn’t do it just to meet Caitlyn face-to-face, but to save her own! The Keeping Up with the Kardashians momager allowed the meeting to be filmed for I Am Cait in the hopes of giving herself a PR boost. “Never wanting to miss an opportunity to further advance her public image, Kris knew it would be a good thing to have the reunion with Caitlyn filmed,” an insider said. “They were both in full hair and make-up, and dressed very fashionably.” ...

[DangerousMinds]

Further advance her public image? Good luck with that.

[Coffeecup]

http://www.eonline.com/news/686648/kris-jenner-talks-kourtney-kardashian-s-split-caitlyn-jenner-more-6-juiciest-tidbits-from-her-latest-interview

E Online, Aug. 14, 2015, "Kris Jenner Talks Kourtney Kardashian's Split, Caitlyn Jenner & More—6 Juiciest Tidbits From Her Latest Interview"

 

E has six quotes from Kris' new interview in Haute Living magazine. (Never heard of it.) Take a look at no. 6:

 

6. How She Pays No Mind to the Cyber Bullies: The E! star slams those who judge her famous family from afar, especially when she lives by the old saying, 'If you don't have something nice to say, then don't say it at all. She added, "People hide behind 'freedom of speech.' That's what you are going to hide behind? I sometimes think that this generation is lacking in decency."

 

Read this astounding statement one more time. "I sometimes think this generation is lacking in decency."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  *catches breath*  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

Pimp Momma Kris Jenner, the brains behind the most sleazy, trashy, vile, greedy, lying, fake, fame-whoring family of the century, has the nerve to lecture the rest of us about DECENCY???

[DangerousMinds]

And she doesn't understand "freedom of speech" at ALL.

[iwasish]

If she doesn't pay attention, how does she know how much negativity there is? Because she reads every fucking blog, post, article or comment and keeps track of favorable/negative.

Also why disclose any info about Scott and Kourtney? She's just trying to drum up attention for the next season.

[Cosmic Muffin]

Great find, coffeecup, and the quote about "this generation is lacking in decency" is so rich coming from her. So judgmental and from such a high horse. I wonder if she's ever watched her own stupid show? I could list many specific times one or all of them lacked decency.

[Kromm]

Every time there's even a hint of a reason to feel sorry for this woman, Kris goes and shows her true colors and you can again see the person who doesn't deserve any sympathy ever for anything.

 

She really just needs to go fuck herself.  The kind you don't enjoy, I mean.

[Crucial]

6. How She Pays No Mind to the Cyber Bullies: The E! star slams those who judge her famous family from afar, especially when she lives by the old saying, 'If you don't have something nice to say, then don't say it at all. She added, "People hide behind 'freedom of speech.' That's what you are going to hide behind? I sometimes think that this generation is lacking in decency

 

Does she not understand that if those that didn't like this family didn't click on links/sites/comment on this waste of a family they would not be as famous as they are.  I truly believe that all the clicks and comments stating how horrible/waste of talent they are they wouldn't stay in the news.  Your negative press outweighs any positive this family gets and that's what is helping to keep them front and center.  I'm a huge problem of that too.

 

Any comment from her on decency of any kind is more reason to give her and the family crap. Kris is going to have to up her game, she's running out of tricks.  But the latest of pimping out Kylie with her pervert of a boyfriend....Oooops she's 18 now he's not a pervert is working.  He proved it by the sexy pic he posted on the 18th b-day 9no matter how long he had that pic). 

[Coffeecup]

What the ??????  There's a  photo going viral of Kris in bed with Jennifer Lawrence, celebrating Jennifer's birthday. It's a joke photo, but still, why is an A-lister like Jennifer having anything to do with Kris Jenner? I was just reading that Jennifer is now the highest paid actress. Was Jennifer that desperate for any more tabloid media coverage and more social media clicks, that she'd pose with Kris in this dumbass picture?

 

And what is going on with Kris' hashtag, #Bible ???? She wants people who are searching Instagram for #Bible to see this picture? Why?

 

http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/jennifer-lawrence-gets-caught-in-bed-with-kris-jenner-pic-2015228

US Magazine, Aug. 22, 2015, "Jennifer Lawrence Celebrates Birthday in Bed With Kris Jenner -- See The Amazing Pic!"

Uh, what on earth is going on here?! Jennifer Lawrence was snapped cuddling up in bed with reality TV star Kris Jenner in what has to be one of the most bizarre Instagram pictures ever!

 

Jenner, 59, who shared the snap (taken by her boyfriend Corey Gamble) via Instagram in the early hours of Saturday, August 22, explained that the intimate moment was part of a belated birthday celebration for Hunger Games star Lawrence, who turned 25 on August 15.

 

"Happy Birthday you piece of sh-t..." the famed momager captioned her snap. "God I love you #Jenniferlawrence thanks for making this night a night to remember.....even if we did get caught... I love you Happy Birthday Gorgeous!!! #Bible #momager #doll. Photo cred @coreygamble"

 

The bizarre photograph shows Jenner and Lawrence, both wearing black, lying on the bed together, their legs intertwined. Both are clutching works 20th century literature (Jenner is holding The Plague by Albert Camus, while Lawrence has Joan Didian's Play It As It Lays in her fingers).

 

But while Lawrence and Jenner might not appear at first to be obvious bedfellows, let alone pals, it makes a little more sense when we cast our minds back to January, when Kim Kardashian revealed the Oscar-winning actress (who is a self-professed reality TV junkie) was so excited to meet her famous family, that she actually screamed!

 

"I was in NYC and I ran into Jennifer Lawrence," Kardashian, 34, recalled to The Sun, while attending the E! International junket in L.A. "We said, 'Hi' and walked into the elevator and as the doors were closing. She screamed across the lobby, 'I love your show!' We were laughing so hard."

Edited August 22, 2015 by Coffeecup

[Kromm]

Jennifer Lawrence has gone on record as being addicted to all kinds of trash reality TV. She's said it in multiple interviews.

[Joe Jitsu913]

What the ?????? There's a photo going viral of Kris in bed with Jennifer Lawrence, celebrating Jennifer's birthday. It's a joke photo, but still, why is an A-lister like Jennifer having anything to do with Kris Jenner? I was just reading that Jennifer is now the highest paid actress. Was Jennifer that desperate for any more tabloid media coverage and more social media clicks, that she'd pose with Kris in this dumbass picture?

And what is going on with Kris' hashtag, #Bible ???? She wants people who are searching Instagram for #Bible to see this picture? Why?

'BIBLE' is some lame catchphrase they use to let you know they're telling the truth. Similar to 'I swear to God' or 'I swear on the Bible'.

[Coffeecup]

'BIBLE' is some lame catchphrase they use to let you know they're telling the truth. Similar to 'I swear to God' or 'I swear on the Bible'.

LOL, I don't think I'll ever get up to speed on social media slang.

 

Now that I know Kris meant she was figuratively swearing on the Bible to tell the truth, my comment is: When has Kris ever been known for being truthful? She and everybody else in that family are masters of deceit.

[GaT]

LOL, I don't think I'll ever get up to speed on social media slang.

 

 

That's not social media slang, that's strictly a Kardashian thing :-)

[Kromm]

Saying "Bible" for "to tell the truth" is a majorly assaholic thing, IMO.

 

I mean it's both disrespectful to be people who do believe in the Bible AND to people who don't.  The people who do suddenly have these horrible lying immoral reality show people invoking it, which is definitely an insult, and the people who don't believe it the Bible have to listen to the Bible being equated TO truth.

[truelovekiss]

Saying "Bible" for "to tell the truth" is a majorly assaholic thing, IMO.

I mean it's both disrespectful to be people who do believe in the Bible AND to people who don't. The people who do suddenly have these horrible lying immoral reality show people invoking it, which is definitely an insult, and the people who don't believe it the Bible have to listen to the Bible being equated TO truth.

I'd like to take that one step further to say that the Kardashians as a whole are insulting to all people.

[Coffeecup]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3215509/No-time-change-Khloe-Kardashian-wears-gym-kit-Kris-Jenner-s-book-signing-livens-things-plunging-top.html

Daily Mail, Aug. 29, 2015, "No time to change? Khloe Kardashian wears her gym kit to Kris Jenner's book signing... but livens things up in plunging top"

Kris did a book signing for her cookbook, "In the Kitchen with Kris," at the grand opening of a Williams-Sonoma store today. However, the DM article was mostly about the low-cut gym top Khloe wore. Hahaha,the one who shows the most boobies gets the most attention. Khloe looked like warmed-over crap, but Kris' dress was even worse: a short white dress with gigantic red roses printed all over it. Not flattering. She looked like she was wearing drapery fabric.

DM said "Kris Jenner is like fine wine, the woman looks better with age!" *choke* *barf* *LMAO*

About Kris' cookbook, why is she still bothering to flog that thing? It was published in October 2014 and it has horrible reviews, averaging 2.5 stars on Amazon, and 52% of the reviews are one-star. Read the reviews if you want a good laugh. Examples:

"Okay, So you figure 'How bad could it be?' Let me tell you. Eat the book itself, it will taste better than the recipes within."

"I bought this for my mom for Christmas as a gag gift. The first recipe is for cream of wheat, and it calls for one package of cream of wheat, 2 tablespoons milk or water, and sugar to taste. The look on her face when she opened it was so worth the 3.99 I paid for it (bought it used) and everyone was cracking up. I highly recommend this cookbook as a gag gift for the people in your life who actually like to cook and are good at it. Classic."

"Why is her family always eating out of take out containers on their show if she is such a fabulous cook? They do have their weekly Sunday dinner that Kris likes to make such a deal out of but its cooked by hired chefs."

"Somebody hated me enough to gift this book as a secret office party gift."

And so on.

[JocelynCavanaugh]

"Gym kit"? Britishisms about American subjects are so jarring.

[GaT]

Yeah, I believe Khloe was working out in that top, please. She's in full makeup, she's not sweaty at all, & she's wearing giant hoop earrings. She wasn't anywhere near a gym, she just decided to dress like that for whatever reason.

 

And while Kris has chosen another wrong thing to wear (I guess bad taste can be inherited), there's a picture of her in a bikini (taken by papps, so no photoshop) & she looks great. 

[Lakewood27]

Yeah, I believe Khloe was working out in that top, please. She's in full makeup, she's not sweaty at all, & she's wearing giant hoop earrings. She wasn't anywhere near a gym, she just decided to dress like that for whatever reason.

The writers of KUWtK have decided that Khloe is the "fitness junkie" this season. She's all about cardio and pumping iron at the gym. When she's not getting lipo and injecting it into her butt, that is.

[Kromm]

eater.com : The 23 Most Ridiculous Lines From Kris Jenner's Kookbook

 

Cosmopolitan.com : The 10 Most Wonderfully Absurd Moments in Kris Jenner's Cookbook. What a kook!

[GaT]

From the Cosmo article

 

8. When she inadvertently reveals her favorite child in the index of the book. I'm not saying you can determine a mother's level of affection for her children based on the number of times they appear in the index of her cookbook, but if you theoretically could, you'd learn that Kris loves Kim best (11), followed by Khloé (8), Kourtney and Rob (6 each), Kendall (3), and Kylie (2). Sounds about right.

LOL

[iwasish]

From the Cosmo article

LOL

No mention of Caitlyn? Or beloved Robert Sr?

[GaT]

They were just talking about the kids, not the husbands.

[Coffeecup]

Yeah, I believe Khloe was working out in that top, please. She's in full makeup, she's not sweaty at all, & she's wearing giant hoop earrings. She wasn't anywhere near a gym, she just decided to dress like that for whatever reason.

 

And while Kris has chosen another wrong thing to wear (I guess bad taste can be inherited), there's a picture of her in a bikini (taken by papps, so no photoshop) & she looks great.

I wondered about that bikini photo too. She looks slender there, but she looked huge in the rose print dress. I think the Kards have agreements with some of the paps to Photoshop pictures, so it's possible that the bikini photo was altered. Or maybe that rose dress was just cut so boxy that it made her look 35 pounds heavier.

[Kromm]

 

8. When she inadvertently reveals her favorite child in the index of the book. I'm not saying you can determine a mother's level of affection for her children based on the number of times they appear in the index of her cookbook, but if you theoretically could, you'd learn that Kris loves Kim best (11), followed by Khloé (8), Kourtney and Rob (6 each), Kendall (3), and Kylie (2). Sounds about right.

I wonder if the rankings have changed since she wrote the book.  I mean Kendall is much more the walking talking cash register now that she was a few years ago--one would think she'd rank higher now.  And Rob? What has Rob done for Kris?  Probably COST her money, not earned it. 

[Maire]

Kris and her boy toy at the MTV awards. Lol! Doesn't she ever take her Spanx off and have a night at home? I doubt it.

[GaT]

Kris and her boy toy at the MTV awards. Lol! Doesn't she ever take her Spanx off and have a night at home? I doubt it.

I saw that, I was wondering what possible reason she could have for being there, but apparently her boyfriend works for Justin Bieber's manager, so he's in the business. I don't know what he does, but it's something to do with music. LOL

[Maire]

I saw that, I was wondering what possible reason she could have for being there, but apparently her boyfriend works for Justin Bieber's manager, so he's in the business. I don't know what he does, but it's something to do with music. LOL

Ahhhhh that makes sense at least!

Edited August 31, 2015 by Maire

[howmanywords]

Well Kourtney was there too and she has even less of a reason to be there. Kanye received the biggest honor of the night so maybe they were just there to show family support.

[Artsda]

That's why they were there other than Kylie who had other reasons, she was on the presenting list and Tyga's date.

 

For some reason Kris is scheduled to be a guest on Bachelor in Paradise Aftershow where they talk about the episode tonight. LOL I guess she'll say yes to anything they ask her to be on.

[GaT]

Story about Kris having an allergic reaction http://www.tmz.com/2015/09/02/kris-jenner-spider-bite-allergic-reaction-photo/

My first thought after reading it was to wonder if all her daughters looked at her lip & started calling around to see where they could get some spiders.